[ isabelle fuhrman, twenty one, cis female, she/her ] — hey, is that [ kathryn ‘kasha’ smirnov ]? they’ve lived in portfield for [ four months ] working as a [ barista in bay leaf coffee shop ]. they’re known to be [ dedicated + inquisitve ], but watch out, they can also be [ impulsive + cynical ]. if you ask them, their aesthetic would be [ the still silence of a winter morning, kissing someone else’s shoulder, and the bruises between her knuckles that never seem to leave ].Â
hi all ! so excited to be a part of this rp with yall !! i’m mei, 18, est, she/her very friendly let’s dm and plot !
early childhood
kathryn’s mother ( irene bouchard ) and father ( dimitri smirnov ) were high school sweethearts, married right out of high school and living in the small quiet town of portfield. soon they had a baby, and they were happy... at least, irene was happy. dimitri on the other hand, was beginning to feel restless, having been cooped up in this small town his whole life, only ever leaving for hockey games.
when kasha was around seven years old, dimitri’s skill was exceeding everyone around him - and it wasn’t going unnoticed. what started with just a hobby had turned into a career, moving up in the local hockey world until he was offered a spot playing for the toronto maple leafs - and he took it, and he took kasha with him.
kasha doesn’t remember much about moving away from portfield, but she remembers sitting in the taxi with her favourite blanket clutched in her hands, as she looked out the window and watched her mother get smaller and smaller until she couldn’t see her anymore. and she never saw her again.
life elsewhere
once in canada, kathryn’s life changed, whether for better or for worse. she reaped all the benefits of being a professional. her father made good money, and she learned hockey from the best of the best.
she attended private school, she had everything she ever wanted, and she could do whatever she wanted, but what she never really had was a relationship with her mother. it wasn’t that they didn’t want a relationship, but it just got hard. daily phone calls became weekly, then monthly, and then at a certain point they stopped altogether, and kasha never knew really who her mother was.
when she turned 15, she decided to train more intensely. she wanted to follow in her father’s footsteps and become a smirnov legacy. she put in hours and hours of work everyday, studied old games, and made sure she stayed clean. kasha trained like her father did, for years. she was going to do this. kahtryn smirnov was going to play left wing for the toronto maple leafs. she was set on it - and she knew she could do it.
just after her 21st birthday, her father sat her down to talk. her mother had passed away from an illness, and she’d left everything in her name to kasha.
as soon as she was ready, she dropped everything and set south to portfield. this time, she watched as her father got smaller and smaller until she couldn’t see him anymore. she let herself cry for the first time in years.
moving forward
once arrived back in portfield, everything felt surreal. more or less, the city hadn’t changed at all, she swore she could even recognize some of the shopkeepers. entering her childhood home was surreal, the smell of her mother’s perfume and incense clung to the furniture and wallpaper. her mother’s jewelry, her clothes, her books, overwhelmed kasha with a feeling she couldn’t quite place.
kasha soon picked up a job at the toadstool flowershop. she didn’t need the money, but she wanted to feel closer to her mother, who had worked there before her. sometimes she feels her mother put a hand on her shoulder.
personalityÂ
as she started training more intensely, everything else mattered less to her, and less to her coaches. she didn’t have any free time, as that was time wasted. she couldn’t ever take a day off because she was tired or sad, that’s time wasted too. over the years, she absorbed the belief that her feelings didn’t matter.
since kathryn saw herself as nothing but a hockey machine, so did everyone around her. she’d been told so many microaggressions over the years she believed them to be fact. she wasn’t allowed to talk about how she was.Â
coping with the loss of a loved one is never easy, so how do you cope with the loss of someone you never knew? kasha’s inner dialogue has never been kind to her, but especially not now. after being clean her whole life, she began to smoke weed and cigarettes, and drink. she tries to keep these secret, but the smell of camels lingers on her clothes.
she is fast paced, and restless, afraid of what might happen if she sits still.
kathryn thinks she’s the funniest person on earth, she’s quick witted but her humor is often a defense mechanism.
kasha is incredibly dedicated. she can’t stop a project until it’s complete, so imagine her turmoil when she gives up on her entire life’s worth of work.
she likes to help others, but has a hard time helping herself.
possible connections
childhood friends
dealer
i want her to have a naggy responsible friend who she says is annoying but they both know they love each other a LOT
someone who hates her dad !! please i want this one so bad
mother’s friend ? maybe mother’s ... partner?