I know I haven't used my Tumblr in years but I really need to rant right now bc it's the only place I can without familiar eyes on me.
I'm begging. You most likely won’t see this, but if by some miraculous chance you do; don’t go into a self-hate, “I’m a bad boyfriend” break-up mode. Don’t say anything, just... respect my boundaries silently, that’s all I ask...
I'm extremely uncomfortable with constantly being hinted at a polyamorous relationship.
I thought about it for the entire 2 years we've been together and each time, I cannot see myself with multiple people, and at the beginning of the relationship, YOU DIDN'T EITHER. I was stupid enough back then to think I wanted two boyfriends before we got together, but neither of you were comfortable with it so I left it alone and NEVER pushed you about it after getting together.
I have tried imagining adding another person and it would immediately make me uncomfortable. I have absolutely no desire for another partner, ESPECIALLY not one just to fill in for when you can't fulfill my needs. I have ONLY EVER considered it for your sake.
I AM UNCOMFORTABLE and it’s even getting to the point where I’m uncomfortable around my female FRIENDS you’ve spoken to about our “situation”, telling them things like “it’s up to my gf if you want to join in” knowing FULL well how it makes me feel.
Every sigh and eye roll is a silent PLEAD for you to just stop and accept it and just love our relationship as it is with all of its faults, because I can't tell you directly.