angsty squirrelstar and leafpool headcanons because they're my all-time favorites and i love them dearly.
1. ever since Leafpool died, i always believed that she had little habits or quirks that she does depending on how she felt (fidgeting when nervous, quivering a little when excited/happy, etc). so, to expand on this, i headcanoned for Squirrelstar to copy these habits as if she were attempting to keep Leafpool's spirit alive. basically, whenever Squirrelstar gets nervous, she fidgets like Leafpool does. the whole bargain, really.
2. whenever stressed, Squirrelstar internally prays for Leafpool to come down from StarClan so that they both could just sit together. and, to make this a bit more sad than it already is, i imagine that Leafpool does linger around her sister, even before Squirrelstar prays for her to come down from StarClan. Leafpool will always be where Squirrelstar is, even in spirit.
3. sometimes, Leafpool does wish that she were still alive. she has her moments as to where she just wants to be with her sister, but not spiritually. she wants to be with her sister physically. she feels as if she's being selfish when thinking this way, but she can't help it. it's vice versa with Squirrelstar, too.
4. Squirrelstar visits Leafpool's grave constantly. it's practically a force of habit at this point. whenever she does visit her sister's grave, Squirrelstar has conversations with her dead sister, she stargazes with her sister (i imagine that Leafpool loved stargazing, and Squirrelstar grew into loving it as much as her sister does), and she even waters the soil her sister is buried under, believing that her sister can still be hydrated despite being dead. she even brings scraps of Leafpool's favorite prey to the grave as well. this signifies how close they were, their intense bond with each other.
5. both Squirrelstar and Leafpool wish that they could've been better sisters to each other, even though they always did they best that they could for each other. Squirrelstar does this more, however, especially thinking that she wished that she could've found some way to protect her sister from the truth being revealed at the gathering and stuff like that.
(this last one is more like a tiny story, but i still count it as a headcanon because why not.)
6. in my rewrite of the books, i gave StarClan cats/members the ability to interact with the living world in any way they can. so, for this last one (this is a combination of angst and fluff), i made the headcanon that Leafpool finds so many different ways to talk or interact with her sister. this one moment broke Squirrelstar entirely. one night, after a whole day of being leader and doing leader things, Squirrelstar goes to her den to finally get some rest. she's just tired. the moment she steps into her den, she stops in her tracks, her breath catching in her throat and her heart breaking, but not from sadness entirely. Leafpool, her sister in StarClan, left a small note for her. the note speaks of how much she (Leafpool) appreciated every single thing her sister has done for and with her, even the smallest things such as bringing her favorite prey or just sitting in the medicine den with her to keep her company. the one thing that gets to Squirrelstar are these last words: "I'll always love you, Squirrelstar. Even if i faded away entirely." Squirrelstar breaks from this, collapsing and bursting into tears. Leafpool even left a tiny heart made out of brown leaves, resembling her fur. she even used red leaves for her sister's fur, and that was to show that they would always be together, even if one of them is not there physically anymore. and when Squirrelstar is already breaking down into tears, Leafpool is doing the same thing beside her, pressing her spirit body against her sister's living body. even in death, these two shecats will do anything and everything together. no matter what.
(headcanon #6 came from the top of my head, by the way. i thought of everything while writing it.)
if you like these, i can make more of different characters! just make a request and i'll do it as soon as i could! i'll post my fluff headcanons soon as an apology <3
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