.fatal petal.

Song 'Ace' Jihyo | 33 | Thief/Hitman ‘if you are made of thorns my dear, then i will be your flower petals—’

[jongkook-mi-blog]

.so we escaped the weight of darkness

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkookmi‌:

He wasn’t sure if that resigned sigh hurt more than an argument would have, how quietly she accepted death and hurt, like there was no other choice for them anymore. He held her close without hesitation, gathering her carefully in his arms and running his fingers through her soft hair.

He wondered – how long? Forever he’d thought once, when the world made it clear at every turn that there was no other path for a man like him, that the universe had made up its mind about him and there was no escaping. He thought he’d never be anything else but this kind of monster, this kind of man, that there was no other choice for him. He hadn’t taken any joy in it, but it was better to be in control, to do a bad thing good, than to be defeated, helpless, lost.

But then Jihyo came into his life and… and it seemed possible now, to be something else. To be something better.

He pressed a gentle kiss to her hair, taking a decision.

“Let’s quit. After this job, however it ends, let’s quit. Let’s go wherever we want and do whatever we want.”

He shrugs lightly.

“I could open a gym. Or a restaurant.”

He could do anything, as long as she stayed with him.

She rests comfortably against his chest, time ticking by as she contemplates over the meaning of his words. Saying she wasn’t surprised would be a lie, but the shocking factor soon disappears once she is aware he’s doing it for her.

If someone ask whether she regretted her decision back then to stay with him, the answer is clearly and absolutely a no, even with all the not so lawful things they had to do in order to survive. Afterall she willingly gave her whole heart to him and she couldn’t imagine having a life without him. Maybe her life would have taken a different route if they hadn’t crossed each other’s path, nonetheless she was grateful they did.

A smile graces upon her face as she hugs him tighter.

“We could open a gym and a restaurant.” she hums brightly. “Side by side, because you get hungry after exercising, right?” He could manage the gym and she could manage the restaurant. That way she could get to see him even when they’re working. 

“But before that let’s have a long vacation. I have things on the bucket list to cross off and so much scenery I want to see with you.”

[jongkook-mi-blog]

[[ these inconvenient fireworks ]]

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkookmi‌:

He frowned slightly at her comment. How could she say that so easily, that he chased her out – as if she was his girlfriend, not his captive, as if she was here by free will, not because he made this home her prison. How could he explain his intentions? Would it even matter if he did?

Did she truly think he just kicked her out because he felt like it? Because it was a sudden whim he decided to indulge. Poor impulsive management? It was almost too absurd to not be a joke, but she looked dead serious.

He studied her face for a moment, but then decided to stay silent. He didn’t think he had the right words, and their feelings about her stay here clearly weren’t the same. So instead he nodded. “I swear,” he promised solemnly.

It’s been a few months but the repercussion of the abduction never quite went away. If anything it only served to worsen the occasion nightmares she had before, occurring too often for her to be able to manage on her own and thus taking a toll on her mental state — the obvious dark circles under her eyes and loss of appetite despite her favourite dishes. That one time she botched up her job and almost got in trouble, she came to the conclusion she wasn’t suitable to take up any assignment until she solved her insomnia and frequent nightmares, and she has no idea how long that would take.  

Tossing and turning until she found a comfortable position, she stares up at the ceiling, trying to force herself to sleep. Yet when she does, the shadows of horror would come creeping up, causing her to open her eyes in a jumble of sweats, tears and screams. Already two nights in a row without sleep and even pills weren’t helping much. 

Resigning to fate, she got up and shuffles quietly towards his room, where the door is open as always, ever since that incident. Eyes locked on the sleeping figure, she limits her movement as much as possible, not wanting to wake him up as she crawls underneath the blanket and occupies near the edge of the large bed. 

She hates that she still relies on him so much, that the only way to have a decent sleep is with him around. She hates that he’s like a drug she couldn’t quit from, that she chose to stay with him despite given the choice because it somehow hurts to be away from him and she couldn’t understand why. Or maybe she does but is subconsciously denying it. She is afraid. Scared. Because there is no way her heart would survive another betray, another empty promise. She couldn’t afford another risk, she should stay away from him.

Yet, here she is.

[jongkook-mi-blog]

.so we escaped the weight of darkness

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkookmi: 

He turned his head slightly to obscure the fond smile tugging at his lips as Jihyo answered in exactly the way he expected. She was always fiercely protective of the things she called hers, a force of nature that could destroy as easily as she could heal. Her first reaction was always heads-on, but she’d reign herself in for those she loved.

“Softer, then,” he agreed easily.

Her next question caught him slightly off guard and settled a sense of worry in his bones. She knew very well what he would do with the boy if Salvatore’s demands aren’t met. There is only two ways this story ever ends and the only exception her ever made and will make to that rule was her. There will be no one else like her, she is the only chance he would ever take.

He looked back up, meeting her eyes.

“I’ll do what I did with the others. I’ll kill him.”

He studied her expression silently for a moment.

“You know I have to.”

She isn’t sure why she even bothered to ask that question. She knows very well what Salvatore’s demands are — one of the reasons she doesn’t want to join nor does Jongkook ever allow her to join any of the gangs to gather intel because she would lose the freedom to choose. His protection might be unable to reach her in time in other gangs’ territory.

“I know…” she sighs silently. Between Jongkook and an unfamiliar guy she has no attachment to, it’s obvious who she would choose. She just hope the lad’s father would give in and Jongkook wouldn’t need to kill him. She has enough guilt as it is towards Joongki.

Spacing out, she abandons the food altogether, unable to find her appetite for it any longer.

“Oppa,” she calls softly, turning to wrap her arms around him and taking in his soothing scent, as a jumble of helplessness and exhaustion wash over her.

“How long do we have to do this,” she mumbles against his chest, not as a question because she knows she won’t be able to get an answer. She is sick of drawing blood and seeing lives ending in front of her, of having to worry about Jongkook every time he’s out for mission. The wish of wanting to live a simple life with her loved one seems so far away and unreachable. The hatred towards her father and desire to see him suffer in agony is just insignificant compared to Jongkook.

[jihyoxmi-blog]

➤ flayed into shape

[jihyoxmi-blog]

onewxmi:

The words cut through his heart like a sharp knife. Years he tried to deny it, but it was the truth that rolled from her lips. He lived the lie for so long, he no longer thought about what he was lying for. Never being faced with the danger himself, he never believed his father’s stories. To him, it was all just a simple trick from his old man to get rid of the family that was corrupting his career.

Perhaps he was too invested in the situation, lived it too long, tried to escape it too many times to be a proper judge of it. She was a bystander whose judgements might be more correct than his. He was his father’s son, no matter how much he tried to deny it, and his father was a man with many enemies, no matter how much good he pretended to do.

“I never wanted to put them in danger,” he breathed out.

Horrible images of his loved ones being hurt and tortured flooded his mind. His mother bound to a chair. His friends being questioned. Joongki covered in blood and bruises. All because they were involved with him.

“I might be interesting to you because of my father’s position, but those people are innocent,” his voice broke. “Please don’t hurt them.”

“Yet, that doesn’t mean they won’t,” she points out, tone sharp and laced with harsh reality of the cruel world. They say ignorance is bliss, but sometimes it may just be the kiss of death. Maybe the younger her would have been happier not knowing anything, but that would have resulted in a suffering life full of nothing but lies.

“Even without me there would be plenty of others wanting to make use of you. How long has your father been in the SPD? How many enemies do you think he has made all these years? You are your father’s son, his blood runs in you. There is never going to be peace in your life if I’d say so.” Unless he fakes death and live on with a new identity, cutting ties with everything of past that are his parents and friends. Even then that isn’t failproof.

“Your father might be able to protect you, but can your father protect your friends and loved ones?” She asks nonchalantly, tapping her fingers on her knee and trying to gauge his reactions.

“You… have a boyfriend, don’t you.” It was a statement, not a question. One which she had to keep her emotions in check as not to reveal too much. Thank god for the mask she has over her face or he would be able to see traces of disgruntlement and straight up annoyance on her.

[jihyoxmi-blog]

➤ beneath an orange sky

[jihyoxmi-blog]

mixjoongki: 

Leading with that had been the wrong choice. Joongki knew it the instant her smile disappeared, the way her hand tensed, just a little. The quiet that stretched between them made him want to grip her hand harder, so she couldn’t disappear again. Because now that she was here—now that he knew she was alive—the last thing he wanted to do was to ever let her go.

He felt a small twinge of relief when Jihyo said she knew about her mother’s death, that she was present for the cremation. At least he hadn’t been the bearer of bad news. A hundred questions bubbled up inside him when she said she knew things he didn’t (did she know what her father considered business?), but he managed to settle his fear enough that when she pulled her had away to pass out the menus, he let go.

Reluctantly, still afraid she would stop existing if he didn’t keep her within his sight at all times, but he let go of her hand and accepted the menu she offered him. He tried to smile, but it didn’t fit as well as it should have. “I missed it, too. I tried, once, without you. It wasn’t the same.”

Nothing had been the same without her. Of all the things he had wanted to ask, one question was now rising to the top, above all the others. He clenched his jaw to keep it from slipping past his teeth and forced himself to look down at the menu. Joongki tried to keep his voice light, but it didn’t feel any more convincing than his smile. “I’d like the pork belly. You?”

She doesn’t look up, flipping through the menu in a too nonchalant way because she didn’t know what to say back to him. She is sorry for all that happened, but things can’t return back to how it was just because they want to. Nothing is ever the same. People change. Life goes on. But she knows the protective streak in her over Joongki never went away, even if at one point she managed to get it buried under all the intense hatred she has for their father and anyone remotely related.

“I’ll get a serving of all these each,” she gestures to the variety of meat listed on the menu. “I couldn’t decide which one so let’s just get all. My treat, so eat as much as you wish to.” She smiles, this time a genuine one from the bottom of her heart. If she had to pinpoint one thing that didn’t change much, it’s her ultimate love for good food.

“Tea or water?” She asks as she pours herself a cup of tea once the waitress left the private room with their order. Jongkook’s preference over things had more influence on her than she realised, because tea is the least of all the beverages she would have chose in the past. And she didn’t order soju or beer to go along, plainly because she has to drive back later on, and Jongkook will know if he finds her reeking of alcohol.

She takes slow sips of the hot tea, even as a growing tension spread over the room.

“Joongki-ah,” she speaks, making sure she has his attention. “The fact that I’m alive, keep it to yourself and tell no one, not even your mom or that guy.” It’s not as if Joongki would go around blabbing, and honestly it doesn't matter even if their father knows she’s still alive all these time, but it certainly isn’t the ideal timing right now.

[jihyoxmi-blog]

➤ flayed into shape

[jihyoxmi-blog]

onewxmi:

The noodles tasted like the most expensive dish in a five star restaurant in comparison to the plain rice he had been served since he was abducted. He enjoyed every bite, letting the noodles melt on his tongue and the sauce mix in his mouth. He wished to eat calmly and peacefully, but her words made him shiver. He worried what the talk would entail.

Did he seriously have some information the kidnappers needed or wanted that he did not even know he treasured? Or did she hope he could help them with a certain aspect of the negotiations? He was sure he would be a disappointment in any case.

Unfortunately, the bowl was not a magical plate that refilled itself and after 10 to 15 minutes Jinki finished the last strings of noodles and the last spoonful of black bean sauce. He cleaned the bowl until it looked like nothing had been served in it in the first place. If it wasn’t inappropriate he would have licked the bowl clean.

“You said you wanted to talk,” Jinki said after shoving the bowl across the table toward the female. “What do you want to talk about? I guess it’s not just small talk since you already know quite a lot about me and I’m sure you won’t tell much about yourself. Do you even have a nickname I can call you? It’s awkward to speak to someone without having a clue how to address them.”

For the last fifteen minutes as she waited patiently for him to finish his noodles, she watched him in silence, the slight scrunch of brows never leaving her face once. Not because the lad had a horrible eating habit, but because she was contemplating ways to approach him with the topic without letting out too much information. He can’t and mustn't know her connection with Joongki.

She looked at him for a minute or two, not answering immediately on purpose.

“Noona is fine, if you really need to address me.” In the world of gang she is known as ‘Ace’, but even letting him know that could be risky due to his father’s position in the police force. And she doesn’t felt like it to come up with a random nickname on the spot. Why is this kid so troublesome to the point of asking her for her nickname though? She doesn’t know whether to label him as daring or just plain foolish.

“Have you ever consider that because of your father, as much as you deny it, people close to you are undeniably going to be put in danger as well?” She points out, speaking indifferently even though her words sound like she’s threatening him.

[jongkook-mi-blog]

.so we escaped the weight of darkness

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkookmi: 

Jongkook raised a disaproving eyebrow, giving a pointed look at her food. She was eating for god’s sake, why would she say such crude things? “You could’ve just said boyfriend,” he muttered under his breath, knowing that wasn’t the point.

Anyway.

He gave her a small grin at her protective streak. He had watched her cut ties with her old life for years, sudden and vicious and gradually and reluctant. He’d seen her transform from a sequestered girl to a head-strong woman. He trusted her because he knew she wouldn’t look back, she never had.

The only thing she’d ever held onto was her brother. He knew she would do anything for him, even if he didn’t know where she was. He’d helped her look after him in all the ways they could, so this – Well, this was messy.

“So, does that mean I punch him harder or softer?”

“I heard that.” She gave him a side glance. “Boyfriend is a term I’ll use if I acknowledge that whiny boy in the room, but I have yet to.” Does that boy think being her younger brother’s boyfriend is easy? No way of course. And who knows if it’s just a fling or long lasting relationship anyway. But she will punch that boy in the face if he dare to break Joongki’s heart.

“Harder,” she responds without even thinking, but then frowns after that as she looks at Jongkook up and down, and even reaches over to pat his arm muscles a few times.

“But he looks so fragile though what if you break his bones?” Because no matter how she looks it seems like Jongkook would be able to crush Jinki’s spine with merely an arm. That boy is too weak. How is she going to trust that boy to protect Joongki? His status now as a small, unknown lawyer isn’t going to help much at all. 

“Forget it. Punch him softer on the account of Joongki,” she muses. It pains her whenever Jongkook gets injured, no doubt Joongki would be sad too if he sees Jinki in suffering.

“What are you going to do with him if his father doesn’t give in?”

[jihyoxmi-blog]

➤darker than the night

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jinxmi:

Over the years Jin has consolidated his control over his identity. He considers himself a master at controlling his expressions, at hiding his feelings. However, the appearance of the newcomer takes him by surprise, and well, he’s never been one for jump scares. It takes all of his control not to jump at the sight of the man, but he fights his reflexes so all that shows is a widening of his eyes, the barely noticeable intake of a breath. He doesn’t want to draw any attention. Not out here, alone, with two dangerous strangers. 

He exhales slowly as the man fades back into the shadows, taking the body with him. Seriously, it’s like something out of a nightmare the way he disappears into the darkness. But their job is done now, right? The body has been taken care of, the money delivered. And he feels relieved. He just tries not to show it. She might still have a bullet planned for him at the end of the night. 

He hopes not. She’s kind of fun to tease. Also, dying like this would suck. 

He doesn’t say anything until they’re out of the shadow of the warehouse, mentally making a note of the location. If one of the gang bosses is using this warehouse as a pickup, it could be a good idea to investigate. He’ll get one of the Salvatore hackers to do a run on who owns the building, see if anything leads from there. “So, was that like…your boss, or just a client?” 

He bites his lip nervously. Most people don’t take that much notice of him, usually because he takes measures to appear amiable and harmless. However, the thought of some dangerous stranger who may have gang ties knowing his face from a body drop-off, that’s a different scenario altogether. Jin just hopes he doesn’t run into him on one of his own jobs again. Though, he muses, it’s nothing one of his special tablets in a drink wouldn’t be able to fix. 

He pushes these thoughts out of his head and cranes his neck to peep at the yellow envelope. “Aren’t you going to even check what’s in it? What if they’ve tried scamming you, or paying you less? I mean, I think someone would be foolish to try scamming an assassin but I’ve met a lot of fools in Seoul recently.”

“Try taking a guess, no prize even if you get it right though,” she spares him a brief glance as they head towards the van. She has yet to trust the lad to the point of revealing everything to him, as much as she’d like to respond to him with a ‘I’m my own boss’. And though he denies it, she doesn’t believe he’s just an innocent citizen who is not involved in some kind of shady business.

Just how much does one have to undergo in order to stay so calm in a situation they were in just minutes ago. Doesn’t one usually faint or freak out if they haven’t been through such stuff? She could still remember how much her hands trembled and how hard she breathed the first time she had her first kill. Not exactly the most pleasant experience.

“No point checking.” Because this is not the first time she’s doing business with that man and he ought to know better than to try scamming her. But whether or not the actual hiring party does tries to scam and pay less is none of her concern. “Even if they do, one bullet ends it all,” she flatly adds.

Reaching the front of the vehicle, she proceeds to rip off the thin sheet of number plate only to reveal a different one beneath it, and then doing the same with the other one before throwing them into the back of the van, along with the cap and mask she had removed. She looks back at him and raises her brows.

“You can keep the cap and mask for memento,” she jokes. Not that she would if she was him. “So where do I drop you off? Or would you like to join me for late night supper?” If he isn’t afraid of her she wouldn’t mind having company for supper. She’s starting to get hungry after all the work, and food she’s craving for would definitely leave Jongkook frowning after her. Might as well settle it outside before heading home.

[jongkook-mi-blog]

[[ these inconvenient fireworks ]]

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkookmi:

 He stayed quiet as she did, letting her think. There was a place somewhere deep inside his mind that was completely silent, a place he’d reached to many times during his fights with Hyeeun, during his nights in prison. There was nothing there, just absolute silence, the only thing that felt safe. He reached it now, waiting for her, not allowing himself to expecting something either way, not wishing for her to leave, not daring to hope for her to stay.

(She should be free of him, he is not a man who should be around others anymore. She should stay with him, he was the only one who could understand her now.)

And yet, when she speaks, his heart feels like it beats more strongly than it has in ages. It felt impossible, that when presented with her freedom, with no strings attached, no tragedy chaining her, that she would chose him. That she would chose him over a life, comfortable and free. That she would chose him at all. (How long, since someone picked him? Since someone wanted to stay with him?)

“Then please stay,” he says, his voice oddly soft.

His voice was uncharacteristically soft of him that if there weren’t anyone else in the apartment aside from them she would have thought it was someone else saying that. She looks back up at him, and it’s as if the weight of a boulder lifted off her chest when she didn’t see any display of reluctance on his face, or that it was against his wish to let her stay. Because if he did she’d rather leave than stay around to face him only to sorely remind herself just how unneeded she is in his life.

“And you can’t chase me out just because you felt like it,” she grouses, throwing her terms out to him. Who knows if he would suddenly go into one of his weird mood and chase her out again. He didn’t exactly kept his promise to her and there’s this voice inside her still bearing grudge against him. She’s not that magnanimous of a person and she stands with that.

“Swear to it, or else you’ll lose all your muscles and become a fat, bald man.” Hah. Surely he wouldn’t want that to happen to him if he didn’t keep his words. Death threats obviously aren’t going to work on someone like him, so it was the best suffering she could think of at the moment.

[jongkook-mi-blog]

[[ these inconvenient fireworks ]]

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkookmi:

He heard the gentle sound of Jihyo’s footfall, announcing her presence. He resisted the urge to tell her to be careful, to go back to bed, keeping his eyes instead on the food he was making – light dishes she wouldn’t have much trouble eating. For a few moments he just focused on the food, giving himself some time to steel him for what he needed to say.

He turned around, and wordlessly placed the food on the table for her. As she sat down and started eating, he took a seat as well, watching her for a moment. She always looked so peaceful when she ate, like the simple fact of being fed was enough to improve her mood.

(If she left, he’d miss the sight of this, and the thought is unexpected and unwanted.)

“Jihyo,” he starts. “You’re getting better, so there is something I wanted to say to you.

He showed her his phone, the first few seconds of the video he took of her and the other boy he had held hostage. He didn’t play much of it, certain she would remember. When she concentrated on him again, he deliberately deleted it.

“This was the last copy of that video. I can’t and won’t send it to anyone. You are free now. You’re free to leave and go anywhere you want, I won’t hold anything against you.”

He forced himself not to divert his eyes, to keep everything hidden behind the barrier that had kept him safe for so long.

“You are also free to stay here, if that is what you want. It’s your choice.” 

He said nothing, placing the food on the table for her. He never did, never spoke more than necessary and sometimes she wonders if he finds it a nuisance to actually talk. But she is used to it. She ate, quietly chewing her food until he spoke her name and she stiffened. An unbearable feeling gnawing its way through her like an omen. Now that she has somewhat recovered, is it time for her to leave? Is he going to chase her out and back to that place he decided for her?

She forced herself to focus when he showed her his phone, pupils dilating and blood draining from her already pale face at the video playing. Her grip tightened and she almost forgot to breathe. It wasn’t something she had wanted to be reminded of, locked up somewhere deeply in the back of her mind. She looked back at him, wanting to question his motive for showing her that, but he deleted the footage and she suddenly didn’t know how to react.

Emotions twirling around like a hurricane as she stares at him, trying to comprehend what just happened.

“You’re… not chasing me out?” She is unsure, the lack of security in her whole life makes it hard for her to believe. Being lied to too many times and unable to put her trust once again. He deleted the video. He has no blackmail material over her that could ruin her. She could leave and start a new life. But the thought of not seeing him again leaves an aching feeling in her heart.

“I… I want to stay.” Her gaze drifts from him to her unfinished food, unable to face him. She tells herself that it’s because she’s used to living here, and not because of him. That part of her nightmares involve him leaving her, not her family but him, and she didn’t want that to become reality.

[jongkook-mi-blog]

.so we escaped the weight of darkness

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkookmi:

He lets her take the food, pulling up a chair for her so she can at least sit down as she wolfs down the dish in front of her. He poured her a cup of tea and placed it near her food, leaning against the counter as he watched her. He just nodded simply at her question, knowing it was more rhetorical than anything – everything he did was always for her. He liked making food for her, how easy it was to cheer her up with the gesture, how grateful she was for it, always.

He studies her for a moment as she eats, because despite everything something feels… off. It isn’t like Jihyo is never involved in his cases, either, but her request was still rather unique. Why had she taken such interest in the Deputy’s boy?

“Everything all right?” he asked carefully, not out of trepidation for himself, but out of a want not to disturb her.

He hadn’t heard anything suspicious from the room and all in all, despite some sparks of sass, the boy was obedient. Even his remarks could hardly be called defiance and he had made no attempt at escaping or even lashing out. Jongkook had made sure the boy knew he was outclassed in that regard and that the only reason he was alive at all was because Jongkook allowed it. For now.

It seemed unlikely the boy could do anything to get to Jihyo or upset her, but something clearly had her worried. 

If she had to make a point about it, everything Jongkook did make her fall deeper in love with him. When he wordlessly make food for her, making sure she’s never starved, making things as comfortable as possible for her, pulling chair out for her, giving her his jacket when she’s cold — every little gestures he did without being prompted to. If his objective is to make it impossible for her to leave him then he has already succeeded, but she knows he’s doing it because he wants to, and with no hidden motive behind it.

She swallows the food and drinks the tea before looking up at him with a slight frown. “Yes, and no.”

Sighing to herself, she takes another sip of the tea before speaking again. “That sassy boy locked up in that room,” she shrugs with her shoulder, her face looking somewhat stiff as though she’s having constipation. “He’s involved with Joongki. You know, the kind that requires them to use lube in the future.”

The nerves of that boy tainting her younger brother like that. It felt like he had ran off with something precious she was protecting all these while. She is aware that Joongki is in every way an adult and knows what he’s doing, but it just pisses her in the wrong way somehow, as with an overprotective sister. Did it occur to her that Joongki might be the one who initiate the whole relationship? Yes, but Joongki is her brother and obviously everyone else is to blame. She is as guilty enough leaving him alone to fend against that bastard.

“Seriously what’s good about that sarcastic whiny boy? I need to send Joongki to have his eyes checked,” she grumbles as she continues to finish up the food he made for her. Being angry depletes her energy and she ought to replenish them through eating.

[jihyoxmi-blog]

➤ flayed into shape

[jihyoxmi-blog]

onewxmi:

Jinki stared at the food. The noodles looked deliciously chewy, the black bean sauce shined nicely underneath the bright spotlight above the table and he could almost taste the sweet and sour pork as the smell entered his nostrils. He wished he could dig right into, but found it extremely suspicious to be served this extraordinary dish after many servings of plain rice.

The female kidnapper was correct, however. If she truly wanted to drug him or was planning anything, she’d better keep up the routine and mix any suspicious substance with the rice or the water that he had been served the first days of the kidnapping. He’d eat it without question nor suspicion.

“So you’re just being kind while keeping me locked up in this room,” Jinki asked, trying hard to hide the sassy, sarcastic undertone that still lingered in his voice.

The female was clearly as (if not more) impatient as her male partner. Not only did she verbally express it, the way she crossed her  arms in front of her chest and tapped her fingers on her forearm also showed that she was clearly irritated that Jinki refused to believe her and wouldn’t touch the food she had ordered for him.

After a minute of silent consideration, Jinki picked up the chopsticks and stirred the noodles so the sauce was mixed properly. He still did not believe the woman had no ulterior motive, but he decided he did not want to let the opportunity to have a more tasteful and nutritious meal go to waste. Even if the food was a way to bribe him, he could still decide what he’d tell her even after he’d finished eating. It was not like she could force him to throw it all up if he refused to share the information she and her partner needed.

“If your true motive behind this gesture is to get information from me,” Jinki wondered out loud. “These might help,” he continued as he took the first bite.

The noodles melted in his mouth and the black bean sauce activated every taste bud in his mouth. For a second, he closed his eyes and forgot about the situation he was in, forgot about the prison that was this room and the real identity of this person in front of him.

“Saying that I’m being kind is an overstatement. I merely bought the noodles, just don’t expect it every meal.” she remarks, ignoring the underlying sarcastic tone of his. “At least you’re locked in a decent room with a bed, and not some dark, awful room and having to endure being tortured once in a while.” What more could a hostage like him ask for? Any better they would have to book a hotel room for him to stay already. He isn’t on some kind of vacation for sake.

She watches silently as he finally picked his chopsticks and began eating the noodles, in slight amusement at how he ate as though it’s the most delicious food ever. The plain rice Jongkook gave probably had him craving for food than weren’t bland. She didn’t blame him. She would too she had to ensure such tasteless food. Then again it beat having nothing but only water to sustain.

“Thanks for the tip,” she responded with no emotion, not at all believing his words. He has no information worth it to get out from, and furthermore she wasn’t here for the purpose he was being held captive for, but for Joongki. The person to blame and responsible for this whole thing is his father, he’s just unfortunate to have such a father. As did her. A father she would rather cut off all ties with than to be linked with.

“Finish up your food and we’ll talk.” It’s for his own good, really. In case his appetite gets too ruined or he gets too agitated to finish the noodles. She isn’t sure how much Joongki is worth in his heart and how far he’s willing to sacrifice for him.

[jongkook-mi-blog]

[[ these inconvenient fireworks ]]

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkookmi:

He was oddly grateful she had her face buried against his chest, so at least she didn’t see the sudden, vivid flash of emotion behind his eyes at her words. Had he scared her so badly she wanted to stay here, with him, the man who took everything? Had he truly ruined her that badly?

(He remembers HyeEun crying in his arms, all the stories she told of her father, and he thinks maybe that’s the thing about destruction, how it’s contagious, how it settles in your skin until all you touch is ruined, until all you touch ruins. Maybe that is the tragedy of it all, all these broken hearts just breaking more.)

For a breathless eternity, he froze, holding her close to him, finding no courage to do anyhing else, no courage to give her an answer until he feels her relax, listens to her breathing even out.

“You should be free of me,” he confesses to the dark, “but you can always come find me.”

He slowly, carefully lowers her to the bed again, pulling the blanket over her gently. He brushes her hair out of her face, for a moment lingering before he pulls his hand away. She should go, she should be free of him. He is not someone who should be around other people, he doesn’t have the heart for it anymore. She should go and find her own path, far from the destruction he caused, far from the burning wreck of his heart.

But, ultimately, she should have a choice. When she was better, he would give her that.

“Goodnight,” he whispered, “I won’t be far.”

He pressed a soothing kiss to her forehead and got up again, softly closing the door behind him.

Her eyes fluttered open in the dark once certain she’s alone in her room. She held one hand over her wild thumping heart, the other over her forehead, a vivid array of expressions changing on her face, confused over his gestures and the signal he gave her. One moment he’s so brutally cold to her and then the next he’s treating her so preciously. Does he want her gone from his life or is it all just a pretense? But she’s too worn out to comprehend now. Perhaps the next few days when she doesn’t feel so weak, as she slowly drifted off to sleep again this time knowing he’s not far from her.

-

The morning sun rays filtered into the room and she woke up with yawn, not because of any other reasons but because she was hungry. The feeling of empty, growling stomach had prevented her from sleeping in. She got down from the bed and stretched her limbs. Days of being bedridden had left her rather feeble and she probably ought to get back to her routine soon. Being stuck in the bed with only soup or porridge that weren’t hard to digest was such a bummer.

Making her way to the kitchen, she found herself standing there silently while watching him busy over breakfast, though she wasn’t sure what he was making. Despite the awkward monologue she was having with her inner self, the edge of her lips couldn’t help but curve upwards. There was something serene about the sight before her, making each day worth waking up to if that’s what her future would entail.

[jihyoxmi-blog]

➤ beneath an orange sky

[jihyoxmi-blog]

mixjoongki:

It took everything Joongki had not to break down and sob when Jihyo wrapped her arms around him. He hid his face against her instead and just cried, like the last seven years without her all had to be released at once. Her hand on his back, trying to soothe him, reminded him of their childhood, of the days before he realized just how much pressure she was under, before he realized he needed to grow up and take care of himself so he wouldn’t end up another burden for her to shoulder.

After a while, he got himself back under control—enough to stop crying, at least. He straightened up and she let go of him only to ruffle his hair like she hadn’t been gone for years. Her words were as playful as her actions, and it was discomforting how normal it felt. Like she slotted back as neatly into his life as she had been removed from it. Joongki tried to smile, tried to think of something clever to say, but his next thought wiped that all away.

“Jihyo, I—” His throat worked, and he took one of her hands, his fingers curling around hers loosely. (Her hand felt like her, but also—different, somehow. Stronger.) Joongki didn’t know where she had been or what she knew about what had gone on in her father’s household, but he would hate himself if she didn’t know and he couldn’t find the courage to tell her. “Jihyo, your mother—I’m so sorry. Your mother died. Not long after you did.” He grimaced at his wording choice. “After you—disappeared.”

Because…that’s what happened, isn’t it? If she didn’t die, then she…disappeared. Somehow. What had happened to her?

Your mother died.

She stiffens, slightly taken aback by Joongki’s decision to break this news to her right at this moment. She wonders if he could feel her tensing up at the mention of her mother, but it is obvious the smile on her face is gone.

She doesn’t answer him immediately but takes the time to calm herself so the intense feeling of hatred doesn’t show up on her face. She doesn’t want to scare off Joongki, nor have him feel that she is no longer the Jihyo he once knew, although it is a fact she isn’t and there is no way to return back to the person she once was. Beside she didn’t want to go back being that Jihyo who only knew how to endure everything silently by herself. She had enough of that.

“I know.” She finally says, and the tone of her voice is probably coming off a bit too distanced and cold than she intended to be. “I was there the day she was cremated.” Where she could only watch from a far distance and engulfed by overwhelming grief. As though her whole life was nothing but a joke. And where ironically her emotion support came from the person who had kidnapped her.

“I know everything you know, and even things you don’t. But first let’s order something, shall we?” She gives him a small smile, probably quite a poor attempt to dismiss him from asking too much. The topic is too heavy and she isn’t certain how much he is able to take in without breaking. “I kinda miss the food from here,” she remarks wistfully glancing over the menu after passing one over to Joongki.

[jongkook-mi-blog]

.so we escaped the weight of darkness

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkook-mi:

sand if you’ll be my star, i’ll be your sky you can hide underneath me and come out at night when i turn jet black and you show off your light i live to let you shine || @jihyoxmi

Most kidnapping cases of his were, despite all the preperation for the opposite scenario, ultimately very short affairs. He took the person, brought them to a nondescript place, called their parents, waited a few days for the money and returned the kid and never looked back. Or he took important people to avoid having them be in the place where they needed to be for an assassin to get their shot, wait for an all clear and set them on their way. All in all, jobs rarely took him longer than a week.

As soon as Ji Sukjin’s name had been dropped, he knew this particular case would not be like that. Time had faded his memories of the man, until nothing much but a bitter, cold hatred survived, until he only remembered those eyes full of contempt and disdain as he arrested him, how all his attempted explanations just caused those eyes to grow colder until eventually, shame had overtaken Jongkook and he’d stopped trying to explain at all.

He remembered that, a man like a rock, unwavering and unbreakable, even when he was wrong, even when all he stood for was wrong. This is his son, they said, he’ll cave for his son. Jongkook isn’t so sure. He doesn’t think a man like that caves for anything. (He thinks there are people in the world who didn’t give everything they had for someone as wonderful as Jihyo, so how does this kid measure up to that?)

Even so, the way he sees it, he wins either way. Either Sukjin breaks and Salvatore wins, or he gets to put a bullet between the eyes of Sukjin’s son and get rid of at least something related to the man. And if Sukjin doesn’t resign over this and the kid ends up dead, there is always the media to smear his name until he gets fired for dragging down the already abysmal reputation of the SPD. (He thinks he likes that option even better. Let Sukjin try to explain his worth to people with cold eyes filled with only with disdain, let Sukjin feel that hopeless silence gnaw its way into his bones.)

The only downside of the assignment was that it took him away from home and for her own safety, he couldn’t contact Jihyo much. Not that she cared much or let it stop her, and maybe he should’ve pretended to be surprised when she showed up at the door, but mostly he’d just been amused. What had surprised him was Jihyo requesting to talk to the kid. He’d allowed her, of course, given that she took all the necessary precautions so he couldn’t name her. He’d always give her anything she wants.

So he is currently in the kitchen, cooking up some healthy snacks for Jihyo when she’s done (it’s been days since he last saw her, lords know she took the time to eat every single piece of chemical filled garbage junk food this earth had to offer.)

Things like being kind and sympathetic aren’t traits that can be associated with her anymore, and she doesn’t peg herself as one either. If she likes something, she likes it, and if she hates something, she will make it disappear from her sight forever. Compromising for the sake of others even though she loathes it isn’t something she would do, unless it involves Jongkook but she knows he would never force her to do something she doesn’t like. 

Yet she is in a slight conflict, only because this time it’s somehow related to Joongki, and no matter how much blood her hands had drew and how many life she had claimed, she is unable to close her heart entirely to this younger brother of hers. Part of her feels guilty he has to suffer and go through what she did, as well as the loss of a close one. Ideally, she hoped he would meet someone who would cherish him as much as Jongkook cherish her, but what were the chances of that someone being the son of the SPD’s Deputy Chief, no less.

That makes thing so complicated and she isn’t entirely sure what to do. She doesn’t care what the darn happens to that commanding officer or his son, but she cares that it would indirectly affects both Jongkook and Joongki. Why did her younger brother had to find someone related to the SPD out of so many people, and it’s just going to end up a mess considering their father’s underhanded methods to get things work his way. 

Shutting the door and making sure it’s properly locked, she sneaks off to the kitchen where she finds Jongkook making food and instantly a smile finds its way to her without much effort. His presence never fails to lift her spirit up, and there’s always this sense of security she seeks so much whenever he is around. She gives him a quick kiss before stealing the food off from him. 

“Are all these food for me?” She asks cheerily, even though she is already biting into them and savouring the taste.

[jongkook-mi-blog]

[[ these inconvenient fireworks ]]

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jongkook-mi:

He holds the bowl in his hands a little helplessly as she turns around and says she’s not strong enough, feeling lost to reply. She was stronger than anyone he ever met and he loathed that she couldn’t see it. That maybe she couldn’t see it because of the life he forced her into. When it became clear she was done talking and eating, he silently gathered everything from the table, letting her sleep.

Her words still whirled in his head. I’m not strong enough. Not strong enough for what? Those simple, soft words wouldn’t leave him alone. (How often had he thought the same thing? How often had he cleaned up the blood and thought I’m not strong enough and endured anyway. How often had he wished for someone to see it, to tell him it was all right. Sometimes you’re not strong enough because what they’re asking of you is simply too much – sometimes weakness is the only sign of sanity you feel.)

He found himself preparing another soup for her so next time she could have more choice, trying to distract himself from the uneasy feeling restless in his bones. (He knows, better than most, that it’s the choices of others that really dictate your life, that you have no control over it, no say in it, and he keeps thinking of Jihyo dragging her suitcase down the hall, Jihyo saying I’m not strong enough.)

He hears her restless muttering and enters the room again to make sure she didn’t accidentally pull out her IV in her sleep, carefully sitting down on the edge of her bed. He frowned slightly when he started to be able to make out words, freezing when he realized what they were.

Was she dreaming of her family, hoping they’d still come for her? Was she dreaming of being free of him?

(And why, of all things, did that freeze the blood in his bones, did it tear at the sutures of his heart? What else would a girl taken from her life dream of?)

He should leave. He should leave and tell her she could go back if that is what she wanted. If she told on him, then so be it. His life had long since been lost, but there was something inside him screaming he could never have Jihyo lose it the same way. He didn’t want to take it from her.

But then she shot up, and suddenly she was in his arms, clinging to him, saying oppa, and he didn’t know what to do with any of it. He just held her, as in reflex, as in deep-rooted instinct, holding her carefully, gently against his chest.

“It’s all right,” he said softly. “I won’t let anyone hurt you.” The words leave his lips and he feels them with a sudden fierceness in his bones, in his heart. He would never let this world hurt her like it had hurt him.

At this moment she doesn’t register the fact that she is in her room, away and safe from the manipulation of her father, from the judging look of society, safe from the repulsive stares of those men, away from those pain and torment inflicted on her. The nightmares seem so convincing to the point that it felt real and she couldn’t breathe properly from the distress.

The only thing she could recognize and go through her head is the man in front of her, that somewhere deep down in her heart he would never hurt her, that he would protect her from any danger coming her way. So when he held her against his chest, she clings onto him tighter, as though scared he would pry her off and leave her to fend for herself.

“Oppa don’t send me away… I’ll become stronger, don’t leave me alone again…” she mumbles without thinking much, sniffing and finding his presence oddly comforting for her. There is a certain aura radiating off from him that makes her feel at ease. It isn’t until much later that she realises this is reality, and she is very much physically holding onto him just like how the koala would cling onto the tree.

She stiffens, not sure what to do with this newly gained info. He has yet to throw her off though, so perhaps he doesn’t mind it as much?

Eventually she relaxes and pretends to fall asleep while still in his arms, not wanting to face him and make it awkward. Mainly she just doesn’t want to deal with the brutal truth and leave from her comfy spot against him.

[jihyoxmi-blog]

➤darker than the night

[jihyoxmi-blog]

jinxmi:

“You already made me empty my pockets. You saw I had no weapons, or even anything that would enable…serial killing. Do I look like the type who would be able to go around killing multiple people and covering it up with my bare hands? Please. I do not have the hand-eye coordination for that.” Violence has never been his forte. No, if Seokjin wants somebody dead he gets someone to do the dirty work for him. “I was walking home, for your information. I didn’t realize it was so criminal to walk outside at night these days.”

“Vigilante justice is motivated by morals, contract killing is motivated by money. They might mingle, but can they be completely united?” Jin shrugs. “So, was it cash or conscience that made this guy kick the bucket?” His grin grows wider across his face. “Of course not. Pretty is a compliment, or at least, I’m taking it as one. Thanks, noona.”  

Jin gives a mock salute, hefting up the body bag and dragging it towards the warehouse. He feels paranoid with his back turned to her; she doesn’t seem like a rotten character, but their current standing isn’t exactly casual. Whose to say she won’t shoot him in the back, or drive away and call the cops? Or maybe she has a partner waiting in this warehouse for him. 

He doesn’t have much of a choice, anyway. The body bag isn’t that hefty but his nose curls in disgust at the thing that he knows lies within. Once inside the warehouse, he dumps it unceremoniously. “Do I just leave it here, or…?”

“Hush hush, I was just kidding. You’re no serial killer, I get that,” she clicks her tongue in defeat and slight annoyance. She was merely messing with him and in return she got back his long winded explanation. He speaks too much and her ears are ringing from it. Of course it isn’t criminal to walk outside at night, but ordinary citizens would go out of their way not to stay too late out in the street for obvious reason. Nights in Seoul aren’t for the faint-hearted.

“Cash for this guy,” she answers frankly. “A hefty sum for his death. Must have offended a lot of people.” Not that she cares. She gets her money and at the same time helps the world get rid of a jerk. Killing two birds with one stone. It is a job very worth her time and effort.

“Of course you’re taking it as a compliment. Now go do as I say, pretty boy,” she shoos, and despite how carefree she seems, her eyes are trained on him and the surrounding as she takes extra caution to walk behind him on purpose. As much as she is now certain the young lad isn’t going to be of any danger to her, she still doesn’t let her guard down. She never does, especially around people she wouldn’t trust her back to.

She doesn’t answer him, for a man emerges from the dark so quietly and out of nowhere as though like a shadow, clad in black outfit and a mask over his face just like them. And wordlessly he opens the body bag as if to check for the identity of the corpse, before passing a yellow envelope to her. She doesn’t react much to the man’s appearance and actions, and instead nonchalantly takes possession of the envelope handed over to her.

She looks over to young lad, gesturing with her head for him to follow her, and if he is smart enough he would best shut his mouth and reserve any questions he has until they’re out of the warehouse.