Broken in 3 ways

Intention is one of the most powerful forces there is. What you mean when you do a thing will always determine the outcome. The law creates the world.

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

It was only when Kaleb removed their hand that he realized it was even there in the first place.  “I only ever killed her,” he whispered.  “I saved so many people, but… you put it best, my powers weren’t my own.  They… they derailed everything.”  Finally, he glanced over at them.  “You seem pretty human to me,” he mused.  “I’m sorry you had to… go through what you did.  For what it’s worth, you seem to be doing okay with me?”

“And you didnt mean to. And she was sick and you couldnt help her. You saved her too.... just in a different way. Sometimes death is saving someone.” They replied a bit louder, tilting their head to the side. “You are blind then.” Shrugging, Kaleb let out a small sigh as the other apologized. “It can’t change. What happened and why it happened. Nothing changes it or makes it better or makes it easier so there is no reason to apologize for it. Im good following the motions. I read enough... thought enough... talked to myself enough when I wasn’t drugged out of my mind but im not good at it.”

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

A low and bitter laugh escaped Cody at the words that the other spoke. “They locked me away,” he explained.  “They used me for my powers, telling me I was doing the right thing when they were simply exploiting me for money.”  He still didn’t look at Kaleb.  “She used me; her father abused my powers.  Deep down…” His voice trailed off.  “I wish it had been him and not her.”

Nodding, Kaleb knew this all too well. “He locked me away too.” Their voice small as they withdrew their hand. “It could eventually still be him.” They knew it probably wasnt what the oher wanted to hear but it would have sounded comforting to them. “Its not nice... is it? Not knowing where what you did and what you were made to do starts and ends. Do you... do you ever wonder if you will ever feel like your powers are your own? Sorry... again you dont have to answer. I dont really know how to human... a lot. Since I was like 14 or so I only ever really saw him. He didnt really make conversation... just made orders.” 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

Cody nodded silently and remained silent for a few long moments after Kaleb’s question.  His eyes closed and he took another long drink from his bottle of beer, finishing it.  He set it down next to him.  “My fiancee…” he finally exhaled.  “She was sick… beyond what I could heal, I’m sure.  And it all happened so fast.  One moment she was there, then she was gone.”  His voice was empty.  “Then I… I thought I was dead too, but here I am.”

He glanced over at Kaleb, but said nothing.

“Oh..” Kaleb mumbled softly looking down at their feet as they took in what the other had said. “Oh well... then you helped her. Sometimes.... sometimes we do things that are hard to help other people and it sounds like you helped her. If she was sick... if she was dying already or in pain or.....” Kaleb shifted in their seat and reached out, placing their hand softly on the others arm. “Thats not a bad thing, you know that right? You didnt do bad.” 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

Cody looked away from Kaleb as he spoke.  He couldn’t imagine what they went through, and he didn’t want to imagine it.  He had his own nightmares from life in captivity.  “Relief,” was the first word that came to mind.  “Fear.  Disgust.  Sadness.  Even though it was an accident, I think that… deep down I wanted it to happen.  What does that say about me?” His voice was quiet and distant.

Listening to the others answer, Kaleb nodded quickly wondering if they would have felt relief to kill their adopted parent. “That it was something that you needed to have happen.” They mumbled, letting out a small sigh. “Who was it? You dont have to tell me.... if you dont want to. I just... I havent ever talked to anyone about what happened to me.” 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

Cody watched Kaleb for a few moments before tentatively reaching out to place a comforting hand on their shoulder.  However, he awkwardly stopped short and pulled his hand back.  He knew what it was like to have people invade personal space and honestly didn’t want to do that to Kaleb.

“Because it takes… when you… it’s not an easy thing to explain.”

Glad when the other didnt touch them, Kaleb nodded slowly. “I watched... I told people to do horrible things. To kill other people, to kill themselves and I watched every time. And they were good people and... and he isn’t and I couldn’t. And so what does that say about me?” Pausing, Kaleb cocked their head to the side. “What did it feel like when you killed someone?” 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

Exhaling slowly, Cody listened to them speak, not interrupting, just allowing them to keep going until they found a proper stopping point.  “You’re right,” he replied slowly.  He was slowly beginning to piece things together and honestly felt bad for the person before him.  “That means that you’re not as bad as you think you are.  I mean, I don’t know you’re story.  I don’t want to pry.  But I know what it takes to kill someone… even accidentally and it… it sucks.”

Kaleb moved to lean forward, bringing themselves closer to the other. “People not prying is half my story.” They mumbled before rolling their eyes. “I know what it takes to... I mean, I never actually did it but I convinced people to do it. I pulled the trigger, I just never held the gun. And then he was there and... and I wanted to so badly. And I didnt want to tell him to... to convince him to. I wanted to do it and I couldnt and I dont know why because I still want to.” 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

Cody offered them another gentle smile.  “Some people are like that,” he replied carefully. “But I’ve come to learn that there are more good people in the world than bad.  At least from my experience.”

He took another drink of his beer.  “I hear ya there. Not having control over yourself or anything is one of the worst feelings in the world.  Having to do something you don’t want to do just to stay alive… that’s horrible.”  He glanced away from Kaleb.  “But let me tell you, this place… it’s the best.  I wouldn’t say that if I didn’t mean it.”

Shifting a bit, they dropped their hands as they got more comfortable. “What if Im one of the bad ones though. Like... I did a lot of bad things and I dont really feel bad about them. Not how I should feel. Not how a normal person would feel.” 

Letting out a small pained laugh, Kaleb shrugged slowly. “It doesnt make it better though, does it? Doing things just to stay alive. Doing horrible fucked up things just to live. Even if you have to. No one has to do anything besides when... besides when I made them. Im always going to be a risk and at risk of being a weapon. I didnt kill him... like I planned to um and I wanted to but... but I couldnt.” Scoffing, Kaleb brought their arms back up and around them. “People say things they dont mean all the time.” 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

Cody read their body language and took a step away.  “Sorry,” he mused quietly, taking the change of subject.  “Because you have to be 21 to get the beer.  Some people are just cruel and want to see other people get drunk and do things that they’ll regret later.”

As Kaleb continued, a look of realization hit him.  “Don’t apologize, kid,” he replied evenly.  “Sound like you were dealt a bad hand.  But you’re here now, right?  That’s a step in the right direction.”  Cody could read their body language and wished he could do something to help them relax.  

As the other stepped back, Kaleb gave a small smile. “Its okay. Its... okay.” They didnt really know what to say besides the obvious. Letting out a small laugh at people being cruel, Kaleb nodded. “A lot of people are cruel and they want to see a lot more than people doing things they regret. Like you are on show. A puppet.... plaything.” 

Looking back up at the other, Kaleb shook their head. “Is it? I traded one cage for another. I...” They paused for a moment biting their bottom lip as they thought over what they wanted to say. “I dont want my powers. I know im supposed to be learning how to control them but I dont want to. I dont want to be controlled. That line is terribly thin. Being in control and being controlled. ” 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

Cody slowly moved a little closer  to Kaleb.  “It does, but that’s the price that some people are willing to pay to have a good time.”  His smile faded a bit when they mentioned not wanting to forget any more, but Cody didn’t push the issue.  

“It’s spiked punch.  It’s probably cheap vodka that would give you the worst hangover of your life,” he offered.  “And 23?  I don’t know if I believe that,” he said with a gentle tease.

Leaning back a bit as the other moved closer, Kaleb wrapped their arms around themself going a bit more on the defensive. Without having access to their powers, they instantly felt weak though they figured the other didnt mean any harm. Old habits were definitely proving to die hard. 

“Why would anyone spike it if they are offering beer?” Kaleb mumbled looking back down at their empty glass. “I just look young. I know that.... it makes me less intimidating. He liked that. People didnt think I could do anything when they saw me and uh.... sorry.” 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

Cody smiled gently at Kaleb.  “A lot of people do, actually,” he explained, chuckling as they dumped the rest of their drink on the ground.  “They also like the way that it makes them feel.  It helps to, I guess, strip away the insecurities and such.  Makes them feel better.”

He shrugged as he took a sip of his beer.  “And not all of it tastes bad.  I’d offer you to try the beer, but you don’t really look old enough to drink.”

Kaleb looked back down at the now empty glass not understanding. “But doesnt alcohol also make you act weird and say things you shouldnt and forget. I wouldn’t want to forget any more.” Their voice soft as they looked back up at the other.

“Well that one tasted like chemicals so..’ As age was brought up, Kaleb bent down to place the cup on the ground beside their feet. “I am 23.... I think. Wait yeah. 23. Birthdays werent a huge thing for me.” 

[kaykorvick]

oliver-lincolns‌:

Oliver shook his head. “I’d rather you keep your freaky kink shit to yourself. I’m not going to tell you again, freak. Move before I make you regret your existence more than you already do.”

Kaleb rolled their eyes glancing back up at the other for a moment. “Does that work? Bullying people into doing what you want?” Shrugging, not really caring for the answer, they went back to their book and didnt move. 

[kaykorvick]

heartfelt-cody‌:

At events like these, Cody often felt like the chaperone rather than an actual attendee.  He felt far too old for this, but showed up anyways due to the promise of free booze and the fact that he’d never be able to live with himself if someone got hurt.  

In a way, he was like the paramedics on scene at a raucous concert: a safety precaution.  “Hey, you uh- might want to slow down a little,” he said gently with a small smile on his features.  “Get too drunk and it turns into a not so fun party.”

Kaleb wasn’t entirely sure why they had even came out, besides the fact that they had never been to a bonfire being slightly appealing. Still, here they were nestled just close enough to the fire to not be cold nursing a drink that tasted disgustingly of chemicals.  “Hmmm.” Looking up slowly at the guy speaking, they looked back down at their drink. “What?” They wrinkled their nose before pouring out the rest of the drink. “That explains the disgusting taste. Do people actually enjoy that?” 

[kaykorvick]

oliver-lincolns‌:

“Move. You’re in my space. I’m not going to fuck around here.” Oliver barked his orders, his face twitching with anger. He was always hot-headed, more inclined to throw fists first and never both asking questions.

Kaleb looked up from their book at the other before back down. They had gotten so used to being able to read freely now that they rarely didn’t have a book on them at all times. “You should consider yourself lucky that I am in the control division or I’d have you cleaning my boots with your tongue right now. Now shoo, im reading.” 

[kaykorvick]

rene-manchester‌:

“Oh,” Rene said. His eye flickered to across their uniform. Control division. “That’s true.” Typically, Rene only said things that he deemed to be absolutely true. Unless, of course, he was employing his ‘seem normal’ tactics. Like just then. Most people didn’t like silence. Rene did. But most people didn’t. So what he had nothing to say, he just said whatever his mind happened upon. “Sorry.” 

Nodding slowly, Kays eyes went back to their book. They had grown used to a lot of silence growing up... at least from the times they could remember being present. It didnt quite mean they enjoyed it, especially on bad days when they remembered all the things they had done. Looking back up, Kay cocked their head to the side. “Hmm... why are you apologizing? You can’t change what I have experienced if you are apologizing for the past or take back anything you have done so far if you are apologizing for yourself.” 

[kaykorvick]

teagang‌:

“Huh. That makes a change.” Teagan wasn’t used to people not knowing. “I tried, but I had too many people lying against me. It’s a… complicated story.” Shrugging her shoulders, “I don’t want to be a terrible person.”

“Didn’t get to really see much growing up.” Kaleb explained easily. “The right people will want to hear it though.” They knew it was a bit hypocritical talking about telling your story when they refused to talk about their own. “Then dont be. Dont do terrible things.” 

[kaykorvick]

teagang‌:

“Seriously?” Teagan arched an eyebrow. She wasn’t used to people not knowing who she was. Due to her well known parentage, her face was plastered all over the news when she was arrested. “Uh, a lot of people judge me on an incident they know nothing about. Wow. That’s comforting,” Teagan rolled her eyes, “I don’t want to be a terrible person, all I wanted was to help people.”

“Um yes?” Kaleb mumbled, looking her over before back down at their plate. They hadn’t really had access to the news growing up, not like she would know. “Then tell them what happened. I don’t really understand the problem.” If it was just people misunderstanding, surely talking would help. “You can want to help people and still be a terrible person. Terrible people sometimes do good things.” 

[kaykorvick]

rene-manchester‌:

Rene watched the other closely–well…as close as one could without actually looking at the person. He’d always found it hard to make eye contact, so he learned to look just above the head, to the ear, or at the chin or chest area. “As safe as anywhere, I suppose.”

Moving to open their book once more, Kaleb sat back to where they had been reading wanting nothing more than to be able to have their mind preoccupied once more. Flinching as the boy spoke, Kaleb looked back up at him. “No...” They supplied at first, bringing their attention back to their book. “Not as safe as anywhere.”