@kell-horreur - Tumblr Blog

nobody likes my "ET is a faith fantasy about a granny from the old country who shows up unexpectedly to live with her family and teaches a 2nd generation empty-souled american suburban kid how to love with his heart" take but it's the truest thing i've ever said

giving someone the same anime recommendation again, like sorry you need do to this to unlock more of my dialogue tree

Excited to play as Mrs Kratos in 2028. Though I don’t actually like GoW gameplay that much.

My old friend was very excited to tell me about this game. This is the liar/thief friend. Ironically w most people I know I came out like “I’m trans btw haha don’t worry not asking you to change anything haha ha it’s nothing really” (then later sob sob why don’t they care). With this friend I am more open about it bc honestly I don’t care if he fucks off. It’s probably not a good dynamic.

thinking what's going on with maga is that rabid reactionaryism has become secular. or rather, that tribal white nationalism used to be mostly a christian thing because they are steeped in tribalist alienated must-make-babies thoughts 24-7, but a bigger mass of mostly secular people have "woken up" to a hyper reactionary white nationalist tribal identity, ie become nazis.

ok this is a long way around to saying theyre nazis, but the important part is that while religions do create little nazi-brained people, they ALSO they teach that the id must be constrained, and that appearances must be kept up, the boat should not be rocked, and there is goodness to be had to dilute the evil.

but maga types don't have any of that, no structural superego, not even a secular one because they are so anti-intellectual. they are pure id, the whole movement is about unleashing the id, which is actually a good way to influence politics.

this is all my response to the "interracial cuck porn" article which i think is insightful but ass backwards, kind of sloppy thinking that porn is causative, and doesn't really answer q's like "how is this happening?" and "why is this happening now?"

as much as i hate AI, i think also grew to hate the kind of "young article-writer" voice, with their generally inexperienced point of view, and the palpable feeling of careerism, of just being the same 24 year old striver voice over and over and over and over.

back on my bullshit which in this case is meowing to joy divs isolation

i like to read people's OSR D&D house rules.

super nathequest is my current favorite. i find it very funny but it might be brain damage from reading so many house rules filled with so much tedium and/or cute little solutions to things that don't matter. nathequest is not satire it's 100% serious, concise, & functional. (the guy who makes it, NBateman is a leading light on the OSR discord; he's known for running very great combats; his blog is great stuff.)

I also just don’t have anything to say about beloved. It’s like 40 years old and I am still running woke 1.7 on an instance. I already know trauma continues on into the future. The book is very well written and illustrates a horrible infantilization of the mind wrought by slavery. I encountered it too late. Also I think American Fiction the movie is a bookend, about the hypocrisy of milking like the illiterate black systemic victim for literary cred. Though I think the movie is conservative brained ultimately.

A perhaps surprising thing about my nerdy Iowan friend book club is that few of them have read any lovecraft and they have no taste for any kind of cosmic horror. They disdain almost all pop nerd stuff. They like Andy weir books. They like trash when it’s hard sci-fi.

We just read beloved by Toni Morrison. I didn’t finish it. They liked it but kept fussing over what really happened, if the ghost is real. It was well written enough to carry them past that hangup, but I just felt so tired. Tbf I feel weird tired depressed irritable a lot lately. Maybe I just resent not connecting with these guys who are so stiff and arrogant about so much. I want friends who are fun. I want them to care about me too. But I don’t get to have friends that care about me because I’m a black hole of neediness I can’t handle one drop.

saw a woman in a reed sweatshirt at the beach today, and almost called out "sing, o muse, of the rage of achilles!" ,, hum101 is the iliad everyone has to take it.......

#where my reedies at #in my mind she is impressed and says something and i say #im a dropout and i smile andf walk away

did no one do "ideal t4t couple" for the moonrise kingdom kids

the trans comic with the Roman helmet kid is really well done and powerful, but also it’s very off putting to me that it’s quite fictional.

this is a general queasiness I have about writing in general, I do go around saying things like fundamentally a writer is a liar to help my little pea brain keep perspective

"the writer is really using their full..."

(wrussy? no i can to better. authussy? no be real come on brain; wait maybe bussy like book-pussy no that's the finished object okay so they write with a pen)

"..pussy FUCK"

reading zone of interest and laughed at a horny SS guy's mania for fucking other nazis' zaftig nazi tradwives

I had hoiked up and unfurled many a three-ply dirndl, I had eased off many a pair of furry bloomers, I had tossed over my shoulder many a hobnailed clog.

having fun with retheming the "star trek: captain's chair" game into a fantasy thing where wizards vie for control of magical relics.

apparently klingons->undead. also, vulcans->elves, romulans->witches and so forth. not really sure what to retheme picard as, probably the generic old guy wizard. obviously a WIP and i don't know how much further i will take it.

mostly i just want to show off how my version of the card is 10 times more readable at the same size and rough information density.

i like using html/js/css for layout, there's a million advantages. this card is just this:

i need to get out of the doom bubble, i can't live with this much futile hopelessness even if it does feel Objectively Correct.

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