KNOT WATCH

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GUEST STAR! 🌟

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Flashback to my first-ever topknot trial 3 years ago. What a fresh face! Now I'm just a gnarled old crone whose joints are as knotted as my hair. Hang onto your youth, kiddies! 👵 #cartmeofftothenursinghome 🚑 #feedmejello 🍮 #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 38: America has its astronauts. Russia has its cosmonauts. And Instagram now has its first #babooshkaknot. I know. You are so welcome. 🤗 #onesmallstepforknots #onegiantstepforknotkind #allwrappedupandknotanywheretogo 👵

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DAY 37: Who. Wore. It. Best? 👯 #knotme #beatbyacoaster #knotmyluckyday 🤓 #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 36: KNOT WATCHING IS WAY MORE FUN WITH GIGANTIC EYES AND CAPITAL LETTERS. 👀x💯 #lewksfordays #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 35: My knot's name is Johnny. My pig's name is Porquita. The more you know... #🐷 #🐽 #oinknot #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 34: "Knock, knock." — "Who's there?" "Knot." — "Knot who?" "Yes, Nhat Hoo Vietnamese takeout. You want your pho or what?" 🍜 #dragmeoffthestagewithacane #dadhumorbutworse 🏌#knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 32: Goodnight, knot. Goodnight, thought. Goodnight, knot running through my thoughts. Goodnight, buns. Goodnight, huns. Goodnight, hair. Goodnight, 🐻. #goodnightknot 😴 #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 31: If flipped-up bangs are a "whale-tail," can a topknot be a whale-spout? These are the kinds of tough questions I'm pondering all day, every day. #spoutingwisdom #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 31: 🎤 HELLO, KNOT... / It's me / I was wondering if after all these weeks you'd like to grow / a little faster, if you please / How about a little less like paint drying and more like garden weeds? 🎤#hellofromtheknotside 🙋 #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 30: And in kno time at all, we're onto Knew Year's resolutions. Besides the obvious (as in, this year I want the best bun EVURR 👵), it's probably a good idea to hit the gym and pack on some much-needed muscle to those noodle arms on display here. Oh, and maybe get some 🌞, too. My stripper name right now would definitely be "Sallow Hal." 💃 #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 28: #KnotOnDuty ... As a New Year's treat, I thought I'd give the knot (and all you beautiful people) a night off. Even the knot has to let its hair down once in a while, so to speak. All you NYE revelers: be safe, and most of all, be sensational. 🍾🎉 #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 27: Airport lewks. Back to New York for New Year's Eve ice cream in bed and crying alone in the dark, *cough,* I mean NYE celebrations! 🍾😁🎉. For reals though, I've had some epic days in Kansas this last week. But in a few hours, I'll be able to say...we're knot in Kansas anymore. Shoutout to my main friend of Dorothy @aosmond04 👠👠

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DAY 26: Too...obvious...pun...shouldn't... *sigh*...I can't help myself. Isabelle and Majo TIED THE KNOT. 👫🎉👰💍 So honored the knot and I had front row seats. And shout out to Navi the pooch for being the cutest little bat-weasel this side of the tracks. #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 25: Sad boy, sad looking knot. But life goes on. Esteemed American Whitney Houston said it best when she sang, "It's knot right, but it's ok." Remember, knotheads: #itsknottheendoftheworld ✊ #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 24: Why the cloud over your head, little knot? Is it because you're in a museum but you don't have a brain to understand anything? Just do what I do and nod vacantly in front of each painting. Works every time! #knotacritic #makeartknotwar 😱 #knotwatch #topknot #manbun

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DAY 23: THIS KNOT IS ON FIYAH! No, seriously, can someone bring some water? A fire extinguisher? It smells like burning hair in here. #itsknotright #itsknotok 🔥🔥🔥x💯 #knotwatch #topknot #manbun