||| Giuseppina |||

| 20 | pansexual | snap me @ jizzapima |

[izyurfimenipaflanyant]

procrastinators are able to do 30 minutes of work in 8 hours and 8 hours of work in the 30 minutes before it’s due

[mrspider-deactivated20221213]

vampire stake to the heart wont work if your tits are big enough

[mochibat]

Yeah, you just catch it

[kool-aidpipelining01]

Nah nah nah, deflects it. Stake? Just bounces right off. Done. Back to doing hot girl shit.

[miss-nerdy-mess-deactivated2023]

Then I just use a spear instead.

[mrspider-deactivated20221213]

you are trying so hard to kill a vampire with big bazongas and for what. why would you do that to the ecosystem

[toastbutteregg]

COOKING MAMA

[rosecolouredheart]

Maybe my life wouldn't be better if I had magic powers but I'd at least have different, sexier problems.

[mentallyrecovering]

Stolen from Facebook but I love this

[bouncyirwin]

im in tears 😂😂😂😂😂

[peachtimes-deactivated20160831]

[thecryptkeeper]

once a girl reported me to an administrator at school bc i was breaking dresscode and she didnt like me. so i pushed her down the stairs. i just kept walking and i dont think she saw me and i never got caught. i know she got very seriously injured and they had to call an ambulance and she transferred schools bc she knew SOMEONE pushed her and she didnt feel safe. ive never regretted it. its been years since i graduated and im on mood stabilizers now, but sometimes when someone is testing my patience i calm myself down by thinking about how good it felt to snap once and how i cant do that again bc i would go to prison probably

[sadiepickles]

The biggest scam your brain is telling you is that everybody else is human and allowed to make mistakes but that you yourself have to be perfect and flawless to deserve their company

[bulbasaur-propaganda]

This is so cute!

And she made a good decision!

[jackisreallycool]

I’m a creep LMFAOOO I’m a weirdo LOL

[jackisreallycool]

I’m a creep LMFAOOO I’m a weirdo LOL

[memewhore]

[youknowyouarerussianwhen]

[winawinadajcie]

“Russia is so big the geese went for a walk in 1991 and only got back in 2014.”

“The geese built Dubai and returned.”

[themikeymonster]

IM IN TEARS I clocked in and found out our computers reset for *DRUMROLL PLS*

Y2k happened!!!! It's just twenty years late!!!!!

We can't run any reports rn 😂😂😂 amazing~

[taraljc]

ok that's awesome

[koobaxion-deactivated20220403]

[averyterrible]

where’s that comic where the guy takes the book on how to make a million dollars over a million dollars, and the book just says “shoulda taken the million bucks”

[femmedionysus]

right here! someone commented it in response to that original tweet, appropriately.

[tiredbtw]

*spends all of my time alone* perfect! but why am i crazy

[itzbatz-deactivated20240722]

can you imagine if coronavirus happened in like 2013. this site would be like "ALRIGHT LISTEN UP MOTHERFUCKERS TODAY YOU ARE GOING TO DO A LEARN ABOUT ~SOCIAL DISTANCING~"

[kiddthemaniac]

LUCKILY FOR *YOU* HANDSOME BASTARDS, OUR LORD AND SAVIOR BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH IS E X A C T L Y SIX FEET TALL.

SO NEXT TIME YOU’RE CHILLING WITH YOUR MOIRAILS, IMAGINE A BEAUTIFUL BENDYPOO LYING ARSE NEKKID ON THE FLOOR BETWEEN YOU. CAN’T FIT A WHOLE SHERLOCK?

THEN YOU’RE T O O  F U C K I N G C L O S E GOD DAMN IT. 

[neon-nobody]

[dieselcrab-deactivated20241213]