[kleptokyutie]

hello again everyone can someone teach me how to shoplift groceries because im gonna be a poor bitch at uni next year x

[liftingdiva-deactivated20181024]

Repost because of dumbasses reblogging outside of the community

[kleptokyutie]

i love collecting coupons :-)

[kleptokyutie]

my exams are starting so i’m logging out of here for a while ✌️

[kleptokyutie]

i swear my local starbucks has more cams than the shops around me loool

[sailorsugarr-deactivated2015060]

Hi. I lifted salami from trader joes today and now I have to eat all of it because I stupidly didn't realise that my mom would wonder where the salami came from if I put it in the fridge so now I'm in my room with a loaf of fancy local salami.

Literally tell her you bought it?

[snowylifter-deactivated20150521]

I love this story

[pumpkinlift-deactivated20180617]

“how do I hide my stolen salami from my parents” is now one of my favorite anonymous liftblr questions 😂👏

[daisypearlgirl]

This makes me laugh so much

[lift-fever]

In defense of the anon if they’re a teenager their mom would be like “why tf did my child randomly buy salami”

[lesbianliftt-deactivated2018071]

The ultimate haul

Es5tée Laud3er, yes really x 3 =$762

Before tax

[kleptokyutie]

wait huh ????? $762 for 3 bottles i’m finished

[mosslifts]

boosting

idk if i’ve said this before but something u can do is go on depop and search ‘iso’- it stands for ‘in search of’ and people post them alllll the time. so you could l/ft things that people post iso’s for the most, or l/ft specifically for an iso and message that person saying you have what they’re looking for. just a thought that works for me!!

[heavenlylifter]

this is such a good tip, thank you!

[makeupjunkielyft]

This story was so funny yet useful

[kleptokyutie]

just a note

im on hiatus till exams finish :(

[kleptokyutie]

cannot fucking wait for exams to be over so i can lift myself an entire new summer wardrobe 👍

[not-a-lyfter]

Liftmas canceled check discord group for more details.

[indecisivelifter-deactivated202]

some of these girls… 😂💃🏼🤷🏼‍♀️

[kleptokyutie]

oh since you wanted to make this conversation public i’ll just have to reply here: if you dont want to make friends then i’m afraid tumblr dot com is the wrong website for you

[stellar-lifting-deactivated2018]

Bebe uses ze/zim/zimself pronouns and nobody can convince me otherwise

[liftelaine-deactivated20180425]

Bebe has a fetish for Woody from Toy Story and nobody can convince me otherwise

[liftingdiva-deactivated20180517]

Bebe has tiny trump hands and nobody can convince me otherwise 

[kleptokyutie]

whenever i get an official looking letter come in that says “THIS IS NOT A CIRCULAR” written on it i’m just like “yep my days are over they’ve got me” skdjdnss

[kleptokyutie]

umm so much for that like £42 cardigan from UO i lifted cuz it’s already got a hole in it

[18551951815219-deactivated20200]

honestly the funniest fuckin thing is newbie blogs with posts like “yeah i stole twenty palettes from one sephøra!!” or “i robbed a dennys lmaaoooo” or 20 “almost caught!!” stories and their blog’s been up a month

full offence you’re not a bad bitch, you’re a dumb bitch, slow ur roll and learn how to do this shit properly & responsibly before u end up in actual trouble that u can’t handle because u didn’t stop and fucking think about the possible consequences of ur dumbassery

[lyte-eyes-blog]

Looking at you, Denny’s thief who got caught the next day.