I’ve worked at the Frozen Kuhsterd food truck like I said I always wanted to; social media work, cashiering, line working, and driving the truck. I’ve gone from working Off the Grid in Pittsburg to catering a Yacht Club. I’ve gotten drunk with my bosses, met some interesting people, and even eaten some pretty amazing food for free. I can tell you everything about frozen custard and how it differs from every type of frozen treat there is.
From there, I worked for a start-up company at Civic Center called Earnest, a student loan refinancer/private lender working in client support. I’ve met some amazing people there as well and maybe even some best friends. I basically answered emails everyday and it’s helped me understand my own finances and given me some legit experience in the support industry.
Right now I work at Twitter as a social media analyst. Looking at my LinkedIn, you probably knew that, but in reality, all I do is look at nudes and ISIS execution videos and label them “not safe for advertising.” It’s been pretty surreal. I’ve seen and reviewed Twitter accounts from Korea to San Jose and I’ve basically met so many people through their profiles; I’ve seen the connections they’ve made with others, the adventures they’ve been on, and I’ve seen a lot of insane cuisines. The people here at Twitter all come from different backgrounds but regardless I’ve made brothers here as well. All in all, the money has been good everywhere I go and it’s only getting better, so I’m not a bitch to throw some.
Ever since what happened about a year ago, I’ve been more open-minded and optimistic like you always wanted me to be. I’m sorry I was so introverted, but I feel like your extroverted aura just tired me out and when we called it quits, I was able to build and reevaluate myself into something you’ve wanted me to be.
My urine has traces of THC and I’ve gotten on a lot of high adventures and it was pretty funny. I can name a few good bars and some cool hangout spots besides my house. I know where great SF views are, where to get a good cocktail, where to get some food on that Anthony Bourdain level, and which dispensary has Gold Drop. I’m still very lowkey about everything and you know how I am. I keep my circle small but for those who know me, they really know me. I keep a knife in my pocket.
I’m sorry I never gave you closure but to be honest, I just didn’t want to fight or talk anymore. I honestly just wanted to run away and I did it like a deadbeat. I knew what I wanted and it was to not fight anymore and to not be with you anymore and I wanted it to be as simple as that. You were right; I wanted the easy and selfish way out, and I accepted that, and I ran away without an explanation. And I’m still not ready to talk about it. Those last two months we had; they were so distant, so up in the air, so cold, I hung out with friends more than you, and I saw you more as a friend than a lover, and I hated that so much because we used to be more. It just felt like nothing was happening and I honestly had no plans or outings for us because I ran dry and I was bored myself and I wanted to fix it, but at the same time, I was pretty done of all the arguing and the same fights. I take too much responsibility on myself though; it was your fault too. You were going through a lot of things yourself and you forgot about us. I know you had no choice but still. It wasn’t us but the circumstances and situations around us that really warped things. The thing I hated the most was when you told me I didn’t do enough for us; it was like a broken record and I didn’t want to deal with that God damn phrase ever again that I told you to get out of the jeep and you slammed the door so hard and I just hung out with my friend and vented out to him instead.
I quit vaping. And I still check up on you. Instagram, Facebook, Twitter (you started tweeting more and I saw that), and Tumblr. You honestly thought you can escape me, come on bro, we were together for five years. Of course, I wonder about you. He sounds like a good guy and I’m happy for you.
I met someone and she’s the best. Unlike me before, I learned my mistakes from us and made sure to never be that person again, so thank you for opening my eyes and expanding my horizon. I love her and she loves me. She got me into matcha and cats (like you wanted me to) and Korean face products and Asian dessert cafes, and she always has plans whenever we hang out so we’re always going places and eating a lot. I got fat, okay? Sue me, I work an office job and people honestly don’t know how much standing does for your body; I basically gained 15 pounds but I’ve built a lot of muscle to make up for it. We also nap and sleep a lot; she started snoring cause of me, and that’s just cute. I always do my best to be genuine and real with her and surprise her a lot and she takes real care of me.
I really don’t like making posts on Tumblr because it’s so lame. I’m 23 for God’s sake. I don’t need to share myself with everyone on a public feed and pretend it’s a personal diary, but I’m doing this for you, okay? Please forget about me, that old me is pretty much gone. I’ve been better and you wouldn’t honestly recognize me, but I still talk a lot of shit.
You think I didn’t care those 5 years when I did and I do still care about you. I hope he’s everything I wasn’t and I hope you travel a lot more and have great memories too. You also tweet a lot of inappropriate stuff and it’s my job to label profiles so let’s say your account was probably reviewed by someone on my team so take this as a lesson for your future when employers do background checks on you. I went on your Spotify and you absolutely have no trace of 21 Savage on there, so fix that.
I may not be ready to talk about our stuff still with you, but I still want you to know I’m there; as a last measure, as a DD, as a short conversation, and as whatever as long as I’m not busy. I know it’s not much and it’s pretty offensive for me to say that because we were so much more back then but that’s all I’m offering. I know you remember my phone number, so don’t be afraid to text me an empty threat or a hi. This is the end of my post now.
