[ 001 ] Andante, Andante
@tomboiwrites
Since the night of Belle's attempt - Jesse's whole life had revolved around this hospital. He was discharged from the clinic and left to fend the real world of adulthood on his own. He was still living at home with his mom, working at a vet clinic in between his house and Mount Sinai. He would go, help take care of his second love - animals and then always end his days sitting by Addie's bedside, reading from the massive stack of books around the room.
His days were somber, the bags under his eyes growing darker and darker with each passing week. The only light at the end of he tunnel was the night nurse, Dakota. She checked in on the pair every night, brining Jesse extra coffee and snacks ( that he wouldn't eat ). After some time, they started to talk. Get to know one another. Sometimes time would literally escape them. The two talking until the sun rise behind the blinds. Jesse opened up about his eating disorder, about his immense love for Adelaide and how much pain her attempt caused him. She talked about her doctor family and the cruel pressure they put on her to stop nursing and become a "real doctor."
This went on for months, until one fateful night. Dakota had walked into the room, her shift had just ended, but she had no plans on going home. Instead she pulled up a chair and was forcing Jesse to eat a pudding cup after not eating the whole day. Soon they were going back and forth, talking about some sort of grumpy old man patient down the hall. He - over a long period of time - finally finished his pudding cup. He leaned over to put the cup down and turned back to see Dakota leaning in. He was powerless against her. The way the hospital lighting rounded her face. Her sweet eyes - caused a purely physical reaction, and he met her halfway, the two melting into one another right away.
It all happened so fast. Before they could even think about the fact they were making out in front of Addie's lifeless body - Dakota was in his lap. They couldn't avoid it for much longer. They had feelings for one another. They started seeing one another. Running away to make out in the on call room. Jesse sleeping over at Dakota's place. Just sleeping. Dakota never pushed Jesse to into bed. Despite finding him to be the most beautiful person she's met - she knew it would take time before he would ever give her what he only gave to one other person before.
It was officially their three month anniversary - when Jesse couldn't hide behind his dysmorphia anymore. He wanted him and Dakota to be the real thing. He wanted to go all the way with her. But first, he would need to officially break up with Addie. Even though she was in coma, they were still together. He got a bouquet of her favorite flowers; went down to her room. A walk he could now do in his sleep. He sat beside the bed, taking her lifeless hand in his, it feeling slightly warmer than usual. But he carried on nevertheless.
"Adelaide. Addie. Words can not explain how awful I feel right now. You - sitting here - looking so - so - so dead. It breaks my heart every time. Why did you have to do this ??" The tears began to well up. "I thought I made you happy. I don't know where I went wrong." He gathered himself, looking at anywhere in the room but the lifeless body in front of him. "Just know that I love you. - I love you so fucking much. But I can't keep waiting for you to return to me. I can't keep hope that you'll even want me if you wake up." One last large breath. "I need to find my happiness. And it's not here. We need to break up."