Mike Driver
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@jensengirl83
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I write for the SPN fandom, Jensen RPF, and will now be slowly dipping my toe into writing for Beau Arlen and Soldier Boy. Requests are Patreon only. Any questions, just send me an ask or a message anytime! Happy reading!
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Summary- Y/N has been Jensen’s personal assistant since the beginning of Supernatural. Now that the show has ended and he has moved on to play the infamous Soldier Boy, Y/N has decided to follow him to the set of The Boys. With his recent divorce and significant life changes, Jensen is happy to have his best friend by his side on his new show. Y/N has been with him for a long time, seen and been with him through everything. But, what will happen when new experiences change their relationship, and possible feelings are discovered?
Each chapter will be warned accordingly
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Epilogue
This is finally complete!!
You'll Acompany Me- Epilogue
Jensen X reader
Word Count-2500
Warnings- FLUFF
“I can’t believe it,” Y/N whispered, wrapped tight in Jensen’s arms.
“Can’t believe what, honey?” he asked, leaning down to kiss her forehead.
“That we’re actually married.”
“Well, it’s a little late to back out now,” he chuckled as she playfully slapped his arm.
They were standing in their kitchen, having a moment alone after all the pictures were taken, and they were waiting for the yard to finish being set up for the reception and their introduction as husband and wife.
“Sorry to burst your bubble, but you’re stuck with me now,” she smiled, leaning her head against his chest.
“That’s the second best thing I’ve heard all day,” he replied seriously.
“What’s the first?”
“When you said I do,” he stated, his face showing no sign of joking.
“I love you,” she sighed happily, squeezing his middle.
“I love you more.”
No other words needed to be said as they held each other. The feeling of happiness and peace between them was enough to negate anything else needing to be spoken. They both had been waiting for this moment for what seemed like forever, and now that it was there, they were content just being with each other.
“Y’all ready?” Jared asked, poking his head around the corner into the kitchen.
“Never been more ready for anything in my life,” Jensen said, stepping back and taking her hand.
“Wow. You’re extra sappy today,” she laughed.
“Not sappy, darlin’. Just the happiest I’ve ever been.”
“See, she’s right,” Jared chuckled, “Extra sappy.”
“Okay, okay. I’m extra sappy. Now, can we get the show on the road please? I’d like to show off my beautiful wife,” he huffed in faux annoyance.
“Fine, let’s go,” Jared retorted, motioning for them to walk ahead towards the back door leading to the yard.
Once they were in place, Jared rushed out past them to let the DJ know they were ready. Jensen leaned down and pressed his lips to hers in a quick but sweet kiss as they waited to hear their cue to walk out. With one last smile at the other, the doors opened as they were announced to their family and friends waiting on them.
“Introducing Mr. and Mrs. Jensen Ackles!” the DJ shouted as the couple made their way outside and started dancing their way to the seats that were waiting for them at the head table.
Jensen spun her around and pulled her back to him, both of them laughing loudly as he continued dancing her to their seats. Once they were seated, he placed a kiss on her hand, trying to be subtle, but the beautiful smile that broke out on her face, made him abandon that thought as he cupped her face and pulled her to him in a deep, passionate kiss. The whistles and shouts from their family and friends made them finally part from each other. And he couldn’t help but laugh at the blush on Y/N’s face.
“I’m glad I can still make you blush, baby,” he whispered to her, “But if that made you blush, you just wait for what I’ve got in store for you tonight.”
He cackled at the deepening red that was spreading across her face as her jaw dropped open. He loved making her blush. He had always thought she was the cutest thing when she got embarrassed and flushed. He also liked the way she looked when she was flushed for other reasons, but he had to shake that thought out of his mind for now. They still had their reception to get through before he could have her that way.
“Jay,” she leaned in to whisper low in his ear, “You can’t handle what I’ve got planned for you later.”
Now it was his turn to blush as she laughed at him. But, all she had managed to do was make him want her even more. With a low growl, he wrapped his hand around the back of her neck and crashed his lips to hers in a hungry kiss. They were interrupted by someone clearing their throat.
“Well, we better get these speeches started before these two get too carried away and the reception is over before we know it,” Jared joked, everyone laughing with him.
“Since I’m already standing here, I guess I’ll start,” Jared spoke, winking over at the couple.
“I have to say, I always wondered if I would be here today giving a speech in honor of Jensen and Y/N. I could see the chemistry from the start when she walked on to the set all those years ago to be his personal assistant. But, for reasons we’ll never know, they remained just friends. And then, Jay met Danneel, and they hit it off and got serious, and then before I knew it, they were engaged. So, I put the idea of Jensen and Y/N out of my mind. But through everything, they remained great friends. She was there at his wedding, when he had his three kids, when he and Dee agreed to go their separate ways. No matter what was going on with him, she was there. Cheering him on with his wins, and crying with him on his losses. And when Jensen moved to Toronto to start working on The Boys and he told me she was going with him, that little thought about being there giving a best man’s speech worked its way back into my mind. Especially when he would call me and we would talk. The more we talked, the more I knew he was in love with his best friend. I was just hoping he would figure it out, and luckily, he finally did. Jay, Y/N, I know what you two have been through, and I can say that I’m so grateful that you made it out the other side stronger, and more in love than I’ve ever seen you. Today makes me a happy man, to see my two best friends make the biggest commitment you can make to each other. I wish you both the very best in your marriage, and I can’t wait to see what your life together holds. I love you both. To Jensen and Y/N!”
Jensen and Y/N were both misty eyed as Jared made his way over to hug them both, him hugging Jensen just a little tighter as both men were emotional. She didn’t mind. She couldn’t help but smile as her now husband and her friend shared a special moment. She knew what they meant to each other, and she was happy that the two had that bond. As Jared walked away, Gen took the mic to begin her speech as matron of honor.
“I don’t know how well my speech will go after that one. Thanks, Jared. Just had to show me up,” she laughed, everyone joining her,” Jensen, Y/N, I want to start off by saying congratulations. As well as Jared, I could see the chemistry, but I came into the fold of friends later, so I didn’t know them very long before he and Dee got together. I do know that if there were feelings there already, neither showed it. When Jay married Danneel, he was committed. He loved her. That was plain to see, but, I truly believe that some people have more than one soulmate. And, Y/N, you are most definitely his. Not that he wasn’t happy with Dee, because he was, but that didn’t work out. And that’s okay. They remain great friends and parents to their kids, but he wasn’t happy after the split. We all know that he's secretly a hopeless romantic, and I know he thought they would be forever, and when they weren’t, it hurt him. But, as Jared said, you were there. You’ve always been there for him through anything and everything and you made sure he was okay no matter what. Then, something happened when you two were together in Toronto and you made that transition from friends to lovers, and we were so happy for you both. Again, as Jared said, we know what you guys have been through as a couple, but I always knew you would find your way back to each other. Because if there are two people who are meant to be, it’s you two. You bring out the absolute best in each other, and I, and everyone else, can see the love between you two, and the way you look at each other, that’s the look between two people destined to spend their lives together. So, I raise my glass to my friends. May the rest of your lives be spent loving each other more and more every day, to continue being each other’s best friend, and continue to make each other as happy as I can see you are right now. I truly love you both so much. To Y/N and Jensen!”
Y/N was in tears as Gen made her way over to hug her. She couldn’t believe just how lucky she was to have been blessed with all these people she called friends. How unbelievably lucky she was to be there, on her wedding day to Jensen, and being showered with so much love. She continued to wipe away the tears as Jensen reached over, swiping the rest of her tears with his thumbs, leaning in to kiss her softly.
“It’s now time for the couple to have their first dance as husband and wife. Jensen, Y/N, make your way onto the dance floor, please,” the DJ said, starting to get their song ready as Jensen led Y/N out to the middle of the makeshift dance floor by her hand as the first notes of “Say You Will”, by Hearts and Colors, began to play.
I see you in a white dress
A little church and all our friends
The music plays but I don't hear a sound
You smile at me just like you do
Your mother cries, your father too
All I ever wanted was here and now
Say you will
Say that you'll always be
In my arms
Swear that you'll never leave
Jensen swayed Y/N around the dance floor, holding her as close as he could. The smell of her perfume and shampoo was familiar and calming. A smell that was just her, and something he would never be able to forget. He smiled as he pulled her ever closer, as he sang the next words to her in her ear.
I’ll love you 'til the very end
When your hair is gray
Can barely stand
I promise I will never let you down
Tell me, will you do the same
Will life watch the seasons change
Girl, your tears will never hit the ground
Say you will
Say that you'll always be
In my arms
Swear that you'll never leave
Y/N closed her eyes as Jensen sang to just her. Her mind filled with all the memories of everything that had led them to this very moment, and she smiled as a tear slipped down her cheek. Everything hadn’t always been easy. In fact, they had almost lost each other. But she knew as she swayed around the dance floor with her husband, that everything they had been through had made them stronger, and she knew that no matter what else life would throw at them, they would get through it.
Once the song was over, they invited their friends and family to join them on the dance floor to begin the fun. Everyone danced, ate and drank themselves content as the night went on. It was a party that the couple would never forget as they watched all their family and friends have the time of their lives. Y/N and Jensen were back on the dance floor dancing silly with the kids when he grabbed her hand, nodding for her to follow him. He pulled her over beside the backdoor, the house casting them in a shadow as the sun had begun setting. He walked behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder.
“What are we doing over here?” she asked, leaning her head over to rest on his.
“I’m taking some advice I got from my first wedding, and it was good advice.”
“And what advice would that be?” she chuckled.
“To take a step back, and have a moment just the two of us, to take in everything from the outside for a few minutes,” he whispered, kissing her on the temple.
“That is some pretty great advice,” she agreed as she looked out to the yard, everyone she loved there to celebrate her and Jensen, and the love between them.
“I love you, Y/N. I don’t think you’ll ever know just how much.”
“If it’s half as much as I love you, then I’m one lucky woman.”
They stood in silence as they watched the crowd. Jared and Gen were dancing with their kids, Jared maybe a little on the drunk side. Danneel and her fiancee were dancing with JJ and Arrow, while Jensen’s parents had Zep and Drystan in their arms. Pretty much all the cast from Supernatural and The Boys were there with significant other’s either dancing or socializing. The sight before them made Y/N sigh with happiness. She couldn’t have asked for a better life, and she would forever be grateful. Jensen squeezed her middle softly before he spun her around slowly to look at her.
“Thank you,” he said simply.
“For what?” she asked, a little confused by what he was talking about.
“For this,” he said, waving his hand to motion to everyone in their backyard, “For giving me another son, and the most important thing, giving me you.”
“Jay, you don’t have to thank me. It’s what’s meant to be, and it took me a little while to realize it, but we both deserve it.”
“You’re amazing. You know that, right?” he sighed, cupping her face so he could look into her eyes.
“You’re pretty amazing yourself,” she chuckled before he leaned down to kiss her passionately.
“I’m so happy that we made it here. I can’t imagine anyone else by my side, Y/N. I promise to show you that every day.”
“I know you will, Jay. And there’s no one else I’d rather be on this journey with. So, are you ready for what this crazy life has in store for us?”
“Only if You’ll Accompany Me,” he winked as she smiled up at him. The reference to the song that jump started their relationship was not lost on her.
She leaned up to kiss him, leaving her arms wrapped around his neck as she pulled back to look at him, replicating the smile that was on his face, as she whispered one word that defined exactly what she intended them to be.
“Forever.”
You'll Accompany Me-Chp 20
Jensen X Reader
Word Count- 2279
Warnings- FLUFF
A little over a year later……
Y/N stood in her bedroom, staring at herself in the mirror. She couldn’t believe that today was happening. The long white gown flowing down her body told her that it wasn’t a dream. She was marrying her best friend and the love of her life today.
Gen had been a godsend in helping her plan it. Trying to plan a wedding with a new baby would’ve been a nightmare without her. But everything to this point had gone smoother than she’d ever expected. Jared was Jensen’s best man this time, as Josh had happily bowed out saying he had already been his brother’s best man and that it was Jared’s turn. Y/N had asked Gen to be her matron of honor, as she was her best friend and had been there for her through everything, JJ and Arrow were the flower girls, and now that Drystan was walking, Zep would help him walk down the aisle as the two of them were the ring bearers. Now all Y/N had to do was wait until it was time to walk down the aisle to Jensen. That is if she didn’t throw up and ruin her dress from the nerves.
It had been planned just as she wanted it. Just Jensen’s family and their closest friends in their backyard. Everyone helped to decorate to make the yard look like something out of a fairytale. They even set up a makeshift dance floor on the side of the yard for everyone to dance and have fun after the wedding. She was so excited about going to the reception and having fun with her friends and family, but she had to get through the wedding first, and that was the problem. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to marry Jensen. Because she wanted to be his wife more than anything, but no matter how much she told herself that, she couldn’t shake the nerves that were creeping up her spine. As she looked at herself in the mirror again, trying to take deep breaths, the door opened and Gen walked in.
“Y/N! You look absolutely beautiful! Jensen isn’t going to know what hit him. Hey! What’s wrong?” Gen was at her side in an instant, seeing the tears springing up in Y/N’s eyes and her bottom lip wobbling with emotion.
“What’s wrong with me, Gen? I have the best man in the world down there waiting to marry me, and all I can think is that I’m so nervous I want to throw up! That’s not normal! I should be elated, but I’m just so damn nervous that it’s freaking me out,” Y/N ranted while she paced her bedroom, Gen smiling sweetly at her.
“Hey, calm down. You’re fine. There’s nothing wrong with you. It’s pre-wedding jitters. Everyone gets them. I thought I was going to barf on my whole bridal party before I made it down the aisle to Jared,” she laughed at the memory.
“Really? You were that nervous?” Y/N asked, chewing on her bottom lip.
“Absolutely, and so was Jared. It’s normal, babe. So just take a deep breath, and once you walk out there and see Jensen waiting on you, all you're going to think is that you can’t get to him fast enough,” she soothed her friend, patting her on the back.
“It just kills me to know that Jensen is sitting down there cool as a cucumber while I’m up here having a mental crisis,” she groaned.
“Actually, he’s a wreck,” Gen cackled and the look of shock on Y/N’s face.
“Really? He’s not having second thoughts is he?!” Y/N began to panic.
“No! No! He said the same thing. He can’t wait to marry you, but he’s nervous as hell.”
“Okay, okay. Then it’s just the excitement of finally marrying each other turning into nervous energy, right?” Y/N asked, chewing on her thumb.
“Yes, Y/N. Trust me, you’re both going to be fine. You’re going to look back on this one day and laugh and wonder why the hell you were even that nervous.”
“Thank you, Gen. I just need to talk it out, I guess. I don’t know what I’d do without you,” she hugged her friend, finally feeling like she could take a calm breath.
“Well, aren’t you one of the most beautiful brides I’ve ever seen,” Alan’s voice rang in the room as the women broke from their hug, “Of course, I have to say my wife was the most beautiful, but you’re right up there, my dear. Jensen is going to lose his mind.”
“Thank you, Alan. That really means a lot,” Y/N smiled at her very soon to be father-in-law.
“Gen, they’re waiting for you downstairs. It’s showtime,” he said, Gen nodding and kissing Y/N on the cheek before she left the room, “You ready to get this show on the road, darlin’?”
Y/N nodded as she took his arm. He would be the one walking her down the aisle, and she was so happy that he had agreed to do it. She took one last glance in the mirror before she walked out of the room with Alan. Her mind was everywhere as she made her way down the stairs and to the back door that led out to where Jensen was waiting for her. She watched as JJ and Arrow walked out, throwing flowers in every direction. She couldn’t help but giggle at the girls’ enthusiasm. Next was Zep and Drystan. She smiled as Zep took his little brother’s hand and led him down the aisle, making sure that Drystan had his hand on the pillow, too. Now it was her turn.
As she walked up to the door, she could see all the decorations. They had outdone themselves in decorating. The chairs were all draped in white linen, and they had put up poles on each side of the seats to hold strands of fairy lights above the chairs that made everything look magical. But what really took her breath away, was when she turned the corner and saw him. Jensen was standing there with the biggest smile on his face with tears in his eyes.
Once their eyes met, nothing else existed. Gen was right. Now that she had seen him, she could barely contain herself, so she didn’t take off running down the aisle and jump straight into his arms. Their eyes remained locked as she made her way down the aisle to him. It felt like they were in their own world, and she knew she’d never forget that feeling as long as she lived. Before she knew it, she was standing before Jensen, and all the nerves she felt earlier were gone. All that was left was the excitement she felt about marrying this man that she loved beyond words.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered as Alan placed her hand in his. His teary smile made her have to fight back her own.
“You’re the most handsome man I’ve ever seen,” she answered, his smile getting impossibly bigger.
“Welcome family and friends. We are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the marriage of Jensen and Y/N. This is not the beginning of a new relationship but an acknowledgment of the next chapter in their lives together. They have spent years getting to know each other, and we now bear witness to what their relationship has become. Today, they will affirm this bond formally and publicly. They will mark their transition as a couple not only by celebrating the love between themselves, but by also celebrating the love between all of us—including the love of their parents, siblings, extended family, and best friends,” the officiant said to begin the ceremony.
“They have opted for what I was told was the ‘short and sweet’ version, so I’ll let them jump right into their vows,” he chuckled, as the rest of the crowd laughed, “Jensen, I’ll let you start.”
“Y/N, as your husband, I am yours now. I will give you my heart today and forever. I always feel at home when you are with me, no matter where we are, and I vow to be a warm home for you as well. I cannot promise to find a solution to all your problems, but I can promise that I’ll be there to face them with you. I don't know what the future holds, but I promise to support you during your shining moments and weakest hours. You are my angel and now forever my wife. In your heart, I have found love. In your arms, I have found a home. In your eyes, I have found passion. In your soul, I have found a gentle spirit. So, I promise to be your loyal lover in sorrow, triumph, distance, and closeness. I promise to build a life with you. I promise to cover you from the rain, shield you from the wind, and make a warm home for you inside my heart. I promise to stand with you against all your troubles and take care of you when you need protection, and I promise to never hurt you again with intent. Honey, I love you.” Jensen declared, his eyes brimming with tears, along with everyone else.
“That was beautiful, Jensen,” the officiant bragged, “Now, Y/N, you may read your vows.”
“You expect me to follow that up?!” she chuckled, pointing her finger at Jensen as everyone chuckled, “Well, I’ll give it my best shot.”
“Jensen, I love you with my whole heart, with a passion that can't be expressed in words, only in kisses, glances, and years of adventure by your side. I promise to be an honest, faithful, and loving wife for the rest of my days.I pledge to honor you, love you, and cherish you as my husband today and every day. Today I say, "I do", but to me that means, "I will." I will take your hand and stand by your side in the good and the bad. I dedicate myself to your happiness, success, and smile. I will love you forever. You are my every dream come true, and I can't wait for the reality we get to build together. I promise to be your guiding light in the darkness, a warming comfort in the cold, and a shoulder to lean on when life is too much to bear on your own. I vow to always protect you from harm, to stand with you against your troubles, and to look to you when I need protection. You make me laugh, you make me think, and above all, you make me happy. I look forward to what this life has in store for us. So, I promise to be your navigator, best friend, and wife. I promise to honor, love, and cherish you through all life's adventures. Wherever we go, we'll go together. You are my forever, Jensen. I love you.”
“Wow,” Jensen whispered, wiping away a tear that was sliding down his cheek, reaching over to wipe away the one that had escaped her eye, “Me too, baby. You’re my forever.”
“It’s time to exchange rings,” the officiant announced, nodding down towards Zep and Drystan, “Would you handsome young men like to help them out?”
“Here you go, Daddy,” Zep smiled, handing the pillow up to Jensen, “Drystan wanted to chew on them but I didn’t let him!”
The crowd laughed at how proud he was to have kept his brother from putting the rings in his mouth. Y/N and Jensen couldn’t contain their smiles as they looked down at their kids, and with a ruffle of Zep’s hair, Jensen took the pillow and handed it over to Jared to get the rings untied as he knelt down and hugged his sons.
“Okay, Jensen, you can put the ring on Y/N’s finger,” the officiant said, and as Jensen started sliding the ring on her finger he began to speak again, “Do you, Jensen, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife to live together in matrimony, to love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”
“I do,” Jensen’s voice rang loud and clear.
“Okay, Y/N, same for you,” as she started to slide the ring on Jensen’s finger he repeated the same thing, ““Do you, Y/N , take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband to live together in matrimony, to love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy, to have and to hold, from this day forward, as long as you both shall live?”
“I do,” she said with no hesitation.
“By the power vested in me by the state of Texas, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Jensen, you may now kiss your bride.”
The world seemed to stand still as Jensen cupped her face in his hands. The smile they shared and the feeling of pure happiness would forever be ingrained in their minds. Once his lips touched hers, there was nothing but them. The sound of their family and friends cheering disappeared as he pulled her closer, deepening the kiss. As they pulled away, and looked at each other, their hearts felt as if they would burst. Jensen had finally found the woman he was born to love, and she had found the man that was meant to be her forever.
Beautiful Disaster
Dean Winchester X Reader
Word Count- 2798
Warnings- ANGST, some fluff
Summary- Dean and Y/N are having problems. Dean has been letting his mind get the better of him and taking it out on Y/N. But has she had all she can take? Will she stay, or will Dean's behavior make her give it all up and walk away?
A/N- Hey guys. I know I've been gone for a long time, but between going back to school and trying to manage life, I had very little time. I had this idea pop into my head days ago, and I had to finally write it down. I hope you all enjoy!
It never fails. When the slightest bit of danger comes her way, Dean seems to lose all control. Control of his thinking, anger, and his mouth. That’s the reason she’s sitting across the library from him now. Her feelings were hurt yet again. The last few hunts, he’d picked a fight any time she’d gotten anywhere in the vicinity of trouble, lashed out at her, screaming and asking her what the hell she thought she was doing. She figured that with so much of this behavior lately, she’d be used to it by now. But how can you be used to being berated by the man you love?
Dean knows that he shouldn’t say the things he says, but his self-control is nonexistent when it comes to her well-being. He knows she was a hunter before they met, before he asked her to be his, but that doesn’t seem to matter. He’s drowning in his dreams. The nightmares that he can’t seem to shake are the cause of his behavior, a nightly repeat of watching her die in his arms. The thought of losing her after the hell he put himself through trying not to want her is just too much. All the inner turmoil of telling himself that she deserved so much better, deserved everything that he’d never be able to give her, deserved to be loved by a man that wasn’t such a mess, such a disaster.
But if he could only read her mind and know just how she saw him. He was her everything. Everything she had wanted since the day those green eyes looked into hers. That’s all it had taken, and she was gone. But now, sitting at the farthest seat away from him she could get, watching him drown himself in whiskey once again, her thoughts were now wondering if it was all worth it. She knows how he thinks, that his words come from fear, but it’s still hard not to blame him. Hard not to take what he says to heart, every hurtful word chipping away at the love she has for him.
The more she watches him, the more she wonders if he’s as damned as he seems. Would her whole world cave in around her if she kept trying to save him? Can she hold on through more tears, trying to find more laughter, more love? She just doesn’t know anymore. What is he even after at this point? Does he want her to leave, want her to throw it all down and walk away? That's how it seems. But is that what she wants? To throw away the years spent clawing, scraping, and fighting to stay together. Maybe. Maybe that’s what she’ll have to do if things don’t change. Her heart and soul are tired, so very tired, of the fight, the struggle to love a man that she isn’t even sure loves her back.
Dean can see her across the library, her brows creased in deep thought. The creases that he is usually trying to kiss away when she gets in her head, but this time, he knows it’s his fault. He’s the reason for her hurt, her pain, and it kills him. But what can he do now? The words have been said, and he can’t take them back. He takes another drink of whiskey, squinting his eyes at the burn, and to keep the tears that are wanting to form away. But no one needs to know that. It hurts him to his soul to know he’s causing her any bit of pain, but he can’t seem to stop himself. He thinks that maybe he should just let her go. But that thought is dismissed as quickly as it came to his mind. Now that he’d allowed himself to have her, he can’t lose her. He just can’t. He’s lost almost everyone else he ever loved, but losing her would be his end. He can’t see a life on this planet without her in it. He knows he needs to tell her what he’s thinking, but he doesn’t know if he can find the words, so he takes another drink, wishing he wasn’t such a hard man to be with, to love, because damn it if he doesn’t love her more than he’d ever be able to express, and that’s the problem. He can never seem to express what he’s feeling. Maybe yet another reason he should let her go, but he’s too damn selfish for that, and he knows it.
She’s still watching him drink himself stupid, something else he’s been doing lately. Dean always drank, but it’s been at extremes the last few weeks. They would fight, he would drink, and she would find him passed out in their room later when she would go in wanting to talk to him. So, she’s been holding all this in, all the hurt, the pain, the anger. But, she doesn’t know how much longer she can do it. She needs to know where he stands. Does he still even want her? Or the question she’s scared to know the answer to. Does he or has he ever loved her? With that thought, a tear escaped, rolling down her cheek. She wants him, as much as he has hurt her lately, she still loves the man more than she can bear.
She knows what kind of man he is, and this isn’t the usual for him. Something is going on, but he won’t let her in, let her know what’s going on in that beautiful head of his. And, my God, is he beautiful, his mind, body, and soul. That’s what has her holding on, knowing that the man she fell in love with is there, buried deep under whatever he’s masking with his outbursts.
She wished he could see what she sees. He’s strong, even stronger than he believes. He’s a man who’s seen more tragedy than a soul should see or deserves. But still manages to love with his whole being, absolutely unconditional. The way he loves Sam, his mom, his dad, Bobby, and everyone else he considers family is beautiful. Just as beautiful as he is. But she wonders if he loves her in that way. If you had asked her a few weeks ago, she would’ve said yes. Yes, he loves her. But now, she just doesn’t know. Maybe all those nights in his arms, the way he would look at her, maybe all that was wishful thinking. Because if he loved her, would he be treating her this way? Yet another tear rolls down her cheek as her mind continues to race, pondering whether she can take anymore, or whether she’s going to leave.
Dean chances to look her way again, and he sees it, the tear rolling down her face, and that’s it, that’s all he can take. He has to try and fix this, let her know he’s sorry, convince her to stay, because by the look in her eyes right now, she’s already out the door, and he knows that his life is over if that happens. He sets his glass down, stands, and walks over to the end of the table where she sits. He pulls up a chair in front of her, their knees touching. He reaches out, his thumb stretching to wipe away the tears, but as she does, she flinches away. His heart at that moment shatters. He could swear he could audibly hear it breaking into pieces. Maybe he’s too late, perhaps he’s done more damage than he can repair now. And that thought scares the shit out of him. He drops his hand to his lap, taking a deep breath before he speaks.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered as he exhaled, hoping she would forgive him.
“I know.” That’s all she said, looking past him, not daring to look him in the eye. She can’t. Not right now.
“Baby,” he sighed, trying again to reach out for her, taking her hand. Luckily, she didn’t flinch away from him this time, “I mean it. I’m so very sorry. I never wanted to hurt you.”
“If you didn’t want to hurt me, Dean, this wouldn’t be a repeatable behavior.”
It’s him who flicnched this time. She still wouldn’t look at him, and it’s driving him crazy. He wants her to know that he’s truly sorry, truly regrets how he’s been acting. But how can he convince her if she won’t even look at him?
“Sweeheart, can you look at me?” he asked, actually on the verge of begging.
“I’d rather not,” she replied, trying to keep her emotions at bay. It’s so much harder than she thought it would be now that he’s sitting here right in front of her.
“Please,” he pleads, “Can I see those gorgeous eyes?”
Another tear. Damn it. This isn’t going well, and he knows that he has to do something, but what? He reaches to wipe away the tear, and she lets him. At least that’s some progress from moments ago. He cupped her face in his palm, caressing her cheek with his thumb. She looks at him then, and he can clearly see the pain and hurt in the eyes that usually look at him with so much love and adoration. He really has messed up this time.
“Y/N, I don’t know what else to say other than I’m sorry. I know I’ve not treated you right, and I can’t take it back, but I can try and make it up to you.”
“Dean,” she tried to speak, her voice cracked with the emotions she’s trying to hold back, “I don’t know if you can this time.”
“Please don’t say that, baby. Don’t push me away.”
“Don’t push you away?! Seriously? That’s a bit hypocritical, don’t ya think?!” she scoffs, the anger finally making its way to the surface, “That’s all you’ve done is push me away, hurt me, and break my heart, and you dare to say that to me?”
It’s his turn to cry, the tears he’s been trying to keep at bay now making their way down his face. What a fucking tragedy. The one person he never wanted to lose, now basically has one foot out the door, and it’s his fault.
“You’re right. I have pushed you away, and I take full responsibility for it. I’m scared, Y/N,” he finally admits, his voice quivering as he tries to express what he prays will change her mind.
Her heart starts to race. That’s the most honest he’d been with her in a long time, and she can feel her resolve slowly melting away. She can’t resist, reaching out to touch his face, “Scared? What are you scared of, Dean?”
“Losing you,” he whispered, leaning into her palm. Her touch always seemed to calm his raging mind, and now was no different.
“What makes you think I was going anywhere? I’ve never said or done anything to make you think I was leaving, have I? Well, not until you started pushing me away, taking out your frustrations on me. I still don’t know what I did to deserve that,” she sighed, closing her eyes as the memories of his words washed over her again.
“You didn’t do anything.”
“Then make me understand,” she pleaded. “If I didn’t make you think I was leaving, why? Why, Dean? What was all the anger, hurtful words, and fighting for?”
“I…I…,” he doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t want to admit that it was all over his dreams, but does he really have a choice? Not without her walking out the door and taking his whole world with her, “Nightmares. I kept having nightmares, and they all ended the same way. You're dying in my arms. And I can’t do it, sweetheart. I can’t lose you.”
“Dean, they're just dreams. I know they can be terrifying, but were they worth making me leave? Were they worth ruining what he had?”
“Had?” he choked. Oh no, she’s going to leave, “Please, please don’t say that. It’s what he have not had, right?”
“I don’t know, Dean. I just don’t know anymore. You really hurt me, made me question if you ever really cared. I can’t stay not knowing when the next time will be, when will you hurt me again, when will you lash out and break my heart. I don’t ask for much from you, I never have. But I don’t deserve that.”
He can’t accept what he’s hearing, and she can’t go. She can’t. He slips from the chair, dropping to his knees between her legs, lying his head in her lap, his silent plea to stay, to not walk out and leave him.
“Dean,” her voice is shaking from trying not to burst out in tears. She looks down as he looks up at her, and he looks so broken. It makes her heart ache. Why couldn’t he talk to her before now, before he had already hurt her and made her question if their relationship was salvageable?
“Please,” he begged, his arms wrapping around her waist as his head lay on her thighs. Normally, this position wasn’t him begging for her to stay, but a happy memory. Not anymore. He only knows one more thing to say. Hopefully, it will make her stay, because he means it, means it with all of his being, “I love you, Y/N.”
She’s frozen. Did she just hear what she thought? Did he really just say he loved her? Oh, how she’s longed to hear those words from him, but is he serious? Or is he just saying it because he doesn’t want her to leave?
“Baby, I mean it. I love you. I know I should’ve told you before now, but I was a coward. I’m always afraid that if I said it out loud, you’d be taken from me. Everyone I love is always taken away from me at some point. They always leave one way or another, and I couldn’t bear the thought of you being one of them. So, please, I’m begging you, don’t leave me. Stay. And let me spend the rest of my life making it up to you for being such an asshole. Please?”
She can’t hold it back anymore. Her tears flow as she breaks out into a sob. She loves this man more than it should be possible, more than she believed anyone could love another person. This absolutely beautiful man, bearing his soul out to her, how can she deny that?
“O…o…okay,” she agreed through choked sobs.
“Really?” he asked with hesitation, sitting up to wipe away her tears, “You’re staying?”
“I’m staying. I love you, too, Dean. So damn much,” she cried as he pulled her down to sit in his lap on the floor.
He just held her, let her cry into his neck, as he cried into her hair. No words were said for a long while, as they both held on to each other, enjoying the feeling of being in each other's arms. It had been too long since they had held each other, and neither one wanted to break the sense of peace and happiness of the moment. But after a few more minutes, Dean speaks, but not before kissing her cheeks, her nose, her forehead, and then finally her lips, as his hands held her face.
“Y/N, I’m sorry. I promise to never hurt you like that again. I can’t promise I’ll never hurt your feelings or make you angry. Still, I swear to never do it intentionally. I love you,” he said, kissing her softly again, before asking her what he felt was a very important question, “So, can you forgive me? Can you love me even though I’m such a disaster?”
Her smile made his heart race. Now realizing how long it had been since he had seen it. And right then, he made a vow to himself to make her smile every day. No matter what. He would always find a way to make her happy.
“Of course, I forgive you. I love you, Dean, so much. And you may be a disaster, but what a beautiful disaster you are,” she laughed, the sound music to his ears. “But our whole lives are a disaster.”
And he kept his promise. He made sure to make her smile every day. Most days, it was many times. Of course, they had their bad days. Every relationship does. But he made a point of showing her how much he loved her, no matter what was going on in their world. And she was partially right, their lives were a disaster, but what a beautiful disaster it was.
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If you receive this, know that you are a bringer of joy, a source of laughter, a reason for someone’s day to shine a little brighter. Pass it on, find ten others who light up your world or who may need a spark themselves. And if it returns to you, well… sparkle!!! ✨🖤
Thank you so much. I really needed this today 🥹
Please Help
My mother passed away unexpectedly on March 20th. She didn't have insurance, and I'm the only one left to pay for her cremation. Unfortunately, I'm no longer able to work and live on a smaller income. Any help to get her cremated would be so greatly appreciated.
My mom, Teresa, passed away last night, and she had no insurance. Unfortunately, I have n… Brandy Couch needs your support for Funeral Funds
Anything is greatly appreciated and needed
Please Help
My mother passed away unexpectedly on March 20th. She didn't have insurance, and I'm the only one left to pay for her cremation. Unfortunately, I'm no longer able to work and live on a smaller income. Any help to get her cremated would be so greatly appreciated.
My mom, Teresa, passed away last night, and she had no insurance. Unfortunately, I have n… Brandy Couch needs your support for Funeral Funds
FANFICTION FRIDAYS
This week I moved the # from 38 to 40.
Here are my picks for Dec 20th 2024, please go give them a read:
Against the Wind by @zepskies - You wake up in a strange alpha’s cabin in the middle of a snowstorm, all with a busted ankle. He holds shadows in his eyes, even though his hands are gentle. There are iron shutters around his heart, even though he saved you. You might just save him in return. (Alpha!Dean Winchester x Omega!Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: did Christmas come early in the form of this story? Hell yes, it did. Not to coincide with the theme but Alpha!Dean? I will bite, I will scratch, I will...lick...okay, this just got weird, so sorry, I'm putting myself back in my corner now, all good]
Hey Buddy by @luci-in-trenchcoats - Request: Dean x reader, where reader ran off not knowing she was pregnant, and Sam brings her back with their 2 year old. Dean should be mad, but really he’s just glad she’s back (Dean Winchester x Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: omg I don't think you realize just how much this just melts me, like the Dorothy and the Wicked Witch can't compete. Chocolate and high heat have nothing on me.]
Shadow and Sin by @blackleatherjacketz - Having just recently moved to New Orleans, you get intimately acquainted with both Mikaelson brothers, but don't find out who they truly are until it's too late. (Elijah Mikaelson x Reader, Klaus Mikaelson x Reader, The Originals) [personal note: Both Mikaleson brothers? Where's the front of the line, people???]
Twinkling Tree Dreams by @winchestergirl2 - Trying to spread some christmas cheer doesn’t go quite how you planned, but maybe it will turn out even better than you hoped. (Alec McDowell x Reader, Dark Angel) [personal note: Girl, where is my Alec from your writings of him under my tree??? No bow required. I'm waiting...]
Shout by @blackleatherjacketz - You’ve been with Shane since he left Rick’s group in Season 2, and you need to seek shelter from the rain. (Shane Walsh, The Walking Dead) [personal note: okay, I'm gonna need Shane now, too. Hand him over.]
Forgiven by @darsynia - Since dropping out of school to care for your sister, your daydream has been that a rich, handsome man will save you from drowning in debt. Until then (read: never), you’ll work hard at your new receptionist job and try not to ogle the impossibly hot construction guy working in the foyer… (Steve Rogers x Female!Reader, MCU) [personal note: hot CEO! Steve Rogers and workplace romance vibes? Sign me up!]
Terms and Conditions by @that-sarcastic-writer - when your sister's fiance goes missing, you call Colter for help, and he brings along his rugged, but handsome and charming older brother, Russell. (Russell Shaw x Doctor Female!Reader, Tracker) [personal note: Good God, I need me some Russell]
You can either lead, follow, or get out of the way by @bullet-prooflove (Young!John Dutton x Reader, Yellowstone) [personal note: I've always had a love and hate relationship with John but this started an itch for him I didn't even know I had...no, not that kind of itch...maybe...]
Good Morning by @justrainandcoffee - It's 2012 when Hannah received a call from an important executive to work with them. She's a great musician only until that moment she didn't have the chance to really show her natural talent. The BBC offered her the opportunity to finally do it and at the same time the opportunity to meet him. || Three years later, everything is very different. Two different realities linked by the same phrase: “good morning.” (Tom Hardy x Female!OC, RPF) [personal note: I was so very excited to see a fic for him!!!]
Muddy Waters by @waynes-multiverse - After a mud run and several drinks, Jensen finally gathers his courage and makes a move on a longtime friend he’s been crushing on for a while. Are his feelings reciprocated, though? (Jensen Ackles x Musician!Reader, RPF) [personal note: Mud Run!Jensen and best friends to lovers combined? I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE!]
Love To Hate You by @deanwanddamons - Y/N and Soldier Boy hate each other, but can’t resist one another when they meet again after many years apart. (Soldier Boy x Supe Female!Reader, The Boys) [personal note: Holy fu-- excuse me, I need an ice cold shower, like right now, dayum...]
Let It Snow by @wayward-dreamer - As snow begins to fall, Dean and Y/N some much needed cuddling time in the perfect ambience they’ve created for themselves. (Dean Winchester x Female!Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: OMG LOVE LOVE LOVE this!!!]
Presents & Gingerbread by @lila-lou - Ben has little interest in the season’s traditions but keeps up with the wrapping and decorations just to see you happy. Still, it didn’t take long for him to draw your attention away from the preparations, making it clear that you’re the only thing he cares about. (Soldier Boy x Reader, The Boys) [personal note: oh yeah, this hits the spot...something Ben is probably also saying at this very moment if not soon enough no doubt ;)]
Merry Christmas Sweetheart by @jawritter - Time doesn’t heal all wounds, sometimes it just drives them into our bones and festers there, until forgiveness is a four letter word, and it’s to late for second chances. (Jensen Ackles x Reader, RPF) [personal note: this tore my heart out of my chest and stomped on it so good...don't kink shame me]
Hurt So Good by @nightxcreature - After the reader makes a comment about missing Dean’s leather jacket and the old days, he takes matters into his own hands and takes her on the hunt of her life. (Dean Winchester x Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: (cries) where is my Dean doing this for me? (stomps foot extremely dramatically and then remembers my age and goes back to my corner of shame)]
Something serious by @jessjad - Beau and Y/N spend a summer evening together. But do they both expect the same thing? (Beau Arlen x Reader, Big Sky) [personal note: they better...if not I can take one for the team...or two....or three...or -- stopping right there before this gets any worse]
The One That Got Away by @justwhisperingfantasies - You thought you had left Supernatural and Jensen in the past, but almost 6 years later you get roped back in when your job is on the line. (Jensen Ackles x Reader, RPF) [personal note: not going to lie you can't put Jensen and the word "roped" in the same sentence, you just can't do it, not with me]
I Got You by @janicho88 - When you have finally reached a breaking point, you call the one person you trust for help. He’s never seen you as more than a friend, but he is the person you know you’re safest with. It’s been months since he has had so much as a text from you, but Jake Seresin would do anything for the Navy princess he met years ago. The pilot knows she means more to him than he ever will to her, but he will do anything for her (Jake Seresin x Reader, Top Gun Franchise) [personal note: oh my gawd, just give him to me now, GIVE HIM TO ME]
Meet Cute by @lamentationsofalonelypotato - Reader is surviving in the apocalypse alone, until she meets a stranger who needs her help, even if he doesn't want to admit it. This is a reimagining of when Daryl gets hurt trying to find Sophia in Season 2, in which the reader shoots Daryl instead of Andrea. This can be read as stand alone, but can also be read as a prequel fic to "Your Fault," describing how reader and Daryl met for the first time. (Daryl Dixon x Female!Reader, The Walking Dead) [personal note: I've never been one for Daryl in reader-insert fic before but this definitely is changing my mind!]
Losing You by @thesilmarillionblog - Everything was good as a member of Payback and Soldier Boy's secret girlfriend until the team and your relationship with him began to fall apart due to a new member and her developing relationship with Ben right in front of your eyes. (Soldier Boy x Reader, The Boys) [personal note: any SB fic that starts with this line: '“Get lost fuckface and bring me a coffee,”' certainly has my attention]
forgtten birthday by @chevroletdean - Alec is new to the concept of birthdays, considering he doesn’t even really have one himself. When his s/o is sulky all day, he’s confused, until their friends throw them a surprise party and he realizes he’s messed up big time. (Alec McDowell x GN!Reader, Dark Angel) [personal note: OMG I love my boy Alec so much]
The Chocolate Chip Kind by @beyourownanchor6 - Eddie just wants to sleep, Buck can't let him, not until after midnight. (Buddie, 911 - AO3) [personal note: you always have to have some Buddie goodness and that's precisely what this is!]
Starry Night by @romancingromanoff (Natasha Romanoff x Reader, MCU) [personal note: perfection for this character (happy sigh)]
Princess Treatment by @storiesofsvu (Terry Bruno x Reader x Joe Velasco, Law & Order: SVU) [personal note: I'm still power washing the floor in the spot where I completely melted, holy Christmas, give me these two in a hotel room any day]
Forever Yours by @justagirlinafandomworld - Song Prompt from Unclaimed Love Songs: Faithfully by Journey (Bradley Bradshaw x Female!Reader) [personal note: YES, YES, YES!!!]
In Every Realm by @caplanbuckybarnes - he vows to love you in every universe (Sub-Zero x Reader, Mortal Kombat) [personal note: the young girl in me literally squealed and my heart grew about three sizes seeing this, he was always one of my faves!]
A Sudden Spark by @gloomwitchwrites - Request: The reader is Aragorn's older sister. A ranger and a renowned warrior. After Eomer personally meets the owner of the stories he's been hearing for years, he may begin to fall in love with her. (Eomer x Female!Reader, Lord of the Rings) [personal note: my first Eomer x Reader fic and it did not disappoint!]
Untitled by @catierambles (Captain Syverson x Reader, Sand Castle) [personal note: the fic for this character that I didn't know I needed!]
Request by @imyourbratzdoll - you and the chief get freaky in his car (Charlie Swan x Female!Reader, Twilight) [personal note: (raises hand) What does one have to do to be arrested by Chief Swan exactly? ...Asking for a friend]
The Storm Outside by @bullet-prooflove - Larry comforts you during a stormy night (Captain Larry James x Reader, Walker) [personal note: Storm ambience? Check. One hot ass man that I can also call Captain for fun if I want to? Check. Comforting me in my time of need? Check. Am I torn between wanting to melt into goo and using a squirt bottle on myself to stop fantasizing about him? Check. Check. Am I probably going to have to go with the latter option? Triple check.]
Waiting for the Real Thing by @rizlowwritessortof - You can’t serve in the same unit with somebody without getting pretty close. She managed to survive around him until a couple of years ago. And when she hears about their brother-in-arms troubles, she heads that way to help out. Of course, Russ beat her to it. And now she just can’t make herself leave without seeing him. (Russell Shaw x OC, Tracker) [personal note: you can't see it but I'm foaming at the mouth right now and as you may have expected, it's not a pretty sight]
Dancing Doll by @flamencodiva - Dancing Flamenco has always been a part of Y/N. But she never thought it would put her in the crosshairs of someone dangerous. How did her life end up with twists and turns? And can a green-eyed mechanic really help her? Or will she just put him in harm’s way? (Mechanic!Dean Winchester x Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: Flamenco and Dean??? Where is the line where I sign away my soul?]
Sinnerman by @venus-haze - You can’t even see your old life from Crockett Island, but nevertheless it weighs on your conscience like an anchor on the ocean floor. Father Paul Hill tries to pull the anchor up, only to sink your whole damn ship. (Father Paul Hill x Reader, Midnight Mass) [personal note: Girl, I am about to devour your horror/slasher masterlist...incoming!!!]
Stoking the Flame by @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior - Jenny and Beau have been ignoring the spark between them for a long time. How much longer can they continue? (Beau Arlen x Jenny Hoyt, Big Sky) [personal note: I'm not much of a Beau x Jenny fan, but this was so good and surprisingly satisfying for something within me for my two favorite characters on that show]
any way that you want me by @deanbrainrotwritings - he’s clingy and doesn’t know how else to feel close to her. even though it gets them both riled up, it’s nice while it lasts. (Boaz Priestly x Female!Reader, Ten Inch Hero) [personal note: PLEASE give me clingy!Priestly any day of the week, P L E A S E]
Because of You by @spn-bee - Dean Winchester, a 30-year-old hunter, rolled in to a college town to unwind. Reima M. Park-Gibbs, a 22-year-old college student was the lucky or unlucky encounter. They both got what they wanted, along with unexpected consequences. Dean will now have to protect her and his unborn child while convincing her she belongs to and with him. (Dean Winchester x OC, Supernatural) [personal note: (happy sigh with heart eyes and dopey smile) I just love this]
The Edge of Fate by @deanwinchesterswitch - AU. Cursed by a jealous witch, Benny and Isalie must wander through time to find their way back to each other. (Benny Lafitte x Female!OC, Supernatural) [personal note: yes, Benny!!! I also may call him Sir...on Thursdays and Saturdays and every other Wednesday...just saying...(winces) yeah, that was TMI, wasn't it?]
Home by @syrma-sensei - Ben's discovering new life affairs while expecting his first baby. (Soldier Boy x Wife!Reader, The Boys) [personal note: Ben as a dad gets me every time (more happy sighs)]
Running Away by @jensengirl83 - Sam has feelings for the reader, but what happens when he finally gets the courage to find her and tell her the truth? (Sam Winchester x Reader, Supernatural) [personal note: Awww, Sam...I need more Sam in my life, I cannot even tell you]
When the Lines Blur by @pink-sparkly-witch - Y/N Y/L/N and Jeffrey Dean Morgan have been a successful porn couple for a few years. When Jeff decides it’s time for him to retire, he helps Y/N find his replacement who might become more than just a porn partner. (Jeffrey Dean Morgan x Reader, Jensen Ackles x Reader, RPF) [personal note: okay I never quite saw myself in the adult entertainment business at any point in my life for...reasons but here....um, how does one get hired to work with either man (or both, I'm not picky) on set?]
Looking for more? Please check out my fic rec lists and writers rec lists (1, 2, 3). I do have some things to update like the Beau stories list, Alec, Russell, Jensen, Soldier Boy, Dean, etc (and I promise I will when I hopefully get more time in January) and I do have some more coming out like for Joe Velasco, Bobby Reyes, Law & Order: SVU, LOTR, etc.
In the meantime, if you'd like to peruse even more stories that are on my reading lists, please check out @biggerbearsreads and @tbbrebloglibrary (which will eventually take place of the 1st - tbbrl will be more organized by tags, etc) or you can check out @biggerbearficrecs.
So I threw a ton into this one due to the holidays coming up (and some little personal notes, sorry, sometimes I actually think I'm funny 🤷♀️). I hope you all enjoy the time whatever you might celebrate or if you don't, then I hope you've been able to find some of the amazing stories on this list that might keep you company and provide some comfort or give you the warm fuzzies, whatever you're in need of! I wish all of you the very best!!! ❤️❤️
And please don’t forget when you come across any and all creative content on here to:
And please always reblog! Thank you!
dividers by @saradika-graphics
Thank you so much for the rec! ❤️
Heart Of Stone
Dean x reader
Word Count- 1630
Warnings- Angst, Self-loathing Dean (yes, that's a warning 😂), A little fluff
A/N- This fills my "Unexpected Touch" square for @jacklesversebingo
Dean woke with a start, his body and pajamas drenched in sweat. Another nightmare, another sleepless night. You’d think with everything he’s seen in his life, he’d be used to them. But, he has to take deep breaths and try to still his racing heart every time, ground himself to keep from panicking. He hates it. Hates how, after all these years, his fears still plague him.
This dream was different than the usual nightmares. It wasn’t the faces of all the people he couldn’t save or the monsters that had tried to end him. No, this one was worse. It was about her, and those are the worst. He can handle the trauma that comes with his job and take the guilt and sadness that comes with it, calm himself, and push it down. But, when it comes to the nightmares about her, he can’t.
Y/N had carved her way into his heart the last few months, whether he wanted her to or not. She meant so much to him. Just the thought of her smiling face or the brightness in her eyes when she spoke to him always calmed his nerves. Hell, who’s he kidding? She soothed his soul. But she would never know that. She couldn’t. Dean wasn’t the kind of man that deserved a woman as good as her. As much as he wanted to be selfish, open himself up to her, let her in, and let her start to heal him, he wouldn’t. She didn’t deserve to be dragged down by his self-loathing, insecurities, or the inevitable misery that would come with being with him. No, as much as he wanted to be a man she deserved, a man worthy of her love, he wasn’t and never would be. So, as with everything thing else, he’ll push his feelings down and bury them deep.
As he sat on his bed, back against the headboard, his mind swirling with all the negative thoughts, a soft knock on his door made him jump. He would know that sound anywhere. It was Y’N’s knock. Yes, he had it so bad for her that he could differentiate her knuckles on his door from everyone else’s. He sighed, running his hand down his face, and tried to calm himself before she entered his room.
“Come in,” his shaky voice echoed through the silence.
“I thought I heard you scream. Are you okay?” she asked as she peeked around the door. Her hair falling around her face out of her messy bun made him smile softly. Damn, she was beautiful.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m good.”
“Why don’t I believe you?” she smirked, walking into the room and putting her hand on her hip.
He knew he wouldn’t be able to lie to her. She always saw right through him, which made her more endearing and infuriated him simultaneously. He took a deep breath and exhaled loudly, pinching the bridge of his nose. She wasn’t going anywhere, so he might as well tell her the truth. Well, half-truth. She didn’t need to know that he had a nightmare about her. How he had allowed himself to have her, just to watch her die bloody.
“I had a bad dream. Nothing to worry about. You can go back to bed.”
“Dean…” she sighed, walking over to sit beside him, taking his big hand in hers, “You do know you can talk to me. You don’t always have to go through everything alone. It’s okay to let someone be there for you every now and then.”
“I know, but I’m fine. Honestly,” he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes, the tell-tell crinkles by his eyes not there. She knew he was faking it, and she wasn’t leaving until he talked to her. He was always there for everyone he cared about, shouldering the majority of everything, and he deserved to be cared for this time.
“Let me take care of you for once. You don’t have to be the tough guy all the time,” she whispered, reaching up to cup his cheek in her small hand, caressing it with her thumb as her other hand entwined with his.
His breath caught in his throat, heart racing, as he stared at her. The unexpectedness of her soft touch had surprised him, thrown him off guard, and he was frozen. His head and his heart were in a battle with each other. His mind telling him to back away, to leave now, and to end it before it can go any further. On the other hand, his heart screamed at him to stay, pull her to him, kiss her, and tell her how much he loved her. Casting his eyes down, he tried to decide whether to run or remain where he was when she spoke.
“Dean, look at me,” she pleaded, and when he didn’t look up, she slid her hand from his cheek to his chin, lifting his face to look him in the eyes.
“Y’N, don’t, please,” he whimpered, his willpower slowly chipping away as she stared at him, the longing in her eyes breaking his heart. Because all he wanted was her, to take her in his arms, but he couldn’t. She deserved so much more than a man like him could ever give her.
“No, Dean, you don’t. If I’m wrong, please correct me, but I’ve seen how you look at me. How your eyes follow me when I’m in the room, the longing in them when you think I’m not looking. I know this because that’s how I look at you. If you haven’t noticed, I want you, and I think you want me too,” she admitted, her voice trembling with the anxiousness of how he would respond. She doesn’t know if she can handle his rejection.
“It doesn’t matter what I want.”
“Yes, it does, Dean. It matters just as much as what everyone else wants. You deserve happiness, too.”
“I’m not a good man, sweetheart-” he began to speak, but she cut him off.
“That’s bullshit! You’re the best man I know!” she shouted, her frustration with his self-doubt spilling out.
“It’s not. You want the truth? I hate what I see when I look in the mirror; hate the man that’s staring back at me. You see these hands?” he lifted his hands, turning them around for her to see, “They’ve killed people, Y/N. There’s a dark side to me. You’re telling me that’s a man you want to be with? Because you deserve more, so much more.”
“Dean…” she whimpered, his words breaking her heart. How could he not see what everyone else sees? “First, you don’t get to decide what I want or deserve. And second, you want to know what I see when I look at you? I see a man who raised his little brother to be an incredible man. I see a man who puts everyone above him, no matter what, always putting himself last to make sure everyone else is taken care of. And these hands, all I see are hands that are cut, calloused, and scarred because he puts himself in danger daily to make sure others are safe, people who will never even know what he sacrifices for them. I don’t see that as a bad man, Dean. I see a man who deserves more than he will ever believe he does, and if you will let me, I want to be the one to prove it to you. You’re an amazing man, Dean. Please stop selling yourself short of what you want, and especially what you deserve. And that Dean Winchester is the world, and I want to give that to you.”
“I can’t, Y/N. I can’t. What if something happened to you because you were with me? What if my nightmares come true?” he choked on his words, the thought of losing her bringing tears to his eyes.
“Is that what you dreamt? That something happened to me?” she asked softly, placing her hand back on his cheek. He nodded as he leaned into her touch, finally allowing himself to feel and enjoy how her palm held him just right as a tear finally escaped and rolled down his face.
“That’s why I can’t. I couldn’t make it if something happened to you.”
“Dean, something could happen to me going to the grocery store, a hunt, or I could slip and crack my head open taking a shower,” she chuckled.
“That’s not funny,” he grumbled, turning further into her touch.
“It’s the truth. Anything could happen to either of us at any time. So, why would you let that stop us from having what we want? Why not enjoy what time we do have together?”
“I don’t know how to be in a relationship, Y/N. The one time I tried, it blew up in my face.”
“Then how about we learn together? We’ll take it slow. Learn how to let go of our fears, the things we can’t change, and love each other the way that works for us,” she smiled, leaning in to gauge his reaction, and when he didn’t pull away, she pressed her lips to his in a gentle kiss. A kiss to let him know that she was and would always be there and would take care of him how he deserved to be.
And that night would be the beginning of something wonderful that he had never thought he could ever have. A relationship with a woman who loved him for him and accepted him and all his flaws. Over time, she had done what he thought was impossible. She had broken through and shattered the walls he had around what he thought was a heart of stone.
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This one holds a little piece of my soul. It cuts me so deeply every time I read it.
Thank you so much! This comment has made a very rough day a little better. I’m so glad you liked it ❤️
Pining In The Pines
Dean x reader
Word count-3843
Warnings- Angst, some fluff
Summary- Y/N and the boys have to go on a hunt in her old hometown. She's not happy to go home, and especially not when Dean makes a comment that brings up bad memories. How will she take it? And will Dean be able to make it right?
A/N- This fills my Secret Passageway square for @jacklesversebingo
First, I suck at summaries 😂 Second, this fic is a little self-indulgent. I've written it about where I'm actually from and the stigma about the people in this area. I really hope you like it!
“So, get this,” Sam started the conversation as he looked at his laptop.
Y/N couldn’t stop the giggle that bubbled in her chest. It never failed. When he found a hunt, the first words out of his mouth were, ‘So, get this.’ That’s how she and Dean knew to stop and pay attention. He had something they needed to hear. So, she tried to contain her laughter and give Sam the attention he wanted.
“Y/N…Do you have to laugh every single time?” Sam groaned but didn’t wait for a response, continuing with what he wanted to say, “There’s supposedly been a Wendigo spotted in Morehead, Kentucky. Homeowners caught it on their security camera for their driveway.”
“Morehead…Isn’t that close to where you grew up, sweetheart?” Dean wondered, looking over at the huntress beside him.
“It’s a few counties over, but yeah, it’s close enough. Did you say there was footage?” she questioned, leaning forward to look at Sam’s laptop as he spun it around for her and Dean to see.
Her breath caught in her throat as Dean put his hand on her lower back as he leaned forward to watch the video. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she had fallen in love with the eldest Winchester. But how was she supposed to be around him, living in the bunker with him, and not fall head over heels?
It was true that he had a temper, could be a real grump, and be downright mean sometimes. But, over the years, she’d learned that his temper flared most when someone he cared about was in danger. He would be grumpy when the weight of the world had gotten almost too heavy to bear, and he tried to push it down and keep it bottled up. He was mean when he thought he needed to push someone he cared about away because he was the one putting them in danger. To her, that was just the sign of a man who had been hurt, a man who loved deeply, one who cared so much that the thought of losing someone he loved was unbearable. So, how was she not going to fall for him at some point?
But that’s as far as it went. She would never admit her feelings. She couldn’t. The likely rejection would be her end, and she would have to leave the bunker. She’d rather pine for him in tortuous silence than not have him in her life at all. So, as always, she shoved her feelings back down, focusing on the screen in front of her, and prepared for the hunt she knew was coming.
“Earth to Y/N,” Dean nudged her, clearly seeing she was in her own little world.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m watching,” she rolled her eyes, trying to hide that she was fantasizing about the green-eyed Adonis.
“Where was that pretty little head of yours?” he teased, his words making her heart ache. If only he really thought that way.
“Just thinking of what I’ll need to pack. ‘Cause we’re clearly going to Kentucky, am I right?” she lied, hoping they would buy it.
“Yeah, we have to check this out. I’ve never heard of a Wendigo this far east before,” Sam answered, getting Dean’s attention away from her. Thank Chuck.
“There’s a lot of things in the Appalachian mountains that no one knows about. Trust me, you don’t want to be caught in those woods alone after dark,” she shivered at the thought.
“Don’t tell me you’re scared of the dark?” Dean tried to tease, but she gave him a stern look that made him think twice.
“You should know that I’m not scared of the dark. I follow you into some of the darkest, creepiest places on earth. But, I grew up there, Dean. It’s not even just the monsters you have to worry about. I mean, there are bears, mountain lions, wolves…” she trailed off, not wanting to mention some of the crazy people that live in those mountains.
“Okay, okay,” Dean huffed, throwing his hands up in mock surrender, “I get it.”
“You better. You have to keep your head on a swivel while we’re in the woods. I’d hate to have to save your sorry ass from the real-life Yogi Bear,” she winked, “Because your ass will be the picnic basket.”
Dean crossed his arms over his chest, annoyed at her sarcasm as Sam laughed. Even though she was crazy in love with him, she could give him shit right back. And to be honest, she thoroughly enjoyed frustrating him. As she saw it, it was payback for him making her love him in the first place. She continued to chuckle as she went to her room to pack. Y/N didn’t like the thought of going home. Too many memories she’d like to forget. But duty calls, so she was packing her bags for the long drive to southeast Kentucky.
—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“I highly doubt there’s a Wendigo here. They don’t stay in the wide-open woods,” Dean complained while trekking through the mountains.
“Dean, do you not know anything about the topography of Kentucky?” Y/N asked, shaking her head in annoyance. He’d been in a mood all day.
“Yes, sweetheart. I spend all my free time studying the layout of a state I rarely ever visit,” his sarcasm made her want to smack him in the head.
“Well, dear,” she said just as sarcastically, “Kentucky is known for its underground cave systems. You know, Mammoth Cave. One of the biggest cave systems in the world…”
“Of course! Because spelunking is high on my to-do list!”
“Oh! Look at him, Sam. He’s using big boy words like spelunking. I’m so proud of you, Dean!” she half shouted at him. Trying to keep her voice down so as not to attract unwanted attention to whatever was out there.
“Guys! Knock it off. We’re here to kill a Wendigo. Not for you two to kill each other!” Sam exclaimed, throwing his hands up in frustration.
“She started it,” Dean whined, acting like a child.
“Fuck off, Dean,” she growled as she walked ahead of them. Leading them to the caves she knew were close.
Y/N ignored the bickering between the brothers behind her as she made her way through the trees. She loved Dean, but today, she thought about leaving him in one of the caves they found. He’d been an ass since they woke up at the motel, and she couldn’t figure out what had his boxers in a bunch. They’d had to share a bed, but she didn’t think he’d be that pissed about that, but she wouldn’t put anything past him at that point. But, whatever it was, it tempted her to make him Wendigo lunch.
“Slow down, Y/N. We’re not born and raised hillbillies like you are. It’s taking us a little longer to navigate this hellscape,” Dean yelled, grumbling under his breath about her getting too far ahead.
Y/N froze. That was the last straw. Yes, she’d been born and raised in the area, but that word…Hillbilly. She’d been trying to get rid of that stigma since she left the mountains, and now hearing Dean, the man she loved, call her that derogatory term was too much to take.
“Let me tell you something, asshole! Yeah, I grew up here, but I’m not a fucking hillbilly! I’ll have you know not everyone who lives in Appalachia are backwoods, uneducated, rednecks! So, take that term, and shove it straight up your ass!” she screamed, her anger boiling over into dangerous territory.
Before either of the boys could say a word, a guttural, terrifying growl tore through the darkening woods. Y/N spun around to see what they’d been there to find. The Wendgio was only about thirty feet behind her, moving in quickly. Sam shouted for her to get behind him, breaking her out of her stupor. Once she’d cleared his line of sight, Sam grabbed his homemade flamethrower, flicking his lighter to ignite it, but nothing happened. He tried again but to no avail. Y/N’s screams tore through the night air…
“Run! Follow me!”
The boys were quick at her heels as she weaved them in and out of the trees and underbrush. Dean couldn’t help but think about how impressed he was at her agility in that terrain. He could tell she’d grown up here and knew her way around, which brought him to his next thought. How guilty he felt for saying what he had. But now was not the time to apologize. Right now, he had to concentrate on not losing sight of her and getting shredded to pieces by the monster on their tails.
“Here! Guys, hurry!” she shouted, an old moonshining cabin in her sight.
Once she reached the cabin, she flung open the door, waiting for the boys to enter before slamming it shut, silently praying that the rickety lock would hold just long enough to devise a plan.
“What the hell happened back there?” Dean asked, hands on his knees as he panted for breath.
“I don’t know! The flamethrower has never not worked before,” Sam answered with the same labored breathing as his brother.
“Well, we can figure that out later. Now, we need to figure out how to stay alive!” Y/N yelled, panic starting to set in.
“Calm down, sweetheart. We’ll be okay,” Dean tried to calm her down, but she was still too angry with him.
“Don’t! Do not ‘sweetheart’ me! You had no right to talk to me like that!”
“Look, swe- Y/N, I’m sorry. But I don’t understand why that made you so mad,” Dean spoke as he looked around the cabin for something to use as a makeshift weapon.
“That was a shit apology, Winchester. Just…just don’t speak to me until we get out of this mess,” she groaned, then mumbled, “If we live through this mess.”
“Hey!” Dean shouted, getting her attention, “We are getting out of this. Don’t talk like that.”
“Can you tell me how you plan to get us out of here? Cause I don’t see another way out except through the door that Wendigo is now trying to beat down!”
As she walked toward Dean, her foot almost went through the floor, or at least it felt like it. She stopped, pushing down with her foot one more time. The bounce under her foot had her laughing loudly, and the boys looked at her like she’d lost her mind. Dean spoke as she started to rip the rug she stood on out of the way.
“Care to tell us what you find so funny?”
“This!” she continued to laugh in relief as she pointed to the hatch in the floor where she’d been standing, “It’s our way out!”
“How do you know that? It could be just an old cellar,” Sam asked, walking over to inspect what she’d found.
“Well, as Dean so nicely put it, us hillbillies would dig secret passageways to transport the moonshine back and forth without the police seeing them. They almost always lead to an abandoned coal mine or cave opening. Sometimes other cabins.”
“Y/N, come on, I tried to apologize. I didn’t know it would upset you that much,” Dean threw his hands up in exasperation.
“Well, it did, and…” she started to argue when Sam interrupted them.
“Maybe you two can finish this fight once we know we’re not going to die? Let’s go!”
Y/N and Dean simultaneously rolled their eyes. Sam would have told them they were two peas in a pod if they weren’t in such a hurry to save their asses. Y/N was the first one down the ladder, explaining that she’d be their best bet for not getting completely lost underground, and neither brother disagreed. Dean followed, with Sam on his heels. Once they were underground, Y/N led the way, and the boys were impressed with how well she could get around in the tunnels.
After what seemed like a lifetime, Dean was going to ask if she really knew where she was going, but before he could open his mouth, they turned a corner and could see a light up ahead in the tunnel's ceiling. Y/N was climbing the ladder through another hatch before Dean knew what was happening. Maybe her nickname should be Squirrel instead of him, he chuckled to himself. As the last brother made it out of the tunnel and into another cabin, Y/N slammed the hatch, pushing an old, heavy piece of furniture over it. Luckily, this one was still quite furnished, with beds still in the bedrooms and an old couch in front of a fireplace.
“This is home until morning,” she stated, looking around, finding, albeit dusty, pillows and blankets in a closet.
“Better than nothing,” Sam shrugged, walking into one of the bedrooms and shutting the door, leaving only one bedroom for her and Dean.
“Looks like we’re sharing again, sweetheart,” Dean chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.
“Nah, take the bed. I’ll take the couch,” she whispered, not looking at him. Damn, she was still mad.
“I’m not taking a bed and putting you on an old debilitated couch, Y/N.”
“It’s fine. My adrenaline is still too high to sleep. Besides, I’ll keep watch so you can get some rest. You have to drive us back to the bunker tomorrow. I can sleep in the car.”
“Y/N…”
“No, Dean, it’s fine. Please, just take the bed. I’m too tired to argue,” she almost begged, wanting to be alone.
“I thought you said you weren’t tired?” he smirked, trying to joke, but she wasn’t having it.
“I’m mentally exhausted. I just need time to myself to wind down. Now, please, go get some sleep so we can get the hell out of here in the morning,” she pleaded, the look on her face breaking his heart. He had really hurt her with what he said.
“Okay, sweetheart. Good night,” he said dejectedly, knowing it would be a sleepless night. His guilt would make sure of it.
“Night,” she replied, turning her back to him, sitting down on the couch, staring out the window, never glancing his way. The click of the door made her wince as Dean went to bed.
Sleepless night was an understatement. Dean’s eyes didn’t close once as he lay there thinking how wrong the day had gone. He and Y/N had argued since their feet hit the floor that morning. Him being an ass was the reason for it. He hated fighting with her, but when he woke that morning, she was curled up at his side, her head on his chest. Usually, a man wouldn't complain about having a beautiful woman wrapped around him, but it tends to put you in a pissy mood when it’s a woman you love but can’t have.
Dean was ass over tea kettle for Y/N, but he’d never tell her that. She deserved so much better than being saddled with a man who could barely stand his own company most days. He drank too much, and he wasn’t good at communicating how he felt. He knew that. Sam had told him many times he needed to learn to open up, but he didn’t want to burden anyone with the shitshow that was his mind. Especially her. So, as with his other emotions, he pushed his love for her deep and tried to ignore it. Lately, that hadn’t been working so well. As he lay there telling himself all the reasons he couldn’t have her, a sound caught his attention. He tiptoed to the door, cracking it slowly, and what he saw had him rushing out the door.
“Y/N, sweetheart, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” he quizzed her as he rushed to her side, pulling her into his arms. Her sobs were what he’d heard.
“I’m fine, Dean. Go back to bed,” she hiccuped through her tears. She couldn’t tell him the full truth.
“Obviously, you are the opposite of fine. Talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
“Hey, look at me,” he whispered, placing her chin between his thumb and index finger to turn her face to him, “Is this about today?”
“Partially,” she admitted, trying to turn her head back to the window, but his grip wouldn’t let her.
“Y/N…I’m so so sorry. I know I was being an ass, but I had no idea it would hurt your feelings like that. Can you explain to me why? I’m not trying to fight. I honestly don’t understand.”
“I’ve tried to get rid of the ‘hillbilly’ stigma since I left this place. It's always the same thing whenever someone finds out where I’m from. There’s this image people have about people from the Appalachian mountains that just aren’t true. We’re not a bunch of ignorant, uneducated people who live deep in the woods and never come out. Unfortunately, movies and TV shows have depicted us in such a bad light that most people think that’s all we are. And when that term comes from the man you…” she gasped, catching what she almost said. But Dean caught it as well.
“The man you what, Y/N?” he asked, holding his breath. Was she about to admit what he thought? Maybe, just maybe, he could try to be better, be the man she deserved if she loved him too.
“Dean…” she whimpered, trying to turn away from him again, but he wasn’t letting her go now.
“Uh uh, say it. Say it, Y/N,” he pleaded, his eyes staring into hers, “Were you going to say the man you loved?”
“Yes! Okay? I was going to say the man I loved!” she shouted in frustration as she jumped from the couch, finally breaking Dean’s hold on her, “Now, go ahead and tell me that you don’t see me that way, tell me that you don’t want me, so I can prepare to pack my shit and leave when we get back to the bunker. Because I can’t stay there and see you every day after your rejection. I just can’t.”
Dean stood and walked to her as she stood staring out the window, her back to him after her confession. He touched her shoulder, gently turning her to face him. Her look of sadness and despair nearly ripped his heart from his chest. He thought having his heart literally ripped out would hurt less than seeing her like this. He slid his hand up from her shoulder to cup her cheek. A tear trickled down her face as she closed her eyes at his touch, and he swiped it away with his thumb.
“Is that what you want me to tell you, or do you want me to tell you the truth?” he asked softly, waiting for her to open her eyes, which didn’t take a split second. Her eyes went wide.
“What are you saying?” she uttered shakily.
“I’m saying that I love you, too, Y/N. I have for a long time.”
“But, but,” she stuttered, trying to find her words, “You were so mad at me when we woke up this morning. That isn’t how someone acts when they love the person in bed with them.”
“Sweetheart, I was mad because I opened my eyes to the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen curled up against me, and all I could think was how I wanted it to mean something, and I didn’t think it ever would. If I’m being honest, you could do so much better. And thinking I’d never have you that way pissed me off because I’ve never wanted someone as bad as I want you, Y/N. You’re my first thought when I wake up, and I fall asleep picturing you beside me. I know I’m not a good man, and there’s someone out there that could and would give you more than I’ll ever be able to, but if you really love me, I’m going to be selfish for one time in my fucking life and ask you to give me a chance. I can guarantee that I’m going to piss you off and probably hurt your feelings again, but it will never be intentional. So, what do you say? You want to give us a shot?” He poured his heart out to her, leaning his forehead against hers as he waited for an answer.
“Dean, contrary to what you believe, you are a good man. You love with your whole being and fiercely protect those lucky enough to get that love. I know you don’t believe you deserve it, but you deserve the world, Dean Winchester, and I’d be honored to be the one to try and give it to you.”
“Really?” he asked with a million-watt smile, leaning back to look her in the eye.
“I’ve never wanted anything more,” she returned his smile, both sighing in relief.
“Come here,” he growled, pulling her face to his and kissing her passionately.
The kiss was better than either had imagined, and they both poured the love they felt for the other into it. They stayed that way until the need to breathe became too much, pulling away with smiles. He pulled her into a hug, laying his head on top of hers. They stayed silent for a few minutes before Dean broke the silence.
“So, you want to move your stuff into my room when we get back?
“I don’t know, Dean,” she pulled back, chewing on her bottom lip, “I really think we need to take this as slowly as possible. Make sure that we’re going to last.”
“Oh, yeah, okay,” he agreed, his heart clenching at the hurt he felt.
“I’m just joking,” she laughed, poking him in the ribs, “You’re not going to get rid of me now!”
“Damn it, Y/N! That wasn’t funny! You almost gave me a heart attack,” he grumbled, not finding her joke all that funny.
“I think I’m hilarious,” she smirked up at him.
“You’re something, alright. Now, how about we both try to get some rest? We have a lot of packing to do when we get home,” he suggested, leading her toward the bedroom, “You have a lot of shit. I don’t know where we’re going to put it all.”
“Ha ha,” she deadpanned, “Well, we could always get rid of your vinyl collection to make room.”
“Hey! Those are fighting words,” he growled playfully, leaning down to nip at her bottom lip.
“Bring it on, old man,” she cackled as his eyes shot up his forehead in shock.
“I’ll show you an old man!” he said in faux anger, chasing her into the bedroom.
All that could be heard as the bedroom door shut was the laughter and playful banter between the new couple, and that’s how it stayed for the years to come.
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He deserves all the love in the world! ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for reblogging! And yes, he deserves all the love and more!
Pining In The Pines
Dean x reader
Word count-3843
Warnings- Angst, some fluff
Summary- Y/N and the boys have to go on a hunt in her old hometown. She's not happy to go home, and especially not when Dean makes a comment that brings up bad memories. How will she take it? And will Dean be able to make it right?
A/N- This fills my Secret Passageway square for @jacklesversebingo
First, I suck at summaries 😂 Second, this fic is a little self-indulgent. I've written it about where I'm actually from and the stigma about the people in this area. I really hope you like it!
“So, get this,” Sam started the conversation as he looked at his laptop.
Y/N couldn’t stop the giggle that bubbled in her chest. It never failed. When he found a hunt, the first words out of his mouth were, ‘So, get this.’ That’s how she and Dean knew to stop and pay attention. He had something they needed to hear. So, she tried to contain her laughter and give Sam the attention he wanted.
“Y/N…Do you have to laugh every single time?” Sam groaned but didn’t wait for a response, continuing with what he wanted to say, “There’s supposedly been a Wendigo spotted in Morehead, Kentucky. Homeowners caught it on their security camera for their driveway.”
“Morehead…Isn’t that close to where you grew up, sweetheart?” Dean wondered, looking over at the huntress beside him.
“It’s a few counties over, but yeah, it’s close enough. Did you say there was footage?” she questioned, leaning forward to look at Sam’s laptop as he spun it around for her and Dean to see.
Her breath caught in her throat as Dean put his hand on her lower back as he leaned forward to watch the video. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she had fallen in love with the eldest Winchester. But how was she supposed to be around him, living in the bunker with him, and not fall head over heels?
It was true that he had a temper, could be a real grump, and be downright mean sometimes. But, over the years, she’d learned that his temper flared most when someone he cared about was in danger. He would be grumpy when the weight of the world had gotten almost too heavy to bear, and he tried to push it down and keep it bottled up. He was mean when he thought he needed to push someone he cared about away because he was the one putting them in danger. To her, that was just the sign of a man who had been hurt, a man who loved deeply, one who cared so much that the thought of losing someone he loved was unbearable. So, how was she not going to fall for him at some point?
But that’s as far as it went. She would never admit her feelings. She couldn’t. The likely rejection would be her end, and she would have to leave the bunker. She’d rather pine for him in tortuous silence than not have him in her life at all. So, as always, she shoved her feelings back down, focusing on the screen in front of her, and prepared for the hunt she knew was coming.
“Earth to Y/N,” Dean nudged her, clearly seeing she was in her own little world.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m watching,” she rolled her eyes, trying to hide that she was fantasizing about the green-eyed Adonis.
“Where was that pretty little head of yours?” he teased, his words making her heart ache. If only he really thought that way.
“Just thinking of what I’ll need to pack. ‘Cause we’re clearly going to Kentucky, am I right?” she lied, hoping they would buy it.
“Yeah, we have to check this out. I’ve never heard of a Wendigo this far east before,” Sam answered, getting Dean’s attention away from her. Thank Chuck.
“There’s a lot of things in the Appalachian mountains that no one knows about. Trust me, you don’t want to be caught in those woods alone after dark,” she shivered at the thought.
“Don’t tell me you’re scared of the dark?” Dean tried to tease, but she gave him a stern look that made him think twice.
“You should know that I’m not scared of the dark. I follow you into some of the darkest, creepiest places on earth. But, I grew up there, Dean. It’s not even just the monsters you have to worry about. I mean, there are bears, mountain lions, wolves…” she trailed off, not wanting to mention some of the crazy people that live in those mountains.
“Okay, okay,” Dean huffed, throwing his hands up in mock surrender, “I get it.”
“You better. You have to keep your head on a swivel while we’re in the woods. I’d hate to have to save your sorry ass from the real-life Yogi Bear,” she winked, “Because your ass will be the picnic basket.”
Dean crossed his arms over his chest, annoyed at her sarcasm as Sam laughed. Even though she was crazy in love with him, she could give him shit right back. And to be honest, she thoroughly enjoyed frustrating him. As she saw it, it was payback for him making her love him in the first place. She continued to chuckle as she went to her room to pack. Y/N didn’t like the thought of going home. Too many memories she’d like to forget. But duty calls, so she was packing her bags for the long drive to southeast Kentucky.
—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“I highly doubt there’s a Wendigo here. They don’t stay in the wide-open woods,” Dean complained while trekking through the mountains.
“Dean, do you not know anything about the topography of Kentucky?” Y/N asked, shaking her head in annoyance. He’d been in a mood all day.
“Yes, sweetheart. I spend all my free time studying the layout of a state I rarely ever visit,” his sarcasm made her want to smack him in the head.
“Well, dear,” she said just as sarcastically, “Kentucky is known for its underground cave systems. You know, Mammoth Cave. One of the biggest cave systems in the world…”
“Of course! Because spelunking is high on my to-do list!”
“Oh! Look at him, Sam. He’s using big boy words like spelunking. I’m so proud of you, Dean!” she half shouted at him. Trying to keep her voice down so as not to attract unwanted attention to whatever was out there.
“Guys! Knock it off. We’re here to kill a Wendigo. Not for you two to kill each other!” Sam exclaimed, throwing his hands up in frustration.
“She started it,” Dean whined, acting like a child.
“Fuck off, Dean,” she growled as she walked ahead of them. Leading them to the caves she knew were close.
Y/N ignored the bickering between the brothers behind her as she made her way through the trees. She loved Dean, but today, she thought about leaving him in one of the caves they found. He’d been an ass since they woke up at the motel, and she couldn’t figure out what had his boxers in a bunch. They’d had to share a bed, but she didn’t think he’d be that pissed about that, but she wouldn’t put anything past him at that point. But, whatever it was, it tempted her to make him Wendigo lunch.
“Slow down, Y/N. We’re not born and raised hillbillies like you are. It’s taking us a little longer to navigate this hellscape,” Dean yelled, grumbling under his breath about her getting too far ahead.
Y/N froze. That was the last straw. Yes, she’d been born and raised in the area, but that word…Hillbilly. She’d been trying to get rid of that stigma since she left the mountains, and now hearing Dean, the man she loved, call her that derogatory term was too much to take.
“Let me tell you something, asshole! Yeah, I grew up here, but I’m not a fucking hillbilly! I’ll have you know not everyone who lives in Appalachia are backwoods, uneducated, rednecks! So, take that term, and shove it straight up your ass!” she screamed, her anger boiling over into dangerous territory.
Before either of the boys could say a word, a guttural, terrifying growl tore through the darkening woods. Y/N spun around to see what they’d been there to find. The Wendgio was only about thirty feet behind her, moving in quickly. Sam shouted for her to get behind him, breaking her out of her stupor. Once she’d cleared his line of sight, Sam grabbed his homemade flamethrower, flicking his lighter to ignite it, but nothing happened. He tried again but to no avail. Y/N’s screams tore through the night air…
“Run! Follow me!”
The boys were quick at her heels as she weaved them in and out of the trees and underbrush. Dean couldn’t help but think about how impressed he was at her agility in that terrain. He could tell she’d grown up here and knew her way around, which brought him to his next thought. How guilty he felt for saying what he had. But now was not the time to apologize. Right now, he had to concentrate on not losing sight of her and getting shredded to pieces by the monster on their tails.
“Here! Guys, hurry!” she shouted, an old moonshining cabin in her sight.
Once she reached the cabin, she flung open the door, waiting for the boys to enter before slamming it shut, silently praying that the rickety lock would hold just long enough to devise a plan.
“What the hell happened back there?” Dean asked, hands on his knees as he panted for breath.
“I don’t know! The flamethrower has never not worked before,” Sam answered with the same labored breathing as his brother.
“Well, we can figure that out later. Now, we need to figure out how to stay alive!” Y/N yelled, panic starting to set in.
“Calm down, sweetheart. We’ll be okay,” Dean tried to calm her down, but she was still too angry with him.
“Don’t! Do not ‘sweetheart’ me! You had no right to talk to me like that!”
“Look, swe- Y/N, I’m sorry. But I don’t understand why that made you so mad,” Dean spoke as he looked around the cabin for something to use as a makeshift weapon.
“That was a shit apology, Winchester. Just…just don’t speak to me until we get out of this mess,” she groaned, then mumbled, “If we live through this mess.”
“Hey!” Dean shouted, getting her attention, “We are getting out of this. Don’t talk like that.”
“Can you tell me how you plan to get us out of here? Cause I don’t see another way out except through the door that Wendigo is now trying to beat down!”
As she walked toward Dean, her foot almost went through the floor, or at least it felt like it. She stopped, pushing down with her foot one more time. The bounce under her foot had her laughing loudly, and the boys looked at her like she’d lost her mind. Dean spoke as she started to rip the rug she stood on out of the way.
“Care to tell us what you find so funny?”
“This!” she continued to laugh in relief as she pointed to the hatch in the floor where she’d been standing, “It’s our way out!”
“How do you know that? It could be just an old cellar,” Sam asked, walking over to inspect what she’d found.
“Well, as Dean so nicely put it, us hillbillies would dig secret passageways to transport the moonshine back and forth without the police seeing them. They almost always lead to an abandoned coal mine or cave opening. Sometimes other cabins.”
“Y/N, come on, I tried to apologize. I didn’t know it would upset you that much,” Dean threw his hands up in exasperation.
“Well, it did, and…” she started to argue when Sam interrupted them.
“Maybe you two can finish this fight once we know we’re not going to die? Let’s go!”
Y/N and Dean simultaneously rolled their eyes. Sam would have told them they were two peas in a pod if they weren’t in such a hurry to save their asses. Y/N was the first one down the ladder, explaining that she’d be their best bet for not getting completely lost underground, and neither brother disagreed. Dean followed, with Sam on his heels. Once they were underground, Y/N led the way, and the boys were impressed with how well she could get around in the tunnels.
After what seemed like a lifetime, Dean was going to ask if she really knew where she was going, but before he could open his mouth, they turned a corner and could see a light up ahead in the tunnel's ceiling. Y/N was climbing the ladder through another hatch before Dean knew what was happening. Maybe her nickname should be Squirrel instead of him, he chuckled to himself. As the last brother made it out of the tunnel and into another cabin, Y/N slammed the hatch, pushing an old, heavy piece of furniture over it. Luckily, this one was still quite furnished, with beds still in the bedrooms and an old couch in front of a fireplace.
“This is home until morning,” she stated, looking around, finding, albeit dusty, pillows and blankets in a closet.
“Better than nothing,” Sam shrugged, walking into one of the bedrooms and shutting the door, leaving only one bedroom for her and Dean.
“Looks like we’re sharing again, sweetheart,” Dean chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.
“Nah, take the bed. I’ll take the couch,” she whispered, not looking at him. Damn, she was still mad.
“I’m not taking a bed and putting you on an old debilitated couch, Y/N.”
“It’s fine. My adrenaline is still too high to sleep. Besides, I’ll keep watch so you can get some rest. You have to drive us back to the bunker tomorrow. I can sleep in the car.”
“Y/N…”
“No, Dean, it’s fine. Please, just take the bed. I’m too tired to argue,” she almost begged, wanting to be alone.
“I thought you said you weren’t tired?” he smirked, trying to joke, but she wasn’t having it.
“I’m mentally exhausted. I just need time to myself to wind down. Now, please, go get some sleep so we can get the hell out of here in the morning,” she pleaded, the look on her face breaking his heart. He had really hurt her with what he said.
“Okay, sweetheart. Good night,” he said dejectedly, knowing it would be a sleepless night. His guilt would make sure of it.
“Night,” she replied, turning her back to him, sitting down on the couch, staring out the window, never glancing his way. The click of the door made her wince as Dean went to bed.
Sleepless night was an understatement. Dean’s eyes didn’t close once as he lay there thinking how wrong the day had gone. He and Y/N had argued since their feet hit the floor that morning. Him being an ass was the reason for it. He hated fighting with her, but when he woke that morning, she was curled up at his side, her head on his chest. Usually, a man wouldn't complain about having a beautiful woman wrapped around him, but it tends to put you in a pissy mood when it’s a woman you love but can’t have.
Dean was ass over tea kettle for Y/N, but he’d never tell her that. She deserved so much better than being saddled with a man who could barely stand his own company most days. He drank too much, and he wasn’t good at communicating how he felt. He knew that. Sam had told him many times he needed to learn to open up, but he didn’t want to burden anyone with the shitshow that was his mind. Especially her. So, as with his other emotions, he pushed his love for her deep and tried to ignore it. Lately, that hadn’t been working so well. As he lay there telling himself all the reasons he couldn’t have her, a sound caught his attention. He tiptoed to the door, cracking it slowly, and what he saw had him rushing out the door.
“Y/N, sweetheart, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” he quizzed her as he rushed to her side, pulling her into his arms. Her sobs were what he’d heard.
“I’m fine, Dean. Go back to bed,” she hiccuped through her tears. She couldn’t tell him the full truth.
“Obviously, you are the opposite of fine. Talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
“Hey, look at me,” he whispered, placing her chin between his thumb and index finger to turn her face to him, “Is this about today?”
“Partially,” she admitted, trying to turn her head back to the window, but his grip wouldn’t let her.
“Y/N…I’m so so sorry. I know I was being an ass, but I had no idea it would hurt your feelings like that. Can you explain to me why? I’m not trying to fight. I honestly don’t understand.”
“I’ve tried to get rid of the ‘hillbilly’ stigma since I left this place. It's always the same thing whenever someone finds out where I’m from. There’s this image people have about people from the Appalachian mountains that just aren’t true. We’re not a bunch of ignorant, uneducated people who live deep in the woods and never come out. Unfortunately, movies and TV shows have depicted us in such a bad light that most people think that’s all we are. And when that term comes from the man you…” she gasped, catching what she almost said. But Dean caught it as well.
“The man you what, Y/N?” he asked, holding his breath. Was she about to admit what he thought? Maybe, just maybe, he could try to be better, be the man she deserved if she loved him too.
“Dean…” she whimpered, trying to turn away from him again, but he wasn’t letting her go now.
“Uh uh, say it. Say it, Y/N,” he pleaded, his eyes staring into hers, “Were you going to say the man you loved?”
“Yes! Okay? I was going to say the man I loved!” she shouted in frustration as she jumped from the couch, finally breaking Dean’s hold on her, “Now, go ahead and tell me that you don’t see me that way, tell me that you don’t want me, so I can prepare to pack my shit and leave when we get back to the bunker. Because I can’t stay there and see you every day after your rejection. I just can’t.”
Dean stood and walked to her as she stood staring out the window, her back to him after her confession. He touched her shoulder, gently turning her to face him. Her look of sadness and despair nearly ripped his heart from his chest. He thought having his heart literally ripped out would hurt less than seeing her like this. He slid his hand up from her shoulder to cup her cheek. A tear trickled down her face as she closed her eyes at his touch, and he swiped it away with his thumb.
“Is that what you want me to tell you, or do you want me to tell you the truth?” he asked softly, waiting for her to open her eyes, which didn’t take a split second. Her eyes went wide.
“What are you saying?” she uttered shakily.
“I’m saying that I love you, too, Y/N. I have for a long time.”
“But, but,” she stuttered, trying to find her words, “You were so mad at me when we woke up this morning. That isn’t how someone acts when they love the person in bed with them.”
“Sweetheart, I was mad because I opened my eyes to the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen curled up against me, and all I could think was how I wanted it to mean something, and I didn’t think it ever would. If I’m being honest, you could do so much better. And thinking I’d never have you that way pissed me off because I’ve never wanted someone as bad as I want you, Y/N. You’re my first thought when I wake up, and I fall asleep picturing you beside me. I know I’m not a good man, and there’s someone out there that could and would give you more than I’ll ever be able to, but if you really love me, I’m going to be selfish for one time in my fucking life and ask you to give me a chance. I can guarantee that I’m going to piss you off and probably hurt your feelings again, but it will never be intentional. So, what do you say? You want to give us a shot?” He poured his heart out to her, leaning his forehead against hers as he waited for an answer.
“Dean, contrary to what you believe, you are a good man. You love with your whole being and fiercely protect those lucky enough to get that love. I know you don’t believe you deserve it, but you deserve the world, Dean Winchester, and I’d be honored to be the one to try and give it to you.”
“Really?” he asked with a million-watt smile, leaning back to look her in the eye.
“I’ve never wanted anything more,” she returned his smile, both sighing in relief.
“Come here,” he growled, pulling her face to his and kissing her passionately.
The kiss was better than either had imagined, and they both poured the love they felt for the other into it. They stayed that way until the need to breathe became too much, pulling away with smiles. He pulled her into a hug, laying his head on top of hers. They stayed silent for a few minutes before Dean broke the silence.
“So, you want to move your stuff into my room when we get back?
“I don’t know, Dean,” she pulled back, chewing on her bottom lip, “I really think we need to take this as slowly as possible. Make sure that we’re going to last.”
“Oh, yeah, okay,” he agreed, his heart clenching at the hurt he felt.
“I’m just joking,” she laughed, poking him in the ribs, “You’re not going to get rid of me now!”
“Damn it, Y/N! That wasn’t funny! You almost gave me a heart attack,” he grumbled, not finding her joke all that funny.
“I think I’m hilarious,” she smirked up at him.
“You’re something, alright. Now, how about we both try to get some rest? We have a lot of packing to do when we get home,” he suggested, leading her toward the bedroom, “You have a lot of shit. I don’t know where we’re going to put it all.”
“Ha ha,” she deadpanned, “Well, we could always get rid of your vinyl collection to make room.”
“Hey! Those are fighting words,” he growled playfully, leaning down to nip at her bottom lip.
“Bring it on, old man,” she cackled as his eyes shot up his forehead in shock.
“I’ll show you an old man!” he said in faux anger, chasing her into the bedroom.
All that could be heard as the bedroom door shut was the laughter and playful banter between the new couple, and that’s how it stayed for the years to come.
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Y/n's right, Dean deserved the world and more 🥹💚 this was perfect 💕
🥹🥹 Thank you so much!! I’m so glad you liked it! And I agree, he does deserve the world
Pining In The Pines
Dean x reader
Word count-3843
Warnings- Angst, some fluff
Summary- Y/N and the boys have to go on a hunt in her old hometown. She's not happy to go home, and especially not when Dean makes a comment that brings up bad memories. How will she take it? And will Dean be able to make it right?
A/N- This fills my Secret Passageway square for @jacklesversebingo
First, I suck at summaries 😂 Second, this fic is a little self-indulgent. I've written it about where I'm actually from and the stigma about the people in this area. I really hope you like it!
“So, get this,” Sam started the conversation as he looked at his laptop.
Y/N couldn’t stop the giggle that bubbled in her chest. It never failed. When he found a hunt, the first words out of his mouth were, ‘So, get this.’ That’s how she and Dean knew to stop and pay attention. He had something they needed to hear. So, she tried to contain her laughter and give Sam the attention he wanted.
“Y/N…Do you have to laugh every single time?” Sam groaned but didn’t wait for a response, continuing with what he wanted to say, “There’s supposedly been a Wendigo spotted in Morehead, Kentucky. Homeowners caught it on their security camera for their driveway.”
“Morehead…Isn’t that close to where you grew up, sweetheart?” Dean wondered, looking over at the huntress beside him.
“It’s a few counties over, but yeah, it’s close enough. Did you say there was footage?” she questioned, leaning forward to look at Sam’s laptop as he spun it around for her and Dean to see.
Her breath caught in her throat as Dean put his hand on her lower back as he leaned forward to watch the video. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she had fallen in love with the eldest Winchester. But how was she supposed to be around him, living in the bunker with him, and not fall head over heels?
It was true that he had a temper, could be a real grump, and be downright mean sometimes. But, over the years, she’d learned that his temper flared most when someone he cared about was in danger. He would be grumpy when the weight of the world had gotten almost too heavy to bear, and he tried to push it down and keep it bottled up. He was mean when he thought he needed to push someone he cared about away because he was the one putting them in danger. To her, that was just the sign of a man who had been hurt, a man who loved deeply, one who cared so much that the thought of losing someone he loved was unbearable. So, how was she not going to fall for him at some point?
But that’s as far as it went. She would never admit her feelings. She couldn’t. The likely rejection would be her end, and she would have to leave the bunker. She’d rather pine for him in tortuous silence than not have him in her life at all. So, as always, she shoved her feelings back down, focusing on the screen in front of her, and prepared for the hunt she knew was coming.
“Earth to Y/N,” Dean nudged her, clearly seeing she was in her own little world.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m watching,” she rolled her eyes, trying to hide that she was fantasizing about the green-eyed Adonis.
“Where was that pretty little head of yours?” he teased, his words making her heart ache. If only he really thought that way.
“Just thinking of what I’ll need to pack. ‘Cause we’re clearly going to Kentucky, am I right?” she lied, hoping they would buy it.
“Yeah, we have to check this out. I’ve never heard of a Wendigo this far east before,” Sam answered, getting Dean’s attention away from her. Thank Chuck.
“There’s a lot of things in the Appalachian mountains that no one knows about. Trust me, you don’t want to be caught in those woods alone after dark,” she shivered at the thought.
“Don’t tell me you’re scared of the dark?” Dean tried to tease, but she gave him a stern look that made him think twice.
“You should know that I’m not scared of the dark. I follow you into some of the darkest, creepiest places on earth. But, I grew up there, Dean. It’s not even just the monsters you have to worry about. I mean, there are bears, mountain lions, wolves…” she trailed off, not wanting to mention some of the crazy people that live in those mountains.
“Okay, okay,” Dean huffed, throwing his hands up in mock surrender, “I get it.”
“You better. You have to keep your head on a swivel while we’re in the woods. I’d hate to have to save your sorry ass from the real-life Yogi Bear,” she winked, “Because your ass will be the picnic basket.”
Dean crossed his arms over his chest, annoyed at her sarcasm as Sam laughed. Even though she was crazy in love with him, she could give him shit right back. And to be honest, she thoroughly enjoyed frustrating him. As she saw it, it was payback for him making her love him in the first place. She continued to chuckle as she went to her room to pack. Y/N didn’t like the thought of going home. Too many memories she’d like to forget. But duty calls, so she was packing her bags for the long drive to southeast Kentucky.
—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“I highly doubt there’s a Wendigo here. They don’t stay in the wide-open woods,” Dean complained while trekking through the mountains.
“Dean, do you not know anything about the topography of Kentucky?” Y/N asked, shaking her head in annoyance. He’d been in a mood all day.
“Yes, sweetheart. I spend all my free time studying the layout of a state I rarely ever visit,” his sarcasm made her want to smack him in the head.
“Well, dear,” she said just as sarcastically, “Kentucky is known for its underground cave systems. You know, Mammoth Cave. One of the biggest cave systems in the world…”
“Of course! Because spelunking is high on my to-do list!”
“Oh! Look at him, Sam. He’s using big boy words like spelunking. I’m so proud of you, Dean!” she half shouted at him. Trying to keep her voice down so as not to attract unwanted attention to whatever was out there.
“Guys! Knock it off. We’re here to kill a Wendigo. Not for you two to kill each other!” Sam exclaimed, throwing his hands up in frustration.
“She started it,” Dean whined, acting like a child.
“Fuck off, Dean,” she growled as she walked ahead of them. Leading them to the caves she knew were close.
Y/N ignored the bickering between the brothers behind her as she made her way through the trees. She loved Dean, but today, she thought about leaving him in one of the caves they found. He’d been an ass since they woke up at the motel, and she couldn’t figure out what had his boxers in a bunch. They’d had to share a bed, but she didn’t think he’d be that pissed about that, but she wouldn’t put anything past him at that point. But, whatever it was, it tempted her to make him Wendigo lunch.
“Slow down, Y/N. We’re not born and raised hillbillies like you are. It’s taking us a little longer to navigate this hellscape,” Dean yelled, grumbling under his breath about her getting too far ahead.
Y/N froze. That was the last straw. Yes, she’d been born and raised in the area, but that word…Hillbilly. She’d been trying to get rid of that stigma since she left the mountains, and now hearing Dean, the man she loved, call her that derogatory term was too much to take.
“Let me tell you something, asshole! Yeah, I grew up here, but I’m not a fucking hillbilly! I’ll have you know not everyone who lives in Appalachia are backwoods, uneducated, rednecks! So, take that term, and shove it straight up your ass!” she screamed, her anger boiling over into dangerous territory.
Before either of the boys could say a word, a guttural, terrifying growl tore through the darkening woods. Y/N spun around to see what they’d been there to find. The Wendgio was only about thirty feet behind her, moving in quickly. Sam shouted for her to get behind him, breaking her out of her stupor. Once she’d cleared his line of sight, Sam grabbed his homemade flamethrower, flicking his lighter to ignite it, but nothing happened. He tried again but to no avail. Y/N’s screams tore through the night air…
“Run! Follow me!”
The boys were quick at her heels as she weaved them in and out of the trees and underbrush. Dean couldn’t help but think about how impressed he was at her agility in that terrain. He could tell she’d grown up here and knew her way around, which brought him to his next thought. How guilty he felt for saying what he had. But now was not the time to apologize. Right now, he had to concentrate on not losing sight of her and getting shredded to pieces by the monster on their tails.
“Here! Guys, hurry!” she shouted, an old moonshining cabin in her sight.
Once she reached the cabin, she flung open the door, waiting for the boys to enter before slamming it shut, silently praying that the rickety lock would hold just long enough to devise a plan.
“What the hell happened back there?” Dean asked, hands on his knees as he panted for breath.
“I don’t know! The flamethrower has never not worked before,” Sam answered with the same labored breathing as his brother.
“Well, we can figure that out later. Now, we need to figure out how to stay alive!” Y/N yelled, panic starting to set in.
“Calm down, sweetheart. We’ll be okay,” Dean tried to calm her down, but she was still too angry with him.
“Don’t! Do not ‘sweetheart’ me! You had no right to talk to me like that!”
“Look, swe- Y/N, I’m sorry. But I don’t understand why that made you so mad,” Dean spoke as he looked around the cabin for something to use as a makeshift weapon.
“That was a shit apology, Winchester. Just…just don’t speak to me until we get out of this mess,” she groaned, then mumbled, “If we live through this mess.”
“Hey!” Dean shouted, getting her attention, “We are getting out of this. Don’t talk like that.”
“Can you tell me how you plan to get us out of here? Cause I don’t see another way out except through the door that Wendigo is now trying to beat down!”
As she walked toward Dean, her foot almost went through the floor, or at least it felt like it. She stopped, pushing down with her foot one more time. The bounce under her foot had her laughing loudly, and the boys looked at her like she’d lost her mind. Dean spoke as she started to rip the rug she stood on out of the way.
“Care to tell us what you find so funny?”
“This!” she continued to laugh in relief as she pointed to the hatch in the floor where she’d been standing, “It’s our way out!”
“How do you know that? It could be just an old cellar,” Sam asked, walking over to inspect what she’d found.
“Well, as Dean so nicely put it, us hillbillies would dig secret passageways to transport the moonshine back and forth without the police seeing them. They almost always lead to an abandoned coal mine or cave opening. Sometimes other cabins.”
“Y/N, come on, I tried to apologize. I didn’t know it would upset you that much,” Dean threw his hands up in exasperation.
“Well, it did, and…” she started to argue when Sam interrupted them.
“Maybe you two can finish this fight once we know we’re not going to die? Let’s go!”
Y/N and Dean simultaneously rolled their eyes. Sam would have told them they were two peas in a pod if they weren’t in such a hurry to save their asses. Y/N was the first one down the ladder, explaining that she’d be their best bet for not getting completely lost underground, and neither brother disagreed. Dean followed, with Sam on his heels. Once they were underground, Y/N led the way, and the boys were impressed with how well she could get around in the tunnels.
After what seemed like a lifetime, Dean was going to ask if she really knew where she was going, but before he could open his mouth, they turned a corner and could see a light up ahead in the tunnel's ceiling. Y/N was climbing the ladder through another hatch before Dean knew what was happening. Maybe her nickname should be Squirrel instead of him, he chuckled to himself. As the last brother made it out of the tunnel and into another cabin, Y/N slammed the hatch, pushing an old, heavy piece of furniture over it. Luckily, this one was still quite furnished, with beds still in the bedrooms and an old couch in front of a fireplace.
“This is home until morning,” she stated, looking around, finding, albeit dusty, pillows and blankets in a closet.
“Better than nothing,” Sam shrugged, walking into one of the bedrooms and shutting the door, leaving only one bedroom for her and Dean.
“Looks like we’re sharing again, sweetheart,” Dean chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.
“Nah, take the bed. I’ll take the couch,” she whispered, not looking at him. Damn, she was still mad.
“I’m not taking a bed and putting you on an old debilitated couch, Y/N.”
“It’s fine. My adrenaline is still too high to sleep. Besides, I’ll keep watch so you can get some rest. You have to drive us back to the bunker tomorrow. I can sleep in the car.”
“Y/N…”
“No, Dean, it’s fine. Please, just take the bed. I’m too tired to argue,” she almost begged, wanting to be alone.
“I thought you said you weren’t tired?” he smirked, trying to joke, but she wasn’t having it.
“I’m mentally exhausted. I just need time to myself to wind down. Now, please, go get some sleep so we can get the hell out of here in the morning,” she pleaded, the look on her face breaking his heart. He had really hurt her with what he said.
“Okay, sweetheart. Good night,” he said dejectedly, knowing it would be a sleepless night. His guilt would make sure of it.
“Night,” she replied, turning her back to him, sitting down on the couch, staring out the window, never glancing his way. The click of the door made her wince as Dean went to bed.
Sleepless night was an understatement. Dean’s eyes didn’t close once as he lay there thinking how wrong the day had gone. He and Y/N had argued since their feet hit the floor that morning. Him being an ass was the reason for it. He hated fighting with her, but when he woke that morning, she was curled up at his side, her head on his chest. Usually, a man wouldn't complain about having a beautiful woman wrapped around him, but it tends to put you in a pissy mood when it’s a woman you love but can’t have.
Dean was ass over tea kettle for Y/N, but he’d never tell her that. She deserved so much better than being saddled with a man who could barely stand his own company most days. He drank too much, and he wasn’t good at communicating how he felt. He knew that. Sam had told him many times he needed to learn to open up, but he didn’t want to burden anyone with the shitshow that was his mind. Especially her. So, as with his other emotions, he pushed his love for her deep and tried to ignore it. Lately, that hadn’t been working so well. As he lay there telling himself all the reasons he couldn’t have her, a sound caught his attention. He tiptoed to the door, cracking it slowly, and what he saw had him rushing out the door.
“Y/N, sweetheart, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” he quizzed her as he rushed to her side, pulling her into his arms. Her sobs were what he’d heard.
“I’m fine, Dean. Go back to bed,” she hiccuped through her tears. She couldn’t tell him the full truth.
“Obviously, you are the opposite of fine. Talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
“Hey, look at me,” he whispered, placing her chin between his thumb and index finger to turn her face to him, “Is this about today?”
“Partially,” she admitted, trying to turn her head back to the window, but his grip wouldn’t let her.
“Y/N…I’m so so sorry. I know I was being an ass, but I had no idea it would hurt your feelings like that. Can you explain to me why? I’m not trying to fight. I honestly don’t understand.”
“I’ve tried to get rid of the ‘hillbilly’ stigma since I left this place. It's always the same thing whenever someone finds out where I’m from. There’s this image people have about people from the Appalachian mountains that just aren’t true. We’re not a bunch of ignorant, uneducated people who live deep in the woods and never come out. Unfortunately, movies and TV shows have depicted us in such a bad light that most people think that’s all we are. And when that term comes from the man you…” she gasped, catching what she almost said. But Dean caught it as well.
“The man you what, Y/N?” he asked, holding his breath. Was she about to admit what he thought? Maybe, just maybe, he could try to be better, be the man she deserved if she loved him too.
“Dean…” she whimpered, trying to turn away from him again, but he wasn’t letting her go now.
“Uh uh, say it. Say it, Y/N,” he pleaded, his eyes staring into hers, “Were you going to say the man you loved?”
“Yes! Okay? I was going to say the man I loved!” she shouted in frustration as she jumped from the couch, finally breaking Dean’s hold on her, “Now, go ahead and tell me that you don’t see me that way, tell me that you don’t want me, so I can prepare to pack my shit and leave when we get back to the bunker. Because I can’t stay there and see you every day after your rejection. I just can’t.”
Dean stood and walked to her as she stood staring out the window, her back to him after her confession. He touched her shoulder, gently turning her to face him. Her look of sadness and despair nearly ripped his heart from his chest. He thought having his heart literally ripped out would hurt less than seeing her like this. He slid his hand up from her shoulder to cup her cheek. A tear trickled down her face as she closed her eyes at his touch, and he swiped it away with his thumb.
“Is that what you want me to tell you, or do you want me to tell you the truth?” he asked softly, waiting for her to open her eyes, which didn’t take a split second. Her eyes went wide.
“What are you saying?” she uttered shakily.
“I’m saying that I love you, too, Y/N. I have for a long time.”
“But, but,” she stuttered, trying to find her words, “You were so mad at me when we woke up this morning. That isn’t how someone acts when they love the person in bed with them.”
“Sweetheart, I was mad because I opened my eyes to the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen curled up against me, and all I could think was how I wanted it to mean something, and I didn’t think it ever would. If I’m being honest, you could do so much better. And thinking I’d never have you that way pissed me off because I’ve never wanted someone as bad as I want you, Y/N. You’re my first thought when I wake up, and I fall asleep picturing you beside me. I know I’m not a good man, and there’s someone out there that could and would give you more than I’ll ever be able to, but if you really love me, I’m going to be selfish for one time in my fucking life and ask you to give me a chance. I can guarantee that I’m going to piss you off and probably hurt your feelings again, but it will never be intentional. So, what do you say? You want to give us a shot?” He poured his heart out to her, leaning his forehead against hers as he waited for an answer.
“Dean, contrary to what you believe, you are a good man. You love with your whole being and fiercely protect those lucky enough to get that love. I know you don’t believe you deserve it, but you deserve the world, Dean Winchester, and I’d be honored to be the one to try and give it to you.”
“Really?” he asked with a million-watt smile, leaning back to look her in the eye.
“I’ve never wanted anything more,” she returned his smile, both sighing in relief.
“Come here,” he growled, pulling her face to his and kissing her passionately.
The kiss was better than either had imagined, and they both poured the love they felt for the other into it. They stayed that way until the need to breathe became too much, pulling away with smiles. He pulled her into a hug, laying his head on top of hers. They stayed silent for a few minutes before Dean broke the silence.
“So, you want to move your stuff into my room when we get back?
“I don’t know, Dean,” she pulled back, chewing on her bottom lip, “I really think we need to take this as slowly as possible. Make sure that we’re going to last.”
“Oh, yeah, okay,” he agreed, his heart clenching at the hurt he felt.
“I’m just joking,” she laughed, poking him in the ribs, “You’re not going to get rid of me now!”
“Damn it, Y/N! That wasn’t funny! You almost gave me a heart attack,” he grumbled, not finding her joke all that funny.
“I think I’m hilarious,” she smirked up at him.
“You’re something, alright. Now, how about we both try to get some rest? We have a lot of packing to do when we get home,” he suggested, leading her toward the bedroom, “You have a lot of shit. I don’t know where we’re going to put it all.”
“Ha ha,” she deadpanned, “Well, we could always get rid of your vinyl collection to make room.”
“Hey! Those are fighting words,” he growled playfully, leaning down to nip at her bottom lip.
“Bring it on, old man,” she cackled as his eyes shot up his forehead in shock.
“I’ll show you an old man!” he said in faux anger, chasing her into the bedroom.
All that could be heard as the bedroom door shut was the laughter and playful banter between the new couple, and that’s how it stayed for the years to come.
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Thank you for the reblog, mama 😘❤️
Pining In The Pines
Dean x reader
Word count-3843
Warnings- Angst, some fluff
Summary- Y/N and the boys have to go on a hunt in her old hometown. She's not happy to go home, and especially not when Dean makes a comment that brings up bad memories. How will she take it? And will Dean be able to make it right?
A/N- This fills my Secret Passageway square for @jacklesversebingo
First, I suck at summaries 😂 Second, this fic is a little self-indulgent. I've written it about where I'm actually from and the stigma about the people in this area. I really hope you like it!
“So, get this,” Sam started the conversation as he looked at his laptop.
Y/N couldn’t stop the giggle that bubbled in her chest. It never failed. When he found a hunt, the first words out of his mouth were, ‘So, get this.’ That’s how she and Dean knew to stop and pay attention. He had something they needed to hear. So, she tried to contain her laughter and give Sam the attention he wanted.
“Y/N…Do you have to laugh every single time?” Sam groaned but didn’t wait for a response, continuing with what he wanted to say, “There’s supposedly been a Wendigo spotted in Morehead, Kentucky. Homeowners caught it on their security camera for their driveway.”
“Morehead…Isn’t that close to where you grew up, sweetheart?” Dean wondered, looking over at the huntress beside him.
“It’s a few counties over, but yeah, it’s close enough. Did you say there was footage?” she questioned, leaning forward to look at Sam’s laptop as he spun it around for her and Dean to see.
Her breath caught in her throat as Dean put his hand on her lower back as he leaned forward to watch the video. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, she had fallen in love with the eldest Winchester. But how was she supposed to be around him, living in the bunker with him, and not fall head over heels?
It was true that he had a temper, could be a real grump, and be downright mean sometimes. But, over the years, she’d learned that his temper flared most when someone he cared about was in danger. He would be grumpy when the weight of the world had gotten almost too heavy to bear, and he tried to push it down and keep it bottled up. He was mean when he thought he needed to push someone he cared about away because he was the one putting them in danger. To her, that was just the sign of a man who had been hurt, a man who loved deeply, one who cared so much that the thought of losing someone he loved was unbearable. So, how was she not going to fall for him at some point?
But that’s as far as it went. She would never admit her feelings. She couldn’t. The likely rejection would be her end, and she would have to leave the bunker. She’d rather pine for him in tortuous silence than not have him in her life at all. So, as always, she shoved her feelings back down, focusing on the screen in front of her, and prepared for the hunt she knew was coming.
“Earth to Y/N,” Dean nudged her, clearly seeing she was in her own little world.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m watching,” she rolled her eyes, trying to hide that she was fantasizing about the green-eyed Adonis.
“Where was that pretty little head of yours?” he teased, his words making her heart ache. If only he really thought that way.
“Just thinking of what I’ll need to pack. ‘Cause we’re clearly going to Kentucky, am I right?” she lied, hoping they would buy it.
“Yeah, we have to check this out. I’ve never heard of a Wendigo this far east before,” Sam answered, getting Dean’s attention away from her. Thank Chuck.
“There’s a lot of things in the Appalachian mountains that no one knows about. Trust me, you don’t want to be caught in those woods alone after dark,” she shivered at the thought.
“Don’t tell me you’re scared of the dark?” Dean tried to tease, but she gave him a stern look that made him think twice.
“You should know that I’m not scared of the dark. I follow you into some of the darkest, creepiest places on earth. But, I grew up there, Dean. It’s not even just the monsters you have to worry about. I mean, there are bears, mountain lions, wolves…” she trailed off, not wanting to mention some of the crazy people that live in those mountains.
“Okay, okay,” Dean huffed, throwing his hands up in mock surrender, “I get it.”
“You better. You have to keep your head on a swivel while we’re in the woods. I’d hate to have to save your sorry ass from the real-life Yogi Bear,” she winked, “Because your ass will be the picnic basket.”
Dean crossed his arms over his chest, annoyed at her sarcasm as Sam laughed. Even though she was crazy in love with him, she could give him shit right back. And to be honest, she thoroughly enjoyed frustrating him. As she saw it, it was payback for him making her love him in the first place. She continued to chuckle as she went to her room to pack. Y/N didn’t like the thought of going home. Too many memories she’d like to forget. But duty calls, so she was packing her bags for the long drive to southeast Kentucky.
—---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“I highly doubt there’s a Wendigo here. They don’t stay in the wide-open woods,” Dean complained while trekking through the mountains.
“Dean, do you not know anything about the topography of Kentucky?” Y/N asked, shaking her head in annoyance. He’d been in a mood all day.
“Yes, sweetheart. I spend all my free time studying the layout of a state I rarely ever visit,” his sarcasm made her want to smack him in the head.
“Well, dear,” she said just as sarcastically, “Kentucky is known for its underground cave systems. You know, Mammoth Cave. One of the biggest cave systems in the world…”
“Of course! Because spelunking is high on my to-do list!”
“Oh! Look at him, Sam. He’s using big boy words like spelunking. I’m so proud of you, Dean!” she half shouted at him. Trying to keep her voice down so as not to attract unwanted attention to whatever was out there.
“Guys! Knock it off. We’re here to kill a Wendigo. Not for you two to kill each other!” Sam exclaimed, throwing his hands up in frustration.
“She started it,” Dean whined, acting like a child.
“Fuck off, Dean,” she growled as she walked ahead of them. Leading them to the caves she knew were close.
Y/N ignored the bickering between the brothers behind her as she made her way through the trees. She loved Dean, but today, she thought about leaving him in one of the caves they found. He’d been an ass since they woke up at the motel, and she couldn’t figure out what had his boxers in a bunch. They’d had to share a bed, but she didn’t think he’d be that pissed about that, but she wouldn’t put anything past him at that point. But, whatever it was, it tempted her to make him Wendigo lunch.
“Slow down, Y/N. We’re not born and raised hillbillies like you are. It’s taking us a little longer to navigate this hellscape,” Dean yelled, grumbling under his breath about her getting too far ahead.
Y/N froze. That was the last straw. Yes, she’d been born and raised in the area, but that word…Hillbilly. She’d been trying to get rid of that stigma since she left the mountains, and now hearing Dean, the man she loved, call her that derogatory term was too much to take.
“Let me tell you something, asshole! Yeah, I grew up here, but I’m not a fucking hillbilly! I’ll have you know not everyone who lives in Appalachia are backwoods, uneducated, rednecks! So, take that term, and shove it straight up your ass!” she screamed, her anger boiling over into dangerous territory.
Before either of the boys could say a word, a guttural, terrifying growl tore through the darkening woods. Y/N spun around to see what they’d been there to find. The Wendgio was only about thirty feet behind her, moving in quickly. Sam shouted for her to get behind him, breaking her out of her stupor. Once she’d cleared his line of sight, Sam grabbed his homemade flamethrower, flicking his lighter to ignite it, but nothing happened. He tried again but to no avail. Y/N’s screams tore through the night air…
“Run! Follow me!”
The boys were quick at her heels as she weaved them in and out of the trees and underbrush. Dean couldn’t help but think about how impressed he was at her agility in that terrain. He could tell she’d grown up here and knew her way around, which brought him to his next thought. How guilty he felt for saying what he had. But now was not the time to apologize. Right now, he had to concentrate on not losing sight of her and getting shredded to pieces by the monster on their tails.
“Here! Guys, hurry!” she shouted, an old moonshining cabin in her sight.
Once she reached the cabin, she flung open the door, waiting for the boys to enter before slamming it shut, silently praying that the rickety lock would hold just long enough to devise a plan.
“What the hell happened back there?” Dean asked, hands on his knees as he panted for breath.
“I don’t know! The flamethrower has never not worked before,” Sam answered with the same labored breathing as his brother.
“Well, we can figure that out later. Now, we need to figure out how to stay alive!” Y/N yelled, panic starting to set in.
“Calm down, sweetheart. We’ll be okay,” Dean tried to calm her down, but she was still too angry with him.
“Don’t! Do not ‘sweetheart’ me! You had no right to talk to me like that!”
“Look, swe- Y/N, I’m sorry. But I don’t understand why that made you so mad,” Dean spoke as he looked around the cabin for something to use as a makeshift weapon.
“That was a shit apology, Winchester. Just…just don’t speak to me until we get out of this mess,” she groaned, then mumbled, “If we live through this mess.”
“Hey!” Dean shouted, getting her attention, “We are getting out of this. Don’t talk like that.”
“Can you tell me how you plan to get us out of here? Cause I don’t see another way out except through the door that Wendigo is now trying to beat down!”
As she walked toward Dean, her foot almost went through the floor, or at least it felt like it. She stopped, pushing down with her foot one more time. The bounce under her foot had her laughing loudly, and the boys looked at her like she’d lost her mind. Dean spoke as she started to rip the rug she stood on out of the way.
“Care to tell us what you find so funny?”
“This!” she continued to laugh in relief as she pointed to the hatch in the floor where she’d been standing, “It’s our way out!”
“How do you know that? It could be just an old cellar,” Sam asked, walking over to inspect what she’d found.
“Well, as Dean so nicely put it, us hillbillies would dig secret passageways to transport the moonshine back and forth without the police seeing them. They almost always lead to an abandoned coal mine or cave opening. Sometimes other cabins.”
“Y/N, come on, I tried to apologize. I didn’t know it would upset you that much,” Dean threw his hands up in exasperation.
“Well, it did, and…” she started to argue when Sam interrupted them.
“Maybe you two can finish this fight once we know we’re not going to die? Let’s go!”
Y/N and Dean simultaneously rolled their eyes. Sam would have told them they were two peas in a pod if they weren’t in such a hurry to save their asses. Y/N was the first one down the ladder, explaining that she’d be their best bet for not getting completely lost underground, and neither brother disagreed. Dean followed, with Sam on his heels. Once they were underground, Y/N led the way, and the boys were impressed with how well she could get around in the tunnels.
After what seemed like a lifetime, Dean was going to ask if she really knew where she was going, but before he could open his mouth, they turned a corner and could see a light up ahead in the tunnel's ceiling. Y/N was climbing the ladder through another hatch before Dean knew what was happening. Maybe her nickname should be Squirrel instead of him, he chuckled to himself. As the last brother made it out of the tunnel and into another cabin, Y/N slammed the hatch, pushing an old, heavy piece of furniture over it. Luckily, this one was still quite furnished, with beds still in the bedrooms and an old couch in front of a fireplace.
“This is home until morning,” she stated, looking around, finding, albeit dusty, pillows and blankets in a closet.
“Better than nothing,” Sam shrugged, walking into one of the bedrooms and shutting the door, leaving only one bedroom for her and Dean.
“Looks like we’re sharing again, sweetheart,” Dean chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.
“Nah, take the bed. I’ll take the couch,” she whispered, not looking at him. Damn, she was still mad.
“I’m not taking a bed and putting you on an old debilitated couch, Y/N.”
“It’s fine. My adrenaline is still too high to sleep. Besides, I’ll keep watch so you can get some rest. You have to drive us back to the bunker tomorrow. I can sleep in the car.”
“Y/N…”
“No, Dean, it’s fine. Please, just take the bed. I’m too tired to argue,” she almost begged, wanting to be alone.
“I thought you said you weren’t tired?” he smirked, trying to joke, but she wasn’t having it.
“I’m mentally exhausted. I just need time to myself to wind down. Now, please, go get some sleep so we can get the hell out of here in the morning,” she pleaded, the look on her face breaking his heart. He had really hurt her with what he said.
“Okay, sweetheart. Good night,” he said dejectedly, knowing it would be a sleepless night. His guilt would make sure of it.
“Night,” she replied, turning her back to him, sitting down on the couch, staring out the window, never glancing his way. The click of the door made her wince as Dean went to bed.
Sleepless night was an understatement. Dean’s eyes didn’t close once as he lay there thinking how wrong the day had gone. He and Y/N had argued since their feet hit the floor that morning. Him being an ass was the reason for it. He hated fighting with her, but when he woke that morning, she was curled up at his side, her head on his chest. Usually, a man wouldn't complain about having a beautiful woman wrapped around him, but it tends to put you in a pissy mood when it’s a woman you love but can’t have.
Dean was ass over tea kettle for Y/N, but he’d never tell her that. She deserved so much better than being saddled with a man who could barely stand his own company most days. He drank too much, and he wasn’t good at communicating how he felt. He knew that. Sam had told him many times he needed to learn to open up, but he didn’t want to burden anyone with the shitshow that was his mind. Especially her. So, as with his other emotions, he pushed his love for her deep and tried to ignore it. Lately, that hadn’t been working so well. As he lay there telling himself all the reasons he couldn’t have her, a sound caught his attention. He tiptoed to the door, cracking it slowly, and what he saw had him rushing out the door.
“Y/N, sweetheart, what’s wrong? Are you okay?” he quizzed her as he rushed to her side, pulling her into his arms. Her sobs were what he’d heard.
“I’m fine, Dean. Go back to bed,” she hiccuped through her tears. She couldn’t tell him the full truth.
“Obviously, you are the opposite of fine. Talk to me.”
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
“Hey, look at me,” he whispered, placing her chin between his thumb and index finger to turn her face to him, “Is this about today?”
“Partially,” she admitted, trying to turn her head back to the window, but his grip wouldn’t let her.
“Y/N…I’m so so sorry. I know I was being an ass, but I had no idea it would hurt your feelings like that. Can you explain to me why? I’m not trying to fight. I honestly don’t understand.”
“I’ve tried to get rid of the ‘hillbilly’ stigma since I left this place. It's always the same thing whenever someone finds out where I’m from. There’s this image people have about people from the Appalachian mountains that just aren’t true. We’re not a bunch of ignorant, uneducated people who live deep in the woods and never come out. Unfortunately, movies and TV shows have depicted us in such a bad light that most people think that’s all we are. And when that term comes from the man you…” she gasped, catching what she almost said. But Dean caught it as well.
“The man you what, Y/N?” he asked, holding his breath. Was she about to admit what he thought? Maybe, just maybe, he could try to be better, be the man she deserved if she loved him too.
“Dean…” she whimpered, trying to turn away from him again, but he wasn’t letting her go now.
“Uh uh, say it. Say it, Y/N,” he pleaded, his eyes staring into hers, “Were you going to say the man you loved?”
“Yes! Okay? I was going to say the man I loved!” she shouted in frustration as she jumped from the couch, finally breaking Dean’s hold on her, “Now, go ahead and tell me that you don’t see me that way, tell me that you don’t want me, so I can prepare to pack my shit and leave when we get back to the bunker. Because I can’t stay there and see you every day after your rejection. I just can’t.”
Dean stood and walked to her as she stood staring out the window, her back to him after her confession. He touched her shoulder, gently turning her to face him. Her look of sadness and despair nearly ripped his heart from his chest. He thought having his heart literally ripped out would hurt less than seeing her like this. He slid his hand up from her shoulder to cup her cheek. A tear trickled down her face as she closed her eyes at his touch, and he swiped it away with his thumb.
“Is that what you want me to tell you, or do you want me to tell you the truth?” he asked softly, waiting for her to open her eyes, which didn’t take a split second. Her eyes went wide.
“What are you saying?” she uttered shakily.
“I’m saying that I love you, too, Y/N. I have for a long time.”
“But, but,” she stuttered, trying to find her words, “You were so mad at me when we woke up this morning. That isn’t how someone acts when they love the person in bed with them.”
“Sweetheart, I was mad because I opened my eyes to the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen curled up against me, and all I could think was how I wanted it to mean something, and I didn’t think it ever would. If I’m being honest, you could do so much better. And thinking I’d never have you that way pissed me off because I’ve never wanted someone as bad as I want you, Y/N. You’re my first thought when I wake up, and I fall asleep picturing you beside me. I know I’m not a good man, and there’s someone out there that could and would give you more than I’ll ever be able to, but if you really love me, I’m going to be selfish for one time in my fucking life and ask you to give me a chance. I can guarantee that I’m going to piss you off and probably hurt your feelings again, but it will never be intentional. So, what do you say? You want to give us a shot?” He poured his heart out to her, leaning his forehead against hers as he waited for an answer.
“Dean, contrary to what you believe, you are a good man. You love with your whole being and fiercely protect those lucky enough to get that love. I know you don’t believe you deserve it, but you deserve the world, Dean Winchester, and I’d be honored to be the one to try and give it to you.”
“Really?” he asked with a million-watt smile, leaning back to look her in the eye.
“I’ve never wanted anything more,” she returned his smile, both sighing in relief.
“Come here,” he growled, pulling her face to his and kissing her passionately.
The kiss was better than either had imagined, and they both poured the love they felt for the other into it. They stayed that way until the need to breathe became too much, pulling away with smiles. He pulled her into a hug, laying his head on top of hers. They stayed silent for a few minutes before Dean broke the silence.
“So, you want to move your stuff into my room when we get back?
“I don’t know, Dean,” she pulled back, chewing on her bottom lip, “I really think we need to take this as slowly as possible. Make sure that we’re going to last.”
“Oh, yeah, okay,” he agreed, his heart clenching at the hurt he felt.
“I’m just joking,” she laughed, poking him in the ribs, “You’re not going to get rid of me now!”
“Damn it, Y/N! That wasn’t funny! You almost gave me a heart attack,” he grumbled, not finding her joke all that funny.
“I think I’m hilarious,” she smirked up at him.
“You’re something, alright. Now, how about we both try to get some rest? We have a lot of packing to do when we get home,” he suggested, leading her toward the bedroom, “You have a lot of shit. I don’t know where we’re going to put it all.”
“Ha ha,” she deadpanned, “Well, we could always get rid of your vinyl collection to make room.”
“Hey! Those are fighting words,” he growled playfully, leaning down to nip at her bottom lip.
“Bring it on, old man,” she cackled as his eyes shot up his forehead in shock.
“I’ll show you an old man!” he said in faux anger, chasing her into the bedroom.
All that could be heard as the bedroom door shut was the laughter and playful banter between the new couple, and that’s how it stayed for the years to come.
@flamencodiva @foxyjwls007 @emoryhemsworth @valsworldofcreativity @hardcoresupernaturalfans
@msmarvelouswinchester @lyarr24 @ellewritesfix05 @defenderrosetyler
@hobby27 @supernatural-love14 @vicmc624 @squirrelnotsam @tatted-trina6 @xhannahbananax03 @coffeebooksandfandom @deans-baby-momma @lovelyrocker @fablesrose
@maralisa124 @wayward-dreamer @aimee-ginge @donnaintx @screechingartisancashbailiff
@itsdesiree86 @kyjey @roxytheimmortal @briagallen @aubageddon91
@stoneyggirl2l @kitkatd7 @brilovesdeanwinchester @allonsy-yesiwill @krazykelly
@440mxs-wife @rebelemilu @sarahbaker2010 @tyferbebe @metalfangirl
@redbarn1995 @thoughts-and-funnies @izzathequeen @heavensangel45135 @entersand-man
@supraveng @hintsofhoney @bobbie3939 @waynes-multiverse @katelyn--renee
@thinkinghardhardlythinking @makeadealwithdean @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @pink-sparkly-witch
@samsgirl93 @maliburenee @thelastpyle @nancymcl @marvelouslyme96
@muhahaha303 @maggiegirl17 @slamminmine @ladysparkles78 @deanwinchestersgirl27
Writer Recs List Page 1
Rec list under Read More:
@arazialotis - Masterlist
@xylodemon
@museaway - writing tag
@valleydean
@jawritter - Masterlist
@klutzygirl
@aimmyarrowshigh
@orangeflavoryawp
thimbleful
Onelonely_tortillachip
@hmslusitania
@wayward-dreamer - Masterlist
@deanwanddamons - Masterlist
@mind-empty-just-fictional-people - Masterlist
@deanbrainrotwritings - Masterlist
@holylulusworld - Masterlist
@mishapocalyse - Masterlist
@flamencodiva - Masterlist
@pink-sparkly-witch - Masterlist
@previousloversandmuses - Masterlist
komodobits
@that-sarcastic-writer - Masterlist
@wraithlafitte - Masterlist
@fandom-chic - Masterlist
@venus-haze - Masterlist
@deangirlsstuff67 - Masterlist
@mostly-imagines - Masterlist
@whatareyousearchingfordean - Masterlist
@avanatural - Masterlist
@negans-lucille-tblr - Masterlist
@impala-dreamer - Masterlist
@syrma-sensei - Masterlist
@boxesandrings
mrstrentreznor
@justadram - fanfic tag
Janina
@talesfromlissom - Masterlist
@disturbedbeautywrites - Masterlist
@homicidal-slvt - Masterlist
@marvelwitchergilmore - Masterlist
@minefield-of-a-ninja & @thoughtslikeaminefield - Masterlist
@hintsofhoney - Masterlist
@tom-whore-dleston - Masterlist
@rizlowwritessortof - Masterlist
@dean-winchester-is-a-warrior - Masterlist
@nesnejwritings - Masterlist
@coffee-obsessed-writer - Masterlist
@heavysighing-dreamyeyes - Masterlist
@cevansbaby-dove - Masterlist
@embarrasingmf - Masterlist
@raz-writes-the-thing - Masterlist
@caystar13star
@fierypen37
@dollfacefantasy - Masterlist
@lamentationsofalonelypotato - Masterlist
@iriel3000
@spnbaby-67
@bullet-prooflove - Masterlist
@lila-lou - Masterlist
@thing-you-do-with-that-thing - Masterlist
@jayankles - Masterlist
@itsqueenofchains
@romancingromanoff
@queen-of-deans-booty - Masterlist
@sofreddie - Masterlist
@justagirlinafandomworld - Masterlist
@vivilove-jonsa
@periwinkle39
@figthoughts
@cheynovak - Masterlist
@hischrrypie - Masterlist
@stxrrylunatic - Masterlist
@anundyingfidelity - Masterlist
@kittykatknits
@oberynmartell - Masterlist
@elvensorceress - Masterlist
@starfilmz
@deanwinchesterswitch - Masterlist
@emeraldcas
@stusbunker - Masterlist
@supernaturalneurodivergentwolf - Masterlist (1 | 2)
@eclecticqueennerd - Masterlist
@apocalypseornaw - Masterlist
@herstarburststories
@lilacliquors - Masterlist
@one-more-offbeat-anthem - Writing list
@sinnabonka
@you-cant-spell-subtext-without
@justsmilestuffhappens
@waywardxwords - Masterlist
@thisisapaige - Masterlist
@fazedlight - Masterlist
@quietlyimplode - Masterlist
@sethsclearwater - Masterlist
@ineedmorefanfics2 - Masterlist
@chaoticdean - Writing list
@galaxycastiel
@ellen-of-oz - Writing list
@tearsofgrace
@gnbrules
@shadowtriovibes - Masterlist
@babygirlwolverine - Masterlist
@crashdevlin - Masterlist
@roonyxx - Masterlist
@sams-sass - Masterlist
@imagineteamfreewill - Masterlist
@supernaturalfreewill - Masterlist
@jay-and-dean - Masterlist
@wormstacheangel
@writtenmemxries - Masterlist
@bloodsigilsandpie
@starwarsprincess1986
@woodswit
@spotsandsocks - Masterlist
@matan4il - Masterlist
@clusterbuck - Masterlist
@woodchoc-magnum
@littlespoonevan - Writing list
@jensengirl83 - Masterlist
@scripted-downfall
@forthewomenonly - Masterlist
@wisefoxluminary
@writethelifeyouwant - Masterlist
@teddyeyeseddie - Masterlist
@orchid-heart
@talesmaniac89 - Masterlist
Page 2
Thank you so much for including me on this list with so many amazing writers!!
October Reading Recs
To show some love and appreciation to all the amazing writers here on tumblr, who take the time to give us all these incredible stories (for free), allowing us to escape into these worlds. Here are all the fantastic fics I've read this month. 💖
Many of these fics and blogs are 18+ only, and NSFW please heed the author's individual fic warnings and requests regarding no minors. I am not responsible for your media consumption.
Reading Recs Masterlist
Dark Angel
Alec McDowell
Basic Instinct @zepskies
Authors Summary: You and Alec adapt to the realities of a human/transgenic relationship, especially during your pregnancy.
The Boys
Soldier Boy
Wanderlust @zepskies
Authors Summary: Your wandering hands are keeping Ben up at night.
Old Flame @wayward-dreamer
Authors Summary: Y/N never expected that a knock at her door late at night would result in a reunion with Soldier Boy, someone she long thought to be dead. The meeting gets off to a rocky start, but when certain truths come to light, some unexpected feelings come along with them.
Kinktober day seventeen: dirty talk @lilacliquors
Supernatural
Dean Winchester
Cursed to Karaoke (Masterlist) @flamencodiva
Authors Summary: Dean and Y/N get hit with a spell on a witch hunt. What happens when they don’t realize the spell has taken effect?
Remembrance of Things Past @sams-sass
Authors Summary: You and Dean find each other again.
No Good Deed Goes Unpunished @queen-of-deans-booty
Authors Summary: One good deed turns into your worst nightmare, one that you can’t stop from coming.
Unexpected Arrival @jensengirl83
Authors Summary: Dean thinks Y/N will be gone for a few more days on a hunt. What will she find when she comes back early to surprise him?
Everything Has Changed @impala-dreamer
Authors Summary: Sometimes, the person you fight alongside is also the person you with the most. And sometimes all that fighting is hiding other feelings, other desires...
Choose your own Winchester
Lifting the Veil @thoughtslikeaminefield
Authors Summary: You’ve been missing something of paramount importance - until now.
Sam Winchester
What he doesn't know @pamwritessometimes
Authors Summary: You’re hiding two dangerous secrets from Sam. Little did you know, he’s just uncovered one, but it’s not the one you think.
Nonstop | Drabble @saxxxology
Untitled Sam Winchester fic @supernaturalfreewill
Inherited Spirits @kittenofdoomage
Authors Summary: Your life changes with the revelation of a secret, but is it for the better?
Escape (Masterlist) @impala-dreamer
Authors Summary: Y/N and Dean are abducted after a night at the bar and thrown into a maze of horrors. Can Sam track down his brother and girlfriend in time? Can they even hold on that long?
Multi Fandom
Dean Winchester, Beau Arlen, Soldier Boy (Ben), Jason Teague
Headcanon: Sleepwalking @zepskies
Authors Summary: HC: How Dean, Beau, Soldier Boy (Ben), and Jason would react to you sleepwalking.
Walker
Cordell Walker
Dating Cordell Walker would include @peachyaliien
Big Sky
Beau Arlen
Right Here @daughterofcain-67
Authors Summary: after getting dumped by a guy you'd been talking to, you decided there wasn't much of a point in looking for love. You were better off just staying home and drinking while watching your comfort shows. well... perhaps the sheriff may be able to change your mind.
Midnight Mischief @waynes-multiverse
Authors Summary: Leaving Cassie’s Halloween party, the way home leads to a thrilling detour under the moonlight for Sheriff Arlen.
Thank you so very much for the rec!!
Unexpected Arrival
Dean x reader
Word Count-3490
Warnings- SMUT, fluff, language, sub!Dean
Summary- Dean thinks Y/N will be gone for a few more days on a hunt. What will she find when she comes back early to surprise him?
A/N- This fills the square "What happened to your hair?" for @jacklesversebingo. Also, a big thank you to my amazing beta @pink-sparkly-witch. Thank you for the encouragement and great feedback on my fics.
This has been on my Patreon for a few weeks. If you'd like to join and get access to my ficus weeks before they come to Tumblr, you can join my Patreon here. I have multiple tiers with different perks starting at $3 a month!
Y/N was exhausted. She’d been on a hunt for over a week that should’ve taken three days. All she wanted now was to get back to the bunker, back to Dean. It had been one of the few times they had hunted separately, and she’d missed him terribly. He and Sam had been out on their own hunt because she had wanted to take a slight break, but that changed when another hunter called, needing help to eliminate a werewolf pack. So, that’s why she was now tired, frustrated, and wanting nothing more than a hot shower and cuddling with her boyfriend.
The closer Y/N got to the bunker, the more her tension seemed to ebb away. As the miles raced away under her tires, she couldn’t help but smile a little. Just the thought of getting closer to Dean with every minute that passed helped with her frustration of being gone so long. He thought she would be gone a few more days, but luckily, she and her partner had found the pack and decimated it quicker than anticipated. She’d thought about calling and letting him know she was returning but decided to surprise him instead.
Finally, the bunker was in her sights. She sighed in relief as she made her way to the garage, parked her car, and got out, stretching her sore and aching muscles. She threw her duffle over her shoulder and began the trek to the war room, hoping that Dean would be there, wanting to see the surprise on his face when she walked in. But, as she took her first steps into the room, he was nowhere to be seen. Instead, Sam stood there, his own duffle slung over his shoulder.
“Hey, Sam,” she greeted, “Are you heading out?”
“Hey, Y/N,” he returned her greeting, “Yeah, Jody needs help with a vamp’s nest.”
“Don’t you ever take a break? How long have you guys been back, anyway?”
“We got back a couple of days ago. I’ve had time to rest,” he chuckled at her worry. She was always making sure they were taken care of.
“Okay, just please be careful, and let us know how it’s going. Do you know where Dean is?”
“He said something about going to watch a movie and relax. He’s been looking forward to you coming home. You know how Dean is; he won’t outwardly say it, but he really missed you,” Sam smiled, patting her on the shoulder as he walked past, heading for the garage.
“I missed him. That’s why I didn’t call. I wanted to surprise him,” she exclaimed gleefully. The thought of his excitement at seeing her made her stomach swim with butterflies.
“He’ll definitely be surprised. I’ll see you when I get back. It shouldn’t be more than a few days.”
“Be safe,” she told him, leaning up to kiss his cheek as he left, leaving her alone in the war room.
Once Sam was gone, she threw her things on the war room table, stretching her muscles again before she started her journey down the hall to her and Dean’s shared room. The excitement of knowing they had the bunker to themselves for a few days put a pep in her step. She was going to try to convince Dean to take this time to spend it together. No hunts, no outside distractions. Just the two of them lounging around, watching movies, spending long overdue quality time together. It wasn’t often that they were the only ones home. Sam was rarely not there with them or in the front seat of the Impala on their hunts. So, she wanted to take full advantage of the time they could have together the next few days.
As she got closer to their room, the thoughts of everything they could do while alone made her want to giggle like a little girl. She loved that green-eyed hunter down the hall more than she could ever describe. It had taken a while, but she finally managed to get him to fully let her in and open up to her in ways that he hadn’t with anyone else, which made her love for him grow exponentially. But all thoughts ceased as she got to their doorway. The sound of a grunt coming from the cracked door made her stop in her tracks. Was he okay? Was he in pain? She rushed the last few steps to the room, peeking in, but what she saw froze her in her spot. Dean was lying in their bed, hand under the sheets, head thrown back in ecstasy.
“Yes, Y/N, God, it feels so good,” he groaned, his hand visibly stroking his hard length.
She couldn’t help but stare, the sight making her weak in the knees and that familiar heat growing between her legs. The sound of a woman moaning brought her back to the present. For a split second, her heart dropped, but then she realized it was coming from the porn he was watching. Her eyes broke from Dean to the screen, and what she witnessed gave her an idea.
“So, how much does it turn you on to watch her be in control?” she questioned seductively, announcing her presence and making Dean jump in surprise.
“Y/N! I-I, uh, how long have you been back?” he stuttered, quickly moving his hand away, flustered that he had been caught.
“Long enough to see that you’re having a pretty good time there, handsome,” she quipped, turning her eyes back to the screen where the woman was clearly dominating her partner, “But you didn’t answer my question. How turned on are you to see a woman being dominant?”
“I, well, uh,” he continued to stumble through his words as he reached for the remote control to turn off the movie.
“Uh uh. Leave it on,” she demanded authoritatively, slowly stripping off her flannel as she moved closer to the bed. She watched as he quivered at her tone. “Now, answer me.”
“It turns me on,” he mumbled quickly, barely audible.
“Oh, come on,” she chastised, now down to her underwear as she stood beside the bed, “You can do better than that.”
“Fine, it really turns me on,” he said sheepishly, eyes cast down, not wanting to see her expression at his admission.
She smirked, her tiredness ebbing away and turning into a burning desire for the man sitting before her. If that turned him on, she would give him something he’d never forget. But she had to make sure it was something he wanted. They’d always been good about trying new things, but only if both were up for it. So, placing her fingers under his chin, tilting his face to look at her, she smiled down at him.
“You want me to do it? Want me to dominate you?”
“Are you serious?” he asked, his cock twitching at the thought that one of his secret fantasies may be coming to life.
She grabbed his face between her fingers a little roughly, pulling his face closer to hers as she leaned down to look into his eyes, “Do I look like I’m joking?”
Before she knew what was happening, he had her pulled down into his lap, his mouth covering hers in a bruising kiss, his tongue swiping against her bottom lip, asking for entrance. She let him run the show for a minute, but when she felt him start grinding his hips up against hers, she pulled away, making him whine.
“Now, here’s how it’s going to go. You’re going to listen to what I tell you, and if you disobey, I stop, understand?” she stated, watching his pupils dilate, almost completely taking over the emerald green of his eyes.
“Yes, I understand.”
“Yes, what?” she asked, grabbing his hair, tugging harshly, his body shaking with want.
“Yes, ma’am!” he exclaimed excitedly. She was going to ruin him, and he was all for it.
“Good. Now, you can touch me only when I say you can, and you cannot touch yourself at all. Are you sure you want this?” she asked one more time, ensuring he really wanted this.
“Yes, I want it. Y/N, I promise I’ll tell you if it’s too much,” he smiled up at her. She always worried about him and his well-being. That’s one of the many reasons he loved her.
“Alright. Then get ready to have your mind blown, big boy,” she winked, slowly beginning to grind down against him, his hands instinctively grabbing her hips.
“What did I just say about touching,” she scolded, moving off his lap and standing beside the bed.
“I’m sorry! It’s just instinct! I won’t do it again!” he almost begged. He wanted, no needed, to feel her against him again.
“Dean…I have to punish you for that. Maybe you’ll learn to listen.”
“No, please, baby. I need to feel you. God, I’ve missed feeling you,” he whined, reaching out to touch her but remembering and pulling his hand back, dropping it in his lap.
“Shh, babe. You’ll feel me, just not right now. Now, scoot up,” she motioned for him to move so she could sit behind him on the bed as she removed the rest of her clothes. He obliged, but not without a pout.
“Ahh, are you pouting, Dean? Good boys don’t pout. Don’t you want to be a good boy and get the rewards they get?” she whispered in his ear as she ran her hands down his arms, moving over to his abdomen, making his muscles tense and then release.
“Yes, God. I’ll be good,” he grunted as she scraped her nails up and down his stomach.
“That’s what I want to hear. Now, lean back,” she instructed him to lean his body back against hers, his head on her shoulder as her hands continued to roam.
“Baby…” he began to utter his pleas, but she moved her finger up to his mouth to quiet him.
“You hear that? Do you hear the sounds she’s making? Does that turn you on, Dean? Will you let me use you to make myself feel that good, huh? Let me ride you until I come so hard, squeeze around you so tight,” she whispered in his ear, nudging his head to look at the movie, his breath hitching in his throat as her hands moved all around where he wanted her to touch him. It was tortuous, but he couldn’t deny that he was turned on more than he had been in a long time. The thought of her using him to get her pleasure made him hard as a rock. He couldn’t contain the loud moan that escaped him.
“That’s it. Let me hear you, babe. Such a good boy for me,” she cooed, feeling his body shiver with need. It made her want him even more, her body reacting. She ground herself against his backside, needing friction. “You feel how wet I am, Dean? Damn, I can’t wait to feel you inside me, filling me up so good, filling me up the way only your big cock can.”
“Y/N, baby, please! I can’t take anymore. I need you so bad. Please, please…” he began to beg, the need to feel her wrapped around him, controlling all his senses.
“Already begging? Does my good boy need me, need to come for me?”
“Yes! I need you so bad. I’ve missed you and how you feel. Please, baby,” he pleaded, fists clenching the sheets beside him, her hands still teasing him, “I’m not going to last if you keep teasing me!”
She smirked at his desperation. What she wasn’t going to admit was that seeing him that turned on and begging for her was slowly chipping away at her restraint. Being away from him and not feeling him for over a week made her body thrum with the need for him, too. She slid from behind him and motioned for him to scoot back against the headboard. Once he was positioned where she wanted him, she climbed back into his lap.
“I’m going to give you what you want, Dean, but remember, hands to yourself until I say otherwise. Got it?” she made sure the rules were clear as she slowly ground herself against him, his tip catching her swollen clit, bringing low moans out of her.
“No touching, got it. Just please, sweetheart, stop teasing me and let me feel you,” he groaned as the feeling of her pussy, warm and slick, grinding against him slowly drove him insane.
“That’s not how this works. You wanted me to dominate you, right? That means you get what I give you when I want to give it. Understand?” she said, pulling his hair, causing his head to tilt back to look up at her.
“Yes, yes, I understand.”
“Yes, what, Dean?” she smirked as she rolled her hips again and watched his eyes roll back.
“Yes, ma’am! God, Y/N, you’re killing me…”
“Oh, but what a pleasurable death it will be,” she moaned in his ear as she lifted herself, grabbing his cock and lining it up with her entrance, dropping down to take all of him in one motion.
Dean couldn’t stop the scream that tore from his throat as he felt her heat surround him suddenly. He had to twist the sheets tighter in his grip to prevent his hands from grabbing her hips, making her bounce on him fast and hard, but he had asked her to dominate him, so he had to follow the rules, even though he thought it might be the death of him.
Dean shut his eyes and gritted his teeth. It was taking all his willpower not to finish before her. He had never been dominated like this before, and he loved it. The feeling of her tight pussy taking him to the hilt, and the sexy moans leaving her as she chased her end, were driving him mad. He wanted to grab her hips and help her move against him, but he knew he couldn’t.
Y/N watched Dean’s eyes flutter shut, his knuckles turning white from his grip on the sheets, his teeth indenting his bottom lip as he sucked into his mouth, trying to contain the many noises that wanted to bubble up and out of him, but she wasn’t having that. She pulled his lip from his teeth with her thumb, his eyes shooting open from the contact as she began to grind slowly in his lap.
“No, Dean. No keeping quiet. Let me hear all those beautifully sinful noises I plan to draw out of you,” she told him as she began to move faster, the sexiest whimper she’d ever heard leaving past his lips, “Yes, that’s it, that’s my good boy. I’ll have you screaming my name before I’m done.”
“God, Y/N…y-you feel so damn good. R-riding me so fucking good. Please, let me touch you. I need to touch you,” he begged, the restraint of not touching starting to become too much.
“Does my good boy want to touch me?” she felt his whole body shudder at the praise, making her smile. Had she known that praising him would get that kind of reaction, she would’ve done it much sooner, “Okay, Dean. Since you’ve been good, you can touch me.”
As soon as the words left her mouth, his hands were on her hips, his grip almost bruising, his hips meeting hers as he pulled her up and down on him. She ran her hands into his hair, grasping it in handfuls as she continued to ride him hard, making him moan loudly. The sounds he was making made her clench around him, which, in turn, made him moan loudly again. It was a cycle that was quickly driving them both towards their ends.
“Sweetheart, you gotta hurry. I can’t hold it much longer,” he growled through clenched teeth, the vein in his neck protruding out in his effort to hold back.
“Be a good boy and make me come, then,” she demanded, her legs starting to shake with the exertion.
Dean reached down between them, rubbing her clit in harsh circles as he thrust up into her as hard as he could. He knew she was getting close as he felt her begin to flutter and clench around him even more. A few more circles on her nub, and she was gone, falling over the edge, screaming his name as one of the most intense orgasms she ever had rushed through her. He grabbed her hips, pistoning up at a faster pace for a few seconds before her orgasm triggered his. He stilled deep within her, shouting her name as he shook all over, filling her up.
She collapsed against his chest, his hands instinctively running up and down her back slowly. They sat there silently, trying to catch their breaths for a few minutes before Y/N giggled. The motion of her body moving made him hiss. His softening length was sensitive from one of the strongest orgasms he’d ever had. Y/N sat up abruptly, making him groan.
“Oh, God. Did I hurt you?” she asked, her eyes wide with worry.
“No, sweetheart, I’m fine,” he chuckled, “I’m just a little sensitive, and when you started to laugh, it made you move on him. And I do believe he’s down for the count for a while.”
“Are you saying that little Dean isn’t up for playing anymore?” she laughed as he rolled his eyes.
“One, don’t call him that, and two, yes, he’s done for the night. Sweetheart, you damn near killed me,” he groaned as she started to wiggle in his lap, teasing him. He helped her move from his lap to sit beside him on the bed.
“So, I take it that means you enjoyed it?”
“Enjoyed it? Y/N, baby, that was indescribable. I’m just sorry I didn’t ask for that sooner.”
“Well, I’m happy I could be of service,” she stood from the bed and curtsied, causing Dean to burst out in full-body laughter.
“You’re something else, sweetheart,” he whispered, pulling her closer and kissing her hard, “Now, how about we talk about the roles being reversed sometime?”
“You want to dominate me?” she asked, putting her finger on her chin like she was contemplating, “I do believe that’d be fun.”
“Then we’ll have to make plans for that, but first, I’m fucking starving. Let’s go to the kitchen, make us a snack, and then we come back here and watch a movie.”
“Another movie?” she questioned with a smirk, gesturing to the TV where the porn was still playing.
“Damn it, woman. A real movie, not the sexy kind,” he huffed, grabbing the remote and turning off the TV before slapping her on the ass, “Now, about that snack?”
She laughed as they threw on their pajamas and made their way down the hall toward the kitchen. As they got closer, a sound made them freeze. Dean motioned for her to get behind him as they tiptoed around the corner, their bodies relaxing when they saw it was just Sam.
“Hey guys, Jody called as I was about thirty minutes from here and told me they had taken care of the nest, so I didn’t have to go after all." He was explaining why he was there when he stopped and stared, “What happened to your hair? You look like Sonic the Hedgehog.”
Y/N couldn’t contain the fits of laughter. She was doubled over, holding her sides as Dean looked on with his best bitchface. Her hands pulling on his hair had made it stick up in all different directions. Sam spoke again as she finally started calming down, sending her into another fit of giggles.
“You know what, I don’t want to know. From the looks of you both, I know why, and now I wish I could bleach the image from my mind.”
“Well, Sammy,” Dean smirked, pulling Y/N to his side, “What can I tell you? I aim to please.”
“Excuse me. Who was doing the pleasing this time?” Y/N grinned, poking Dean in the chest.
“Oh, God. I’m going to my room. I don’t want to hear this!” Sam groaned, leaving the kitchen.
“Be glad you weren’t here thirty minutes ago, or you’d have heard plenty!” Y/N shouted at his retreating form as she and Dean started cackling.
Sam groaned again as he walked away. A thought crossed his mind as he heard them continue to laugh as he made it further down the hallway.
“If I didn’t love them, I’d go back in there and stab them to death,” he mumbled to himself as he walked into his room and slammed the door, hoping he wouldn’t hear anything else from them the rest of the night.
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Holy bloody hell!!! 😳🥵😈🔥🫠
This is beautiful!!! And so smutty!!!!
Thank you so much! 💖I'm so glad you liked it!
