Empty Canvas

A place for the broken hearted trying to be positive and achieving our goals. Becoming the best versions of ourselves.

[kookieslessons]

I made this blog four years ago after going through a really hard break up. Four years later and I’ve changed a lot. Im basically turning thirty in a few days and I don’t look at relationships the way I once did. I think now I’m more realistic in my approach. That relationship taught me a lot actually. I don’t think I’ll ever find myself in such a sad place like that again. It took me about two years to fully get over that break up. And I did meet someone new in the process. I think in the end what I have to say to anyone who is going through heartbreak right now is: YOULL BE OKAY! EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY

[kookieslessons]

I’m just checking in...since I forgot about this blog. I hope everyone with broken hearts are doing okay.

[kookieslessons]

Its been a year...

when I created this blog I had zero followers now everyday I’m getting more followers. I do not know how many of you are going through a heartbreak but I just want you to know. ITS GETS SOOOOO MUCH BETTER. TRUST ME YOU WILL DEFINITELY MOVE ON FROM THIS. 

[kookieslessons]

How is everyone doing ???

[kookieslessons]

Ignorance vs Knowledge

I put off romance movies for so long because it hurt watching people fall in love when my heart was broken. But today I watched Letters to Juliet on Netflix. And I remember when I was in high school watching it, thinking I could not wait until I found a love like that. Then I grew up to realize love like that rarely rarely exists. It is hard to find genuine people who passionately love you. And I think I have to come accept that fact. Maybe I am just being pessimistic. 

[kookieslessons]

How are you guys doing?? I hope you are feeling okay. It’s going to be okay.

[kookieslessons]

Youll be okay!

I think the worse thing is when you’re feeling sad, hurt or angry. And everyone around you says oh you will be okay. But you want to be okay like right now. it is true you will be okay. You will definitely be better than you are now. do you forget what the other person did to you? nope. It does not automatically come out of your memory. But it does not have  an affect on you like it did before. It it such a journey to heal. It is not easy but it is worth it. In the end you will come out so much greater. You will discover new things bout yourself. You will enjoy being alone. Then maybe one day you wake up sad thinking aboutt that person. But the difference between then and now is that you keep moving. You don’t allow it to have a huge impact on your life. You will be okay :D. 

[kookieslessons]

I’m feeling blahhhhh

[kookieslessons]

Hey how is everyone doing ?

[kookieslessons]

Today’s just one of those days....I’m thinking about him. Like how did I allow someone into my life who treated me this way smh. I loved someone who didn’t give a fuck about me. It’s times like this I can’t be hard on myself. I experienced it and I’m stronger than I was. Knowing that I won’t allow this kind of behaviour into my life anymore.

[kookieslessons]

Honestly, I’m so happpy with myself (toobadwegoingthroughthistimerightnowinlife) but I’m happy being alone. I got used to it. But it doesn’t mean I don’t think about him. I still do but not in the I love him kind of way. I guess that’s also part of the process.

[kookieslessons]

I’m honestly feeling better....I still think about what happened but I’m nowhere near where I was last year. And that’s what you need to look at. Be proud that you’re no longer at the place you were. You’re moving forward to a better time in your life.. in the midst of all this chaos that’s going on in the world. Let’s just be thankful for how far we have come. It’s hard out here.

[kookieslessons]

I feel Iike what’s going to a hurt a little is hearing oh he got married . He has a child or Something along these lines. I think just for a moment hearing those words my heart is going sink..

[kookieslessons]

My Personal Heartbreak  Playlist

So my playlist is so all over the place but hey so are break ups.. 

Let go- Frou Frou 

Imogen Heap- Hide and Seek 

Fix You-Coldplay 

Becoming One of the People- James Horner (Avatar OST) 

Maestro - Hans Zimmer 

Nothing / Six Degrees of Separation / The Man Who Can’t Be Moved/ If You Ever Come Back / No Good in Goodbye -The Script 

I Don’t Need Your Love / Broken - Isak Danielson 

Hailee Steinfeld- Wrong Direction 

I Can’t Make You Love Me- Dave Thomas 

Natalie Taylor - Start Again / Collapse / Come To This

Freya Ridings - Lost Without You 

Already Gone- Kelly Clarkson or Sleeping At Last 

Hurts Like Hell - Fleurie 

Let It All Go - Birdy 

Lizzo - Truth Hurt 

Stay - O. When 

Lewis Capaldi - One 

Do Better - Lil Donald 

Of course Selena Gomez- Lose You to Love Me / Look At Her Now 

Set Me Free - Gain 

My God is Awesome - Charles Jenkins 

Survivor -2WEI 

Tedy- Can I 

Andra Day - Rise Up 

Nicki Minaj - Grand Piano 

You’re Gonna Be Ok - Brian and Jenn Johnson 

Sadness and Sorrow - Naruto OST 

The Cinematic Orchestra - To Build A Home 

[kookieslessons]

I think the downside of this heartbreak is that I don’t trust people or I don’t get close to people. Due to the fear of being betrayed. It’s like I don’t even know the person but I put this wall that maybe they’re not trustworthy. I honestly don’t want to make new friends or get close to anyone cuz I just feel like most people aren’t genuine. I know I’ll probably have to stop thinking like that. But I’m very skeptical of peoples intentions.

[kookieslessons]

@chocopuffie I know it’s hard now but it’s going to be okay. :) just know that you are not alone. It takes time to get over. You can do it!

[kookieslessons]

the Healing Process

I am here to tell you that the healing process is so messy. So do not beat up yourself mentally for slipping. IT is okay to have days where you felt like you could have done better. But if you take a look at where you were and where you are not I am sure the difference is huge. You do not wake up and just automatically change. Change takes time also trial and error.  If one day you suddenly feel sad about your ex, it is alright. It is to recognise that you were once in love with someone who did not feel the same way. Realise that you have loved and one day you will love someone so genuinely like you that before. OR you will put all the love into yourself and your own life. I think it is important not to be to hard on ourselves. After all we are just trying to live a life of happiness. Do not be hard on yourself. IF you have fail then get right back up. And if you fall again get right back up. Even if there are tears in your eyes along the way. Cry it out! This world is a tough place and so many people are mean to  each other and in the end we have to try not to allow that hurt to turn into negative people.  Ask God for strength and guidance. Ask him to help you along the way. Because you need Him.