DETECTIVE @koiagain FANFIC.
Yes. Its me. koiagaib. Im on a train headinf to chudville to see about a series of murders that have been happening. i take a sip of my. liquid. A man suddenly scoots into the seat across from me.
@lukemustdi3. The comedic relif in such a sad sad story.
shut up im watching instagram reels. Haha poopy butt stinky. Poo poo diarrhea. Poopy stinky butt butt oens poopoo
hmm. Fhis man is clearly mentally challenged i think to myself. I hit the call button that fancy trains probably have. I hit it rapidly because thus man is clearly havibg an episode.
But as soon as help arrives he immediately sits straight in his seat and points at me.
that person is crazy help me.
what rhw what i think to myswlf. This man is a genius with manipulation tactics ive nevwr seen before.
The bellboy security guard or whatever @jamm3rz slicks back their nonbinary bowl cut
i dont get paid enough for this. they say. Slicking back gheir nonbinary hair. They had a tie that had a bunch of buttons on it that looked pretty cool. Overall a cool looking lad.
wow i say. anyways are you gonna kick me off the train or something.
i mean idk. Your not acting crazy like this guy claims.
luke clutches his fists in anger. He pulls up a photo of two men kissing to calm himself down
ok im leaving bye. Jam says. Leaving a trail of nonbinary in their wake
Wow. That was a really nonbinary person. Koi says. So um. Hey can you turn that down.
What. Luke says. Watching instragram reels on full volume.
I said could you turn that down-
the train comes to a hault chudville populationk 420 haha weed joke
anyways this is my stop. Koi says. Ok. Luke says.
koi waves to jam before getting off the train.
jam waves nonbinaryly back
wow this chudville air hits different. Koi says. Koily boing.
Koi steps into the sheriffs office
officer victor? Officer @v1ktorian steps out of his office. Hey im texting prince shut up.
whos prince?
i said shut up. FAG
woah woah woah you dont even know me. What a rude sheriff
sorry your right… its just.. im so muscular and handsome…
anyways lets get down to business. Victor says. Victorly.
he takes out evidence of fhe murders. So since its such a tiny town. The myrder could be anhone. Vicgor says. Victorly.
i thought it was 420 peopl— shh shh shh. Victor ahushes
that doesnt matter. So the furst person your gonna interview is the baker. Ian. Nicknamed sparkles.
wow thats so gay im not gonna call him that. Koi says. Homophobicly.
wowwww… a voice calls out from behind. Mayor @smelliza walks through the open doorway
Hey its me mayor of chudville. She says in an extremely THICK british accent. Like so thick you cant even tell whag shes saying
um. What did that brit just say. koi says. koily
idk. victor says. Textunf prince.
anyways go investigate ian the baker in tiny town chudville. The british women says. In a thick birtish accent
koi walks into the bakery and gets hit with a sweet savory scent idk what bakerys smell like
the gay baker named sparkles perks up from behind the sweets case.
hi im ian @viansparkles the baker in tiny town chudville
So did you kill those people orrrr
no im a jolly baker whhy would i do thag.
Suddenly a customer walks in.
omg hi ollie aka @pupfettipaws the unemployed. Do you want your usual.
um. Why not just go to a grocery store or something to— koi gets cut off
anyways your payment? Ian bats his eyelashes
Haha alrifht. Ollie says.
he leans over the counter and loudly starts sensually kissing ollie in a quiet room so it echos
this continues for like 3 minutes
um- im gonna go… koi says.
ok who do i interrogate next… hm.. hmmm.. uhh… hm’zzz
ok how about @poetnamedprince the librairyan.
ok i walk into the library
Hi. Prince says. Princely.
hi im the deten,8ve. Did you kill those people or what
hold on im taking 1 hour to text victor back. Im also watching that one show with the angel devik yaoi thing
ok im gonna leave then. Suddenly i spot a mysterious figure outside in the window . Im gona go chasw that guy.
ok. Prince says. Princely.l
i dart outside the backdoor and follow the mystery man.
its the guy frim fhe traun!! I exhale!! I mean explain i mean exlaim!! stop right thwreNn
luke turns around. Holdung a bloody knife or sowmthing.
omg your the kuller. Omg. Okg im so scared.
luke chuckles. Lukely. You fool. Hold on i havw to wtach insteagram rewlw.
because rhey said TUNG TUNG TUNG WAS STUPID!!
he starts screaming ajd flainging around
wow he had a point. Id say those killings are justified. Ok im gonna go chexk out
The dungens and dragons shop
koi wlaks into the dungens and faggots shop.
wow it stinks in here. Wheres the cool stuff ljke. Cool stuf
the caisher @cy-more-like-cry comes out. Holding like a dragon figure or something
hi welcum in my name is cyrus. Im also one of leos moots in this storyS
thanks. I founded it with my beloved partner whom i forgot the username of.
ok we arw closing you heed to lwave.
wow this town kinda rucing sucks. And ao doea this fanfiction. Suddenly a wild deer runs out and transforms intk a person named @claws-in-my-back or something even though i forgot to ask them if they wanted to he in this. Hi im a deer and i know who the murder is.
yeah i know too.
what. Why didnt you like tell the sheriff
i tried texting him but he was busy sexting prince the librarian.
oh yeah makes sense then. Lets hit up the bar or something.
We walk into the bar an get shots or something idk
leo the bartneder makes an absolute shit beer pour and victor starts strangling him
wow isnt that police brutality
Im pretry sure that guy isnt actually a policeman. Lik hes larping or somwthing.