to my december, 2025 jane <3
Hey. How have you been? Have you been eating well? Have you been sleeping well? I hope you wake up every morning just so happy to exist. I am sorry if I had not lived up to your expectations, but it was hard. But you know what? Thinking of you gives me the strength to keep going, so thank you for existing.
2024 was a crazy year, wasn't it? We loved, we hustled, got burnt out, got back from it, found warmth in people, said goodbye to the places that held so many memories, sometimes wished for the world to just pause, we fell out of love, did a trust fall with God, studied hard, gave our best on the day of ‘the exam,’ got hurt nevertheless, but most of all, we endured. There were also so many things we learned, like letting go of people gracefully or just waiting for the morning rays to wash the grief of yesterday. I am proud of you, so much. Just remember that you do not need to hear stuff like ‘I am proud of you’ or ‘You did well’ or ‘It’s going to be okay’ from others for those things to be true. Your value does not depend on what others say or think about you. Hmm?
I wonder what crazy stuff would have happened in 2025. Did you ace those interviews? Did you get into the university of your dreams? Did you finally find the people who’d cherish you the same way you cherish them? Did you manage to get out? I am curious to know everything, but, no matter what had gone well or not, you got me, always. I’ll be right there with you, through all the highs and lows—and so will God. I really hope you are shining wherever you are right now. I hope your heart aches a bit less when you think of everything. I wish nothing but the best of the best for you. You know why? because you deserve it. all of it.
I don’t know why I am writing you this letter, but I felt like it. To say that I am sorry and that I am proud of you. I want you to know that you are the greatest treasure you’d ever have, and do not compromise your needs for anyone. ‘Anyone’: not your parents, not your siblings, not anyone. Give yourself the love you earn for, tell yourself the things you want to hear from others. After all, that’s the greatest lesson we learned in 2024, right? To stand by ourselves.
I love you. always. xoxo.