Life Update that nobody asked...
So ayun na nga, i started a new job and wala pa akong 1 month. But so far, okay ako sa environment, sa teammates, and workload. + may pogi akong ka-work skl. Then shit happened.... I am about to lay off. Not really lay off naman, oa lang ako hahhaha. Like malilipat lang ako ng different account, but i'm still employed in the same company.
i am shocked and sad. because what do you mean i waited 2 months for this job just to get lay off??? tho bago ako mag start, nag wo-worry na talaga ako na baka hindi ako matuloy dahil sa gulo ng mundo, then thankfully hindi naman binawi yung offer sakin and I started na this May. The reason why they hired new is because of their high volume hiring, tapos ngayon bumababa na yung volume, nag babawas sila ng tao. wtf! super late kasi nila ako pinag start date.
tapos this last few weeks, sinasabi na nga ng mga leaders na bumababa na yung volume hiring, ako as a new hire naisip ko na baka magbawas sila ng tao and putangina, tama nga ako hahahaha. idk naiisip ko talaga ganitong mga scenario but im still shocked kasi it actually happened. and ngayong alam ko na i realized na THERE ARE SIGNS or OA lang ako? or i have this "just in case" mindset
ayaw ko muna gumastos ng malala kasi hindi pa ako regular, you know, not because i have work na bibilin ko na lahat ng nasa cart ko hahhaha. Inuna ko lang yung mga essentials
sinasabi ng mother ko na hindi ako mareregular kasi lagi akong late hahhahaah (few mins lang naman). deep inside naiinis ako kasi parang wala syang tiwala sakin and gusto nya mangyari na hindi ako ma regular
"masaya ako na nakilala kita" as a joke from my workmate kasi may escalation sya and nag jojoke sya na baka matanggal sya, turns out ako ang matatanggal
naiisip ko na what if i-pursue ko yung ibang industry, but then since im okay dito sa new job ko, binalewala ko lang yun
i am praying lately na i-align ako ni Lord sa environment, people, and situation na para sakin.... tapos this happened.
parang, Lord eto na ba yun? ina-align mo na ba ako kung ano ang para sakin kasi i asked for it? if yes, please guide me. give me a lot of courage to keep going and to trust the process.
May nabasa ako na pag may changes sa life, people will experience uncomfyness, confusion, and it feels scary. and this is exactly what i am feeling right now.
im sad. im scared. idk what to do. idk what i want. idk what will happen to me.
when i found out, nawala ako sa wisyo. nawawalan na naman ako ng gana. gutso ko tanungin na "what did i do to deserve this?" but i am trying to think in a positive way na, everything happens for a reason. i asked for alignment and growth, baka eto na yun. I just really need to trust the process, trust and believe in myself, that everything will work out. I'll find where i belong, not now, but soon.



















