Thoughts

[itiswhatitismythoughts]

Try something new..... never now if your good or not. A friend inspired me to give story writing a go.

[itiswhatitismythoughts]

Another death it it hurts even more. To the love of my life who has left me. My tribute to you.

To John, my love

We were together for 4 years 2 months 6 days 4 hours until you left. Never did I imagine that those 4 hours were going to be my final hours of hearing your voice. That early morning we said we love each other and our goodbyes and agreed that we would meet at 9am. But that didn’t happened. It was your final goodbye to me.

I miss you so much, that words cannot describe what I am feeling. I keep checking my phone to see if you message me. I message you but you are not messaging me back. I want to know if you have eaten, is your backing hurting, how was your day at work, should I come over to you so you don’t have to drive…

I think about the future plans we made, John I miss and love you so much. My thoughts and memories are all over the place. It seems that everywhere I turn in my house I see you, I remember us playing and you would always get mom to gang up against me…John I love you so much. When I hear the roar of the subie outside my house I still wonder if it is you or my brother, I realize it can’t be you but I still go and check if it is you just in case this is all a dream;

I can hear my baby brother saying it’s farmer Joe coming to check me…Yeap that was your nickname at my home imagine…my thoughts are all a mess…

my love I check my phone and I look at all the videos we have together doing so much stupid stuff. I hear your voice calling me *babe I hear your laughter, I smile, I cry, so much happy memories we had…John, my love you were so kind, willing to help anyone, you made everyone feel so special.

I pray to God that you are at peace now. That you are happy now as you rest. Until we meet again. John, my Pappie, my hunny bunny I love you more than love itself. Your girlfriend Kady.

#bestboyfriend #toakindsoal #mylove RIP🕊

[itiswhatitismythoughts]

Death is something that no one can be prepared for. We don’t want to see our love ones go. We want them to be be with us forever.

Aunt Sue , we are missing you, and still in shock that you have left us. I hope that you were not in pain when you left. Words can’t describe the pain of losing you. We will truly miss your kind and warm heart. You were a soul  that brighten up a room. Your are and still is a great aunt and grandma. I miss you💔❤️ RIP Aunt Sue😘

[itiswhatitismythoughts]

Why panic and stress over things?

Why do we panic and stress over things? There are a lot of things we could be stressing over or panicking.

Why do we stress? We say that a lot of things is stressful like getting to work, completing an assignment, paying bills and so forth. Are they really stressful or is it better to say you are stressed because you don’t have the time to finish it?

I feel that when I get stressed out is because I don’t have time. School gives me panic and stress because I don’t think I will be able to finish my assignments on time or that I will fail. With panicking and being stress it comes at a price for not only me but for others. What do I mean? Your health is what I’m talking about. Some people get so stressed that it makes them sick for example throwing up. For me I feel like throwing up but most of the time I’m panicking where my heart starts to beat really fast ☹️ not a good feeling. Sometimes stress makes me have severe dry skin.... yea very uncomfortable.

I try to control it by doing things. Things that help me somewhat control it is as follows:

Completing majority of my assignments for the week(obviously🙈)

Listen to music

Take breaks such as go eat food, watch TV for a little

Read

Taking naps

Write down a check list

Some of these have help me be less stress and less panicky. Hopefully it can help you. One other thing that can help when these don’t work is medicine.

Thanks for listening to my thoughts.

[itiswhatitismythoughts]

College Term is slowly coming to an end.

This term I have been going okay for me. I am talking three courses which is usually a challenge for me. I usually take two courses because it’s easy to handle. Why am I talking three this term? I want to finish my Bachelors. Finishing quickly requires going out my comfort zone and entering a challenge that I may or may not be able to handle.

The courses that I have taken this term are as follows:

- Network Troubleshooting

- Social Media

- Undergraduate Capstone

You may be thinking that these class don’t seem hard. This may be true to a point. Networking and social media are not hard, and I am able to grasp some of the information. On the other hand, the capstone is a challenge because it requires a lot of time and research. Not only do you have to search for articles but the process of reading these articles can take a long time to read each article. You read everything in the articles... no I don’t I read the basics of it to get and understand of what the article is talking about. Sometimes I get a good understanding for some of the article and some not so much which means I have to go and look for a different article. I am also behind because I signed up late. I have to catch up on a lot assignment which is why I find it hard and tedious.

Furthermore, I find that each week requires different task, and some are easy to do on their own some I have to wait to go to class to understand it. this will happen a lot but I’m staying strong and doing my best.

Next term is my last term and I hope that I am able to get the class I need to graduate.

Thanks for reading my thoughts.

[itiswhatitismythoughts]

Food

Food is life.

Think about. If you have a headache it’s probably because you have not eaten. If your belly growls eat food. If you are stressed eat food. If you are sad eat food.

Life is about eating food and not having regrets about what you eat.

You eat to socialize.

Eat food to eat food because food will never leave you.

[itiswhatitismythoughts]

I’m an Understanding Person

I’m the type of person to try and understand things the best that I can. I analysis things and come up with my own answer or thoughts to it. Yes, I may not have the experience physically, but I can read and try to understand certain situations. I am a good listener and give people different ways of thinking of situations. When people are going though certain situations they tend to think in one way. I, on the other hand, listen and find various of ways of thinking in the situation. When it comes to relationships, I’m the type of person to ask you questions after you tell me your story. I would ask whether or not you want that the rest of your life. I also tend to say If you can’t love yourself how are you going to love your self. I got that saying from Rupaul's drag race and he makes a vital point. I know that for sure people have to love there self before loving someone. Think about it if you go into a relationship and all your doing is trying to love this person but don’t understand it then are you really loving them. Self-love is very important because you know how to encourage yourself what you can do for someone else. I find that being able to understand how people are feeling can help you understand yourself better too. There may be things that have not happened to you but you can have an idea of what it is and hypothetically think of how you would go about it. Just remember, love your self, understand before you say something and use anything as a learning tool.