kav1.not.here

any pronouns,multi-fandom,DNI:proshippers and dark shippers

[kavin0there]

🦠!intro post!🦠

Hi,I'm Kavi or kavint. I go by any pronouns and my account is mostly for my own personal crackships and random content,I don't mind dms for mutuals

Principal fandoms!:

🦠error 143🦠

🦠 DETC 🦠

🦠 pokemon 🦠

🦠 Fallen Devotion 🦠

🦠 atsv 🦠

🦠 epic 🦠

🦠 and a lot more videogames and otomes (like adwd or TKATB)🦠

Minors please DNI this blog is not exactly family friendly

[imightbeapulsar]

I've been thinking about a Reverse fallen devotion AU (where Clive lives and MC ends up dying) and at on point one of my friends pointed out how much I dragged Clive in this AU...ANYWAYS!

In the AU reverse,since MC died,Clive had basically GET DRAGGED outside and into a job by both Julian and my goat Dariel (who felt pity for Clive even if they really didn't hanged out) and now Clive started working at the memoria with him,so basically a 6'2 most depressed, anxious,paranoid and emotionally drained looking guy just works there like the love of their life wasn't literally ran over 2 years ago...anyway, what do you think about it? How would YOUR Mc be after getting 'back' to 'haunt' the poor reverse Clive??

Thank u for the ask!! Lemme hug reverse AU Clive once TT Kudos to Dariel the goat for saving everyone btw

I might have mistakes since English is not my first language, and I wrote so long oh god..

CW mental health issues, su*cidal thoughts, sensitive

Ellis is already passive suicidal and has a background of sh, so when he dies I'm not sure if his will to come back would be as much as Clive's. But he has an unhealthy attachment to Clive too (he just mask it too much because he finds it disgusting and embarrassing, thinks he doesn't have any rights to feel like this and internalized homophobia** is not helping the situation) also hes already an over responsible guy as an oldest and parentified child,, so it just adds it up. In a situation like Clive being in danger, he would probably come back(￣∇￣)

(((I'm not sure how the rumor that broke our relationship works in reverse AU I'd like it if u enlighten me here (*´∀`) But I'm gonna assume it is still the same and we were angry at Clive and ignoring him but Clive was in danger and we died trying to reach him? I don't know if we can reverse this cuz Clive ghosting us feels so out of character┐(ﾟ～ﾟ)┌)))

Ellis would make sure that Clive is in a safe place first, since that was the reason of his resurrection. After that, however, he wouldn't face him. He is not very confrontational in situations like this. When someone precious to them hurts or betrays them, they tend to keep their anger and sadness bottled up inside and in the end they either forgive them/brush it off or move away from the relationship when it becomes the last straw.

So they wouldn't haunt Clive or try to get revenge. They would just ignore him. But emotions would eat them inside, they would waver alot and might end up in Clive's dreams sometimes lol Oh and they definitely would go after the ones who hurted Clive that day. Considering that resurrection corrupts the balance of emotions, they wouldn't torture them like Clive did but k*ll them. Even before dying, they already believed that certain actions could warrant the death penalty. So in that situation, moral obligations wouldn't be enough to stop them from doing it themself.

I remember reading a post of Row saying Clive wouldn't have a reason to live if MC dies. If that happens, Ellis's concern would mix with his anger, and as they bottling for too long they would go to Clive's house and lash out to him without thinking his reasoning(・・;) but I guess even this would make Clive feel much better since their long lost love returned to them.. after they get their head together and learning the truth Ellis would feel like a piece of s for sure, as they should (　｀ー´)

**it's towards himself, not other people. I might talk about this later maybe

[kavin0there]

I LOVE HOW YOUR MC IS WRITTEN SO INDEFINITELY HAD TO DESCRIBE MORE AND BETTER HOW REVERSE CLIVE IS!!

CW: mental health issues,sensitive topics,implied self harm,implied suicide attempt,and more innapropiate things.

Okay, first of all,what is reverse Clive? In this AU even if Clive was perfectly still between dyonisian and Apollonian after MC's death,instead of having to 'balance' this sides,he goes from one side or the other in mood swings that are clearly related to his depression.

Due to MC's death,Clive didn't came out of his room for almost weeks,he convinced himself that MC died hating him (because he never found out that mc learned the truth),which brought him into a very much spiraling depression and after a REALLY DANGEROUS experience with loose pills he found around, the episode had to be forced to stop by Julian himself because he couldn't stand to see his own son slowly dying from grief,and even if at first after being pulled out of his bedroom he seemed awfully quiet and tired,he was convinced by Julian to work on the Memoria, position he got better because Dariel (the goat) worked there and told the manager how difficult Clive had it.

While working there he seems almost like a shy ghost,works at the back because the manager told him he's not great with people,which is true the only person he was outgoing with was MC ,and they weren't there anymore,and he didn't even tried to be as intimidating as he used to,he just looked really depressed and almost like a zombie,like a kicked dog after losing his owner,everytime he sees a person awfully similar to MC he goes to the back of the cafe and sobs,he hates that Dariel tries to comfort him,but he admits he doesn't have anyone else except Julian and Dariel to go cry about it,after all literally everyone in his school still thinks he's an asshole.

When he goes back home,he never turnes on the lights,he stays in the dark listing to music or maybe even drawing mc, because one of his biggest fears is forgetting how they looked like,which is why,in a VERY DYONISIAN act of madness,he used a room he had to create something similar to an altar to mc, drawings covering the walls, sculptures,even pictures of them everywhere where the eye can see,he keeps that room better than his own bedroom,that is completely messy and very much shows how his lifestyle drastically changed after losing his soulmate,he misses them. He misses them so much. He still cries every night,and he feels so guilty when he does things he regrets after the fleeting memories that bring him pleasure of MC's touch fades away,but he can't control himself specially since all he can think is them.

MORE FACTS ABOUT REVERSE CLIVE!!

he's shorter than normal Clive since he stopped eating for a while and left the gym for at least a year.

Instead of having angel fangs,this Clive has snake fangs as piercings.

He doesn't wants to admit that Dariel is his friend yet,but it's more of "dog that lost an owner refuses to be seen vulnerable around a new person" type of relationship,than actually dislike.

He's still a cry baby,has eyebags and the rim of his eyes are always slightly puffy from crying, he's also really awkward around people who try to talk to him,no wonder he got moved to the back of the memoria

Likes sleeping a lot because most of his dreams are about MC anyways,and extending that,this Clive is more closet-pervert that he admits to be,he trembles and whimpers into his pillow,even sobbing pathetically after his "self-pleasuring" sessions some nights,he later feels like the worst person ever for jacking off to his dead soulmate.

[imightbeapulsar]

Creepypasta Clive

He can haunt me all he wants(゜゜)(。。)(゜゜)

Inspired by the phainon art of @/kannbergri on twitter

[thesleeplezzz]

Yanderes Art WIPS

Since a few weeks, i been feeling like my style it wasn't enough, i'm sure many of you has been felt like that, so i decide to watch Oil Paint tutorials and aplly that in my style, i still felt a like scare to ruin any ideas i have but thats about art... fail, learn and do it again

[imightbeapulsar]

Old unfinished guilty pieces from his birthday. I still think about the birthday art i never did, sometimes (..)

[kavin0there]

Love you people

[thesleeplezzz]

This night I wanted to try a new render style, so I draw Puppy Clive <3

[reffsleepy]

he looks kinda silly, but oh well

[imightbeapulsar]

We are in the middle of something Julian

Thank you for the idea @kavin0there :D

[reffsleepy]

gettin back into this vn ( ´ ꒳ ` )

i'll try coloring this in digital too

[imightbeapulsar]

TODAYS CLIVE'S BIRTHDAY YIPPEEE!!

I KNOWWW (*^o^)／＼(^-^*) I was looking forward to this day cuz its my first time since I known him!! and I'm missing it cuz of my exams (T^T) I wanna draw him so much I will make it up when I have time...

[imightbeapulsar]

I'm back! With little scribbles I did. I wasn't sure about sharing but then I said why not. Cuz why not?♪～(´ε｀ )

[thesleeplezzz]

Re-playing Fallen Devotion. I just love him, Smoll Clive :3

[kavin0there]

It's finally time. Here's MY personal collection of Fallen Devotion memes (all of them are about Clive tbh) PART 1.

[kavin0there]

MY FALLEN DEVOTION POSTER ARRIVED🗣️🗣️ (+ the necklace I bought a year ago just to make a reference of Clive)

[imightbeapulsar]

apollonian / dionysian

.+*｡･He has a special page in my mindbook+*.｡ﾟ

I like reading about different perspectives and I love @fallendev0tionvn s way of handling Nietzsche's philosophy(人´∀`)♪

[kavin0there]

A compilation of all the shitpost I did for "don't eat the cashier" Part 1. Please play the game it's awsome. I swear.