Jellybean Thyme @jellybeansandthyme - Tumblr Blog

wittacism241253-deactivated2016

It’s essay writing season for tons of students!

After being a college writing tutor for over a year, I thought I would share my advice with all you awesome people on tumblr. This is how I write essays, but if you’ve got more tips, feel free to add them below.

Happy writing. You can do it!

englishmajorhumor

This is actually brilliant.

tschaikovsky

barelyup

Oh my god ❤️

lilbluemoo

Absolutely love this

caffeinatedlanddetective

Wow.

Please watch this.

sobeitjayt

Suck my tongue when we kissin

jellybeansandthyme

Ew. No. Not a tongue fan.

Suck and bite my LIP please.

Been having fun with PicsArt lately lol

#chubby girl #thick women #thick thighs

thereddestglass

So I had to return a book to the library today and I came straight from the horse farm. I went to the front desk because it was an item on loan from another library and I wasn’t sure if it had to be checked in differently. The librarian said no, it could get returned in the normal slot but she could take it and check it in right away.

It was only when I got back to the car that I realized I had walked into the library covered in dirt from head to toe and handed back a book about grave robbing.

geobrarian

I guarantee you that was the highlight of their day.

needygooose

I was cleaning out my computer and I found a bunch of screenshots of text posts from 2013-2014. The golden age of tumblr.

I take no credit for these posts.

quietlyrebelling

God they don’t make em like this anymore

oysters-aint-for-me

has anyone ever had the problem where you literally never want to do anything that you cannot reap benefits from immediately

like maybe I’m hungry but everything I have in the house at the moment would take 10+ minutes to prepare so I just……put off making the food for WAY longer than it would have taken to prepare the food when I first got hungry

Or i want to order some necessary thing online but the website says it will take a week to get here and i’m like “oh well fuck that” so I put off ordering it for like a week

Or if im like “I should clean my room because I like when it’s clean” but I know it’ll take me a couple hours so I don’t do it for like six months

It’s like there are only two times for me: right this instant and The Entire Rest Of The Future.

strawberryoverlord

That’s executive disfunction baby

kaijuno

Palpatine looks like an evil Colin Mochrie

ferventvervet

but why would you hide this in the tags though

jellybeansandthyme

They need to do a comedy movie together with palpatine as his evil twin that shows up and fucks Collins life up

incorrectmarauderquotes

Sirius: Dueling is definitely in my top 5 favorite activities.

James: What are the others?

Sirius: Eating things. Shutting stupid people down verbally. Bubble baths. Masturbating.

ahedderick

Livestock drama

“Let’s put pool noodles on the goat’s horns!” says a teenager.

“Why would you, ” I begin, but they have already stampeded out of the house. I shrug.

It turns out that when someone puts pool noodles on a goat’s horns, the goat doesn’t really care. They’re very light, after all, and she can’t see them. You know who cares? Who cares a LOT?

the HORSE. Hero took one look at Nutmeg wearing pool noodles and ran away. You know who doesn’t want to be left alone, ever? Nutmeg. Who went trotting after Hero because he was leaving her.

Hero, seeing that the eldritch abomination was after him, picked up speed. Nutmeg went into a full run. My kids started chasing Nutmeg to get the pool noodles off her, but could not catch her, because she’s surprisingly fast. The dogs were bringing up the rear, just happy to be going for a pleasant run. Hero was in a panic, leading a parade that he did not want.

This all resolved. One noodle feel off; the kids eventually cornered Nutmeg and removed the other one. Just - a day at a farm, I guess.

10/02/20

theevenprime

This feels like a @glumshoe story.

benditlikekorra

Water. Earth. Fire. Air. [x][x]

motelmoans

fuck the thought of living together and having full access to your holes? just finger you casually while we watch movies, press my tongue against ur cunt just because I caught u looking extra pretty, keeping you stretched on my cock while we have company over, yes please god I'd use u so well and so often if I had full access to you

spaceyjules-deactivated20180305

If you call pedophilia a kink please unfollow me and never talk to me again

spaceyjules-deactivated20180305

Isn’t it disgusting that 23 people just unfollowed me

clarknokent

Unfollow me too

gothhabiba

this goes double if you call paedophilia a disability. unfollow me twice

closet-keys

and if you call pedophilia an “orientation” or in any way compare it to being LGBP+ you can unfollow, delete your blog, and set yourself on fire.

peachypastel

I just lost 50 followers.. bye

katiemcgrxth

clearing out the trash

bway-grimes

GO ON AND S M A S H THAT UNFOLLOW BUTTON

moonedknights

BUHBYE U McNASTIES

bogleech

I’ve seen this circulating forever and genuinely thought “no way do I have any of them following me” until this week when it turned out I had all these fuckin “MAP” (pedophile) followers sad to find out I’m an “anti” (normal person) Please leave and also please get guinea worm.