Primary vs secondary does not make sense to me. The idea that one can love another less just because they got there later ⊠Is an odd one. Because by debating primary vs secondary, itâs implying that love is hierarchical. Decided behaviour is hierarchical, love is not. And the fight to keep the distinction between primary and secondary just hurts everyone.
People don't understand that it's not about who you love more or that it's a competition for someone's love.. each live is different and unique and built differently. You can't compare the love of someone you've been dating for 5+ years with someone you've dated for two months, it's not fair or right. Once you understand that it's all different and unique then you'll understand and learn to love polyamory that much more.
















