InvariablyPerfect

SkekSo the Emperor

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Well...how was it?

I refuse to comment

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[@skekzeng]

Um, hello, most, uh, glorious Emperor. The General said I should talk to you?

Yes... yes... I'm aware you- gosh you're ugly- I'm aware you harbour... pardon me, a minor retch, you harbour an interest in the General

[skekzeng]

*Frowns at makes a quiet "oh" at the appearance comment* *Nervous hand-wringing* Well, I...yes. I mean, who wouldn't? You probably know what I mean, after all, you have impeachable--impeccable taste, sire.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

It's the only thing making this conversation tolerable. If that is the word that can be used. You... don't intend on giving up this vexxing irritation

[skekzeng]

Uh... I can't really "give up" feelings, they're just there. :\

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Thraaaa you skekling... disgusting. What's wrong with you people? 'Feelings' What even are they? What are you talking about?

[skekzeng]

Oh, gee, uh. Well. You know when you see someone and you're happy? Or it's like moths are flying around in your stomach? Or...other stuff I respectfully won't say because it's probably inappropriate.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

@absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog I'm feeling sick

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

FORGIVE ME SIRE, LET ME FAN YOU

[skekzeng]

I am also a fan of you, sire, you're the best emperor we've ever had! *Awkward pause as Zeng realizes the attempt to kiss up has totally missed the mark.*

...Oh, you meant an actual fan, like, for fanning stuff.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Why? @absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog Why?

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

FORGIVE ME, SIRE, BUT THIS CONVERSATION WAS YOUR IDEA

[skekzeng]

What am I supposed to do? :-: I'm trying, really, but as you've probably noticed I'm not very smart. They tell me that all the time.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Just stand there and be quiet whilst I gird my loins. This is agonising for me

[skekzeng]

*Stands there and miraculously manages to stay quiet, while inwardly thinking "hehehe, he said loins"*

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Well I've sat here for several days, my body and mind degrading as it holds onto this atrocious thought but... I suppose... we'll have to do things the old fashioned way. Thra help us. Let's just all get... I can't say it... SkekVar help me I feel weak

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

ALRIGHT. HERE WE GO. @skekzeng TAKE OF YOUR CLOTHES AND THEN FADE THE SITUATION TO BLACK. NOBODY NEEDS TO SEE THIS, I HAVE A REPUTATION TO UPHOLD

[skekzeng]

Hh...wait you mean... You both-- o.o;;; *Almost passes out* .oO(Don't wuss out now Zeng, this might be your only chance!) Ah um--yes, my uh--pleasure. ^.^;

*Oddly enough, it does fade to black, as though some strange gremlins with nothing better to do are actually controlling these characters.*

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[@skekzeng]

Um, hello, most, uh, glorious Emperor. The General said I should talk to you?

Yes... yes... I'm aware you- gosh you're ugly- I'm aware you harbour... pardon me, a minor retch, you harbour an interest in the General

[skekzeng]

*Frowns at makes a quiet "oh" at the appearance comment* *Nervous hand-wringing* Well, I...yes. I mean, who wouldn't? You probably know what I mean, after all, you have impeachable--impeccable taste, sire.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

It's the only thing making this conversation tolerable. If that is the word that can be used. You... don't intend on giving up this vexxing irritation

[skekzeng]

Uh... I can't really "give up" feelings, they're just there. :\

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Thraaaa you skekling... disgusting. What's wrong with you people? 'Feelings' What even are they? What are you talking about?

[skekzeng]

Oh, gee, uh. Well. You know when you see someone and you're happy? Or it's like moths are flying around in your stomach? Or...other stuff I respectfully won't say because it's probably inappropriate.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

@absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog I'm feeling sick

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

FORGIVE ME SIRE, LET ME FAN YOU

[skekzeng]

I am also a fan of you, sire, you're the best emperor we've ever had! *Awkward pause as Zeng realizes the attempt to kiss up has totally missed the mark.*

...Oh, you meant an actual fan, like, for fanning stuff.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Why? @absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog Why?

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

FORGIVE ME, SIRE, BUT THIS CONVERSATION WAS YOUR IDEA

[skekzeng]

What am I supposed to do? :-: I'm trying, really, but as you've probably noticed I'm not very smart. They tell me that all the time.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Just stand there and be quiet whilst I gird my loins. This is agonising for me

[skekzeng]

*Stands there and miraculously manages to stay quiet, while inwardly thinking "hehehe, he said loins"*

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Well I've sat here for several days, my body and mind degrading as it holds onto this atrocious thought but... I suppose... we'll have to do things the old fashioned way. Thra help us. Let's just all get... I can't say it... SkekVar help me I feel weak

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[@skekzeng]

Um, hello, most, uh, glorious Emperor. The General said I should talk to you?

Yes... yes... I'm aware you- gosh you're ugly- I'm aware you harbour... pardon me, a minor retch, you harbour an interest in the General

[skekzeng]

*Frowns at makes a quiet "oh" at the appearance comment* *Nervous hand-wringing* Well, I...yes. I mean, who wouldn't? You probably know what I mean, after all, you have impeachable--impeccable taste, sire.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

It's the only thing making this conversation tolerable. If that is the word that can be used. You... don't intend on giving up this vexxing irritation

[skekzeng]

Uh... I can't really "give up" feelings, they're just there. :\

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Thraaaa you skekling... disgusting. What's wrong with you people? 'Feelings' What even are they? What are you talking about?

[skekzeng]

Oh, gee, uh. Well. You know when you see someone and you're happy? Or it's like moths are flying around in your stomach? Or...other stuff I respectfully won't say because it's probably inappropriate.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

@absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog I'm feeling sick

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

FORGIVE ME SIRE, LET ME FAN YOU

[skekzeng]

I am also a fan of you, sire, you're the best emperor we've ever had! *Awkward pause as Zeng realizes the attempt to kiss up has totally missed the mark.*

...Oh, you meant an actual fan, like, for fanning stuff.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Why? @absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog Why?

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

FORGIVE ME, SIRE, BUT THIS CONVERSATION WAS YOUR IDEA

[skekzeng]

What am I supposed to do? :-: I'm trying, really, but as you've probably noticed I'm not very smart. They tell me that all the time.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Just stand there and be quiet whilst I gird my loins. This is agonising for me

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Just let skekVar rail the twink. Maybe it'll get it out of their system and they'll leave him alone.

Stop talking me out of it. and THAT is not a 'twink'

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[@skekzeng]

Um, hello, most, uh, glorious Emperor. The General said I should talk to you?

Yes... yes... I'm aware you- gosh you're ugly- I'm aware you harbour... pardon me, a minor retch, you harbour an interest in the General

[skekzeng]

*Frowns at makes a quiet "oh" at the appearance comment* *Nervous hand-wringing* Well, I...yes. I mean, who wouldn't? You probably know what I mean, after all, you have impeachable--impeccable taste, sire.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

It's the only thing making this conversation tolerable. If that is the word that can be used. You... don't intend on giving up this vexxing irritation

[skekzeng]

Uh... I can't really "give up" feelings, they're just there. :\

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Thraaaa you skekling... disgusting. What's wrong with you people? 'Feelings' What even are they? What are you talking about?

[skekzeng]

Oh, gee, uh. Well. You know when you see someone and you're happy? Or it's like moths are flying around in your stomach? Or...other stuff I respectfully won't say because it's probably inappropriate.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

@absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog I'm feeling sick

[absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog]

FORGIVE ME SIRE, LET ME FAN YOU

[skekzeng]

I am also a fan of you, sire, you're the best emperor we've ever had! *Awkward pause as Zeng realizes the attempt to kiss up has totally missed the mark.*

...Oh, you meant an actual fan, like, for fanning stuff.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Why? @absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog Why?

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[@skekzeng]

Um, hello, most, uh, glorious Emperor. The General said I should talk to you?

Yes... yes... I'm aware you- gosh you're ugly- I'm aware you harbour... pardon me, a minor retch, you harbour an interest in the General

[skekzeng]

*Frowns at makes a quiet "oh" at the appearance comment* *Nervous hand-wringing* Well, I...yes. I mean, who wouldn't? You probably know what I mean, after all, you have impeachable--impeccable taste, sire.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

It's the only thing making this conversation tolerable. If that is the word that can be used. You... don't intend on giving up this vexxing irritation

[skekzeng]

Uh... I can't really "give up" feelings, they're just there. :\

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Thraaaa you skekling... disgusting. What's wrong with you people? 'Feelings' What even are they? What are you talking about?

[skekzeng]

Oh, gee, uh. Well. You know when you see someone and you're happy? Or it's like moths are flying around in your stomach? Or...other stuff I respectfully won't say because it's probably inappropriate.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

@absolutelythelargestbeefiesthog I'm feeling sick

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[@skekzeng]

Um, hello, most, uh, glorious Emperor. The General said I should talk to you?

Yes... yes... I'm aware you- gosh you're ugly- I'm aware you harbour... pardon me, a minor retch, you harbour an interest in the General

[skekzeng]

*Frowns at makes a quiet "oh" at the appearance comment* *Nervous hand-wringing* Well, I...yes. I mean, who wouldn't? You probably know what I mean, after all, you have impeachable--impeccable taste, sire.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

It's the only thing making this conversation tolerable. If that is the word that can be used. You... don't intend on giving up this vexxing irritation

[skekzeng]

Uh... I can't really "give up" feelings, they're just there. :\

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Thraaaa you skekling... disgusting. What's wrong with you people? 'Feelings' What even are they? What are you talking about?

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[@skekzeng]

Um, hello, most, uh, glorious Emperor. The General said I should talk to you?

Yes... yes... I'm aware you- gosh you're ugly- I'm aware you harbour... pardon me, a minor retch, you harbour an interest in the General

[skekzeng]

*Frowns at makes a quiet "oh" at the appearance comment* *Nervous hand-wringing* Well, I...yes. I mean, who wouldn't? You probably know what I mean, after all, you have impeachable--impeccable taste, sire.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

It's the only thing making this conversation tolerable. If that is the word that can be used. You... don't intend on giving up this vexxing irritation

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[@skekzeng]

Um, hello, most, uh, glorious Emperor. The General said I should talk to you?

Yes... yes... I'm aware you- gosh you're ugly- I'm aware you harbour... pardon me, a minor retch, you harbour an interest in the General

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[skekLo] my Lord Emperor, if you do not mind me saying so, You have beautiful eyes.

I know, they're one of my many many wonderous qualities

[skeklo-the-jeweler]

Indeed they are, my Sire..

And it is indeed true that you have many, many wonderous qualities.,. Certainly more so than any of your subjects could ever even dream of possessing, of course..

You Are our grand and glorious eternal Emperor, After all.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Exactly

Who are you again?

[skeklo-the-jeweler]

Forgive me, I must have forgotten to introduce myself... my name is skekLo, and I am a Jeweler. I also happen to be the mother of that rather defiant, and dare I say somewhat rebellious, Princess skekOs. As her mother, it is also my duty to watch over her and teach her right from wrong and such, so I apologize once again for her being such an inconvenient nuisance...

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Oh yes, you're that one. No you have introduced yourself, I just struggle to care

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[skekLo] my Lord Emperor, if you do not mind me saying so, You have beautiful eyes.

I know, they're one of my many many wonderous qualities

[skeklo-the-jeweler]

Indeed they are, my Sire..

And it is indeed true that you have many, many wonderous qualities.,. Certainly more so than any of your subjects could ever even dream of possessing, of course..

You Are our grand and glorious eternal Emperor, After all.

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Exactly

Who are you again?

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

[skekLo] my Lord Emperor, if you do not mind me saying so, You have beautiful eyes.

I know, they're one of my many many wonderous qualities

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Sire, I am so terribly sorry these rabble are bothering you. Shall I arrange for a Podling choir to provide entertainment?

Yes and make it loud. Get them to cover Death Grips

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

No, you're pathetic and im stinky.

Are you a child?

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Excretions excretions skekvar's excretions

Are you ill?

[invariablyandundeniablyemperor]

Hey emperor, why did u ban Var from the internet exactly? Like, for wut reason?

Because he is irresponsible