âI know she wonât be perfect every day, but she will try her hardest to smile even if she just cried for a few hours. Sheâs an ocean of worry and the only lifeboat that might appear is you. She will smile when it matters, when it counts. Please, donât take her for granted. She is no longer a flower, I made sure of that. I ripped through every petal searching for soil that we once stepped on, I tried to search for the seed of love at first sight and Iâm sorry, I scratched the veins and she will probably wither in your palms. She no longer acts crazy, I made sure of that. I judged her for who she was and who she wasnât. She wonât show her true colors yet, sheâs testing you, youâre on trial. Sheâs watching you, and youâll feel like thereâs gasoline in her saliva and her kiss might be the spark to set you on fire. She wonât spam your text messages, she wonât write you cute letters, she wonât write short stories, and she wonât blow up your phone. I made sure of that. I know you wonât love her on some days, I know she wonât always be kind when you whisper a slick remark, I know she wonât enjoy long walks because sheâs always exhausted, sheâs always too tired and she wonât always be fun, but you have to bear with her, be gentle with her, be loving to her, be the net for her stomach butterflies, be the cloud to hold her tears, she knows how to come around. Some days she might be emotionally destroyed because of something I said to her a few years ago, Iâm sorry about that too. Some days she might be smiling from out of the blue and it might be spring and youâll ask, but she wonât tell you. Iâm sorry about that too. Some days sheâll be clingy, wait, she might be like that all of the time, shit, Iâm sorry about that too. You see, emotional and physical trauma comes in many forms and the people we tend to love can hurt us in the most messed up ways. I was that person, donât be that guy. Donât pick up poetry, youâll make her cry. Donât have sex with her just to have sex with her, donât. Notice her smile, notice the way she undresses her blossoms, take notes of the way her lotus tattoo breathes into your skin, pay attention to how her slow breaths can spell out your name, donât be caught up in the euphoria of the sin, be caught up with her body language and how she wants you to feel and itâs not that simple to move her heart, you must pay close attention to that one detail, do not let her stray, watch her eyes, grip her hands and speak lightness into her ears. Anyone can have sex, not everyone can make love. That is a truth I had to learn after five years with this person. And some days sheâll cry, and sheâll cry, and sheâll cry, and sheâll cry, and sheâll cry, and sheâll cry, and sheâll cry. Dude, itâs that time of the month again. Fucking hug her. Send her cute text messages. Give her belly-rubs. Bring her food. Give her fruits. Watch a show with her. Kiss her cheeks. Kiss her forehead. Kiss her fingers. Kiss her hands. Kiss her palms. Kiss her stomach. Kiss her arms. Kiss her lips. Kiss her heart. Kiss her soul. Kiss her. And if that doesnât work? Hold her. Hold her body like you were the big spoon made for her. Hold her like the stars grip the night sky. Hold her hands like her fingers could feel safe when they trace their ownerâs name into your back. Brush the tears from her cheeks and make sure they donât get away, make sure she feels that you care. Grab her heart and let her know that you love her even if all she did was cry today about how random sheâs being, how emotional this shit got and how real it got. Make sure you let her know, let her know that she is loved. You donât have to be like me. You donât have to write a thing. You just have to love her. Love her like how I couldnât. You donât have to be perfect. You just have to treat her perfectly. You donât have to be amazing. She just has to feel amazed. And I know, youâre probably thinking, what do you know? Youâre just an ex-boyfriend, thereâs a reason why she left you. Hey, wake up. Donât be selfish. This isnât about me or you. This is about her. You listen real good here, some people arenât meant to be together for all of eternity. It doesnât happen. It doesnât. We change. This is how you love her right. Treat her with respect, love her ways even if it doesnât make much sense, and I know she might set you on fire and I know she might make you passionate about everything, but thatâs how she is. A sapphire among rubies. A cloud in the volcanoâs steam. A sunset swimming in the ocean. A rose in a garden of forget-me-nots. A blood drop in a glass of water. A tear drying on lit cigarettes. A fox howling with wolves. A heart found near the river bank. A girl who just wants to be loved. And I know she isnât perfect, I know she wonât always be yours, I know she wonât be the best, I know she cries a lot, I know she isnât from magazine covers, I know she can be a handful, but I promise, I promise, if I know one thing. One thing at all. It is that she is worth it. Please, make her smile because she didnât smile enough when I held her, because she didnât feel loved when I kissed her, because she felt used and Iâm to blame, because she deserves happiness and well, so do you. This is how you love her and whatâs that famous quote? Oh yeah! This is how you keep her.â
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