sanghyuk gently twists the doorknob -- jaehwan’s surely fallen asleep already, sanghyuk had texted him earlier, told jaehwan about the extra work he’d have to do, not to stay up for him -- and when sanghyuk enters the room quietly, the sight before him has his mouth going dry. sure enough, jaehwan’s already fallen asleep, back view facing sanghyuk -- but all he has on is a pink sweater (the oversized one, the one sanghyuk’s used to seeing, definitely one of jaehwan’s favourite clothing items), and nothing else.
breath hitching, sanghyuk puts his work bag aside and loosens his tie, feet padding softly towards the king-sized bed. on closer look, jaehwan’s face is set in a permanent sleeping pout (how adorable), knees are curled up to his chest, his hands completely buried in soft, excess pink material. sanghyuk gently settles down on the bed, and his gaze falls onto jaehwan’s lower back -- pink sweater hiked up around the pretty dip, exposed pale skin looking soft, and -- trailing further down, sanghyuk catches the baby pink protrusion between the full cheeks of jaehwan’s ass, heart catching in his chest -- jaehwan had been waiting, for sure.
‘jaehwan,’ sanghyuk tries, lip bitten as he reaches out, touches the rubber plug, just lightly shifting it -- jaehwan simply makes a small sound in his sleep, and visibly clenches around the plug. sanghyuk’s head spins. ‘baby,’ sanghyuk drawls, voice low, louder this time. sanghyuk firmly grips onto the base of the pink plug and presses in gently, just as he leans over jaehwan to press a kiss onto those pouted lips -- jaehwan reacts more this time, lips parting in a pretty gasp beneath sanghyuk’s, pretty lashes fluttering before those sleepy eyes blink open, clearly dazed, but aroused. jaehwan blinks slowly as he tries to adjust to the light, and sanghyuk smiles, runs his hands up underneath the sweater, fingers roaming across the ridges of jaehwan’s pretty ribs, thumbs rubbing gently circles into jaehwan’s tiny pebbled nipples.
‘sanghyuk,’ jaehwan tries to say, still dazed with sleep, but then sanghyuk gently fucks the toy in again, and cuts jaehwan off with a cute, pitched whine. god, sanghyuk’s so in love.
‘have you been waiting, jaehwanah?’
‘i- i meant for this to be a surprise,’ jaehwan starts, voice trembling just slightly, ‘but i- ah, i must’ve fallen asleep while waiting, i’m so sorry.’ jaehwan sounds so genuinely apologetic it’s almost as if he’s about to tear up, and sanghyuk shushes him with a gentle kiss, hands cradling jaehwan’s tiny heated face.
he’s a lucky man.
‘you’re so good for me, jaehwanah, you know that?’ sanghyuk pulls away, and there’s the prettiest coral flush high up on jaehwan’s cheeks as he spreads his bare legs to accommodate sanghyuk in between. ‘so good,’ sanghyuk emphasises, gaze fixed between jaehwan’s soft cheeks as he gently twists the pink plug out -- jaehwan lets out a loud whimper at that, hand flying to his face in embarrassment, and sanghyuk groans at how shiny lube trickles out immediately, the wrinkles of jaehwan’s hole glistening prettily with slick and pinkened with arousal, clenched into the prettiest pucker. sanghyuk’s so, so lucky.
‘please,’ jaehwan hooks his arms under his knees, pulls his thighs apart and flush to his chest to expose his hole -- sanghyuk groans, jaehwan is so, so -- ‘i’m so ready, please,’ jaehwan says, needy and soft, barely a whisper, eyes lidded and glazed over with arousal and sanghyuk wastes no time in getting his achingly hard cock out of his pants, presses the leaking head to jaehwan’s wet hole hurriedly.
‘baby boy,’ sanghyuk lets out a strangled gasp the moment he pushes into jaehwan fully. the excessive lube that jaehwan had prepared himself with earlier makes the slide in so easy, effortless, and they’ve done this countless times before but it’s so much, all the time -- jaehwan’s body clamped around his cock, tight and incredibly hot, so wet inside -- and when sanghyuk looks down jaehwan’s pretty eyes are clenched shut in pleasure, fringe matted with sweat across his forehead, the flush on his pretty cheeks deepened in hue, lips parted around the softest noises.
‘you feel so good,’ sanghyuk says and spreads jaehwan’s pliant thighs further apart, his own cheeks burning, knows what his baby wants to hear -- and with that jaehwan’s ass clenches up around sanghyuk, his grip on sanghyuk’s biceps tightening through the thin material of his sweater paws -- he’s clearly loving the praise, always eager to please, to know how good he’s doing--
‘my baby boy,’ sanghyuk groans and leans in, still fucking into a whiny jaehwan, the smaller writhing boy folded up beneath sanghyuk’s strong, large frame -- presses loving, fleeting kisses across the heated skin of jaehwan’s small flushed face, across his hairline, to his cheeks and the tips of his ears, down his jaw, kisses his soft gasping mouth and down the length of his neck. he can feel jaehwan’s cock pressed hard against his stomach, slick precome seeping through the material of sanghyuk’s dress shirt.
‘sanghyuk,’ jaehwan mewls, just as sanghyuk bites down gently into the side of jaehwan’s neck, where he knows his boy’s most sensitive -- jaehwan sobs and arches up into sanghyuk, thighs trembling around sanghyuk’s hips, nails biting harder into sanghyuk’s biceps, ass tightening incredibly around sanghyuk’s cock, unstoppable little ‘ahs’ escaping his pretty mouth as sanghyuk grazes his teeth across sensitive skin, applies just the right amount of pleasure, suckles hard enough to leave a scattering of deep pink marks along the way.
‘i’m coming, i’m,’ jaehwan whimpers, hooded gaze meeting sanghyuk’s, glistening lips trembling, ‘can i come, sanghyuk, can i please,’ -- sanghyuk’s hands return to jaehwan’s waist immediately, fingers pressing hard into the soft flesh as he quickens his pace and angles his thrusts into jaehwan’s tight body just so, right against his little sweet spot -- ‘come for me,’ sanghyuk growls, and then jaehwan’s shaking as he comes apart, completely untouched, back arched perfectly and the sweetest cry of sanghyuk’s name on his lips as his cock spills a pretty white splatter-stain across his favourite pink sweater.
‘was it good?’ sanghyuk smiles at the sated look on jaehwan’s sleepy face -- jaehwan nods quickly, fluffy hair bouncing, cheeks still tinted a pretty pink. sanghyuk’s heart fills once again with an immense love for his baby boy -- keeps his hold on jaehwan’s waist and gently moves them about so jaehwan’s settled comfortably in his lap (he fits so well, small and perfect in sanghyuk’s lap), sanghyuk’s back against the bedframe, hard cock still buried in his sweet boy.
‘can you ride me?’ sanghyuk asks, and it’s a genuine question because sanghyuk’s ready to do the work if jaehwan’s too worn out from the fucking -- but jaehwan nods yes immediately, always, always wanting to be good for sanghyuk -- sweater paws placed on the hard muscle of sanghyuk’s broad chest. jaehwan slowly rises from sanghyuk’s lap, then sinks down slowly, repeats the action over and over, the wet sounds of his ass smacking against sanghyuk’s skin increasing in volume as his tiny face reddens once again with embarrassment -- he’s also clearly overstimulated from just moments ago but still tries his best, nonetheless, expressions sinful and helpless gasps of sanghyuk’s name escaping his kiss-swollen mouth.
jaehwan’s being so good for him, and sanghyuk’s cock hardens inside of jaehwan as he runs his palms up and down the length of jaehwan’s bare thighs, reverently, cups jaehwan’s warm cheek in his hand. the pink sweater is so oversized it slips off the plane of jaehwan’s narrow shoulders easily with each bounce -- sanghyuk groans as his gaze falls onto the smattering of pink marks all over jaehwan’s exposed collarbones and shoulders, fingers stretching out to press gently into the marks just to hear jaehwan whimper and tremble prettily in his lap. soon, jaehwan’s eyes start to fill up with sparkly tears, perhaps from the overstimulation, his movements also getting slower and more sluggish, the muscles in his skinny thighs worn out from the riding. at this, sanghyuk takes over, and jaehwan whimpers, slumped against sanghyuk’s chest as the bigger man grips tight at his hips and thrusts up into his fucked out, pliant ass. jaehwan sobs against sanghyuk’s chest when sanghyuk finally comes, a wave of heat gushing into jaehwan’s twitching, oversensitized body. jaehwan also comes a second time, this time a weak dribble of come staining sanghyuk’s shirt.
(they stay like this, for a while -- jaehwan in sanghyuk’s lap, both of them silently enjoying the sweet intimacy, exchanging soft smiles and kisses and genuine whispers of ‘i love you’ -- until it’s finally time to clean up, and sanghyuk spoils a sleepy jaehwan with a hot bath)
where jaehwan is sick, and sanghyuk takes care of him
‘s-sanghyuk?’
sanghyuk startles when jaehwan finally stirs from his sleep -- his voice is so hoarse, barely audible; eyes half-lidded with fatigue and usually pink lips now a deathly pale. this sight, it hurts sanghyuk -- he reaches out to gently rest his palm against jaehwan’s forehead, briefly checking his temperature. his skin burns hot against the cool skin of sanghyuk’s palm. sanghyuk’s hand must feel cold, too, as jaehwan makes a noise, like a hurt whine, and recoils slightly from the touch.
‘you’re finally awake, hyung.’
‘w-what’s going on?’ what time is it?’
‘it’s nearly three in the afternoon.’
‘huh?’ jaehwan croaks, and the sound of his voice makes sanghyuk’s heart ache badly.
‘you’re running a high fever, hyung.’ sanghyuk takes jaehwan’s hand in his own, jaehwan’s fingers are cold and clammy in his hold, weak and lacking life. ‘the others,’ sanghyuk starts, knowing all too well what jaehwan’s main concern is. it’s always work, work, schedules, before health, and rest. ‘the others have gone to the event without us. hakyeon-hyung let me stay to keep watch over you.’
‘oh no,’ jaehwan starts, wrinkles appearing on his forehead, brows furrowed with worry. sanghyuk wants to shush jaehwan, please stop talking, please rest your voice -- he does this by cradling jaehwan’s face, soft and hot against his palm, thumb soothing circles into his fever-flushed cheeks. ‘please don’t worry, hyung. the event will go as scheduled.’
‘but it’s an important--‘
‘hyung, please stop’ sanghyuk cuts in, on the bare edge of irritation, because jaehwan needs to stop worrying over things less important than his very own wellbeing, but the sight of hot tears forming in the corners of those large, shadow-rimmed eyes are enough to make sanghyuk’s heart soften. jaehwan gets even more sensitive when he’s sick, and sanghyuk knows this all too well. sanghyuk reaches forward to wipe the tears away, carefully, before taking both jaehwan’s hands in his own ones, grasping them tightly.
‘please, hyung. we’ve discussed this before,’ sanghyuk sighs as jaehwan sniffles. ‘you’ve been working yourself too hard recently, hyung. on top of comeback schedules, you’ve got more than one musical going on for you, and you’re getting barely two hours’ of sleep daily? how can you not expect to fall so sick?’ sanghyuk hears his voice starting to waver with emotion, and wills the sadness away, biting his lip. jaehwan’s pale mouth shivers softly, before his lips part in an attempt to speak.
‘i know, hyung, i know you mean well for us. because those schedules mean more public attention, more popularity for our group.’ sanghyuk tightens his hold on jaehwan’s hands, unknowingly. ‘but this is done at the expense of your health, hyung. us members, we could do without the extra fame, but we will never do without hyung.’ sanghyuk takes in a deep breath, and fights the sour twinge in his nose. ‘we love you so dearly, hyung, you know that? please, give yourself more care.’
with that, sanghyuk pauses, releasing a long sigh. jaehwan’s eyes are getting watery again.
‘i-i’ll try, sanghyuk… i’ll try’
yes. trying is enough. better than never at all.
sanghyuk flashes a weak smile, before releasing jaehwan’s hands and getting up. his movements are stopped when jaehwan grabs at his wrist, grip weak but insistent. sanghyuk turns back to look at jaehwan, and he’s tearing up again, oh so sensitive.
‘please,’ jaehwan starts, two hands clutching at sanghyuk’s arm now, hot fingers pressing into sanghyuk’s wrist. ‘w-where are you going? please don’t leave me, sanghyuk’
‘not going anywhere,’ sanghyuk sits back down, cards his fingers through jaehwan’s slightly sweat damp hair. he’ll have to wash up soon. ‘it’s past lunch time and you need to eat, hyung, you’re too weak. i’ll be back soon, alright? just rest while i prepare some food, and some pills.’
--
when sanghyuk gets back, jaehwan’s sleeping soundly again, faint dried tear tracks on his cheeks and temples. sanghyuk gently calls him up and feeds jaehwan some of the congee he’d prepared, mindful of the heat from being freshly cooked, blowing cautiously on each spoonful to cool the food before feeding jaehwan. after finishing, sanghyuk manages to coax jaehwan out of the bed, into take a quick shower to relieve the fever -- gently picks jaehwan into his arms, the elder light and delicate in his arms, sanghyuk feels such a burning need to protect him forever -- and places him in the tub, carefully undresses him and runs jaehwan a short, cold shower. sanghyuk makes sure to immediately wrap a shivering jaehwan up in heated towels, dressing him warmly, before carrying him back into bed.
drowsy, jaehwan falls asleep almost immediately, and sanghyuk releases a deep sigh.
--
‘sanghyuk,’ jaehwan calls out, the moment he wakes up, but no response. worried, jaehwan looks over to his side, and there -- sanghyuk’s fast asleep, head pillowed on his forearms, rested on jaehwan’s bedside table. with lethargic movements, jaehwan slowly picks up the damp towel placed neatly on his forehead, warmed with heat. jaehwan carefully turns to his side, and drops the towel into the mug placed next to sanghyuk’s head, filled with water, and lots of condensing on the sides. sanghyuk must’ve spent the entire time icing jaehwan’s forehead to relieve the fever. jaehwan’s heart aches when he catches sight of the wall clock -- it’s already ten p.m.
‘sanghyukie,’ jaehwan tries again, voice still quite hoarse, but slightly more audible now. jaehwan gently taps on sanghyuk’s shoulder until the younger finally looks up -- hair a mess, dark shadows framing his tired eyes.
‘hyung,’ sanghyuk sits up immediately, ‘when did you wake up?’ sanghyuk asks, and the first thing he does is hurriedly place his palm against jaehwan’s forehead again. it’s still warm, but not as burning hot anymore. ‘wait a bit, hyung.' sanghyuk gets up from his seat, fighting the slight dizzy spell in his head. 'the iced water has gone all warm, i’ll go fetch some more in the freezer.’
‘don’t’ jaehwan grabs at sanghyuk’s wrist again, and the younger turns back, a confused look on his tired face.
‘you look a mess,’ jaehwan whispers, voice trembling, and something tightens in sanghyuk’s chest.
‘have you eaten at all?’ jaehwan asks, and -- met with no reply. ‘you’ve not bathed, too.’ jaehwan continues, eyes sparkling in the dim light. sanghyuk bites his lip -- he’d not even realised that he hadn’t eaten or washed up, the entire day. jaehwan is sick, and he'd been too concerned.
‘please go,’ jaehwan says, ‘go and bathe and get something to eat now.’ jaehwan sits up with some difficulty. ‘i don’t feel as weak now, sanghyuk. i’ll get a change of water myself, and take one more dosage of fever-relief. okay?’
‘but hyung--‘
‘no buts,’ jaehwan slowly gets on to his feet, clutches at sanghyuk for some support at first, but then smiles brightly as he stands up.
‘fancy chiding me about disregarding my health when you do the exact same,’ jaehwan mocks, playful, but his voice trembles. at this, jaehwan leans forward and wraps his arms around sanghyuk tightly, buries his face into sanghyuk’s firm chest. sanghyuk can feel wetness through his shirt where jaehwan’s face is pressed against -- and sanghyuk, now feeling a little choked up as well, slowly wraps an arm around jaehwan’s waist, the other reaching up to cradle the back of jaehwan’s head, gentle fingers stroking at the soft strands of hair lining jaehwan’s nape.
‘it hurts to see you like this as much as it did for you, just now,’ jaehwan pulls away, and sanghyuk smiles as he notes the little colour back in jaehwan’s face -- lips now no longer a ghastly pale but there’s the slightest tinge of pink in there, matching the pretty rose in his full cheeks.
‘now shoo, go get a shower. i’ll get the other members to get some takeaway on the way back.’
But that night, as Sanghyuk tossed and turned in his bed, heart racing weirdly -- it wasn’t how well Jaehwan had sung his song request that Sanghyuk was thinking about -- it was the continuous echoing of the same three words in his mind.
‘Han Sanghyuk’, in crappy, crackly sound quality; in Jaehwan’s sweet, pretty voice.
INSTAGRAM
[hsh0705]: keken_0406 just started a live video. Watch it before it ends!
He’d been waiting for this. Sanghyuk lights up, agile fingers quick to respond as he taps on the notification, immediately directing him to user keken_0406’s livestream. First viewer, as usual. Yes. Sanghyuk smiles as he’s greeted with this familiar screen -- a small room with a dim yellow lighting, a filled bookshelf behind fitting for a cosy backdrop; and in a chair sits the boy named Jaehwan, or so his Instagram biography claims. Sanghyuk thinks it’s such a pretty name. There’s that ever-bright smile on Jaehwan’ face, and a simple guitar slung over his shoulder.
‘Hello!’ Jaehwan starts, eyes curving into little pretty crescents, as a few more viewers slowly stream in. Sanghyuk types out a short ‘hi!’ in the comments, and after some thought, adds a ‘first again!’.
‘Hi,’ Jaehwan chuckles -- it must’ve been his reaction to Sanghyuk’s comment -- the sound of it so pretty, Sanghyuk almost melts in his own chair.
‘Tonight we have… woah! Eighteen viewers!’ Jaehwan exclaims, a genuine, excited lift to his voice. Sanghyuk breaks into a wide smile behind his phone screen.
‘An improvement of three from the last stream, not bad! Hello, fans! And welcome to my very own KeNight!’ Jaehwan waves happily, excitedly, before finally placing pretty fingers over familiar chords, soft strumming noises filling the small room. The sound quality through the livestream isn’t that good, slightly choppy, due to lack of better recording devices, but it’s good. It’s all good.
‘For our new viewers here, I hold my own livestreams biweekly, on every Saturday and Sunday night! Here I’ll just be singing for you guys, either my own favourite songs or your song requests!’ Jaehwan smiles brightly, and Sanghyuk finds himself doing the same.
‘Now let’s have some song requests in, shall we?’
♪ ♫ ♬
[hsh0705]: maroon 5’s sunday morning please?
Sanghyuk’s still clearly remembers his very first attempt at this -- sending in a song request. Despite there being only about ten viewers at that time, his comment had been, sadly, quickly bumped up by a few others. Dejection grew in Sanghyuk’s chest as he watched Jaehwan squint slightly at the screen, reading through the few comments.
‘Ah. This song, one of my favourites!’
Sanghyuk sighed. It surely wasn’t his request, the other commenters were really quick to add their own ones.
‘I think I saw someone comment ‘Sunday morning’ just now, right?’
Oh. Sanghyuk’s heart had skipped a beat, clammy fingers reaching out to quickly type in a response.
[hsh0705]: it was me!
‘Oh? I’ve never seen this username before! Is this your first time streaming?’ A soft smile played on Jaehwan’s full, pretty lips as he started strumming, the tune familiar -- opening chords to ‘Sunday morning’.
[hsh0705]: yeah! just discovered your account a few days ago
Sanghyuk typed, stomach feeling a little fluttery. He thought it was crazy, how Jaehwan knew his viewers and followers so well.
Jaehwan simply smiled, and continued strumming lightly. ‘Nice! Before I begin, may I know your name?’
Sanghyuk had been caught by surprise, not knowing if Jaehwan was being serious, if this was a regular thing in his livestreams, heart racing and thoughts fuzzy. It was his first time streaming after all. The sudden amount of recognition from someone he admired so much, was a little overwhelming.
‘In case you didn’t know,’ Jaehwan kindly explained, as if he’d read Sanghyuk’s mind. ‘Since I only have a few viewers on here I thought it’d be nice to address you guys by your names! Makes things a little more personal and comfortable doesn’t it? But of course it’s okay if you do not wish to--‘
[hsh0705]: han sanghyuk :)
‘Okay,’ Jaehwan giggled softly, probably at how quick Sanghyuk was to give his name.
‘Now, I shall begin. This is dedicated to Han Sanghyuk’
--
Jaehwan sung and played perfectly.
But that night, as Sanghyuk tossed and turned in his bed, heart racing weirdly -- it wasn’t how well Jaehwan had sung his song request that Sanghyuk was thinking about -- it was the continuous echoing of the same three words in his mind.
‘Han Sanghyuk’, in crappy, crackly sound quality; in Jaehwan’s sweet, pretty voice.
♪ ♫ ♬
‘Oh?’ Sanghyuk scrolls back up to that one post which caught his attention. It’s a post by Jaehwan, a picture of what seems to be a chocolate-flavoured drink, placed on a small rounded table -- captioned with a short “iced mocha at my favourite place!”.
Anyone who’s visited that café will immediately recognise that unique, highly aesthetic packaging -- and realisation quickly dawns on Sanghyuk that it is in fact, that little indie café right opposite his dormitory. He’s visited that place maybe once or twice, that’s about it. Sanghyuk isn’t that much of a café-person. But the sudden thought of a shared experience, connection, with Jaehwan, spreads a wave of tingly sensations all over Sanghyuk’s skin.
He clicks on Jaehwan’s username. Jaehwan’s got about twenty more followers now, since a month ago when Sanghyuk had first visited his profile, fell in love, and followed immediately. His biography still reads the same thing: Lee Jaehwan. Jyani. Self-taught guitarist. Self-acclaimed singer. A smile tugs at the corners of Sanghyuk’s lips, before his thumb slips and accidentally taps on the dropdown settings menu for Jaehwan’s profile and--
Sanghyuk stills as his gaze falls on the option, ‘Send a message’ -- it’d never occurred to him that direct messages were always open, free to use. Sanghyuk’s heart thuds in his chest as he taps on the option, directing him to an empty chatroom for the both of them.
Would it be weird to do so, since they are, after all, mere strangers? It’s okay, Jaehwan isn’t obliged to reply anyways, Sanghyuk reasons out -- if Jaehwan didn’t respond, no big deal, Sanghyuk would be perfectly cool with it. And if he did respond, if he actually did -- Sanghyuk bites his lip, not wanting to keep his hopes up too high. Anyway, after all, it is better to have tried and failed, than never to have tried at all, right?
Sanghyuk types out a short “hi!”
His finger hovers over the send button, and Sanghyuk clenches his eyes tightly shut as he finally presses send, before quickly exiting the chat and placing his phone face down on his lap. That was wild, Sanghyuk exhales. The screen of his phone burns hot against his thigh. God, how stupid, stupid stupid, Sanghyuk thinks. It isn’t even like he’s texting a crush, or anything of that sort, why’s he acting all--
His thoughts are smoothly interrupted by his phone, vibrating and sounding shortly with a notification. Sanghyuk nearly jumps out of his seat -- it’s a wonder he’d managed to save his flying phone, clammy fingers, sweaty palms and all. Sanghyuk swallows nervously, and cracks an eye open to look at his notifications.
INSTAGRAM
[hsh0705]: keken_0406: hey!
[hsh0705]: keken_0406: you’re sanghyuk, right? han sanghyuk, if my memory hasn’t failed me?
Oh God. Sanghyuk rubs his eyes a little, before opening them again, almost comically wide. This is not a drill. Sanghyuk lets out an excited little cry, and quickly taps on the notification, entering once again into their chat.
[hsh0705]:
yeah! nailed it!
it’s seriously amazing how you even remember such little details…
[keken_0406]:
nah, it’s easy since i have few listeners, you know?
kinda sad, but it’s also really nice because i can get closer to my followers :)
[hsh0705]:
exactly!!
and don’t worry, with your amazing talent i’m sure you’ll grow bigger in no time ^^
[keken_0406]:
aww, thank you!
Sanghyuk releases the deep breath he’d been holding this entire time, unknowingly. The fact that this conversation is even happening, doesn’t even feel real. Sanghyuk pinches his arm once again just to confirm, and -- yes. This is real life.
[hsh0705]:
it’s really hard to put into words how thankful i am to have discovered your account…
but like, i really really like you?
as in i really admire you!
in case you might’ve gotten the wrong idea.. oops
but i mean i always listen to your singing videos and they make me really happy! and i listen to your streams at night while doing schoolwork and i must say your voice really motivates me to press on! i’m not sure how, but.. yeah :)
Stupid, stupid, Sanghyuk swears under his breath. Jaehwan must be pretty freaked out right now. Darn it.
[keken_0406]:
oh?
wahh i don’t even know how to respond to this i’m so so flattered!
;;;;;
i started out here to bless others with my voice, and to know it actually is happening is so heartwarming
you have no idea how much this means to me! you’re probably the first listener so far that’s sent me such nice messages ;;
Sanghyuk reads all of this with his bottom lip worried between his teeth, he can feel his cheeks growing hotter with each sentence, chest swelling with indescribable joy.
[keken_0406]:
thank you very very much
sanghyuk
[hsh0705]:
don’t have to thank me, i’m just stating facts ahh
knowing you’re happy makes me happy too ;;
Wait, that sounded a little weird. Sanghyuk feels the deep flush spreading down to his neck, and he recalls what led him to clicking on Jaehwan’s account again. Thank goodness, something to change the topic.
[hsh0705]:
oh right before i forget!!
[keken_0406]:
hm?
[hsh0705]:
the picture you just posted… your favourite place.. i know that café!
by any chance, do you live around in this neighbourhood too?
[keken_0406]:
oh you recognised it? nice! do you like that place too?
and yes, i live just around there!
[hsh0705]:
ehh, sorry i’m not that big of a fan of cafés, i only know that place because i study in the nearby university! our dormitories are just right opposite
woahh i can’t believe you live so close by, we live in a small world indeed!
[keken_0406]:
holy shit i graduated from there last year… glad i’m out of it
that’s cool! first year, second year?
[hsh0705]:
first!
[keken_0406]:
wait… isn’t this your exam period then?
[hsh0705]:
…yeah, actually
[keken_0406]:
hey! then you better stop chatting now! go study and get those stellar grades!
my aim is to better others’ lives, not hinder or be a distraction :’)
Distraction. Jaehwan could not have used a better word.
[hsh0705]:
you sound exactly like my mom, lol
yes i’ll get off instagram soon but just before i go!
[keken_0406]:
yes dear?
[hsh0705]:
i’m just curious, have you any plans to hold some sort of mini fanmeet or anything else along those lines?
[keken_0406]:
oh?
i’ve never actually thought of that…
but that’s an interesting idea, i’ll definitely consider!
♪ ♫ ♬
A few hell weeks later and those darned exams are finally over. Thank goodness.
But Sanghyuk’s not checked Instagram in a long time. Jaehwan couldn’t have announced a fanmeet right after their chat and was already done with it, could he? Shit, he hadn’t considered that. Sanghyuk hastily re-installs the app that he’d deleted right before the exams (to clear all distractions, specifically Jaehwan), and the first thing he does is to search up Jaehwan’s profile, breath held.
Sanghyuk’s heart races as he looks through the posts that he’d missed -- it’s mainly singing videos, as usual; and the most recent post, a day ago -- it’s a picture in that same café, a selfie this time, captioned with:
“Announcement! After some consideration, I’ve decided to hold a mini fanmeet! Nothing official, just maybe a chat at this cosy café, and maybe I’ll be singing a few songs for you at the open park nearby! So this Saturday, if you’re free, do make your way here and I’ll be waiting at 2pm! Details on the address is down below ^^ Excited~~”
Sanghyuk double checks the time of post, and -- yes. It was posted a day ago. That means Saturday will be in… three days. Holy shit. There’s bright smile on Sanghyuk’s face as he opens up their chat.
[hsh0705]:
hey i’m back from exams :D
and i came back to news of your fanmeet ahh i’m so excited!!
[keken_0406]:
the idea was all thanks to you :))
and yes i’m excited too!
glad you’re back, how were your exams?
[hsh0705]:
they went okay, i guess
had to delete instagram for a bit because otherwise i’d be way too distracted lol
[keken_0406]:
distractions, do you mean me? ;)
[hsh0705]:
yeah.
Jaehwan probably thinks Sanghyuk’s just playing along with him, right? After some thought, Sanghyuk sighs and types in a few more words.
[hsh0705]:
just kidding, haha
Not really.
[keken_0406]:
ahh, and that also explains why i didn’t see my usual ‘first viewer’ in the last few streams
[hsh0705]:
holy shit
i mean, woah
you didn’t forget about me
[keken_0406]:
you thought i would’ve forgotten about you??
you’re so cute
of course i won’t
[hsh0705]:
that’s a relief ^^
i was scared because i thought i would be too late
as in, that your fanmeet would’ve already been over by the time i got back on ;;
thank goodness you just announced it
[keken_0406]:
ah yes
i took into account that you were having exams too, sanghyuk
that’s why i pushed the date a few weeks back
‘I love you so much,’ Sanghyuk types out in what Jaehwan probably will perceive as a playful tone -- but fully meaning it. Taking in a deep breath, Sanghyuk pauses, finger hovering over the backspace button, before deleting the sentence in a flurry.
[hsh0705]:
what can i say
you’re an angel
[keken_0406]:
0:)
see you in three days, then?
[hsh0705]:
yeah!
Sanghyuk spends the rest of the night in bed, re-reading their conversation over and over, a dreamy smile fixed on his face. He’s on a slippery slope down, from here.
♪ ♫ ♬
Sanghyuk blinks sleepily, having just woken up -- and immediately (clumsily) reaches out for his phone, switching it on. It’s already eleven a.m, goodness, it’s been a while since he’d slept in so late -- Sanghyuk should’ve probably gone to bed earlier instead of staying up feeling all jittery for The Day. Smiling, Sanghyuk opens up Instagram -- the first post on his feed is from Jaehwan, a mirror selfie. He’s wearing a baby pink-coloured oversized shirt, with a little red heart towards the left of his chest, tucked into a pair of tight-fitting black jeans. Really cute.
“A few hours more to our mini fanmeet~ >< Here’s what I’ll be wearing for easier recognition, heheh”
Great. Gathering up all of the newfound energy he’d just gotten from Jaehwan’s update, Sanghyuk leaps out of bed -- haphazardly arranging the sheets before heading to the bathroom to wash up.
Now, the toughest part. Sanghyuk throws open the doors of his closet, in an almost majestic way, as if that’s going to change anything -- only to be greeted with a poor and almost pathetic variety of clothing choices. Sanghyuk sighs, it isn’t something unexpected. Never cared much about outfits or his appearance at all.
Not today, though.
After a good fifteen minutes of contemplation (the longest time Sanghyuk’s ever spent in front of his closet -- most of the time he just grabs the first thing his fingers meet and that’s that), Sanghyuk ends up with a plain button-up white top, with a pair of black pants similar to Jaehwan’s. Sighing, Sanghyuk grabs the pot of hair gel on his table, before positioning himself before the full-length wall mirror (rarely used). Cautiously, Sanghyuk dips the tips of his fingers into the barely-used gel and scoops some out, then carefully runs them through his hair, slicks his fringe up so as to look that much more presentable.
Done. Not bad at all. Now, just for some minor touch-ups -- Sanghyuk unbuttons the top button of his dress shirt, pauses, decides that two would look better, then unbuttons the second one as well. The look is finally completed when Sanghyuk rolls his sleeves up slightly, forearms exposed.
‘Looking good,’ Sanghyuk breathes as he examines his reflection -- his heart pounds loudly in his chest. He thinks to Jaehwan, and all he manages is a weak smile.
♪ ♫ ♬
When Sanghyuk steps into the café, it definitely doesn’t look like how Sanghyuk pictured it out to be -- instead of it bustling with customers, there’s only a minimal scattering of people around the shop. Sanghyuk quickly looks at his phone to check the time again -- nope, didn’t miss the timing. Slightly bewildered, Sanghyuk briefly glances over the customers in the café at the moment -- and there, Sanghyuk finally sees someone sporting a similar outfit to what Jaehwan had posted earlier, at the corner of the café, a guitar bag beside him and all. It must be Jaehwan -- Sanghyuk bites his lip and brushes his sweaty palms against his pants before taking slow, nervous steps towards the table.
‘J-Jaehwan?’
Sanghyuk had imagined their first encounter to be slightly cooler. Definitely not starting off with a damn stutter.
The boy turns around, their gazes meeting and -- it is Jaehwan, and God, he is so pretty. Looking a lot better than how those low-quality pictures make him out to be. Sanghyuk stuns for a while, lost somewhere in those large, shiny orbs and the gorgeous long line of his nose, those full lips that look pinker and smoother in person and his soft looking cheeks that Sanghyuk so badly wants to pinch. He doesn’t realise that Jaehwan’s stood up, large eyes now in the shape of pretty crescents, hand extended.
‘Yes, hello! And who might you--‘
‘Sanghyuk! First viewer,’ Sanghyuk laughs weakly, and makes sure to wipe his palms off again before shyly accepting the handshake. Jaehwan’s hand is soft and small, just like himself.
‘Ah, you’re Sanghyuk!’ Jaehwan smiles so wide, voice lifted and he sounds genuinely excited. ‘You’re a first year student? No way! You’re so tall,’ Jaehwan says, a little too animatedly. Adorable. ‘And you look, woah.’ Jaehwan slowly scans Sanghyuk up and down, and Sanghyuk could just as well melt into the ground, now, his cheeks most probably a flaming red. ‘Very mature,’ Jaehwan concludes, smiling. ‘In a good way, of course.’
‘Ahh, thank you! You look really good too,’ Sanghyuk says, voice coming out a little higher than usual. Jaehwan’s shy smile and the faint rosy blush on his cheeks at the compliment are too much for Sanghyuk, who takes his eyes off Jaehwan’s pretty face to look at his hair instead.
‘Also, your pictures are deceptive, you’re a lot shorter than what I imagined you to be,’ Sanghyuk jokes, and the shy smile is off Jaehwan’s face, now a playful pout playing on his lips instead. Much better.
‘Hey,’ Jaehwan lightly punches at a grinning Sanghyuk’s shoulder, and the fact that he’s standing a few inches shorter than Sanghyuk makes the situation seem even more amusing. Very threatening. Sanghyuk chuckles, and Jaehwan stands up straight, pushing his shoulders out and his chest forward. The crown of his head is still visible to Sanghyuk, the action doing barely anything to boost Jaehwan’s height.
‘You’re just… you’re just too tall, okay. I’m tall! I’m tall, but.. you’re taller.’ Jaehwan giggles and sits back down. ‘You remind me of a big bear.’
‘Bear?’ Sanghyuk sits down in an empty seat opposite Jaehwan, smiling. ‘Interesting, no one’s told me that before.’
‘That’s strange, the resemblance is like, a hundred percent.’
‘Yeah? Sure, if you say so…’ Sanghyuk meets Jaehwan’s soft gaze again, and it awakens the tiny butterflies in his tummy once again. Time to change the topic. ‘Have you been waiting a long time?’
‘About thirty minutes before you came,’ Jaehwan grins. ‘You really live up to your ‘first’ title, Sanghyuk. First viewer, now firstcomer again.’
‘I like you that much,’ Sanghyuk says, serious -- it’s at this that he notices Jaehwan has got really cute, pointed ears, because they perk up just the slightest bit at that comment. Gosh. ‘Basically I’m your biggest, loyal-est fan!’ Sanghyuk adds in, and smiles weakly. Jaehwan laughs at this, the sound soft and breathy and all Sanghyuk’s ever wanted to hear.
‘Wow. What did I ever do to deserve such an amazing fan like you, Sanghyuk,’ Jaehwan grins, and playfully reaches forward to ruffle a currently schoolboy-flushed and absolutely bewildered Sanghyuk’s hair.
‘Anyway, I’m not sure if we’re expecting any more fans to come,’ Jaehwan pauses, and Sanghyuk catches the way Jaehwan’s soft mouth twists sadly, for just split second -- Sanghyuk so badly wants to kiss that disappointment away -- and then a smile is back on Jaehwan’s face. ‘I probably didn’t take into account that this place may be out of the way for some of my other listeners, huh?’
Jaehwan looks down, casts his hurt gaze onto his half consumed drink, avoiding Sanghyuk’s eyes. Sanghyuk so badly wants to reach forward, to pet Jaehwan’s hair, his shoulders, and tell him that it’s okay, that everything is going to be alright. His fingers curl into the material of his dress shirt instead, unmoving.
‘Right!’ Jaehwan looks up, a pretty twinkle back in his eyes, any hint of prior emotion now gone -- and Sanghyuk’s heart aches just the slightest bit. ‘How rude of me, not to wait for you to get some food first!
‘Nah, it’s fine! Truthfully, I wouldn’t mind just chatting like this… I’m not sure if I’ll like the stuff here, I’m rather picky with food and drinks.’
‘Are you serious? No way! I’ll convert you today,’ Jaehwan gets out of his seat with an adorable look of determination in his eyes. ‘Now come with me,’ and Jaehwan doesn’t give Sanghyuk much of a choice either, just grabs at Sanghyuk’s hand, urging him out of his seat, excitedly dragging the both of them to the counter.
‘So. Look at this wonderful array of choices,’ Jaehwan gestures towards the menu, neat lines written in pastel chalks on a blackboard, and Sanghyuk’s got to admit the variety of choices is pretty awesome. ‘Swayed yet?’ Jaehwan looks up excitedly at Sanghyuk, and it takes all of him not to smile, but keep a straight face instead, which has Jaehwan sulking.
‘Regardless, you’re getting something from here today! What kind of drinks do you like, Sanghyuk?’
‘Um… Tea?’
‘Tea? Gosh, you’re really old-fashioned for someone who looks as edgy as you,’ Jaehwan sighs, shaking his head, fluffy hair swaying gently about. ‘Hmm, what kind of tea? Green tea?’
‘Yeah, that’s nice.’
‘Then I have just the thing for you!’ Jaehwan chirps, and Sanghyuk’s starting to wonder if Jaehwan’s getting sponsored by this café to promote their food or something. Sanghyuk looks at Jaehwan as he walks up to the counter and happily orders ‘one cup of hot matcha latte, please.’ Jaehwan fishes out his wallet and pays for the drink with a few loose, crumpled bills, and passes the drink over to Sanghyuk when done.
‘Here! Looks great, doesn’t it?’ Jaehwan smiles warmly, stuffing his wallet back into his jeans pocket. ‘Tastes even better, I assure you. It’s one of this café’s specialities, very highly raved about!’
‘Thank you,’ Sanghyuk accepts the cup gratefully, the drink warming his hand immediately. The drink is complete with a little heart on top, some kind of simple latte art, Sanghyuk supposes, but very pretty. ‘Hold on, let’s get back to the table so I can pay you back.’
‘Don’t,’ Jaehwan says, ‘It’s a gift of appreciation,’ Jaehwan explains and laughs softly.
Sanghyuk tries to convince Jaehwan otherwise, feeling really bad as it is their first meeting after all -- but Sanghyuk quickly learns that when Jaehwan insists, he gets his way. No buts, no point arguing back. In the end Sanghyuk relents, and promises to treat Jaehwan back some other time -- and Jaehwan nods sure, pretty pink on his cheeks.
The matcha latte tastes amazing, and Jaehwan laughs in the kind of ‘See, I told you’ way, happy at Sanghyuk’s amusing (eyes wide, jaw dropped) reaction. The hot drink warms Sanghyuk’s insides so nicely, comforting in this chilly weather -- but different from the way Jaehwan does to Sanghyuk. The unstoppable bouts of warm mushy feelings in Sanghyuk’s chest each time Jaehwan smiles or does simply anything at all -- Sanghyuk thinks that might just be love.
They finish their drinks soon enough, exchanging shy smiles and gazes.
‘I doubt we’re expecting any more people,’ Jaehwan gets out of his seat, and slings his guitar bag over his shoulder. ‘Let’s go out to the park? I know a nice place where I can sing a few songs, just for you,’ Jaehwan looks up at Sanghyuk with such a kind look in those large eyes, (and honestly, how is it possible for Sanghyuk not to sway?) ‘--and then we can call it a day.’
♪ ♫ ♬
Sanghyuk does keep his promise of making it up to Jaehwan by treating him back -- they meet again, the next week, and the next, and then the following one. Sanghyuk finds himself opening up a lot more to Jaehwan, understanding and empathetic Jaehwan who always listens, always speaks out of such a sincere and pure heart. They’ve both gotten to know each other so much better, gradually revealed little precious bits of themselves to each other, and -- at moments like this, it’s just hard to believe that there ever was a time where their relationship was simply a small struggling singer and his supportive fan, no less, no more.
Sanghyuk finds himself falling deeper, deeper into an endless pit of fluttery feelings for a soft boy with an unending love for others and completely deserving of all of that love back, oh, if not more.
♪ ♫ ♬
[hsh0705]:
hey!
so, we meeting at the café tomorrow as usual? ^^
[keken_0406]:
sorry, not this week!
i’m meeting someone really important, to discuss some stuff
actually, i’ll be pretty busy starting now so i’m not sure if we’ll have time to meet as often anymore ;;
[hsh0705]:
oh?
ahh, is that so :(
[keken_0406]:
yeah, i’m afraid
but don’t worry!
i’m going to be experimenting with something a little new for you fans :D
[hsh0705]:
ooh?
[keken_0406]:
yeah!
since, sanghyuk, you’ve been such a precious fan to me, i’ll let you in on some secret information ;)
i’ve wanted to try this out for a long time, and i’ve finally settled on it!
i’ll be doing a collaboration with one other small Instagrammer who makes music
[hsh0705]:
oh?
who?
[keken_0406]:
now that’ll be too much info heheh
wait for it on my next livestream!
this saturday night
please anticipate it!!
i’m really excited for this ahh
really hope you guys will like it, it’ll mean so much to me :))))
[hsh0705]:
ahh
of course!
i’ll definitely be anticipating this weekends’ livestreams then ^^
Sanghyuk exits the chat, feeling happy, of course, because Jaehwan’s happy; but yet there’s a strange, sad feeling, stubbornly settling in the confines of his chest. His gaze falls on the smiling teddy bear on his drawer -- a precious gift he’d contemplated over and over about, had struggled so much over how and when to give it -- and he’d meant to finally pass it to Jaehwan the next day. It’ll have to wait, then. Sanghyuk sighs and curls up in his bed, holds the soft bear close to his breast -- willing for the dull, unexplainable ache, to go away.
♪ ♫ ♬
‘Hello!’
Sanghyuk smiles at his screen as Jaehwan waves to the camera. He’s looking extra soft tonight, brown hair set in soft pretty curls across his forehead, and he’s wearing a fluffy white sweater, looking huge on his rather petite frame, the top nearly slipping off his shoulders. ‘Hello, my--’ Jaehwan leans in closer and squints a little at the screen, ‘--my twenty-five precious viewers! Welcome to KeNight!’
‘Today I have a surprise for you guys,’ Jaehwan starts, and strums his guitar lightly, humming sweetly as he reads all of the comments. Most of them are surprised, commenting question marks, and Sanghyuk smiles to himself. ‘Today I have someone very, very special joining me in our livestream.’
Oh. There’s a small stab of pain in Sanghyuk’s chest.
‘Some of you may know him already,’ Jaehwan smiles. ‘Let’s welcome a very talented rapper, Kim Wonshik, or better known as Ravi!’
Sanghyuk focuses on his screen as the boy, Wonshik, crawls out from under Jaehwan’s desk, and waves to the camera, crooked smile playing on his small mouth. He’s got piercings on his ears and nose, wearing a plain white tee and -- tanned skin adorned with a few noticeable tattoos. Next to Jaehwan, sure, he’s handsome, but he looks rather gruff, rough at the edges and -- Sanghyuk doesn’t exactly like this. It’s too early to judge, though, right?
Sanghyuk sighs as Jaehwan introduces Wonshik to the audience, not exactly paying attention to what he’s saying. All Sanghyuk sees is how Jaehwan’s more giggly than usual, the shy smiles Sanghyuk treasured so dearly on their dates are especially present in here -- and at one point Jaehwan reaches forward to run his fingers through Wonshik’s platinum blonde and seemingly soft hair, ruffling it up, laughing.
Sanghyuk suddenly thinks to their first meetup, how Jaehwan had done the exact same thing -- the jarring familiarity of it all, it throws a strong punch at Sanghyuk’s chest.
Wonshik, too. He doesn’t take his eyes off Jaehwan, not once -- droopy eyes way too telling, overflowing with affection and the thing is, Wonshik isn’t afraid to show it. Sanghyuk continues watching the stream, helpless, irrational jealousy bubbling in his tummy -- as Wonshik showers Jaehwan with affection, doesn’t refrain from telling Jaehwan how cute he is, unlike Sanghyuk; isn’t afraid to pet Jaehwan’s hair and pet his neck and pinch his neck and his cheeks and everything Sanghyuk’s longed to do, but never has. Wonshik handles out the love that Jaehwan so badly craves back, without restraint, so effortlessly and generously -- it reduces Jaehwan to a giggling, rosy-cheeked mess -- and he’s happy, so happy.
Their voices are a heavenly blend, it cannot be denied. They take requests and sing a few popular songs, most of them following the pattern of Jaehwan’s smooth and thick vocals followed by Wonshik’s rhythmic, relaxing rap breaks over Jaehwan’s soft guitar instrumentals -- and then finally them coming together in the chorus, Wonshik’s deep tones complimenting Jaehwan’s sweet voice perfectly.
Commenters are really active today. Full of compliments and hand clapping emojis and crying faces, expressing their love for the duo. Sanghyuk catches a few comments, saying how good they look together, how they look like such a perfect pair. Saying please, this collaboration cannot be a one-time thing, how it needs to last forever. Jaehwan is beaming by the time the livestream ends -- fully encouraged, overjoyed.
Tonight, marks the first livestream during which Sanghyuk doesn’t leave a single comment, or song request.
♪ ♫ ♬
Sunday morning, rain is falling.
Sanghyuk clutches the coat tighter around himself, quickening his steps as he makes his way towards the café -- gosh it is so cold. Finally, Sanghyuk arrives at his destination, and pushes at the door to enter -- little twinkling bells welcoming and announcing his arrival. The inside of the café is warm from the many heaters placed all around, and oh, so comforting.
A small smile tugs at Sanghyuk’s lips as he orders a cup of hot matcha latte, before making his way towards that very table tucked into the corner. Sanghyuk slips into an empty seat, releasing a deep sigh.
The seat opposite his is empty.
Fumbling a little into his pocket, Sanghyuk finally fishes out the little teddy bear keychain -- thank goodness it didn’t get wet from the rain just now, light brown fur still dry and fluffy and -- a happy smile sewn onto its little face. Sanghyuk sighs and rubs his thumb against its furry face gently.
He’d lost the chance to pass it to Jaehwan.
A wistful smile plays on Sanghyuk’s chapped lips as his gaze falls on the view outside, through the café’s clear glass windows. His cheek presses against the glass, the surface cold and almost slightly stinging against his skin. Sanghyuk sadly observes as falling raindrops make their own little trails down the clear surface, some mingling together and then, never to be seen again.
An image flashes across Sanghyuk’s closed eyes -- Jaehwan, pretty and soft Jaehwan with a fiery passion for music, holding onto his treasured guitar, eyes closed and pretty lips parted around song lyrics. A familiar voice plays in Sanghyuk’s ears, now -- smooth, thick with emotion, and everything nice. Then another voice joins his, low in pitch and blending with Jaehwan’s perfectly and -- there’s suddenly a thrumming, painful ache in Sanghyuk’s chest.
A lot has changed.
Jaehwan no longer sings on his own, he and Wonshik now make music as a duo, on a separate account. Popularity came creeping in fast, ever since that eventful livestream -- fans absolutely loved their talent, loved how their voices sounded together, how good they looked together. Weekly nightstreams with barely twenty viewers was no more. Never again. First viewer was now impossible, no more personalised song requests. The cosy feeling of familiarity vanished as quickly as how everything began.
Also, there’s now a new something in Jaehwan’s soft eyes, it appears whenever he looks at Wonshik, and Sanghyuk knows it too well. It mirrors exactly how Sanghyuk used to look at him, either through his phone screen during a livestream, or during their short-lived but once-frequent meetups. The only difference is that Jaehwan’s looking at Wonshik like that, and not Sanghyuk.
It’s a feeling that never was meant for Sanghyuk, not once -- it was just Sanghyuk, rash and smitten Sanghyuk, who’d gotten his hopes too high.
But Jaehwan’s truly happy now, doing what he loves, in love -- Sanghyuk should rightfully be feeling glad.
There’s still a suffocating pull in Sanghyuk’s chest, though, and it hurts. Fighting the burning sensation in his eyes and the sharp twinge in his nose, Sanghyuk reaches forward, takes the teddy bear into his trembling hands and presses into its soft belly lightly. A soft, crackly voice recorded message trails from the small keychain.
notes: before we begin i’d like to apologise for neglecting this blog for quite a bit! just to let you guys know, i’ll now be updating fics more frequently on my ao3 account @/hwanrem instead :)
‘anyway,’ sanghyuk takes his eyes off jaehwan for a bit, to set the hot mug and heat packs onto the dresser. ‘just to confirm your suspicions.’ sanghyuk turns to jaehwan again, and flashes a big smile as he grabs the sweater hanging off his shoulder.
‘tonight i’m here to keep you warm, hyung.’
‘jaehwan hyung?’
sanghyuk knocks on the door, before cracking it open slightly. he steps into the room, making sure to close the door behind him, and is greeted with the sight of jaehwan -- clearly fresh out of the shower, dark hair ruffled messily and still slightly damp, towel slung over his shoulder, himself clad in a simple plain tee and comfortable sweatpants. jaehwan’s sleepy eyes widen just slightly when sanghyuk meets his gaze -- sanghyuk smiles affectionately, warmth blooming in his chest at the little twinkle in jaehwan’s tired eyes, the faint coral blush in his cheeks and the excited little twitch of his ears.
‘wow,’ jaehwan starts, full lips stretching into a pretty smile. ‘i wanted to ask why you were here at first, but the reason is pretty apparent isn’t it,’ jaehwan laughs, the sound of it so pretty.
‘indeed,’ sanghyuk grins. with a large sweater slung over his shoulder, mug of hot drink in his hand and a pile of dollar-store heat packs held in the other -- he must look quite a sight -- and this is confirmed with the questionable look in jaehwan’s eyes, like he’s torn between whether to be plain amused or to simply explode with love and affection for the younger.
‘anyway,’ sanghyuk takes his eyes off jaehwan for a bit, to set the hot mug and heat packs onto the dresser. ‘just to confirm your suspicions.’ sanghyuk turns to jaehwan again, and flashes a big smile as he grabs the sweater hanging off his shoulder.
‘tonight i’m here to keep you warm, hyung.’
‘and the first thing,’ sanghyuk takes a big step towards a jaehwan, looking shy and even smaller than usual. ‘the first thing to do is to put this sweater on.’ sanghyuk gestures for jaehwan to lift his arms up, and slips the clearly oversized, fuzzy sweater over jaehwan’s thinly-clothed frame. when he’s done, sanghyuk takes a small step back to admire his work, chuckling at the sight -- jaehwan looks tiny, drowned in that pale-yellow sweater.
‘you look like a baby chick’ sanghyuk teases, and reaches forward to pinch at jaehwan’s soft (soft) cheek. ‘so cute.’
jaehwan pouts and pretends to be offended for a bit -- sanghyuk grins and runs his fingers gently across jaehwan’s jaw, cradles his chin affectionately -- and eventually, inevitably, a little smile breaks out across his face.
‘i didn’t think anyone would listen when i complained about my room being cold at night. thankfully you came to the rescue.’ jaehwan says as he gratefully accepts the mug of hot mocha that sanghyuk carefully passes over, takes a small sip and lets out an exaggerated sigh of contentment. cute.
‘you may exaggerate sometimes' sanghyuk playfully mocks as he watches jaehwan finish his drink (the way jaehwan holds that big mug between those ridiculous sweater paws is very cute). 'but you know that i'll take everything you say seriously.'
at this, jaehwan looks up from behind his mug and sets the drink down.
'how could you? i never exaggerate, sanghyukie! you don't agree with me on the fact that this room is as cold as antartica?'
jaehwan's got chocolate foam all over his upper lip. sanghyuk swallows down a giggle, and puts on the best straight face he can manage.
'no i don’t think so,' sanghyuk starts, and jaehwan pouts even more, crosses his arms over his chest and lets out an angry little huff. with foam all over his mouth.
'fine,' sanghyuk fights the smile itching at his lips at the sight of a faux angry jaehwan with chocolate smeared across his mouth. 'yeah it's like antartica in here. brrrrrrr it's so c-cold!' sanghyuk crosses his arms and shivers with his whole body for extra emphasis.
'now you're being mean,' jaehwan laughs and smacks sanghyuk’s shoulder.
'okay, but i did check the weather forecast for today, and it did say that tonight was going to be pretty cold. so fine, i will not entirely discount your argument about it being like antartica in here.'
'that's the way,' jaehwan nods.
'by the way, hyung.'
'what?'
'i didn't say this earlier because you looked so adorable, but.'
what?’
'you've got… a chocolate moustache.'
sanghyuk grabs the nearby handheld mirror and pushes it to jaehwan’s face, chuckling at his wide-eyed look of horror.
‘and you just let me continue talking without stopping me? i must’ve looked stupid! you little--‘
'no, it was because you looked so cute, hyung. and it was extra cute when you argued with me with that moustache' sanghyuk laughs and pokes at a sulking jaehwan's cheek again. 'well, aren't you going to do something about it now that i've told you?'
'why don't you do something about it?'
'it isn't my mouth hyung, how can--'
'kiss me'
'what'
eyes fluttering shut, jaehwan leans in close, lips puckering up for a kiss. 'kiss it away'
'you're ridiculous,' sanghyuk starts, but gives in to jaehwan anyway, like he does every single time -- leans forward to meet jaehwan's lips, hand reaching up to cup jaehwan's cheek as he kisses the sweet foam away. jaehwan tastes like a marvellous mix of both chocolate and strawberry, the latter probably from the flavouring of jaehwan's favourite lip balm. they part with sweet, shy smiles on their faces.
'now,' jaehwan blushes as he looks up at sanghyuk. 'what’s left to do? i’m getting sleepy.’
‘there’s only one last thing,’ sanghyuk gets up and laces his fingers with jaehwan’s, guides the both of them onto the bed.
‘go on,’ sanghyuk motions for jaehwan to lie down. sanghyuk follows after, gently easing jaehwan onto his side before hugging the elder from behind. ‘this is the last step to keeping you warm, hyung’
‘cuddles?’ jaehwan groans, and sanghyuk cannot see, but jaehwan is smiling, so brightly. ‘you’re so cheesy, i thought you would’ve come up with a better idea--‘
‘don’t like it?’ sanghyuk quickly withdraws his arms from jaehwan and sits up. ‘then we can forgo this step. i’m done keeping you warm for tonight then, hyung. goodbye--‘
‘no,’ jaehwan quickly turns and grabs sanghyuk’s arms, insistently tugging them around himself again, securing them around his waist. ‘i was kidding, gosh.’ now facing sanghyuk, jaehwan also circles his arms around the younger, without any intention to let him go -- presses soft fleeting kisses against sanghyuk’s neck before burying his face into the warm crevice there.
‘stop trying to appease me, you really hurt my feelings, hyung. so insensitive.’ sanghyuk grins, spanking jaehwan’s ass lightly, and jaehwan makes a small sound against his neck.
‘come on,’ jaehwan smacks sanghyuk’s hip in return, ‘you knew very well i was just teasing, you know how much i love cuddles!’
(especially ones with you)
‘shh- it's okay, i’ll be the bigger man and forgive you this time, hyung.’ sanghyuk smiles as jaehwan sighs and rolls his eyes. ‘now turn around.’
‘why? are you planning to leave me now?’
‘no, i just want us to do it like how we did initially.’ sanghyuk carefully shifts them around until he’s hugging jaehwan from behind again, and takes in a deep breath of the earthy scent of the soft hairs lining jaehwan’s sensitive nape. ‘i like it best like this.’
‘gosh, you needy big spoon.’
‘oh come on hyung, you love being the little spoon too. you’re just in denial.’
‘i never denied it,’ jaehwan giggles. ‘i just said you were a needy big spoon.’
‘okay, okay. i’m not going to try to win an argument against you.’ sanghyuk pauses, and throws a leg over jaehwan’s hip. ‘anyway, i admit i do love being big spoon because that means i get to have you in my arms.’ jaehwan feels sanghyuk’s lips curl up against his neck -- his heart skips a beat.
there’s a short period of silence. jaehwan shifts slightly in sanghyuk’s arms, and feels sanghyuk exhale against his neck, breath warm and comforting.
‘sanghyukie, are you asleep?’
‘yes.’
a smile tugs at the corners of jaehwan’s lips at the snarky reply.
‘you know, sanghyuk... winter just arrived.’
‘mmhm.’
‘and… the heater in my room is spoilt. and-- and winter doesn’t just last for a day. tomorrow is going to be cold too, tomorrow tomorrow is going to be cold--’
‘uh huh.’
‘you know what i’m getting at?’
sanghyuk makes a sound, and tightens his arms around jaehwan’s waist.
‘then you’ll do the explaining if my dear roommate wonshik-hyung ever complains to me about feeling lonely, okay? now shhh, go to sleep.’
it’s a deal. jaehwan’s heart flutters, and he feels warm, oh so warm.
i will be opening prompts on my curiouscat starting today at https://curiouscat.me/hwanrem! just drop a prompt and i'll try to reply with a drabble, if i'm feeling the prompt maybe even a full length shot :33 this is because i'll be getting busier soon and while i may not have the time to write fic, i do still want to practice with shorter drabbles :)
your rose fic actually fucked me up so much. it was such an amazing story! (im also bawling like a baby because it hit me straight in the feels) YOUR STORIES ARE SO GOOD AHHHH
i'm glad it did what it was supposed to do :33 thank you for the support :D 💕
Your keo fics are the best! Your fics in general ♡ and I love the way you write;;. I've just finished your last kenvi and... It's fantastic! God, poor Wonsik.(?) Love your work! ♡ Please, we need more keo ;n; (?)
ahhh thank you so much for the support! 💕i love keo too, of course there will be more to come~
i love when you write kenvi, but why are they all so sad? you're breaking my heart TT (😂😂😂 but seriously, I really love the way you write, this blog is one of the bests! 💚)
i really love kenvi - but i always get such angsty/melancholic vibes from them yes i'm weird and probably the only one... don't get me wrong, they are still very much in Love :)thank you so much for reading and supporting~ <3
He doesn’t tell Jaehwan about the tattoo he’d just discovered, this very morning, on his left hip: a pretty, detailed rose -- in the centre of it a deep red, colour lightening gradually to a soft white at the petals’ edges.
Loud music fills the club, heavy beats dropping out of the blue, glaring lights flashing in a different colour each second, blinding Wonshik -- he’s starting to get a headache; the place is so, so crowded he can barely breathe, barely anyone sober and Wonshik questions why he’d even agreed to come here with Hakyeon in the first place. No one is even caring to approach him, for a drink, a dance, anything. Hakyeon had said this was so as to let Wonshik have an experience of what it feels like, adult life -- but Wonshik honestly thinks it might be better to just be home, right now. Head pounding, Wonshik fumbles for his cup of iced water and takes a small sip, blinking his eyes rapidly in hopes of shutting out the blinding lights as he tries to look for Hakyeon -- a task seemingly impossible in this large and unkempt crowd.
Suddenly, Wonshik feels hands around his neck, a smaller body pressed up to his chest -- his lips parting in an unsounded noise of surprise, hazy mind overflowing with unsorted thoughts. Before Wonshik can think to push and get the body off him, there’s a soft whisper in his ear -- weirdly jarring against the pounding music.
‘Please,’ the voice says, and Wonshik, mouth dry and blinking quickly, faintly makes out the person pressed up against him. It’s a boy, tall but still smaller in stature compared to Wonshik himself, light haired. Wonshik stares through lidded eyes, bleary gaze falling onto the boy’s mouth -- tinted a cherry red, lips glistening and soft-looking. It’s hard to make his face out clearly in such a situation, but Wonshik can already tell that this boy is… pretty.
‘My ex… I just saw him, don’t want him to notice me.’
Pretty voice shaky and tinged with despair. Wonshik clenches his eyes shut and swallows back a moan when he feels the boy’s bony hips moving against his own, feels a trembling grip on his shoulders. His hands, wait -- why are they moving? Mental efforts futile and overpowered by filthy desires, Wonshik’s hands end up on the boy’s thin waist -- a shaky hold, moving the both of them together. He’s fully sober, with absolutely nothing to push the blame of these actions onto -- yet feeling so drunk, drunk off this pleasurable feeling, thoughts fuzzy and sanity melting away. Wonshik moans as he feels his cock hardening, straining tight against the tough material of his jeans: hands squeezing tight at the soft curve of the boy’s waist, hips continuously grinding against the smaller boy’s crotch in search for that sinful friction -- high pitched whimpering noises hot against his ear, drowning out the club music.
They move against each other like this, needy and sloppy and without a care for the explanations that’ll be needed later; and at one point the boy even presses his mouth against Wonshik’s neck, runs his mouth down the sharp line of Wonshik’s jaw -- lips so fucking soft, mouth leaving moist and burning marks in its wake.
More, more.
(Oh please, press one to my lips.)
When Wonshik blinks open, mind slightly cleared out -- everyone’s still dancing wildly, the glaring lights are still flashing annoyingly, music still uncomfortably loud; but there’s no longer a body pressed against his own. His prior thoughts of finding Hakyeon have completely disappeared, weirdly -- now only filled with a strange desire for that boy which… shouldn’t be there. Wonshik looks around, gaze flickering left and right, before he spots that familiar face -- pushing a filled cup against his lips, eyes heavy lidded and -- letting out a shaky exhale, fragile frame shaken with unsounded sobs.
Wonshik stands there as he observes the boy drink cup after cup of alcohol, his movements gradually heavier and less coordinated -- a total stranger, why should Wonshik even care? What is this worry itching at him, telling him to approach the boy, do something? Right, he’d mentioned his ex. A lingering, unsettling feeling of jealousy tugs at Wonshik’s heart. The boy finally downs the last cup and collapses onto the counter, energy almost visibly rushed out of his body. Wonshik releases a quiet cry, quickly walking over.
When would this boy finally return to his sober state? How would he get home like this? No, Wonshik can’t just leave him there: drunk and vulnerable, open for simply any other person to take advantage of -- an absolutely terrible thought, Wonshik tries his best to push it away. Wonshik bites his lip as he finally settles in a seat beside the boy, himself slightly shaken by the boy’s broken, whimpering sounds.
Wonshik places a careful hand on the back of the boy’s neck, softly and cautiously stroking at the short hairs there in some attempt to comfort, to get a response out of him. Surely enough, the boy stops shaking -- slowly, he looks up at Wonshik: lidded eyes slightly swollen and reddened, cheeks a pretty ruddy red, glistening crystals forming at the corners of those pretty eyes. He’s beautiful.
‘Are you okay?’
Wonshik asks, although sure of the answer.
The boy looks at Wonshik, expression unreadable. Pushes another clear glass to his lips, swallows a bit of that burning fluid, then chuckles softly. Miserably.
'Why?'
Wonshik cocks his head towards one side, and places a gentle hand on the boy's cheek. His skin is hot against Wonshik’s palm, and slightly moist. The boy blinks slowly, so slowly; soft gaze unfocused. There’s a sudden, slight pang of unexplainable pain in Wonshik’s tight chest.
‘You seem…’ Wonshik brushes his thumb against the faint tear tracks on the boy’s cherry cheeks, thumb soothing a few gentle circles into soft, warmed skin. The boy doesn’t give any sort of reaction or distaste, merely staying still, barely leaning into Wonshik’s touch. ‘Sad.’
The boy pauses, and turns away to drink the last bit of clear liquid in his glass, setting the cup down with a heavy thud. Wonshik notes a dark tattoo, unusually inked on the inside of the boy’s pale, thin wrist. Eyes fluttering shut, the boy’s body trembles with a shaky breath.
‘I am.’
//
On Wonshik’s left ankle -- a detailed tattoo of a little sun.
Everyone else has too, tattoos on their own ankles -- none the same, each and every little work of art completely personalised and unique to the person, body. These tattoos, given since birth, are special. To some, they mean the world; and to others, nothing but absolutely painful memories.
When one falls in love -- a tattoo belonging the person they love will form somewhere, anywhere, on their own body. The feeling doesn’t need to be mutual for the tattoo to form -- a source of great pain, for a one-sided love. Memories of a broken love haunting one forever; tattoos of people who’d contributed to one’s brokenness, inked onto one’s body for life. Broken souls go to great lengths in hopes of erasing such painful memories, only to realise eventually, that these tattoos are simply impossible to remove.
A perpetual reminder.
//
‘I headed back first, in case you were looking for me.’
Wonshik hastily types out a message to Hakyeon as he tips the cab driver off. Hakyeon’s probably too drunk and having too much fun to notice or care, though. Wonshik looks over to the body leaning against his own, letting out a soft sigh. With some struggle, Wonshik manages to get the boy out of the cab -- the boy is small but he certainly isn’t light: deadweight stumbling and falling straight out of the vehicle, steadied only with Wonshik’s arm coiled tight around his waist.
Wonshik manages to get the both of them to the entrance of his apartment with some difficulty, unlocking the door -- they’re finally in, Wonshik heaving a sigh of relief as the the door clicks shut and the lights flick on. Here: Wonshik hooks an arm around the undersides of the boy’s knees, hoisting his body up with another arm around his back -- arms straining with the weight, steps careful as he walks them both towards the master room, a single bed placed in the middle.
Wonshik’s gaze flickers over the boy’s body when he’s finally, gently settled down onto the clean sheets -- the skin of his neck tingling and a weird feeling settling in the pits of his stomach as he gazes, enthralled, over the soft lines of the boy’s pretty, seemingly peaceful sleeping face; over the thin material of his worn tee; the rips in his leather-tight jeans: too high up on his thighs, exposing sliver after sliver of pale skin; and finally, down to his bare, exposed feet.
And there, Wonshik spots it -- not chancing upon it but by looking out, searching for it: there on the boy’s bony ankle, an inked rose. In the centre of it a deep red, colour lightening gradually to a soft white at the petals’ edges. Wonshik’s heart thuds heavily in his chest: it’s really pretty, just like the boy himself.
Movements soft and careful -- Wonshik grabs the sheets and pulls them over the sleeping body, not wanting to wake him up. The covers finally reach the boy’s shoulders, and that’s when Wonshik spots it again: a flash of dark ink on the inside of his wrist, stark against the pretty pale of his skin. A stave, with a few musical notes adorning it.
Wonshik bites his lip, and pulls away.
A painful memory.
Wonshik flicks the lights off and closes the door softly before heading out into the spare bedroom -- heavy, tired body collapsing onto the mattress, falling into a deep slumber.
//
Blink, blink -- Jaehwan squints at the sudden uncomfortable flash of light in his eyes. No, he couldn’t possibly still be in the club, could he? Jaehwan grunts softly, entire body aching and limp, sitting up with great effort. The surface underneath is soft, a bed. Jaehwan rubs at his stinging eyes and looks around desperately, unable to identify the room he’s in. All he remembers is that he’d drunk quite a bit, memories still fuzzy. Had he... done anything wrong?
Jaehwan bites his lip as he gets up, off the bed, walking over towards the full length mirror in the room. Light hair tousled messily with sleep, clothes intact. No questionable marks spotted anywhere on his skin, no sharp pains in his lower body.
Where was he?
Jaehwan takes in a deep breath as he walks towards the still closed door, cautiously placing a hand on the cool knob and twisting. The door opens, and Jaehwan’s greeted with the living space of a small apartment. A man, seated at the dining table, and two sets of bowls placed in front.
That man, and Jaehwan recalls a few events from the previous day, a sour twinge in his nose. He’d seen… Taekwoon, yesterday. And then he’d rashly approached someone in hopes of not being noticed. It was this man. This would be his apartment, then?
Jaehwan takes a few shaky steps towards to table, a sheepish, more so apologetic look on his face. The man looks up -- eyes kind, so kind -- Jaehwan’s gaze flickers away, breath hitched in his throat.
‘I-- ahh, I’m so sorry about what happened yesterday, I wasn’t trying to take advantage of you or anything--’
‘No worries,’ the man interrupts, laughing, a deep breathy sound. Jaehwan bites his lip.
‘Hope you’re not too hungover from yesterday,’ the man gestures towards the bowl of cereal. ‘I’m not sure what would be okay for you, so I thought cereal might be the safest choice.’
Jaehwan’s heart catches in his chest, teeth digging painfully into his bottom lip.
‘Um, have a seat and eat some?’
‘Oh… okay,’ Jaehwan quickly pulls out the chair -- sitting down and nervously grabbing the spoon, his gaze flitting up to meet the man’s charming one for a split second before quickly looking down at the bowl of cereal -- swollen lips parting in a soft ‘thank you,’ which earns a deep voiced welcome.
Jaehwan scoops a bit of cereal into his mouth, milk fresh and cool in his mouth, munching and savouring the faint taste softly. It’s good.
‘Before I forget.’
Jaehwan pauses and swallows at the sudden interruption before looking up nervously.
‘My name is Wonshik,’ the man smiles, small mouth tugging up at the sides into a pretty smirk, soft hand extended out in invitation.
‘Ah,’ Jaehwan laughs softly, reaching out to quickly return the handshake. ‘I’m… Jaehwan.’
‘Jaehwan.’
Jaehwan’s ears tingle weirdly with the sound of his name coming from Wonshik’s mouth. The way he’d said it… slowly, carefully -- almost reverently, as if he was something precious. But broken, sad, and still pining for someone that’s long gotten their relationship, whatever it is that was between them -- Jaehwan isn’t worth being treasured, not at all.
Jaehwan wills the sharp pinch in his nose away, scooping up another mouthful of cereal into his mouth, feet tapping softly against the wooden floor.
‘Thank you for… taking care of me.’ Jaehwan says, breath slightly hitched. ‘I don’t know what I would’ve done if I had been left there, alone.’
‘It’s all good,’ Wonshik smiles, dark eyes crinkling up warmly. Jaehwan doesn’t want to sway. ‘You just seemed… like you needed help. A listening ear, a shoulder to lean on, maybe.’
Needed help. Yeah, sure he did.
Needed fixing.
‘You’ve got a place to stay?’
‘I’m staying in a friend’s apartment, for now. I’m starting to feel a little out of place, though.’ Jaehwan pauses, unsure of why he’d even thought to mention that. ‘He’s… starting to bring his boyfriend home more often now. So… ahh,’ Jaehwan bites his lip. ‘It’s a little awkward for me?’
‘Oh,’ Wonshik says. ‘I see.’
Suddenly, there’s a warm touch to his hand -- Wonshik reaching out, gently clasping Jaehwan’s hand in his own. Eyes widening, Jaehwan almost flinches away -- barely, a rush of mixed emotions coursing in his veins.
‘Would you want to stay here? I… don’t mind at all,’ Wonshik says, and Jaehwan sees nothing but sincerity in those dark eyes.
But then again -- he’d been wrong, before.
Wonshik chuckles, the sound getting to Jaehwan’s head. ‘I have a spare, unoccupied room anyway, and I rarely have anyone over.’
Jaehwan’s chest tightens.
‘Not going to lie… I feel really lonely sometimes.’ Deep voice getting softer, tinged with slight melancholy. ‘It’d be nice… to have some company, I guess.’
Eyes fluttering shut, then blinking open: a mass of conflicting and unsorted thoughts swarming and buzzing incessantly inside of Jaehwan’s disoriented brain -- the reply suddenly rushes out of Jaehwan, a shock to Jaehwan himself.
‘Sure.’
The regret will seep in, slowly.
//
They get closer, definitely.
Wonshik had noticed how Jaehwan had seemed… a little wary, at first, slightly reserved. Wonshik hadn’t put too much thought into that -- knowing it’s all probably because of his still unspoken-of ex. Wonshik chest still tightens a little, each time he catches sight of Jaehwan’s stained inner wrist. But Jaehwan’s definitely opened up a lot more, now -- not as quiet as he was when he’d first moved in -- pretty vibrant, in fact, cracking jokes here and there then getting shy after; adding such a fresh flavour to Wonshik’s otherwise dull life.
Their days would start with a home-made breakfast -- usually just cereal, unless Wonshik chooses to wake up slightly earlier with another menu in mind. The food he cooks always receives praise from Jaehwan, though the eggs always taste rather bland and weirdly mushy in Wonshik’s mouth. They both work, for the most part of the day: Wonshik would give Jaehwan a short ride to the convenience store where he works as a part-timer, before heading to his own office -- and then he’d drive off to pick Jaehwan up in the evening, before heading home. Then they’d order food for dinner because both of them would be too tired to move out of the house -- usually calling for two orders of black bean noodles; if not ringing up the fast food place nearby for a delivery of two sets of double-cheese burgers.
(Jaehwan’s a heavy sleeper, always tough to call up. He shares a similar music taste with Wonshik, and his soft singing voice sounds heavenly, so sweet -- he’s always shyly singing along to the songs playing from the stereo in Wonshik’s car. Jaehwan’s a messy eater, but looks adorable with black bean sauce smeared all around his mouth -- and Jaehwan seems to like it when Wonshik helps to wipe the mess off.
Wonshik unconsciously finds himself taking note and remembering all of these little details.
Falling.)
Their days would end with them lazily sprawled over Wonshik’s couch, childish and playful bickering over who gets to choose which channel to watch -- they always end up settling on watching silly romantic sitcoms, though: sharing giggles and faces twisting into expressions of mock disgust at the many cringe-worthy lines. Sometimes, sometimes… like right now:
Wonshik suddenly feels a weight on his shoulder -- he looks down to see Jaehwan’s light hair, head nuzzled comfortably against his shoulder, the crook of his neck. Dark lashes fluttering as he watches scene after scene play across the bright TV screen.
And then there’s that same unusual feeling, something fluttering deep in his chest, just like how he’d felt the first time he’d brought Jaehwan home, laid the boy down. And the next thing Wonshik knows, he finds his palm settled against the warm skin of Jaehwan’s puffy cheek, thumb stroking listlessly at the soft flesh -- Jaehwan doesn’t pull away either; a contented little noise escaping his parted mouth.
Jaehwan rarely makes it through their TV watching sessions -- always knocked out halfway, slumped boneless against Wonshik’s arm, letting out soft little breaths as he sleeps.
Like right now, always looking so peaceful.
Always so… tired.
Wonshik stares at Jaehwan’s sleeping form for a good while, mind blank, before grabbing the remote to switch the TV and speakers off -- the apartment is suddenly filled with a discomforting darkness, silence. Wonshik blinks a few times, drowsily, Jaehwan’s skin still warm against his palm, small frame rising and falling with each breath.
Suddenly feeling so -- alone.
What was this, exactly? A relationship, could it even be termed that? Whatever it is right now, between him and Jaehwan? Wonshik stares at the red, blinking light on his wireless modem. Were there any romantic feelings shared between them? Highly likely, on his part -- but there’s still a part to Jaehwan that’s not completely open, a sensitive, very broken part of him, all because of that little inked piece -- and Wonshik knows this all too well. He remembers so clearly, waking up to nights with the kitchen lights strangely turned on, only to find Jaehwan: slumped against the cabinets, opened cans of beer by his side, small body curled in upon himself, arms hugging his knees to his body and head hung low -- body shaking with sobs, looking so terribly small and fragile. Those nights, where Wonshik’s heart always ached so badly and there always was such a strong yearning to reach out, to provide Jaehwan with some sort of comfort, somehow -- if how much he’s already invested and done so far isn’t nearly enough--
Wonshik releases a shaky breath, a thrumming ache in his chest.
Just a platonic relationship, then, or simply… nothing at all? Just Wonshik overthinking things and letting his hopes get the better of his rationality? At this thought, Wonshik feels his fingers tremble against Jaehwan’s cheek -- throat suddenly very dry.
Desperate for an answer, with thought after thought plaguing his tired mind -- then finally overcome with fatigue, Wonshik starts slowly drifting off into a deep sleep, Jaehwan laying by his side.
//
Tonight, is a night not unlike other ones.
Having downed merely two cans of beer, Wonshik’s still fairly sober -- thoughts slightly fuzzy, on the bare edge of being drunk. The same cannot be said for Jaehwan, though: four cans emptied and now onto his fifth one, lithe body sprawled across the couch, head resting in the heat of Wonshik’s lap, wet lips parted around sudden bursts of giggles. Wonshik blankly grasps Jaehwan’s hand in his own, idly stroking and playing with Jaehwan’s thin, pretty fingers, warmth spreading in his chest -- his slightly unfocused gaze falling onto the tattoo on Jaehwan’s inner wrist, now -- thoughts unsorted, a cautious finger reaching out to touch the skin there. At this, Jaehwan flinches almost violently, hand falling suddenly out of Wonshik’s grasp.
Wonshik’s breath hitches, lips dry.
‘That tattoo… is that your ex’s?’ Wonshik drawls, and it’s followed by a disconcerting quiet, echoing throughout the apartment.
Jaehwan stiffens in Wonshik’s lap, eyes fluttering open drowsily. The wooziness in his head is gone, suddenly.
.
Taekwoon.
Jaehwan had been…way too young -- naïve, inexperienced and unloved. And Taekwoon, he’d been so kind. It was easy falling, way too easy -- simply because Taekwoon had been the first person to actually show some sort of interest and genuine concern for Jaehwan. And Jaehwan was oh, so trusting.
They’d gotten closer, and he’d let himself be used in wrong ways -- feelings of guilt were pushed away quickly, though, because Taekwoon was still always so nice. Always so soft and understanding and… loving. Jaehwan had fallen too deep, -- he still remembers clearly the day he had discovered Taekwoon’s tattoo on his own wrist -- to change anything. By the time he’d realised that something was off about their relationship, that Taekwoon wasn’t the same -- not nearly as soft anymore, rough at the edges and so terribly hurtful -- it was way too late.
The damage could not have been reversed.
He’d let himself be used, for Taekwoon’s personal satisfaction -- only to realise later that Taekwoon had not loved him at all -- not even in the least bit. Taekwoon already had a partner, the whole time. Everything had ended and crumbled to bits, just as quickly as how it’d started. Jaehwan, abandoned, and left alone: body and mind broken, heart aching, and an eternal reminder etched into his skin--
Yet Jaehwan still isn’t fully sure, if he’s really come to terms with this miserable reality.
.
‘Yeah. Why?’
Jaehwan sits up slowly, trying as best as possible to focus on Wonshik’s face -- efforts futile, everything’s just a blurry mess. There’s a cool touch to his face, exactly like how it’d been in the club, the first time they’d met. Jaehwan leans into the comforting touch, unknowingly, softly.
‘Does it hurt?’
Jaehwan’s heart tightens in his chest, the tattoo on his wrist stinging his skin a little.
‘The tattoo?’
Jaehwan knows too well what Wonshik means.
‘No,’ Wonshik drawls, a tinge of amusement to his voice, but mostly apology -- pity, maybe. ‘You.’
Are you hurting?
A long pause.
Wonshik almost thinks the night is just going to end at this, the topic never to be spoken of again, head drooping down with fatigue -- until there’s a weight on his lap. Eyes blinking open, and Wonshik’s greeted with the sight of Jaehwan settled in his lap: skinny thighs spread open over Wonshik’s body; pretty face pushed in way too close for Wonshik’s sanity -- large eyes shining but tears unshed; the tip of his pretty nose reddened, so as his cherry flushed cheeks. Wonshik blinks a few times, unbelieving of the current situation, only to find arms sloppily wrapping around his neck, Jaehwan’s hot face buried into the sweaty crook of his collarbone. What--
‘Yes, fuck-- it does. It hurts so much.’
Fingers clenching tight into the thin material of Wonshik’s cotton tee, Jaehwan slowly pushes his hips down into Wonshik’s lap, clothed ass rolling downwards to meet a surprised Wonshik’s hardening crotch. There’s a cool sensation on Wonshik’s skin where Jaehwan’s face had been buried -- a thin smear of tears.
‘Fuck me, Wonshik’ Jaehwan pleads, hips moving, wet gasps echoing in Wonshik’s ear, ‘--make it hurt a little less, do something.’
Wide-eyed, mouth dry and unable to form any coherent thoughts or words -- Wonshik finds his hands moving on their own: disappearing under the hem of Jaehwan’s tee to roam over the flat planes of Jaehwan’s narrow chest, the soft and warm skin of his tummy, his little pebbled nipples. Jaehwan shivers and whines so prettily in Wonshik’s arms, so fragile in his hold; and for a moment, in the midst of the flurry of incoherent thoughts: Wonshik wishes that everything could just be as simple as this, no other complications involved. He wants it so badly, wants this feeling of pure bliss to last forever.
Wishful thinking, Wonshik knows.
Wonshik picks Jaehwan up, palms squeezing at Jaehwan’s ass; Jaehwan’s arms and limbs secured tight around Wonshik, whimpering and clinging onto Wonshik for dear life, like he’d never let go -- Wonshik’s heart aches, so badly. They enter Wonshik’s room: Wonshik drops Jaehwan off gently onto the sheets, carefully stripping Jaehwan, clothes gradually discarded onto the floor and there -- Jaehwan, laying bare on Wonshik’s sheets: cheeks flushed, the lines of his pale body so soft, so pretty.
Be mine, oh please, would you be mine?
Wonshik grunts as he leans down and takes Jaehwan’s soft cock whole into his mouth, groans at the desperate scratch of Jaehwan’s nails against his scalp, fingers pulled tight and needy into his hair -- Wonshik bobs up and down the length slowly, fuelled by Jaehwan’s needy, pitched mewls, cock hardening and warming up gradually in his mouth.
‘Fuck,’ Jaehwan gasps, wetly, brokenly, pulls Wonshik’s head off his cock -- bleary gaze trained onto the glistening pink of Wonshik’s lips. ‘Fuck me.’
The bottle of lube Wonshik usually uses for jacking off is grabbed hastily -- with rushed and barely coordinated movements, Wonshik gets a few pumps of lube drizzled all over his fingers, slick-drenched digits reaching between Jaehwan’s cheeks and pushing haphazardly into his body. Jaehwan sobs, thighs spreading so eagerly at the penetration, wanting more. Wonshik watches it all, dizzy, wet fingers scissoring, thrusting in and out of the amazing heat of Jaehwan’s body.
The preparation is done soon enough, neither of their minds fully functioning -- Jaehwan grabs at the insides of his pale thighs and spreads them, whimpering, creating a perfect space for Wonshik to fit in, to feed his cock into the slickness of his asshole. Slowly, so gently -- Wonshik finally sheathes himself in fully, hands braced onto the headboard, blood roaring in his ears at how deliciously hot and tight Jaehwan is inside.
Grunting, Wonshik takes a few shallow thrusts into Jaehwan’s body -- trying his best to control the force used, not wanting to cause any sort of hurt at all. But then there’s a trembling grip on the muscle of his arms, and Wonshik’s gaze flickers down to meet Jaehwan’s -- large eyes red-rimmed and glazed over with need, the intensity of the look in those blown orbs making Wonshik’s heart flutter when it really shouldn’t be, right now.
‘Harder,’ Jaehwan whines, calves circling around Wonshik’s hips to pull the bigger man in deeper -- the moan Wonshik lets out at this is embarrassingly loud, face heated with arousal. Hands moving down to grab at the sharp bone of Jaehwan’s hip, Wonshik bites his lip and pushes in, hips slapping loudly against Jaehwan’s skin, driving into Jaehwan’s body with more force -- hopefully satisfying the writhing body beneath.
‘Faster,’ Jaehwan whispers now, a mantra of breathless gasps escaping that perfect, swollen mouth when Wonshik, always so weak, increases his pace -- nails digging into Jaehwan’s skin, Wonshik’s hips and thighs aching with the strain of it all -- efforts rewarded with Jaehwan’s response: the way Jaehwan arches his back and cries out so prettily, nails raking down Wonshik’s back, ass squeezing so fucking tightly--
Wonshik’s orgasm rushes out of him way too quickly, he’s coming faster than he’d expected to -- hot load spilling into the small, shivering body beneath. Wonshik heaves as he circles fingers around a whining Jaehwan’s neglected length, stroking up and down, and then Jaehwan’s also coming: with a broken little sound, eyes clenching shut, thin spurts of milky fluid staining the smooth skin of his tummy, his chest.
Caught in the high and flurry of the moment -- Wonshik leans down, eyes heavy-lidded, focused only on the strawberry pink of Jaehwan’s glistening, parted mouth. Unsure of what he’s expecting, pushing his face against Jaehwan’s -- maybe, finally the feeling of those soft-looking lips pressed against his own --
But Jaehwan’s turning away before anything happens, head falling towards the opposite side.
The sounds of Jaehwan’s soft panting resounds in the dead quiet of the room.
Wonshik blinks slowly, and retreats -- pushing himself up and pulling out of Jaehwan carefully, not once a thought occurring to him that he should be cleaning up; entire being consumed with nothing but a feeling of emptiness. Wonshik tucks himself underneath the covers, hugging at his pillow -- a sour twinge in his nose, a watery sensation in his eyes.
There’s a small, burning feeling on the left side of his hip -- and Wonshik doesn’t dare to look.
//
‘About yesterday night,’ Wonshik bites his lip, blankly stirring the leftover cereal bits in his bowl around. ‘Was that… anything?’
Jaehwan doesn’t answer, for a while. Wonshik looks up, and understands the look of guilt in those wide eyes. A stab of pain in his chest.
‘I guess… it was just…’ Jaehwan’s pretty bottom lip worried between his teeth, leg shaking unconsciously. ‘--that.’
Ah.
‘Do you still… love him?’
Jaehwan stills. A long pause.
Wonshik feels bit after bit of his soul crumbling into nothingness, with each passing second.
The tattoo on Jaehwan’s wrist burns.
‘No.’
Voice soft, and lacking so much conviction.
Wonshik leaves it at that.
He doesn’t tell Jaehwan about the tattoo he’d just discovered, this very morning, on his left hip: a pretty, detailed rose -- in the centre of it a deep red, colour lightening gradually to a soft white at the petals’ edges.
//
-completely inspired by this post: http://shittyaus.tumblr.com/post/130050356474/spookymileskane-au-where-everyone-is-born-with
-basically, i quote: 'au where everyone is born with a very unique tattoo on their ankle, nobody else in the world has that tattoo.
every time you fall in love with someone, their tattoo appears somewhere else on your body. (not necessarily soulmates, just who you fall in love with.)'
-it wasn't supposed to end like this, but i paused here, and i thought it worked too, and i was like... why not.
Hakyeon’s gaze falls on Jaehwan as the younger slowly opens his folded slip. He chuckles at how naturally cute Jaehwan is -- squeezing his eyes shut upon unfolding the piece of paper, pink lips parting in a silent countdown before finally blinking open, eyes wide and unable to hold back his gasp at the name written on it.
Jung Taekwoon.
‘So hyung,’ Sanghyuk slings an arm across a smiling Hakyeon’s shoulder, ‘You must be happy, huh. Being entrusted with the planning of this year’s Secret Santa activity?’
‘Of course,’ Hakyeon grins, ‘I’m perfect for the job, you see. Responsible, outgoing, friendly-- ouch, what the hell!’
‘Stop with the bullshit,’ Sanghyuk laughs as he jokingly smacks Hakyeon over the head. ‘Our teacher just likes you, that’s all.’
The bright, angelic smile is back on Hakyeon’s face. ‘Yes, and the above mentioned character traits are precisely the reasons why.’
‘Stop lying to yourself,’ Sanghyuk rolls his eyes and playfully hits Hakyeon again. ‘Anyway. Since you’re in such a high position of power at the moment, I shall be nice to you. Please, don’t put me with someone I dislike.’
‘Sucking up to me only at such a time like this, huh.’ Hakyeon’s tone hardens as he glares at Sanghyuk. The stern expression quickly melts away into one of glee, though. ‘Then I’ll put you with your biggest crush! It’s Lee Hongbin, isn’t it--‘
‘Hey!’ Sanghyuk babbles, response impossibly quick as he reaches up to cover Hakyeon’s loud mouth, bringing the elder into a brutal headlock. ‘That one time I kissed him was purely by accident, I swear. Cha Hakyeon, you better not--‘
‘Fuck-- okay, okay I won’t, now stop smothering me to death, you guys wouldn’t want that--‘
‘I’d be perfectly fine, in all honesty.’ Sanghyuk finally releases his grip on a gasping Hakyeon’s neck, smiling angelically.
‘Asshole,’ Hakyeon rubs at his neck, before his gaze falls onto a dazed-looking Jaehwan, walking listlessly and unusually quiet beside the both of them. ‘Jaehwan, anything wrong?’
It takes a few taps on Jaehwan’s shoulder before the blonde finally snaps out of it, seemingly confused and surprised. ‘Oh? Sorry, I was thinking about something else.’
‘What?’ Sanghyuk inquires, but Jaehwan shakes his head and bites his lip sheepishly. ‘Nothing of your concern.’
‘Bet he’s got someone he wants to be paired up with in mind,’ Sanghyuk concludes and elbows Hakyeon, the two exchanging knowing, cheeky grins. Jaehwan is obviously flustered by their reactions, and tries to cover up quickly by denying it. But the three have known each other for way too long for Hakyeon and Sanghyuk not to realise that Jaehwan is, very obviously, lying.
‘Sorry to burst your bubble, Jaehwan, but the blush on your cheeks and your stuttering is totally giving it all away.’
‘W-Who says?’ It’s just--‘
‘It’s Taekwoon, isn’t it. Jung Taekwoon.’
Jaehwan’s expression at the sudden attack is priceless: eyes widening comically, mouth gaping open, the flush on his cheeks darkening even more with embarrassment at the exposure of what he thought to be a well-kept secret. Jaehwan sighs, bites his lip at the triumphant smiles blooming on both Hakyeon and Sanghyuk’s faces, their exchange of a gleeful hi-five.
‘How--‘
‘You’re cute, hyung, if you’ve been thinking all this while that your crush isn’t obvious.’ Sanghyuk slings an arm around a pouting Jaehwan’s shoulder, now, teasingly poking at his side. ‘Not obvious at all.’
Hakyeon grins, a spring to his step as he proceeds to Jaehwan’s free side and slings his own arm around a flushed Jaehwan as well. ‘Sanghyuk’s right, Jaehwan. Did you really think you weren’t obvious about your crush on that Jung Taekwoon guy? I mean, we’ve all caught you staring lovingly at that guy during class at least once a day. And how your disobedient ears perk up at every mention of--‘
‘Stop, stop, enough.’ Jaehwan hurriedly interrupts, cheeks impossibly hot, embarrassed about the sudden tea-spilling of his stupid crush-driven actions. Oh well. Guess it wasn’t a secret anymore. Or ever one to begin with.
‘I know who to put Jaehwan with, then.’
‘Hey, it’s supposed to be randomised, you cheater,’ Jaehwan stops and hits at Hakyeon’s chest. ‘Oh, why do I have literal devils for friends?’
(He wouldn’t mind, though, not at all.)
‘Yet another of my kind acts going unappreciated.’ Hakyeon sighs and wipes an imaginary tear from the corner of his eye. ‘Fine, fine! No rigging, I promise.’
(It’ll be nice to be Cupid this season, Hakyeon decides.)
═ ❄ ═
‘Class!’ Hakyeon claps twice as he stands in front of the room, and the attention is diverted to him quickly. ‘Before lessons start in a few minutes, I’d like you guys to look into your pencil cases!’
Hushed whispers of confusion start spreading amongst the class, and Hakyeon smiles as he watches the students look curiously into their pencil cases.
‘You’ll find a little folded slip of paper inside, which I painstakingly placed in each one of your cases during break. In it, contains the name of the classmate you’ll be getting the gift for!’
The students start finding and unfolding the little pieces of paper one-by-one, and the class is immediately filled with cries of excitement and surprise. Being the angel, and because he knew many of his classmates quite well, Hakyeon had slightly changed up some names here and there from the randomized list, to make sure no arch-enemies were put together or something. Though, that’d be quite interesting to watch, no lie.
Hakyeon’s gaze falls on Jaehwan as the younger slowly opens his folded slip. He chuckles at how naturally cute Jaehwan is -- squeezing his eyes shut upon unfolding the piece of paper, pink lips parting in a silent countdown before finally blinking open, eyes wide and unable to hold back his gasp at the name written on it.
Jung Taekwoon.
If Hakyeon had rigged it: Jaehwan doesn’t know whether to laugh or to cry, confused on whether to piss at and kick Hakyeon or embrace his friend in the tightest and warmest possible hug ever. And if Hakyeon hadn’t rigged it at all: there’s a warm, fluttery feeling inside his stomach, his heart pounding unusually fast -- then it must be Fate that so kindly decided on this outcome. Jaehwan squeezes his eyes shut and mutters out a word of thanks before looking over to Taekwoon. Taekwoon looks stunned, dark eyes blankly trained onto the piece of paper on his table. His lips are curled upwards so slightly, almost unnoticeably, a faint pink tinge on his cheeks -- it stirs an almost unsettling feeling of jealousy inside of Jaehwan: perhaps Taekwoon too, had a crush on someone else?
(Jaehwan prays hard that it isn’t the case.)
═ ❄ ═
‘Hey, Taekwoon.’
Taekwoon looks up from his desk, surprised to see Hakyeon and Sanghyuk standing in front, bright smiles on their faces. Jaehwan, standing somewhere behind them, seems to be sporting a look of pure horror.
‘Wanna join us and Jaehwan after school? We’ll be hanging out at the nearby café to warm ourselves up, and we can get to know each other better too!’
Yeah, sure, get to know each other better when the school term is closing in two months. Perhaps, one of them is in charge of buying the present for Taekwoon but absolutely clueless about what to get -- and so using this as an opportunity to probe more?
‘Uhm… Give me some time to consider--‘
‘We won’t bite, I swear. No need time to consider. With such great company, of course it’s a definite, immediate yes!’ Hakyeon exclaims, and gestures over to Jaehwan, who’s hiding behind, looking extremely flustered and it doesn’t take much for Taekwoon to tell that Jaehwan’s two friends had done this without his consent.
‘Our good friend Jaehwan here is really, really excited for our date-- I mean, hangout, and really hopes you can join us!’
Jaehwan gasps at this, and not-so-subtly smacks Hakyeon’s back quickly in some attempt to shut the elder up and save his own face -- Jaehwan almost wants to turn into a puff of smoke and disappear from the surface of Earth when he catches the curious glint in Taekwoon’s dark eyes, as if he’d taken Hakyeon’s words seriously.
A part of Taekwoon wants to spare Jaehwan the shame and refuse the offer, yet there’s another part of him that takes a slight liking to Jaehwan because of his unexplainable yet cute antics -- confident and loud when with his group of friends, yet always turning into a completely different person whenever Taekwoon encounters him: gaze flickering, speech soft and stuttered. This part of Taekwoon yearns to agree, just to see that pink flush on Jaehwan’s cheeks redden even more--
‘Well, okay.’ Jaehwan’s eyes widen impossibly beneath rounded glasses at Taekwoon’s keen response. ‘Sure. I’ll join you, then. I have no other company anyways.’
At this, Hakyeon and Sanghyuk both leap in excitement and it’s a wonder how synchronised the two are -- to the point it almost seems as if all of their movements are pre-coordinated. Taekwoon smiles to himself as Sanghyuk and Hakyeon both hi-five each other and giggle at a furiously flushed and babbling Jaehwan.
//
Jaehwan sighs and licks his lips as he walks towards the lockers where the four of them were supposed to meet, wetting them as he always does whenever he’s nervous, pulling his coat and scarf tighter around his body. Jaehwan stops and looks up through his mussed fringe to see only Taekwoon waiting -- hands shoved into the pockets of his long, dark coat, lips tugging up slightly at the corners and cheeks blushed from the chilly weather. He looks so pretty standing there and the dreamy gaze is back in Jaehwan’s eyes and, wait--
Where the hell were Hakyeon and Sanghyuk?
Jaehwan quickly fiddles for the phone in his pocket as he walks towards where Taekwoon’s waiting. When Taekwoon notices, he smiles and looks almost somewhat excited, or is that all in Jaehwan’s head?
‘Hi, Jaehwan.’
‘Oh, h-hey! You’re here already.’
‘Yeah, shall we go now?’
‘Wait, b-but,’ Jaehwan’s fishes out the phone from his pocket, ‘Hakyeon and Sanghyuk aren’t here yet, I’ll message them first.’
‘Oh. Right,’ Taekwoon rubs at his neck sheepishly, ‘Forgot for a split second.’
Jaehwan’s breath hitches in his throat as he hastily types out a message into their group chat. Taekwoon… Taekwoon forgot? He’d assumed it was just the two of them for a moment -- Jaehwan bites his lip, heart beating faster in his chest, both at the casual statement and also in anticipation and anxiety while waiting for those devils’ replies--
‘Fuck,’ Jaehwan curses and looks over to Taekwoon quickly, large eyes widening cutely before his hand flies up to cover his mouth, ‘Oops.’
‘It’s alright,’ Taekwoon chuckles and the look in his eyes is so warm, ‘So, where are those two friends of yours?’
‘Hey Jaehwan, we’ve got something urgent to attend to so we can’t make it, unfortunately :)’
‘Have fun, Jaehwan.’
‘Don’t miss us too much!’
‘Why would he miss us, Sanghyuk-ah, when he’s alone with the guy of his dreams?’
‘You’re right. Wishful thinking on my part’
‘Well, err-- Hakyeon said he and Sanghyuk had to settle something important that cropped up all of a sudden and-- won’t be able to make it today,’ Jaehwan sighs as he furiously types out a reply in the group chat.
‘Fuck you guys.’
‘You’ll thank us later :)’
‘Ohh, okay,’ Taekwoon looks over and notices the look of fury in Jaehwan’s eyes, his bitten lip, the pads of his fingers moving quickly over the on-screen keyboard. ‘Is… everything okay?’
‘Oh?’ Jaehwan looks up and blushes when he sees the concern on Taekwoon’s face. God, hopefully Taekwoon didn’t peep at their chat or something and found out the true reason behind those devils’ absence and about his crush -- Jaehwan makes a mental note to cancel their years of friendship tomorrow.
‘Y-Yeah, sure! Don’t worry too much. Umm-- let’s go?’
═ ❄ ═
‘Woah, didn’t know this was such a popular place amongst our schoolmates,’ Taekwoon wonders aloud, a look of adorable awe on his face as they enter the little café: it’s got a really welcoming atmosphere, it’s really warm inside and hence serves as a great escape from the chilly weather -- little tables scattered over and accompanied with padded, comfortable chairs. The place is filled with students of all ages from their school, a considerably long line at the counter, bags and belongings carelessly strewn across the tables and seats to mark their territories.
‘Yeah! Is… is this your first time here?’
‘Yeah,’ Taekwoon smiles, ‘I usually head back right after lessons end.’
‘Oh, is that so?’ Jaehwan walks around the café, keen eyes desperately looking for an empty table somewhere and there, finally: Jaehwan claps his hands in glee when he spots it, immediately quickening his steps towards it -- an unoccupied, small round table, right at the corner of the café. ‘Thank goodness we found a place! As you can see, it’s a really popular café and gets really crowded at times, especially during the winter.’ Jaehwan smiles, and slings his bag onto the chair. ‘Like, right now.’
‘Yeah, that’s great,’ Taekwoon laughs, ‘I wouldn’t have spotted this table. You’re really observant.’
‘Nah.. It’s nothing much, I’m pretty used to it,’ Jaehwan bites his lip, the corners of his lips itching to break out into a shy smile. ‘Let’s go order?’
‘Yeah, we better head there quick. Gosh, that queue.’
//
‘Do you and your friends often hang out here after school?’
‘Yeah, we do.’ Jaehwan pushes his hands into the pockets of his coat, happy that Taekwoon had initiated the conversation. ‘It’s almost kind of like a secret hideout, for the three of us,’ Jaehwan’s eyes shining when Taekwoon chuckles at his statement, amused. ‘We come here to rest and chat and during exam periods, to study. The food here is amazingly good and the café has such a homely atmosphere; the staff are really nice as well and some even know our names and recognise our faces!’
‘Wow, by any chance, has the café sponsored you or something?’ Taekwoon jokes, pleased at the flush on Jaehwan’s cheeks. ‘If they haven’t, they really should. I must say I am absolutely convinced already, of the greatness of this café.’
Jaehwan only smiles weakly, heart fluttering in his chest and he almost forgets he’s in a queue for a moment, before snapping out of his daze and hastily moving in front.
‘The staff is pretty efficient, I must say. We’re almost at the front of the queue already!’ Taekwoon smiles and scans over the menu hanging over the counter -- the aesthetics of the café are really pretty: the menu painstakingly handwritten in white chalk onto a clean, black chalkboard, with little cute drawings and decorations along the borders. ‘Since you’re a regular here, you must have some recommendations?’
‘Yeah, s-sure!’ Jaehwan takes a teeny step closer to Taekwoon and pretends to scan over the menu he knows all too well by now. ‘Umm… I think you should try their lava cakes! They’re my personal favourite from this café, besides, this café is really well known for them too!’
‘Oh, is that true?’ Taekwoon grins at Jaehwan, ‘I shall take your recommendation then!’
In a short while, the two of them finish placing their orders -- Jaehwan, a cup of hot chocolate and a chocolate lava cake; and Taekwoon, a cup of hot latte and a matcha lava cake, supposedly the café’s popular choice.
‘Oh? Your order is here already,’ Jaehwan looks at Taekwoon and gestures to his tray. ‘You could… go and settle down first?’
‘It’s okay, a little waiting won’t hurt,’ Taekwoon’s lips are curling up, eyes crinkling into little pretty crescents and Jaehwan’s heart nearly stops. He recovers quickly, though, thankfully, when his tray arrives. Jaehwan sighs as he picks up the tray, smiles weakly at Taekwoon.
‘You’re really a big fan of chocolate, huh.’ Taekwoon laughs as they put their trays down onto the table, ‘Chocolate drink, chocolate dessert.’
‘Yeah, I guess you could say that,’ Jaehwan laughs nervously at all of the sudden attention from Taekwoon. God, this is such a great idea and such a horrible one at the same time. It’s an awesome setting for a cute little date -- it’ll be perfect, if only Jaehwan doesn’t feel like his heart is making attempts to leap out of his chest each time Taekwoon does something that makes him fall a little more in love.
Which honestly is, practically everything.
//
‘You weren’t kidding with your praise about this café, I see,’ Taekwoon’s eyes widen with amazement when he takes a bite into the matcha lava cake, eyes falling shut in bliss as he savours the cake, sighing with contentment. ‘It’s delicious.’
‘Of course!’ Jaehwan starts, then immediately blushes at his unintended outburst, which Taekwoon chuckles at. ‘I mean, yeah sure! Their stuff is great.’ Jaehwan bites his lip as he pushes a fork through his own chocolate lava cake, satisfied at the way the warm and thick substance oozes out, its sweet smell already filling Jaehwan’s senses. Jaehwan makes a cute noise of contentment as he chews at his cake.
The way Jaehwan acts just really makes you want to… dote on him, somehow, Taekwoon thinks. He’s not felt this feeling in a pretty long time, the only times being when he meets children or small animals. Taekwoon smiles and scoops another bite of cake into his mouth, making sure to dip it into the warm matcha filling, warmth spreading in his chest.
'Hakyeon said this meetup was so as to get to know me better,' Taekwoon chuckles, and takes a sip of his latte, nods with contentment at the rich taste. 'Funny when there's only like, two months left till we graduate.'
Jaehwan's still munching happily on his cake, cheeks bulging at the sides -- he's obviously taken aback when Taekwoon suddenly speaks, eyes wide as he quickens his chewing, makes some flustered gestures for Taekwoon to wait while he swallows. Cute.
'Ahh,' Jaehwan says when his mouth is finally cleared, embarrassed. 'You know how Hakyeon is, he thinks of himself as... very sociable and well-liked by all,' Jaehwan scoffs good-heartedly and Taekwoon grins. 'Probably listing down the people he's rarely talked to and taking the rest of the year to... forge the maximum number of friendships possible.'
'Oh, that's... nice,' Taekwoon says, amused. He looks up and makes eye contact with a wide eyed Jaehwan, gesturing towards him.
'What about you? We've not talked much this year... I must really have a sixth sense or something,' Taekwoon chuckles, 'I always seem to catch you looking over to my seat?'
'Uhhh, I-I,' Jaehwan blabbers, shocked at the sudden question and absolutely clueless on what to say. Was Taekwoon having fun, teasing him? Maybe he’s completely aware of Jaehwan's crush all this while and Hakyeon and Sanghyuk were right about it not being a secret after all? Jaehwan bites his lip, if only he could just, dig a hole in the ground and bury himself in it to save himself the need to answer -- Jaehwan looks over to Taekwoon and there’s a bright, expectant look in his eyes.
'I... I've always wanted to initiate some kind of conversation with you to umm, get to know you better but just never... found the right time to? Also,' Jaehwan takes a sip of comforting hot chocolate to calm his nerves, 'You rarely speak in class which might come off a little... intimidating sometimes?' Jaehwan curses at himself mentally, that's totally not the right thing to say. 'But I mean, I'm completely cool with it! I kinda... like it? That you're not extremely open to everyone... I guess?'
The embarrassed look in those wide eyes and the pretty pink flush staining Jaehwan’s entire face as well as the tips of his ears is enough to have Taekwoon’s chest filling with that nice, warm feeling again.
‘I’m glad you like that,’ Taekwoon takes another sip of his latte, smiling. ‘Many think I’m unapproachable at first, but you’ll see that I open up pretty easily the moment you get to know me or initiate any sort of conversation with me. I’m pretty much just like everyone else.’
‘Yeah, it’s a huge relief,’ Jaehwan laughs weakly, scooping up a piece of cake into his mouth. ‘I could tell, from how much more you spoke than I expected. Which is great!’
‘Glad we could have this little chat to clear some doubts and warm up to each other.’ Taekwoon brings the little ceramic cup to his lips, savouring the last bit of latte inside. ‘So now you know, really just, feel free to talk to me anytime. No need for reservations too,’ Taekwoon beams.
‘S-Sure, I’m glad Hakyeon and Sanghyuk couldn’t make it-- shit, I mean-- um, I’m glad we could spend some… um, personal time with each other?’ Jaehwan also drinks up the last bit of hot chocolate, in desperate hopes of the cup hiding the heat in his cheeks. ‘God I’m so sorry, I don’t really think much before saying stuff, would you please just… try to unhear that--’
‘It’s fine,’ Taekwoon chuckles, ‘You’re quite cute, you know.’
‘Me? Ahh… I’m honestly just really dumb but thank you for the kind compliment? You’re too nice, Taekwoon.’
God, could Taekwoon just stop right now, Jaehwan thinks, eyes clenching shut -- he’s doing and saying all sorts of things to make his heart do all sorts of unusual flips in his chest, swarms of butterflies furiously fluttering in the pits of his stomach. Taekwoon definitely knows about his crush by now, if he hadn’t previously. And it almost seems as if he’s somewhat enjoying Jaehwan’s reactions towards his teasing, the flustered replies and the inevitable pinkening of cheeks. This is all too much, too much--
Jaehwan blinks open right away when he feels a warm, gentle touch to his cheek, the corner of his mouth -- he nearly gasps when he sees Taekwoon leaning over, a concentrated and amused look in his dark eyes as he works at swiping a napkin carefully over the stain of chocolate at the corner of Jaehwan’s (soft) pink lips. It’s almost as if that single moment had been in slow-motion in Jaehwan’s time, it feels like an eternity before Taekwoon finally pulls away -- Jaehwan releasing the long breath he didn’t realise he’d been holding all that time. Taekwoon’s eyes are crinkling up again with a bright smile, adorable wrinkles of skin framing the corners of those dark crescents, and Jaehwan’s heart skips a beat. (once again.)
‘Just wanted to clean up some of that chocolate staining your cheek,’ Taekwoon clarifies, and notices how the dazed look is back in Jaehwan’s large eyes. ‘Since we’re pretty much finished, shall we head off?’
‘Alright, I shall check the timings for my bus arrival first,’ Jaehwan hastily fishes out the phone from his pocket, ‘And… you, Taekwoon? How would you be going home?’
‘My place isn’t too far from here -- well, walking distance is bearable, at least,’ Taekwoon laughs. ‘It’s nice, taking a break from hectic life and just basking in the beauty of nature.’
‘Oh, that’s really nice! Maybe I should try that out one day, too.’
‘You really should, I promise it’ll be worth it!’
‘Oh--‘ A look of worry flashes across Jaehwan’s face as he scans over the screen of his phone, sighing heavily. ‘Dang it. The bus currently on the run had just broken down halfway and the next service will take at least an hour more to arrive. Just my luck.’
‘Maybe it’s the heavens telling you to take a walk back today?’ Taekwoon looks at Jaehwan seriously for a good moment before his expression breaks into a smile. ‘Just kidding, but I mean… It’s an option to consider!’
‘Well,’ Jaehwan sighs and slips the phone back into his pocket, trying his best to maintain a calm and cool expression on his face so as not to give it away that he’s completely excited, ‘I ahh, guess you’re right!’
‘Great.’ Taekwoon grins. ‘Put your coat and scarf back on first, though. The weather has been pretty unforgiving lately. Don’t want to be catching a cold now, do we?’
═ ❄ ═
‘Never knew you lived in the same neighbourhood too!’ Jaehwan chirps, shuffling up to catch up with Taekwoon.
The weather is indeed pretty chilly, Jaehwan sniffs as he grabs the ends of his fluffy scarf to wrap it tighter around his neck, as well as to shield his sensitive ears -- but it’s definitely worth it, Jaehwan thinks, as he looks around and admires the scenery that he’s honestly not cared much about when in the bus, tapping away at a game on his phone. It’s snowed quite a bit the last night, boots trudging through a layer of soft clean snow blanketing the sidewalk. There are a good variety of tree types adorning the pathways -- spruces, sycamores, figs: the needle-like leaves of the evergreens as well as the bare branches of the other trees, coated beautifully with a perfect smattering of pure white. There are a good number of birds around, too: each of them coloured so beautifully and uniquely, cute rounded bodies and sharp beaks -- perched on snow-drenched branches or flying around from tree to tree, exploring the place eagerly. A few snowmen are spotted too -- surrounded by little kids bundled up in thick padded clothing and their happy parents, proud at their little works of art.
‘Yeah. Pretty much all the students who don’t live in the school dormitories live around here, in this neighbourhood,’ Taekwoon smiles, pleased at the look of pure awe on Jaehwan’s face. He’s cute, soft little gasps escaping cold-chapped lips, face half buried into his scarf -- almost looking like a child in an amusement park for the very first time.
‘That makes sense,’ Jaehwan giggles, sound muffled. ‘God,’ Jaehwan sniffs, clasps his shivering hands together and rubs them together, desperately trying to generate some body heat to save this particular body part that’s incredibly numbed and feels almost as if it’s about to freeze and fall off any moment. ‘Would have brought some heat packs and cotton gloves, if I knew I was going to walk home like this.’ Jaehwan looks up at Taekwoon, who’s looking concerned. Well, at least Jaehwan now has a feasible excuse for his flushed cheeks. ‘It’s okay, I get cold easily,’ he explains.
A warm hand touches and holds Jaehwan’s ones, suddenly -- Jaehwan bites his lip when he looks over to see Taekwoon’s pale, larger hands clasping and cupping his own freezing ones, in some attempt to help Jaehwan warm up. There’s that same fluttery feeling in his stomach, and Jaehwan almost trips over his own feet to fall flat into the snow -- but is held steady by Taekwoon’s strong grip. Jaehwan looks up and smiles weakly to see Taekwoon returning that same, affectionate smile and now, not just his hands but his entire body is starting to warm up in an unusual way as well -- not because of Taekwoon’s hand holding his, but because of Taekwoon’s hand holding his. Before he knows it, Jaehwan’s mind starts wandering off to nice, fluffy places again: like thinking up cute dates and scenarios where couples walk together, hand in hand in the cold weather, bodies and hearts warmed with love.
‘I’m not too sensitive to the cold, so my hands are still pretty warm,’ Taekwoon interlocks their fingers together, beaming. ‘Hopefully it’ll help a little? Gosh, your hands are freezing. There’s a convenience store nearby, I could walk over to get some heat packs if you--‘
‘No-- no need for that! I like this-- I mean, I don’t want to trouble you, you know.’ Jaehwan clenches his eyes shut and swears at himself for his stupidity and uncooperative mouth. His hand shifts in Taekwoon’s grip, ‘Besides, I think this-- your hand um, holding mine, is… pretty effective. I mean, my hands definitely don’t feel like they’re about to freeze off anytime anymore, as they were just now.’
‘Okay,’ Taekwoon chuckles, filled with affection at the constant blinking of Jaehwan’s large eyes and the way the tips of his ears and long nose are reddened with the cold. ‘Ahh, I feel bad for asking you to walk home, didn’t know you’d be so affected by the cold. Really sorry, Jaehwan.’
‘No, it’s really okay!’ Jaehwan quickly speaks, ‘It was… more of my fault, for agreeing with it even when I knew too well about my sensitivity.’
‘Make sure to bring along some heat packs, for the next time we do this again!’
Jaehwan blinks slowly. Did he hear that right? Did Taekwoon really say again? And the way he’d said it so naturally, like it was an automatic assumption--
‘S-Sure! I will, definitely.’
(Though it’d be nice to let the heat packs slip my mind sometimes, Jaehwan thinks, just so Taekwoon would do this again…)
‘Oh look!’ Taekwoon suddenly exclaims, eyes shining as he gestures towards somewhere further up on the street. ‘It’s Coffee!’ Taekwoon tugs on a surprised and confused Jaehwan’s hand, smiling. ‘Let’s walk faster, you see up there? That’s my elderly neighbour walking her Corgi puppy, Coffee!’
‘Oh?’ Jaehwan finally looks ahead to see a grey-haired old lady, back slightly bent, donned in a fluffy purple coat -- an adorable, loving toothless smile on her face. Jaehwan smiles, and melts when his gaze falls on the little coffee-coloured puppy on the leash -- little padded shoes on his little feet, itself wrapped in a clearly handmade, knitted sweater, tail wagging excitedly and barking with high little sounds.
The two finally meet up close with the old lady and her puppy.
‘Hi Mrs Kim!’ Taekwoon beams and bows down respectfully, Jaehwan following after.
‘--and hello Coffee!’ Taekwoon bends and squats down to pat and scratch under the excited puppy’s head, his voice automatically switching to one kindergarten teachers would use with their children, the puppy whining cutely and nuzzling it’s soft body against Taekwoon’s palm.
Jaehwan also squats down, filled with adoration for this little puppy. Jaehwan giggles when Taekwoon passes the puppy over -- laughing breathily as he pets and runs his fingers through its amazingly soft and well groomed fur, melts at how the puppy’s eyes are closed into little curved lines of pure happiness, all kinds of sounds of contentment escaping its little mouth.
‘Coffee,’ Jaehwan says, and the puppy’s ears perk up in excitement at the sound of his name. ‘You’re so cute, Coffee, so cute!’ Jaehwan scratches playfully behind the puppy’s ears and giggles when it wriggles, soft body squirming around with excitement.
‘You must like dogs very much, Jaehwan.’
Jaehwan looks up to see Taekwoon, blushes at the amused look across his handsome face. ‘Yeah, and I didn’t know you did too!’
‘One thing you should know, Jaehwan,’ Taekwoon chuckles as he pets at Coffee’s head, ‘I have a really soft spot for little kids and animals.’
(And maybe you, Jaehwan.)
‘Ohh, never would’ve imagined! It’s honestly hard to believe how friendly and soft inside you are in reality, with how stoic you always seem to be.’
‘I guess I should start smiling more in school, perhaps the reason why I don’t have many friends is because of that--‘
‘No-- It’s completely fine, being the way you are right now, I mean. You don’t have to change yourself just to fit within others’ expectations. I really like how genuine you are.’ Jaehwan feels his cheeks heating up, ‘It’s… it’s nice to find people like that.’
‘That’s really nice of you to say, Jaehwan.’ Jaehwan looks up slowly to Taekwoon, and is that a shy smile on his face right now, or is that all in Jaehwan’s head?
‘Anyway, back to dogs,’ Taekwoon suddenly interrupts, laughing, perhaps after catching himself off guard with the feelings that suddenly consumed him upon Jaehwan’s kind words. ‘Um, what’s your favourite breed of dogs? Mine are definitely Corgis, but I think Shih Tzus and Chihuahuas are really cute too.’
‘Oh? Corgis are my favourite breed of dogs too! They’re just adorable, long bodies and disproportionately short but cute legs.’ Jaehwan chirps, smiling at the way Coffee barks, as if he’d understood the praise. ‘Also, maybe because I’ve been--‘ Jaehwan hesitates, voice dying down. Shit, why’d he even think to say that? Hopefully Taekwoon hadn’t heard--
‘You’ve been?’
God, Jaehwan makes a mental note to train himself to think carefully before saying things he’s going to regret a second later.
‘I’ve ahh, been told by others that I resemble a Corgi?’ Jaehwan groans into his hands, before looking up at Taekwoon again, ‘I shouldn’t have said that, I’m--‘
‘Hey, you do look like one!’ Taekwoon laughs and Jaehwan thinks that the heat radiating off his cheeks might be enough to melt snow, by now.
‘I think it’s your eyes, they’re really large and just… puppy like?’ Taekwoon smiles. ‘Corgis are really cute.’
(Like you, Jaehwan.)
The two are suddenly interrupted by the lady, Mrs Kim, clearing her throat from above.
‘I see you’ve got a friend with you this time, Taekwoon-ah. If my ears have not failed me yet, is his name Jaehwan?’
‘Yeah it is!’
‘Ah, what a pretty name,’ Mrs Kim smiles kindly at Jaehwan. ‘A really handsome boy too. You’re both really handsome young men!’
‘Ahh, you’re too kind, Mrs Kim.’
‘You guys seem to be really close,’ Mrs Kim says, ‘I’m guessing you’ve been good friends for a long time?’
‘No, actually… we’re classmates but we just started talking and getting to know each other today.’
‘Oh, is that so? I never would’ve guessed! It must be fate, then, you two seem to be hitting it off so well already.’ Mrs Kim gives a sweet, toothless smile again, ‘You two look great together.’
There’s the subtlest blush creeping up on both their faces at this -- pretty pink staining pale cheeks; and it’s not the work of the cold weather. Mrs Kim probably didn’t mean it that way, but--
The two of them respond with thanks at the same time, breaths hitched and hearts fluttering -- the weather doesn’t even seem all that chilly now.
//
‘Oh? We’ve reached my house already.’ Jaehwan says, pulling his scarf down to speak clearly. ‘Thanks for keeping me company all this time, Taekwoon.’
‘No worries at all, your place is on the way anyway. It’s a really short walk from here to my house.’
‘Still, thank you so much for the nice chat and walk! If not for you, I wouldn’t have thought to take time out to appreciate the breath-taking scenery. Especially now when everything’s so pretty, with the snow and all.’
‘Well, I’m glad you didn’t think it was boring,’ Taekwoon smiles, and squeezes Jaehwan’s hand in his ones. ‘I realised we haven’t exchanged numbers yet, since we haven’t done any projects together this year.’ Taekwoon shuffles for the phone in his pocket, a look of sincerity in his eyes as he hands the phone over.
‘Oh… right!’ Jaehwan’s heart races as he takes out his own phone and unlocks it before passing it over for Taekwoon to add his contact. The exchange of numbers is done in a few seconds, both handing the phones back to their respective owners with small smiles.
‘Bye, Taekwoon.’
‘See you tomorrow.’
Taekwoon waves Jaehwan off happily, before walking off slowly, frame broad and tall, enhanced especially with the long, black coat he’s wearing -- gorgeous against the backdrop of clusters of snow-drenched trees.
Just one day, and Jaehwan’s already found out so much more about Taekwoon than he’d ever hoped for, which is amazing. Jaehwan’s also starting to think the feelings between him and Taekwoon might not be that one-sided on his part, after all. Perhaps it’s just Jaehwan’s ever-wandering mind making things up to suit his desired outcome -- he sure hopes not.
(It’s not.)
There’s still a lingering worry and uncertainty of what to get Taekwoon for the Secret Santa activity, though.
═ ❄ ═
‘So you’re the reason as to why Jaehwan’s been skipping lunches with us lately.’
Jaehwan’s ears perk up at the familiar voice trailing from above, a feeling of pure dread encompassing his entire being as he looks up slowly -- Hakyeon and Sanghyuk, with food trays in their hands and sweet yet devilish smiles on their faces. Jaehwan looks over to Taekwoon, his expression undecipherable, perhaps one of amusement.
‘May we join the two of you?’
‘Sure,’ Taekwoon says, and Jaehwan mutters out a curse, sound muffled by the food in his mouth.
‘What was that, Jaehwan?’
‘A cry of excitement because I’m so terribly excited to see you guys,’ Jaehwan deadpans, his heart swelling a little at the soft chuckle Taekwoon lets out beside him.
‘I don’t think Jaehwan likes the idea of us joining them, Sanghyuk-ah.’ Hakyeon sighs and grabs his tray. ‘Let’s not interrupt their personal time together, shall we? Look at that glare Jaehwan’s giving us!’
‘No, who says? I’m perfectly alright with your company!’ Jaehwan quickly grabs at Hakyeon’s wrist, expression breaking into an elated one, bright smile on his face; but in contrast, nails tightening and biting into the skin of Hakyeon’s wrist in some sort of warning. ‘Come on, join us.’
Jaehwan smiles weakly at Taekwoon when Sanghyuk and Hakyeon finally settle down, then looks back at the two cheeky faces sitting across him, exchanging knowing looks amongst themselves. They start grinning: looking from Taekwoon to Jaehwan to Taekwoon again and not-so-subtly implying something between the two of them. Jaehwan clenches his teeth, desperately hoping that Taekwoon doesn’t take them seriously. Those devils better not say anything stupid and screw it all up--
‘So Jaehwan,’ Sanghyuk starts first, sipping sweetly at his drink, and Jaehwan’s fists clench involuntarily under the table with anxiety. He’s got to think of some way to escape this situation quickly -- or else every word coming out of his two friends’ mouths is sooner or later going to drive him into a heart attack or an embarrassing mental breakdown. ‘Your reason for choosing Taekwoon over us?’
‘Well,’ Jaehwan looks at Sanghyuk intently as he thinks of a good answer, trying his best to shoot out as many invisible daggers as possible from his large eyes, ‘Taekwoon’s a million times nicer than the both of you, for one thing.’
‘Oooh,’ the two of them coo at the same time, looking at each other mischievously, purposely dragging out their sound effect for the maximum impact on Jaehwan. It sure does the trick -- Jaehwan’s cheeks heat up impossibly fast at this, he’d melt into a puddle on the floor right now if he could. ‘Jaehwan, are you sure it’s just because he’s nicer that you’re hanging out with him more?’ Sanghyuk chuckles, an annoying glint in his eyes. ‘Not because of like, a crush, or anything?’
At this, Jaehwan bites his lip and nearly rises out of his seat in a rash attempt to drag the both of them somewhere else to teach them a lesson -- before there’s a warm, comforting squeeze to his shoulder. Jaehwan looks over, wide-eyed -- Taekwoon’s smiling warmly, arm casually slung across Jaehwan’s shoulder. Hakyeon and Sanghyuk’s eyes widen comically at the sudden, unexpected initiation of skinship, mouths agape.
‘I think it’s time you two to stop teasing your dear friend right here,’ Taekwoon says. ‘We just became really good friends, on that day you guys disappeared after planning a meet-up at the café and left us both together.’
‘Y-Yeah, I mean, yeah,’ Jaehwan adds in, speech stuttered and cheeks flushed -- not from anger but rather, more from the heart-fluttering warm touch, that’s still lingering on his shoulder. ‘You guys think too much into things.’
Taekwoon sips up the last bit of drink in his disposable cup and picks his tray up, taps on Jaehwan’s shoulder and gestures for him to get up as well.
‘I think Jaehwan and I shall make a move first, since we started eating earlier and have finished our meal already,’ Taekwoon smiles as he looks at the two boys sitting opposite. ‘We have somewhere to go.’
//
‘Wait, what?’ Jaehwan chirps, heart racing in his chest when Taekwoon drags them out of the cafeteria towards somewhere still unknown to Jaehwan -- his grip firm around Jaehwan’s wrist. Jaehwan bites his lip somewhat excitedly as he simply follows along, completely trusting and extremely curious as well. ‘What’s this about? You didn’t tell me anything?’
Taekwoon finally stops them in front of one of their school’s many recital rooms, grins at Jaehwan as he fumbles for something in his pocket and finally takes out a polished metal key. ‘Remember I told you about how I play the piano and how I’m really interested in composing?’ Taekwoon fits the key into the lock and twists, door opening with a satisfying click.
Jaehwan nods, eyes shining and full of anticipation.
‘You seemed really excited when I told you about it and I still remember you telling me that you had to be the first person to listen to my first composition, so. I booked this room to show it to you.’ Taekwoon steps into the room and flicks the light switch on, pleased at the genuine look of excitement on Jaehwan’s adorable face. ‘I finally perfected my first ever composition yesterday.’
‘Wow,’ Jaehwan whispers, ‘I’m so touched, like… I never expected you to take me seriously but you did?’
‘Of course, I take everything you say seriously.’
Jaehwan falls a little more in love, each time.
Taekwoon proceeds to the grand piano placed in the corner of the small, soundproofed room. He almost gasps at the beauty of it as he runs his fingers carefully across the hard surface -- the piano’s exterior a sleek, pure black; polished and shining effortlessly with extreme maintenance. The cover is carefully lifted up, before Taekwoon sighs and sits down in its accompanied, cushioned seat. Taekwoon looks over his shoulder to Jaehwan who’s still standing behind, cheeks a pretty pink and fingers nervously twiddling around.
‘Come, join me.’ Taekwoon shifts a little in the plush seat, the sitting area generous enough to fit two people. Just perfect. Taekwoon pats softly at the cleared space and smiles. Jaehwan bites his lip, legs wobbly and it’s a miracle he doesn’t trip over his own feet before reaching the piano. Jaehwan smiles weakly at Taekwoon before sitting down, cheeks heating up once again at the sudden proximity between them, due to the need for the both of them to fit into a single chair. This is so, so much, it’s overwhelming--
‘Honestly, I’m really nervous right now, my first time and all.’ Taekwoon laughs softly and places his long, pretty fingers on the starting notes of his composition, and looks over to Jaehwan. Jaehwan doesn’t even know why he’s so nervous, he’s not the one showing off a composition for the first time, there is absolutely no need for his stomach to be flipping and fluttering so much right now. Jaehwan quickly smiles, though, and pats shyly at Taekwoon’s back in some attempt to calm his nerves, skin tingling at the touch.
‘Don’t worry at all, I’m sure it’ll be amazing!’
Taekwoon nods at Jaehwan, taking in a deep breath and releasing a long-drawn sigh, before finally starting.
The beginning is soft and sweet sounding -- Jaehwan watches, breath caught in his throat as Taekwoon’s fingers move slowly, chords changing and complementing each other perfectly. There’s a new, charming glint of focus and passion in Taekwoon’s dark gaze, as he so carefully controls the strength in his fingers, eyes falling shut occasionally as he slowly immerses himself into this single moment, soaking in the emotions and feelings of his very composition. The song slowly progresses into the chorus -- the sound of it is absolutely beautiful, familiar like the tunes of various well-known sweet songs and yet, there’s a fresh uniqueness to it that only Taekwoon can give. Jaehwan watches, lips parted in an unsounded gasp and completely enthralled, as Taekwoon’s pale, long fingers flutter so beautifully elegantly over the piano keys, in its wake a lovely tune filling the small room. In this moment, with just the two of them in a room filled with such pretty music -- Jaehwan feels at the prime of his life, incomprehensible waves of intertwined emotions coursing throughout his body. The song slows once again as it nears its end -- similar to how it started, soft and sweet, and then it ends with a perfectly executed, breath-taking arpeggiation.
(In this moment, completely overwhelmed with emotion: it’s almost as if Jaehwan had had imaginary chains holding him back before, but they’ve just suddenly been broken, somehow -- he feels free, uninhibited, and there’s a sudden yearning in him to want to spill his heart out and just confess his feelings for Taekwoon.)
There’s a period of silence in the room when the piece ends. It’s filled with lingering emotions from the composition, and everything but feelings of awkwardness. Jaehwan is first to break the silence when he lets out the breath he’d held during the song, hands coming together in an applause for Taekwoon’s wonderful performance.
‘You did so well, I can’t even express how amazingly you played. Your composition was absolutely gorgeous, too.’
Jaehwan looks over genuinely and Taekwoon smiles, cherry lips curled up in a bashful way, almost; before there’s a soft whisper of thanks.
Suddenly, Jaehwan places his fingers on the piano too, and he looks over to see a glint of curiosity in Taekwoon’s widened eyes. ‘C-Can I try playing a song too?’
‘Sure, why not?’ Taekwoon responds excitedly, ‘I knew you sang, but you never told me you played the piano too!’
‘Well, my skills are nothing compared to yours, please don’t expect too much,’ Jaehwan laughs weakly, positioning his fingers on the starting notes. ‘I started learning how to play the piano many years ago, but dropped it halfway because preparing for the examinations was too stressful for me.’
Jaehwan looks over to see Taekwoon giving him a firm look of assurance, and lets out a shaky breath. ‘I’m just going to try playing um-- one of my favourite songs.’
Hopefully, this song will be able to convey my feelings.
The starting is shaky, skills rusty -- Jaehwan bites his lip as his fingers fumble and slip occasionally onto flat-sounding keys -- and then suddenly, there’s that same comforting squeeze to his shoulder again, one of assurance. Soon, Jaehwan feels a new rekindling of passion inside of him, the notes and the familiarity of touch getting to Jaehwan as the chords are better played and the melody now clearer. When the song nears the end of the first verse, Jaehwan hears a soft gasp beside him, as if Taekwoon had recognised the song. Jaehwan takes a deep breath as the song transitions into the chorus -- soft lips parting as he begins to sing:
I open the doors to heaven, led by you
Walking on an unknown path
When the doors of heaven are open, will I meet you?
My answer, I want to find my real answer
Jaehwan’s rich voice echoes beautifully loud and clear in the small recital room -- already well-known for being the star of the school choir, his voice a perfect balance between smooth and husky, flowing like the thickest, sweetest honey and an absolute blessing to a shining-eyed Taekwoon’s ears. The quality of his voice definitely makes up for any lack of skill in his piano-playing, if there was any lack in the first place. Taekwoon feels his body filling with that same comforting warmth, which only ever happens whenever Jaehwan’s around. As the chorus ends, Taekwoon’s slowly flutter shut -- and to Jaehwan’s surprise, starts to join in the second verse:
It’s a long way to you but I love the journey
Fluttering excitement and
nervousness strangely mix together
There’s no same way, what kind of me will I see?
I’ll figure it out if I go however it spreads out,
however it is
This trembling is met after wandering for a long time
It’s a coziness that’s like a dream and once again
It’s a miracle Jaehwan doesn’t stop singing and playing the moment he hears a voice join his -- soft and breathy and a perfect complement to his own, singing a tune of a higher pitch, in a perfect harmony with Jaehwan. Jaehwan’s fingers stumble a little at the start, voice faltering -- but he quickly recovers, cheeks heating up and heart thumping in excitement. The both of them are now singing freely, in their own shared place, voices blending so amazingly it’d take a second listen to figure out there isn’t just one person singing -- the song finally proceeds to its bridge and ending verse.
When I stand at the end of this road,
when I stand right next to you
Can I look forward to a me who is a bit more mature?
Being in a world with you
how would it feel?
Once again, I see the light of heaven, it pulls me in
Walking on an unknown path
When the doors of heaven are open, will I meet you?
My answer, I want to find my real answer
There’s the sound of Taekwoon’s soft clapping immediately after the song ends -- Jaehwan smiles shyly as he releases a long, nervous breath, trembling fingers removing themselves from the piano and placing in his lap, fiddling with the material of his pants at the glorious moment they’d just shared.
‘You played and sung amazingly, Jaehwan.’
‘Well-- it was nothing compared to you but thanks! And you, sure I didn’t tell you I could play the piano but you never told me you could sing too! I’m surprised you knew the lyrics, and your voice sounded great.’
‘That song is actually a personal favourite of mine too,’ Taekwoon laughs, a pretty, breathy sound. ‘It was great only because you sang with me.’
‘N-No way!’ Jaehwan’s voice comes out stuttered, heart racing at Taekwoon’s casual statement which basically implied that the both of them were a great match. Maybe Jaehwan’s overthinking it. Probably.
‘I’m sure your voice would sound amazing on its own.’
‘Fine,’ Taekwoon chuckles, ‘I’ll accept your compliment, then. It’s such high praise coming from the ace of our school’s choir, what an honour!’
‘I’m honestly not that great,’ Jaehwan manages a weak smile, before looking to his watch.
‘Oh? Lessons are starting in five minutes, we’d better start heading out.’
‘Sure,’ Taekwoon carefully closes the lid of the piano and stands up, Jaehwan following after.
‘Before I forget, can I ask you something?’
‘Sure, if I have an answer,’ Taekwoon says, as he fits the metal key in and twists to lock the door.
‘Umm-- about the Secret Santa activity,’ Jaehwan speaks, and Taekwoon nods slowly, ‘Can I ask who is it that you’re getting the gift for?’
‘Well, I do think that’s supposed to be a secret, hence the name of the activity,’ Taekwoon chuckles. ‘So… I guess you’ll find out on the day itself. Which isn’t even too far from now.’ Taekwoon pushes the key into his back pocket. ‘What about you? You won’t tell me who you’re getting the gift for either, would you?’
‘Ahh-- I guess not, then.’ Jaehwan bites his lip, shuffling in front to keep up with Taekwoon. ‘What if I ask, if you’ve gotten a gift for that person yet?’
‘I’ve yet to buy the present,’ Taekwoon stops and smiles at Jaehwan, the expression on his face unreadable. ‘But I think I kinda have an idea of what to get, now.’
‘Ohh.. I see.’
By now, Jaehwan too has an idea of what to get for Taekwoon -- he also thinks he might just have a sense of who Taekwoon’s getting the gift for.
═ ❄ ═
It’s finally Christmas day, and also the day of the long-awaited Secret Santa gift exchange. The class had booked a chalet for this special occasion, and everyone had arrived early to decorate the place before the planned barbeque dinner and lastly, the gift exchange. Students are cluttered around everywhere as they feast on the barbeque buffet, chatting around with friends, accompanied with the occasional breaking out of laughter. Many wires of bright decorative lights are strung around the staircases and doors -- colourful lights flickering rhythmically, very pretty. Upbeat Christmas music plays aloud, broadcast throughout the chalet -- all of this adding to the burning festive spirit.
‘Okay, class!’ Hakyeon shouts, stood in the centre of the room, right next to the little Christmas tree that a student had kindly brought -- its leaves a rich, dark green, a quaint little golden star placed at the top, its look completed with decorative lights as well as your usual Christmas tree ornaments. The chattering and laughter dies down quickly, a moment of silence for Hakyeon to speak. ‘Now, is the time you guys have all been waiting for!’
Almost immediately, the volume of chattering increases again, cries of excitement and joy.
‘Get your gifts ready, and we shall start the Secret Santa gift exchange now!’ Hakyeon chirps, and the class erupts in cheer. ‘Let’s go!’
Jaehwan quickly sips up the last bit of his drink at this, and hastily rushes to where he’d placed his bag -- and Taekwoon’s Christmas gift. Jaehwan nervously licks his lips as he carefully takes the wrapped present in his hands, eyes searching for Taekwoon. Almost immediately, he spots him -- Taekwoon, smiling, standing tall and broad amongst the other students. He too has got a wrapped gift in his hands, and he’s… walking towards Jaehwan.
The excitement rises in Jaehwan, had he been right about his assumption? It seems more and more probable, as Taekwoon takes step after step in Jaehwan’s direction, inching closer and closer -- Jaehwan’s fingers tighten around Taekwoon’s gift with anticipation.
‘I said you’d find out today who I’d be giving the present to, didn’t I?’ Taekwoon smiles, such a warm look in his eyes. ‘Merry Christmas, Jaehwan-ah.’ Taekwoon carefully passes the nicely wrapped gift to Jaehwan.
‘W-Wow, I never would’ve guessed!’ Jaehwan laughs weakly, irises wavering as his gaze meets Taekwoon’s sincere one.
‘Merry Christmas to you too, Taekwoon.’ Trying his best to control his expression, Jaehwan pushes towards Taekwoon the gift he’d prepared. Taekwoon chuckles as he accepts the gift with a whisper of thanks. ‘Believe me or not,’ Taekwoon smiles, ‘I kinda had an idea that you were getting my gift, somehow. It seems we are the only mutual pair,’ Taekwoon’s gaze flickers around the room, and then back to Jaehwan. Then falling on the pink in his soft looking cheeks. ‘I guess it must really be fate, that brought us together.’
(Damn you, Hakyeon. But also, thank you so much.)
‘Yeah, I guess,’ Jaehwan smiles, gaze lowering shyly onto the present as he nervously fiddles with the cute ribbon securing the gift together.
‘To make things more fun,’ Hakyeon speaks again, voice loud and clear in the chalet. ‘Let’s unwrap our gifts now!’
Immediately, the place is filled with some groans and cries of horror. And then there’s the sound of the ripping of paper, the crinkle of plastic -- accompanied with various cries of satisfaction and joy, but also accompanied with joking curses at friends who’d gotten things like toilet paper and underwear and other things that shall not be mentioned. Taekwoon and Jaehwan both smile at each other before carefully unwrapping their gifts -- both about the same size, carefully and lovingly wrapped up.
The first thing Jaehwan sees upon unwrapping the gift is a soft, small Corgi plushie. It’s followed by a soft cry of surprise, an elated smile on Jaehwan’s face as he hugs and squeezes the soft toy gently. It’s adorable -- it looks really similar to Coffee, it’s eyes large and almost teardrop like, cute short limbs protruding from its soft body. The next thing he sees is a small box, eyes widening -- it’s very similar to one he’d also given to Taekwoon.
Taekwoon smiles as he’s greeted with two boxes -- one of them is a clear box, showcasing a miniature piano, carved precisely out of cherry wood. It says it’s a music box, Taekwoon sighs with contentment when he carefully takes the wooden piano out of its box and gently twists the little metal key at the back -- soft music starts twinkling from the piano piece, to Taekwoon’s delight. The second box is opaque, and as Taekwoon uncovers it, he gasps, looking at Jaehwan.
Jaehwan also meets his gaze, eyes wide and there in his hands is a small handheld cassette player, with it a pair of earphones. Taekwoon bites his lip as he looks down in his own hand -- a very similar cassette player laying in his palm, also attached with it a pair of earphones. Jaehwan looks at Taekwoon, gaze quickly flickering down at the ground shyly -- swallowing nervously as he brings the earbud to his ear, fitting it in perfectly. Jaehwan bites his lip, a shaky finger hovering across the play button before pressing down on it. The strangely familiar tune sends chills down Jaehwan’s spine:
Words on the tip of my tongue
Words that I want to say only when I see you
That you’re too precious, I’m gonna protect you
Those words that I’ve been holding in
Jaehwan looks up to see that same shocked look in Taekwoon’s dark, glazed eyes. His dazed expression slowly, gradually melts into one of unspoken joy and gratitude, matching that of Jaehwan’s -- both immensely touched. In Taekwoon’s ear, Jaehwan’s sweet voice sings the same lovely tune:
I love you, I love you, I love you
Because saying just once or twice isn’t enough
I can’t save it, I can’t hide it
I’m confessing my true heart
They’d both chosen to give the other a cassette player, and had both chosen the same song to sing in their tapes. There, physically, were Taekwoon and Jaehwan in the chalet filled with students and with chaos and chatter -- but at the same time it felt as if they were both in a place of peace and absolute tranquil: a single soft voice singing a sweet song of love, melodies echoing beautifully in their shared, personal place.
(And there it was -- the answer they’d been waiting for.)
Taekwoon looks to Jaehwan and his large eyes are shining unusually wet beneath his rounded glasses. In those dark irises, Taekwoon sees the reflection of a mix of colours, twinkling Christmas lights, and a reflection of something else, very similar to the look in his own eyes -- delving in deep and losing himself in the soft dark chocolate of Jaehwan’s irises, Taekwoon sees a bright spark of pure adoration. Jaehwan has never looked so pretty.
And Taekwoon -- he has never felt so in love.
//
‘Wow, the Christmas decorations in the city are so, so pretty,’ Jaehwan gasps, head continuously tipped up and gaze never leaving the many clusters of bright, flickering lights strung and hung across tree to tree, street lamp to street lamp.
‘Yeah, they really are.’
Taekwoon smiles as he squeezes Jaehwan’s hand softly in his own and this, this feels familiar -- Jaehwan recounts back to the first day Hakyeon and Sanghyuk had ditched them, and giggles to himself at how secretly thankful he is to those devils for that day, for everything that’s happened thus far. This -- long coats draped over shoulders, shoes trudging through soft, pure snow, hand in hand and keeping the other warm. It’s extremely similar to the cute couples’ date Jaehwan had imagined that day -- only this time, it’s in the dark of the night during the festive season, and it’s real. It’s happening right now, and it feels almost dreamlike.
‘You’re so weird sometimes, Jaehwan. Giggling to yourself so suddenly.’ Taekwoon chuckles at the way Jaehwan’s eyes widen sheepishly, like he’d just caught himself off guard.
‘Oh?’ Jaehwan brushes his fringe from his eyes, hand squeezing Taekwoon’s one unconsciously. ‘I was… was just thinking about how… this is nice. Really nice.’ Jaehwan looks up at a smiling Taekwoon and giggles. ‘I like it, very much.’
‘Cute.’ Taekwoon stops and brings a hand up to Jaehwan’s cheek, squeezing the soft flesh playfully between his thumb and index finger. Jaehwan gasps, and Taekwoon notes how the skin of his cheek warms up under his touch, ever so slightly. Suddenly overcome with a strange compelling attraction towards Jaehwan again, Taekwoon withdraws his touch -- lowering his gaze to the snow by his feet as a smile itches at the corners of his lips.
Suddenly, there’s an excited tug to his hand, ‘Look, Taekwoon, that Christmas tree!’
Taekwoon looks up and sees there, in the centre of the vast city square, standing tall: an enormous Christmas tree -- almost majestic looking at first sight, gloriously decorated with an unimaginable number of prettily shining ornaments, looking almost ethereal with how it’s illuminated with a twinkling, soft white light.
‘It’s beautiful.’
‘Shall we take a picture there to… celebrate this day?’
‘Sure, of course.’
There’s a sudden shrill cry of surprise beside him, and Taekwoon’s heart nearly stops -- he looks over to see Jaehwan looking extremely horrified, and there, the sources of his horror: Hakyeon and Sanghyuk who, in an attempt to surprise their friend, had pounced mercilessly on a now furious looking Jaehwan. With the usual cheeky grins on their faces. Taekwoon tries to hide his small smile at Jaehwan’s highly exaggerated reaction.
‘You guys,’ Jaehwan starts, an angry pout playing on his pursed lips, and honestly, Taekwoon thinks -- how’s anyone to take him seriously when he looks so adorable like this?
‘You guys nearly killed me! I nearly had a heart attack, I’m not even kidding!’
(When he’s angry and flustered, Taekwoon notices that Jaehwan trips over his words and stutters a lot. It’s cute.)
Hakyeon and Sanghyuk merely give Jaehwan identical teeth-filled grins, not in the least bit bothered by his angry outburst.
‘We followed you here, Jaehwan, to give you your Christmas gift.’ Sanghyuk starts, and Jaehwan, always so soft -- his gaze immediately softens, and melts away into one of gratitude. ‘We’ve been friends for so many years, even though we aren’t your Secret Santas, it’s just a given that we should still get you a gift, right?’
Jaehwan feels a sour twinge in his nose, a painful sting in his eyes. Those devils weren’t a hundred-percent evil after all. Jaehwan knew it all this while: a part of him always told him not to completely give up on them and trust in their rarely displayed good sides--
Hakyeon and Sanghyuk both reach into the bag in Sanghyuk’s hands at the same time and pull out something strangely familiar looking -- something Jaehwan had often seen in various cheesy romantic dramas before. Hakyeon and Sanghyuk are both holding almost identical stalks of plant looking things, adorned with a red ribbon at the top, green rounded leaves accompanied with clusters of small pale spheres of fruit. Realisation finally dawns on Jaehwan as the two of them suddenly reach up to hold their stalks of plant above Taekwoon and himself.
It’s mistletoe, Jaehwan’s cheeks start to heat up, lip worried between his teeth. Under the mistletoe--
‘What are you two waiting for?’ Hakyeon chirps, exchanging a look of glee with Sanghyuk. ‘What are you supposed to do under the mistletoe?’
‘I… I don’t know,’ Jaehwan stammers. His heart races when he looks up at Taekwoon, the latter’s expression unreadable. Maybe Taekwoon genuinely didn’t know. Jaehwan doesn’t know whether to be thankful about it, being saved the embarrassment of sharing such an intimate moment in front of two friends; or to feel terrible, letting such a great opportunity that his friends had so generously made, slip. There’s just, too much going on now and it’s hard to think straight, and suddenly--
A firm arm snaking around his middle, a hand squeezing at the curve of his waist -- Jaehwan’s eyes blink open as he’s brought face to face with Taekwoon, their faces barely inches apart and almost touching. A warm touch, a gentle hand cradling his face, and then Taekwoon’s leaning down with a glint in his dark eyes -- Jaehwan’s eyes are fluttering shut unconsciously, at the feel of warm lips meeting his own ones: lips so plush and so soft, is this all just a dream? Taekwoon’s heart thumps wildly in his chest -- he’d not expected that sudden, almost rash move to come from himself, of all people. But that thought is quickly pushed to the back of his mind and completely forgotten because right now, he’s got Jaehwan held tight in his arms, right now: he’s kissing Jaehwan. Jaehwan’s lips part so slightly beneath his ones, his surprised gasp muffled and lost between their lips. Taekwoon’s skin tingles where his fingers softly graze the side of Jaehwan’s pretty, heated face, and his stomach flips at the feel of Jaehwan’s lips -- slightly chapped from the cold weather yet still unbelievably soft, just like how they always look to be. Maybe it’s from his lip balm, maybe not -- Jaehwan’s lips, they taste just like the freshest, sweetest strawberries.
Taekwoon pulls away, takes a deep breath, hand still cradling Jaehwan’s face, arm still secured around Jaehwan’s waist. There’s that dazed look in Jaehwan’s large, blinking eyes, pupils blown wide -- his pale cheeks stained a pretty cherry red, strawberry pink lips parted and glistening oh, so prettily. The city buzz quietens down, Hakyeon’s and Sanghyuk’s squeals and fanboying noises slowly die down as well; once again drowned out by a jarring peace and silence shared between only the two of them -- identical shy smiles playing on both their lips, and both sharing the same warm gaze, filled with adoration.
‘Merry Christmas.’
═ ❄ ═
-inspired by a prompt where a friend rigs secret santa for certain desired outcomes :)))
-the first song (jaehwan played on the piano) is eric nam’s “heaven’s door”! i was going on long search for lovesongs and came across this. the lyrics seemed to fit pretty well and so i checked the mv and song out -- the song was great and the mv was filmed during winter, like, how fitting! felt like i’d struck jackpot, no lie. :D
-the second song (keo sang for each other in their cassette tapes) is k.will’s “my heart is beating”. the perfect confession, how sweet.
-thanks for reading up till here, your support is really appreciated! ♥♥♥
There should be some kind of barrier of self-consciousness one has to overcome when doing something like this for the very first time.
Not with Lee Jaehwan, apparently.
It was undeniable that the boys needed a form of stress relief every now and then. All of them are in the early, curious stages of adult life, after all; and living rather hectic lifestyles, busy schedules daily and all that. Jacking off could be satisfactory at the start, but after a while, gets almost boring, somehow. It’s just not enough.
They’ve all fucked Jaehwan before, individually, in their own time and personal space. Jaehwan could be considered the most open member, out of all of them -- he’d made it clear before that he was perfectly fine with being used and was more than happy to be of help, if the members needed to relieve their occasionally raging hormones. In short, it is a win-win situation: Jaehwan, who got off getting fucked, and the members, who at times needed an alternative form of stress relief.
But it’s never been like this, with all of them together.
Jaehwan had suggested it before to all of them: a gangbang. The members had been shocked at first, of course, at the seemingly bizarre idea. But then the idea was considered, after they’d realised Jaehwan was completely serious about it. He’d wanted it, badly.
They’d decided: sometime after promotions have ended. So here they are, in the living space of their dormitory. There should be some kind of barrier of self-consciousness one has to overcome when doing something like this for the very first time.
Not with Lee Jaehwan, apparently.
Jaehwan smiles sweetly, laid completely bare before the members’ eyes -- standing in front of the couch where the other five members are sat, still fully clothed, mouths hanging open and eyes never leaving the sight of Jaehwan’s pale, naked body. He looks so demure standing there, the soft curves of his body almost feminine; the dim light of their dormitory casting such a pretty light on Jaehwan it makes him look ethereal.
Jaehwan is obviously enjoying this, large cock semi-hard and hanging heavy between his pale thighs, eyes wide and cheeks blushed. He feels absolutely blessed, fully anticipating what is to come, what a mess is to be made out of himself quite soon. Five eyes trained and focused only on him, five boys waiting, hungry for him. And Jaehwan, ready and oh so eager to please.
‘So, how should we do this?’
Jaehwan speaks first, because it’s obvious the others are too dazed to fully grasp that the gangbang is really happening, now.
Hakyeon is the first to snap out of it, looks at Jaehwan and gulps subtly before patting his lap, signalling for Jaehwan to come settle down. Jaehwan’s elf-like ears perk up, eyes shining with excitement as he walks over to Hakyeon and settles comfortably in the leader’s lap.
The kiss, initiated by Jaehwan, is needy -- Jaehwan’s hands coming up to grab the leader’s face as he dives in, pink plush lips meeting Hakyeon’s, eager tongue peeking out with Hakyeon’s in a beautiful swirl. The rest of the members watch as the scene unfolds, completely enraptured; Hakyeon’s fingers lacing through Jaehwan’s soft, light hair to pull him further into the kiss, and his other arm possessively curled around the pretty curve of Jaehwan’s waist; his skin a beautiful darker shade against the pale of Jaehwan’s skin, completing a pretty picture.
‘Across my lap,’ Hakyeon murmurs, voice low and rough, sending chills and excitement coursing through Jaehwan’s body. The younger complies almost immediately, movements haphazard and needy as he arranges himself over the leader’s lap, ass facing Hakyeon and face buried in Sanghyuk’s lap. Jaehwan groans at the heat radiating off the tent in Sanghyuk’s sweatpants, whines at the feel of Hakyeon slowly palming his ass, squeezing, while Sanghyuk pats at his hair, stroking gently the skin of his neck.
Without warning, Hakyeon’s palm lands heavily on his asscheek, the pale skin of Jaehwan’s ass burning in its wake, the pink of Hakyeon’s handprint showing almost immediately -- Jaehwan squeals with surprise and pleasure into Sanghyuk’s lap, legs kicking out behind him. Hakyeon’s hand rests on his ass again, cool skin calming against the burning sensation in Jaehwan’s ass. But then Hakyeon does it again, and again -- over the back of his thighs, even, Jaehwan’s mewls muffled into Sanghyuk’s groin, Sanghyuk’s hand still stroking affectionately behind his ears, assuredly. Jaehwan can hear the audible gasps from the other members, head spinning as he imagines what the other members would be seeing: the soft jiggle of pliant, helpless flesh, the staining of fiery red handprints over pretty pale skin. It stings, it fucking burns, but Jaehwan’s enjoying it so much, loving the pain and humiliation of it all, he’s even drooling all over Sanghyuk’s sweatpants --
The spanking stops just then, and Jaehwan feels some sort of relief, yet there’s a deep yearning for more -- before he knows it, his cheeks are spread, cool air brushing against his sensitive hole. The members groan at the display of Jaehwan’s asshole, Hakyeon’s palms splaying Jaehwan wide open, soft pink furls of skin framing the tiny pucker of Jaehwan’s entrance. Jaehwan whines at the exposure, and his tiny hole twitches needily, eliciting groans from the others.
‘Taekwoon-ah, the lube,’ Jaehwan hears Hakyeon say, and there’s a hustling behind him, before a cold substance is drizzled unceremoniously over the crack of his ass, concentrated over the pink of his winking asshole. Jaehwan moans loudly, feeling filthy -- it’s fucking messy, his chin drenched in his own spit, excess cold lube running down his perineum and all over his balls, his inner thighs as well. Jaehwan’s eyes shut in bliss at the first touch of fingers to his hole -- Hakyeon holds his ass open as Taekwoon rubs softly at the wrinkled skin, then pushes a careful finger in, the squelch of lube ringing throughout the room. It’s been quite some time since someone last fucked Jaehwan or he’d fingered himself, due to the lack of free time from promotions, so there’s a strong resistance in Jaehwan’s rim.
Taekwoon pushes the single finger in and out, slowly and gently, the members watching dry-mouthed at the way Jaehwan’s glistening rim clutches and stretches along with each pull of Taekwoon’s finger. Sanghyuk’s slips three fingers easily past Jaehwan’s soft parted lips into the wet heat of his mouth, in attempt to muffle the extremely erotic sounds Jaehwan’s making at the moment -- Taekwoon pushes the next finger in with some difficulty, spreading his fingers out slowly to stretch Jaehwan’s asshole.
‘He’s really tight.’
Jaehwan’s hips jerk as he hears a soft voice from above. He whines around Sanghyuk’s fingers, the maknae now back to stroking his hair like he’s rewarding a good pet; and Taekwoon’s scissoring his fingers with slightly more ease, now -- aided with the lube and the gradual relaxing of Jaehwan’s once-tight rim. Wonshik’s added to the mix, now, Jaehwan recognises the feel of those thin, long fingers as they wrap snug around his hard cock, stroking slowly. Jaehwan gasps when a third finger joins and presses up against his prostate, almost tearing up from the pleasure, from so, so many hands on him, feels so loved--
Before Jaehwan comes, Taekwoon’s fingers are pulled out with an obscene ‘pop’ sound, pink rim snapping back into place. There are strong hands gripping at his hips, and Jaehwan’s set on the floor on all fours in no time, Hakyeon positioned behind. Jaehwan whines with the denial of his orgasm, drops to his elbows when he feels the of heat of Hakyeon’s body behind; feels the hot, lubed head of Hakyeon’s cock press up against his prepared hole.
Hakyeon holds Jaehwan’s soft waist in his hands as he slides in smoothly, his moan almost embarrassingly loud in the room, at how smooth and tight Jaehwan is inside. Hakyeon pants as he’s completely buried, relishing in the heat of Jaehwan’s passage, nails tightening unconsciously on Jaehwan’s waist.
Soon, a slow rhythm is set up, deep grunts coupled with high whines as well as the squelch of lube and wet slapping sounds of skin on skin echoing throughout their dormitory. The other members are on the couch watching as Jaehwan is fucked, eyes wide, cocks out -- the lube is passed around as they jack off to the sounds of Jaehwan’s begging and the gorgeous display: Jaehwan on his elbows and knees, the position emphasising the gorgeous inward arch of his lower back, pale skin shining beautifully with a sheen of sweat under the dim light, his hips canting back and ass cocking up to get Hakyeon’s cock in deeper like he’s getting paid; and Hakyeon: grip forceful on Jaehwan’s hips, hips moving with the fluidity of only a dancer’s, dark cock disappearing fully inside of Jaehwan’s lithe body with each hard thrust.
Suddenly, Jaehwan’s hair is grabbed, not forcefully -- he raises himself up onto shaky hands and looks up to see Sanghyuk towering above, hard cock out and waiting to be pleasured. Jaehwan smiles through long pretty lashes and Sanghyuk’s heart almost stops -- Jaehwan parts those pretty lips of his without being asked, moans happily as he suckles the head of Sanghyuk’s cock, then bobs his head up and down the impressive length, guided by Sanghyuk’s fingers in his hair.
It’s a miracle the other three watching have not come yet, all trying their best to save their load for Jaehwan when their turn comes -- even as they watch Jaehwan get spit roasted between Hakyeon and Sanghyuk, who by now have managed to time their thrusts into Jaehwan perfectly, the pretty vocal split open on their cocks in both ends, Sanghyuk’s hips pushing Jaehwan onto Hakyeon’s cock and vice-versa. Jaehwan’s cock hangs hard and heavy between his legs, he’s obviously enjoying, loving all of the attention -- it only takes one more fluid thrust of Hakyeon’s cock into his prostate and Hakyeon’s nimble fingers around his length, and then Jaehwan’s coming, mewling around Sanghyuk, spurts of white all over his own torso and on the floor. Hakyeon follows as well, groaning loudly, unable to hold back with the way Jaehwan’s tight ass squeezed and milked around his cock during his orgasm.
Sanghyuk watches it all, eyes glazed over with dark lust. He pulls out of Jaehwan’s now friction-reddened mouth, and he’s not come yet. Jaehwan looks up, pink-cheeked and confused and obviously worrying that he wasn’t good enough, that Sanghyuk had not liked it -- ‘Don’t worry, hyung.’ Sanghyuk says almost immediately, stroking at the sweaty skin behind Jaehwan’s ears, the elder sighing with some sort of relief. ‘Wanted to save my load for your ass.’ Sanghyuk grins, moving behind Jaehwan and gesturing for a blissed out Hakyeon to pull out and move over.
Sanghyuk settles down on the floor, growls at the sight of the tiny gape of Jaehwan’s pink asshole when Hakyeon pulls out, some white come oozing out right after. He wastes no time in getting Jaehwan to sit in his lap, the vocal letting out pretty whimpers which harden the others’ cocks even more, as he’s sunk down onto the wide girth of Sanghyuk’s cock. Sanghyuk, though the youngest, was undeniably the biggest among them all. Jaehwan’s head is thrown back against Sanghyuk’s shoulder when he’s sat down fully, big hot hands palming at his waist and a wet mouth on his exposed neck, sucking pink smudges into clear skin. Sanghyuk manoeuvres them such that they are facing the couch, giving the other members the full pleasure of watching each inch of his thick cock disappear slowly into Jaehwan’s smaller body with each thrust, hands pulling apart Jaehwan’s soft thighs for a better view. Hakyeon’s come oozes and is pushed out of Jaehwan’s body with every bounce, the squelching sounds and the sight of Sanghyuk’s cock being coated in white each time Jaehwan is lifted up are absolutely filthy, earning a symphony of curses from the highly worked-up audience.
‘I want to--‘
The members are surprised when Jaehwan speaks, voice rough and trembling with need. Sanghyuk stills his grip on Jaehwan’s waist, stops his movements inside the elder for a moment.
‘What?’
‘I want to try…’ Jaehwan whines, cheeks stained such a pretty red, delicate body heating up in Sanghyuk’s arms, ‘Want to try having two of you inside of me,’ Jaehwan finally gasps out, whimpers at the low growl Sanghyuk lets out against his neck, at how Sanghyuk’s nails unconsciously bite into his waist, almost painfully.
Wonshik almost comes at that request, and it’s honestly a miracle he’d managed to hold back -- he gets up immediately, lube-slick cock bouncing up awkwardly against his stomach as he settles down in front of Jaehwan and Sanghyuk. Sanghyuk curses, just thinking about having his cock in Jaehwan, with someone else -- he’s already tight enough like this, just how fucking amazing it’d feel if they actually managed to get Wonshik inside too--
Sanghyuk spreads his legs to accommodate Wonshik, pushes Jaehwan’s thighs further apart as well. Hongbin gets up to pass them the lube, then settles down beside to offer help if needed, but mostly to get a clearer view of it all. Wonshik mutters a word of thanks as accepts the lube, uncapping the bottle to drizzle lube over his fingers, and drizzle even more over area where Sanghyuk’s cock disappears inside of a flushed and trembling Jaehwan.
Sanghyuk and Jaehwan both moan simultaneously, and they’d be laughing at how they’d actually managed to harmonise if not for how good and sinful this feels -- Wonshik presses a careful finger to Jaehwan’s rim and presses in, groans as it pops past the tight muscle into wet warmth. It’s so hot inside, so tight, Wonshik groans, gently pushing another finger in, he can’t fucking wait to fit his cock in there too--
Sanghyuk whispers words of assurance against the heat of Jaehwan’s ear, big hands soothing gentle circles into the skin of Jaehwan’s waist, ‘You can do it, for us, hyung. Come on, relax, yes, that’s it,’ Wonshik finally manages to add a third finger as Jaehwan’s melts slightly into their touch, his body burning and flushed pink at the praise, thighs spreading and quivering in anticipation. Everyone including Jaehwan watches, wide eyed and focused on this crucial moment, as Wonshik pushes a single finger in and hooks it outwards, stretching Jaehwan’s asshole and making room for one more -- everyone gasps, simultaneously, as Wonshik presses the head of his cock into the tiny space created, and pushes in, pops past Jaehwan’s rim--
Jaehwan pants softly and shivers against Sanghyuk’s chest as Wonshik finally pops in, trembling fingers clutching at Wonshik’s thighs as the rapper growls. ‘A little more, hyung, relax’ Wonshik’s deep voice sends shivers down Jaehwan’s spine; there’s a stinging sensation in Jaehwan’s eyes, blood thrumming hard in his veins at the stretch when Wonshik pushes an inch further in.
There’s a whole lot of resistance with how tight Jaehwan is and how big Sanghyuk is, but Wonshik finally manages to fully seat himself inside. It takes all of Wonshik to not come there and then, with how tight it is, with how desperately Jaehwan’s clutching at his arms, breathing so heavily, eyes teary and full of need; with how Sanghyuk’s thick cock pulses hard and hot where it’s pressed up against Wonshik, the two of them squeezed impossibly tight together. They can feel Jaehwan’s rim flutter helplessly where its stretched around them, trying to adjust to the foreign, first-time stretch.
‘You’re so good,’ Wonshik stutters, even shocking himself with how breathless and needy he sounds. Jaehwan only whimpers in response, mind too clouded with pleasure to form any coherent sentences, slumped boneless against Sanghyuk’s chest. Wonshik’s hands reach out to hold Jaehwan’s slim hips, joining Sanghyuk’s hands, ‘You’re taking both of us so well’. Wonshik looks into Jaehwan’s half-lidded eyes for some sort of signal, approval. Jaehwan gets the hint, bites his lip and nods weakly, fingers tightening against the hard muscle of Wonshik’s shoulders in anticipation.
‘Let’s move, Sanghyuk-ah.’
Wonshik’s voice is soft and Sanghyuk nods, lip worried between his teeth as he adjusts his hold on Jaehwan’s small waist. The two of them lift the vocal up, so slowly and gently it makes Jaehwan almost squeal, the vocal’s breathless panting ringing in their ears, soft, high little ‘ah, ah, ah’ sounds that never fail to drive everyone in the room fucking crazy. The stretch is so much its painful, tears threatening to spill out of Jaehwan’s doe eyes, but it feels good, Jaehwan thinks -- the hot burn on his rim and the too thick movement of two cocks against the plush walls of his ass, has his blood roaring in his ears.
It’s not easy for the rest of them too, to watch the scene unfold. It’s not easy with how soft and small and almost vulnerable Jaehwan looks trapped between two bigger, firmer bodies. It’s not easy with how sinful it feels to enjoy watching this, knowing that their Jaehwan is, right now, taking two cocks up his ass, almost like it isn’t his first time. It’s fucking filthy, seeing Jaehwan’s pretty, sweat-glistened face twist into all forms of pleasure as his ass is taken and wrecked; seeing the little bulge in the lower portion of his once-flat tummy disappear and appear again with each thrust--
‘He’s so pretty, isn’t he.’
Hakyeon strokes his own cock and sighs loudly from where he’s sat on the couch, ready to come a second time just from how hot this all is. There are grunts of agreement from the rest of the members, coupled with the pinkening flush over Jaehwan’s body at the attention and praise. Hongbin finally gets up, stands in front of a teary-eyed Jaehwan.
‘Come on, hyung.’ Hongbin laces his fingers through the soft strands of Jaehwan’s blonde hair and tugs his head up gently, groaning at how pretty Jaehwan is, sweat-damp fringe matted messily across his forehead, swollen lips parted around several whines, cheeks blushed a pretty rose. ‘One more cock, can you do it?’
Jaehwan needs no prompting by now, eyes hazy, drunk off cock. His soft mouth drops open wide, for Hongbin to use.
‘You’re so, so pretty hyung.’
Hongbin cups Jaehwan’s neck and pushes the elder down onto his cock, relishing in the softness and the heat of Jaehwan’s perfect little mouth. Anyone who says they haven’t thought of seeing their cock buried in Jaehwan’s pretty mouth would be a fucking liar, Hongbin decides. To be able to see those lips stretch around his very own cock in person is a true blessing. Add in an extra bonus with how Jaehwan’s now taking three cocks at the same time, all crammed into his sweet little body.
‘Such a good boy,’ Hongbin rasps, fingers pulled tight in Jaehwan’s hair, fucking Jaehwan’s mouth harder, now, hips driving in with force. Jaehwan’s mouth is slackened now, an open hole to fuck into, spit frothing messily around the corners of his pretty swollen lips, tears of pleasure and pain staining his cheeks. ‘Loving it, aren’t you, hyung? Taking three cocks so well.’
At this, Jaehwan comes, completely untouched, without any warning whatsoever. It’s the painful sting in his scalp, the ache in his jaw, the pleasurable stretch of his lips and asshole and just in general the feeling of being so filthily used for pleasure and loving it, that pushes Jaehwan over the edge. He comes and comes all over his own and Wonshik’s chests as he splutters and cries out around Hongbin’s cock, the walls of his ass tightening impossibly around the two cocks he’s split open on -- Wonshik and Sanghyuk both come as well in surprise, growling at the sudden incredibly tight grip around their cocks, emptying their loads deep inside of Jaehwan’s body.
Jaehwan whimpers, breath hitching at the feeling of hot spurts of come, too much come, coating his insides; his own spent cock twitching, limp by his stomach. There’s a tug on his hair again, and Jaehwan looks up through glassy eyes to see Hongbin jerking off. Jaehwan is still sane enough to know to close his eyes, right before the spray of hot come hits -- all over his face, some in his hair, some dripping past his swollen, parted lips. Jaehwan moans at the taste, whines at how Hongbin’s now running soothing fingers through his come and sweat-drenched hair, massaging at his stinging scalp and alleviating the pain. It feels good.
Sanghyuk presses kisses over every inch of skin he can reach -- the back of Jaehwan’s neck, his still heated ears, the skin of his back; before pulling out carefully. Wonshik takes this time to kiss Jaehwan, savouring the feel of those soft lips, moans at the subtle taste of Hongbin’s come. The moment Sanghyuk pulls out, the tight clamp around Wonshik’s cock is gone, Jaehwan’s rim too stretched out to fully close back for now, leaving his asshole gaping and spilling come in a steady flow. Wonshik also pulls out slowly, popping out of Jaehwan’s used body -- the vocal mewling at the feeling of being so empty suddenly, at the filthy feeling of hot come leaking out the helpless gape of his ass.
Jaehwan whines in some sort of protest, then stops when Sanghyuk presses two fingers against the oozing pink of his fucked-out asshole, as some kind of plug to keep the come in. Jaehwan gives a tired, satisfied smile. Sanghyuk knew best, knew how much Jaehwan liked the feeling of being filled.
‘Our Taekwoon hasn’t had his turn,’ comes Hakyeon’s voice, the leader stroking at a blushing Taekwoon’s cock. Jaehwan sighs happily, eager to please yet another member. Before he even gets to stand up, though, his legs are giving in, he’s stumbling back into Sanghyuk’s lap. The younger members end up having to half carry half drag a limp Jaehwan over to the couch, Sanghyuk’s fingers still pressed gently into his wet hole.
They position Jaehwan over a waiting Taekwoon, erect cock standing proudly, then they start to lower Jaehwan -- Wonshik and Hongbin holding Jaehwan’s pale, soft thighs apart and Sanghyuk’s hands holding his waist, sinking the pretty vocal down fully on Taekwoon’s cock.
It turns Taekwoon on, how the slide in is way too fucking smooth and easy, unlike the initial tightness there should be. The previous members had fucked every single bit of resistance out of Jaehwan, the younger was now just a loose clamp, a wet one -- walls drenched in load after load of come, which helped to ease the slide as well. Jaehwan is slumped tiredly against Taekwoon’s chest as the elder grabs at his hips, jerking him up and down. There was no way Jaehwan still had any energy to ride, after all of that fucking. The wet sounds coupled with each slide inside are absolutely dirty as well, Taekwoon groans as he holds Jaehwan’s lithe body up and jerks his hips forcefully into that soft, willing body.
Jaehwan shivers and whimpers so prettily in Taekwoon’s arms, mouth slack and drooling where it’s pressed against Taekwoon’s neck, body jerking with sensitivity with each thrust of Taekwoon’s cock against his abused prostate. It’s not long before Taekwoon comes -- already sensitive from the long wait, also with the aid of the loose hot grip of Jaehwan’s ass around his cock; and he’s finally pushed over the edge with the filthy soft noises of pleasure Jaehwan’s making in his ears.
‘Fuck.’
Taekwoon spills inside of Jaehwan, more come than usual because of the long wait. Jaehwan sighs and collapses against Taekwoon’s chest, Taekwoon’s cock still buried in the sticky heat of Jaehwan’s wrecked body.
‘Did he fall asleep?’
It’s justifiable if Jaehwan had actually fallen asleep -- the whole thing lasted for more than an hour, it was definitely incredibly physically as well as mentally straining for the vocal, just as it had been for the rest of them.
‘I’m still here.’
Jaehwan shifts in Taekwoon’s hold, mumbles softly against Taekwoon’s clothed chest. Taekwoon smiles and rubs affectionately at Jaehwan’s neck, patting softly at his ass. With Taekwoon’s help, Jaehwan finally lifts up, off Taekwoon’s cock, and collapses onto the couch between the members.
‘That was fucking amazing,’ Jaehwan sighs, eyes shut in bliss and thighs spread lazily, obscenely.
‘Fuck, Jaehwan-ah.’ Hakyeon moans, gaze falling onto the space between Jaehwan’s thighs where a steady flow of come is leaking out of his loose hole, a growing puddle of white on the couch. Thank goodness it was a waterproofed leather couch, otherwise it’d be a real bitch to clean up and explain.
‘You’re leaking all of our come, Jaehwan-ah.’
Jaehwan only sighs and smiles weakly, legs spreading more. ‘It feels good.’ Jaehwan giggles at the members’ gasps of shock at his reply.
‘Such a dirty mouth, Jaehwan.’ Taekwoon’s flushed again, hand resting high on Jaehwan’s thigh.
‘So, to clean up.’
Jaehwan gasps when Wonshik suddenly appears between his legs.
‘Can’t let all that come go to waste, hyung.’
Jaehwan curses as his thighs are spread and pulled over Wonshik’s shoulders, ass dangerously close to Wonshik’s face.
‘What are you--‘
Jaehwan is cut off when Wonshik licks between his cheeks, finding his ruined asshole. He almost squeals when Wonshik presses his tongue in unceremoniously -- it’s an easy slide in, since Jaehwan’s still loose and gaping slightly from the fucking. Wonshik groans, satisfied, as his tongue flicks in and out of Jaehwan’s body, fucking and eating Jaehwan out, moans at the taste of all that come loaded inside.
‘Wonshik-ah’ Jaehwan gasps, cheeks flushed, embarrassed at how much he’s enjoying something so filthy. His hips are canting forward unconsciously, meeting each flick of Wonshik’s tongue, almost riding Wonshik’s face. The other members are momentarily stunned, before Hakyeon acts first again, lube-slick hand stroking Jaehwan’s limp cock back to hardness.
‘Ahh, it’s sensitive--‘
Jaehwan’s come twice already, still gasping and fucking back onto Wonshik’s tongue -- but Hakyeon’s determined to make Jaehwan come a third time tonight, fingers insistent as they move up and down Jaehwan’s cock. Taekwoon on the other side catches on and joins in as well, fingers plucking at Jaehwan’s pink nipples. They’re so small and so sensitive, it’s a wonder no one’s touched them and played with them yet -- little rose coloured buds standing erect on his pale chest. Jaehwan cries out loudly, shivers as his nipples are pinched and sucked on and as his cock is stroked, as his ass is licked into--
Jaehwan whimpers as he comes finally, for the third time, just a weak spurt of come dribbling out over Hakyeon’s fingers. Wonshik pulls away and Jaehwan’s ass is completely cleaned out, hole glistening a deep pink, shiny with spit.
‘Okay, so one part of the clean-up is settled.’ Wonshik grins, patting at Jaehwan’s ass and releasing Jaehwan’s thighs from his shoulders.
‘You’re so filthy.’
‘I vaguely remember someone begging desperately for two cocks in his ass, just a while ago.’
Jaehwan smacks Wonshik playfully over the head. ‘In all honesty though, that was amazing. I truly enjoyed that.’
‘As expected from you.’
‘Yes, I love the attention, got a problem?’
‘No! I’m perfectly fine with it.’ Hongbin responds so quickly and hastily it has the corners of Jaehwan’s lips tugging up in a smug smirk.
‘So, are we up for this again, another time?’
The response is a silent, unanimous nodding of heads.
jaehwan looks up at taekwoon from where he’s kneeling down, nimble fingers quickly getting rid of taekwoon’s sweatpants, pulling at his boxers to expose taekwoon fully; marvelling at the girth of taekwoon’s still semi-soft cock. not for long. ‘deny it all you want, hyung,’ jaehwan spits unceremoniously in his hand -- soft, delicate fingers wrapping around taekwoon’s cock and stroking slowly. ‘you’ll do everything for me, hyung. you know it.’
‘fuck you.’
‘oh, don’t worry about that, hyung,’ jaehwan smiles so sweetly, doe eyes seemingly innocent, ‘you’ll get to fuck me quite soon.’
taekwoon groans, not denying anything, reaching out for jaehwan’s phone. mind numb with arousal and with jaehwan still stroking skilfully at his now more or less fully erect cock, taekwoon unlocks the phone and taps on the camera application. in a split second, the image of jaehwan looking sweetly into the camera lens all while stroking taekwoon’s cock greets him. taekwoon shuts his eyes and curses under his breath.
this is going to be a wild ride.
‘ready?’
taekwoon’s cock is fully erect now, jaehwan’s hands reaching out to grip tight at taekwoon’s hips. taekwoon bites his lip and adjusts his hold on the phone, willing with all his heart for his fingers to stop fucking shaking.
‘y-yeah.’
‘okay, start.’ comes jaehwan’s command and with that, taekwoon taps to start the recording.
jaehwan starts by smiling into the camera and taekwoon’s heart nearly stops. he licks at those pink plush lips of his, wetting them for the optimal experience. without warning, the sensitive head of taekwoon’s cock is kissed -- jaehwan’s lips are so soft and wet it makes taekwoon’s head spin, he doesn’t even know where to look at anymore, the real jaehwan or the one on camera. taekwoon decides on the latter.
inch by inch, jaehwan moves up, wet warmth slowly engulfing taekwoon’s entire length. when jaehwan reaches the base, the phone is shaking more than when they started -- jaehwan looks up through slightly teary eyes at the stretch, and starts bobbing his head up and down, slowly, then faster -- filthy wet noises echoing throughout the small practice room.
‘shit,’ taekwoon curses, and jaehwan pulls out for just a moment, leaving taekwoon slightly dazed.
‘your cock,’ jaehwan kisses the pink head again, ‘your cock tastes so good, taekwoonie hyung.’
jaehwan definitely made his voice high and breathy on purpose, that fucking tease. taekwoon takes a deep breath, resisting the urge to stop the recording and fuck jaehwan’s mouth proper hard just like he always wants it.
‘carry on.’
jaehwan giggles softly before starting again, kitten licks all over the underside of taekwoon’s cock before engulfing his entire length again, blissful wet warmth -- jaehwan exhales in short, burning hot breaths against the pale skin of taekwoon’s lower stomach, nails tightening subtly against the sharp jut of taekwoon’s hipbones. jaehwan looks up with large shining eyes and swallows around the base of taekwoon’s cock, muscles squeezing tightly, feels like heaven. taekwoon grunts, hips itching to thrust up and fuck into jaehwan’s mouth. he gulps at the sight of the bulging outline of his cock through the thin skin of jaehwan’s neck. damn.
jaehwan pulls off and splutters, taekwoon’s cock springing up embarrassingly hard against his stomach, covered in a thin sheen of jaehwan’s spit. taekwoon makes sure to (shakily) capture the filthy trail of precome and drool running down jaehwan’s chin, the sides of jaehwan’s reddened lips, his swollen mouth parted sinfully. jaehwan smiles and licks at the corners of his mouth, making such a dirty noise of pleasure it makes taekwoon’s cock swell even more painfully.
‘tell me i look pretty, hyung.’ jaehwan rasps, suckling over the head of taekwoon’s cock, wet noises ringing in taekwoon’s red hot ears. ‘tell me how well i’m taking your cock.’
‘fuck no.’ taekwoon growls, one hand gripping at the phone, his other hand cupping the back of jaehwan’s neck, firm fingers lacing around soft strands of jaehwan’s platinum blonde hair. jaehwan whines, noises of complaint muffled around taekwoon’s cock as taekwoon guides him down, head falling back as his cock is buried in the soft heat of jaehwan’s mouth again.
taekwoon sets up a slow rhythm, fingers tight in jaehwan’s hair. he takes a few shallow thrusts into jaehwan’s willing mouth, warmth pooling in his stomach at the sight of his cock bulging out against the skin of jaehwan’s cheek whenever he pushes in, the frothing of drool and come staining jaehwan’s chin and the corners of his mouth. jaehwan’s eyes are shining so prettily. he blinks a few times, and taekwoon bites his lip as he notes the way jaehwan’s pretty eyelashes are stuck together in clamps with tears. taekwoon sighs, admiring the sinful stretch of jaehwan’s glistening, puffy lips -- they always look good, but they look just perfect like this, stretched snug around a cock. jaehwan’s nails bite in harder into taekwoon’s waist, his cheeks stained a pretty cherry red.
jaehwan is so absolutely gorgeous, and taekwoon’s always so weak for his boy—
‘you’re so,’ jaehwan’s eyes widen at the sound of taekwoon’s voice. ‘you’re so pretty like this,’ taekwoon thrusts in smoothly, jaehwan smiling around taekwoon’s cock and tearing up even more from the painful pressure on his scalp, the ache in his jaw. also from how utterly thankful he is to taekwoon for even agreeing to do this.
‘jaehwan-ah’ taekwoon growls, cheeks burning hot with the overwhelming pleasure, ‘you’re taking my cock so well.’ taekwoon’s thighs are trembling violently, stomach muscles tightening, he can feel his orgasm coming. ‘such a good boy,’ taekwoon gasps before he pulls out, orgasm hitting him hard as he comes with embarrassingly loud noises that will all be recorded.
(‘hyung, can you pull out before you come? i want the camera to catch you coming on my face.’)
it’s hard to aim precisely while filming, but taekwoon is more or less successful, directing a spray of come all over jaehwan’s prettily flushed face, some getting into his mussed hair, a good amount falling over his closed eyes and his pink cheeks. jaehwan sighs happily, eyes still shut as he opens his soft, well-fucked mouth. taekwoon groans, getting the hint, the last spurt of come spilling perfectly into jaehwan’s dirty, greedy mouth. jaehwan swallows, oh so eagerly, moaning at the taste -- fingers wiping at his eyes before opening them, lashes coated with thick come.
taekwoon sighs, grabbing jaehwan’s hair again just to give the camera one last look at the mess of a boy knelt at his feet -- a satisfied smile tugging at swollen lips as jaehwan shows off just how messy and prettily wrecked he is. the recording ends with jaehwan looking into the camera with sinful half-lidded eyes, naughty pink tongue darting out to lick at some come caught at the corner of his lips.
‘fuck.’
taekwoon’s legs feel wobbly, muscles like jelly. he weakly passes the phone back to jaehwan, who happily accepts it. using his index finger, jaehwan swipes up some of the come coating his cheek, and brings it into his mouth, suckling at his finger, licking it clean.
‘thanks for agreeing to do that, hyung. love you.’
‘never doing that again.’
jaehwan stands up and grabs at a napkin, carefully cleaning his face. ‘oh please, hyung. you enjoyed it so much too!’
taekwoon glares at jaehwan while tugging himself back into his boxers, pulling his pants up. hell, he’s never going to admit how much he’d enjoyed it. nothing goes hidden when with jaehwan, though. taekwoon should know that.
‘don’t worry,’ jaehwan winks at a flushed taekwoon, reading him like an open book. ‘i won’t forget to send you the clip too.’
where jaehwan mistakes sanghyuk for his blind date, and sanghyuk plays along.
‘taekwoon,’ jaehwan says as he adjusts his coat, reminding himself of the name of the man he’s supposed to be meeting inside the café at 4pm. yet another blind date, he sighs to himself. yes, hongbin was a good friend; just a little too helpful sometimes, jaehwan shakes his head as he recounts all of the various past failed blind dates hongbin had set him up on. this one… is probably going to be a failure too. jaehwan was not one to believe in these kind of concepts.
he takes in a deep breath and puts on a bright smile (he hopes), as he opens the door of the café and steps in, the soft tingling of bells welcoming and announcing his entrance into the small café. hongbin had told him: taekwoon was a fairly large, tall man, with a broad frame. okay. jaehwan scans the small place. it’s pretty empty, save for a few couples here and there and… jaehwan spots him: a man sitting alone at the corner of the café. is it him? the man looks up and catches jaehwan staring—he looks dazed for a moment, before he’s flashing a bright, sweet smile. jaehwan gulps as he feels his heart pounding faster. love at first sight; what jaehwan had always thought was absolute bullshit, could it actually happen in real life after all? is this date finally going to be a success? the man seems of similar age and seems to match hongbin’s description of taekwoon, so jaehwan manages a weak smile as he walks towards the table.
‘hi.’
‘hello!’
‘i’m jaehwan?’
‘oh, hi jaehwan!’
‘would you be… taekwoon?’
sanghyuk’s eyes widen. no he isn’t taekwoon, but he is sanghyuk, and he is quick witted enough to know jaehwan was probably set up on a blind date with this unknown taekwoon guy. and jaehwan’s too cute for sanghyuk to just let him go like this. sanghyuk decides the blind date with jaehwan and taekwoon will not happen.
‘oh umm, yeah sure! i’m taekwoon. nice to meet you!’ sanghyuk smiles, reaching out for a handshake. jaehwan reciprocates, noting that taekwoon’s hand is big and warm and everything nice.
‘hongbin’s really kind of a busybody sometimes,’ jaehwan pulls the chair out to sit down, looking at the man. he’s really handsome, a finely sculpted bone structure and… really cute naturally pursed lips. ‘so sorry you got pulled into this.’
‘oh? no need for apologies at all!’ sanghyuk laughs good-heartedly, then pauses, looking at jaehwan a little too long and intently for jaehwan’s liking and sanity, he can feel his cheeks burning, his heart racing. ‘you’re really cute.’ sanghyuk finally says. jaehwan bites his lip and prays to god it isn’t too obvious how he’s totally falling for this taekwoon guy already.
sanghyuk smiles to himself at the cute cherry red flush staining jaehwan’s cheeks, notes the waver of jaehwan’s irises and the flutter of his lashes. today is a lucky, lucky day.
‘aren’t you warm?’
‘oh,’ jaehwan realises he’s still wrapped tightly in a padded coat and scarf. no wonder. ‘i forgot,’ jaehwan blushes and takes his coat off, ‘no wonder it was getting a little hot.’
(that definitely isn't the only reason)
‘ahh,’ sanghyuk gives an amused smile. ‘let’s go order something to eat?’
the two proceed to the counter, and jaehwan finds out that both of them have similar tastes. they order two sets of iced latte and plain cheesecake. jaehwan thinks it must be fate, him and taekwoon. it’s going great so far, it seems that this blind date is finally going to be a success. hongbin will be happy.
(changing up the usual order for a day wouldn’t hurt, would it? it’s for jaehwan, after all. it’d be worth it, sanghyuk thinks.)
‘so,’ sanghyuk takes a bite out of his slice of cheesecake, ‘what do you like to do usually?’
‘i like to draw,’ jaehwan smiles. sanghyuk raises his brows, ‘that’s cool!’
‘i like to sing occasionally too,’ jaehwan sips at his latte shyly, he rarely told this to others, it was a rather secret pastime. sanghyuk stops munching at his cheesecake and looks at jaehwan excitedly. ‘i do like to sing too!’ jaehwan gasps, finding someone else who shared the same liking for singing was pretty rare. this is a pleasant surprise.
‘judging from the sound of your speaking voice,’ sanghyuk smiles, ‘you must be really good at singing. i can imagine the sound of it already!’ by now, jaehwan’s sure his whole face is red already. this taekwoon really knew the ways to make his heart flutter.
‘nahhh… don’t think i’m great—‘
‘i’m a hundred percent sure your singing is amazing, don’t need to be so humble,’ sanghyuk laughs. ‘you’ll have to sing for me someday!’
(someday. maybe we could also do a duet?)
‘enough praise,’ jaehwan shakes his head. he sips a little more of the iced latte in hopes that the cold from the drink would somehow neutralise the heat radiating off his cheeks. ‘what about you, what do you like to do?’
‘well, in all honesty, i do like to game,’ sanghyuk grins.
‘oh? same for me, but…’
‘but?’
‘i don’t think i’m too good at games, my friends don’t stop telling me about how i suck at them, so.’
‘oh, really?’ sanghyuk laughs, ‘then we’ve got to meet up to game together sometime to see if it’s true!’
‘no way! it’ll just end up with you teasing me about how bad i am,’ jaehwan pouts.
he’s so cute, sanghyuk thinks, what a gem. ‘we’ll see when the day comes,' he laughs.
‘fine, don’t say i didn’t warn you. umm, anything else?’
‘what about anime?’
‘seriously?’ sanghyuk’s a little taken aback at the way jaehwan’s eyes widen almost comically, the way his voice goes up a few pitches higher and the way he almost jumps out of his seat in excitement. jaehwan must be a really huge fan. ‘me too! oh my god.’
‘wow,’ sanghyuk laughs, ‘we’ve got to get together someday to go on anime marathons or something.’
‘that sounds perfect!’ jaehwan smiles, so happily.
seemingly a little embarrassed at his unplanned outburst a while ago, jaehwan scoops a bite of cheesecake into his mouth. sanghyuk notes the bit of cheesecake left at the corner of those pink, soft looking lips. he bites his lip as he takes a napkin and inches closer toward a wide-eyed, prettily flushed jaehwan and wipes the corner of his mouth, smiling weakly, ‘there was some cheesecake caught there.’
‘ah.’ jaehwan almost stutters, taken aback at the sudden act of affection, intimacy.
‘i think this must be fate,’ jaehwan whispers.
‘hm?’
‘you, taekwoon, and me.’ jaehwan says. ‘i never believed in blind dates, because of all the previous failed ones but, but i think… this one might actually work out.’ he smiles. shyly.
‘y-yeah. of course.’
at the mention of taekwoon’s name, sanghyuk stops. there’s a sudden realisation that jaehwan still thinks he’s taekwoon, his blind date. he shakes his leg, not knowing how exactly to approach the subject and reveal to jaehwan that he isn’t, after all, jaehwan’s blind date. that he isn’t taekwoon. that his name is han sanghyuk and he might just be in love.
suddenly, jaehwan’s phone sounds with a notification.
‘oh? sorry for that. just excuse me while i check this message…’
sanghyuk cautiously examines jaehwan’s face as he reads the message. his expression changes, one of shock, before twisting into something similar to that of amusement.
‘um, what’s wrong?’
could it—
‘i don’t know, but look here?’
jaehwan faces the screen to sanghyuk. it’s a conversation between him and a guy named hongbin.
[[ lee hongbin: so sorry for the late notice! i just found out that taekwoon’s not feeling well today, so he couldn’t make it. sorry you had to wait so long ;; ]]
oh no.
'oh... oops,' sanghyuk laughs awkwardly and scoops the last bite of cheesecake into his mouth.
'so umm... why'd you do that?'
sanghyuk looks at jaehwan. his expression is hard to read, but he definitely doesn't look angry. which is saying something. in fact, it almost looks as if jaehwan's suppressing a smile, even. it's all good.
'i was confused when you first approached me... but you were so cute, so i couldn't stop myself from playing along. besides, after our conversation and finding out how much we have in common... and i'm just going to be honest here... i realised i'm actually kind of falling for you? and i think it's the same on your side too?'
there. he's done it. the inquisitive smile jaehwan flashes makes sanghyuk feel a whole lot better. spilling the truth was the right move.
'well... that's interesting,' jaehwan sips up the last of his latte. 'so who are you, really?'
'i'm sanghyuk,' sanghyuk introduces himself a little too excitedly, pleasantly surprised at how all of this turned out, 'han sanghyuk.'
'sanghyuk,' jaehwan repeats with a soft smile and sanghyuk almost dies at how pretty his name sounds coming out from jaehwan. this needs to happen more often.
at this moment, jaehwan's phone sounds again. another message. sanghyuk observes jaehwan's expression again, and notes the small smile on his face as he types out a reply. jaehwan faces the screen to sanghyuk again, and what he sees has him internally dying with joy.
[[ lee hongbin: taekwoon says you guys can meet another day, when's a good time for you? ]]
[[ jaehwan: tell taekwoon it's okay. maybe we can get together another time, in another life. ]]
[[ lee hongbin: huh? what happened, why the sudden change of plans? you found someone else you like? ]]
[[ jaehwan: maybe? yeah, i did :)) ]]
turns out the blind date isn't a success after all, but it's all good. really good.
