The Girl With The Orange Hair

[isobelrse]

Goodbye

Goodbye and good luck my once dear friend. This is killing me, but I’m a firm believer that everything that happens in our life happens for a reason. I met you many months ago for some reason, still unknown to me. Every laugh, smile and moment we shared were fantastically materialised by something greater than us. And sadly so were each moment that you made me cry and I made you mad. But maybe running into you this morning was supposed to happen as well. I think it was the last time I’d see you. I know you’re leaving in the morning and it breaks my heart. I really didn’t think bumping into you at breakfast would be our goodbye.

[isobelrse]

It’s raining outside and it’s glorious. I wonder are you thinking the same thing? Are you sitting at your desk or on your couch having a quick glance out the window at the summer rain poring from the dark grey sky? Or have you even noticed? 

[studylustre]

concept: go to sleep early and wake up early to tackle the day, accomplish Things™ reality: goes to bed at 2am, wakes up at 12pm, is dead inside

[thecoffeedesk]

this is scary accurate

[isobelrse]

Blue

I still love the colour blue, and I’m still absolutely mad about you.Your voice, mannerisms, being and existence. The drunken babbling I did, the drunken promises you made. If only we could have stayed drunk forever, under the shining stars filling midnight blue sky. The same sky I saw the twinkle in your blue eyes when you looked at me. I have to think hard to remember the words you spoke. But the image of you saying those words is forever etched in my brain, regardless of any sour thoughts I’ve had about you or the bitter things we’ve done to one another. The forgetfulness has come through forgiving which came with time and distance. But I could never forget that colour blue.

[isobelrse]

A hell of a lot can change in a month and even more can change in one hundred and sixteen days. Life has been awful. I have good weeks and bad weeks. I feel anger, sadness and tiredness so much easier than I feel happiness, joy and enthusiasm. I’m totally bummed out. I keep attempting to remind myself not to blame myself but all I do is rethink old scenarios, conversations we had five months ago, and arguments we could have avoided. I redesign your future and mine so that they fit together. I plan things we could have done together. I think about the questions I should have asked you. I think about why things went from one hundred to zero so quickly. Then I feel guilty. Maybe things would have worked out? I’m sorry if it was me that ruined it, if I wasn’t up to your expectations. I’m sorry if I disappointed you. I’m also sorry that I’m wrecking my own head, wondering if I had of been skinner, more blonde, older, younger, maybe if I drank less or was less attached to you we would have worked out. I’m jealous of anyone who comes close to you. I know i’ll get over you but as for right now I’m just not. 

[isobelrse]

“every morning that second before my eyes open, that’s my only second of peace. When I’m asleep I see your face, my dreams are scenarios of us, my nightmares are those tough days playing over and over again as if I’m trapped. But when slumber ends and I lie there, for a brief moment none of it ever happened I’ll turn over unable to wipe a smile from my face, I’ll get up and pull the curtains staring out into the sun filled day of possibilities.

But I don’t open my eyes with a smile anymore and the floor beside my bed is filled with the tissues that caught my tears. the tissues are a harsh reminder that it wasn’t a dream, it all happened and then you left me. Taking with you my smile. But you were kind enough to leave me with that moment every morning where I think it never happened and now that moment is all I have”

[isobelrse]

“every morning that second before my eyes open, that’s my only second of peace. When I’m asleep I see your face, my dreams are scenarios of us, my nightmares are those tough days playing over and over again as if I’m trapped. But when slumber ends and I lie there, for a brief moment none of it ever happened I’ll turn over unable to wipe a smile from my face, I’ll get up and pull the curtains staring out into the sun filled day of possibilities. 

But I don’t open my eyes with a smile anymore and the floor beside my bed is filled with the tissues that caught my tears. the tissues are a harsh reminder that it wasn’t a dream, it all happened and then you left me. Taking with you my smile. But you were kind enough to leave me with that moment every morning where I think it never happened and now that moment is all I have”

[blossomfully]

If someone punches you in the stomach,“ he says, “it’ll hurt whether you were expecting it or not. So if the person you love stops loving you back, you’re going to feel the blow even if you saw it coming.

S.Z. // Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #195 (via blossomfully)

[pluto--rising-blog]

“It’s your birthday tomorrow and I can’t even wish you a happy birthday. I hope you have all the best things in the world and somehow I can find myself wanting to be one of those things for you.”

(via this-sad-story-of-us)

[loveserum-deactivated20191021]

[pluto--rising-blog]

If we don’t end up together and we belong to other people please tell your kids about me. Tell your daughter to be fearless but also build walls around her so guys won’t break her heart like you broke mine. Tell your son to be tender and consistent in every decision, to listen to what his heart says and not what everybody else tells him to, like you did. Tell them that for every person there’s another person who would go through everything just to be with them, like I did for you. Teach them that giving up on the person who sees the world in their eyes just because times are hard will make them drown in regret, like you probably are right now. Most importantly teach them to be fighters and not quitters on that certain person who goes to hell and back, like I did.

(via this-sad-story-of-us)

[badasssupertash]

It was one of those stories, where two young lovers found a love greater than life itself. But in all great stories, what they didn’t realise was life is cruel, unforgiving and not kind. What happens to the star crossed lovers that are no more, that time has taken its tole. That all love burns and stars fade out, and all the great epics turn into tragedies that we try to justify, just to relive the pain. That at the end of this tale these two lovers, love each other too much to admit that there love is dying. Maybe when that love dies, all things good, bright and beautiful would be remembered with them, the way it should be.

Our love has gone cold.//t.c (via badasssupertash)

[misterminola]

[panamaweddings]

Monday 8:27am I woke up with you on my mind. You called me babe last night — my heart is still pounding. Tuesday 10:53pm Today I realized we won’t work. What we are is hurting her. And I think she matters more to me than you do. Wednesday 11:52pm I broke things off with you today. She barely said a word. I’ve never regretted anything more than this. Thursday 4:03pm I shouldn’t have sent that message. You shouldn’t have been so okay with receiving it. Friday 9:57pm I almost messaged you today. I didn’t. Saturday 8:49pm I’m walking around town in search of alcohol. They say that liquor numbs the pain of having a broken heart. I want to put that to the test. Sunday 2:32am I heard you texted a girl you’ve never spoken to before. I wonder if it’s because you’re trying to replace me. I can’t help but wish you weren’t. I thought I was irreplaceable.

a week with you on my mind, c.j.n. (via panamaweddings)

[theawakenrunner]

[irrationalliberal1]

[halloweenmagick]