synopsis; jungkook wants to make your first date special and unlike any other night youâve had before. while determined to win your heart over with a fancy, romantic dinner that includes sweet, tasty chardonnay and medium rare steaks, not everything goes according to his plan.
pairing; boyfriend! jungkook x model! female reader
word count; 4.1k
genre; fluff, baby angst probably
warnings; none
timeline; this drabble is set 7 years ago, at the very start of the over wine coupleâs relationship where jungkook is a finance major and oc is still active in the modelling industry. theyâre both in their early 20s here!
authorâs note; a thank you drabble for all the support and encouragement iâve been receiving the past two weeks!! also a lil drabble for the people who arenât a fan of angst and still punched through that 38k last chapter :) enjoy this little tidbit of the start their relationship before it all became messy and went downhill
series masterlist | over wine universe
The sound of the lively chatter at the tables surrounding you had gone over your head before. The clinking of cutlery amplifies and bubbles of laughter fill the air the moment Jungkook excuses himself to the bathroom and all of a sudden, you watch yourself become a nerve-wrecking mess, unsure what to do the minute youâre left alone and forced to listen to the couples at the tables on your sides. You can feel their eyes on you, noticing the way they keep glancing at you with some sort of pity in their eyes. The bustling restaurant suddenly feels much more crowded and you canât help but feel exposed with him now gone, the bill at your table staring back at you like it tells you everything Jungkook didnât have the balls to say.Â
Itâs only when the waitress comes back a second time around when you finally search your handbag for your card and hand it to her, plastering a smile on your face that is supposed to copy the one you were previously wearing. You could tell she was getting impatient before, her hair tied into a bun so slick, you were sure she was unable to move the brows at her forehead.Â
Sheâs been eyeing you and Jungkook ever since you came in and sat down, it was hard not to notice, seeing the way her lips pursed as she tongued the front of her teeth when Jungkook ordered you the most expensive Chardonnay on the menu. And at the end, when he left for the bathroom about five seconds after he read the price at the bottom of the receipt, you could swear you saw a vein pop at her forehead. It was funny back then. Though now that heâs been gone for nearly ten minutes, each and every bit of humor has left your body just like you watched it happen to that woman before. The inkling feeling at your chest enlarges each time somebody locks eyes with you and shares that sorrowful, pitiful smile, and you lose it.
You had a good time tonight, that much you canât deny, and you refuse to be pitied. Especg not by a bunch of strangers. You know everyone at the restaurant had seen it at this point. Seen the way Jungkook had leaned over the table with crossed arms supporting him while that charming, boyish smile painted his face, resulting in a flush to your cheeks as you tried to hide it and blame it on the wine that must have gotten to your head. You felt luckier than anyone else in the room only half an hour ago, where you thought the dates around you couldnât compare. Like they couldnât have gotten better than yours by the end of the night.
Yes, embarrassment fills your chest when the waitress hands you back your card and flashes you a knowing smile. However, you refuse to let it bring you down. Humiliation draws over you as you stand up from your seat and make your way over to the corner Jungkook disappeared behind, each step of your stiletto heels to the restaurantâs floor tiles accentuating the flow of your mini dress against your ass. You know eyes are on you, but you ignore it and keep your head high. If you had driven here yourself, you probably would have let the guy rot in the menâs restroom until they had found him, though for now, you still need him for that twenty-minute ride back home.
And itâs not like you mind paying for tonightâs dinner. As a matter of fact, if Jungkook had simply asked you to cover the bill, you know you wouldâve reached out for your wallet without a second thought. He made you feel at ease from the start on; ensuring your beef was cooked to perfection, sitting you down on the booth while he did so on the chair. Even double checking whether or not your glass of Chardonnay was sweet enough to your liking, if you needed another napkin at your neck so you wouldnât stain that pretty little dress, and if you werenât getting cold right beneath that airconditioning screwed to the ceilingâready to run back to the car to get your jack from the backseat.
Thatâs right, you wouldnât have minded, because Jungkook has been perfect all night. And no matter how many times you thought to yourself âGod damn, youâre having a blast and so is he,â you wouldnât have minded if at the end of the night heâd be like, âhey, this probably isnât working out and we should never do this again.â Because, sure, then it is what it is. But at least youâve got more class than him if you think itâs a shitty thing to hide in the menâs restroom the moment the bill is served instead of growing a pair and telling you exactly that in your face.
ââHyung, please, I need you right now.ââ It is the first thing you hear once you round the corner and you come face to face with his back, his phone is held to his ear and it appears his fingers are pinching the bridge at his nose. ââItâs just that Iâm really into this girl, and I can swear she feels the same way. I canât afford fucking it up now. I promise Iâll pay you back by the end of the month, okay?ââ
It stings more than youâd like to admit. You lean against the wall, crossing your arms over your chest as you try to process the situation. Part of you wants to confront him right there, tell him the bill has been taken care of and ask him why he brought you here if he knew he couldnât even pay for it. He could at least tell you to stay within a reasonable budget, where the wine bottle didnât have to cost 400 bucks and each additional sauce wouldnât have to cost another 15 on top.
Would he be scared youâd judge him if he brought you some place else?
ââI know, I know,ââ he mumbles into his phone, throwing his head back. ââI didnât want to bring her somewhere downtown and disappoint her, thatâs all. How was I supposed to know the prices were that high if they donât write it down the menu?ââ
You have to bite your lip to hold the laughter from escaping. Itâs cute, the way he thinks, because the moment youâd see a menu without its prices mentioned, one thing most people would do is run out the building before they charge you for the lukewarm water thatâs already served on the table. You canât help but find his reasoning cute and endearing, his sincerity shining through and you can tell he truly wanted to make tonight special for you. The fact that he was worried about disappointing you speaks volumes about how much he cares. Although, next time around, youâd find him a little cuter if he were honest with you. You really wouldnât think much less of him if he asked you to pay the bill.
ââThanks, hyung. So much.ââ He breathes out, and you can only figure the person on the other end of the line is transferring the money to his bank account as you stand there. ââIâm dodging a bullet here.ââ
It is only when he hangs up the phone that he turns around, halting in his tracks at the sight of you standing there. With his phone still in hand, Min Yoongiâs contact number still displayed on the screen, his expression changes from shock to worry as he sees you standing there, arms folded over another as youâre leaned up against the wall.
ââHi.ââ You smile.
And you have the prettiest smile. Even though itâs closed lipped and seems a little ironic, he thinks you own the most beautiful smile in the room. ââHey,ââ he says, his eyes faltering even though heâs quick to cover up. Sauntering over, he places a hand at your hip to guide you the other way, over to the cashier. ââIâm sorry that took so long, you know how moms can be.ââ He snickers quietly, ââyouâre already two years into college and she still calls every night to ask if youâve eaten.ââ
You stand there, amused by his poor attempt to brush off the situation, His hand on your hip feels warm, and you find yourself swayed by his touch. ââOh, I see,ââ You play along, unable to suppress the playful glint in your eyes. ââSo it was your mom who kept you on the phone for so long? For a hot minute I thought you were bailing on me back here.ââ
Jungkook laughs softly, shaking his head. ââWith the way you look tonight? Iâd be crazy to.ââ His eyes linger on you, shamelessly sneaking down your figure in a long, exposed glance, appreciating the white mini dress that cuts right beneath your ass, accentuating your every curve. He doesnât even try to hide the boyish grin that works its way up his lips, the hand at your hip instead traveling to the small of your back.
Your cheeks flush a little at the compliment, and you turn to face him completely, a flat hand to his chest. ââSmooth talker,ââ you tease, head tilting sweetly as a rush of warmth flows through you.
He grins, his eyes sparkling mischievously. ââJust speaking the truth,ââ he replies, loving the way your eyes grow so big the moment he holds you close and you start looking up at him. He is still running his hand at your back in small circles as he subtly pulls you closer to him, loving the way you just let him. ââLetâs take care of the bill and get you home safely. Are we all set?ââ
You nod cutely, ââI am,ââ you say, and Jungkook guides you around by the waist, his free hand digging into the back pocket of his dress pants before you interrupt him, intertwining your arm with his as you lead the both of you out the door instead. ââAnd I already took care of it.ââ You teasingly whisper in his ear, the smile that you wear on your face undeniable.
Jungkookâs grin falters, halting in his tracks once youâre outside. His brows furrowed together, clearly taken aback. ââWait, you paid?ââ He asks softly, seeming a little deflated even as you stand before him with that pretty smile on your face. He usually canât resist to bring one out himself when your lips break into one, though it comes a little more difficult this time. ââYou know you didnât have to do that, right? I had everything planned out,ââ his hands come to cup your cheeks. ââIt was me who asked you out. That means that Iâm supposed to treat you tonight.ââ
You can see the sincerity in his eyes, and your heart softens at the genuine concern. It is only for a moment that you consider telling him you overheard his phone call with his roommate, and no matter how comfortable Jungkook made you feel tonight alone, you remember itâs only your first date, and youâd hate for things to get sappy so quickly. ââWell, you basically left me all alone with that piece of paper. How could I control myself?ââ Itâs supposed to be a lighthearted joke, he can see it in the way you smile at him, but he canât help but think thereâs some truth to it. ââCome on, bring me home,ââ even with the heels youâre wearing, you have to stand on your tippy toes to plant a kiss on his cheek. ââThese heels arenât doing me justice anymore.ââ
Jungkook chuckles softly, the tension not yet easing between you even as you drag him to the car by intertwining your hands together. As he opens the door for you to get in, he canât help but feel like heâs somehow failed todayâs date. Looking back at how it mustâve looked like when he ran off to call Min Yoongi for help like heâs still in highschool with a silly little school crush, he feels a pang of embarrassment at the thought of appearing so immature and unprepared in front of you. He wanted everything to be perfect, bring you someplace nice to impress you and show you he could treat you well. Instead, he just looks like a little boy who tried to trick you into paying for the first date.
Even as Jungkook is seated in the driversâ seat and takes the route back to your home, he turns up the volume of the radio, hoping to drown out the disappointment in himself. He definitely screwed up tonight. He doesnât even know if he wants you to say something to him; he just knows that you donât, but the glances you keep sneaking his way for the entire ride back home are enough to make him feel even worse. You can see that something is bothering him, that his playful, flirtatious vibe from before has shifted and is now replaced with something you canât decipher.
You start to wonder if itâs something you said. Wonder if heâs now getting cold feet and suddenly realizes maybe he didnât enjoy himself as much as you thought. He hadnât given you any reason to think like that, though. Not after how sweet he was tonight, not after the way you heard him talk about you over the phone with his friend.
As the car pulls up in front of your place, Jungkook turns off the engine, the radio cutting off as the silence envelopes both of you again. The clicking sound of your seatbelt comes fast and you glance over at him again, finding him already looking at you with a smile that doesnât quite meet his eyes.
He gets out and walks you to the door after that, his hands hidden in the pockets of his pants as he doesnât care to spare you another glance. The shift in energy is obvious between the both of you, not a single soul out on the street at this hour of the day to distract you from the uneasy silence. Your stiletto heels click against the pavement and you have to bite your bottom lip to make the short but uncomfortable way back a little more bearable.
At the end of a date comes a kiss. Itâs how it happens in all the romcoms you watchâit happens in all the chick flicks and all the Disney short movies. But this is no Stephanie Perkins love story, not with the way youâre standing there, hugging your arms as the chilly breeze crosses your skin.
ââI guess this is where we split ways, right?ââ You finally break the silence, your voice tinged with uncertainty. You donât want the night to end on such an awkward note, but the tension between you is undeniable.
Jungkookâs gaze softens, and he takes a step closer to you, the distance between your bodies diminishing. ââI had a great time tonight,ââ he admits, his voice gentle as he reaches to unfold your arms, fingertips grazing over them before they get to your soft hands and intertwines them with his own. ââAnd I really want to see you again,ââ he says quietly, thumbs rubbing over your knuckles. ââYou know, if thatâs okay with you.ââ
You have to tongue the front of your teeth in an attempt to hide that broad smile thatâs tugging at the edges of your lips. ââYeah, Iâd like that.ââ You say, and you can feel your heart race against your chest only with the way heâs looking down at you.
ââAnd Iâll be transferring the money right back to your account first thing back home, alright?ââ
ââOh,ââ you raise an eyebrow in surprise, not expecting him to bring up the topic of money again. ââReally, thatâs okay. I donât mind having to spend a little. And it doesnât really matter in the end, does it? We enjoyed ourselves tonight, and thatâs probably whatâs most important.ââ
ââIt is whatâs most important,ââ he agrees with a boyish smile, heavy lidded eyes staring back at you. ââBut it was me who asked you to join me for dinner. Therefore it was my responsibility to treat you, you know? To make sure you had a good time, and to guarantee the bill was taken care of and nowhere within your reach.ââ Jungkook says, one hand held against his chest as he tilts his head in the most charming way you can think of. ââThat was my mistake. But I wonât be able to go to bed with a good feeling knowing you paid for all that. We didnât dine at McDonaldâs, you know?ââ
You canât help but let out a soft chuckle at his playful reference, because heâs right. There was a lot more on that receipt than two cheeseburgers and fries on the side. Jungkook took you out to wine and dine; told you beforehand to wear the prettiest dress you own and he spared no expense to make sure the evening was special. It was clear he wanted to impress you, even if you hadnât overheard his phone call.
Your hands caress his chest until they reach to play with the collar of his blouse, as if to fix it. ââThen maybe itâs time we pick out some place thatâs a little more affordable, donât you think?ââ Youâre not nagging at him, your voice is gentle, indirectly telling him he doesnât need to spend money on you that he doesnât have. ââYou know Iâd be fine with a pizza and a soda, right?ââ
The feeling of your fingertips tickling at his neck makes him bite his lip, your arms leaning on his broad shoulders for support. ââYou know I canât take you out for pizza.ââ
You smile, enjoying the closeness between you when his own hands fall to your hips. Tugging you closer, just slightly. ââWhy not?ââ You tease, unable to keep that toothy smile off your face. ââI bet we could have just as much fun sharing a pizza as we did tonight.ââ
ââWe would,ââ Jungkookâs eyes meet yours, and he looks a little torn. ââBut youâre special,ââ his lips curl into a small smile when the words leave him, watching as you throw your head back a little in surprise, the warmth rising to your cheeks not gone unnoticed. ââAnd I donât know⊠itâs probably just something you do, but you make me want to give you all the things youâve never been given before, all right?ââ
Heâs speaking from the heart, and the longer he looks into those eyes of yours, the more this lovestruck feeling intensifies in the deepest pits of his chest. Because itâs true; Jeon Jungkook is smitten. You pick up his FaceTime calls in the middle of the night wearing silken, champagne pink Chanel pajamas, you carry your Miss Dior perfumes in the side pockets of your Armani handbags and your agent takes you out to fine dinings at least once a monthâyouâre handed all those luxury items by all sorts of brands trying to get a sponsor out of you because, they as well, know youâre something else. Something big.
You stand before him in a dress he doesnât even want to know the price of, and instead just wants to admire you. How was he ever going to step up his game and give you things you havenât seen before? Sure, perhaps Jungkook was a little starstruck the moment the price at the end of the bill caught his eye, but when it came to you, it was worth it. He doesnât make that kind of money yet, but he will, and when he receives his degree and finally does that, then yes, he wants to spoil you rotten. You deserve it all.
Your heart skips a beat at his words, touched by his genuine sentiment. ââJungkook,ââ you begin softly, your voice tinged with emotion. ââI had a blast tonight, I really did, and I appreciate you so much for the effort you put in the entire evening. But I really hope you didnât do all of this with the idea I would like you any less if it indeed was just a burger and some fries from McDonaldâs.ââ
Jungkookâs eyes soften. ââNo, thatâs not it at all,ââ he assures you, his voice gentle and sincere. ââI wanted to show you a good time, to make you smile.ââ
ââI smiled all the way to the end of the night,ââ you sing-song, leaning into his touch when you cup his cheeks. ââSo no S.O.S phone calls with Min Yoongi at the end of our next date night?ââ
He blinks slowly, shifting his gaze downward as a nervous chuckle escapes his lips. ââYou overheard my phone call,ââ you watch as the embarrassment overtakes him and you think itâs rather cute how he tries to hide his face from you, the sight of your feet suddenly so much more interesting. ââIsnât that great.ââ He mumbles, wincing on the inside.
ââI did. And thereâs nothing to be embarrassed of.ââ You tilt his head back up, forcing him to lock eyes. ââI actually think itâs kind of cute you wanted to impress me. Am I really that intimidating?ââ
Jungkookâs cheeks warm, and he canât help but let out a laugh at your teasing. His thumbs start caressing the material at the small of your back, leaving you a little weak in the knees. ââIntimidating isnât the right word,ââ he admits, pursing his lips like heâs thinking hard. ââIâd say youâre frightening. And not in a good way, either. Rather like one of those Disney villains that would keep you awake as a kid, you know?ââ He smirks cutely, playfully nudging at your side and causing you to squirm at his arms. ââUrsula or something. You look just like her, the big eyes and the crazy hair and all.ââ
ââDo I now?ââ You arch a single brow, amusement crippling at your lips.
He hums, tugging you close to him until your bodies are pressed together and you can feel his warmth radiating through his clothes. ââLike two beads of water.ââ He says a little softer now, his breath fanning against your lips as he reaches out to gently brush a loose strand of hair away from your face.
The space between you seems to shrink, the world around you fading into oblivion the more youâre drawn into him. ââYou wouldnât look at me as if you want to kiss me if that were true.ââ
Jungkookâs breath catches at your words, and he canât deny the truth in them. The teasing glint in your eyes sends a jolt of excitement through him, making him want to prove you wrong. His fingers gently trail along your jawline, a feather-light touch that sends shivers down your spine.
ââOh, really?ââ He retorts playfully, his voice low and husky. ââAnd what if I do want to kiss you?ââ His gaze intensifies, holding you captive as he leans closer, his lips almost brushing against yours. The air cackles with anticipation, and time seems to slow down as the world around you fades away.
Your heart pounds in your chest, matching the rhythm of his as he hovers so close. You can feel the warmth of his breath against your skin, and it sends a rush of desire through you. Your fingers instinctively find their way to his chest, the anticipation building between you both.
ââDo it and find out.ââ
He doesnât hesitate. Youâve given him the green light and with a surge of boldness running through him, he closes the distance between you, and his lips capture yours in a tender, passionate kiss. Itâs a perfect collision of desire, a moment that feels like it was meant to be.
You place a hand to his chest, able to feel the steady beat of his heart beneath your palm. With your fingers slightly curling at the nape of his neck, arm leaning on his shoulder, you dare to pull him closer to you as he copies your body language not much longer after. He pulls you by the small of your back to make sure it curves and youâre pressed chest to chest. Your breaths mingle, lips eagerly brushing against each other as the kiss deepens and you feel a tingling warmth spreading through your body. His touch is tender and possessive, as if he doesnât want to let you go. Your other hand finds its way to his cheek, caressing it with a soft, adoring touch. Itâs a silent reassurance that this is right, that you want this as much as he does.
Time seems to lose all meaning when his lips lingers on yours, it seems like. Youâre lost in him, just like how he is lost in you. And when you eventually pull away, your foreheads rest against each other, you both share a soft, contented sigh. Your eyes meet, and a knowing smile passes between you.
ââLetâs save the rest for our second date, yeah?ââ
Your heart is still racing, and his touch leaves your body feeling electric. You can see the desire in his eyes as gazes down at you, and with a gentle caress at his cheek, you nod in agreement, a playful glint in your eyes.
ââDefinitely,ââ you whisper, your voice breathless.
As you part ways, you fumble with your keys at the door as Jungkook makes his way back to his car. A sense of contentment washes over you, knowing youâve found someone who makes your heart race and your soul soar.
And as you steal a glance from over your shoulder only one last time for tonight, you find him doing the same thing at the exact same moment. Your eyes meet, and you cutely avert your eyes back forward the moment it happens, missing the way he bites his bottom lip to hold back a cheeky grin, shaking his head in amusement.
âwhen obnoxiously rich and spoiled frat boy jeon jungkook comes up to you one day and asks you to fake date him for money, you definitely should have said no. because before you knew it, you were going on insta dates with him and having lunch with his equally obnoxiously rich and spoiled friends.â
â genre:Â sexual themes, angst, fluff, fratboy! AU, fake dating! AU, college! AU, rich kid! AU, enemies to lovers! AU
â pairing: jungkook x female reader
â word count: 17.966
â warnings: swearing/cursing, alcohol consumption, jealousy, no communication skills whatsoever
â playlist: to be added
â a/n: after almost two years of no update its done. it would be a lie to say that i was always one hundred percent sure this was gonna see the light of day but its finally here, and im so so so happy to just put it out there and give it to you guys. @koocycle has listened to me bitch abt this one so much so thanks to her, also for kinda inspiring me to get back into tumblr.com and writing !! enjoy!! and once again, this is inspired by To All The Boys Iâve Loved Before by Jenny Han!
âYouâre really showing your wealth, you know?â you said as Jungkook slid into the driverâs seat, shutting out the cold air. He raised a brow, handing you the bag for you to hold onto, shivering slightly from the cold, his neck exposed to the harsh wind.
âHow so?â
The engine sputtered to life as he slotted in the keys, his phone mounted to the dashboard, showing him the way. You pulled out the one-hundred-dollar expensive wine bottle from the bag, scrutinising it. Some of the glitter from the red ribbon the salesman had wrapped around it in an effort to be more festive and fitting todayâs occasion peeled off.Â
âThis is too much.â
âYeah, I know, the bowâs tacky but I couldnât stop Kangjoon from-â
âNo, I mean the hundred bucks you dropped on it. It shows your wealth,â you repeated, scrunching your nose. âAlso, didnât know you were on a first name basis with the salesman.â
You let the bottle slip back into its bag, scared Jungkook was going to make a sharp stop and cause you to drop and waste the bottle. God knows you didnât have one hundred bucks casually lying around like himâeven though you were sure Jungkook wouldnât make you replace it and would definitely just buy it again himself.
âWhat? Donât tell me you didnât like Kangjoon? Heâs a great man, very competent.â And just as you were about to tell him that Kangjoon scammed him, Jungkook continued, âAlso isnât that the whole reason why youâre dating me? My wealth?âÂ
He said it with a grin, turning to you as he let a family of four pass, receiving a thankful hand raise from both of the parents as they ushered their young children across the street. And even though he meant it purely as a joke, his smile and tone indicating as much, his words made you scrunch your face like youâd been stung by a bee.Â
âItâs so unnecessary. We wouldnât know the difference between this and supermarket wine, and Chae literally said not to bring anything. Sheâs gonna scold you, you know?â
If it had gone your way, youâd have gotten the second cheapest bottle of semi-fancy alcohol they had and called it a day but Jungkook swiped his card before you could intervene, ever so easily charmed. Well, actually if it had gone your way at all, you wouldnât have brought anything to begin with. Chaeyoung hated it if her guests brought anything anyway.
âGotta impress your friends, donât I? Canât have them not like me,â he argued, and you rolled your eyes.
âFirst of all, no, you donât-â
âYou donât want your friends to like your boyfriend?â Jungkook gasped, staring at you with his mouth agape and eyes wide as you came to a stop in front of a red light. You shook your head.
âNo, can I speak?â you sighed, frowning as Jungkook laughed, clearly getting his kick out of annoying you. âMy friends already like you, and you know that. Weâre driving to Jiâs and Chaeâs place now for a Christmas party. One that you were explicitly invited to. So I donât believe you for a second when you say that you got this wine to impress them. Also, Chae said not to bring anything. You just like spending money.â
Jungkook pursed his lips, trying and failing to hide a grin. âDo I now?â
âOkay, maybe youâre right,â he admitted. âBut just so you know, I gladly spent my money on that wine if it means Iâll impress your friends and make them like me more. And Iâm even more than happy to spend it on you, cabbage.â
He looked at you by the end of his words, flashing you a grin. A grin that made him look so pretty and adorable, that would have made your knees buckle if you hadnât been sitting, that wrapped your heart into his grip even tighter. A grin that made you wonder if a parachute would be enough to stop your fall for him, or if you were simply doomed for this fate, for the bone crushing landing.
You turned your head to the window, glad to see you had made it to Jisooâs and Chaeyoungâs place.
âI think youâre just happy to have an excuse to spend your money,â you mumble, pretending to busy yourself with the straps of the bag.
âSureââ There was a shrug, and you should have prepared yourself for the worst, should know better by now that Jungkook couldnât just agree with you and leave you in peace. ââor youâre just the love of my life, cabbage, and whatâs mine is yours.â
The words remained casual on Jungkookâs tongue, easy as ever. And they remained difficult and frown-inducing for you.Â
âYouâre-!â
A laugh bubbled up from Jungkookâs upon your silence, and though you were trying your deepest and most desperate to resist, your heart skipped a beat. It was fatal, cardiologists would say. How deeply youâd fallen, it was fatal. Your heart couldnât be saved.
And as if he hadnât said the most impossible thing ever, Jungkook pulled into the parking lot and turned off the engine, a grin plastered on his lips.
âAlright, letâs-â
You yanked the door open, stepping (of course) in a puddle. With a groan and wince, you slammed the door shut. Your breath came out white and cloudy, December coming into its full swing. The weather had been harsher than everâwind dragging on your skin until it was painful and tense, air cold enough to dry out your throat and mouth, every window coloured a milky white, and clouds hanging far and wide in the sky for every hour of the day. The urge to crawl back into the oh so warm car was strong. The urge to run away from Jungkook however was just that much stronger.Â
The bottle bumped your hip bone as you rushed towards Jisooâs and Chaeyoungâs apartment building. You didnât turn around as Jungkook called after you to wait with a laugh, fumbling to unhook his phone from the dashboard.Â
You reached the glass front door rather quickly, a handprint smudged across it that hadnât been there last time. You cringed, but couldnât think about it too much, worrying a lot more about the diminishing distance between Jungkook and you as you waited for one of your friends to open the stupid door for you. You knew for a fact they were already there, spotting Hoseokâs car parked on the side of the street. If he was there, Jimin was too, always catching a ride with him.
âDo you really think you can outrun me?â Jungkook called out, just a dozen steps behind you.Â
You pulled on the front door as if it made a difference, pressing the bell repeatedly. He slowed his walk, burying his hands into his pockets. All so very smug. Your features twisted into a frown.Â
âYouâre so slow. You always run from me as if I wonât catch up with you in two-â
For once fate seemed to be on your side, the buzzer cutting through the air. The door almost hit you in the face when you yanked it open. You slammed it back shut again, just right in front of Jungkookâs nose. He pulled on the handle. The lock had clicked in. You watched his features twist as he realised he was too slow. His lips pressed together, curling inwards as he watched the biggest and proudest grin spread on yours.
âWhat were you saying? About me being too slow?â you said. A smile tucked on the corners of his mouth as he shook his head at you.
âOpen up.â
He knocked on the glass, right in front of your nose.
âWhat? I canât hear you.â
You put your hand to your ear, tilting your head.
âJust open up.â
âYou gotta speak louder. I really canât hear you with this door between-â
âCabbage, you better open the door for me now, or Iâm gonna make you regret it,â Jungkook said, narrowing his eyes, tongue poking in his cheek. And even though you were certain it was an empty threatâhow was he going to make you regret it?â, you contemplated for just a second if maybe you should listen and open the door.Â
âIâm gonna count to three.â
You scoffed. Were you a kid? And even more so, what was Jungkook going to do to you? Were you going to cave because of an empty threat?Â
âPlease do,â you smiled, eliciting one from Jungkook himself.
âThree.â
He raised a brow.
âTwo.â
You folded your arms in front of your chest.
âOne.â
A moment passed.Â
Nothing happened.
âAlright, fine,â Jungkook said before dramatically ringing the bell. And even though you rolled your eyes, you did inch back. He was going to chase you, that one was for sure.Â
The moment the buzzer rang, you took off. Jungkook let out a laugh.
âNow, you run?â he taunted, pulling the door open, his steps echoing through the hallway. You took two stairs at a time, yelping when you realised that Jungkook was hot on your tail. Maybe you should have run earlier. Or maybe you should have opened the door for him. But who were you, letting a guy threaten you? No less Jungkook of all people, that idiot.
You made it up the flight of stairs faster than you ever had, your lungs lit on fire. The front door already stood ajar for you. You could distantly hear Chaeyoung call out for Jisoo- A hand wrapped around your waist and pulled you back. Jungkook stood right in front of you, chest bumping into you, the biggest grin on his lips.
Shit.
âGotcha.â
Your face soured.
âOh, h-how are you?â you coughed with a smile, and he chuckled, never taking his eyes off of you even as he grabbed the bag from your hands and placed it down. You had completely forgotten about it. âDonât look at me like this. T-thatâs not fun.â
âNeither was having the door slammed in my face.âÂ
You backed into the wall. Turns out being tough was a lot more difficult when there wasnât a door to shield you and Jungkook was actually in front of you, just centimetres from your face and staring at you like you were his favourite thing in this entire world. His hand sneaked around your waist, slipping underneath your sweater, fingers grazing the small of your back. His touch was light and delicate, teasing in all the right ways. It was cold too, making you arch and almost wince. And it was all too muchâa tingle spreading across your back, rushing straight to your heart.
âAny last words before I make you regret it?â Jungkook hummed, and you should snort and laugh because he should sound ridiculous. But somehow, his words made you tense, the mere thought making your head spin in rounds and rounds. You bit on your tongue, silencing any sound that might just want to crawl up your throat.
You shouldnât let Jungkook be this close to you. You needed distance for your sanity. But you couldnât bring it over your heart to push him away. You didnât have it in you. Not when there was very much a part of you that wanted to find out what Jungkook exactly meant.
He drank you up with his eyes, gaze dark and full of something hazy. Full of something you couldnât pinpoint. But you loved it, you did. Maybe a little too much even. You loved the way it made your heart thump and rumble in your chest, made you forget that this was too much and far and dangerous, that Jungkook and you should keep your distance because in just a few weeks all of this would be over and youâd go your merry ways. But right now, with your back against the wall and Jungkook caging you in, thrill and excitement rushing through every single one of your cells, you couldnât stop. You didnât think you ever could.
âGot nothing to say now, cabbage?â
And when you still wouldnât respond, he smiled. His face inched closer to yours, his nose brushing yours. Your fingers itched to hold onto something, onto him, curling and uncurling in the air. Because you shouldnât, you really shouldnât. But you did, hands gripping his sweater as if you were lost in the sea and he was all you had to cling to.Â
You closed your eyes, anticipating and waiting for Jungkook to kiss you, your breath stuck in your chest. Any time now. It was going to happen-
âOh my God, please donât do this in my hallway.â
You whipped your head around, your heart dropping to the floor. Jisoo stood in the doorway, face twisted in utter disgust.
âPlease, anywhere but my fucking hallway. That's all Iâm gonna be able to think about. Seeing the two of you eating each otherâs faces.â
There was even clearer disgust in her voice.
Oh God.
âHello, Ji,â Jungkook smiled, and you expected him to back away from you, but he gave you no distance. He wasnât even the slightest embarrassed, if anything you sensed the slightest annoyance swinging with his words.
âPlease step away from her, Kook,â Jisoo asked, gesturing for him to move backwards. But he wasnât all too eager to follow, staying cemented right in front of you, hands still around your waist. He paused to think.
âIâve got a really expensive bottle of wine.â He pointed to the bag. âIâll give it to you in exchange for five more minutes.â
âOh, you brought something? Chaeâs gonna kill you,â Jisoo laughed before changing her tune, tilting her head to the side. âBut how expensive are we talking?â
âLike one hundred bucks.â
You stared holes into Jungkook, mouth agape. You couldnât believe what you were hearing. Were you not right here too? Did you become air? It was like you were cattle being sold off.Â
âOh,â Jisoo gasped before shrugging. âOkay, deal-â
âYeah, no way,â you laughed before doing what you should have done earlierâyou pushed Jungkook away, making him tumble backwards a little. You stepped around him.Â
âBut, Y/N, itâs one hundred-â
âJi!â you gasped, making her laugh and reach out for you. She wrapped her arms around your neck, giggling as she did.Â
âIâm kidding. Iâm kidding. I would never,â she told you, and you raised a brow at her. âRight, Kook?â
âYeah, we were just kidding.â
âI donât- hey! I can see you two exchanging looks!â you gasped, neither of the two even trying to be subtle. âDo you think Iâm blind?â
âHa, funny, I think-â Jisoo cleared her throat. ââI think Chae is calling for me? Oh my God, do you hear that? Yes, Iâm on my way, Chae!â
And as if she hadnât just stabbed you in the back, she slipped inside. But not without grabbing the bag and thanking Jungkook for it. You rolled your eyes, turning to head inside when he cleared his throat.
Jungkook was staring at you with his brows raised, clearly expecting⊠something.Â
âWhat?â you barked. He gave you a smile before stretching out his hand. You groaned. âSeriously? We have to get inside-â
But he waved his hand around, not budging. Rolling your eyes and with a long exhale, you took his hand into yours.Â
âYouâre a child-â
Jungkook pulled you towards him, shutting you up with a kiss. One hand cupped your cheek and the other rested on the small of your back, pushing you into him. The kiss was tender and soft, gentle and light. And still, it was enough to have your heart thumping louder and harder in your chest than ever before. You asked yourself if Jungkook could feel it at all. That heart of yours that was oh so tight in his grip. That heart of yours that was bleeding in your chest. That heart of yours already ached at the thought of this all ending in just a few weeks.Â
It was a lovely kiss, a devastatingly lovely kiss.
And when Jungkook pulled away, his eyes so full and beautiful, you felt gutted and empty. Because this meant nothing to him. This meant nothing at all. You looked away. Jungkook laughed, pulling you flush to his side, all too unaware.
âLetâs go?â
You nodded slightly.Â
Jimin was first to greet you, leaping up from the couch and pulling you into a hug. âYou made it!â
âTook you long enough,â Taehyung mumbled, sipping on his beer, earning himself a look from Namjoon that he simply ignored. âWe could hear you two yelling around in the hallway.â
âMerry Christmas to you too, Tae,â Jungkook laughed, and the older one frowned at him.Â
âItâs December 10th.â
âIn other words, itâs almost-â
âNo, itâs not-â
Hoseok greeted you with a hug, ignoring Taehyungâs and Jungkookâs bickering because otherwise he would never get to say hello to you. âLooking good.â
âThanks.â You stared at his sweater. âThatâs one really ugly Christmas sweater.â
He laughed, thanking you. Seokjin and Namjoon were next to give you a quick hug, followed by Jennie and Yoongi, exchanging a few words with each of them. Taehyung and you stared at each other for a few seconds, neither of you saying anything. And though he tried to hide it, a smile formed on his lips. A smile you could only return. You blamed it on the holidays. They made you especially sappy and sentimental.
You were first to reach out. Taehyung reciprocated the hug. It was a little awkward and short and one-armed. It was more than anyone could ask of you. Jungkook nodded in both amazement and approval when you caught his eyes for a split second, and you just scrunched your nose at him.
âWhereâs Chae?â you asked Jisoo when she came up next to you, both of you standing in front of the Christmas tree.Â
âOh, you know-â
âAh, great, you guys finally made it as well,â Chaeyoung exhaled, coming out from the kitchen, and seeing Jungkook and you among the other guests. There was a slight edge accompanying her words, and you doubted for no second that her nerves were running high from having to host tonight and needing all of this to turn out perfect. (Even if she chose this fate upon herself.) Her updo was falling apart, strands sticking out in the wrong places. Still, she looked pretty. Especially with her reindeer apron tied around her waist. She had had it since middle school, and seeing it brought back all kinds of memories. You couldnât help but grin, Jisoo and you exchanging looks. And when your gaze met Chaeoyungâs, she knew. She rolled her eyes, shaking her head.Â
âYeah, I know,â she mumbled, speaking to you too only and confusing the others in the process. Jisoo and you snickered.Â
âAnywayââ Chaeyoyung waved her hand around, ââIâve got some unfortunate news. Dinner isnât ready. Iâll need at least another thirty minutes. Hope you guys didnât come too hungry.â
âDo you need help with anything?â Jungkook asked, already getting up from the couch. Yoongi raised his hand, silently extending the offer as well. Jennie nodded, clearly willing to get her hands dirty too.
âYeah, anything we can do to help you?â Taehyung asked, making an effort to get up too, but Chaeyoung was quick to shake her head.
âNo, I donât need help,â she mumbled, clearing her throat. âI just wanted to inform you guys. You all would help if you guys just busied yourself and didnât come into the kitchen.â
And before anyone could insist on their help, Chaeyoung disappeared back inside the kitchen.
âShouldnât we-?â
âIf you wanna stay on her good side, donât take a single step into the kitchen. Donât even breathe in that direction, or think about helping her,â Jisoo explained, and Jungkook looked at you as if to ask if this was exaggerated at all.
âYeah, Chaeâs⊠very peculiar with that kind of stuff.â
âBut there are so many of us. Is she really gonna do all of it on her own?â Jennie asked, but Hoseok waved her off.Â
âTrust me, she is and she will. Chae gets super stressed, but she also loves to host. If you donât let her, sheâll be in a bad mood for ages. Itâs better to just let her do her own thing.â
âAnd if it actually gets too much, sheâll come out and ask for help at one point. Trust me,â Jimin added.
âYou think? Iâm not so sure about that one,â Jisoo snorted and moved over to grab a handful of chocolates. Almost instinctively, she placed a hand on Jennieâs shoulder, and for a moment, you wondered if Jungkook and you ever looked this natural and comfortable with each other. If you looked as much as a couple as Jisoo and Jennie did. âWhen has she ever asked for help?â
âThereâs no way she can do all of this on her own,â Taehyung said, frowning.
âYou donât know Chae.â
âMaybe. But it seems humanly impossible to pull off this entire thing without asking for at least some help.â
Jisoo raised her brow at Taehyung, pausing a moment. âOh, do you wanna bet?â Her mouth pulled into a grin at the mere prospect of making some easy money. âTen bucks?â
Hoseok and you exchanged glances over their heads. This was very much typical of Jisoo.Â
âDonât bet with her, Tae. Sheâs a scammer,â Jimin said, pushing Jisooâs hand away as she waited for him to shake it.
âI wonât,â Taehyung laughed, taking a sip from his beer. âYou know I donât do-â
The ear-shattering sound of a pan clashing with the kitchen tiles emerged from the kitchen, followed up with a few loud curses and an âItâs fine!â. You cringed when something else you couldnât identify fell to the floor a second later, eliciting even more curses. Almost instinctively, you turned to Jisoo, nudging her. Because as much as she was right that it was a bad idea to go help Chaeyoung, it would actually be worse not to go in right now when everything seemed to go off the rails.
âYeah, yeah, I know. My cue to jump in,â she grumbled, begrudgingly making her way to the kitchen, knowing already she would have to endure Chaeyoungâs snappy attitude. She squeezed Jennieâs hand in goodbye.Â
âSee, sheâs getting help,â Taehyung said to no one in particular and righteously took a sip from his beer. Jungkook applauded him sarcastically, and you were about to say something when-
âOh, this is cute!â Seokjin gasped, coming up to you. You followed his gaze to the bauble he was admiring. It had an old picture of you and your friends on it, faces curving around the porcelain. âHow old are you guys there?â
You pursed your lips. âThatâs probably senior year? So like seventeen maybe? Eighteen?â
âWhat are you guys doing- oh my God, you guys look so young.â Namjoon hooked an arm around Seokijnâs shoulder, marvelling at your younger selves. âLook at that one!â
He pointed out one with just Jisoo, Chaeyoung and you on it. It was one of the first pictures you three had taken together. All three of you still stuck in middle school. You couldnât decide whether to be embarrassed or nostalgic.
âIs that Ji? Her hair, oh my God!â Seokjin laughed, pointing out the blunt bob Jisoo used to rock.
âDonât be mean!â And yet, Namjoon laughed too.
âYouâre lucky Ji canât hear you right now because sheâd kill you,â you said. âBut actually, you should see some of Seokâs old pictures. He looks so different-â
A hand snaked around your waist. You tensed. But you relaxed a second later when you realised who it was. You peeked over your shoulder just to check and smiled when you turned out to be right. He placed his chin on your shoulder.
âHello,â Jungkook whispered, and you squirmed, his breath tickling your ear. He was so close to you, too close. You could practically feel his heart beating behind yours.
âHey,â you returned, a bit breathless and pitchy. You cleared your throat.
âWhat are you guys doing?â
âOh, uh, nothing really,â you mumbled, waving your hand around.
Jungkook frowned, but didnât ask any further. âOkay, well, I wanted to get you something to drink. You think I can go into the kitchen without getting murdered?â
âYeah, youâre fine. Jiâs there too,â you said, glancing over your shoulder to meet his gaze. He was already looking at you, eyes big and so full and a smile on his lips.
âOkay, then do you want anything in particular?â
You shook your head. âUh, no, whatever is fine.â
âWhatever it is.â
But rather than just leave to get you said drink, Jungkook lingered, not moving away from you just yet. You raised a brow at him, making him smile. As if he could read your mind, he loosened his grip around your waist, but not before pressing a kiss to your neck.
âGetting you that drink,â he smiled, backing away.Â
You touched a hand to where he had kissed you, gripping, feeling hot all of a sudden. It was stupid, you were stupid.Â
âJesus.â
And albeit, it was quiet and muttered under his breath, you heard it very clearly. You looked at Seokjin, eyes big as he stared back at you with a grin on his lips. There was a fondness in his eyes, a look you always saw on Jiminâs face. Namjoon wore it too.
âWhat?â you asked when the expression wouldnât disappear.
âItâs just-âÂ
He sighed and shook his head.
âWhat?â you repeated, but Seokjin wouldnât continue.
âYou guys are just cute,â Namjoon supplied.
âOh, please,â you scoffed, shaking your head.
âYou guys are exactly like Jin and Mina used to be,â Yoongi said, coming up next to you, having witnessed the entire exchange from his spot on the couch.
âWhat?â you laughed, shaking your head over and over again. âI have no idea what-â
âDonât deny it, Y/N,â Namjoon laughed and looked at you.
âItâs gross really,â Yoongi scoffed, taking a sip from his beer. âHow smitten he is for you. How happy andââ He shuddered for the drama of it all but wore a smile on his lips. ââstupidly in love you two are.â
Wait, what?
âItâs cute,â Seokjin corrected, and you stared at him with stunned silence.Â
âIs it though?â
âDonât be like that, Yoongs. When have you ever seen Kook this happy before?âÂ
The question, though not directed at you at all, made you freeze. And when you looked at Yoongi and he made no effort to disagree, you froze.
âYou make him really happy,â Namjoon said with a smile and tilted his head when you didnât speak or react at all, giving your shoulder a light squeeze. âYou know that, right?â
His words hit you like a ton of bricks, crashing down on you and compressing your lungs. Because, no, you didnât. You didnât think about it ever, and why would you? It never seemed possible to you because it simply wasnât possible you made Jungkook happy. You didnât have that power over him.
Was this really how you looked like to othersâtwo people who were in love and happy? It sounded ridiculous to you, impossible. So much so, you just had to shake your head and wave your hand around as if the words loomed in front of you and had to be physically dismissed. Your heart banged in your ribcage, loud and far too heavy.
âYou guys are exaggerating!â you chuckled, voice wavering the slightest bit. âThis has nothing to do with me- Finals are over and itâs Christmas, so obviously-â
A single look from them was all it took to silence you. They didnât have to say a word for you to know what they were collectively thinking.
âY/N, donât be ridiculous,â Seokjin said.
âFor godâs sake, just look at that boy,â Yoongi laughed, pointing behind you, and your gaze followed his hand. Right then Jungkook came back with two drinks, one for you and one for him.Â
He seemed surprised, stilling as he saw that you were all looking at him. But he recovered, mouth pulling into a big smile. Your eyes met his. You would have missed it if you hadnât looked so close and paid attention to every little thing he did. But you saw it, the tiny smile he offered you, and only you. It was like a little secret. Just for you and him to know and share and see.Â
Did you really make him happy?
âWhy are you guys staring at me like that?â Jungkook laughed, coming to a stop in front of you and handing you your drink. You took it passively, and purely from the warmth, you knew it was your favourite, green tea. âAre you guys talking shit about me?â
âOh, yeah, you know just the usual shit talking we do about you,â Namjoon snorted.
âMhm, the usual stuff. How you always-â
Seokjinâs voice faded away when Jungkook moved closer to you, his arm already lifting to sneak around your middle. But you couldnât do this. Not now.
âSorry, I gotta pee,â you mumbled, wringing out of Jungkookâs grasp, his fingers just barely brushing your skin. You didnât know who you interrupted, but you offered them all an apologetic look but you never quite looked at Jungkook. Your exit seemed natural enough though, you thought. No one made an effort to stop you.
Some of your drink spilt over when you put it down on the coffee table too quickly, and you even almost bumped into Hoseok, but rather than apologise properly and clean up your mess, you hurried into the bathroom.Â
The moment the lock clicked shut behind you, you let yourself crumble, knees giving in. If only just a little.Â
Oh God.
It wasnât very environmentally friendly, not very Save the Turtles! kind of behaviour of you at all as you just let the water run and run into the sink and down the drain. You didnât even wash your hands or face, just needing something to fill the silence as you sat on the edge of the bathtub and let yourself calm down.
You felt ridiculous. You truly did. Insane and crazy even. The behaviour you were exhibiting was probably therapist worthy. The panic. For what? And why? It was behaviour you never imagined yourself exhibiting. No less because of Jeon Jungkook. But here you were, playing his pretend girlfriend for money so he could win a bet. And you got all of your friends involved even! You should have really thought this through-
âCabbage?â
And somehow, both dread and warmth crept up with his voice. You closed your eyes, thinking for a second to shut off the tap. It seemed just a little too exhausting to do that.
âYeah?âÂ
âAre you good?â
âYeah.â
It was quiet for a few seconds.
âCan I come in?â
âIâm peeing, Jeon.â
A lie. He knew. You knew.
âFine, come in.â
When you wouldnât move, Jungkook gave the door handle a try, surprised to see you hadnât locked it. You had forgotten, and so he did it for you instead. The moment he saw you sitting on the edge of the bathtub with the tap carelessly running, he stopped, features folding into something nice, pleasant, empathetic.
âStop,â you groaned, rolling your eyes and turning away from him, shutting off the tap as if that minimised how sad you had to look right now.
Jungkook chuckled, burying his hands into his pants, carefully walking towards you. He sat down next to you, knee pressed against yours. Neither of you pulled away. There was a part of you that should tell him to give you space, but you couldnât. If anything, you turned a little to him.
âHow are you always running off into the bathroom when you feel bad? Itâs so obvious,â he mumbled, pinching your nose.
âOw, stop!â you hissed, swatting his hand aside.Â
He gave you a look, shaking his head, and you pouted like a child would. It made him chuckle, and you tensed when Jungkook put his head on yours, too tall to lean against your shoulder comfortably, his eyes falling shut.Â
âWhat did they say?â Jungkook asked, breaking the silence after a while.
âWhat?â
âJoon and the others. What did they say to make you run off like that?â
You pressed your lips together, disliking that you were so easy to read.
âWho sent you?â you snorted, wanting to figure out which of your friends just earned themselves a plus point.
âNo one.â
âWhat?â you blinked, and looked at him, but he kept his eyes closed. âSo you-â
âNo one sent me. I just⊠wanted to make sure you were fine myself.â
And hearing that was somehow utterly awful. Because it meant Jungkook cared. At least to some degree, at least enough to want to check on you. It meant that he was able to read you so easily, that he really knew you.
âNow, what did they say? You can tell me. Iâll talk to them for you. Or I wonât if you donât want me-â
You shook your head, sighing. âNothing. They said nothing.â
It was true. Because none of what Namjoon, Seokjin, and Yoongi said was worth running off. It wasnât insulting, or hurtful.Â
âAre you sure? Seriously, you can just tell me. Iâd talk to-â
âIâm serious,â you interrupted, not even wanting to hear how far Jungkook would go for you. âThey said nothing. I just had to pee.â You shrugged. âAnd I just needed a moment to breathe. Itâs nothing. I promise.â
Jungkook sat up, glancing at you with his mouth pursed and eyes narrowed. âSo just a moment to breathe?â
Your hand almost came up to cup his cheek, the urge to brush over the little scar on his cheekbone tempting you. It was difficult to resist when he was looking at you like that. There was this need, to plant your lips against his. Kiss him and assure him. But you didnât let yourself. You turned your head to the other side, curling your hand around the cool porcelain of the bathtub until the skin stretched thin over your knuckles and almost hurt. Just anything but Jungkook and his stupidly pretty face.
âJust a moment to breathe,â you mumbled.Â
Jungkook hummed, straightening up. He let his head hang for a few seconds before lifting it up again and turning to you.
âIs it fine if I stay with you then?â
It was a delicate question, an honest question, a devastating heartbreaking question. Because of course, he could. Of course! He could do anything, as long as he remained by your side. And that realisation, albeit not entirely new to you (you were aware of it to some degree all along), was mortifying.Â
You closed your eyes, a knot forming in your throat. There was nothing for you to say, a silence stretching between you. A silence Jungkook took as a âyesâ, and when his hand gripped yours, it was sealed for you. You didnât pull away, put your head on his shoulder. What would be the use of resisting? What good would it do? What would it change? Nothing.
So you enjoyed it instead, the moment between him and you. For as long as you could. For now.
âWe should probably get back out,â you mumbled when you heard the laughter get louder in the living room.Â
âProbably.â
And yet, neither of you moved. A few more moments passed. It was the next bound of laughter that ripped you out.
âWe should-â
âI think itâs time-â
You both stopped, nodding, knowing. Jungkook was first to get up, groaning like an old man before turning to you and offering you his hand. With one loud sigh, you took it, allowing him to pull you up. You shared a look and a smile.
It felt like you were walking into another world when you stepped outside, still holding hands. Before it was just Jungkook and you. Now it was everyone else too. And almost as if you had said that exact thought out loud, everyone looked at you as you walked back in. You stopped, the same way Jungkook had when he had returned and found you all staring at him. You frowned, the grin spreading on Jiminâs and Jisooâs (When had she made it back?) faces worrying you. Jungkook seemed as clueless as you.
âWhat?â
No one said anything for a second.Â
âCan I?â Jisoo asked, pleading with everyone else, and you narrowed your eyes. She was giddy, and her being giddy was never a good sign, especially for you. Most times it meant youâd be miserable.
âDo the honours,â Jimin said, gesturing for her to ahead.
Jisoo leaned back, grinning from ear to ear. She seemed to stretch the moment thin, take her sweet time to reveal to you what exactly entertained her so much. Jennie shook her head next to her, but she wore a smile on her lips, amused.
You kept close to Jungkook, almost instinctively. As if he could protect you. His hand brushed the small of your back, soothing. Taehyungâs irritating snicker grabbed your attention for a second, but before you could frown at him for it, Jisoo spoke,
âLook up.â
Fuck. You should have figured.
âAh,â Jungkook laughed upon seeing the mistletoe above your heads.Â
âYou guys are funny,â you scoffed, shaking your head. âAnd very cute for thinking that we are gonna do-â
âYou have to!â Jimin interjected, leaning forward and pointing at the two of you. âItâs the law. The rules of the game.â
You frowned, and the lines deepened even more when you saw everyone from Namjoon, Seokjin and Jennie to Taehyung, Hoseok, Yoongi and Jisoo nodding along. Of course, they found pleasure in your misery.Â
âItâs bad luck if you donât,â Hoseok reminded you of the stupid rules, and you could have thrown something at him. How was no one on your side?
âThatâs⊠made up.â
âWell, if you wanna risk the bad luck, be my guest,â Hoseok chuckled, shrugging, and you rolled your eyes.Â
âOh, please, no one believes that!âÂ
But you were met with no ounce of support from anyone. You turned to Jungkook, expecting that he was equally as ticked off as you. But he seemed perfectly fine, his features not even slightly twisted into anything resembling irritation. If anything, he was smiling a little when you met his eyes.Â
âI donât know, Iâm never one to tempt fate,â he said, and you couldnât quite decide how to react. Jungkook reached for your hand again, playing with your fingers. âWhy risk the bad luck? Also, itâs not like we have never kissed in front of them.â He grinned. âRemember how you jumped me and-â
âOh my God, I didnât jump you!â Your voice leapt up a few pitches too high and remained there when your friends began to laugh.
âNow thatâs a lie. You practically threw yourself at-â
âJeon!â
Jungkook cackled, and you could have strangled him right then and there. Your friends laughed too, and you would have snapped at them if your cheeks didnât warm to an uncomfortable degree. To the point the blood boiled in your ears, so much so you didnât even hear Namjoonâs holler about how it was just a kiss!
It wasnât completely lost on you that it was stupid to be embarrassed, considering how boldly you had claimed Jungkook as yours in front of a room of strangers just a few weeks ago. Especially considering that all of your friends had a slight alcohol level going on anyway already and were most definitely moving on the second the kiss happened. But it was different. At the Halloween party, you were positively buzzed, your vision blurry and fuzzy. But more importantly, you were jealous to the point of turning green. It seemed so much more intimate to kiss Jungkook in front of everyone now. And so very vulnerable because you wanted to so much. Kiss him. You always did these days, yearned to. That desire scared you, was mortifying in more ways than you could describe, particularly in this moment because what if they could all sense it? What if Jungkook realised it all of a sudden? That you really wanted this? That your entire heart ached for him?Â
And as if you had the fear written all over your face, Jungkook reached for you, tugging on your elbow and turning you back to him. He gave you a smile, his head tilted to the side. A few strands slipped out of his perfectly messy hair, and a soft shadow covered half his face. Right then, he seemed all so delicate to you, so good, so precious. It was instant, your heartbeat dwindled into something calmer and wilder at the same time. Somehow, it seemed almost easy and much more difficult to kiss him and pretend it didnât dig daggers into your heart. None of it made sense, the effect he had on you, but you supposed a lot of things hadnât made sense in your life since Jungkookâs first appearance.
âItâs just a kiss, cabbage,â he mumbled, shrugging.Â
It was. It was just a kiss, to your friends, to him. It was nothing, a small price you had to pay to entertain your friends. It was fun and simple. It was just unfortunate that it was so much more to you.Â
You held your breath when Jungkook placed a hand on your cheek, thumb brushing over your cheekbone, gentle and soothing. He was doing everything right, and yet, you could have thrown up right then and there. Jimin gasped and squeaked as Jungkook inched closer to you, Jisoo grasping onto his arm because oh my God, they were going to kiss! All while you were desperately, almost frantically, fisting Jungkookâs shirt, as if you would float away otherwise and it was the only thing keeping you on the ground.
And Jungkook kissed you all too delicately.
To the point, you could have believed him. That you meant something to him, that he might just be in love with you. It was horrible, to be kissed like that. You werenât sure if this was how it felt like, to be in love and to be loved. You hoped it wasnât.
You pulled him closer to you, deepened the kiss, allowed him in. For just a while, you told yourself. Just until you found the strength in you to resist him, until you deemed your own well-being more important than these fleeting highs with Jungkook.
âAlright, dinnerâs- oh.âÂ
Chaeyoung stopped right before she could bump into you, and you quickly pulled away. But Jungkook kept holding you, not letting go of you. Chaeyoung placed her hands on her hips and shot Jimin and Jisoo a long look.
âAh, who of you idiots did this?âÂ
âWhy do you assume it was-â
âSo it was you,â Chaeyoung said, interrupting Jimin and shaking her head. âTake it off. Dinnerâs ready.â
Jisoo slapped his shoulder, laughing, clearly enjoying seeing him getting reprimanded by Chaeyoung. Jimin rolled his eyes, mumbling something about how Chaeyoung was no fun but he followed her orders, getting up and reaching for the bundle above your heads. You backed away-actually you jumped. It made Jimin pause and narrow his eyes, his mouth lifting into a smile when he saw the opportunity.
âOh, what if I hold it over you-â
âNo, donât even!â you hissed, pushing Jimin away from you and seeking refuge behind Chaeyoung.Â
âOh, itâs just one more kiss, Y/N!â Jimin taunted, following you. You shrieked, moving further from him, irritated by the constant laughter spilling from his throat. He was enjoying this too much. Too much!
âFuck off!â
âDonât be like-â
âIâm serious, stop!â
âItâs fun-â
âOkay, no, enough,â Jungkook said, stepping in and swiftly taking the mistletoe from Jimin. He slapped him with it lightly, eliciting a gasp from Jimin. âNo more chasing my girlfriend with mistletoe, okay? Or you can do your physics assignments on your own.âÂ
Rubbing his cheek, almost convinced he was allergic to mistletoe now, Jimin gasped as if Jungkook had just declared an end to their friendship. âKook! How could you say that?â
âStop chasing my girlfriend then.â
âOh my God, fine, I wonât,â Jimin groaned, pouting. âYouâre so lame.â
When he reached for the mistletoe, Jungkook hesitated, looking over to you and even though you preferred him not to hold it in his hands again, you knew Jimin would get even more offended if Jungkook withheld the bundle from him. So you gave him a nod.Â
âOkay, alright, dinnerâs getting cold,â Chaeyoung said, clapping her hands together when Jimin was back in possession of his mistletoe. âSo how about we take this party into the kitchen, yeah?â
Like you had said he would, Jungkook got an earful from Chaeyoung when she noticed the expensive bottle of wine suddenly appear on the dinner table because how dare you bring something when I clearly said not to? And on top of that such an expensive bottle too. Do you shit money? Somebody needs to teach you how to manage your finances. Rather than come to his help, you left Jungkook to fend for himself which earned you puppy eyes from him, but hadnât you told him better? Surprisingly however he managed to convince her to open the bottle anyway. You were sure sheâd get him to return it, or at least take it home again. Jungkook could be very compelling. But you knew that already.Â
âIf the teaching thing doesnât work outââ Namjoon had his mouth stuffed as he spoke, and you caught Yoongi cringing next to him. ââI think you should become a cook, Chae.â
She smiled sheepishly, waving him off. âOh, please. My momâs cooking is so much better.â
âI donât know if I believe you,â he laughed. âThis is seriously so good.â
Hoseok shoved a big bite into his mouth, a drop of sauce splashing onto the table. Chaeyoung smiled and wiped it off for him. He thanked her.
âItâs the best food on Earth. Iâd die for it,â Jimin sighed, a little too loud and dramatic, his mouth full with food, giving you all a glimpse into what his stomach must look like. His cheeks were tinted a slight pink, the red wine slowly flushing him through. âLike that one Gordon Ramsey meme? Where you knowââ He sat up, changing his voice in a failed attempt to mimic the British celebrity chef. ââheâs like âFinally some good fucking food.â or whatever. Thatâs how I always feel when I eat Chae.â
For a second, there was silence. Jungkook and you looked at each other with big eyes, a hint of a smile on your lips because it was obvious that Jimin hadnât realised what he had said, blabbering on and on without a second thought.
âMaybe you should calm it on the alcohol,â Seokjin mumbled, pushing Jiminâs glass away from him. But it had the opposite effect, making him reach for it instead and down the entire contents of his glass in one quick go.
âNever!â
âYou mean⊠her food. When you eat her food, you could cry, right?â Taehyung clarified, and Jimin looked at him with big eyes.
âOh, yes of course! What else would I mean?â he laughed, loud and boisterous. âChaeâs all yours, Seok. Donât worry. Iâm not your competition.âÂ
Chaeyoung almost choked on the wine, and Hoseok turned a few shades redder.Â
âSomeone get this idiot some water,â Yoongi snorted, and Namjoon already got up.
You turned your gaze to Jisoo when she leaned into you, taking the chaos as a chance to just talk to you, her hand grabbing yours.
âHowâs the scarf going by the way? Are your loops now clean?â she whispered, careful to keep her voice low. You glanced towards Jungkook, but he was busy trying to convince Jimin to drink a few sips from the water at least. And though he hadnât heard a word, you glared at Jisoo, shaking your head.
âNot with him around,â you hissed, and she rolled her eyes.
âOh, look at him. Heâs not paying us attention. I wanna know. Iâm invested now, especially because you always called me a grandma for knitting. Howâs it going?â she asked, and you knew it was best to just quickly answer her because she wasnât dropping this.
âYeah, yeah, I got it now. Itâs almost done-â
âWhat are you guys whispering about?â Jennie asked, leaning in, eyes wandering between Jisoo and you.
âY/Nâs knitting a scarf for her boyfriend for Christmas.â
âJi!âÂ
Your features couldnât decide whether or not to contort in embarrassment or fear Jungkook had overheard this time. Itâd ruin your surprise. You were in luck though because he wasnât paying your conversation any mind.
âOh, thatâs cute!â Jennie squealed. âI only thought Ji knits. I didnât know you knit too, Y/N.â
âI-â
âShe doesnât. She just sews a little,â Jisoo said, beating you to it. She leaned towards Jennie as if she was telling her a secret and didnât want you to hear, but she deliberately kept eye contact with you and didnât even lower her voice, her lips curling up. âShe learned how to knit for her stupid little boyfriend. She asked me so many questions and bought so much yarn too. It was so annoying-â
You kicked Jisoo in the shin, shutting her up. She sharply sucked in her breath, hands flying to her leg, mouth agape in a silent screech.
âYouâre talking too much,â you hissed, not remorseful at all even as she rubbed her shin. Jennie laughed.Â
âThatâs really cute of you though, Y/N,â she said, smiling at you. âI like the idea. Heâs gonna love it.â
âItâs just a scarf,â Jisoo mumbled, rolling her eyes, words dipping into an astonishing amount of immaturity. âItâs not that cute. I could knit you a better scarf-â
âStop bragging. Itâs different. Youâve always knit. Y/N made an effort to learn how to for Kook.â
âIâd learn how to do something new for you.â
âSo do.â
âWhat? Like I wonât?â
You took that as your cue to exit the conversation, glancing over to Jungkook instead. He hadnât noticed your conversation at all. In fact, he was stuffing his mouth full. Some extra sauce decorated the corner of his mouth in his haste. Without missing a beat, you wiped it off with your thumb before cleaning it on his napkin. He turned to you, eyes as big as a reindeer caught in headlights. It hit you only then as he stared at you and you stared at him, what you had done. How intimate the nature of the gesture had been. You might as well have ripped out your heart and told him to keep it. It would have been the same.
âDid⊠you just-â
âOh, the wine is actually so good!â Jisoo sighed, putting down her glass, and right now you were very glad she sat next to you. âI think thatâs the best wine Iâve ever had.â
Jungkookâs eyes darted between her and you. He was thinking, contemplating if heâd engage with Jisoo in a conversation, or tease you until you were just about ready to be swallowed by a hole. Maybe it was the way you wouldnât even look in his direction and kept your gaze trained on Jisoo, or maybe because he was planning on bringing it up another time, but in the end, he decided to spare you.
âIâm happy to hear you like it,â he grinned before jabbing you in the side. You flinched, grabbing his hand before he could do it again. âSee, and you said they wouldnât taste the difference.â
âShe doesnât,â you grumbled, brows creased together.
âSheâs just saying that because she knows how expensive it is,â Taehyung said, and for once you agreed. Jisoo rolled her eyes at him, mumbling something about not wanting to argue with an idiot and picking a piece of lint off of Jennieâs shoulder instead.
Jungkook shrugged. âWhatever. She likes it, so worth every penny.â
You were about to let go of his hand, feeling any kind of contact was a step too much, a step into a very wrong and dangerous direction. But Junkook interlaced his fingers with yours, holding it firm, thumb brushing over the back of your hand. For a second, you contemplated pulling away because this was too much, too close. You didnât, not finding the strength in you to do it.Â
âActually, I havenât learned half of my momâs cooking. She always makes this amazing pork belly stew for every Christmas. If you love this, youâll love that,â Chaeyoung said, pulling you into their conversation that seemed to have circled back to her cooking.
âAre you gonna go back home for Christmas? Because Iâll go with you if so. That stew sounds amazing,â Yoongi said.
âOh my God, if you are, please take me with you too because this is so good,â Jennie sighed dreamily, making Chaeyoung laugh.Â
âExcuse me, what about our Christmas plans?â Jisoo gasped with faux upset, and immediately Hoseok, Chaeyoung, Jimin and you exchanged glances.Â
Moving fast, Hoseok mouthed and you nodded. You had no idea. At the same time, it seemed to work for them.
âOh, canât we just drop by for dinner really quickly for some food?â Jennie tried, pursing her lips into a pout, but Jisoo just clicked her tongue and shook her head.
âGood food is all it takes, huh?â
Jennie laughed.
âIs everyone going home for Christmas?â Namjoon asked, wiping his mouth before grabbing his glass of wine, holding it up to his lips, speaking into it. âI know Kook is for sure.â
Jungkook nodded. âGot me there.â
And even without looking at him, you knew he was smiling and more than excited to go back home. He squeezed your hand, and you could tell he did so unconsciously. You squeezed back, happy for him that he was happy.
âOh, right, Iâve been meaning to ask!â Jimin gasped, turning rather dramatically towards you. You blinked, unsure of what was about to spill from his lips.
âIs it true that youâre going back home with Kook, Y/N?âÂ
What?
Everyone turned to you, Chaeyoung raising her brow at you because were you? You stared back at her, mouth opened and closing because no, right? You werenât, or were you? Your eyes lifted to Jungkook, and he had that same look on his face. Neither of you knew what to say or do. This wasnât something you had discussed. And why would you have? Itâd be ridiculous to assume that youâd be going back home with Jungkook to meet his parents for Christmas.
âUh-?â
âIâm just asking because Kookâs parents have been asking me if I knew if heâs actually gonna bring you,â Jimin continued, shrugging. And maybe you would have focused on how much you wanted to strangle him right now and needed him to shut up if your mind wasnât reeling from the fact that Jungkook seemed to have not only told his parents about your existence but also that you would be spending Christmas with them.
What?
âOkay, yeah, no, wait,â Jungkook interjected, a clear panic in his voice, turning fully to you. âI can explain.â
You blankly stared at him, unable to even make a single sound. He dug a hand through his hair, looking even more panicked the longer you said nothing.
âSo, uh, my brother saw my posts and stories online and might have told my parents⊠that Iâm dating you. And so theyâve been really curious and asking about you a lot, and it was a little annoying, so I just told them that I might bring you around for Christmas to shut them up. Butââ He held out his hand as if to get ahead of you saying anything. ââI didnât promise them anything. I just said it to get them off my back, you know?â
You continued staring at him, unsure of how to react or what to say because well, you hadnât thought that either of your parents were ever going to get involved in any shape or form. You hadnât even played with the idea of telling your parents. And why would you? All of this was fake! A ruse, so Jungkook could win his stupid bet!
âIt wasnât planned, or anything, okay? I wasnât going to tell them about you-â
âYou werenât?â Jimin blurted out, brows pinching together. He seemed to have lost all ability to read the room, just a glass or two of wine enough to dull his brain. âOw-!â
He glared at Taehyung, rubbing his arm. It still wasnât enough to shut him up however.Â
âWhat was that for? Iâm just saying Iâm a little surprised that Jungkook, the definition of a mamaâs and papaâs boy, was planning on keeping his girlfriend a secret when he hasnât shut up about Y/N for months-â
âNo, wait itâs not like that,â Jungkook quickly scrambled, gesturing wildly. âItâs just that my parents, you know, can get a little much. And, I donât know-â
His sentence didnât find an end, and Jimin seemed to just take that as a sign to go on,Â
âDidnât Narae meet-â
âOkay, how about you finish your food, huh?â Taehyung interrupted, taking Jiminâs fork and picking up a big piece of meat before shoving it into his mouth. Namjoon and Seokjin exchanged glances, cringing. Yoongi lowered his head, and Jennie slid down on her seat. Chaeyoung looked at you with big empathetic eyes and Jisoo even gave your hand a squeeze.Â
If there was anything genuine between you, this would have been devastating. Luckily, there wasnât. So it couldnât hurt. And yet, your heart felt like it was bleeding in your chest, a dagger shoved in, a dagger with Jungkookâs name. He was staring holes into you, but you couldnât look at him, settling on the edge of the table instead. You werenât hurt. You werenât hurt that Narae with her perfect smile and manicured nails and beautiful hair and glossy lips got to meet his parents and you didnât. It didnât bother you at all! That was what you told yourself at least. Because you couldnât possibly be hurt. Not when your relationship was transactional and just an act. And yet, to your misery, you were hurt, deeply. You hated it, how you werenât all that unbothered as you wanted and more importantly, should be.Â
You were pulled out of your thoughts though when you saw the glare Hoseok was looking at Jungkook with. It dawned on you how awful all of it had to sound to your friends then. Narae, who never even was Jungkookâs official girlfriend, got to meet his parents, but you, who was officially (at least to them) his girlfriend, he not only didnât want to introduce to them but also planned on keeping a secret?
âOh my God, you guys!â you laughed, loud and light, like it was all so very dumb and stupid. With a big swoop, you grabbed Jungkookâs hand on the table, hoping no one saw the shake in your fingers. Everyone looked at you.
âYouâre misunderstanding. We had agreed from the beginning that we should take it a little slower, and not tell everyone immediately. I knew he wasnât going to tell his parents. I told him not to.â You put on your most convincing smile, swallowing the knot in your throat, hoping desperately it was enough. Everyone was looking at you, and you looked right back at them, at everyone except for Jungkook. Your vision almost blurred, hazy at the edges, feeling your composure threaten to slip.
âItâs nothing.â
There was a slight shake in your voice, the tiniest of a waver. You couldnât tell if your friends noticed, their faces unreadable to you. A moment of silence stretched across the room, the food long forgotten about. In the end, it was slightly tipsy Jimin, the one who started it all, to break the awkwardness.
âOkay, well, do I text them⊠yes or-?â
You wondered if Jimin was this stupid, or trying to put you through hell on purpose. His question made Taehyung next to him sigh and shake his head, lips pressed together as he stared daggers into the older one.
âWhat?â Jimin whispered, offended. Maybe you should have taken the wine from him sooner.Â
You looked at Jungkook finally. He didnât seem to have an answer at all, his eyes big and wide like a childâs. There was something in them that you couldnât quite pinpoint. It almost seemed like he wanted you to agree, say yes, of course, youâd meet his parents. You had to be imagining it. As quickly as it had come, you squashed the thought.
It was up to you. The decision was in your hands. Everyone was waiting for your answer. Jungkook would have to go with whatever you were saying, whether or not he liked it.Â
A lot of it was probably spite, spite that Narae met them already and you hadnât. And how would it look if you werenât there when Jungkook inevitably made a post about being back home with his family and you werenât there in the pictures? What would Narae think? You could already see a backhanded Instagram story in front of your eyes, how there was trouble in paradise. It was something you wouldnât put past her at all, seeing as she had done so before, posting just an hour after Jungkook celebrated your one month anniversary about how cringe some couples could be. Anyone doubting your relationship might just lead to Taehyung doubting your relationship and then to Jungkook losing his bet and all of this would have been for nothing. That couldnât happen, right? You had to do something against it!
âThey probably wonât stop bothering you until you tell them yes, right?âÂ
You tried your hardest to sound casual, nonchalant, chill as some might say. This was no big deal, you told yourself.
It wasnât what Jungkook had expected. He thought youâd give some roundabout answer that in the end summarised that you needed to keep things slow and easy. But you agreed. You were going to meet his parents. He searched for something in your features, anything to tell him how you genuinely felt about it. He was trying to read you, but it was like he had the wrong dictionary.Â
âIf thatâs alright with you-â Maybe it was to hit the nail on the head, finish it off, you couldnât say. But the urge was strong right then, just once to say it. ââbabe?â
You turned to him and looked at him almost confidently. It was both your face and the pet name, but Jungkook couldnât help but laugh. Of course, now you were going to call him babe. A grin spread across his lips.
âOkay, yeah.â He held your hand firmer and tighter. âIâd be more than happy for you to meet my parents. Theyâd be thrilled.â
He was a great liar. It sounded oh so very genuine.
You squeezed his hand and turned to Jimin. âI guess you can text them Iâm going.â
âI think that was it,â Jungkook said, handing you the last few dirty plates.Â
âAlright,â you hummed, moving around some of the dishes to make some more space in the dishwasher.Â
âOh,â Chaeyoung exclaimed in surprise upon seeing Jungkook standing there with you, âyou can head out first. Iâll help Y/N.âÂ
She wore a smile on her lips, but you knew better.Â
âItâs fine. Iâll just help-â
âNo, really, get out,â Chaeyoung interrupted, slipping just the slightest bit and you gave Jungkook a look, almost reaching out for his hand and giving it a squeeze. She was curt, too curt. It surprised him, clearly. âIâm the host. Iâll clean up. Join the others in the living room.â
You offered him a nod, and with that Jungkook slipped out, receiving a more genuine smile and a quiet thank you from Chaeyoung on the way out because she knew he was more than confused by her just now. Before he even had the chance to turn to ask whether or not he should close the door, she did herself. You knew to prepare yourself, putting the stack of dishes aside. She folded her arms in front of her stomach.
This was an interrogation.
In another world (read: in a detective TV show), thereâd be a metal table between you and youâd be handcuffed to it. A clock would decorate the blank walls, ticking away in the background, and the air would be chilly and humid, stifling almost. Chaeyoung would dramatically slide pictures across to you, and they would be incriminating ones, blurry but clearly depicting you in the middle of whatever crime you were accused of. She would point at them and tell you how you had one chance to tell her the truth.
âHow are you?â
Just the question almost made you laugh. It was heartwarming. You knew exactly what she was trying to get out of youâif it hurt you at all that Narae had met Jungkookâs parents and he had seemingly wanted to keep you a secret. You dried your hands on the kitchen towel.
âIâm fine, thanks. How are you-â
âAre you lying?â
She took this very seriously, her face not even holding a hint of a smile. Again, in another world sheâd stare you down, gaze cold and unwavering, and ask if you wanted to try again.
âDo I look like I am lying?â
You were lying about all of it, about most things concerning Jungkook and you these days. But you couldnât say that. You couldnât admit that the entire conversation during dinner hurt you to the degree it did, to a degree you would rather not admit, that it hurt at all to begin with. Because being hurt implied you had some sort of right to be, implied Jungkook owed you⊠something. And that was just not true.
Chaeyoung paused, sizing you up. It was hard to figure out what conclusion she came to, her eyes narrowed and sharp. She opened her mouth, but right then, someone announced themselves with a knock on the door. Without waiting, they poked their head in, and it could realistically only be one person.Â
âWhat did she say?â Jisoo asked.
Were you air today?
âSays sheâs fine,â Chaeyoung said, wrinkling her nose.
âYou donât believe her?â Jisoo slipped inside and slowly closed the door, making sure beforehand though that no one was in earshot. Chaeyoung scrutinised you for another moment before coming to her conclusion with a long sigh.
âNo, I do.â She paused before looking at you. âYou know Iâd- weâd rip him into pieces for you, right?â
You had no doubt for a second they would. Actually, all of your friends would, but Chaeyoung and Jisoo would be the first ones to throw a punch.
âI do, and I love you guys for it,â you say, smiling genuinely because God, you did love your friends so much. âBut you donât have to because Iâm fine. And like I said, we had talked about it. You know how I am. Parents arenât my thing.â
âWell, for that you just agreed to go meet them,â Jisoo mumbled, scrunching her nose, and you swallowed. Maybe it was hearing it from someone else, or maybe it was because you were no longer sitting around the dinner table with everyone expectedly staring at you and awaiting for an explanation, but it finally hit you. What exactly you had agreed to. Once your mind wasnât clouded with the thought of Narae, you realised that oh my God, you were meeting Jungkookâs parents.
It was funny how quickly things could change. How just a few minutes ago, you didnât worry about it at all, only thinking of Narae and her stupid perfect grin and the fact she had met them, and now you were worried because what would they say about you? Would they like you? What if they were like Jaehwaâs parents and-
âNow, donât make that face,â Chaeyoung interrupted, putting a hand on your shoulder, noticing your spiral. âTheyâre gonna like you.â
âYeah, you donât have anything to worry about at all, Y/N,â Jisoo reassured. âIf anything, they should be on their best behaviour. Because if notâŠâ
And like the amazing friend she was, Jisoo started punching the air, showing you her swift moves that she would put on Jungkookâs parents.Â
âCanât you see? They say one wrong thing, and itâd be over for them. Ji would do these weird punches and knock them right out,â Chaeyoung said. âItâs gonna be fine. Has to.â
âAlso, with the way Jungkook acts with you, letâs be honest heâs head over heels for you,â Jisoo argued, putting an arm around you. âI can see him standing up for you.â
âYeah, I hate to give a man any credit, but he would.â
âAnd again, if he doesnâtâŠâ Jisoo didnât finish her sentence, instead showing you her oh so brilliant and not wobbly but actually super fatal kick.
They both turned to you, and you slowly nodded. Maybe they were right. You didnât necessarily think Jungkook would stand up for you, not because you didnât believe he would but because you didnât even let yourself go there. If you did, if you assumed he would do something like that for you, youâd be having expectations for him and you had no right to. But you knew that Chaeyoung and Jisoo would be there for you, and it was a comforting thought. That was enough. Your friends were enough. And maybe, you just liked to believe them tooâthat it would all somehow turn out just fine.
âYeah, I guess,â you mumbled.
âItâs gonna be fine!â Chaeyoung repeated, squeezing your shoulder.
Before you could dwell on it any further, a knock on the kitchen door interrupted you.Â
âYeah?â Jisoo said, and a moment later, Hoseok stuck his head in, offering an apologetic smile because he obviously knew what was going on in here.
âSorry to interrupt, but Jimin asked for you, Chae,â he said, sounding unsure. He clearly hadnât gotten a reason as to why he was supposed to call for Chaeyoung. She frowned and seemed less than willing to go, but you saw this as a great opportunity to put an end to this conversation and move on. Ignoring the fact you were going to meet Jungkookâs parents wasnât going to solve the issue, but right now your brain felt mushy and drained. Too much of todayâs focus had been on you, you couldnât do it any longer.
âLetâs just all go,â you said. âWeâve been here for too long anyway.â
Jisoo agreed, mumbling something about how she couldnât leave Jennie alone with all of the guys outside any longer, not in good conscience at least. She helped you put the last few plates into the dishwasher, and hooked her arm with yours as you made your way back into the living room, her head resting on your shoulder.
âDid he say what he wanted?â Chaeyoung asked Hoseok, the two walking behind you.Â
âProbably something stupid.â
And indeed it was.
Because the moment Jisoo and you had made it past the doorstep, Jimin jumped up and pointed at Chaeyoung and Hoseok. The two froze, all eyes on them, and when you turned to look, you found them in the same fate as Jungkook and you had been in earlier.
âOh, Jimin,â you chuckled, shaking your head. He beamed with pride, chest out and a grin bigger than his entire face.Â
âWe arenât-â Chaeyoung couldnât even finish her sentence, sputtering for words. âNo! This is⊠stupid!â
âYou have to. Otherwise, itâs bad luck,â Jungkook grinned. âThatâs what you said, right, Seok?â
Hoseok looked positively ready to strangle him, but you couldnât have been prouder of him right now. Even though Jimin was the one to orchestrate this, it felt like sweet revenge to get back at Hoseok. And really, you were helping him and Chaeyoung. Maybe today was the day finally something would happen.
âSeok and I arenât- we arenât-â
âItâs just a kiss!â Seokjin said, and you nodded. Because as much as you felt for them, having been in their position, you knew Chaeyoung wouldnât have come to your rescue. She might have disapproved, but she would have definitely enjoyed the show and let it go on until you kissed.
âJust do a quick peck,â Taehyung suggested, pressing a kiss to Yoongiâs cheek to demonstrate. The older one wiped his cheek and shook his head, but there was clear amusement tugging on the corners of his mouth too. You laughed at the absurdity of it all, especially when you caught the embarrassed looks on Chaeyoungâs and Hoseokâs faces.
âAlso if you hadnât walked in together like I had predicted you obviously would, you wouldnât be in this situation,â Jimin said, and Hoseok let out a noise that could only be described as a weak and mangled attempt at faux upset. âYou guys are so clearly in love with each other anyway, just kiss!â
âOh my God,â Chaeyoung let out a scoff, but it sounded pitchy and panicked, âseriously? H-how many times do we have to tell you guys that we are just really good friends? Just like Jimin and Y/N!â
âDonât be ridiculous here, Chae,â you laughed. âJimin and I are just friends, but you two? Oh, please.â
âThere was an attempt, huh?â
Chaeyoung glared at Jisoo, her cheeks gaining a deeper shade of red with every passing second. In a last ditch attempt, she turned to Hoseok, hoping for some backup from him.
âTell them-â
This time when her sentence got lodged in her throat, it was for a very different reason. Because Hoseok was looking at her like he was ready to risk it all in front of everybody. Like he was ready to just say it, do something. And Chaeyoung knew, freezing to a statue.
Jisoo and you looked at each other, gasping. Her nails dug into your arm and you held onto her just as strongly. Your breath hitched in your throat as Hoseok placed a hand on Chaeyoungâs cheek, pausing and hesitating for a moment, as if he waited for her to reject him before ultimately kissing her. And instantly, she pulled him closer.
It was like a scene out of every 2000s romantic comedy, the finale of the third act, what you had all been waiting up to. It was a scene to swoon and die for.Â
A sense of joy you had rarely felt overtook you, a rush. You began shaking Jisoo, mouth split into a grin. As much as you had wanted and actually still wanted to strangle Jimin tonight for bringing that stupid mistletoe, you were just about ready to kiss him (platonically and only figuratively of course).
âSee!â Jimin laughed, pointing at Hoseok and Chaeyoung, both of them flushed red to the tips of their ears. But they were smiling too. This had been good.
âI canât believe that this is how you guys get together,â Jisoo laughed, Chaeyoung and Hoseok looking at each other, his arm wrapped around her middle. They laughed, shrugging.
Jimin proudly pointed at himself, beaming brighter than a Christmas tree. âAll my doing.â
âShut up,â Yoongi laughed, trying and failing to kick him in the knee. And though his attempt wasnât successful, it earned him a thank you! from Chaeyoung. Jimin looked over to Namjoon for some kind of help, but he simply shrugged. He scoffed when he saw Seokjin squeeze Yoongiâs shoulder, mumbling something about how he was just jealous.
âI mean⊠neither did I,â Hoseok chuckled, seeming still completely out of it, unbelieving.
âThought about it a lot, huh?â Taehyung asked, grinning, and for a moment, you could see Hoseok struggling to answer, decide whether or not he wanted to admit the blatant truth, confess that heâd been imagining this more times than he should have. In the end, he cared less about saving face and looking cool, and much more about who he had his arm wrapped around, finally.
âYeah, always.â
And just like that, Chaeyoung pulled him down for another kiss. The sight warmed Jisooâs heart because she turned to Jennie, reaching out for her. With a slight tug, she was at Jennieâs side. You laughed, shaking your head, just to catch Jungkook looking at you. For a moment, you didnât quite know what to do even though you werenât the one caught staring. The same couldnât be said about Jungkook. He didnât seem to care at all, eyes not holding an ounce of uncertainty. It was obvious that he was much more confident and comfortable with being seen by you. Something you still werenât at this point, not entirely at least, not right in this very moment, or⊠actually ever.
Jungkook didnât say anything as he stretched his hand out. You hesitated, if just for a second. Because maybe you shouldnât. Not when your heart was beating the way it was. And yet, you did take it, did let him pull you close and hold you and press his lips to the top of your head.
âYou donât have to meet them if you donât want to.â
He whispered it, spoke in a soft and warm voice. His words floated to your ears, and you knew. You didnât have to do anything ever actually. Not for him at least. He expected nothing from you. You closed your eyes, and listened to his heartbeat in his chest. Strong and firm. It was the opposite of yours. Yours was a mess, thumping and skipping beats.Â
âI will.â
Jungkook smiled as bright as the sun, pressing another kiss to your head. You could feel the excitement rushing through his fingertips, his arm tightening around you. You didnât know the reason for it, his excitement. It didnât make sense why he would be, you werenât his girlfriend after all. You refused to think about it, preferring the bliss of ignorance.
God, you loved him so much. You did. You loved Jungkook to an indescribable amount. And God, was it time to stop all of this.
The video had been playing for less than twenty seconds when the call came in, your phone lighting up beside you. You paused your laptop, his name taking up your entire phone screen. And though Jungkook and you had begun calling each other more frequently now, spending at least once a week on the phone together, you were confused when you glanced at the time. But you accepted the call, sliding your thumb over the glass. Some ruffling met your ears before finally, he came through.
âHi.â
For some reason, there was a smile on your lips.
âWhat do you want?â you laughed, glancing at the time in the upper left corner of your phone. 01:24. âItâs late. Why arenât you sleeping?â
âCould say the same about you,â Jungkook argued, and you rolled your eyes, scoffing slightly, already sensing where this was going. You leaned back into your couch, looking at the ceiling with renewed interest.
âIâm not tired.â
âNeither am I.â
âI donât believe you.â
âThen neither do I.â
âWell, you had a full day of classes today, so you must be at least a little tired,â you shot back, and a beat of silence passed. For a moment, it seemed like you came out victorious.Â
âYou know my schedule?â
The question hung in front of you, and you were glad that this was just a call. Because you could see it, his stupid face. The proud smile on his lips, the grin that adorned it. He would inch closer to you, push you to answer, and you would cave and crumble terribly.Â
â... no.â
And Jungkook began laughing almost immediately, his voice booming through your phone. You cringed, biting your tongue.Â
âIâm going to hang up.â
âNo, no, no, donât,â he said, still laughing however. âIâm sorry.â
His apology didnât sound an ounce sincere, but you were never going to actually hang up. A comfortable silence passed, and you could have stayed on the phone forever.
âOh, have you watched the newest video I sent you yet?â
âYou mean the two hour long video essay about the phenomenal music scoring of Avatar?â you hummed, glancing over to your laptop to see the screen dark already. âYeah, I was about to watch it when you called.â
Somehow, you could hear his smile forming on his lips. âYou should watch it.â
âYeah, I will,â you said, sighing and rolling your eyes.
There was silence for another few seconds.Â
âWhat are you doing?â Jungkook asked, and you could tell he was genuinely curious. You blinked, having completely forgotten what you had been up to until he called. You looked at the ball of yarn sitting in your lap, your attempt at a scarf hanging between the two knitting needles. But you couldnât tell him, it would ruin the surprise.Â
And so, you returned the question instead. âWhat are you doing?â
âI asked you first.â
âI asked you second.â
Jungkook sighed. âYouâre very fun to talk to sometimes, you know?â
You laughed, not missing the irony in his voice. âThanks. You are too.â
âJust tell me,â he said, and you frowned at his poor attempt to get you to talk.Â
âWhy donât you tell me first?â
He let out a small scoff, and you could picture his face perfectly. The way his tongue would be digging into his cheek and his eyes rolling back because God, you were frustrating sometimes! But there would be an undeniable smile on his lips. There always was.Â
âAlright,â Jungkook said, and you raised your brows. âIâm outside.â
You frowned. âWhere are you going? At this hour?â
âWhy donât you guess?âÂ
âJust tell me.â
He paused, hesitated. Somehow, you could hear his grin turn bigger.
âHow about you look outside and see for yourself instead?â
Your heart sank in your chest, something strange taking hold of you. You moved without a thought, almost knocking over one of your pothos sitting on your window sill when you pulled the curtain aside. The glass was cool to touch, but you pressed your entire hand against it, just to feel something steady. Because right now, you felt the opposite of it, heart jumping to your throat and beating there like it was bound to fall out. Because there was no way that he was here right now! This wasnât a cheesy romcom! But you also knew that he wouldnât lie to you.
And he didnât.Â
There he was, standing on the sidewalk, in front of your building, phone pressed to his ear, head in his neck, mouth in a grin and waving up to you.Â
You opened and closed your mouth several times, scoffing in the end and shaking your head.
âYouâre so⊠stupid, Jeon.â
Jungkook laughed, âWell, thatâs been established before.â
âYouâre such a ridiculous stupid little man, Jeon!â you went on, pressing a hand to your forehead and squeezing your eyes closed for a moment. âWhat are you doing here?â
âOh, is it a crime now to drop by your girlfriendâs home when you miss her?â
The words rolled off his tongue with a certain confidence and ease. Two things you rarely ever had, even less around Jungkook. It always seemed so very fragile and dangerous, to be so open and vulnerable. You couldnât snap back, tell him how ridiculous he was because you had just seen each other two days ago at the Christmas party. Hell, you had been spending almost every day with each otherâeither on the phone or in person driving to Seoâs bakery to pick up your needed batch of cookies or watching Avatar until you both could recite every line. And yet here he was, telling you that he missed you, so much so that he needed to see you in the middle of the night, at 1:42.
Right then, it became blatantly obvious to youâthat Jungkook and you had crudely blown the lines you had established beforehand, agreed to contractually, into absolute smithereens, that you two had made new ones, dangerous ones, ones that resembled an actual relationship, and that, even worse, you had not only never talked about it but gotten used to the new rules, comfortable.
And even with that realisation lingering in your mind with big glaring bright red flags hissed high above and every possible alarm blaring in the air, you couldnât bring yourself to tell Jungkook that this was wrong, that he should go home. You should, it would spare your sanity. But your heart had only grown bigger and fonder of him. And it was horrible because you knew even more time with him, alone, in your own four walls, was the worst thing you could do. There would be nowhere for you to go, run off to. But you couldnât send him home. Because really, you didnât want to. Because it did excite you. That he was here. That he had gotten up, changed, and made his way to you. That the cold hadnât even been enough to stop him.
âNow, open up. Itâs freezing. My hands and feet are already blue,â he told you, adding a dramatic shiver to his words.
You paused, frowned, searched and didnât see it anywhere. It clicked with you. You hadnât heard the engine or turn signal during the entirety of your call.Â
âDid you- did you walk here? Why didnât you take your car?â
âFelt like it.â
âYouâre so stupid, oh my God,â you groaned, rolling your eyes as you repeatedly pressed the buzzer to open the front door for him. âNever ever do that again. Itâs freezing outside!â
Jungkook responded with a laugh. It echoed on the walls of your empty lobby, reverberating through the phone. âAlright, I wonât. I promise.â
âAlso, shouldnât you be writing that stupid paper about Newton or Einstein or whatever?â
âItâs not about either of them, but I still have a bit of time until the deadline,â he explained, and you heard him walk up the stairs. âThanks for remembering though.â
You pressed your lips together. âWhat if I was sleeping?â
âBut you arenât.â He sounded so incredibly smug and proud. You could have punched him. âAlso, I know you, cabbage. Youâd rather die than go to bed at a reasonable time.â
And somehow, that admission embarrassed you. It did. Terribly. Because he did, he did know you oh so well.Â
You left the front door ajar for him, waiting there with your hands folded in front of you, fingers picking on each other, as you listened to his steps grow closer and louder. His hand was the first thing you saw, reaching and touching the doorknob, and then it was suddenly just all of him. In front of you. He smiled at your sight, and you knew you looked more embarrassed and unsure than ever before. You were relieved you still hadnât changed the lightbulb that had burned through all those months ago, allowing the dark to obscure you from him, a soft shadow across your face.Â
Jungkook shrugged off his coat, hanging it on the hook behind the front door and revealing his maroon knit sweater and black pants to you. When he looked at you again, his gaze softened.
âHi, cabbage.â His cheeks and nose were brutally red from the wind, but he seemed as happy as ever. âI made you something.â
You noticed the metal lunchbox in his hands only when he pushed it towards you, and when you took it, it was still warm. Like whatever he had prepared, he had packed up the minute it was done and came straight to you.Â
âWhat did you make?â you asked, and you knew he wouldnât tell you, waiting for you to open the lunchbox instead and discover for yourself. You peeled open the lid just a little, revealing a small corner when the smell hit you. Your eyes shot to Jungkook, and he looked both sheepish and proud.Â
âYou didnât.â
A gasp, your features melting. He wrinkled his nose, turned his head to the side.
âI was gonna go get some from Seoâs Bakery, but they- did you know theyâre on Christmas break?â
You nodded, eyes unable to take off of him, blabbering, âYeah, of course. They always are. Every Christmas. Have always been.â
Jungkook made a gesture towards you, shrugging. âWell, so I thought- I donât know. Iâd make you some instead. You gotta fuel your addiction somehow, right?â
There was no denying how many sweet gestures Jungkook had made ever since youâd been doing this (whatever one might classify this as). The amount of flowers and cookies heâd showered you with. The amount of smiles and laughs heâd pulled from you. The amount of love heâd shown you, even if it wasnât real.Â
You put the lunchbox aside, needing to return the gesture at least once. Leaning over your couch, you grabbed the half-finished scarf youâd made for him. You wanted to show him, reciprocate some of the affection and love. But in your haste, you forgot the ball of yarn the scarf was connected to.
âOh, fuck.â
Like a roll of paper, it unfurled, and though it would be annoying to roll it all up again, you shoved the scarf into Jungkookâs face, uncaring.
âItâs not finished- or particularly well done. But- I made that⊠for you,â you hesitated, a lump lodged in your throat. âI also just chose a random colour- if you donât like red, I could definitely change it, you know. Itâs not even done-â
He took it from your hands, silencing you. Your brows knit together as you watched him admire the intricate and detailed rows of red yarn. And then, he wrapped it around his neck even though the scarf was still attached to the ball of yarn and the knitting needles were poking into his neck.Â
âWait, no,â you laughed, already reaching to take it off. âYou donât have to wear it or anything- Like I said, itâs not even done. I still have to-â
Jungkook took hold of your hands. Your eyes met his. He smiled at you.Â
âYouâre so cute, cabbage,â he told you, his gaze so full and soft. And you melted right then and there, your face lit up like a fire. Melted even more so when Jungkook kissed you and pressed his forehead against yours. âI love it, cabbage. Thank you so much.â
âReally?â you said it softly, delicately, anxiously.
As if it was a proper way of responding, Jungkook took your hand and placed it on his chest. You could feel it then, under your palm and fingertips, through the fabric of his sweater, his heart.Â
âReally.â
And you let yourself believe him a little.
You donât know how. It was blurry to you, all of it, but somehow, his head ended up in your lap with your fingers threading through his hair and your back pressed to the side of your bed. You both shared the batch of cookies while you finished a few more rows for the scarf before ultimately calling it, putting it to the side, promising him youâd finish it as soon as possible. Instead, a bottle of supermarket wine found its way into your hands, the glasses always filled with the red liquid. Neither of you said much. And really, there simply wasnât a need to, the minutes ticking by as the night went on and on. An intimacy lay between you, an intimacy most would never know, an intimacy that could only come from the strange nature of your relationship.Â
âWhat?â you said, almost laughing, sure you had to have misheard him.
âIâm serious. I really like it here,â Jungkook repeated. âI like your home, a lot.â
Your mouth opened and closed before you shook your head and laughed. âBut why?â
To you, there wasnât much to like about your home here. If anything there was more to dislike than like. It was too cramped, too small. The furniture was old and shabby and the lights didnât even work properly. On bad days, it would get either unbearably freezing or hot in here. And on particularly bad days where your luck had run out, the water would run cold and the electricity cut out. There wasnât much to love here, except for your big bed and pothos you had on your window sill.
âI feel like I get to see another side of you,â Jungkook told you, shrugging and wrinkling his nose. âYou seem much more relaxed at home.â
You frowned. âWhere else should I be relaxed if not at home?â
He rolled his eyes at your comment, shaking his head. âNo, I just mean⊠you donât seem on guard at home.â
âIâm on guard?â
There was a pause. He looked at you for a long time, eyes wandering across your entire face.
âYeah, sometimes.â He wrinkled his forehead a little. âI think you used to be more on guard, or at least you were around me.â There was another pause, another beat, another moment of suspense. âWouldnât you say youâve opened up to me more since you let me in here for the first time?â
The question stumped you. Because did everything really change then? You couldnât say. To a certain degree, Jungkook was right. Things had drastically shifted between him and you. Before you would have never been in this positionâon the floor together, in your home, his head in your lap and your hands combing through his hair as you shared cookies and wine. But before you would have talked about it, established rules and laws and all kinds of conditions, and gone through every possibility. Now though, the two of you had gotten awfully comfortable with just simply not.
âWhy? Because I slept with you?â you quipped, knowing already even in your slightly tipsy state that it wasnât that.
âYou know thatâs not what I mean,â he said, sighing. You wrinkled your nose and looked to the ceiling for a few moments, leaning your head back.
âShould I be on guard?â
âAround me?â Jungkook said, shaking his head. âNo, never. Iâm an honest boy.â
You laughed, even more so when you looked at him and he was grinning proudly into your face, standing by his cheesy words. âYou make me want to kick you out.â
âPlease donât,â he said, offering you puppy eyes and snuggling even closer to you. âI wouldnât know what to do if you did.â
He winced when you tugged on his hair, slightly away from you. âYouâre annoying.â
Jungkook laughed, and you went back to silence for a while.
âAre you ever going to tell me what Joon and the others said to you that made you run into the bathroom the other day?â
It was probably the alcohol, all the time you had spent together, sitting there on the cold floor. Your mind wasnât the clearest anymore, and neither was his.Â
âThey just told me how whipped you are for me. How deeply and madly youâre in love with me,â you snorted, teasingly inching closer to his face with each word before pulling away.Â
He smiled a little, clearly expecting worse. âReally? They said that?â
âI know.â You took two big sips, downing more than half of what was in the glass, not wanting to lose that fuzzy feeling in your veins. âItâs funny, right?â
You snorted, knowing exactly what he was thinkingâThat was ridiculous!Â
âBut true.â
Jungkook didnât hesitate. But he said it softly. So softly in fact you looked at him to check that you hadnât made it up. When his mouth widened into a grin, you scoffed.
âOh, shut up.â
âItâs true. I do. I am.â
It sounded so very ironic to your ears. You shook your head and scoffed. âIs that what you told Narae too?â
Her mention from your lips surprised Jungkook, his eyes growing a little wider. You were equally as taken aback. But it was true. Because you did think about it sometimes if he did and said the same things to Narae. If everything you experienced with him had been experienced before, just with someone else, someone with a perfect smile and perfect parents.Â
âYou donât know me at all, Y/N,â Jungkook mumbled, and it sounded accusatory.Â
Your heart dropped in your chest. It felt like you were shot, the hurt instant. You looked away, teeth sinking into your tongue. But he wasnât off. You didnât know Jungkook very well. Why should you though? Not like he and you were anything meaningful, like you shared anything truthful. And it was so very embarrassing, so very embarrassing that you felt hurt at all.Â
Jungkook seemed to surprise himself with his words, seemed not to mean it like that because he was scrambling the very next second, lifting up from your lap and pleading for you to look his way.Â
âNo, no, no, I-I donât mean it like that,â he said, voice a little higher than usual, reaching for your hand, squeezing. Thereâs a desperation in his voice, a panic swinging with it that he might have just ruined a perfectly fine conversation.Â
âYou just seem to,â he hesitated, âhave this very weird and funny idea of me in your head. I-I never told Narae anything like that. Youâre the first one.â
You looked at him. There was a deep crease between his brows, and he went on when you wouldnât say anything.
âYouâre the only one whoâs ever made me do these weird things, you know?â He added a chuckle, but there wasnât much humour to it at all. You tried to smile for him, feeling this conversation was taking a rather serious turn. It was in dire need of some lightness.
âI make you do weird things?â you mumbled, slightly shaking your head, looking away. âI donât think Iâm capable of that.â
âDo you really think Iâd try to bake cookies for anyone else in the middle of the night? Or walk to their home at night, not knowing if theyâre even actually home because I wanted to surprise them? Or send every Avatar video essay I come across? Do you really think Iâd want to dress up with anyone else in a coupleâs costume than you?â
You couldnât find the right response then, your lips pressing together. It was difficult for you to say whether or not you believed him. Because you didnât think you did, not genuinely at least, not deep down. You never really did with Jungkook, believe him. Because you never let yourself go there, not fully. In the back of your mind, you knew that this was ending, only started because of a stupid little meaningless bet, that your relationship whichever form it had morphed to had no real genuine basis.Â
âDo you really think Iâd tell anyone else I-â
You shoved a cookie into his mouth, silencing him. Your gaze turned sideways, it was easier to speak for you then. If you looked at Jungkook, you wouldnât be able to say anything.
âAlright, I got it, Jeon. Now, eat your cookie and shut up,â you chuckled, and your words were accompanied with a lightness, a lightness you forced out of yourself and hoped was enough to quiet Jungkook. He stared at you, eyes big, before ultimately letting out a chuckle himself when he saw you smile at him. He held onto your hand, squeezing it.Â
âIf I wasnât too lazy to reach for my phone, Iâd take a picture of you right now,â he told you with his mouth stuffed, matching your tone, keeping it light and fun. It was amazing, how both of you simply moved on. He broke off a piece and held it to your mouth. You took it from his fingertips, letting him feed you. The sugar melted on your tongue. âReally thought you had learned your lesson, you know? That you were less judgemental now.â
âShut up,â you mumbled, still chewing. He laughed when you rolled your eyes.
For a few minutes, neither of you said anything. It seemed like the moment had resolved as easily as it had come up. You took a few sips from your glass, filling it back up when you emptied it, and Jungkook shared the last bite of the cookie with you, holding the piece in front of your lips and allowing you to pull it from his fingertips. And when he kept his fingers in front of your mouth, you pressed a quick kiss to them. He smiled and took your hand into his again, fingers interlacing.Â
âYouâre so weird,â you said, the corners of your eyes creasing when you smiled.Â
Jungkook returned it, opened his mouth to retort something clever and funny, but it was like the fire died in him, as if he simply couldnât let the moment from before slide as easily as you both had hoped and tried for it to. He reached for it again, pulling it back on shore. His face changed, morphed into something else. You couldnât pinpoint his exact expression, but your stomach churned. For a second, you felt this brief need to cry.
âYouââ He hesitated, afraid to ask because he knew you didnât want him to and he shouldnât but he needed to ask. ââbelieve me, right?â
And somehow that question carried the entire weight of the earth because you suffocated underneath it in an instant. There seemed to be so much. It didnât make sense, there shouldnât be any deeper meaning behind his question. After all, he and you werenât anything! And yet, he looked at you as if you were. When you wouldnât respond, looked away instead, Jungkook let out a chuckle. But it sounded empty and dry, and you knew you had hurt him.Â
âIâm sorry.â
There was a sadness to your words, and he noticed. It was the same kind of sadness he heard colouring your words when you had told him about Jaehwa and the heartbreak that had come with him. And he knew then not to take it to heart, your inability to believe him.
âIâm sorry. I want to- Itâs just-â
There was desperation, hurt, frustration. You buried your face into your hands, eyes closing. Itâs just hard sometimes! I donât really believe anyone really, you wanted to say. But you didnât. The admission felt too much, too hard to bring over your lips, too honest. You couldnât do it.Â
Jungkook didnât say anything, and you waited for him to take all of his things and go. The front door would click shut and with that, you would have ruined it, all of it, the past few months. But it didnât happen. You didnât hear his steps moving away from you, or the front door opening. Instead, Jungkook cupped your face with both of his hands, a smile on his lips when you finally looked at him.
âItâs fine.â
And you wished it felt like that to you. Fine. But you hadnât felt quite fine for a while now. Not since your heart began filling up every time you looked at him.Â
âIs it?â
His gaze softened, melted like the first layer of snow in the early morning hours. His thumb brushed over your cheekbones, and his touch was so very warm and comforting. You closed your eyes, and he pressed his lips to yours. It did feel fine right then when he kissed you. He held you firmly and strongly, he wasnât going to let go. Even if you might not believe him and had your doubts. Your hands curled around his shirt, and you were the one to pull it off of him. Because you needed that right now, something simple.Â
âAre you sure-â
You silenced him, removing your shirt. He looked at you for another second before kissing you again. You moved up from the floor to your bed. His lips pressed to every inch of your skin, slow and delicately. Your breathing flattened, soft whimpers emerging from your throat when his hands wandered, brushed the inside of your thighs. Jungkook was everywhere, holding and gripping and squeezing and kissing. It made your chest swell, and for a second, you thought you needed a second heart. Another one to hold it all in. All the feelings brewing inside you, all of your feelings for him. It was too much to bear for your one singular heart.
He held you, stayed close. He never allowed any space between him and you, never allowed you to think heâd get up and leave. And you never let him slip away from you, not tonight, caging him in. One day he would, you were certain of it, convinced. The contract was running up with each day, but right now, he was here, closer than ever.
And in the high of it all, your breaths mixed with his, the air smelling of sweat and lust, your faces flushed and bodies sticky, there were words lying between him and you. In fact, there was so much, it felt heavy. You hoped, in vain, he would let it slide, quietly.
âY/N, I-â
Jungkook stopped when you shook your head, pleading. You knew the ending of his sentence, he had told you it many times before. And right now, the thought of hearing it, hurt you more than it ever had before.Â
âI-â
But he stopped again when you closed your eyes and pressed your lips to his in response, hands cupping his face. He hesitated at first before kissing you back, hoping youâd understand either way. That he wanted this. That he wanted you. You didnât say it, but Jungkook knew not to cross that line, not right now. As if him not saying it would prevent the inevitable heartbreak youâd be going through in just a few weeks, would change anything. As if you didnât already love him more than you could comprehend. As if loving him didnât hurt you.
â thanks for reading !! if you have any thoughts, id love to hear it!
omg did you see that video of jk in his house with his gf? thatâs honestly so concerning people are literally filming him in his home??? His safe space? im honestly so disgusted
i havenât seen it but it already sounds so fucking disgusting?? god, i canât imagine what that must feel like. i havenât heard or seen anything so iâm just hoping people are not interacting with the content and are blocking and reporting!
[responding to positive feedback on writing] thank you! i had a lot of fun with this one :-) [<- guy who was absolutely tortured during the creative process]
waaaa it is the forehead smoochie anon!! đ€ iâm giggling and twirling my hair icb u remember me đ„č unless ⊠someone else is sending u forehead smoochies đ€šđ€š
but no way working a 9-5 for free??? youâre a saint, i hope the work youâre doing isnât too draining đ« and that the work youâre doing is something you genuinely enjoy!!
ofc i remember! everybodyâs welcome to send me smoochies but youâre the only one doing it :3 keep sending them in tho they warm me up đ„č
not lying when i say its pretty draining but i enjoy myself!! itâs a fulltime internship, hence my absence :( itâs my dream job so iâll definitely be fine hehe. sweet of u to check up on me, you take care too sweet anon!!
Omg the ow couple remind me of Carlos and gabi from desperate housewives
worked on this fic for too long for me to forget to mention theyâre loosely inspired off the solis couple đ i rewatched dhw like eight times atp it was common sense to me!!
miss u lira, i hope life is treating well and that youâre not overworking yourself! forehead smoochie for u *mwah* đ«
i miss being on here too :( is this the sweet anon who cheers me up with forehead smooches? đ„č sending smooches back!! iâm doing okie but started working a 9 to 5 for free again :) so am i truly ok