āBye, Shoyo,ā Oikawa waves, closing the door on his face. He lets out a breath before finally turning to look at you, fidgeting with your fingers as you felt as if the room was too small with the two of you here.
āY/n-chan!ā He beams, throwing his arms around you in an instant. He brought you close to himself, humming in content as he intoxicated himself with the scent of you. You did the same too, despite the weirdness of it all with the sudden contact, you wrapped your arms around him tight, inhaling the all too familiar scent of Toru laced with a bit of alcohol.Ā
He finally pulls away after what seemed like the shortest hug, glancing down at you and maybe a little too long at your lips.Ā āYou missed me, didnāt you?ā He smiles, thumb brushing lightly across your cheek.Ā
You canāt help but grow flustered as seen by the pink tint on your cheeks that was evident to him.Ā āWhat are you doing here Toru?ā You ask, taking a step back to avoid his touch that distracted you from reason.
āWhy are you pulling away from me?ā He asks, brows raising and eyes holding a sad and confused look in them. You only sigh at him, recalling how Hinata said he was too drunk.Ā
āCāmon, you can lie down on the bed,ā you tug on his wrist, but to your surprise, he twists his arm and holds your wrist instead, pulling you to him as you stumbled and crashed against his chest.Ā āToru,ā you say unsurely, your hands against him while his arms wrapped around your waist.Ā
āYou shouldnāt have kissed him in front of me,ā he whispers lowly, both your hearts breaking excruciatingly in unison at his words.Ā āYou shouldnāt have let me leave like that,ā he says more loudly, arms falling down from your waist and limply to his sides.Ā Ā
āYou needed to leave,ā you shamefully say, looking down to avoid his gaze that not once left your face.Ā āBut I was going to marry you.ā Your eyes go wide at his words and tingles crawl through your skin as he brought his hand up; a gentle finger lifting the ring on your necklace from inside your shirt.Ā
He lets out a small sarcastic chuckle.Ā āWhy? Whatās this supposed to mean y/n?ā You flinch at the coldness of his tone.Ā āThis was supposedly thrown away, am I wrong?ā He taunts bitterly at you who fell silent.
āYouāre making a fool out of me again, did you not break me enough?ā He asks; maybe it was the alcohol or maybe it was the pain that never left him all these years, all he knows is that he wanted you to know how much you made him feel dead inside.Ā
āThatās not it,ā you desperately say, shaking your head as you look at him.Ā āI did love you!ā A cold and unexpected glare was pointed at you,Ā āIāve always loved you,ā you say pleadingly, hoping heād believe you.Ā
āThen what? You did all those things for me? You make me laugh, y/n,ā he scoffs, looking away as tears blurred his vision. Hearing those words, especially from you, it was too hard to breathe now, his chest just hurts.Ā
āI did do it for you! I was out of options, you wouldnāt listen to me at all! It was all there was left to do and you have to believe me!ā Your voice raising slightly as your tears finally fell.Ā
āYou kissed him in front of me!ā You flinch, and seeing you that way made him regret it all too soon.Ā āYou hurt me y/n,ā he whispers in defeat,Ā āI was so sure that Iād never be okay again for the rest of my life.ā
āIām sorry,ā you choke out.Ā āI know I hurt you, but I didnāt want you to give up on this Toru, look at you now, youāve made your dreams a reality.āĀ
āBut at what cost?ā He asks you and you were rendered speechless. At what cost, indeed.
āYou love me, Iāll believe you; but thatās just how you are, arenāt you? You decide things on your own, you think you know better. Youāre always so willing to hurt me, you wouldnāt even bat an eye as long as āit was for meā, you say,ā he scoffs.Ā
āDid you even stop and think to ask me? Was this truly better? It wasnāt like I couldnāt continue playing volleyball in Japan, whyād you have to force me away from you like that? Iād break down at the most random of times y/n and it has been years! Iāve never been able to free myself from you,ā he sobs, his hand coming up to cover his eyes in frustration.Ā
He cries with you, the both of you trying your bests to just stop, but neither of you could do it.Ā Ā
After a while, he had brought himself to hold your hand, guiding you towards your bed.Ā āToru?ā You ask him questioningly.Ā āYouāre leaving tomorrow, right?ā He asks, looking at you with puffy eyes and a small smile. You nod.Ā
āThen let this be the last time Iāll cry for you,ā he says, gently pushing you down the bed.Ā āWha-ā
āRelax y/n,ā he muses, climbing in bed beside you.Ā āIāll be gone when you wake up,ā he says, noticing how you were hesitantly looking at him as he lay down while you remain sat up.Ā
Was it so much to hope for that you wanted him to stay?Ā
You finally lie down, turning around to have your back to him. Although caught off guard, you donāt say anything or move an inch when he presses his chest against your back, hugging you to him.Ā āThis couldāve been our life every night y/n-chan,ā he whispers sadly, breath fanning against your neck.Ā
Iāll be gone when you wake up, you recall his words.Ā āStay,ā you whisper softly, and you could feel him tense against you.Ā āStay with me Toru,ā you grip his arm that was around your waist.Ā
As if you hadnāt cried enough, your tears start to fall once more when he presses a soft kiss at the back of your neck, along with the necklace you wore.Ā āI canāt, you know I canāt.ā
āWhen it comes down to it, when you see another reason to, youād have no problem leaving me again,ā he buries his face in your shoulder.Ā āI know Iād rather die than go through that hell again.ā
āIām sorry,ā is all you manage to say before crying as silently as you can. It was indeed too much to hope and ask for, how could you even think that you had the right to be a part of his life again?Ā
He heard your sobs, and he holds you even tighter.Ā āLetās forget each other after tonight, yeah?ā He choked out with a small smile against your skin.Ā
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