coming clean @jane-doe-eyed - Tumblr Blog

They terrorized me. I disassociated. Now I don't associate with them so I can be present with myself. I'm willing to let myself feel. It's scary but I'm brave

fuck my parents with a rusty pole

im so fuckinmad and drunk and i fuck my parents they were asses that shouldnt have ha d kids. im so glad to get this off my drunkinn chest. my momm tried to kill me. she told me. she told me she left me for dead as an infant, she told she this when i was a young child as she smirked and giggled. i’m still furious. i’m 38 and this was 25 years ago she told me and had been occuring regularly for those 13 years up to that point this conversation happened. im 38 and furious stilll

fuck this world and all its stupid shite

tomorrow im going sober and abstinent from food. i realize i cannnot substain frombinging on food while i continue to be A drunk a hole. i love youu all. fellow drunkie or food adict. if you see tis i love you. and yaaas i am drunk

cloachea

Love love love. all ya need is love. eveybody. all ya need is love. love. love is all ya need

felt cute. might delete later. xoxoxo666xxx

I'm not trying to be lazy. These overwhelming thoughts telling me I'm a piece of shit who deserves to be dead already is just really

Dad only complimented me if I lost weight. Mom never complimented regardless. I stayed under 800 cal yesterday. Felt empowering. After being binge free for almost 30 days. Saw my weight this morning dip on scale and it was invigorating. I want that feeling every morning. Skipping lunch and laying out exactly how many ibuprofen would be lethal let me choose to be here today and in what form. I get high on it like I did cutting. I want control over my body

oliviafitmomof3

Going camping this weekend. Usually always get bored and binge like a mofo. Not this time. I loved everything I'm planning on eating already and bringing tons of thinspo books and mindfulness for borderline personality disorder workbook. Will journal and remember, food is not comfort.

Mood; morose. Food cravings high. Stuck to calorie goal today. Physically still sore and recovering from bender on weekend. Today was first day clean eating since cook out party. Takes me awhile to correct after going off the rails. Day 1 achievement unlocked. I can do this. 40 day binge free with restriction. Throwing down my gauntlet

#personal challenge

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Lame

Go away

Hunger pain

Come again

Another day

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