I'd rather make you laugh than to tell you how much I hurt. To be honest, I am hurting. The drinking heavy part is now explained. Let's just leave it alone and one day I will be ok again.
Anyone who knows me well enough knows a few things.
1. I have no real belief in anything.
2. I hate myself.
3. I really hate life
and 4. I'm a musical maniac.
With all that said; at first I absolutely hated this band. It wasn't because of the vocals or the instrumentals or anything like that. I think I hated the band mostly because that's what boys do. I mean seriously, you wanna look cool right? I was no exception. Then 2005 came around, I was at Zia Record Exchange and I was looking at the rock section. Under the new releases I saw the bands 3rd(official) album and I decided "fuck my friends" and picked it up. I would listen to it through a few times over that weekend and marvel at the artwork within in(lyrically and the album art which was rather amazing). I would later buy the remaining discography and I have been hooked since. The band I speak of is Coheed and Cambria. On the surface to most people, they will see an emo band with a man with a girly voice. To the many legions of fans, we see the last really great rock band. They have released an abundance of records but I really want to focus on the first 4. See at the time a lot of us were uninformed about the real meaning behind the music was until one day upon further inspection we realized that the music was the narrative of a really advanced story that one needs time to really study on. It's mostly told through comics apart from the albums and it details an inevitably sad science fiction story involving the Kilgannon Family and the impure bastards that threaten their existence. There are good people with the story but most are vengeful pricks who prey. I love to sit back or lay down and just play album after album and just interpret the song in my own ways. I still keep the characters in my mind but at the same time I'm playing out every scenario but keeping the beginning and end the same. See on Second Stage Turbine Blade there's a song called "God Send Conspirator" that always gets me. It's an amazing track and on the surface it is no more the rock anthem that you can really sing along to but within the innerverse that is the 'heed, it details one of the absolutely saddest points in the record. To this day the fact that I can see "Your dreams can't last forever" really makes me want to weep, in fact I have wept a lot to this bands music. Through break ups, hatred and even death the bands music has helped me. "In Keeping Secrets Of Silent Earth: 3" has the same effect. "A Favor House Atlantic" is such a pop friendly song but in reality it is probably one of the bands most incredibly violent songs. The song called "The light and the glass" is a really sad track which ends in tragedy of losing someone close. It ends with a sad piano track and then leads into the hidden song. The first 4 have hidden tracks which I find oddly funny. I remember one instance of crying through out the last 4 songs on "Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV Volume I: From Fear Through The Eyes of Madness" but not because I was in particularly sad but mostly because it just started to happen. I couldn't control how emotional the music made me. Then of course on "Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV Volume 2: No World For Tomorrow" where the story was believed to have ended, makes me sad for simply that reason. I honestly thought that the band was going to end there...little did I know I was wrong. I really have to thank them alot for that because from my memory, I don't believe there ever was a band that had this power over me. I remember seeing them in 2017 and although I enjoyed the set and all, I got turned down badly by a woman I am madly in love with...needless to say when songs like "Wake up" played I started to cry while most assholes had their lady friends with them and they were all kissing while my lonely ass wept. Well, if anything, the song isn't really that romantic if you really listen to it. Either way. I loved the way that show ended with Claudio Sanchez bringing out a portrait painted of him from someone down here in Arizona, to which Claudio said he liked it albeit freaking him out when he sees it at night. It's nice to know that the band is not at all that serious in real life. One thing I've always found hilarious about the band is the fact that Claudio is really bad at keeping a straight face. During the slower songs or slow parts of songs, Claudio looks into the crowds and I assume he sees an overly passionate fan singing along(probably me) and he'll flat out laugh. I remember when they were doing the song "Everything Evil" and during the Jesse parts, he kept laughing. Along with that Travis Stever likes to make goofy faces when Claudio's voice used to get ungodly high. Speaking of live, the first 4 albums were recorded live one majestic summer. They were then pressed up for a very limited box set titled "Neverender: Children of the Fence Edition". To the very few who own it, I hate you but then again it's my fault for sleeping on it...as a matter of fact, that was a year I didn't listen to the band. Which I find hilarious that I chose not to listen to the band at all. Another odd memory was when I got the "Live at the Starland Ballroom" record and would listen to it religously. Yeah it was pretty unclean audio wise but at the same time it gave it some charm. Claudio doing an Acoustic version of "The Light and the Glass" was fantastic. This also was the first time I heard men yell out to the band that they "want to have your children" and it definitely isn't the last which always makes me laugh. In spite of being what most plebs say, I don't believe them to be an emo band. The music can be emotional though and that's pretty much any band whoever wrote a song about pain. The reason for me writing this? Because I don't ever express how I really feel about anything anymore. I hate myself and life too much and I absolutely have no trust in anyone. Everyone to me is a traitor in waiting and they are all waiting for that moment I slip even the slightest. I mean sure I talk a lot of shit online but that's just it; shit talking. I hate everything and especially myself. I threaten sucide a lot but at this point in time it's almost like a chic thing to say. I'm trying to remain fabulous and hateful all at the same time. Regardless, the band is an amzing quartet and a huge influence on me and they are basically my therapy. I cannot praise them enough. I just wish they weren't coming to town when I'm gonna be dead broke.
turnnoffyourmind
yousharknotpass
dededos
andulkaphoto
origamiaround