Before the Hollow
He wasn’t born in silence,
There was noise in everything.
Screen doors slamming hard as hell,
And a house that couldn’t sing.
The gravel popped beneath his feet,
Like warnings he ignored.
Every step away from home
Felt like settling a score.
There was a time he had a name
That people used out loud.
Before it got replaced with looks
That never said they’re proud.
His old man talked in half-truths,
With whiskey on his breath.
Said, “You either learn to take it,
Or you get what’s left.”
So he learned to take it early,
Learned to never flinch.
Learned a man ain’t measured
By the things that make him wince.
First fight came quick and ugly,
Left his knuckles split and red.
He liked the way it felt to hurt
Instead of what was said.
He started running numbers,
Started chasing easy lines.
Little debts turned into habits,
Habits turned to time.
There was a girl who almost had him,
Saw something worth a damn.
But he kept one foot in leaving,
Like he always fucking ran.
Said he’d change, said he meant it,
Said it like a prayer.
Then he vanished for a weekend—
Came back worse for wear.
The money started talking,
And he listened way too close.
Every win felt like control,
Every loss like a ghost.
He borrowed from tomorrow
Like it wasn’t keeping score.
Kicked the door in on his future
Just to settle something more.
There were nights he felt it cracking,
Something shifting down below.
Like the ground was getting closer
Everywhere he’d go.
He’d sit out on the tailgate,
Staring past the trees.
Swore he heard the dirt call his name
In the southern breeze.
He laughed it off, kept moving,
Kept stacking up the weight.
Told himself he had control—
Just a little fucking late.
Then came the ones he trusted,
Or thought he understood.
They shook his hand, stood in his house,
Said they only meant him good.
He fed them at his table,
Gave them space inside his life.
They memorized the exits
While they smiled and played it nice.
He ignored the quiet warning,
That itch beneath the skin.
That feeling something watching
Was already settling in.
The first thing that went missing
Was small enough to doubt.
Then pieces of his life just…
Started phasing out.
He blamed it on the drinking,
On the nights he couldn’t track.
On the jail, the hospital,
On never bouncing back.
He started seeing patterns
In the things he couldn’t prove.
Like the house was learning him
Every time he moved.
The girl was gone by then,
Didn’t leave a note behind.
Just took the part of him
That used to think he’d be fine.
The debts got teeth and started
Taking bites instead of due.
And every road he took from there
Just narrowed into one view.
A driveway in the distance,
Red dirt, dead and still.
A place that didn’t ask him—
Just waited on his will.
He stood there with his bags in hand,
Like he still had a choice.
Like he didn’t recognize
That pull beneath the noise.
“Just temporary,” he told himself,
“Just somewhere I can land.”
But the ground felt like it knew him
Better than he planned.
The mailbox leaned and watched him,
Like it’d seen it all before.
Like every man that showed up here
Walked straight through that door.
He stepped inside the silence,
And it closed behind his back.
Not a slam, not even a sound—
Just a shift he couldn’t track.
And somewhere deep beneath his feet,
Where the roots and secrets run,
Something old and patient
Knew he was the one.
Not chosen. Not special.
Just worn enough to take.
Every crack already in him
Made him easy prey to break.
He set his things down slowly,
Like it wasn’t what it was.
Like this was just another place—
Not the end it does.
But the walls were already breathing,
Even then, that day.
And the man he used to answer to
Was already on his way… away.
Not gone in one big moment,
Not lost in some loud fall.
Just traded piece by piece
Until there was nothing left at all.
And the name he’d tried to carry
Finally slipped away.
Leaving “king of nothing”
With a debt he couldn’t pay.
-kirkshiresloss
//before the hollow//
