THE FAMILY NARRATIVE BY MELISSA, FRANKIE & JOHN
TOLD IN EMAILS AND LETTERS DURING 2019 & 2020
This is the font and color used for John’s emails and comments.
This is the font and color used for Melissa’s emails.
This is the font and color used for Frankie’s letters.
THIS IS THE FONT AND COLOR FOR OTHER ENTRIES.
The social content in all correspondence has been deleted for the most part, leaving only the family narrative information. The principal people in this essay are Melissa Mohon Papineau, Frankie Lou Weisinger Means, John McLeod, Ruth Gunter Johnston (Big), Charles Bennet Johnston (CB), Mary Frances Johnston McLeod Weisinger (Mary), Vivian Jane Johnston Jackson Mohon (Vivian), T.J. Johnston (TJ), R. E. Mohon (RE), Frank McLeod, Frank Weisinger. Mary, TJ and Vivian are Big and CB’s children. Melissa is Vivian’s daughter, Frankie and John are Mary’s children.
ON 2 MARCH 2019 JOHN WROTE THIS:
I recently had a remark by Frankie in one of her letters that Hampton was just drying up as a town. Not many businesses, that sort of decay. I replied that I think we have to expect that of our small towns - just becoming more or less residential communities. With good roads, good cars, cheap gas it is no big deal to drive to a nearby larger town for more choice and cheaper prices. Knowing what we can see with Google Maps, I decided to "drive" around Hampton and see for myself. Oh, my. She is certainly correct. I looked around a lot. Mary and Frank's little house on Highway 167 is gone. So is the Stringfellow house. In fact in that area, I didn't see any residences close to the highway. Then in Hampton I found very few places of business. Mary's old flower shop is gone. The movie theater is gone - probably long gone. The hardware - general store is gone, again probably long gone. I captured a few photos and sent them to Frankie telling her what I recognized as missing. Then I decided to "drive around Harrell" a bit. I was surprised that Big's house is still there. It is changed a bit - it now has a car port and the front porch is changed. The town people tribute Dr. C.B. and Ruth by naming the street that runs in front of their house as Johnston Avenue. Nice gesture. I captured a photo of the house and attach it to this email. I was responding to a facebook post by Annie (Melissa’s daughter) and posted a photo of the house to her, telling her this is where her grandmother, her grandmother's sister and grandmother's brother grew up and where her great grandmother and husband lived. The photo of the house in 2020 is on Page 23 of this narrative and the house in 1935 on Page 25. You know I lived in that house for my first seven or eight years and have very, very few memories of those times. That is a small house. Of course CB died shortly after I was born. I don't remember him at all. And Mary went to another area to have the child (me) and to finish high school. Then in that little house were Big, TJ, Vivian and me. And before me there was Big, CB, Mary, TJ and Vivian all in that little house. Well, it worked, obviously. Strange that I don't have hardly any memories of that time. It seems my memories mostly began after we relocated to Hope. I do recall my first day at school in Harrell. Big took me over to the school and put me in the class with my teacher. I didn't know anything and no one explained anything to me. So, we had some school. About midmorning, we had recess. We all went outside. I thought it was over. I went home and began playing in the yard. Someone from the school came over to tell Big that I was 'missing.' Well, Big gave me a whipping and sent me back to the school with the guy. Then the teacher gave me another whipping. Corporal punishment was the norm then. Of course I didn't think I did anything wrong. Someone should have explained the day's routine to me and they didn't. I suppose that's why I recall it. Another point I remember is when Big would not let me go to sleep until I knew the multiplication tables to 12. I vaguely recall a neighbor girl, pretty, who would come over and played with me. I don't recall any neighbor boys. I had neighbor boys to play with in Hope and I recall many of those times as good times. And around high school time there were girls, too.
My time in Hope is another story.
ON 5 MARCH MELISSA WROTE THIS:
Thanks for the family history. So Mary got pregnant in high school? Bet that was traumatic for everyone. Do you know anymore abt that? And while C.B. was ill.
Ruthann and I were speculating that Big’s brothers bought the house for her in Hope? She did not sell her Harrell house for many years. What do you think?
Boy, Big was pretty rough on you. Yep, hate that idea of hit then talk.
Enjoyed the email. Thanks. If you can remember anymore I would love to hear it.
ON 8 MARCH JOHN WROTE THIS:
Yes, I can give you more information on your two questions. I say information, because my recollection of the house and of Mary's situation are both formulated by years of observation, speculation and conclusions. I never had the good sense to ask good, specific questions to Big or Mary. Too bad. Give me some time. More of my conclusions will come to mind when I concentrate on one specific thing. I'll try to respond next week. I do not think Big was rough on me. I look back on it as good parenting. Just a different era with different norms. We, as a society, learn and progress. My love for Big was true, deep, unconditional and forever. I could not have asked for better parenting.
ON 9 MARCH JOHN WROTE THIS:
I copy a part of your email of 5 March and will answer part of it.
Ruthann and I were speculating that Big’s brothers bought the house for her in Hope? She did not sell her Harrell house for many years. What do you think?
This subject has a lot of information associated with it and one answer will raise many more questions, but I will not hesitate to give you my conclusion. First recognize Big's situation at the time. Her husband was dead. She had no income. She was making ends meet by cooking meals and serving them in her home which was across the railroad tracks from the depot for the railroad workers. She had four kids to care for - me, Vivian, T.J. and Mary in another town in high school. I knew where it was once, but can't remember now. Maybe I will remember it later. It was depression times - 1931 and after. C.B. died on 22 November 1932. I was born 21 September 1931. Ruth was in dire circumstances. And was until I was 7 or 8 years old. Her brothers, who were originally farmers and grew up on a farm, were prospering in the sawmill business. It was not surprising that they wanted to help her. In fact it would have been surprising if they hadn't. They invited her to move to Hope. They offered T.J. a job in the sawmill at Hope. He became the saw filer, a prestigious and top technical job in the sawmill. I don't know how he learned the profession. They may have sent him to school, to another mill to learn, maybe had an expert come in and teach him. I don't know. But that's what he became. One of the few higher paying jobs in the mill. They must have waited for TJ to finish high school in about 1939 and I would be about 8 at that time. I know for a fact that the house was bought for Big and us and the money was repaid to the brothers. Anyway, Big could not have financed that house, no matter what it cost, because she had no job, no income, no savings probably. No NINJA loans in those days like we recently had that nearly brought down the world financial system. You had to prove to the bank that you could repay the loan. I don't know if the brothers as a whole group financed the house for her, or if Warren who lived next door, did it on his own. Probably all the brothers, but Warren accepted from Big the monthly payments for the house. Now where did the money for those monthly payments for the house come from? Big was renting apartments in the house for 7 or 8 dollars a week. Most of the time it was just two apartments - upstairs. For a short period she rented one downstairs. She had a small income from the house in Harrell, but that wasn't much. Later Vivian told me that the rent from that house barely covered the insurance and taxes. The rent was so cheap because Big did not want to sell and someone needed to live in the house to make the insurance reasonable and to maintain the house. The renter agreed to maintain the house, do necessary repairs, etc in leu of a reasonable rent. I do recall that Big did pay for putting a new roof on the house, but other than that the renters handled it all. So what was Big's income? $30 a week? $120 a month? The household was Big, Vivian, TJ and me.
So, I conclude that most of the resources for maintaining the household and for paying off the house to the brothers came from TJ's salary at the mill. So, with fact and observation I conclude the following: The brothers financed the house, TJ paid for it, the title was in Big's name. A photo of the Hope house is on Page 24 of this narrative.
The second question: "Big did not sell her house (in Harrell) for many years. What do you think?" Big never sold the house. When the house was sold I owned two thirds of the property in Harrell and Vivian owned one third. Vivian wanted to sell and I agreed. I had little emotional connection to the house. My contention was that anything has its greatest value when it is in the hands of people who value it. The people who had lived in that house for all those years, albeit at cheap rent, valued it and wanted to buy it. TJ agreed with us, although he didn't have any final say. Mary did not agree and argued strongly against selling. But Vivian and I were the owners, so we sold. This was a very contentious point between Vivian and Mary. I recall that after the sale had been completed, sale registered at the court house, etc. Vivian and I got a cool drink at a fast food place there in Harrell and sat on a bench in the shade nearby. Vivian began talking about Mary and suddenly she began to cry and just could not stop. Finally the emotion was overcome and we returned to Hope. I think the difficulty she had with Mary and the emotion of closing that chapter of her life just overwhelmed her.
So, you see, answers to questions often raise new questions? Am I right?
I'll get to the Mary in high school part of your email questions soon.
ON 11 MARCH JOHN WROTE THIS:
Another point, and an important point, has come to my mind regarding Big's situation after CB's death in 1932. There must have been life insurance on CB. Life insurance was a big thing in those days. Salesmen traveled door to door selling it. This would have most likely been Big's main resource (supplemented by her cooking for the railroad men) between CB's death in 1932 and the move to Hope and TJ's job at the mill.
ON 12 MARCH MELISSA WROTE THIS:
Very interesting information. Yes, Big was amazing to have survived and taken care of so many people. She spent most of her life alone without a spouse. That is sad for her. She really had determination. Also, she took care of her mother and Henry. Do you think that fit into the plan for moving to Hope? Also, was Warren the leader of the brothers? And, Aunt Irma (Warren’s wife) did not seem social with Big at all. What do you think? Mostly I remember her being mad for our playing under the magnolia tree in her front yard.
Wonder why mom was so insistent abt selling the Harrell house? Do you have any memory of why she was crying abt Mary? I know dad was upset with Mary because she did not visit much (once) when mom was very ill and dying.
I just remembered that I wrote Big a letter each week I was away at college. Thought that was what you were supposed to do. Guess following your lead.
Do you know anything abt CB’ s personality.?
Hope you do not mind talking about this. It is very interesting to me. Perhaps it helps me understand myself.
ON 13 MARCH JOHN WROTE THIS:
My dear Melissa, I'm so proud of you for expanding Big's world while you were at the U. Her world was so small and so very often so very difficult. That gesture, that compassion, that love is bigger than you can ever imagine. I know you don't need me to say anything - good deeds are their own reward - but, anyway, I'm so proud of you.
OK, let's continue the story. I still hold Mary's high school days in the thought process. You're right. The Henry situation had to have been part of the plan, part of the agreement to move to Hope. Wiley, the oldest, stayed with the farm and he probably agreed to take care of mom, Martha Frances, and Henry went to Big. I do not recall living in Hope without Henry in his rocking chair there beside the window reading the Hope Star newspaper. That is, of course, until he died and when he died it was suddenly. Probably a stroke or heart attack. There was no prolonged illness. My first recollection of Martha was of her in the bed. I never saw her out of that bed in the same room with Henry in the rocker. I don’t know what put her in the bed-ridden condition or how or why Big was given the responsibility of 24/7 nursing. I think her time there was measured in years, not weeks or months. I could be wrong, but I don't think so. Maybe Wiley and his wife didn't want the 24/7 nursing task and they gave it to Big. She should have been in the hospital or nursing home. Maybe there were no nursing homes then. Maybe there was no insurance and they didn't want to pay the hospital or nursing home expense. I don't know. Maybe she was in the hospital and diagnosed as terminal with only a few weeks to live. I just don't know. A real nurse came in once in a while to give a shot or check on something. Other than that it was all on Big. The bath, the toilet - it was all done in that bed. And Big slept in that same room with Martha. And Martha was a very, very difficult person. Big never complained, never lost her patience. Wow. What a task.
Warren was the second child - Wiley the first. He was much older than Alfred. So, he was the senior. I don't know about leader. Warren took the house payments. When there was help needed for Henry and later for Henry or Martha it was Alfred who came over. I never saw Warren in that house. You are absolutely correct about Irma and sociability. I never saw her in our house either. And I don't recall Big's ever going over to their house, either. For any reason or occasion. I do recall once Big met Warren in the yard between our two houses. I asked what that was about, and Big said she was making the house payment.
I don't think Vivian was insistent about selling the Harrell house. I think the people who were living/renting the place pressed the issue. I think they wanted to own their own home and it would be that one or some other one. Vivian didn't want the difficult task of finding another responsible renter. So, we sold them the house and the complete lot the house was on. We retained the rest of the Harrell property which was most of downtown Harrell. At that time we had an offer for the rest of the property and I wanted to sell it, too. However, it was just too much for Vivian to completely close the Harrell chapter and she would not agree to sell. Unfortunate, because after many years of paying the property tax, RE and I finally sold the property and did not even get enough to cover the property tax payments we had made.
Regarding Vivian and Mary: Mary was often quite contrary - in fact maybe she was contrary more often than not. She could find something bad to say about almost anyone or anything. I don't know what was said between the two of them, but Mary was very, very vocal about the selling of that house. We even offered to let her take over ownership and live in it, but she blew her top at the offer. TJ had given me ownership of his third of the property because he didn't want to have any more dealings with Vivian. Vivian, Mary and I had been paying the taxes on the property - each person paying for one year, another person the next year, etc. One year Mary announced that she was not going to pay taxes on the property any more. Neither Vivian nor I could convince Mary that someone had to pay the taxes or we could lose the property. Finally, Mary gave her one-third ownership to me. That's how I came to be a two-thirds owner in the property. When RE and I finally sold the Harrell land, Mary heard about it and demanded her one-third share in the sale. I told her that the price didn't even cover the tax payments we had made. She still insisted. So, I gave her a bill for the taxes she didn't pay and told her that when I received her check for the delinquent taxes, I would send her the one-third share of the sale. She wrote me a really nasty letter following that. I replied that if she had something positive to say, I would reply, but that I was not going to reply to any correspondence like that. I also asked Frankie to tell her that directly. I never heard from her again and never saw her again.
After I relocated to the US from living in Europe for many years, I would take a trip back to Arkansas every year including an open-ended stay with her in her little house on Highway 167. It would not take long before she would begin to say negative and derogatory things about people that we both knew and some I didn't know. She most often would start off with Allison, Frankie's husband. This would go on for several days, sometimes a week or so. Finally, she would get around to me. I would listen to what she had to say and the next day I would be on my way. I never encountered this attitude from Mary when I was a youngster spending summers with her, Frank and Frankie Lou. However, I did observe that Mary was antagonistic toward Big during this time and this continued until Big's death. She had very good friends in Betty Joe (Stringfellow) and Rodney, who lived in a little prefabricated house nearby. For many visits we enjoyed an evening or two with Betty Joe and Rodney chatting around the kitchen table. It was fun. Finally she gave Betty Joe her thoughts on Betty Joe directly rather than behind the back to me - that was the end of that friendship. Yes, Mary was difficult to deal with. I never encountered this attitude from Mary during the many years I spent summers with her, Frank and Frankie Lou.
There is more to it than that. There was a great animosity between Mary and Big. It was from Mary toward Big, not from Big to Mary. Mary once told me about a very horrible thing she said to Big when Big was in the Hampton nursing home. The next conversation I had with Big I very indirectly brought the conversation to the link Big had with Mary. Big would not entertain anything negative and said "She is my daughter. I love her."
Mary was quite intelligent and clever. How did she become like this? How and why did her relationship with her mother form? I think it all began back there in Harrell with Mary in high school and her getting pregnant with me. Well, I'm still thinking about all of that. Too bad that I didn't have sense enough to ask about all of that when Mary and I were sitting around the table in her little house on HWY 167.
Oh, my. So much of this stuff is so sad. Just thinking about it brings tears. I suppose that is one reason I have not thought all of this stuff out. It is difficult, but I think it is good to bring focus to those times and events.
Well, that's all for today.
ON 15 MARCH MELISSA WROTE THIS:
Well, thanks for the nice comments about my letter writing. Really you started it. Don’t think anyone had a comment about it. Think I grew up in a benign vacuum. Boy you were born into some difficult circumstances and no fault of your own. Really totally innocent.
Do we know whether Mary was difficult or contrary as a child or just due to these circumstances?
And, Martha. Was she just a difficult person? Or was this an old age phenomenon.
Interesting. Big really had to put up with difficult people. Wonder if C.B. was difficult? Just thinking.
Don’t forget telling the family stories helps the feelings go away and keeps them from getting locked in our bodies. So, I hope this helps in the long run.
ON 21 MARCH JOHN WROTE THIS:
CONTINUING OUR STORY. I'm still pondering Mary's high school situation. As you stated "this must have been traumatic for everyone." I think it was not only traumatic but was the basis for the Big - Mary relationship for the rest of their lives, probably with some impact on me that I don't realize. Unfortunately I don't really know anything about that. I am disappointed, even angry, with myself for not having sense enough to get both Big's and Mary's perspective on this very significant and important event in the life of the family. We will never know what happened. All the people who know this are gone. I think we will have to commit to paper all the bits and pieces of information that we know or think we know and that we think are relevant to this event. Then analyze this information together with your professional knowledge to identify the possible scenarios that could have happened. Then mull it all around for awhile and possible arrive at the scenario of what most likely happened. I have already begun the process of writing down the bits and pieces of information that I think might be relevant to this study. In the meantime, I will comment on some of the points and questions you have previously posed and that I have left open. Was Martha a difficult person? Or just old age phenomenon? I can only speculate on this. I do know that she was difficult in that bed while dependent on Big for everything. She may have been a very independent person and was just disgusted with the situation life had presented her rather than being thankful for the help in enduring that situation. She married James Henry Gunter in 1877 and he died in 1898. They had ten children, so she was pregnant for most of her married life. All the kids had two names except Ruth and Henry. Ruth was the third girl. There is a book in the bible called Ruth. Was Martha a religious person? I know that Big was, even devout. I tried to be religious, too. Even joined Big's church, Garrett Memorial. I don't recall if I was baptized or not. Probably was. In the end I had to admit to myself that I didn't believe it. I don't rule out the existence of God. I just think that I don't have enough information to understand it all. Certainly I don't believe any of it the way the Christians do. OK. Back to Martha. Maybe she wanted to die in her own bed in her own house in College Hill and maybe Wiley and Bennie who lived there then didn't want to take on the 24/7 job of caring for her. And she was moved to Big's house. We can only speculate.
You previously posed Was CB difficult? What was CB's personality? Big was teaching school at Henderson College, I think in Arkadelphia, when she married CB. (She sent me to Henderson after high school graduation. I was elected freshman college president. But, I dropped out after the first semester and joined the Air Force and went to Korea.) How did they meet? Was this an arranged marriage? Could have been. Not uncommon then. I don't think CB was a romantic person. I saw a picture of him. He was fat. Big stomach. That physique impressed me so much I didn't notice if he was handsome or not. I asked Big when we were in Hope if she had known romantic love. She answered quickly "no." This makes me sad. A life without romantic love. How awful. I think CB was set in his ways, confident in his own decisions, maybe arrogant in his own decisions. I don't think his practice in Harrell was very profitable. I recall Big’s commenting about payment with produce and animals. It was depression times. Some of his medical friends encouraged him to move his practice to El Dorado where they were doing well. El Dorado was an oil town. He refused. He sought work with the US Corps of Engineers. He applied to be their retained doctor and was accepted. This was with work on the locks and dams on the Ouachita River. Even with his apparently meager income he did raise three children and owned his home which was better than most at that time and owned most of the downtown property in Harrell.
OK. Until next time.
ON 29 MARCH MELISSA WROTE THIS:
I just finished reading a short biography of Frida Khalo.. I enjoyed reading about her life. Quite tragic. She was married to Diego Rivera, famous Mexican muralist and painter.
Now, C.B. looked like Diego. Not a good comparison. Very unusual to be fat like that during that time. C.B. had sisters in Harrell too. One was disabled, Boosie? I have some postcards that were sent to her. Do you have any memories of her? I also have a letter of recommendation from the Corp of engineers for C.B.
Agreed that the pregnancy was the core issue between Big and Mary. The anxiety and fear had to be super bad during that time because of C.B. being ill. Maybe this was Mary’s escape from the family, although ill advised.
Wonder why Big and Henry only got one name? Baby/child fatigue? I would be cranky too if I had that many children. Women in those times were machines plus had to work hard. Terrible. Yes, I wish we had someone to ask about all of this. Wish I had asked a long time ago. Maybe we can piece together some of it.
ON 3 APRIL JOHN WROTE THIS:
I have read about Frida and Diego. Quite a couple and story. I saw a mural by Rivera somewhere. I don't remember where - maybe San Francisco or New York. Could even have been in Mexico City. Just can't nail that memory down. I do recall how he worked communism into the mural that I saw. I looked on the Internet for a photo of him to refresh my memory. Diego was much fatter than CB. As I recall, CB was stout with a protruding stomach. I only know him from the photograph. Yes, unusual in those days. I suppose that's why it struck such a cord with me. Now that you mention it, I do recall Boosie. My only memory of her is that she was always in the wheel chair. Time was always spent with her, not me, of course. I was too young to know what was going on then. I don't recall her being in Harrell. I thought the Johnstons were in Warren and we went there to visit them sometimes - even after we moved to Hope. Of course my memory could be of our going from Hope to Harrell to visit the Johnstons living there with an occasional visit to other Johnston family members in Warren. Memory very shaky here. What is the address on the Boosie postcard? That should answer that ambiguity. A few years ago Jim Gunter asked me for any information I had about the family for his family tree effort. I gave him what I could collect and even made my own 'book-tree.' I think I sent you a copy. Anyway after I sent him what I knew and could collect, he asked me to try to get information about CB. I think through some of Frankie Lou's kids, I gained a Johnston address in Warren. I wrote several letters but could not obtain any information from the person I was corresponding with and finally gave up. After that I received a letter from Frankie telling me that Jim had come to the area looking for information on CB. As far as I know he never collected anything either. I'll hold on to my 'information' and speculation regarding Mary for awhile longer. I have written to Frankie Lou to see if she remembers anything. This Mary-John-Big saga could take some time. I have to ponder it. I never thought about it with the intensity we are giving it now.
ON 3 MAY JOHN WROTE THIS:
Well, back to the family narrative, sort of. I'm still waiting on a reply from Frankie Lou. I hope I have not injured an old nerve or opened an old wound thought to have been closed and healed. In the meantime, perhaps you could comment on a couple of things about Mary. We do have RE's comments about Mary's non-visits during Vivian's terminal time. You went on a trip to Spain with Mary, didn't you? Do you have any memories of that trip that might address her character? I think Vivian told me about something strange with Mary regarding your marriage to Bill. As I recall Vivian said that she and Mary traveled together to the wedding site and after getting there and helping to get everything prepared, Mary refused to attend the wedding. Do you recall anything about that? What about the address on the Boosie postcard? If it is Harrell, that would help to explain why CB continued his practice in Harrell rather than moving to El Dorado where he could have had a larger and more profitable practice in the oil town.
ON 8 MAY MELISSA WROTE THIS:
No specific recall on the trip to Spain. That is true she did not come to the wedding ceremony. She stayed in the motel room. I have nice memories of that day, so it did not affect me. I think she was upset over Bill‘s old friends being rowdy the night before. At least that is what I think. I wonder if mom was mad at her over this. This would have been disappointing to her mostly. Wonder if that is why she did not visit? They may have had words. As I recall aunt Mary complained about what I cooked one evening. Think she was a very negative person and ready to take offense at anything. She was probably more cooperative and likable with other people, i.e. not family. Suspect she had at the very least major depression recurring. Do u know anything abt circumstances with your father and her marriage to Frank? Found those postcards addressed to Versa, Ruth-Boosie, Wid. Boosie was in a sanatorium 1910 or so near Little Rock. Cards addressed to Harrell, Summerville, Little Rock. Take a look. Will be in next email. Were these people all siblings? Still does not answer question of why they stayed in Harrell. This is all so interesting-like a mystery.
ON 13 MAY JOHN WROTE THIS:
I have received the letter from Frankie that I was waiting on and it was a stunner. Apparently just resurrecting memories of these old times stunned Frankie, too. Maybe somewhat traumatized her. This really uncovered a side of Mary that I could never have imagined, and didn’t. Yes, I was stunned. Absolutely shocked. Here is what Frankie wrote:
During the time when I was from about 12 to 16 years old mama and daddy worked the farm all the year except the winter. During the winter daddy worked in construction and mama worked in town. Daddy would be gone all week and returned home for the weekends. I remember a man named Henderson who would come to the house and pick up mama and me and we would go to El Dorado. They would put me in a double feature movie and would return in about 4 hours. He was not from Hampton. Later on she became less secretive about seeing other men. When mama was working at the Drug Store she began to see Gerald Cook. I would wait in the truck while they would go into the bushes south of town. I remember one time we went to a dance in Harrell and mama got drunk. This was the only time that happened. It got really bad when she was working at Clanton’s Café. She would stay out all night somewhere leaving me at home alone. She was gone a lot. When daddy did not come home on the weekend, she did as she pleased and would be gone. One time there was a big snowfall and you couldn’t travel on the roads. Mama did not come home for four days. Thankfully there was butane for heating, but by the end of the four days the food was almost gone. This was scary.
All this came to a point one weekend. One time daddy said that he would not be coming home on the next weekend. Mama told me she had to go to Hope to see about Big who was very sick. But daddy did come home and wanted to know where mama was. I told him what mama had told me. He had me call Hope to find out. They said that Big was OK and they had not seen mama. Daddy beat me really bad thinking that I was lying to cover up for mama. My friend Mary Lou Means called me and I told her about the beating. She had her brother, Allison, come and get me. I stayed with Mary Lou then. The police came to investigate, but I didn’t press charges. Mama did not try to see me or to get in touch with me. Allison asked me to marry him and we married in 1951. We moved to Warren where he was employed as a surveyor. We had a good marriage and he provided well for us. Mama or daddy didn’t contact me. I don’t know why mama thought she was so much above the Means but she did. By then we had a baby girl who was Alice Ann. This was in May of 1952. Finally I went to see them and we got along for awhile. Then daddy got sick and he lived for about a year. During the time he was sick and especially near the end, I helped as much as I could. Mama was so hateful and bitter and after daddy died she told me she hated me. I asked her why and she said she didn’t know why, that she just did. I just let it go and still went to see her and drive her places. She told some terrible lies to people that I learned about after she had passed away. She never had good things to say about me or my children. Daddy never said a word to me about what he did to me. And to this day I still have a dream about it. I thought he told mama he beat me but she said he did not. I’ve never got over it. I am sorry to say that I do not look back with love for my parents. It has been a hard thing to live with. It seems I was not wanted and you were not either.
Now back to comments by John: This news from Frankie is certainly a shocker – absolutely astounding, stunning. Of course this was not going on during the farm planting, growing, harvesting season and when I was there during the summer holidays. It was only during the winter. Deep in my memory are two instances that could hint to this promiscuous behavior that I observed in my summer visits. One time I looked in the magazine rack that was in the living room of the little house on the highway. I was shocked and astounded to find several magazines with naked people in social situations. I was so stunned that I quickly put them back in the rack and never said anything about it. Thinking about it now, I suppose the magazines must have showed scenes in a nudist colony. Another time on one of my summer visits as a youngster, we had just retired for bed and sleeping. Mary said in a voice loud enough for everyone in or near the little house to hear “Oh, Frank!! Your hand is so cold.”
I’ll write some comments about these absolutely shocking and stunning revelations. Frankie was married at 16. She was born on 24 Feb 1935. She was married on 3 June 1951. Alice Ann was born on 2 May 1952, 11 months after they were married. The indiscretion by Mary is a real shocker to me. I never imagined such a thing was going on. And I am really surprised, shocked and disappointed that Frank abused Frankie. I recall four instances when I was visiting in the summer where I made a huge careless error and he just laughed it off – I carelessly contaminated a large bin of picked cotton, I nearly wrecked the tractor, I started a forest fire and I flooded a part of a cotton field. So my experience with Frank was that he was a hard worker but a gentle person. Maybe Frank was just discovering that Mary was unfaithful and that he was losing her. That sort of thing can drive a loving husband to irrational actions that are out of character and reason. His resort to violence even out of anger and despair is deplorable! And against his own child!! I had been spending every summer vacation from school with Frank, Mary and Frankie Lou. Late in my high school years I came to the farm and Frankie was not there. Mary tried to explain why Frankie was absent. She had a story about a skating rink in Hampton where kids gathered after school. Mary said that she told Frankie not to go there and not to mix with the older boys. She said Allison Means was one of the boys who frequented the place. From what we know now, Mary did not know of Frank’s abuse of Frankie causing Frankie to leave home. Mary just told me that Frankie ran away with Allison, a boy 10 years older that Frankie. (Mary ran away from home with a man who was 21 years older than she was.)
I recall that when I joined the military I was writing weekly to Mary and each time pleading with her to answer with her news. This went on for quite a while and finally I wrote that if I didn’t hear from her I would conclude that she did not want to correspond and that I would stop writing. So, she didn’t write and I stopped. She did not write me, but wrote the base commander and complained that I was not writing my mother and got me in a lot of trouble. So, sending the police over to Woodberry without going first herself is right in character for Mary.
Our thoughts and comments forming this Family Narrative got me to thinking about Mary. So I have begun another narrative centered on Mary. I’ll call it the Mary Story. I will incorporate part of the Mary Story here in the Family Narrative.
I WILL COPY THAT INFORMATION HERE:
Let me start this off by stating what I know for a fact. When I was born on 21 September 1931 Frank McLeod was 40 years old and Mary was 19. Frank listed his residence as Banks and Mary listed her residence as Harrell. The doctor who completed the birth certificate was Dr. J.E. Rhine of Thornton. The birth certificate was registered by Ruth Johnston on 24 September 1931. Frank’s trade was listed as ‘ginner.’ Mary’s trade was listed as ‘housekeeper.’ The birth was listed as ‘legitimate,’ which means they were married at the time of my birth.
During a summer visit to Mary and Frank Weisinger when I was in school I asked Mary if she knew where Frank McLeod was. She replied “you have waited too long for that. He is dead now.” I asked her how life was with Frank and she replied “wonderful.” I asked her where they lived. She said “in the hotel” or maybe she said “in hotels.” I’m not clear on that point. I asked Mary didn’t he want to contact me, to see the kind of person I am? Mary replied “no contact. That was part of the agreement. He never broke it.” I saw some pictures of Mary and me with Mary in her school graduation cap and gown. I was a toddler. I could walk. The top of my head was about up to her waist. I was maybe 2 or 3?
These pictures were taken at the Johnston home in Harrell, Arkansas in 1934 on the occasion of Mary’s Artesian High School graduation.
On 21 September 1931, Ruth Johnston was 45, CB Johnston was 56, Frank McLeod was 40, Mary was 19, TJ was 14, Vivian was 10, Frank Weisinger was 19. CB Johnston died on 22 November 1932. The Great Stock Market Crash occurred on 29 October 1929. The country was in the Great Depression with 30% of the work force unemployed until the beginning of WWII in 1941. Mary and Frank Weisinger had their first child on 24 February 1935.
So, on 21 September 1931, Ruth’s husband was dying, Mary was delivering John, TJ was 14 and Vivian was 10. The country was in the Great Depression with 30% of the work force unemployed. THE MARY STORY SEGMENT END.
In our correspondence Frankie describes Mary as hateful and bitter. I would agree and add mean to that list. I think Boosie in Harrell was a significant part of the decision for CB to maintain his practice in Harrell. Of course, if Harrell, on the RR with a passenger and freight depot, had grown it would have been a wise decision. Ruth and CB owned much of the land of downtown Harrell. Unfortunately, the town went in the other direction. The population was 254 at the 2010 census.
ON 28 MAY JOHN WROTE THIS:
Sunday was the big Memorial Day celebration and Monday was the official day of remembrance. As I recall it was called 'Decoration Day' by Big and the family in those days. We went to Shilo Cemetery at Lamartine, Arkansas, as I recall. It's where all the old Gunters are buried - her parents and all her brothers and sisters. At least I think that's the case. I don't recall much about it except that there was a huge outdoor table or tables put together with a colossal spread of food. I suppose it was an organized pot-luck spread. Lots and lots of wonderful food. I remember that. I think there was a church there at that time, but I am not
ON 3 JUNE MELISSA WROTE THIS:
Have questions about family information
What is a ginner?
Wow, that age difference 40 to Mary’s 19. Do we know anything abt that relationship? Don’t you think that is unusual? Any relatives on that side? How did Mary get herself in that relationship?
Could Frank have been abusive when he drank. Did he have an alcohol problem?
What do you think about Mary going out? Other men? I never knew any of that.
Mary turned on all these people at some point. Friends or family. You were not alone in this. She had to have a mental illness. Wish we knew more about childhood with big and C.B.
Was the Means family up standing in the community? Was she lowering herself?
There are so many missing pieces.
ON 4 JUNE JOHN WROTE THIS:
A ginner is a person who operates a cotton gin machine. Yes, 40 to 19. That is very significant. What is your situation speculation if it were 19 to 19? Entirely different, right? You ask if we know anything about that relationship. I only know this: (During a summer visit to Mary and Frank Weisinger when I was in school I asked Mary if she knew where Frank McLeod was. She replied “you have waited too long for that. He is dead now.” I asked her how life was with Frank and she replied “wonderful.”
I asked her where they lived. She said “in the hotel” or maybe she said “in hotels.” I’m not clear on that point. I asked Mary ‘didn’t he want to contact me, to see the kind of person I am?’ Mary replied “no contact. That was part of the agreement. He never broke it.”
I did try to find some McLeods in Banks, but never made any contact. So I know nothing from that side. You asked 'how did Mary get herself in that relationship?' We'll just have to speculate on that from the few facts that we do know. As I said, I'll write an essay about the situation based on the few facts that we do know and what Frankie and I can recall and which I will call The Mary Story.
For now, I will continue and comment on some of the points that have been raised. Frank as a violent person was certainly a surprise to me. I'm thinking that he just went completely out of control thinking that his wife was leaving him. Yes, he had a drinking problem, but he wasn't a violent drunk in my experience. He could not hold his whisky. He and Lewis (a black boy who worked on the farm) would go into town on Saturday with the week’s raw cotton, get money for it I suppose, Frank would get a few drinks, come home, and get sick from the alcohol. I saw him on several occasions laying on the front porch and leaning over the edge regurgitating. There was no alcohol kept in the house as far as I know, so he only drank on the Saturday that he carried the cotton to the cotton gin. That’s my experience.
Yes, Mary's having multiple boy friends is a shocker. I never knew it and never suspected it.
Yes, poor Mary could find something negative to say about everyone and everything. Surely she had some happy times, but she must have had a very unhappy side of her mentality to contend with also. Yes, I sorely wish we knew more. I am so disappointed in myself for not asking both Big and Mary about that situation.
Mary could have thought she was better than the Means family. She probably thought that about most people. She definitely did not like Allison. She never had anything nice to say about him and when I brought up positive attributes she dismissed them. I recall one time after the farm property had been divided including the Oscar barn. The barn, obviously in ownership contention, had a fence or dividing partition down the middle of the barn. It was abandoned for use and was rotting. Mary fell through the rotting upper floor onto the ground below and could not move. Allison found her and got her to the hospital. When I brought this to her attention she just said “I would have eventually gotten out,” refusing to credit Allison for helping her and possibly saving her life.
ON 5 JUNE JOHN WROTE THIS:
I laughed with a mental Oh My! Was this a normal reaction? Regardless, that was my reaction when I read the latest revelation from Frankie Lou. And my conclusion, now knowing Mary’s activity, and after reading Frankie’s latest letter is that the Harrell – Hampton area must have been a hot bed of promiscuous activity. I replied to Frankie’s previous letter and asked her some new questions. Some of my letter was as follows:
‘I have some questions concerning the situation during and after the time we were young and Mary and Frank were living in the little house on the highway. How is it that Mary and Frank ended up with the 80 acre farm and property that we had always lived in and half of the big barn at Mr. Oscar’s place? It seems that Mr. Oscar’s house and half his big barn and the property it was all on went to someone, and the rest went to Mary and Frank. Was it in the Oscar will? Or was Frank a relative of Mr. Oscar and the land and property went to Frank in that way? The division of the property must have been contentious because as I recall there was a line or fence down the center of Mr. Oscar’s barn meaning that half the barn went to Frank and half went to other family members. Do you know or recall anything about that?’
And here is part of Frankie’s reply to that letter.
You asked about Uncle Oscar. There is a story there. He had an affair with daddy’s mother and she got pregnant with daddy and then Uncle Tom. Her husband, Onnye Weisinger finally caught on and left her. So daddy and Uncle Tom were really Witheringtons instead of Weisingers. It was a well kept secret. I did not know it until after daddy passed away. More on this saga later.
I will include more about this when I know more about it.
Agree. Amazing. I had no clue about any of this. And Aunt Mary.
ON THE NEXT TIME JOHN WROTE:
I queried Frankie in my next correspondence to her about the name “Onnye.” She didn’t have any more information on the name. However, I found on the Internet that Onnye is a Norwegian man’s name used in days gone by, not popular now. So that should answer that. Frankie and I have some open questions. I’m waiting on her answers.
On 28 July Melissa wrote:
Brad has the old radio from Bigs. Remember in the sitting room. It is a Philco made in 1937. Brad looked it up. Cost $100. wonder when it was bought? Do you know when they moved to Hope? I am betting Uncle TJ bought it. Also, I thought that TJ wanted to be a doctor. Did he go to school/college for a semester? He certainly had his bitterness—maybe over that? You know I have no evidence for these thoughts, but grew up thinking about this. Wonder why he never married? We found letters from a girlfriend when mom cleaned out the house. So, he was not entirely faithful to Nell. Interesting don’t you think?
Yes, I remember that radio console well. I saw it several years ago in Brad's facebook post of his Christmas tree. It was observable in the tree photo and I commented on it. You verified that it was the Big radio. You open a lot of questions in that paragraph of your email. I'll have to think about all the points you raise. As I recall the TJ - Nell, Moxely - Big situation resulted in severe consequences. I'll have to think about all of that. Let the old grey cells find their way to long dormant memories.
I have a very subtle, intermittent problem with the computer that I use for the Internet and so far I have not been able to solve it. So let me touch base while it is functioning. My comments here are in relation to your email of 28 July. However, I will comment on TJ – Nell – Big after I have had more time to think about that. I was born in 1931. I most likely attended at least first grade in Harrell. I would be 7 entering 2nd grade. Therefore, it would seem that the earliest time for the move would be 31 + 7 = 38. I suspect the move waited on TJ to graduate from high school, not connected to my schooling. But it seems most logical to me that the move to Hope was in 1938 or 1939. If the radio was manufactured in 1937 it could still be a new item in the store in 1938 or 1939. And I would think that this was a luxury item, too. They had a car soon after the move also. As I recall it was a four door, black Chevrolet sedan. However, researching Chevies in that time frame, most of the black Chevies were 2 door, not many 4 doors were made. So, very likely my memory does not serve me well in this instance. Could be 2 or 4, most likely 2, but my memory says 4. As I recall it was a 1937. So in 1938 it could still be a new car. Or even new in early 1939. As I recall we moved at Christmas time, whatever year it was. A new Chevrolet sedan cost about $700 then. TJ's salary would be the major source of income for the family. In those early days there was a lot of work being done on the Hope house. New wall paper in most of the rooms and new cabinets in the kitchen. As I recall Mr. Minor, who was the store manager/bookkeeper for the mill was supervising all that work and that made me think that the work was being done with workers from the mill. Could be mistaken, of course. But that's what I thought at the time. Remember, I was just a kid though. Could be Mr. Minor supervising other workers. I don't recall hearing TJ talking about medical school. But he and I did not have a good rapport. Seldom did we engage in good conversation. I do not recall his going to college for a semester or his discussing college. Yes, he was troubled at the end. I don't know if it was bitterness or just the disagreement over something that happened around the time Big was declared incompetent. Whatever it was it was mostly between Vivian and TJ with Mary apparently aware but not vigorously involved. OK, I'll continue to think about TJ - Nell - Big and will get back to you on that when I recall something.
Here I am back on the Family Narrative Continued. I will start off by copying your comments from your last email.
Brad has the old radio from Bigs. Remember in the sitting room. It is a Philco made in 1937. Brad looked it up. Cost $100. Wonder when it was bought? Do you know when they moved to Hope? I am betting Uncle TJ bought it. Also, I thought that TJ wanted to be a doctor. Did he go to school/college for a semester? He certainly had his bitterness—maybe over that? You know I have no evidence for these thoughts, but grew up thinking about this. Wonder why he never married? We found letters from a girlfriend when mom cleaned out the house. So, he was not entirely faithful to Nell. Interesting don’t you think?
In my last comments, I said that I thought the move was in 1938 or 1939, definitely not in 1937. If we say 1938 that means I spent only one year in school in Harrell. Possible. If we say 1939, that would mean I went to first and second grade in Harrell. Now, after thinking more about the time of the move, it may not have been at Christmas; but it definitely was winter. I vaguely remember at our move into new and unfamiliar surroundings that we were around a fire place keeping warm and we were in the home of Warren Gunter. There were some fabulous toys around that Bill and WH Jr. were playing with. I have no other information regarding that.
Also maybe TJ did want to be a doctor. It would be logical for him to follow in his father's footsteps. Lots of children do that. It's just that I never heard him talk about it. But as I said, TJ and I did not have a good rapport. Maybe you heard Vivian say that he wanted to be a doctor. What do you think? I never heard anyone, Big or her kids, mention school/college for TJ for a semester or any post high school education for TJ. I had the feeling that he preceded us in the move from Harrell to Hope and immediately went to work in the sawmill.
Yes, I can verify that TJ was not faithful to Nell. He told me about a girl in Texarkana and although we did not discuss anything intimate, I am absolutely certain there was intimacy between the two of them. I never liked to discuss intimacy, other people's or my own. I always thought, and still do, that the intimacy between two individuals is very private and for the two individuals involved only. So, I never pressed the conversation on that subject, just listened to what he wanted to say.
I have some unpleasant thoughts regarding the relationship between TJ and Nell, and involving Big. One time TJ and Nell invited me to come along on one of their dates. As I recall we were going to Texarkana for some event. Nell drove in TJ's car and I was in the back seat. I do not recall anything about the event. It is very difficult to express my thoughts about this situation; therefore I will resort to a metaphor or analogy. Envision a very small dog eager for the master's attention and affection. Can you see the little dog at the feet of the master with his tail wagging, looking up at the master. The master looks away. The tail wagging does not stop, but slows significantly. The master's gaze moves in this direction, not down, but in this direction. The wagging increases significantly. The little dog pants slightly. The master looks down. The wagging intensifies into a blur. The master reaches down and touches the little dog's head. The little dog barks in joy and leaps off the floor.
Got the picture? That's what I saw from the back seat of the car. Quite frankly for a grown man to conduct himself in such a manner was absolutely disgusting to me. TJ invited me a couple of other times, but I declined each time and he never again invited me. Which makes me question the intimacy between TJ and Nell. If there was any, it was completely controlled by Nell. Was their association platonic? Probably not, but it would not surprise me if that was the case. Definitely TJ's sexual appetite was not satisfied by Nell, and TJ was not the promiscuous type. Certainly Big thought there was intimacy. And I am convinced that that was a big problem for her. We know that she was a devout Christian. Unmarried or marital infidelity sex is a sin. It is clearly written in the bible. The penalty, written in the bible, is death by stoning. One day Big spoke to me briefly about TJ and Nell, not with the words I'm using, but quite reserved, and only to express that she did not approve of the relationship the way it was or appeared to be. She ended the brief comments by saying "I don't see why they don't get married." I came to think that Big's intense dislike of this situation carried over to the entire Moxley family. Or maybe there was some other reason for her dislike of the Moxley family. I don't know. I just know that's the way it was. Vivian also told me that Big disliked the Moxleys. I hesitate to use the word hate, especially to use the word to describe an emotion in the mind of Big. However, I do think that it applies here.
As I recall TJ was working for Uncle Frank in Texas and a house was built for Nell and TJ there, but when it was time to "sign the contract" Nell said that she was not going to leave home (her family home near our house in Hope). I come to the memory of one of the Moxely family passing away, I think it was Mr. Moxley. There are two salient points here. One, Big is a devout Christian. Love thy neighbor as thy self. Have compassion for your fellow man. Turn the cheek. Do not judge others. Forgive those who sin against you. Renounce vengeance. Then there is Point Two: Big hates Nell and the Moxelys. She can't help it. What she sees with Nell and TJ and condoned by the Moxley family is abhorrent to her. Her Christian faith compels her to take flowers to the Moxely home. I can see her leave the house with the flowers, walking fast and determined, in the direction of the Moxely house which is not more than five minutes away.
I don't know the time line or have any way of establishing it, but I think that Big had her first stroke shortly after this event which was very, traumatic for her. Huge conflict. I feel her agony. I sense it.
OK, let's think a bit about TJ's bitterness.
I stopped to get something to drink and in the process found that I am tired. It's been a busy day for me today. Saturday, 17 August 2019 at about 9:30 PM. I'll try to get back on this tomorrow.
Sunday afternoon, 18 August 2019, another busy day, but I'll write a bit on this.
The only thing that I know for sure is that after Big's incompetence hearing there was a lot of animosity between TJ and Vivian. TJ definitely felt that he had been wronged by Vivian. The impression that I got from Vivian was that she thought that she had done nothing wrong. I also got the impression that Vivian had some fear that TJ might become violent in his anger. I never got the impression from TJ that he ever considered violence. Regrettably I never discussed the subject with either of them. I recall one day TJ said there was going to be a family meeting and he wanted me to come with him. At this point the court directed incompetence decision for Big was settled. Vivian named controller of the estate, Mary named controller of the person. There were five of us in the room, perhaps a judge's chambers or a lawyer's conference room - I don't know. There was me, TJ, Vivian, Mary and either a judge or a lawyer. Mary was quiet the whole time. I don't recall her saying anything during the entire meeting. TJ and Vivian were across the table from each other and immediately TJ began verbally attacking Vivian. Vivian responded aggressively, giving as good (or bad) as she got. The moderator (judge or lawyer) had some documents and some written points to decide. He and I began to discuss them (without input from TJ, Vivian or Mary) and to make a decision on the points in question. Finally the judge and I had discussed everything and had decided everything, all the while with TJ and Vivian exchanging negative comments and with quiet Mary sitting there. The three family members signed the documents and we departed. Outside TJ said to me "I guess you think I'm a terrible fellow." I said "no, I'm just disappointed that there is so much animosity between you and Vivian. You started it in there. Why?" TJ said "I thought it probably was my last opportunity to get at Vivian." Unfortunately I was concentrating on the business at hand which was all I could manage and did not pay much attention to the words between TJ and Vivian except to note that they were hostile.
Without really thinking it out, I had always thought that the disagreement between them was regarding Big's house. TJ had to have paid for the house, repaying the Gunter brothers. That was the only real family income. It was in Big's name. Apparently at the Big incompetence hearing, Big's ownership of the house was established as part of her estate. TJ was living in the house at the time. Big was in a Hope nursing home, apparently being paid for by TJ. So, inasmuch as Vivian was now by court order in charge of Big's estate, the finances, she would place the house on the market to pay Big's nursing home bills. So for TJ to continue to live in the house, he would have to buy it from Vivian, or from Big's estate, which he did. Thereby essentially paying for the house twice. Big's house was always home base for me. When I was in school in Hope growing up, when I was in the military, when I was going to college, when I was working in industry, when I retired. I always came home to Big's house. There was only one exception. I think it was after Vivian was gone and before Janie. RE invited me to stay with him in Emmet. I did and really enjoyed it. RE was a good cook. He would not let me cook anything. We would sit in the car port in the cool of the evening and as dusk approached watch the chickens come up and fly into the tree there to roost for the night. There were lots of birds chirping and flying around. The only cardinal I ever saw was present on most evenings. Anyway, except for that one time, I always stayed at the Hope house on my visits home. One evening I was sitting in "Henry's room" in Big's house with the woman TJ had hired to house sit for him while he was working weekdays in Texas for Uncle Frank. Nell marched into the room and sat down facing me. She did not knock at the front door which was unlocked in those days. Without addressing either one of us she launched into a tirade directed at me accusing me of taking sides in the dispute and abandoning the person who had always provided my livelihood. I listened to what she had to say without comment. She got up and marched out. The house sitter said something like "wow, how did you control yourself?" One comment she made stuck with me, something like "now, he had to pay for the house twice." This means to me that TJ talked a lot with Nell about this situation and it bothered him to the point that Nell felt that she had to support him and to attack someone in his behalf and I was the only one convenient. Of course, I never knew and don't know now, the details of all this and therefore could not through logic or reason 'choose a side.' To me it was just very, very sad to see a brother and sister, both of whom I loved, feel such animosity for each other. Anyway, that's mostly why I always thought the house was at the focal point of the controversy. Now, I'm not so sure. It definitely was a significant point, probably the most significant, but after thinking intently about all this, I'm thinking that there had to be more to it. From my own experience, I have lost money through carelessness, poor judgment, been outsmarted, through fraud, bank failure and each time I was strongly mentally disturbed by it; but with time the disturbance waned and finally never thought about again. But in TJ's case, I think he never reconciled with Vivian. Therefore, I wonder if there wasn't more to it than the house.
At the beginning of this dialogue, you questioned TJ's bitterness and what might have caused it. What do you think now? Did Vivian ever discuss her relationship with TJ in those final times with you?
I do recall that she commented briefly to me about the Big incompetence hearing where she was named controller of the estate and Mary controller of the person. I recall that she said something like "the judge said the deed of the house is in Ruth's name which means she is the owner of the house. Does anyone have any objections to this?" Vivian said that no one said anything, so the judge declared Ruth the owner of the house and the house part of her estate. Vivian did not say who was present at the competence hearing, but you would think all three children would be there. So, if TJ was there and he didn't speak up, he only has himself to blame for the "loss" of the house. If he wasn't there, why didn't Vivian or Mary speak up? They were both aware that TJ paid for the house and provided livelihood for both Vivian and me for a significant portion of our lives. And he paid for Vivian's registered nurse training at Warner Brown Hospital in El Dorado. So, why didn't someone speak up? The judge offered an opportunity. If TJ wasn't there, why not? Surely he wasn't banned from the hearing for some reason.
What are your thoughts and comments about all of this?
Well, I have exhausted myself here.
ON 21 AUGUST MELISSA WROTE:
Thinking about livelihood-Big made some money from renters and I assume she collected some social security at some point. I don’t know if mom worked at all. Don’t remember hearing about that. Could she have paid TJ back when she started working?
Yes, I think his bitterness was deeper than the last fight. He was also mad at the Gunters too. Maybe mad because he got a bad hand in life. He did not join the army for WWII which is interesting. Interesting to think about what people chose and did not chose.
Thanks for the continuing discussion of family history.
I have been thinking when Big moved to Hope. It had to be 1939. Mom graduated from Harrell high school and that should have been 1921+18=1939. Don’t you think?
ON 21 AUGUST MELISSA WROTE:
So I guess you were in the second grade then. Moving in the winter time rather than when school was out?
Did not know that TJ paid for moms education. Are you sure about this? Of course how else could she have paid for this! Warner Brown nursing school. Makes sense to me then why TJ thought he was the boss. You know of course he did not like dad at all. Probably mad about moms first marriage. Do you know anything about that? I know he drank and mom left him after having Ruth Ann.
Poor TJ. I don’t think anyone got along with him. I thought you had a better relationship with him. I know when mom was cleaning bigs house she gave furniture to Nell. Does that mean that she and Mary inherited the house from him. I suppose that they originally needed money for Big’s nursing home payment and so TJ paid them. Did he leave a will? I was in graduate school so I knew little about this fight. I do remember mom being very upset.
Yes, I think Big was mad at TJ about Nell. Maybe she saw her mistreating him. We all want people to stand up for themselves.
I did not know that Mary was mistreating Big in nursing home. Wonder if mom knew this?
So many questions and some unpleasant memories too.
Thanks for thinking through this with me.
You are right. Moving in the winter time rather than when school was out just doesn’t make sense. I may have a solution that includes that memory. It is interesting how a new question or a new thought can activate long dormant memories, isn’t it? Now I have three independent memories that may coincide relative to the move from Harrell to Hope. Two we discussed previously but did not relate them to each other. The third is a new one. One: we have the memory of a new and unfamiliar place, fabulous toys, cold – fireplace for warmth. Two: we have renovations going on in the Hope house. New wall paper in most rooms and new cabinets in the kitchen. Three: New. I definitely remember Irma driving Bill, Jr. and me to school at Brookwood school. Now let me see if I can connect the three memories into a reasonable and logical scenario. I think that we agree that the move most likely was in 1939. That would mean that Vivian completed high school in Harrell and I completed second grade in Harrell in June 1939. Then during the summer of 1939 the planning and preparation for the move took place. A renter was found for the Harrell house and a house was identified in Hope for Ruth’s family. Ruth & family moved out in August and a renting family moved into the Harrell house. Unfortunately the Hope house was not ready for occupancy. So, Ruth and family moved into Warren’s house until the Hope house was ready for occupancy. The refurbishment of the house dragged on way past schedule and the move from Warren’s house to the Hope house was not made until after Christmas. Work was continuing in the Hope house when Ruth and family finally moved in. Probably Irma was completely worn out with Ruth’s family invading her tranquility for four months. This could contribute to the apparent ill feelings between Irma and Ruth. If this scenario is true, then I think it would show that Warren was the leader of the Gunter boys in Hope. He probably committed the family to helping his sister who was in dire need and when the Hope house was not ready for occupancy, he made the plan work by offering his own house perhaps against Irma’s wishes.
Mostly speculation. What do you think? Reasonable and logical?
ON 28 AUGUST MELISSA WROTE:
Yes that makes sense and is probable. I wonder too if that explains the Irma situation. Do you think Big was close to Warren? Maybe. Do u know whether Warren was the oldest? Must have felt like going to a rich house with all of those toys.
Surprised that Big’s house was fixed up for her. That was good. You have an amazing memory. I am so glad we had time to talk about this.
ON 1 SEPTEMBER JOHN WROTE:
OK. I am back to writing on the Family Narrative. I have been thinking about all the points you raised and the comments you made in your 3-emails-in-1-day message sent on 21 August which I printed out and have been referencing in my idle moments. But let me comment first on your most recent message of 28 August. Yes, I think that explains the Irma situation. Yes, I think Big and Warren were close. I think Warren initiated the move and made the new life happen for Ruth and her family. I never considered that about Warren before, but now I am convinced that is the case. No, Warren was not the oldest. He was the second. Wiley, who stayed with the farm at College Hill, was the oldest. The order was Wiley Ezra, Warren Hartsfield, Lizzie Fellows, Cora Belle, Annie Louise, Ruth, James Alfred, John Ross, Henry and Frank Pierce.
OK. Now to your previous extensive comments. I think that we have established that the move from Harrell to Hope was most likely in 1939. No, I did not know that TJ did not like RE. In fact I thought they got along OK. You know that TJ recommended and sponsored RE into the Masonic Order, didn’t you? First you had to have a member recommend you, then you had to have a member sponsor you. TJ did both for RE. They were both proud to be Masons. I know very little about Charles Jackson. I met him and went hunting with him. I liked him. I thought he was a nice guy. I think Vivian met him while in nurses training at Warner Brown. I was surprised when they divorced. I asked Vivian why. She said that he was an alcoholic and she could not continue to live with him. I didn’t understand that at the time, but I do now. Surely after all the books and movies on the subject, we all know that life with an alcoholic who will not admit it is hell. With my current knowledge, I think she did the right thing. I believe RuthAnn after many years finally made contact with Charles and went to visit him in the El Dorado area. I think he was married with family. I don’t recall RuthAnn saying anything about the alcoholism, but once you are under the spell you never get out. You just learn to control the urge and live with it. Ask Ruth Ann what she knows about this.
Yes, TJ is somewhat of a tragic figure. I really regret that he and Vivian apparently never reconciled. I also regret that I didn’t have sense enough to ask both of them what the argument was.
TJ did not have a will. He told me he was going to give everything to Frankie Lou. He did not mention Nell when he said this but I took it to exclude Vivian and Mary because of the argument. He also told this to Frankie Lou. After he died Frankie mentioned it to me. I told her I would ask Mary about that. Mary said “Well, she got the car.” There were two cars. One nice one and one well worn that TJ used to come and go from work. That’s the one Frankie got. I don’t know what happened to the nice one. I suggested to Frankie that she should not get involved with this, that she would eventually get Mary’s half of what ever there was. One day Mary and I were in the field near the Oscar barn and Mary gave a wide sweep of her hand and said “Someday all this will be yours.” I said “I don’t want it. Give it to Frankie Lou.” She was stunned and shocked which clearly showed on her face. You will recall that Mary told Frankie that she hated her. Well, when Mary died she did not have a will but she had my name as beneficiary on some of her estate and the rest of it was divided between Frankie and me by law. I signed all my interests over to Frankie, so finally that loop was closed back to Frankie. I felt that she had earned it. She had lived right there at the Lion’s mouth all those years. Well, anyway, back to TJ. He did not have a will, so everything went to the next of kin – his two sisters, excluding Nell. I vaguely remember being in what could have been a conference room with Vivian and a legal person, probably the lawyer who was helping Vivian with the escrow of the assets. There was a box of papers and documents. It could have been the contents of a safe deposit box. The lawyer said “here is a CD for twenty thousand made out to Nell Moxley.” Vivian said “let her have it.” He said “you don’t have to.” Vivian repeated “Let’s let her have it.” So it’s not surprising that Vivian passed to Nell the items that she wanted. I was there and was asked what I wanted. I only took Big’s bible. I was traveling at the time and really could not accept anything. As I recall you took the Noritake china that I had sent to Big from Japan.
Regarding Big’s assets and income which we discussed in detail before, you are correct that there was some income from the government. I recall TJ and Vivian trying to get Social Security for Big when she was sixty-five but were unsuccessful because she had never paid in. Social Security was created by FDR in 1935, so CB never paid in either. I think they got legal help and finally got something. I recall their saying that it wasn’t much, but it was better than nothing. It may have been SSI which was available then and which is needs based for the aged, blind or disabled. I don’t recall if Vivian worked between high school and nurses training, but most likely she did. I know that Big always found a job for me in idle times. So, surely she did for Vivian too. Yes, although I never heard the subject discussed, I’m sure that Vivian paid TJ back for the nurses training costs. When I graduated from the UofA and was prepared to relocate to California I was short of cash, so I asked TJ for a loan of $1000 for the relocation. Soon after I settled in California I received a letter from Vivian telling me that I should pay the loan back as soon as possible. This letter was surely written from her own experience. Yes, TJ did not go to war in WWII. He was deferred by the Gunters as being essential to the war effort. He was one of their key workers. He remarked to me that he took some criticism from people with serving family members and he didn’t like the situation.
Well, I think that completes my comments on your points made in your emails of 21 August 2019. I’ll close the Family Narrative books for today, Sunday 1 September 2019.
ON 9 SEPTEMBER MELISSA WROTE:
Yes it is too bad it ended that way for mom, Mary and TJ.
I was thinking about the furniture in Bigs house. Do you know where the piano came from? It was a Victorian baby grand square ebony piano? I think Mary took it after Bigs death. Wonder where it is now?
Also, was the house set up for renters when the house was bought? I am guessing yes.
ON 12 SEPTEMBER JOHN WROTE:
In response to your email, the house must have been set up for renting at the same time it was set up for occupancy. As I recall there were renters present at the start and for a long time. At the beginning there was one two-room apartment downstairs, and two two-room apartments upstairs. Vivian and RE lived in one of the upstairs 2 room "apartments" until they got their own house there in Hope. Most of the time there were only the two two-room upstairs apartments. I don't know anything about the piano except that I took lessons and practiced on it. Big played it from time to time, probably practicing what she planned to play at the next Sunday service. I don't recall seeing it in Mary's little house on the highway. That was a very small house and I don't think Mary played any musical instrument.
ON 23 SEPTEMBER JOHN WROTE:
A point was raised about Big’s quilts. As I recall you and Ruth Ann had the choice of them when Big’s personal possessions were divided. I do vaguely remember Big and a group of women working on quilts in the room where Henry sat in his chair by the window reading the newspaper (Hope Star). I do recall that Big collected and saved scraps for quilting. It is possible that Mary took some of the material. I don’t know anymore about any of it.
ON 20 JANUARY 2020 JOHN WROTE:
I have been editing the Family Narrative and the Mary Story and in doing so have been searching my archives for any information pertaining to that. I found a photo of the front of the Harrell house. I don't know for sure who the people pictured are, but I'm sure that that is the Harrell house. Could the people in front be Big, Vivian and me? The photo must have been taken between about 1935 and 1939. The photo is significant because of the state of disrepair of the house. Look at the state of the steps going onto the porch. That is old deterioration - several years of neglect. This speaks to the financial state of the Johnston household at the time. The photo is on Page 25 of this narrative.
ON 22 JANUARY 2020 MELISSA WROTE:
Yes it looks like you and mom and big. Who else? I have never seen that picture. And the state of disrepair. The house in Hope would have looked wonderful.
I don’t know if I ever told you this, but I had several disagreements with TJ in my high school years. He was very opinionated, biased and prejudiced and aggressive. I remember thinking I did not like this so I avoided him and really did not talk to him again. It is amazing to me that I never discussed this with mom. The things we did not talk about.
ON 26 JANUARY 2020 JOHN WROTE:
Yes, (regarding the Harrell house photo which is on Page 25) I'm sure that the Hope house would have looked great although it required lots of repair before it was ready for occupancy - and even after it. Repair went on with our living in there. I think that that photo of the Harrell house tells us a lot. The disrepair is very significant. That disrepair has been there for a long time. Ruth did not have the money to repair it. Labor, albeit mostly untrained, would have been available and cheap. Little money and little hope for the future. Then the move to Hope - the new situation would have been a change of life for all of us. Family income secured and hope for the future. And Big happily (surely) joining her brothers and sisters.
I'm attaching a photo to this email that you have seen before. It is on Page 10 of this narrative. It is of Mary and me on the occasion of her graduation from Artesian High School. I told you in my last email that I have been busy editing the Family Narrative and the Mary Story. Both Frankie Lou and I are convinced that in this photo, Mary is unmarried and pregnant with Frankie Lou.
ON 29 JANUARY 2020 MELISSA WROTE:
Wow unmarried with Frankie Lou? So how old was she when she had you. 2 unmarried pregnancies. Was she about 18 in this picture? This had to be a scandal. Right?
ON 1 FEBRUARY 2020 JOHN WROTE:
Yes, unmarried and pregnant with Frankie Lou. I’m convinced of it. She was 19 years, 14 days old when she delivered me. I place her age in that picture at about 21 years, 10 months old. I’m also convinced that she did not know that she was pregnant in this picture. All she knew was that she had had casual sex with Frank Weisinger during the senior high school year in Artesian, Arkansas. I’m also convinced that she had graduated and returned to Harrell to live with the family and be my mother. Then it was discovered that she was pregnant and was told to go see if Frank would marry her. He agreed and they moved into a little two room house near the Oscar Witherington property that she and Frank would spend a lifetime working. I’m convinced that this is the way it was. It just makes sense and any other scenarios have great faults.
ON 11 FEBRUARY 2020 MELISSA WROTE:
Wow that is amazing about Mary. Pregnant again and not married. Amazing she returned to high school after having you. Do u suppose that she was shamed by the family and society? And wonder how this affected mom and TJ? Do you think TJ was an angry person at that time? I don’t think TJ was in favor of mom marrying dad. You know we have no idea about the personality of our grandfather. He was smart and accomplished, but what else?
ON 13 FEBRUARY 2020 JOHN WROTE:
Regarding Mary - I don't see how shame could not have figured in the equation regarding that activity, especially at that time. There was really a lot of stigma associated with promiscuousness and infidelity at that time. There was even stigma associated with divorce in those times. However, I think that the desperate situation and turmoil in the Johnston household with CB dying in horrible and desperate conditions and Big having to control and organize the entire family life would have dictated that Mary be relocated to Artesian in the home of an unknown benefactor to deliver the child and finish high school. Taking care of Mary and the child would have been just too much for Big in that desperate situation. The situation as it unfolded would have overwhelmed a lesser person. I think Vivian and TJ must have had very negative thoughts about Mary and her leaving home at the time CB was dying and Big needing to have all hands on deck. And then when she got pregnant again unmarried, they must have thought Mary was completely without redemption. I think Big planned and arranged for Mary to get her high school degree knowing that life without it would be extremely difficult. And I think in that planning, Big thought that after high school graduation Mary would return to Harrell to rejoin the family and then all together, without CB, they would proceed as a family. Of course when Mary discovered that she was pregnant, she had to try to get Frank to marry her which he did and that dictated Mary's future. I don't recall TJ being an angry person. I do recall his thinking that he was the master of the family. And he had reason for this attitude. He was the 'breadwinner' for all of us at that crucial time. And he was in his teens then, just out of high school. This is the second time you have mentioned that you thought TJ was not in favor of the RE - Vivian marriage. You must have heard either Vivian or TJ or both talking about this. I don't recall TJ ever saying anything negative about RE, but now that I have thought more about this I do vaguely recall TJ speaking despairingly about the Mohon family. I did hear from both TJ and RE that TJ recommended and sponsored RE for membership in the Masonic Order. You had to be recommended and sponsored to become a Mason. Both RE and TJ were proud of their memberships. So, I thought that they got along all right. Maybe, TJ mellowed after he got to know RE. Yes, you're right, we do not know anything about CB - just that he was a medical doctor and obviously did the best with what he had in his situation.
Frankie wrote the continuation of the Witherington – Weisinger saga over several letters. I paraphrase Frankie’s information and combine the several letters into this one paragraph. Frankie provided the information in her letters to me in 2020. Here it is.
Oscar Witherington was a gentleman farmer, meaning he was the owner of the land and he had other people work the land and derive a profit from it. His wife was named Clara. They lived in what was a big house in those days on top of the hill with a big barn adjoining. Onnye and Margaret Lucinda Weisinger lived in the area. We know now that the Weisinger family consisted of the Father and Mother and the children, Frank, Thomas, Mollie, Gladys, Lucille and Bernice. We now know that Margaret gave birth to Frank and Tom, but Oscar was the father. Onnye discovered Margaret’s indiscretion and left her. It is not known if Clara knew about the indiscretion. Oscar and Clara did not have any children. Margaret died when Frank was about nine years old. Mollie (Frank’s older sister) and Jim Grant, who did not have children of their own, then raised Frank and Thomas. This could have been with the assistance of Oscar and Clara. There is much we don’t know here, but we do know that as an adult Frank was working on the Witherington farm and most likely still living with Mollie and Jim. Mary came to the field where Frank was working to inform Frank that she was pregnant (with Frankie Lou). Frank did the honorable thing and they married. At first they lived in a small two room house across the creek from the Oscar farm. They eventually moved into the little four room house on the highway bordering the Witherington property when it became available and were the principal workers/managers of the Witherington property. When Oscar died the 80 acre farm and the little four room house and associated buildings went to Frank and Mary. Clara had the big house on the hill and half of the Oscar barn, which she sold and went to Hampton to live with her sister. Thomas received the Oscar vehicles and some money. Cotton lost its value as a subsistence crop and both Frank and Mary began other work. Frank began to complain of severe headaches and was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. Frank died of the tumor at age 58. Mary continued to live in the little house on the highway for many years, but finally moved into a small apartment in Hampton. She was living there when she died of a stroke on 31 July 2000 at age 88.
This is the Big - CB home in Harrell as it is today, January 2020. Note the street sign on the left – JOHNSTON AVE.
This is the Johnston family home in Hope, Arkansas. The family moved here in 1939 from Harrell with the aid of Ruth’s brothers. This was then the home of Ruth until she was placed in a Hope nursing home after having her first stroke. She was subsequently moved to a nursing home in Hampton, Arkansas where she died at the age of 93. This continued to be the ‘family’ home until the death of TJ in 1983.
The Johnston Family home in Harrell, Arkansas as it was in the 1935 to 1939 period. Note the disrepair of the front steps leading onto the porch. This appears to be from years of neglect, attesting to the family financial situation in that period. This is significant. With labor cheap and available, still funds could not be committed to this repair. Times were indeed dire in the Johnston household. The people in the photo are Ruth, Vivian and John. The woman with the hat is unknown.
The principal contributors to this narrative are Melissa Sue Mohon Papineau, John Charles McLeod and Frankie Lou Weisinger Means. Melissa now lives with her husband, William Edward Papineau, in Wichita, Kansas. John lives with this wife, Tamiko Tagusari, in Reno, Nevada. Frankie Lou lives with her son, Thom Means, in the family home in Woodberry, Arkansas. Here is the final resting place of the principal people named in this narrative.
Ruth Gunter Johnston, 31 December 1886 – 12 April 1980, is buried next to her husband, Charles Bennet Johnston, 12 November 1875 – 22 November 1932, in Dickinson Cemetery near Harrell, Arkansas. The cemetery is located 2½ miles East from Harrell on Highway 278, then North 2 miles on Road 38. Pleasant Grove Church is nearby.
Vivian Jane Johnston Jackson Mohon, 4 January 1921 - 21 September 1984, is buried in Snell Cemetery near Emmet, Arkansas. The ashes of her husband, R. E. Mohon, (8 September 1921 – 11 January 2017) rest to eternity with Vivian at that location. The cemetery is located in the outskirts of Emmet, southeast on Road 14 then left on Battle Estate Road.
Mary Frances Johnston McLeod Weisinger, 7 September 1912 – 31 July 2000, is buried with her husband, Frank W. Weisinger, 5 November 1912 – 7 February 1979, in Pickett Cemetery near Hampton, Arkansas. Their two infant boys are also buried there; Barry Lynn, 1943 – 1944, and Kenneth Wayne, 1945. The cemetery is located 7 miles south of Hampton, West of Highway 167 at the junction of Roads 146 and 27. Antioch Church is nearby.
TJ Johnston, 21 June 1917 – 23 April 1983, is buried in Memory Gardens Cemetery at 403 South Main Street in Hope, Arkansas. His long time girlfriend, Eva Nell Moxley, 8 February 1918 – 13 November 2004, is also buried there.
TJ Johnston retired from sawmill work in 1982 at age 65. He was living in the Hope house at 707 East Division Street. He had always done most of the work around the house and very seldom hired outside help. The rain gutters in the house required cleaning. TJ failed to accept that he was now elderly and with less coordination, balance and strength. He undertook this task, one he had always done himself. He fell from the roof, injuring himself and was confined to the hospital. He chose not to go to the care of our family doctor, Dr. Jim McKinsey, in the Branch General Hospital where Vivian was the Chief of Nurses; but went to another hospital instead. Vivian commented that he would not receive optimum care in the facility that he chose. While confined in the hospital he suffered a heart attack and died, ten months after retiring. He had been a smoker for most of his life. While the fall did result in severe injury, surely it was demon tobacco that took his life.
Vivian was the Chief of Nurses at Branch General Hospital. In addition to her administration tasks, she also worked in the cancer ward of the hospital. She developed a chronic cough. Dr. McKinsey, who she worked with there, kept urging her to check out the cough. Finally she made a chest X-ray. She told me “when I saw those X-rays I knew I was looking at my death warrant.” She had lung cancer. She had been a smoker most of her life and was a smoker then. She had surgery but all the cancer could not be removed. She was given six months to a year to live. In about a year the cancer returned. It was demon tobacco taking another life.
I, John McLeod, also smoked as a youngster as most people did in those days. I smoked for about ten years and finally became disgusted with the filthy habit. This was before we knew that tobacco could and most likely would kill you if you used it. Ridding myself of the demon tobacco was the most difficult thing I did in my life. I attribute a heart attack I suffered in 1999 to the demon tobacco. Today I continue life with high risk from cardio vascular disease. I wrote a blog about the demon tobacco. Create a hyperlink on your computer with the following address, click on it, and you can read the blog. If you are reading this on a computer connected to the Internet, that is a hyperlink. Just click on it. https://JohnArk.Tumblr.com/tagged/tobacco
This is a photograph of many of the family members on the occasion of the 90th birthday of Ruth (Big) taken in the family residence in Hope.
From the left: Ruth, Vivian, Mary, Kristie in front of Vivian & Mary, TJ, Melissa, Cindy, Melinda, Frankie Lou, RuthAnn, Amy in front of RuthAnn.
Melissa and RuthAnn are the daughters of Vivian.
Frankie Lou is Mary’s daughter. I (not pictured) am Mary’s son.
Cindy and Melinda are Frankie Lou’s daughters.
Kristie and Amy are RuthAnn’s daughters.
Some of the Means Family is celebrating a Special Occasion with Mary. Pictured left to right standing are: Tory Walker, Jimmy Wilson, Shannon Means, Melinda Means Wilson, Frankie Lou Means, Alice Ann Means Hicks, Ashleigh Ann Means, Winkie Temple, Margaret Cindy Means Franklin, Kevin Bee Means, Terri Johnson Means. Pictured left to right kneeling or sitting are: Kaye Means Hurst, Derrick Means, Mary Frances Johnston McLeod Weisinger, Andy Jo Hurst, Bradley Cole Means, Thom Means.
FROM LEFT: Bradley Mohon Papineau, Mateus Lima, Melissa Mohon Papineau, Anne Papineau Nelson, Mikael Nelson, William Edward Papineau.
In this narrative we have briefly stated that Big cared for her dying husband in difficult circumstance in Harrell in the early 1930s and later cared for her dying mother in her home in Hope. The comments about Big’s caring for her mother, Martha Frances, are on Pages 4 and 6 of this narrative. I observed this and was amazed at Big’s skill, patience, compassion and strength both physically and mentally in dealing with what I observed as a very difficult person and difficult situation. I was just a kid at the time, but I was mature enough to recognize an extraordinary life and death event unfolding in that room and appreciate what I was seeing. But even more extraordinary and astounding as well is how deplorable conditions, devastating events, surprising and disappointing betrayals around the final two years of the life of her husband, Dr. Charles Bennett Johnston (CB), were met with such extraordinary determination, loyalty, skill, organization, perseverance, compassion, dedication, endurance, improvisation, stamina, grit, moxie – need I go on? This was indeed an extraordinary situation confronted and overcome by a more than equally extraordinary person. I want to add to what has been said about this in this narrative on Pages 2, 21, 22 and 23.
Let me start by trying to establish the situation in the Johnston household in the late 1920s and early 1930s. Vivian told me that Charles B. Johnston died of Parkinson’s disease. This disease is a progressive, untreatable, incurable nervous system disorder manifested with movement disorders, autonomic dysfunction, neuropsychiatric problems among others. The end stage of Parkinson’s is an extremely distressing situation. Today hospice takes over at that point. Family cannot provide or endure care at that point. CB probably suffered with incontinence, insomnia, dementia, hallucinations, severe posture issues with back, neck, hips and was surely bedridden. Just think of a bedridden heavy man, drooling, urinating uncontrollably, with induced diarrhea to relieve constipation, depressed, and demented. It would have been impossible for Ruth to have cared for CB alone. However inexpensive, inexperienced assistance could have been available from the black community. Surely Ruth would have expected assistance from her children – Vivian 9 or 10, TJ 13 or 14 and Mary 16 or 17. The situation in CB’s room must have been hell. And probably smelled that way, too. Hell at that point and the future very bleak. The country was in the midst of the depression with 30% of the work force unemployed. Is this the reason that Mary dropped out of school, abandoned her family and ran away with Frank McLeod? What about family loyalty, personal responsibility, conscience? What did Ruth think when her oldest daughter abandoned her in the time of most need? Yes, abandoned. Fled. That’s the way it looks to me. Yes, living with Frank would have been “wonderful” compared to the hell that existed in the Johnston household. Had she stayed with Frank, as it turned out, it would have been a blessing for Ruth. But rather than escape from it, Mary returned just in time to add to that hell and responsibility for Ruth. I was born on 21 September 1931. CB was in the last, tortured year of his life. He died on 22 November 1932. So, in summary, the situation for Ruth at the return of pregnant Mary was: caring for CB in the direst and most demanding period of his declining health, supervising untrained CB care givers, caring for two high school children, managing a household, managing the family finances, and now Ruth has to organize the care of Mary and the child and deal with Frank McLeod. Probably Mary demanded that Ruth force Frank to marry her. The fact that Frank sent her home probably meant that he would not easily agree to this. Hiring an attorney and settling the situation through the courts if required was most likely out of the question because of finances, time element, physical location and life and death responsibilities. Probably in the interests of a quick settlement of the issue, Ruth and Frank agreed upon marriage, separation, no contact, no responsibility. And Frank went happily on his way, leaving Mary angry, distraught and pregnant. This situation would surely have overwhelmed a lesser person. That house in Harrell, still standing in 2020 (Page 25), is a small one and could not physically accommodate all the activity thrust upon Ruth. So, Ruth organized an unknown benefactor in Artesian, Arkansas (Map Page 33) to take in pregnant Mary and care for her and her child. Ruth organized for Dr. J. E. Rhine of Thornton, Arkansas to deliver the child. Today unmarried mothers is a common situation. In those days there was an immense stigma associated with this. Even divorce carried a stigma. Was the Artesian relocation for Mary to relieve her of the humiliation by her classmates, and perhaps relieve Ruth of the humiliation by her peers in Harrell? I don’t think so. I think it was just a byproduct of the situation; that the relocation was dictated by the turmoil in the Johnston household at the time. It was life and death “crunch time” in the Johnston household and Ruth did not have time for social contemplations. Probably Ruth did not have the time or the inclination to convince Mary that this was the best course of action. She probably just informed Mary that this is what we are going to do and it is not open for discussion. If this is the way it was, and this supposition is logical in this circumstance, then it very well could have been a great point of contention and resentment Mary had for Ruth. So Mary went to Artesian, had the child and nursed to the weaning point where the child was sent to Harrell and Big’s care and Mary completed her high school education. Surely Ruth arranged this knowing that in the future Mary would be severely limited without at least a high school education. Ruth continued the management of the Johnston household which entailed the hospice care of CB; going into that room with its fetid, malodorous odor with compassion, skill and determination; the care of two school children; providing food for all of them; and financial control with dwindling resources, no income, no safety net from prior work or the federal government and the country in the midst of The Great Depression with 30% of the work force unemployed. Accomplishing all of this with a bleak future facing her could have been completely overwhelming, but she safely steered her ship of household through this massive storm to calm waters after the death of CB on 22 November 1932. The hell that had dominated the household for several years was passed, but the financial situation remained extremely dire. There was no income and the Great Depression and its effects loomed large. Now Ruth used her imagination and ingenuity. She began serving noon-time meals to the nearby railroad workers for twenty five cents per meal. The former college professor and wife of the town doctor found a way to overcome every obstacle. The next event confronting Ruth was the return to the family of Mary with her Artesian high school diploma, shown in photos on Page 10. It was soon discovered that Mary was once again pregnant. This revelation had to be distressing to say the least for both Mary and Ruth. I think this is where TJ told Mary ‘why can’t you keep your pants on?’ This infuriated Mary and she never forgot it. As stated in this narrative on Page 13, Mary, now an adult, nearly 22 years old and responsible for her own actions, was sent to the Witherington farm where her Artesian schoolmate, Frank Weisinger, was working to inform him that she was pregnant with his child and to see if he would marry her. He did the honorable thing and married her. Frank was a handsome, but simple man. His mind and world revolved around what was needed and what was required in the life of a ‘share cropper,’ which is essentially what he was. He had no vision of further education, of art and culture – only the farmer life that was presented to him. So Mary now the adult, nearly 22 years old, the daughter of a college professor and doctor, was left with the prospects and situation that she had created.
The Johnston household in Harrell continued with little money and scant hope for a better future. Even in very limited circumstances, Ruth never lost her sense of humor. A story she obviously told Vivian and which Vivian told me involved a hefty eater among the lunch time railroad men. Finally Ruth informed the gentleman that she was going to have to increase his meal price to thirty cents. He replied “Oh, Mrs. Johnston, I wish you wouldn’t do that. I have enough trouble now eating twenty five cents worth.” So in 1934 the Johnston household continued with its meager resources supporting Ruth, TJ, Vivian and John. This was the situation for the next four years. Then in the 1938 – 39 time frame Ruth’s brothers came to her rescue. They were prospering in the sawmill business in Hope, Arkansas. They invited the family to move to Hope and offered TJ an important job in the sawmill. The Johnston household world was transformed. The move to Hope, new situation and a change of life. The family income secured and hope for the future. Ruth happily joining her brothers and sisters with bright and unlimited prospects for her children and me. Mary was left with her prospects and situation that she had created.
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