Not Broken; Just Bent

M'Niall. I'm staying at Waterhouse Rehabilitation Center to try and get treated for alcoholism. I'm not too keen on sleeping through the night, and I have a thing for over emotional breakdowns. *caution: posts may be triggering*

[liiampayynerp]

Liam let out a small sigh as he wrapped an arm around Niall and held the boy close, kissing his head softly. “It’ll never happen again, baby. I promise. I love you.” Liam said softly. He felt terrible, he knew all the shit Niall had been through and he just did that. He needed to get a grip and fix his own problems instead of causing Niall problems.

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall was still far tenser than usual, and he refused to let himself relax completely into Liam. No matter how much he loved the boy he was still scared. It wasn't as if he had never been hit before, but it had never been by someone who he was dating. "Never," he repeated hesitantly and rubbed his eyes. If there was even a chance of him getting to go home by April, there was no way he was going to put himself through anything else that could revert his progress. Niall loved Liam, but he couldn't let people walk all over him anymore and then take the blame himself. "Do you have anger management therapy or anything? Because... if not I think that would be a good idea. It helps," Niall pecked Liam's cheek and smiled weakly. 

[intoxi-catedniall]

whats your favorite color

Uh, blue probably. 

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall looked up and nodded slowly. Inching over on the bed, he reached out to take Liam’s hand and hesitantly rested his head on the boy’s shoulder. “If it ever happens again I will leave you,” he warned quietly and tightened his grip on Liam’s hand. “I’m serious. I’m...

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall listened to Liam and stayed silent for a while after he finished before nodding. "I love you. I don't want to fight anymore, I'm too tired," Niall yawned and blinked dazedly. "I just want to go to bed," Curling up into the other boy's chest he sniffled quietly and ran his fingers over his cheek. "Ow," he mumbled and squirmed nervously.

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

"You’re mad because you think that I don’t trust you, which I fucking do as I’ve explained about a dozen times, and then you slapped me," Niall swallowed thickly and curled up into a ball. "How the fuck am I supposed to trust you now?" He whimpered and wiped his eyes....

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall looked up and nodded slowly. Inching over on the bed, he reached out to take Liam's hand and hesitantly rested his head on the boy's shoulder. "If it ever happens again I will leave you," he warned quietly and tightened his grip on Liam's hand. "I'm serious. I'm fucked up enough as it is, I refuse to be treated that way. I might be tough to be with, but I sure as hell don't deserve that,"

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

"Don’t touch me," Niall warned as soon as Liam moved towards him, and tugged his knees up to his chest. The pain in his cheek was duller now, but he still couldn’t seem to grasp what had just happened. "You hit me," he let out a shaky breath and shook his head. "I know I...

[intoxi-catedniall]

"You're mad because you think that I don't trust you, which I fucking do as I've explained about a dozen times, and then you slapped me," Niall swallowed thickly and curled up into a ball. "How the fuck am I supposed to trust you now?" He whimpered and wiped his eyes. Crying had only seemed to make his face redder, and he tried his best to seem as put together as possible.

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall immediately pushed Liam’s hands off of him. “I told you to get out,” he shouted and moved away from the wall. Getting as far from Liam as possible in the small room, he ended up sitting at the edge of his bed with his face in his hands. Niall felt like he couldn’t...

[intoxi-catedniall]

"Don't touch me," Niall warned as soon as Liam moved towards him, and tugged his knees up to his chest. The pain in his cheek was duller now, but he still couldn't seem to grasp what had just happened. "You hit me," he let out a shaky breath and shook his head. "I know I can be hard to handle sometimes but... You can't just hurt me when you're upset. You're not supposed to hurt the people that you love," Niall scooted backwards into the corner of the bed.

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall’s hand came up to touch his face where Liam had hit him, and his eyes widened. Though he had been in countless bar fights before because of his temper, this was different. “Please go,” he whispered and attempted to push the other boy away from him. “Get out,” Niall...

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall immediately pushed Liam's hands off of him. "I told you to get out," he shouted and moved away from the wall. Getting as far from Liam as possible in the small room, he ended up sitting at the edge of his bed with his face in his hands. Niall felt like he couldn't breathe as he sat shaking and trying to blink back tears. "Oh my god," his voice cracked halfway through, and he tugged at his hair before looking up at Liam helplessly.

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

"Liam you’re hurting me," Niall tried to pull his arm away and winced at the other boy’s grip. Up until now Liam had never been rough with him. It didn’t seem like he was the type to ever react this way, and Niall was in shock. "Let me go," he said and yanked his arm back.

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall's hand came up to touch his face where Liam had hit him, and his eyes widened. Though he had been in countless bar fights before because of his temper, this was different. "Please go," he whispered and attempted to push the other boy away from him. "Get out," Niall said more forcefully, and ignored the tears welling up in his eyes. The side of his face still stung, and he kept his hand against it still unable to believe that Liam had actually slapped him.

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Why are you making such a big deal out of this? Worse shit has happened and we didn’t fight like this over it,” he argued back, but quickly stopped talking when Liam started to push him back against the wall. “Stop,” he tried to...

[intoxi-catedniall]

"Liam you're hurting me," Niall tried to pull his arm away and winced at the other boy's grip. Up until now Liam had never been rough with him. It didn't seem like he was the type to ever react this way, and Niall was in shock. "Let me go," he said and yanked his arm back.

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall flinched at the slam and stumbled backwards. Crossing his arms, he leaned against the wall and coughed to break the silence. “You know I wasn’t accusing you of cheating on me,” he offered quietly and kept his eyes cast down. Liam had always been nothing but kind to...

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Why are you making such a big deal out of this? Worse shit has happened and we didn't fight like this over it," he argued back, but quickly stopped talking when Liam started to push him back against the wall. "Stop," he tried to squirm away, but was unable to squeeze by Liam. "Maybe you should just go. We can talk this out when you're less angry," Niall piped up and shuffled nervously against the wall.

[liiampayynerp]

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall hadn’t meant to set Liam off, and he was surprised to have gotten into such a huge fight. Standing outside the door to his room waiting patiently for Liam, he fiddled with his fingers and wondered what was going to happen. Even though they were both irritated...

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall flinched at the slam and stumbled backwards. Crossing his arms, he leaned against the wall and coughed to break the silence. "You know I wasn't accusing you of cheating on me," he offered quietly and kept his eyes cast down. Liam had always been nothing but kind to him, and it was frightening to see the other side of him. "I'm sorry," he added quickly and glanced up quickly.

[liiampayynerp]

Liam slammed his fist onto the hard wood of his bedside table. Niall was on his nerves, how could he even say something like that? Liam was far from happy. He quickly changed into workout clothes and slammed his bedroom door as he walked out, making his way down the hall heading to Niall’s room.

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall hadn't meant to set Liam off, and he was surprised to have gotten into such a huge fight. Standing outside the door to his room waiting patiently for Liam, he fiddled with his fingers and wondered what was going to happen. Even though they were both irritated with each other, the other boy refused to let him stay in bed instead of join him at the gym. "Hi," he said in a small voice when he saw Liam, and attempted a small smile.

[liiampayynerp]

Liam took a sip of the wine, raising an eyebrow shortly at Niall, questioning why he took the water before realizing. “Shit. Shit shit, I’m so sorry. Wine? What the hell was I thinking?” Liam said hurriedly, taking the glass away from Niall’s setting. “Shit…. I’m sorry I’m an idiot.” He sighed.

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall watched Liam casually for a few seconds before he set his glass down and shook his head. "Calm down, it's okay," he laughed and reached over to pat the boy's arm soothingly. "Seriously. It is in no way the first time someone has done something like that. Like, I went home to Ireland. I watched everyone else drink the world's best beer while I sipped on juice. Not ideal, obviously, but it doesn't bother me," Niall assured him. "Just don't get too drunk. I want you to remember what's going to happen tonight after we get back to that hotel when you wake up tomorrow, alright?" he smirked.

[liiampayynerp]

Liam smiled as Niall took his hand. “A little birdie told me that you wanted to try tapas and this was a good place to get them.” He smiled, looking around the restaurant again. Liam called a waiter over and ordered a bottle of wine, which was brought to their table. “Cheers to us?” He smiled, holding up his glass.

[intoxi-catedniall]

"Oh that's why Louis was pestering me about my favorite food," Niall laughed, realizing that it should have clicked a long time ago. Glancing at the wine, he crinkled his nose and tightened his grip around the glass of water in front of him. "You're incredibly lame. But yes, cheers," he giggled and clinked his drink against Liam's before taking a sip of the water. 

[liiampayynerp]

Liam chuckled softly and pecked Niall’s lips again, his hands rested on the boys hips before pulling away and taking his hand. “C’mon, we have reservations.” He smiled, walking down the streets of Paris with Niall and finding the place easily, fogón st-julian. “Well, here we are.” He smiled, leading Niall inside and being seated at a nicely set table, smelling the food already.

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall followed Liam, practically stumbling over his feet at the excitement. Though he was often impatient and overly curious, surprises tended to be one of his favorite things. "It's so nice," he gaped, glancing down to fix his tie in hopes that he was dressed well enough for a place like this. "Where did you hear about this, it's incredible," he looked around the restaurant in awe and absentmindedly reached across the table to take Liam's hand. 

[liiampayynerp]

Liam smiled as the cab driver pulled over at their stop, the Eiffel Tower. Liam reached over and handed the man money before pushing the door open and leading Niall out, taking the boys hand once they were outside. “Wow, it’s beautiful.” Liam said, staring up at the tower before looking down to Niall and pressing their lips together slowly and sweetly. “Kiss in front of the Eiffel Tower seemed necessary.” He chuckled.

[intoxi-catedniall]

Niall stared up doe eyed at the tower as he climbed out of the car. It took him by surprise how nice it actually was in person, especially at night. Though he had seen countless pictures, he had never really understood the fuss about it until now. Liam's kiss took him by surprise, but he still wrapped his arms around the boy's shoulders and held him close for much longer than usual. "Kissing everywhere is necessary. Especially here,"

[liiampayynerp]

"Oh god thats terrible, Niall. I’m so sorry." Liam said softly, running his thumb over the boys hand gently. "Nothing like that is gonna happen though, you’ll be okay." He said softly, leaning over and pressing a soft kiss to the boys head. "Let’s just forget about all the shit thats happened in both our lives, and make this the perfect night, yea?" He asked with a small smile.

[intoxi-catedniall]

"S'okay," Niall said quietly and shrugged. There wasn't much that he could do about his past, and he needed to keep moving forward just like his therapists told him. If he ever wanted to get out of Waterhouse and begin his life properly, he would have to let go of everything that had gone wrong in his life before. "Perfect night. I quite like the sound of that," he smiled and pressed their lips together quickly.