Endure and Survive;

Kristen “Kris” Shepard• 31• Executioner My sword is sharp, my heart is strong, my spirit is ferocious - and I am going to live. Let the swords clash. Let the fight begin.-Carew Papritz ✔ protective → dependable → strong ✘ closed off → guilt ridden → self-sacrificing

[benjamin-dewitt]

{Benjamin watches the two woman in silence, nothing the impatient quality in both their tones. This might get ugly fast, despite it being unlike Kris, he believes, to get into an argument with Tessa. However, the subject matter is interesting, something he had not been told about.} Hold up now. Thomas did what? {Mostly, he’s surprised at the revelation. He had never spent much time speaking with Thomas. And while it’s a little unnerving to think one of their own had tortured another, he believes the reason is important.} Someone mind fillin’ me in on exactly what happened while Ah was gone?

[tessa-campbell-archer]

I gave him the idea. [Tessa says flatly, looking at Kris. She doesn’t feel guilty about it, and though she’d heard that Kris had stopped it, that was all she had heard on the subject and since Jessica had taken them to the prison it hadn’t seemed like anything worthy of discussing. The goal had been met, They had found their people. She glances at Ben to explain to him, albeit the shortened version.] Jessica came back and said you all were attacked and made it sound like you were pretty much dead. Then Gideon came back and gave us the real story. He took us as far as we could and we followed the fucked up trail that was left behind, but we didn’t know where to go and Jessica did nothing but talk in fuckin’ Jesus circles. We had no idea where you were, what condition you were in. We needed to get to the prison and Jessica wasn’t giving it up. Thomas tried to get the information in a new way since being nice was getting us dick. [Tessa looks at Kris and shrugs.] He wasn’t wrong. He did the right thing, and he it may have been fucked up, but we live in a fucked up world and sometimes you need to do a bad thing for the right reasons.

[kris-shepard]

And the only reason why I didn't say anything about is well... you know... kinda had the living shit beat out of me and been out for a while and now I'm on the mend. Makes talking about things that have been going on kinda hard to do. [Kris starts.[ He didn't do much. Was probably just getting started. [Kris explains bluntly. First Tessa didn't tell her about the pregnancy and now this? Maybe Kris made the wrong choice in thinking Tessa could be apart of this. Her voice doesn't rise but it's incredibly cold and calm, probably an accurate representation of who she was becoming or already became.] But seriously Tessa? I'm sorry, but what in the hell? I understand you gotta make calls, but when Ben was gone and out, you and I were what was left this  so-called council and the whole point of the council is to make decisions together or at least talk about what we could do together.  But seems like lately you've just been wanting to deal with stuff on your own. [Kris says, her voice devoid of any sort of emotion. If the comment is cold and callous, Kris is pretty sure she doesn't care right now. Maybe she will later, but that has yet to be seen.] And yeah there's some shit that we gotta do and make the hard decisions, defend the people we're sworn to protect in this group, but if we do shit like torture? Then we're no fucking better than those demon followers. Because I'm pretty fucking sure they thought the same damn thing thinking they were dong bad things for the right reasons. 

[tessa-campbell-archer]

[Tessa straightens immediately and looks at the woman. Her mind races for a moment, trying to understand why he would need to come up in a council meeting.] What exactly do we need to talk about him for? [She asks, and though her voice is far from threatening, it’s unhappy. She doesn’t like being blindsided, and if this was the way someone wanted to tell her there was an issue with her husband, she would have preferred some kind of warning.] 

[kris-shepard]

[Kris lets out a heavy sigh and looks up from the floor, arms remaining folded across her chest.] Just before we stormed the prison and got everyone back. Thomas took it into his hands to start torturing Jessica. I don't know what in the fuck gave him the idea that he could do that because I sure as hell didn't. I came in and stopped it before things got really bad. Now, I don't care if she was turned out to be an enemy in the end, torturing people is not something we fucking do. It's not what I want this group to fucking be. 

[jack-isaacs]

[Jack holds Kris’s gaze for a moment when she’s done speaking, giving a small nod before he looks at the ground again.] Yeah. I know. [He answers softly, but even though he knows she means the words he also doesn’t think they’re true. People like Kris and Samson and Benjamin were always okay, and that’s what Jack wants to be, too. But he’s also pretty sure he hasn’t ever really been okay in a long time, and he glances sideways at Kris.] I’m not sure I really know what okay is.

[kris-shepard]

Yeah... I feel you on that one... [She says with a heavy sigh. It sound incredibly negative, but that's not the impression she wants to leave with Jack. Her own hope is dwindling, but she'll but on act and say otherwise if it meant keeping other people's spirits and hope up.] Definitions of "okay" are different now and definitely not the same, but you know what Jimmy told me a while back..? We'll get there. It won't be tomorrow, the next day, or maybe for a while, but one of these days, we'll reach and really be "okay". 

[benjamin-dewitt]

We’ll still go. {Benjamin says with a confident nod after a moment of consideration.} But we’ll bring someone else. Miss Tessa, Ah’ll let you pick the third person. Someone you trust. But Kris, you should stay here. Can’t have all of the council ambushed at once, if we can help it. {He gives a small, lazy shrug of his shoulders before a distant smile pulls at the corner of his lips.} My wife usually stopped working at about 32 weeks. Ah would’ve wanted her to stop earlier, but Ah never won a single argument ‘gainst my wife. Ah’d prefer you not go longer, but if ya’d like to stop patrols before, that’s fine. If ya don’t mind, however, Ah’m keepin’ you surrounded. Less patrol hours and two people on your shift. Don’t want anythin’ happenin’ that could’ve been avoided.

{And while Benjamin refuses to chastise Tessa like a child over the pregnancy, he does fix her with a stern look at the mention of stress.} This is a serious matter, Miss Tessa. Now, Ah’ve seen you workin’ your little rear off when things went a little haywire. Don’t you be lyin’ to me, girl, and sayin’ you never stress. 32 weeks. You stop there. Patrols. Council, unless it’s an emergency. Whatever ya don’t need to have a hand in, ya won’t. {His tone is serious but not condescending. Tessa doesn’t need that and Benjamin hopes she’ll simply listen to him.} After that little tyke is born, you won’t be goin’ back to patrols for awhile. Like Miss Rose. We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.

[tessa-campbell-archer]

[Tessa nods and keeps her mouth shut for the most part. She already has a few babies outfits she had taken from the mall. Small things she’s hidden in the backseat of her car, away from where anyone might see them.] Just don’t go out of your way, Kris. I can get what I need. [She says. Kris was constantly thinking about others and putting them first. The last thing Tessa had wanted to be was a burden. Kris had asked her for her help, and she didn’t want to become another issue to be dealt with, though it was a bit hard not to feel that way.]

[Ben says they’ll take a third person. Someone Tessa trusts and it hits her with a bit more pain than it should that the list of people she trusts is dwindling to nothing. Cian, maybe, if he ever came out of his car. Josie? Except the woman would probably call her an idiot. With the way Thomas had reacted to her going off earlier today it’s probably not a great idea to take him.] Okay, I’ll find someone. [She says with a nod and a smile that takes serious strength to muster and it’s tested when Ben tells her this is serious.] I know it’s serious, but talking about how stressed I am doesn’t make me less stressed. You guys are back in action, the demon is gone, it’s never not gonna be stressful but it’ll get better. [The mention of the maternity leave has her shrugging. It’s not because she doesn’t care, but more because she’s uncomfortable talking about it. She barely speaks about it with her husband because it so clearly bothers him, and after weeks of keeping it quiet it feels strange to be discussing it. She shifts uneasily and her arms twist across the swell of her stomach.] Let’s just cross all those bridges when we get to them. We don’t know where we’re gonna be in few months. Right now, I’m fine, he’s fine. I got this. So, what else do we have on the docket?

[kris-shepard]

[Kris wants to fight and argue the issue of her staying behind because she's feeling better and she feels the need to make up for all the work she wasn't able to do since she's been down and out, but Benjamin's right. And at least if she's standing watch, if something decides to hit them while they're away, Kris will be there to stand and defend. She lets out a sigh when Tessa asks what's next. What's next on the docket? Shit, she knows that the last thing that she wants to do is stress Tessa out but this was something that she needed to bring up.] I think we need to talk about Thomas. And no it has nothing to do with Tessa expecting. 

[benjamin-dewitt]

{Benjamin’s stomach drops and he can’t help the sudden wave of disappointment. He wouldn’t voice that to her. It wouldn’t help at all, even if Tessa doesn’t hold his opinion with much weight. And the emotion wouldn’t do any of them any good. She’s pregnant, and while he wishes she would’ve chosen better words than just “knocked up”, they have to plan for her pregnancy and delivery and spend less time chastising her on if the baby is irresponsible or not. Life had to be continued living, and while it might’ve been wise to try and secure a baby when they could find a safe place to settle, there would be another baby in the group whether they like it or not.

So Benjamin chooses his next words as carefully as possible, kind gaze upon a little girl growing up quickly.} If you feel you should step down, Miss Tessa, we aren’t gonna fight you on that. But, if you wouldn’t mind my opinion, Ah think you’d be doin’ it for the wrong reasons. If women in caves thousands of years ago didn’t get pregnant than we wouldn’t have a human race, and Ah’m thinkin’ their situation was fairly similar to ours.

{But Benjamin pauses for a minute, to collect his thoughts.} Now, most importantly, your health. Ah don’t want you stressin’ over group affairs when you’re cookin’ up a bun in the oven. And Ah don’t think you should be patrollin’ in this state. However, Ah know you well enough now to know that Ah can’t just force bed rest upon ya in a few months. We’ll find some things for you to do that’ll still be helpful to the group but are a little less jeopardizing to your health and Ah won’t be arguin’ with you on that. We gon’ keep this baby healthy and happy so that it pops out nice and strong.

[tessa-campbell-archer]

[Tessa shoves her hands in her pockets so they won’t see her clenched fists. She’s just waiting for the yelling, or for them to ask her to walk away, for the disappointment to show up on their faces. At Kris’s question she looks up and shrugs lightly.] I took a test maybe the first week we were at the mall? I tried to like, count shit out. I think I’m like fifteen weeks in. If I did the math right. [She explains. When Benjamin speaks up, she almost doesn’t to meet his gaze. It travels along the floor before finding his face. He says he thinks she’s stepping down for the wrong reasons and she just stares at him, a bit confused for a moment.] I just thought you guys would want me to. [She says, a bit dumbly. Instead of either of them telling her she was an idiot, or a child, or just plain reckless, Ben was going on about her health. Tessa wanted to run and hug the older man, and hold onto him for a moment jut to thank him for not making her feel as small as she had been making herself feel over the past few weeks. She doesn’t though, because he’s not her father nor is he someone she thinks she’s close enough with to do that, so she just straightens up and nods her head once, decisively.] Stress? I don’t stress. I’m awesome. [She says.] I can still do patrols for now, and I can do whatever else you need me to do. I won’t do anything stupid and I know that pretty soon I’m gonna have to take it slow, but for now I want to take advantage of the time I have left to be useful. Also, you guys are the only ones who know now… except Thomas. I don’t expect to keep it hidden, but I’m not really ready to advertise this. Especially not on the heels of losing people and getting rid of a demon and now finding these messages. We should just handle everything quietly. [She glances back at Ben and nods.] So, if you still want me Mr. Dewitt, I’m ready when you are to go check for more of those messages.

[kris-shepard]

[There's a slight twinge of minor anger when Tessa says that she took a test and found out at the god damn mall. That was ages ago and she didn't tell her about it then? God. And here Kris thought that Tessa considered her a close friend. But beyond that, she had kept this secret from them for so long  when really she should have told them right away because it didn't just affect her, but the entire group as a whole. But chastising her would do any good, not for Tessa, not for Kris and not for the group. They had to focus on the here and now and just getting ready.] I'm with Benjamin on this. Most of all, I just want you to take it easy as much as you can and think of your health first and foremost. I'm still gathering stuff for Noah, so I'll grab everything I can come across and we can even use Noah's stuff as handy-me-downs since they should fit. But Benjamin, it's your call if you want to take Tessa. If not I'll go instead. 

[jack-isaacs]

[It’s partly to due with the place his mind is in already, but Jack’s entire arm tenses when he sees her hand moving toward him. But no blow comes, just a hand wrapped comfortingly around his own, and while he can’t reciprocate the gesture right now he refrains from yanking his hand away from hers. His gaze remains fixed on the ground, but he’s grateful for the silence because he doesn’t think there’s anything she could say that would make him feel better about what he did. Or the fact that it’s something he’ll have to do again and again, and there’s no getting around it. He’s not sure how long he sits there before he lets out a long breath and finally turns to look at her, and he’s not sure if his words are more to convince her or himself.] I’m okay. Really. 

[kris-shepard]

I know... [Kris says quietly a she continues to hold onto his hand. Her eyes momentarily move to the ground and she lets out a quiet sigh before she look sup at him again and gives his hand a gentle squeeze with her own calloused and scarred ones.] But it's okay if you're not.

[jack-isaacs]

[For several long moments Jack is quiet, because he’s not sure how to answer her question. Even if he does want to talk about it he’s not sure he knows how to, and finally he lifts his shoulders in a small shrug before he speaks up in a quiet voice.] There was this guy with black marks. He was trying to kill me and Holly. She trapped him and I put a rock through his head. Then I shot him. Twice. To make sure he was dead. [He doesn’t look at Kris when he speaks, and as soon as he’s finished he’s disgusted with himself even though he still thinks it had been necessary. He’d seen too many monsters he thought he’d killed get back up and start fighting again to leave the man when he’d hit the ground.]

[kris-shepard]

[Kris's expression softens as she listens to Jack. It's not an elaborate telling of what happened but it's enough. She knows what happened and she can see it clearly in her head. For Kris, her first kill was not easy and took plenty of time to get past and by that point she was a full grown adult. Jack was still a growing teenager dealing with the apocalypse and now on top of that... he's finally taken a human life. She can only imagine how hard that must be for him. Kris remains silent, but she reaches over and takes his hand- part of her waiting for him to take his hand back and recoil.] 

[benjamin-dewitt]

Now, Ah’m not sayin’ that it is. And Ah reckon you might be right, Kris. But, for argument’s sake, what’s the likelihood of this bein’ Samson and the rest of ‘em? If they’re goal is California, could be headin’ down this road. Not like we’d been split consciously. Any effort to reconnect the group, well, Ah don’t see why it couldn’t be from ‘em. {Benjamin gives a light shrug of his shoulders. He agrees with both of the girls. Many Charlie’s in the world. But coincidence is not something the group had been experiencing much of recently.}

Keep this to yourselves. {He suddenly directs with a natural authority.} Don’t want anyone gettin’ their hopes up or losin’ their ever-lovin’ minds over a few messages. Meantime, Miss Tessa, you and Ah can scout out a few more places after you show me the one ya found. See if we can locate more signs from whoever wrote this.

{Benjamin’s lips curve into a thin, polite smile at Tessa as he nods his head, already making up his mind on the direction and he’s certain the young girl wouldn’t refuse.}

[tessa-campbell-archer]

[Tessa nods along, not feeling as though she has much of a place to contribute at this point. Really, it was whatever Ben and Kris decided. When she hears her name, Tessa raises her eyes to look at Benjamin, and something twists inside of her and she knows what it is, but she tries not to think about it and instead lowers her eyes to the ground. She wants to immediately say yes, but she knows that she’s not done telling them things they deserve to know.]

Alright, yeah, if you still want me to after I tell you this next bit. [She says, steeling herself at looking up at him with a brief nod, trying to be as detached and businesslike as possible.] I’m not sure if uh… Okay, it’s not that I don’t… balls. [Tessa sighs and wipes her hands over her face, because she’s not sure how to say it, and she knows she’s going to just have to come out with it, but she wishes there were a better way.] Alright, so I’m knocked up. [She says, dropping her hands and glancing briefly at the both of them before dropping her eyes to the floor.] And before you ask, yes, I’m sure. And even though I wouldn’t have a problem staying on and helping… I’m not sure I’m the kind of person you want, or anybody wants, making decisions for them. Because as far as fuck ups go, this one is pretty big. [She says, resting a hand over the small swell of her stomach, hidden mostly by the oversized flannel she’d been favoring the past few weeks. Tessa can feel her cheeks burning, and she rarely blushes so it only stings her pride all the more.] I’ll still help however and wherever you guys need me, I’m not telling you this because I want an out. I just think that this group needs people it can trust and rely on to make good decisions, and I’m literally going to a walking billboard of what not to do in the Apocalypse. If anything, people are going to lose respect for me, and when that happens it’s only going to make trying to enforce rules or doing anything even remotely ‘bossy’ that much harder, so… [Tessa shrugs and glances up again, trying to prepare herself for the fallout.] I just felt that you guys deserved to know what was going on, and, yeah.

[kris-shepard]

[Kris's brow puckers in confusion when Tessa says the part about still wanting her. But the next explanation has her eyes widening, heart stopping and stomach dropping to her feet. She's silent for a moment because all she's thinking of is what they're gonna need to do to make this as easy as they could for Tessa, thinking about what supplies they need and how to get ready. They did it with Rose and they can do it again. Though now dealing with two babies in the group was going to be difficult] Shit... when... when did you find out? [She manages to stammer out because to say that she's tongue tied, is an understatement.]

[rachel--foster-blog-blog]

[Rachel nods, understanding the concern. It was wise to have others with you as you went but she’d never really considered herself as alone. When Kris speaks, she shakes her head, shrugging slightly.] Oh, uh…just looking around, maybe see if I can find some art stuff…

[kris-shepard]

You mean like pens, paper or colored pencils or something? [She asks, her eyes glancing around the store as images of Katie's room filled to the brim with paper, paint, art supplies that spilled from her desk and onto the floor fill her mind.] 

[rory-lavery-deactivated20150203]

[Rory immediately looks up to the source of the voice, eyes blinking to adjust before she nods. She had, for the most part, been sticking to that. A moment lapse had led her to the wall. She grips the edges of her sleeves to cover her hands before attempting a pathetic excuse for a smile and an equally pathetic apology. But pathetic seems to be all she’s got in her, aside from fire.] Sorry.

[kris-shepard]

Apology accepted, just don't fucking do it again. [If Kris's words are harsh she doesn't care. They had enough problems on their hands and the last thing she wanted was to deal with a fire evacuation because someone thought it would be fun to light a wall on fire and lost control.] Why the in the hell were you burning the damn wall anyway?

[bella-barnett-blog]

[Bella nods. She expects the immediate reply to be something generic she says, but she hadn’t expected Kris to confide in her, or say anything else; of course, that hadn’t made her not want to ask. She puts on a more friendly smile, getting the sense that she should leave this woman to have her actual break soon.] Oh, yeah, I’m alright. Just taking the dogs for a walk. [Bella jokes, knowing Faith had heard that and will get her back for it.] Again, sorry to bother you, just with everything’s that’s been happening.. I don’t expect a lot of people ask you that, tends to happen when you’re a leader. 

[kris-shepard]

[Kris's eyes drift towards the dog and her lips press into the thin line because honestly she still doesn't know what the hell to think of that dog. Never really did since the day it suddenly showed up and she noticed. But it's not really important right now so she lets her eyes drift up back to Bella.] Nah, you're not bothering me. [She says with a shrug of her shoulders from her spot before she thinks about what Bella says next.] Well, I'd rather not give anyone much of a reason to ask me that, ya know? [She says because that's how she saw it. She should worry about everyone else and no one should have to worry about her. It was like that in the apocalypse and it was like that long before then.] 

[rose-benedict]

{Rose worries the inside of her cheek as she listens to the other’s words. She knows that. But right now she feels like the distance she’s putting between herself and everyone else is the only thing keeping her from falling apart. It’s the thin thread that’s keeping her together at the seams, and she’s already had a taste of what she’d be like without. She was a mess back at the campground. She can’t afford to break down like that again. It’s a difficult thing to do, almost against her very nature, but until she can be certain that she won’t lose it, it’s her only choice.} Thank you, Kris. {At least those words are honest.} I just can’t right now. {She offers a small smile in her direction, but the truth is it’s more for her benefit than anything else.}

[kris-shepard]

[There's a twinge a disappoint when Rose won't say anything, but as much as she wants to, Kris doesn't push.No good would really come of that, especially with god only knows Rose's current state of mind. So she just nods as she adjusts Noah in her arms slightly as his tiny hands curl around the fabric of her shirt.] Alright, but just... come to me when you're ready to. [Kris then takes a few steps out into the street.] C'mon let's walk up and down for a bit... I need to stretch out for a little bit.

[jack-isaacs]

[Jacks nods at her words, and he tries to reassure himself because that’s what he’d been doing. Trying to protect himself and Holly, and part of him wants to be the kind of person who’s desensitized to that but part of him is scared of the possibility. He keeps his gaze fixed on the ground at Kris’s question, and he doesn’t answer at first, just clenches his jaw because he’s not sure what to say. After a minute he shrugs.] Nothing that didn’t happen to everybody else. [It’s the truth. Everyone had been fighting other people in there, and Jack didn’t see them freaking out about it. There’s part of him that thinks maybe they should be, but he doesn’t want Kris to think that he can’t handle the same things everyone can so he keeps quiet.]

[kris-shepard]

[It's a simple phrase but it's telling enough. The prison was absolute chaos and it was people against people. Their side had one and others on the demon's side had died. Kris herself had cut down men left and right and gave the order to Natalie and Thomas that if they came across anyone not on their side, to take them out. It was easier for her to deal with because she had her mindset firmly in place thanks to years on the force, but for Jack? He was just a teenager. He was trying to prove himself that he was capable and he was an adult, but killing someone for the first time... that was hard to deal with and she understood that.] You wanna talk about it?

[rory-lavery-deactivated20150203]

[Rory doesn’t like the town they’re in. Despite the room it comes with, it also gives her weird feelings. At first, she’d attributed it to the fact that people had perished trying to get there. But as the days passed and through each of her lessons with Isobel, the weird feeling hasn’t faded. She’s staring now, at a wall that looks like it’s been drawn on countless times. It’s bugging her and the longer she stares, the more she feels her eye twitch, before she scorches the area. When it fades, she pulls her sweater to cover more of herself, mostly the bruises on her chest. Rory still doesn’t like the place, but she resists the impulse to burn the place to the ground.]

[kris-shepard]

[Kris inside making her rounds and silently checking up on the group as she is one to do. However, she comes to a stop when she sees one of the newer girls staring at the wall. She about to call out gently and ask if she's alright when suddenly apart of the wall lights on fire. Her muscles tense and she's just about to go forward to stomp the flame out when it fizzles out on its own. The gentle expression is gone in an instant when she looks at the girl who has been staring at the spot on the wall who had obviously caused it.] Yeah, I'd appreciate it, if you didn't do that again. [Kris say, her voice sharp and stern as she all but glares daggers down at the girl. The last thing they needed was their temporary shelter burning to the ground after all the shit they went through. She's already had a taste of that and she's got the burns on her arm to prove it.] If you want to practice your powers then take it outside and take someone with you. 

[bella-barnett-blog]

[Bella gets the feeling that she’d disturbed Kris’s break, and feels a little back because she’s obviously not 100% better. However, she won’t just walk away, even though she tucks her hands in her pockets and responds to Kris. Bella’s always found her a tiny bit intimidating, but she takes that as a sign of a good leader, which would describe Kris pretty well.] No, sorry. Just wanted to check up on you.

[kris-shepard]

[The fact that Bella says that she's checking up on her or just wanted to makes her take pause for a moment. She's barely spoke to Bella at all so that seems a bit strange and also she's just not used to people checking up on her. She's gotten used to people just assuming she's fine always out on the front lines and standing out front like the guard dog she's turned into. Whenever someone comes to check up on her, it always throws her for a loop.] Yeah, well... uh, I'm fine, thanks. [She says almost quickly.] Everything okay with you? 

[jack-isaacs]

[Jack listens to Kris with wide eyes and rapt attention as she shares her story. There’s already a lot of admiration for the woman despite any other conflicting feelings he has along with it, and that only increases as he listens to her. When she finishes he nods and looks out at the buildings surrounding them, trying to take comfort in the words. But there’s still a lingering doubt, and it’s several seconds before he can figure out how to word it.] So…you got used to it? [The notion doesn’t sit well with Jack, despite the fact that he thinks being used to that sort of thing is something he’ll have to do, something that will keep him and maybe other members of the group alive in the long run.]

[kris-shepard]

[Kris looks down and presses her cheek against the cold metal of her sword's sheathe before she answers.] Sorta of. I don't like saying "getting used to it" because it almost sounds like you get desensitized to it, but you kinda do. But you gotta keep in mind that you're doing what you need to do to protect yourself and the people here. [She then turns to look over at JAck and her voice goes a bit quiet.] Did something happen at the prison? 

[rose-benedict]

{Rose watches with detached interest the way Noah seems to cling at Kris’s shirt with everything he has. She idly wonders how much he can know about the woman whose arms he’s in. He obviously recognizes her, and needs her to an extent. How much is her question. Enough to want her when he sees her, that’s obvious. Beneath all those thoughts she’s relieved. If Kris hadn’t been treating the baby well he wouldn’t like her this much. The mother is distracted when Kris finally offers a response. She looks up and offers a polite smile.} I’m glad. {She says tersely. She still hasn’t been able to suppress everything, though she’s well on her way. Rose would leave the two alone, but right now Noah is the only one keeping her grounded. She expects she would spend hours just staring at a wall if she didn’t have him.}

[kris-shepard]

[Kris continues to smile down gently at Noah as she gingerly bounces on the balls of her feet. It's a motion she uses to normally to calm him down, but even though he's not fussing around anymore and is content with resting his small head against her chest and listening to the muffled sound of her heartbeat through the layers of clothes and bandages, it the action still feels natural. She looks up at Rose.] You know Rose, if there's something bothering you or if there's something you want to talk about, you can always talk to me about it. You know that right...? [She asks her voice suddenly quiet because she can't help but feel that there is something that Rose is hiding or just not talking to her about. When she came back out of the prison, Rose didn't look like herself. And Kris didn't blame her. She could only imagine what sort of hell Rose went through and what those bastards did. And if there's one thing Kris doesn't want for Rose to feel is that she has to hold it in and deal with it on her own. Kris knows what that's like. To be scared, broken and feel like you have no one to go to and have no one to go to. And she doesn't want that for Rose or anyone really. She wants Rose to know that she's here for her, she's just probably doing a shit job at it. ]