My name is Charlee, with two 'e's

"I just wanted to be a normal girl. Was that really so much to ask for?" 20 ll Vampire ll Single

[itscrossnow]

“It’s like a ghost town around here.”

[itscrossnow]

[itscrossnow]

[immortalitysucks-blog]

“It’s mostly me; I’m the burden. Everyone else is just everyone else,” he said, chewing on his bottom lip. “And I never said I wasn’t a jerk. If I want to be nice, I’ll be nice, but I don’t. What’s the point anyway? It’s not like anything I do even matters. Nothing lasts forever….” except me he found himself thinking. 

[itscrossnow]

Charlee frowned at him. “That’s a shitty attitude to have and way to look at life.”

[kierensawyerbarnes-blog-blo-blog]

“Yeah, I should. He’s been busy though, so we haven’t really had much time to discuss it. I’m not even sure if he cares, really, but I’d still like his input,” Kieren replied, nodding as Charlee kept talking. “Getting married on the beach was always the plan, I think. Simple is definitely what we want. It’d be pretty to have the trees wrapped with lights if we wanted to do the wedding at sunset.” 

[itscrossnow]

“I think that’s important.” Even if the doctor didn’t actually care he should still have some sort of say in his wedding. When he said what he’d like Charlee nodded in agreement. “That sounds nice. And simple is probably best, given the circumstances.” 

[immortalitysucks-blog]

“I see your point, but I don’t think that I can be that friend. I’m not ‘star-spangled awesome,’ I just don’t want to be the reason someone ends up worse off than when they met me. No one deserves a friend like me. I’ll listen if somebody wants to talk, but that’s it. I’m no one’s burden and no one is mine. You’re right, it’s not all about me, which is why you have every right to not like me. That’s your prerogative .”

[itscrossnow]

“Is that how you really see people, as burdens?” Her lips curled in disgust. “And I never said I wanted to be your friend. I’m saying you’re a jerk for acting that way and you should be more considerate to others.”

[yennefahs]

This is what happens when you don’t have a tv, any furniture or a functioning kitchen

[immortalitysucks-blog]

Murphy blew out a long breath, tightening his jaw. He didn’t want to explain himself. “Yeah, I will…” He mumbled as she walked away and then against his better judgement, “Hey! Wait!” He called out to her and took a step forward, “Charlee. I never said other people shouldn’t have friends. I just don’t think that I should have them and I have my own reasons for that, but friends can be great. I had a few when I was a child; they were great, but things changed. I changed. It’s a personal choice for me, but you should have friends if you want them. I know it can be hard to find them sometimes though.” 

[itscrossnow]

Charlee stopped when he called. Mostly out of politeness and not actually wanted to. When he “explained” himself she sort of scrunched her nose at him. “And who are you to brush off people like that? What makes you so star spangled awesome that you don’t need anybody and just want to tell people fuck you? You know, it’s not all about you. Maybe people want to be friends with you because they need a friend.” She clipped at him.

[kierensawyerbarnes-blog-blo-blog]

“What I have is two people who want to get married, a lovely maid of honor, and an overzealous decorator who wants doves at the wedding. I haven’t really even thought about all the little decisions like color scheme or food or flowers or anything really.” 

[itscrossnow]

Charlee sighed. “Well, you should probably talk to your future husband about colors first....” She may not have actually planned a wedding before, but she knew that was important. “Not to be cliche, but in an effort to keep things simple I suggest a beach themed wedding.” The island may be for treatment but a lot of people would kill for a venue like this.

[kierensawyerbarnes-blog-blo-blog]

“Wedding planning sucks. What have I missed?” 

[itscrossnow]

“I don’t know. What do you have so far again?”

[itscrossnow]

[immortalitysucks-blog]

His brows knitted slightly at the name Eden. He wondered absently who that was and what they were like, but he didn’t say anything. “It’s a good thing I don’t need your approval on my life choices then,” Murphy said. He’d never admit it out loud, but he did miss having friends, but having friends hurt him and it would hurt them. It was better like this. 

“Friends are complicated, they’re messy, and they’re just not something I need,” he told her. “I’m complicated and messy enough on my own.” 

[itscrossnow]

Charlee frowned at Murphy when he said he didn’t want friends. When she was a human, and back in her hometown, she would have given anything to have friends. And he was just like ‘fuck it. I don’t need them’. It made her mad.

“Well, you have fun with that then.” She clipped and turned around in a huff to leave.

[immortalitysucks-blog]

“I’ll admit that it’s not for everyone, but I’m not everyone. The point is that I’ll always be losing the people that I care about, so I don’t want to care at all. That’s all you need to know,” He told her. Immortality really did suck, but it was more complicated than that. He’d wanted to die at 11-years-old because he didn’t deserve to live, because his parents were dead and he beared the burden of their deaths. The irony of it all was that he couldn’t. 

After years under the careful scrutiny of doctors and nurses in the mental hospital, who had him pegged as a suicide risk: he actually managed to find a way to try it and he succeeded, or so he thought….and the doctors’ thought. Waking up with autopsy stitching is scary, he still had the scar. He had a million scars from over a dozen attempts. All successful until he woke up. He didn’t want to lose anyone else and he didn’t need people to know this story. 

It was his alone. His burden. His nightmare. He intended to keep it that way. 

[itscrossnow]

“You sound like Eden.” Charlee mummered. More to herself than anything. He doesn’t know who Eden is so probably wouldn’t get it, but his attitude reminded him a lot of the demure vampire and his maker’s “sister”. Only she had more tact and manners.

“Well, I still think that’s stupid.” Charlee told him. “Maybe you wouldn’t be such a grouch if you had friends. Just sayin’.”

[immortalitysucks-blog]

“I deserve that,” he said. “First day, new place. I didn’t handle it well, but I don’t let people get close to me. I don’t form attachments or answer personal questions. Antisocial, they called it.” He shrugged. “I just think it’s better that way. It’s better for people not to like me.” Murphy raised his eyebrow when she introduced herself. He took a breath before speaking again, “Murphy.” 

[itscrossnow]

“Well that’s just stupid.” Charlee said, sort of without thinking. “What’s the point of going through the motions if you’re just gonna go through the motions and be alone.” She had been alone a lot. When she was a kid most of her family ignored her until they needed her for something, or she needed to be reprimanded, or her brothers wanted to torment her. “I’m sorry but your life plan is stupid.”

[itscrossnow]

[immortalitysucks-blog]

“I don’t mind your bad mood one bit. It’s refreshing actually,” he told her. “People who are happy all the time are boring people.” He gave her a small sly smile. 

[itscrossnow]

“Well, people who are jerks all the time are rude.” Charlee replied. He didn’t know her so he really couldn’t comment on liking her bad mood or not. For someone that didn’t know her, and was being a jerk earlier, he was sure being familiar. “I’m Charlee, by the way.”

[itscrossnow]

“No. I really don’t want to talk about it.”

[immortalitysucks-blog]

“We’re in the same boat then. You know, no one says you have to talk about it.“

[itscrossnow]

‘Oh. It’s that guy’

“I’m just having a bad day, that’s all.” With spring here on the island it was getting hotter. Which meant she had to spend most days cooped up indoors, or with very minimal outside time and be miserable. “Everyone expects me to be Susie Sparkle Sunshine and act likes it’s a travesty when I’m in a bad mood.”