8Welcome, travelers! This is a blog, and these are my fics, along with a few things I thought I wanted to post.
First of all, some things about myself. I am a minor, so please dni if you're a primarily nsfw blog. I rlly mean no hate, I just get a bit uncomfortable about that stuff. If you like my writing, feel free to read tho! Just please don't interact.
Call me Tartar/Tar/Tia. As long as you aren't too harsh abt it, feel free to also call me a simp.
Summary: Vox is much more angry than usual now that Alastor's back, and it's causing issues with the WiFi. Velvette makes Valentino calm him down, and the man decides to have some fun in the process.
Notes: These guys are supposed to be the most evil mfs even compared to the other overlords, why tf was their scene in the finale so cuteee agghh,😭😭😭, approx 1.5k words
Valentino had a problem. A large problem, in fact. One that he never usually had.
Vox. Vox was too angry to do his fucking job. It made no sense - Vox was supposed to help calm him down, not the other way around!
"That bitch keeps ruining my connection, Val! Some employee lost a day's worth of editing because it couldn't save!" Velvette had said before shooing him off. "Go calm him down so he stops making everything buffer! At this rate, we'll have another blackout."
Couldn't she do that herself? Valentino wasn't meant for these sorts of affairs! If only Vox was here to calm him down - he always did such a good job with that.
Wait. Vox couldn't calm him down, Vox was the one who needed calming! God, why was Vox so angry? The Alastor thing was cute to watch, but not when it ruined their Internet speed.
"Ugh, but I wanted to-"
"Shoo," Velvette said. "Do your job."
Velvette wasn't sympathizing at all, not like Vox did! Valentino was going to get back at that flat-faced man for causing him such a headache.
From Vox's lair, he could faintly hear swear-filled shrieks.
God, this was going to be such a pain. Valentino almost wanted to make Velvette do it but instead, but she'd just yell at him to calm down, and knowing how blindly rageful Vox was right now - that statement would only make him more angry, and the WiFi would only get even worse. Valentino didn't think he could handle the WiFi getting worse than it already was.
No. Calming Vox down would be easy, he knew it. He'd just need to resort to- Unconventional means.
What were the means in question? Valentino would decide that when he got there. He had a small mental list, though.
He sauntered downstairs, where Vox was hissing, furiously eyeing the screen, tracking Alastor like a cat would a laser pointer.
"That old-timey fucker doesn't know shit about this fucking-"
At some point, it had begun to seem like Vox was swearing for the sake of it. The action made sense, though. He had quite some anger to get out, and swear words were an excellent method of expelling anger.
"Vox," he crooned, because he was going to have fun with this. Unlike some demons who happened to have a flat face, a hatred for radio, and hypnosis powers, he wasn't an uptight little bitch.
"What is it?" The reply came instantly. "I'm busy."
And though that was ordinarily true, right now, Vox seemed like a typical chronically-online easily-trolled loser rather than the CEO who had almost all of the Prie Ring under his thumb.
"Relax a little, would you?" Valentino said, pinching at where Vox's cheek would've been were he not a TV screen and earning himself a slap of the wrist. "I hear you're getting a bit worked up over the radio demon."
"Of course I am! He's a-"
Before Vox could introduce anymore colorful swears that even he'd likely never head of, Valentino poked him in the stomach pointedly.
"Ah-ah," he said, unable to be anything other than endlessly amused by this. "You have to calm down, Vox! Can't you see you're acting irrational right now? Why, Alastor could never-"
He was cut off by Vox's static-filled rage.
"Oh, don't even start!" Vox said, but before he could continue his rant, as Valentino's hand accidentally grazed the back of his screen, he let out a static-filled yelp.
Valentino couldn't help but grin. Right. That was one of the best ways to force Vox to calm down.
The thing about the tech demon was that he was ridiculously, mortifyingly ticklish. And with that ticklishness came mortification. Emotional and physical sensitivity? There was nothing more exploitable than that.
"I almost forgot, darling! How could you possibly have let that happen?" He said, and though his statement had little elaboration, Vox knew what he meant.
A gulp was heard.
"V-Val, don't you fucking dare."
Really, though, how could Valentino possibly have forgotten about this? Vox's reactions were much too amusing, and Valentino hadn't even touched him yet! He'd have to do this more often.
"What should I refrain from doing?" He asked, savoring moment of this. A poke to Vox's side, followed by a velp. "This?"
"Prick," Vox said, looking away.
There was really no point to being insulting, was there, now? But this was an opportunity for Valentino.
"I'm hurt!" He said, feigning a pout. "You're so mean to me."
Vox grit his teeth at that, but before he could retort with whatever string of insults he had in mind, Valentino took the chance to dig his fingers into Vox's neck.
Already, Vox was struggling to hold in his laughter."
"I- haah- f-fucking-"
And then, Valentino reached his antenna.
"H-Hahahate you! Gah, fuhuck!" Vox squirmed futilely, namely, it was futile he wasn't actually moving away. Valentino hadn't bothered to hold him down, because for some reason, Vox never did manage to actually pull himself together and actively attempt to leave.
"Aww," he crooned, not bothering to give Vox a break. "Is big bad Vox so ticklish he can't help but lose his mind at the slightest touch? You know, I wonder what Alastor would think if he saw you now!"
Any hope of Alastor taking him remotely seriously would be crushed at that moment. Vox pouted, and at that moment, Valentino couldn't help but wonder.why he found a literal Flat screen television's pouting so adorable.
"Shuhut u-up!" He laughed, more giggled like a child, and it was, in all frankness, quite difficult to take him seriously. "L-Lehet me go, or I swear, I'll-"
Valentino prodded at a small wire end sticking out, and Vox's laughter devolved into pure static.
"There we go," he said.
After a while, Valentino finally had his fill, letting Vox go. Now, it was time to get his work out of the way and-
Wait, what was he here to do again? He'd forgotten.
Nevertheless, he was faced with a huffy, pouty Vox. What could be better?
"Come on, darling!" He said, placing a condescending hand on Vox's back, patting him as if he were a child. Because really, that was exactly what Vox was acting like right now. "Did you really loathe it that much? It isn't my fault, you know how I am. I just had to exploit your complete and utter inability to move away properly."
"Don't bring that up again," Vox said, voice low, almost a growl.
Valentino just tilted his head in amusement.
"What? Your utter inability to escape my clutches? I couldn't possibly do that!" He said. "It was much too amusing. You, completely able to leave at any moment, and yet you couldn't even muster up the brainpower to recognize your obvious escape! Honestly, if I didn't know much better, I'd even believe you were enjoying it!"
Vox slammed a fist on the table, eyes wide with embarrassment.
"S-Stop talking, prick!" He said, and the dots quickly connected in Valentino's head.
Oh. That was what was going on.
"You liked it, then?" He asked, though he already knew the answer. It was just funny watching Vox squirm.
"No I don't," Vox said, attempting to regain his typical demeanor - and succeeding, though Valentino knew him too well not to notice the shakiness of his voice. "I'm not even ticklish. Really-"
His right eye spiraled, and for a second, Valentino felt his thoughts cloud.
"Don't you trust me on that, Val?"
Vox's hypnosis wouldn't work that easily. Valentino quickly put an end to that by reaching for the loose wire, completely breaking Vox's concentration.
"G-Gah! You-"
"I should tell Velvette," Valentino said with a chuckle, because he knew how fearsome the thought of anyone knowing Vox's newfound secret would be, especially someone with as much of a penchant for blackmail as Velvette.
"D-Don't," Vox said. "Please."
Vox used the word 'please'? Miracles, it seemed, were not to miraculous after all.
Nevertheless, the mention of Velvette reminded Valentino that he, sadly, had things to do other than mess with Vox. Like get his WiFi back up to task.
"I won't," Valentino said. "If you stop watching the princess's hotel all the time."
Vox's eyes widened.
"And stop watching for that fucking Radio Demon? I don't really know why you think I'd ever do that."
"Then I suppose I'll just tell Velvette-"
"No, wait! Deal," Vox said, eyes filled with panic. Valentino smirked, drawing up the contract.
"Sign here, darling!" He said, and Vox hastily scrawled his signature onto the contract. Those things were good for more than getting souls.
"Fuck you," Vox said. Feisty once again, it seemed. Though he'd likely calm down shortly after. Hopefully with that, swear words would regain meaning to Valentino. It didn't feel ad gratifying to use them anymore - Vox had been using them so often they'd begin to feel like ordinary words.
Valentino just stayed silent, feeling his face stretch into a grin. He could vaguely make out Vox shooting him a concerned look.
Whatever. He'd discovered a new weakness of his dearest Vox's. And oh God, he was going to have so much fun with it.
@cerealmonster15 this is a gift for you because seeing your tags when you reblog my art makes me smile. It kinda motivated me to actually put art on this hellsite, hope you have a good day!
Jamila took an underwater breathing potion to see Azul’s true form for the first time <3 Azul was really really nervous, but becomes insufferable again once she’s sure Jamila still loves her
love that i heard my husband losing his mind in the bathroom out of nowhere for several minutes then he just wordlessly sends me a screenshot of this post
