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almost home
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official daine visual archive
EXPECTATIONS
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art blog(derogatory)
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$LAYYYTER
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The Stonewall Inn
KIROKAZE
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@jakub-beralski
Fool’s Errand
"It's a fool's errand." But a fool's errand was never so sincere. Climb that gargantuan mountain with naught but the clothes on your back. Cross those vast plains without a pause. Swim along the turbulent river, for it may lead to the Spring of Eden. By considering your steps boundless, discover where a flourishing mind can lead when guided by wandering feet and unnamed limits.
An Imagined Forest
The crowd of trees and shrubbery and bushes uproots itself and dances to a soundless groove. The splendorous landscape, the immersive soundscape: they're already engaging. But when one walks along the forest path with a healthy dose of imagination, life can feel more alive than ever before. Footsteps echo: the crunch of dirt that might lead to a fairy's grove. Riverwater trickles down rocks and logs and tickles the eardrums like the tapping fingers of a playful drummer. The mind's eye can invigorate the simple scene with a routine practice of perfect perception and ambitious imagination.
Six Strings
Vibrations rebound off the walls: richochet. This makeshift echo chamber —cheap carpet, stained mattress, leaky faucets— holds a boundless symphony. The six strings are seduced to synthesize a universe of sound. Silent passersbiy with averted gazes when he sits on the edge of the sidewalk: a silent expectation to divert attention. But an extraordinary soundscape radiates from this solitary soul when he brings the strings out to the streets.
Everything is...
Everything is as elementary as you elect to make it. Everything is as deep as you decide to dive.
A New “Order”
This cement, these bricks: they seem odd to me. They are the atoms of stones and sand and sediment, cleft apart and glued together in patchwork. They represent a rough approximation of the resplendent order of the natural world. Machines and mechanistic manipulations, though uniquely utilitarian, forget the aesthetic efficiency of a scheme that has permeated the sum of sensation for centuries upon centuries. ...Da Vinci studied flight by drawing birds.
Opened
The bellicose beast within was shattered apart by the beauty of existence. An immensity of experience arose and crashed upon animosity like a diluvian flood.
A better, more positive Tumblr
Since its founding in 2007, Tumblr has always been a place for wide open, creative self-expression at the heart of community and culture. To borrow from our founder David Karp, we’re proud to have inspired a generation of artists, writers, creators, curators, and crusaders to redefine our culture and to help empower individuality.
Over the past several months, and inspired by our storied past, we’ve given serious thought to who we want to be to our community moving forward and have been hard at work laying the foundation for a better Tumblr. We’ve realized that in order to continue to fulfill our promise and place in culture, especially as it evolves, we must change. Some of that change began with fostering more constructive dialogue among our community members. Today, we’re taking another step by no longer allowing adult content, including explicit sexual content and nudity (with some exceptions).
Let’s first be unequivocal about something that should not be confused with today’s policy change: posting anything that is harmful to minors, including child pornography, is abhorrent and has no place in our community. We’ve always had and always will have a zero tolerance policy for this type of content. To this end, we continuously invest in the enforcement of this policy, including industry-standard machine monitoring, a growing team of human moderators, and user tools that make it easy to report abuse. We also closely partner with the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and the Internet Watch Foundation, two invaluable organizations at the forefront of protecting our children from abuse, and through these partnerships we report violations of this policy to law enforcement authorities. We can never prevent all bad actors from attempting to abuse our platform, but we make it our highest priority to keep the community as safe as possible.
So what is changing?
Posts that contain adult content will no longer be allowed on Tumblr, and we’ve updated our Community Guidelines to reflect this policy change. We recognize Tumblr is also a place to speak freely about topics like art, sex positivity, your relationships, your sexuality, and your personal journey. We want to make sure that we continue to foster this type of diversity of expression in the community, so our new policy strives to strike a balance.
Why are we doing this?
It is our continued, humble aspiration that Tumblr be a safe place for creative expression, self-discovery, and a deep sense of community. As Tumblr continues to grow and evolve, and our understanding of our impact on our world becomes clearer, we have a responsibility to consider that impact across different age groups, demographics, cultures, and mindsets. We spent considerable time weighing the pros and cons of expression in the community that includes adult content. In doing so, it became clear that without this content we have the opportunity to create a place where more people feel comfortable expressing themselves.
Bottom line: There are no shortage of sites on the internet that feature adult content. We will leave it to them and focus our efforts on creating the most welcoming environment possible for our community.
So what’s next?
Starting December 17, 2018, we will begin enforcing this new policy. Community members with content that is no longer permitted on Tumblr will get a heads up from us in advance and steps they can take to appeal or preserve their content outside the community if they so choose. All changes won’t happen overnight as something of this complexity takes time.
Another thing, filtering this type of content versus say, a political protest with nudity or the statue of David, is not simple at scale. We’re relying on automated tools to identify adult content and humans to help train and keep our systems in check. We know there will be mistakes, but we’ve done our best to create and enforce a policy that acknowledges the breadth of expression we see in the community.
Most importantly, we’re going to be as transparent as possible with you about the decisions we’re making and resources available to you, including more detailed information, product enhancements, and more content moderators to interface directly with the community and content.
Like you, we love Tumblr and what it’s come to mean for millions of people around the world. Our actions are out of love and hope for our community. We won’t always get this right, especially in the beginning, but we are determined to make your experience a positive one.
Jeff D’Onofrio CEO
Well, living in the United States, I’ve gotten fairly used to having expression silenced and individuality vilified. I thought that Tumblr would be free from such a bias and would continue to provide a safe haven for free artistic expression and exploration of individuality, but I guess I was wrong.
This is an unfortunate turn of events. I haven’t posted on Tumblr in a bit, but when I saw this I couldn’t help but say something. Sexuality is a critical part of the human experience, and here on Tumblr I have seen beautiful communities form around the exploration of body positivity, nudity, sex, and sexuality, complete with a wonderful atmosphere of openness and impressive artistic expression and creativity. If Tumblr censors “adult content,” then many people will lose an outlet for sexual expression and exploration, and creative expression of the human experience will suffer. This is very lamentable.
There are plenty of contradictions in this message. “We’re proud to have inspired a generation of artists, writers, creators, curators, and crusaders to redefine our culture and to help empower individuality,” but now a significant portion of those artists, writers, creators, curators, and crusaders may be shut out and put down. “We want to make sure that we continue to foster this type of diversity of expression in the community,” is akin to telling a musician to express themselves as much as possible but then taking away their instrument, or encouraging a writer to make themselves heard but forgetting to give them a pen or pencil. “Without this content we have the opportunity to create a place where more people feel comfortable expressing themselves” seems to be missing any shred of truth; to use another analogy, this is akin to saying that you want to ban poems so that people can feel more comfortable expressing themselves.
And then there’s the statement that really gets me. “Bottom line: there are no shortage of sites on the internet that feature adult content.” Yes, there’s no shortage of sites online where I could search “Barely Legal Blond Gets Pounded By Monster Black Cock” and get hundreds of results, but Tumblr seems to forget that not everyone is interested in that. Some people would prefer to see pictures and videos that were made with artistic expression in mind and that express not only lust and primal sexuality but also sensuality and love-filled intimacy. Yes, I could send my long-distance girlfriend a link to a porno where some schoolgirl is being pounded by a teacher so she can get an A in her class, but that’s hardly as thoughtful and enticing as a beautifully-framed video or picture through Tumblr that captures not only sex but also love and compassion, and which could lead her to a new blog where there is a community of people talking openly about sexuality and sharing relevant thoughts and experiences. And besides that, you don’t see as many artists expressing themselves on average internet adult content as you do on Tumblr, and I would hate to see this haven for free artistic expression put down.
Child pornography? Yes, that’s abhorrent. But I see no reason to completely remove all of sexual expression from Tumblr. You have millions of loyal members: why not start a campaign and encourage everyone to rat out child pornography? I’m sure that your members, who know the ins and outs of the realm of Tumblr can easily further that goal.
You’re trying to kill a rat with a demolition team, and you’re tearing the house down in the process. Listen to your members and reconsider how you’re approaching this, for your own sake and also for the sake of artists and individuals around the world.
The air all around
us is the most copious
hallucinogen.
—Red Leaf Haiku by © John Clark Helzer
Rid yourself of the illusion that you always have to be doing something.
A Story of Seeking Warmth...
The frozen Arctic wastes were cold and white. That endless nothing streched from near to far— a vapid vastness reaching past our sight. ...For friends, we only had the nightly stars. A night spent hiding from the howling wind gave birth to new ideas for warmth...and fun. At first just hesitation: winks, a hint. And then our hands were hunting pleasure und- -er walls of cloth. And four together found desire: reckless lust behind a blush. The night then found salacious sounds, and dark- -ness hid the scene of flesh exploring flesh. Thus, miles apart from any sight: we found new comfort, joy in something warm and white.
A Strange Cycle:
So that even after feeling great for being complimented and being assured of our unique capability for appearance, charm, talent, dedication, vigor, subtlety, enthusiasm, gentleness, or anything else, we are still afraid to use our words to share that same joy with others (particularly those who most desire and need it).
Reinvigorating a Dimming Memory
It's been too long since I've written here, or, for that matter, anywhere.
Here's a toast to the forgetfulness inherent to my humanity: that which leads me to forget just how beautiful free-flowing words are. And here's a "thank you" to music: the enlightening beats and chords and walls of sound that remind me why I picked up my six strings in the first place. And an offed hat to those people that have bothered to say "that's incredible" or even just "wow," for they remind me that my story and existence is not just for me, but for everyone else as well.
As immersive as this life can be, what makes it divine and beautiful is not that it's fun, but that nothing you do is in a vaccuum.
Pursue your limitlessly expressive words, and your infinitely explorative notes, and your traveled, choreographed footsteps, and your inimitably powerful eyes, and your endlessly vibrant colors, and your uniquely enlightening perspectives, and your secretly immersive euphorias, and your aesthetically magnificent designs, and your perfectly precise constructs.
These are the multifarious and intimate hues which color the simple base and outline of your live.
...Your mind, heart, body, and soul all seek exploration. Do not feed them with routine or mundanity.
Hi.
I’m your kid’s teacher, and I would take a bullet for your child. But I wish you wouldn’t ask me to.
.
We had an intruder drill today.
.
I have shepherded children through a lot of intruder drills. I have also, on one memorable occasion, shepherded children through a non-drill. When I was a children’s librarian in a rough suburb, armed men got into a fight in the alley behind our building. We ushered all of the kids - most of whom were unattended - into the basement while we waited for the police.
During intruder drills, some children - from five-year-olds all the way to high school kids - get visibly upset. At one school, the intruder drill included administrators running down the hallways, screaming and banging on lockers to simulate the “real thing.” Kids cry. Kindergartners wet themselves. Teenagers laugh, nudging each other, even as the blood drains from their faces.
Other children handle intruder drills matter-of-factly. “Would the guy be able to shoot us through the door?” they ask, the same way they’d ask a question about their math homework. In some ways, this is worse than the kids who cry. To be so young and so accustomed to fear that these drills seem routine.
And then there are the teachers. There is no way, huddling in a corner with your students, ducking out of view of the windows and doors, to avoid thinking about what happens when it’s not a drill.
.
People really hate teachers. I don’t take it personally. It actually makes a lot of sense: what other group of professionals do we know so well? How many doctors have you had? How many plumbers? How many secretaries?
Over the course of my public school education, I had at least fifty teachers for at least a year each. So of course some of them were bad. You take fifty people from any profession, and a couple of them are going to be terrible at their job.
So I had a couple of teachers who were terrible, and a few teachers who were amazing, inspirational figures - the kinds of teachers they make movies about.
And then I had a lot of teachers who did a good job. They came to school every day and worked hard. They’d planned our lessons and they graded our papers. I learned what I was supposed to, more or less, even if it wasn’t the most incredible learning experience of my life.
Most teachers fall into that category. I’m sure I do.
Looking at it from the other side, though, I see something that I didn’t know when I was a kid.
Those workhorse teachers who tried, who failed sometimes and sometimes succeeded, who showed up every day and did their jobs: those teachers loved us.
.
Of course you can never know what you’ll do in the event. That’s what they always say. In the event of an intruder, a fire, a tornado.
You can never know until you know.
But part of what’s so terrifying, so upsetting about an intruder drill as a teacher, is that on some level you do know. You don’t aspire to martyrdom; you’ve never wanted to be a hero. You go home every night to a family that loves you, and you intend to spend the next fifty years with them. You will do everything in your power to hide yourself in that office along with your kids.
But if you can’t.
If you can’t.
.
When people tell me about why they oppose gun control, I can’t hear it anymore.
I’m from a part of the country where everybody has guns. I used to be really moderate about this stuff, and I am not anymore.
I can’t be.
Every day, I go to work in a building that contains hundreds of children. Every single one of those kids, including every kid that makes me crazy, is a joy and a blessing. They make their parents’ lives meaningful. They make my life meaningful. They are the reason I go to work in the morning, and the reason I worry and plan when I come home.
Parents usually know a handful of kids who are the most wonderful creatures on the planet. I know a couple thousand. It is an incredible privilege, and it is also terrifying. The world is big and scary, and I love so many small people who must go out into it.
So when adults tell me, “I have the right to own a gun”, all I can hear is: “My right to own a gun outweighs your students’ right to be alive.” All I can hear is: “My right to own a gun is more important than kindergarteners feeling safe at school.” All I can hear is: “Mine. Mine. Mine.”
.
When you are sitting there hiding in the corner of your classroom, you know.
The alternative would be unthinkable.
.
We live in a country where children are acceptable casualties. Every time someone tells me about the second amendment I want to give them a history lesson. I also want to ask them: in what universe is your right to walk into a Wal-Mart to buy a gun more important than the lives of hundreds of children shot dead in their schools?
Parents send their kids to school every day with this shadow. Teachers live with the shadow. We work alongside it. We plan for it. In the event.
In the event, parents know that their children’s teachers will do everything in their power to keep them safe. We plan for it.
And when those plans don’t work, teachers die protecting their students.
We love your children. That’s why we’re here. Some of us love the subject we teach, too, and that’s important, but all of us love your kids.
The alternative would be unthinkable.
.
When you are waiting, waiting, waiting for the voice to come on over the PA, telling you that the drill is over, you look at the apprehensive faces around you. You didn’t grow up like this. You never once hid with your teacher in a corner, wondering if a gunman was just around the corner. It is astonishing to you that anyone tolerates this.
And the kids are nervous, but they are all looking to you. You’re their teacher.
They know what you didn’t know, back when you were a kid, back before Columbine. They know that you love them. They know you will keep them safe.
You’re their teacher.
.
If you are a parent who thinks it’s totally reasonable for civilians to have a house full of deadly weapons, and who accepts the blood of innocent people in exchange for that right, it doesn’t change anything for me. I will love your kid. I will treat you, and your child, the same way I treat everyone else: with all of the respect and the care that is in me.
In the event, I will do everything in my power to keep your child safe.
I just want you to know what you are asking me to do.
In the UK we seriously reformed gun ownership because of one school massacre.
One.
Dunblane Primary School. 16 children, one teacher and the shooter himself. March, 13th, 1996.
Three years after I was born.
I know that the risks and horrors are immense in this world, where crime can happen to anyone and those who live in places where it’s most common are the ones who adapt to it best. But we had one school shooting that remains the deadliest mass shooting in UK history and we did something about it.
If a page in the Bible isn’t worth a life, then a bullet in the chamber of a gun registered in your name isn’t worth one either.
It isn’t worth a dozen. It isn’t worth 17 or 20 or 50 or 100.
Nothing is worth more than a life and everything should be sacrificed for the life of children and teenagers who should be able to go to school and learn in safety, not fear for a mass murderer to be wandering their school halls.
Please.
This isn’t a fear children should know. It’s not a fear their teachers should know.
Guns don’t save lives, they take them.
Cerberus suggests a sinful aesthetic: salacious suggestions amid incinerative incitations, screaming "Anarchy!" in shallow-minded tones. Oh, the frothing fiends that our forefathers feared: they've emerged from the shadows and dropped their masks and now eagerly rush towards devious tasks. Bullets let fly: more small, bloodied hands lay still on the pavement. Grand masses of currency fuel isolation and fuel the insurgency. And as growing pains are injected into our weakening lifeblood, we take on more willingly our addiction to anger: an anarchic scream to drown out the pained scream. All tortures end in acquittal or death. And the decision draws near as to which end we'll get.
Месте
Это не Россия. Здесь не русские горола. Здесь нет русских домов. Здесь не русские люди. Однако, Если ты не думаеш Я русский шпион, Это может быт мое место: Как Россия, Как Америка…
River of Crocodile Tears
Does the I die when I fall asleep am I still dreaming while awake In possession of an eternal soul or reborn with every breath I take Imprisoned within this tired body ever struggling to be set free Random thoughts and endless noise who is the stranger I think is me Life appears to be without meaning clever words have lost their rhyme Overwhelmed by fear and confusion convicted by me, serving my time Is this an illusion, is anything real still no answers all these years Alone and lonely, a little sad crying a river of crocodile tears
Outstanding.
