Rating the vampire emojis on Emojipedia
This is so not my idea on several levels but as soon as a certain someone suggested it I decided I couldn’t NOT do it
Not too bad, but the lack of confidence makes me wonder if she’s even a real vampire. Actually, giving her a closer look, she looks like a recently-turned vampire who just got invited to the office’s Halloween party and is going to try and pass her looks off as a vampire COSTUME, but she’s really nervous about it. I personally think it’s a bad idea too, but godspeed. 7/10.
This vampire’s hair is TOO nice. I don’t trust it. That’s like, one step removed from Edward Cullen in a cape, and maybe that’s exactly what he’s banking on. Sure, that could make for a good vampire, but even if you’re holding up a façade of charming harmlessness in order to find prey, you don’t take THIS GOOD care of your hair unless you sincerely like it, and I’ve never met a man with this hairstyle who isn’t insufferable. 5/10.
Is… is that a walrus? Did somebody throw a widow’s peak’d cap and a cape on a walrus? It could be cute, but it just looks awfully uncomfortable. 3/10.
Okay, that’s cute, the lady going to the Halloween party is bringing her daughter along. She’d better tell her the truth about being a creature of the night once they go home, though. 8/10.
We have some variety here in that we have our first blonde, but at the same time I’m not sure how to feel about an emoji with this much eyeshadow. Also, is she even wearing anything under that?? She’s missing SOMETHING. 4/10.
Now look at that! A good, classic Dracula. His mouth is a little weird, but how could I possibly turn him down? 8/10.
This dude JUST became a Dracula and he’s fucking LOVING it. Can’t you just hear him saying he vants to sahk your vlahd? And honestly, with this much gusto, I couldn’t turn him down either. 9/10.
First, what the fuck is JoyPixels? Second, this is the Halloween party lady’s sire, coming to get her because holy shit, what is she thinking? And bringing her mortal daughter, too?? You’re not gonna be able to keep this up for long, Karen! Anyway, she’s trying very hard to blend in. The effort is admirable, but the combination of what appears to be a jacket, a sweater vest and a cape just looks like it would be uncomfortable to move in. 6/10.
Oh my god. He’s so sad. No wonder, because he looks terrible, but I can’t help felling sorry for him. Do you need a snack, OpenMoji Vampire? Would a sensual dance in front of a comically large mirror lift your spirits? Here, it’s okay. You can have a 7/10.
Jesus Christ, MDickie’s making vampire games now?
