Author's note: Been a while since I was hyperfixated on some tiny detail in this godforsaken fandom but ever since I've caught up with the manga, it's safe to say that I'm back on the bandwagon after 3? 4? Years? Anyways, I really need to debrief everything since chapter 129 dropped, so to start, here's a fun little compare and contrast session between my children: Atsushi and Akutagawa.
ps: you can find my other analyses right here! :)
Table of Contents:
Personality and Beliefs
Dazai's Influence
Symbolisms of Aesthetics
So, as we all know, the Shin Soukoku dynamic has been a significant element that had its depth, complexities, and meaning developed from the beginning. The main thing that distinguished these two characters from each other was the stark contrast heavily apparent between them. The contrast was not only found in their personalities, but also in their beliefs, appearances, and their values. However, similarities can also be found, such as the influence their named mentor, Dazai, had on their lives, as well as their backgrounds. And another thing is that makes them a bit different from the classic protagonist and antagonist dynamic is this:
They work pretty damn well together.
Here, I am going to touch on the differences and similarities both Atsushi and Akutagawa have. Moreover, I thought it’d be fun to also analyse their real-life author counterparts, and find out more about who they were really inspired by. Possible spoilers will be highlighted in red :)
PERSONALITY & BELIEFS
To start, we’ll talk about Atsushi. At first, we see him as weak-willed, self-pitiful, and a person who simply wants permission to live. His trauma heavily influenced his personality, with self-pity, helplessness, and a low self-esteem being the by-product of mistreatment and abuse, both physical and verbal. Atsushi is the classic protagonist that you either can’t help but feel sorry for or annoyed at. And of course, there is a grey area where people do actually resonate with him.
Nevertheless, Atsushi was simply trying to find meaning in life ever since the beginning (Which is ironic, considering the fact that the first person he met was Dazai). Aside from these trauma-induced traits, Atsushi is kind, and has always had a sense of selflessness and justice since the beginning. This is shown at his first test preceding his admission into the Armed Detective Agency and how he treated Kyouka. Ever since then, we see more major events displaying this side of him, as his resolve becomes stronger.
Personally, I believe that Dazai’s advice to him to “stop pitying” himself was the key to unlocking his full potential. Self-pity is self-destruction, no matter how traumatic one’s past was. Atsushi’s wake-up call was just that. His quote:
“People need to be told they’re worthy of being alive by someone else or they can’t go on.”
was a crystalline reflection of his personality. He not only needed someone to push him to unlocking his potential but also people that cared about him and vice versa to grow up around. Protecting the people around him essentially became his reason to live, because in the later chapters, where he is presented with imminent defeat by watching the people he loved “die” by Kamui’s sword, he was helpless. This boy had acquired enough to the point that he had a lot to lose. And while that is a dangerous thing to rely the meaning of your life upon, it did spark a great deal of courage, resolve, and sense of justice in Atsushi. I’d like to think that his selflessness is both his blessing and his curse.
Now, let’s talk about his alleged ‘opposite.’ Akutagawa is far more daunting and intimidating than Atsushi at first. But when both their beliefs are presented to us side-by-side, that’s where we find differences, not flaws in one character or the other.
Akutagawa also comes from a background of abuse and poverty, which yields several effects of trauma. Just in a very different way. Akutagawa has had resolve ever since the beginning, but most of it lied in the wrong reason: to acquire the approval of the only person he respected in his entire life: Dazai.
And ever since Atsushi’s alliance with the ADA and Dazai himself, that resolve was heavily impacted by envy, multiplying his raging will to try harder. And although Akutagawa disagreed with Dazai leaving the Port Mafia to join the ADA, the need for his approval never left, as Dazai successfully implemented the idea of him never being good enough into his head.Aside from envy, Akutagawa’s resolve was apparent even before he joined the Mafia.
It was said that he had friends from the slum he had the intent to avenge, but that intention was put to a stop when Dazai offered him and Gin enough money to get out of poverty, or a place in the Mafia. He chose the Mafia, and the resolve to avenge his friends turned into proving himself to Dazai.
That doesn’t discount his loyalty to the Mafia, however. His accomplishments were numerous, but to him? Inadequate until his mentor acknowledged him as ‘good enough.’
In the later chapters is when we see Akutagawa’s character develop slightly away from that direction, as the time to work together with Atsushi came to defeat other higher powers. Yes, as much as he mentioned his intention to kill Atsushi wasn’t gone, his character reached its climax around the time of his sacrifice for Atsushi. I believe that this was the time rivalry and the need for approval was put aside in order to clarify one thing about Akutagawa: he was not as remorseless and apathetic as he presented himself to be. Honestly, he was just trying to find his way through life with the circumstances he was in. He was just trying to do what he thought was right, just like Atsushi.
Both were volatile in nature. Both had willpower, grit, and weaknesses. Both had something to fight for. Both felt inferior. Both had resentment to their mentors. Both carried trauma. Both looked for validation. The difference is that one was valued despite his shortcomings, while the other was not acknowledged despite his achievements.
And what of the actual authors?
Nakajima Atsushi was an accomplished poet, well-versed in areas of Chinese poetry, Japanese history, Western, Egyptian, Greek, and Assyrian literature and philosophies. In his writings, which were highly introspective, his character of nobility, intense curiosity, and compassion was highly evident and appraised. His intelligence was significantly apparent in the way he wrote with dignity and grace. Unlike his peers, her refused to write and publish Japanese propaganda during his time of living. Nakajima died at the age of 33, around the time he was just getting started in his successful career as an author.
Ryūnosuke Akutagawa was known as the Japanese father of short stories, with Rashōmon, The Nose, and The Hell Screen standing as one of his most famous literary works. Akutagawa’s mother went insane after his birth, which he regarded as something he inherited. His works were highly psychological, critically dissecting moral questions and humanity via narratives. He was inspired and encouraged by Natsume Soseki after the publication of Rashōmon. Sickly and intensively emotional by nature, Akutagawa grew to suffer from nervousness and hallucinations, especially after him and his family’s escape from the Kanto earthquake. He took his life at the age of 35. With how esteemed he was in the literature community, this shocked many, including Osamu Dazai, who was heavily inspired by his works. Both their author counterparts’ personas are evident in the fictional characters themselves. Take what you want about their similarities and differences. Essentially, Nakajima Atsushi died too young before pursuing his dream as an accomplished writer, while Akutagawa took his life too young despite his talent and accomplishments.
DAZAI'S INFLUENCE
The discourse/possible controversy about how Akutagawa was treated compared to how Atsushi was is completely justifiable, because obviously one was treated better than the other. But I think the main reason for that was that Dazai was two different people for each of them.
I think the best way to explain the type of psychological state Dazai carried throughout this arc is by first explaining the types of philosophies very much present in the entire BSD universe— nihilism, existentialism, and perhaps a little bit of absurdism. There's also what we know as cynicism, skepticism, and pessimism present in the details, because maybe all these philosophies don't exist solely on their own, but are coexisting with each other constantly. It all comes down to the type of media we see or the kind of individual we are, but I'm digressing right about here.
This source and this source broke down the above-mentioned philosophies quite well, but I'll summarise it here. Before that, there's something I need to define: intrinsic meaning, which is meaning that is not created, but is already existent/present.
Nihilism: the belief that there is no intrinsic meaning in the universe, and that it is pointless to create one for ourselves.
Existentialism: the belief that there is no intrinsic meaning in the universe, but it is up to an individual's willpower and free will to create their own meaning or in other words, their own world.
Absurdism: the belief that there search for meaning is pointless, but rebelling against this fact is important for one can take advantage of whatever life has to offer.
Pessimism: the belief that nothing good will happen, and it only gets worse henceforth.
Skepticism: the belief that nothing is true at face value unless substantial evidence is provided; the practitioners of doubt.
Cynicism: skepticism with an extra step— believing that altruistic organisations or people have a hidden agenda, and that one should act out of their own self-interest and reject social conventions.
So with all that being said, Dazai seemed to be more of a nihilist during the Dark Era arc, don't you think? Now imagine having that as a mentor. Good Lord.
Jokes aside, Dazai's nihilism was present ever since the Fifteen Arc. Remember that scene where Chuuya was freaked the fck out at how Dazai kept shooting a dead guy?
He was lost. I mean, Oda was really all he had if you discount Chuuya. As a nihilist, to consistently believe that there was no meaning to life, and to turn yourself over to to a life of violence and brutality (absurdism) whilst carrying out your duties with strategy and wit at such a young age, you can't expect much of a stable mentor. That would've been intense for Akutagawa, considering that he was younger than him as well.
Still, Akutagawa was yielded into one of the most resilient and ambitious subordinates that Mafia had. He was feared, in fact, and that speaks volumes about how he was raised.
Dazai's abuse was inexcusable. I feel like he played around with Akutagawa's ego and self-esteem a lot. That was wrong, but that also made Akutagawa the way he was. Or at least, contributed significantly to it. However he behaved apart from wanting Dazai's approval and from his envy of Atsushi is evidence that he did undoubtedly grow over time. There was an air of duty to do what was right revolving around him in the later chapters. Call it absurdism or plain existentialism— his character has developed.
And what about how Dazai was when he looked over Atsushi? Well, there are three ways for those that believe there is no intrinsic meaning in the universe:
Philosophy suicide: completely embracing a belief framework (spiritual or religious), because it is unbearable for an individual to go on without one.
Physical suicide: just because life is too mundane, boring, and pointless without intrinsic meaning.
Acceptance: coming to terms with the fact that ultimate meaning is impossible to achieve, but going on with life either ways.
We can obviously tell that Dazai is leaning towards the second way, but at the same time, lives out his life in the third way, too. He just doesn't admit it. There are several panels in the manga and statements in the anime that testify to the fact that Dazai had accepted things as they are. The advice he's given to Atsushi, the small moments where he's shared some of the meanings he gives to specific concepts: it isn't purely/significantly nihilistic and absurdist anymore. It's embracing existentialism, too. His conversations with Fyodor and their similar yet eventually conflicting idealogies also reflect this fact.
If you've read Dazai's No Longer Human, you'll find themes of existentialism in Yozo (the main character) imbued with sentiments of absurdity and nihilism. Yozo is a complex character. His journey to search for meaning in living mimics existentialism. The conclusions he arrives at every observation of humanity points back to nihilism, because Yozo 'finds nothing' behind the reasons of why humans act the way they do and deems their behaviour as mundane and dull. His habits of alcoholism and suicidal thoughts touch on absurdism, as it is the conflict of finding meaning and accepting that there is no meaning. Absurdism, however, is incomplete at this stage— because Yozo eventually commits suicide instead of making use of whatever life had to offer him.
In terms of Dazai's character in BSD, I believe he is mostly an existentialist. He just tries to hide it. Countless suicide attempts, and he's not gotten anywhere. I hope I'm not fucking jinxing this. So again, imagine that as a mentor.
From one person who's been exposed to a very dark side of the world whilst simultaneously living through it in his own head day-to-day, to another boy who was brought up in abuse, mistreatment, and the lack of meaning— I think it's important to bring up Dazai's turning point, which was Oda's last words to him:
“You should know this yourself. No matter whether you’re on the side of killing people or saving people, there will never be anything that can surpass your mind. There is no place in this world that can fill your loneliness. You will linger in the darkness forever."
"Since both sides are the same, become a good person. Save the weak, protect orphans. Regardless of whether it’s justice or evil, to you, there isn’t a big difference between the two… But, doing that would be better.”
Dazai was given purpose, even though his loneliness had no cure. He chose to be on the better side because well, Oda was his mentor after all. He had a role model. He had someone to respect. Dazai's turning point yielded just the mentor Atsushi needed— someone who not only saved him, but so taught him how to save himself. Someone who didn't impart his own trauma onto him, but someone who encouraged him to be the best version of himself.
The contrast on how Dazai treated both of them deeply reflects on his character development. The type of mentees mentors raise is dependent on their own beliefs, ideologies, and philosophies anyway. Of course, it's highly critical as well, considering the fact that Atsushi's caretaker at his orphanage significantly impacted his self-worth while Akutagawa carried a sense of inadequacy all along despite his achievements.
SYMBOLISMS OF AESTHETICS
So this part is more or less a colour analysis section. Let’s talk about their appearances. Atsushi is presented in lighter colours, while Akutagawa is darker in aesthetic. Well, you could make a light correlation with the Chinese Yinyang concept. Yin is the representation of earth, femininity, darkness, and passivity. Yang symbolises heaven, maleness, and light. Yin is represented by the colour azure and the tiger, while yang is represented by the colour orange and the dragon.
Ironically enough, Ryūnosuke was the name given to the actual author as it meant dragon, and he was born in the year of the dragon according to the Chinese zodiac. His ability’s colour is also close to the colour orange— red (yang). And as for Atsushi, well, his ability Beast Beneath the Moonlight turns him into a white tiger. And the aura surrounding his ability? It’s blue (yin). And although the darkness and light aspect contradicts their overall aesthetic and personality, it’s just fun to link this to that. I’m not even sure if this was intended by Asagiri and Harukawa, but I do know that the colours of red and blue carry some amount of significance, especially considering the fact that the original Soukoku duo share the same aesthetics when it comes to their ability. I was planning to an analysis on them next, maybe I’ll go more in depth about this over there :)
So what about the colours of red and blue? According to a source about Reiki energy, red symbolises passion, courage, and intensity. It is often associated with our primal instincts, strong emotions, and sparks ambition. Blue provokes feelings of serenity, calm, and peace, reflecting the colours of the sky. Together, they achieve a balance of harnessing our capabilities to pursue ambitions and nurturing a life with inner peace and stability.
I find the red and blue dynamic always interesting— they contrast in warmth and hue, which is evident in the way characters are associated with them. Both Akutagawa and Chuuya are obviously choleric in nature, but also resilient in whatever they do. On the other hand, Atsushi and Dazai are presented to be in pursuit of tranquility, calm, and peace.
This section’s debrief was just for fun, honestly. I just think the play on colours and aesthetics had some amount of intent put into it :) Whatever philosophy it’s founded upon, it’s nice to think about.
CONCLUDING REMARKS
That’s all I could speculate on for now. If you’ve read to this point, thank you! Just know that I’m open to discussion— that’s literally the only reason why I came back to tumblr lol. Atsushi and Akutagawa serve as a really complex duo. Their original counterpart— Soukoku— is going to be really fun analysing, too. From aesthetics, abilities, personalities, to their real-life author counterparts, BSD still proves to be one of the most symbolic animanga’s I’ve ever come across. Additionally, the blue and red dynamic is more common that we think, so it was fun getting into the latent meanings present in these characters.
i have like 4 fics left in my drafts from... 2021? 2022? i wanna get back to writing ;-; but my views on romance have changed so much pls i'm full on wlw now HAHAHAHAHAHAHA oh well still contemplating between keeping this acc and @n1kolaiz or just making a new one...
ok i deleted my entire announcement saying i was gonna stop writing fanfics blah blah bc someone made me second guess my decision 😒 then i saw the latest chapter and was sure of my decision LMFAOSKS anyways moots if u still wanna be mutuals i moved to @swrdemon !! this is probably the last post on this blog unless i wanna write for bsd or any other fandom ever again 🧐
ok i deleted my entire announcement saying i was gonna stop writing fanfics blah blah bc someone made me second guess my decision 😒 then i saw the latest chapter and was sure of my decision LMFAOSKS anyways moots if u still wanna be mutuals i moved to @swrdemon !! this is probably the last post on this blog unless i wanna write for bsd or any other fandom ever again 🧐
Idk when you’ll see this but happy New Years ryley!!!! 💗💗💗💗
SASHA i'm so glad i decided to come online before it was too late to reply this HAHA but happy new year's to you too <3 i haven't gotten back to your ask (the one from a month ago IM SO SORRY IDK HOW YOURE SO PATIENT WITH ME 😭) so i'll definitely be back to talk to you very soon i promise I MISS U
Characters: Dazai Osamu, Chuuya Nakahara, Kunikida Doppo
Genre: Fluff drabbles, slightly more bittersweet for Dazai’s part
Warnings: None
A/N: Trying out a new format, so I hope it turns out good. Kunikida’s part had been inspired by @sonder-paradise. I really wanted to write a little something for the holidays, so I hope you guys enjoy! Merry Christmas everyone, and if you don’t celebrate it, happy holidays <3
My Masterlist
❥ 𝔻𝕒𝕫𝕒𝕚 𝕆𝕤𝕒𝕞𝕦
Going to a Christmas Market
There was something about the simple act of walking beside you that filled Dazai with sense of warm in his heart.
Though perhaps one might say that the festivities he had planned for the two of you for the day were lacking what is considered a Christmas cheer at this time of the year. However, seeing your hair feathered with beautiful fluffs of white snowflakes, feeling the warmth of your hands intertwined in his own, even in its simplicity, it filled him with fondness.
HI HII *cracks knuckles* SO may I request having a cute little aquarium date with Gin please ty,,
𝐀𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐦 𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐞 — 𝐆𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐤𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐰𝐚
On Gin’s day off, you had invited her to an aquarium. Of course, she had never been to one before. Her brother might have briefly talked about it previously, but she had never gone herself. You had to admit she seemed rather excited upon meeting up with her.
She had promised to meet up with you at the train station before heading to the aquarium and Gin was ever so happy to see you arrive on the platform. Her eyes shortly twinkled at the prospect of a wonderful day with you.
I assume she would be primarily quiet during these times. She’s either too caught up on the idea of trying to figure out what one does at an aquarium or she’s thinking about how she can take your hand in hers without being too awkward.
“Are you excited?”
She would only nod eagerly, slipping her fingers in between yours and giving your hand a timid squeeze. Gin’s excitement could only just barely be contained upon exiting the train station. Up ahead, you could see the brilliant blue, aquamarine colors of the aquarium.
Gin adores watching the fishes the most. Her onyx eyes light up when she spots the overturning columns and spiraling tanks surrounding the two of you. A soft gasp leaving her lips when you point upwards at a flying manta ray.
She occasionally points towards the deep blue tanks filled with fish, the shades of the rainbow. Colorful pieces of coral tower above the tall water-filled tanks and she can’t help but chat a bit to you about which fish they are.
You think she would go on this little aquarium date with you without having done her homework?
“I remember that one. It was called an Ocellaris clownfish, like the one in that movie!”
It’s always such a joy to watch that child peek out from her. But, of course, she snaps a couple pictures here and there when she spots you having a rather entertaining time with the starfish.
Your little aquarium date comes to a close with a short stop to the gift shop. Gin always picks up a little something for Akutagawa. He might appreciate the little black orca whale keychain. At least, Gin seems to think so.
Of course, neither of you leave empty-handed either. She’ll plop a little penguin plush in your arms while the matching pair is hooked around her other arm. Yes, they’re the cute plushies that have the velcro paws so they can hold hands-
Someone get me a Gin istg
During the train ride back home, she tells you about how much fun she’s had. Gin isn’t usually very expressive about these types of things. But from the way she allows you to lean your head against her shoulder, she’s more than happy to have spent the day with just you.
Her times in the mafia are usually so bloody and gruesome. It’s bittersweet to remember that perhaps things are just a little calmer when she’s with you and your little penguin plushies now.
dude i started binge reading your works and i’m shatting ENAMOURED. i literally can’t get enough. you’re amazing, your writing is amazing, thank you for blessing us peasants with it.
BRUHSJDJS YOURE SO FUCKING SWEET?????? thank you thank you thank you!!!! you're amazing, and definitely not a peasant omfg i'm the peasant trying to come up with new works 🤔 thank u for giving me the motivation i needed anon <333333
◊ Is utterly amazing at decorating them. Has the most beautiful cookies and makes the frosting with just the right amount of sweetness. Manages to make the cookies look like pieces of art and then insists on feeding one to you just to test taste it of course and smiles when your eyes light up.
◊ Does their best regardless of the outcome and manages to make it seem pretty easy. Isn't as confident in their frosting skills but they feel a little better when you insist that it's still good. Taste tests it at least four times just to make sure that you're not lying. Probably makes a mess accidentally.
— Atsushi Nakajima, Yukichi Fukuzawa, Junichiro Tanizaki, Kyouka Izumi, Michizo Tachihara, Kyusaku Yumeno, Edgar Allen Poe, Lucy Montgomery, Mark Twain, Ango Sakaguchi
◊ Forget the cookies, they were never meant to be. In addition to that, forget your kitchen too. Somehow they will burn your kitchen down just trying to frost those damn cookies. Sure, you'll somehow end up in a chaotic frosting competition with them, but while you're roasting and toasting by the fire starting on your stovetop.
☆ authors note : ik its been a long time since I’ve been here but things have been happening (good things thank goodness) and I haven’t been able to think about bsd, tr, or even anime for that matter. Lately my free time has been devoted to other hobbies I’ve been picking up, but this does not mean I am going to stop writing, expect more coming your way if everything goes as I planned :))
HIS LIPS ARE so, so cold. It was like kissing a snowman. You smiled at your own silly thought as your wrapped your arms around his neck. You tasted the hot chocolate on his lips, stealing the sweetness that’s left on the smile of your lover.
Atsushi pulls back, the happiness on his face like a contagious warmth that spreads to your smile. Even as you scold at him to pull up his winter scarf, his radiating joy fails to stay hidden underneath the warm wool. “You’re so cold, Atsushi. Why didn’t you wear your scarf properly?”
He doesn’t answer for a moment, taking your hand into his. “I wanted to give you this first kiss into the new year. The perfect kiss. Right when the clock struck twelve.” He laughs to himself. “I wouldn’t want to embarrass myself and kiss you a second late because of a scarf, now do I?”
“Why-“ you stopped yourself, following his glance as he watches other couples around you in the moment, with laughter, and arms around each other, and smiles and whispers of what you could only guess could be sweet nothings to the other’s ear. Why on earth would a timed kiss matter, Atsushi?
He turns to you shyly, as he says, “I wanted to give you an important kiss at the start of the year, as everyone does every new year.”
You cup both of his cheeks in your hands, looking into his eyes. “Atsushi. Every one of your kiss is a perfect kiss. Every single one. It’s a kiss without you that’s imperfect, darling.”
He seems unconvinced. Hesitant, even, to believe your words.
“So this is a perfect kiss,” you mumble, kissing the corner of his lips, off to the side of his face. It felt awkward, like an arrow narrowly missing it’s target. Unbothered by this, you sense his stillness.
“And this is a perfect kiss.” You kiss his nose, leaving your lips to his skin a little longer than normal, before pulling away.
“Love, that’s not what I-“ You silence him with your lips on his, and he kisses back.
His lips leave yours as he pulls back. “What were you about to say, handsome?”
“God, I love you so much.”
i finished this at like september 10 end me ;-;
edit: GUYS IVE HAD ENOUGH ITS NOT GETTING POSTED NEAR CHRISTMAS I WONT BE ABLE TO WAIT THAT LONG
edit edit: I just realized I completely skipped Christmas and straight to New Years whoops
taglist : @nameless-shrimp @finniesblog @duckiichan @kazubxnii @n1kolaiz @weebumochi ! please feel free to join my taglist here ! (ahhh yes I use my taglist for the 1st time >.<)
I’m so late but congrats on 300, my love, if anyone deserves it, it’s you aka truly one of the best writers out there! <3 you’re v important to me and I hope whatever you’re doing rn that you’ll have the best day ❤️
also my usual meme for you 😈 not exactly accurate because younger you was probs my gay awakening but nvm you’re still sexc ig (affectionate)
BEYWKWJDJWDJ FUCK YOU RIN I GIGGLED LIKE A FUCKING MANIAC BC OF THIS
BUT thank u my beloved ur vvv important important me too + one of my fave writers ever!! /gen ilysm hope ur doing okay (hey if younger me was ur gay awakening is older me keeping u awake all night is that why u have a horrible sleep schedule 🤔)
Hiii Ryleyy hru doing? :D I hope everything's all good in your life <3
I haven't played valorant in literally three-four weeks and went on for the first time tonight and I shit you not my aim has turned to actual trash T^T
my god and my game sense has decreased sm jfdsklfjdks i needa play more soon :'D
also this yoru was fucking with me for the longest time with his stupid little blinds and I was gonna molly his ass if he hadn't kill me first 😤
ARIEL IM REPLYING THIS SO LATE IM SORRY
i'm doing okay how are you doing?! hope everything's going well for u!
DUDE I HAVENT PLAYED IN LIKE A MONTH?!?!? AND IM SO SCARED TO TOUCH THE GAME BC I HAVE A FEELING A DEFEAT STREAK IS COMING FOR MY ASS LMFAO i totally get where ur coming from there was this once i took a break for like 4 days and when i came back i fell back by one rank 😭😭😭😭😭 someone said consistency is rlly important for games like these BUT HOW TF DO PPL PLAY EVERY SINGLE DAYY AHHHH genuinely hope you get to play more and beat ppl's ass 😤 ty for dropping by ngl this makes me wanna play i'll drop by your inbox once i get my ass handed back to me 😒
YORU'S BLINDS JSDJDNDJD istg he's so frustrating to deal with!?!!&#&#&@;' duelists are so technical and fast they're just so annoying when they're really good lmao THOUGH IT IS RLLY FUNNY WHEN THEY ACCIDENTALLY BLIND THEMSELVES BC IK I'D DO THE SAME IF I PLAYED W YORU OR PHOENIX HAHA controller mains are supreme i respect the amount of patience we have 😤💪
i hope everything’s well with you too!! i’m doing p good these days :) just a little tired from college apps
i’m playing a lot more often and it’s been very much fun 😩😩 my aim got a lot better and i keep buying new skins whenever i see them- but idk how ppl play everyday it’s insane i would get tilted 😭
duelists make me wanna commit arson istg jett’s knives are infuriating but the new agent chamber came out recently and his abilities are literally just better sniping guns and teleportation and he makes me wkoasmossm anyways tested out killjoy recently cause i needa learn a new agent 😔
good to hear ur doing okay! hope u get to rest up whenever u can good luck with college stuff too <3
YES V PROUD OF U consistency definitely pays off 😤 kinda wanna start playing again bc whenever we talk about it i get mad excited lmao DUDE YES SKINS YOU CAN NEVER GO WRONG WITH THEM their designs are so pretty i try to steal one every time a player dies bc somehow they're way nicer to use? i kinda wanna get a new skin which one is ur fave to use atm!!!!
jett's knives ☺ istg ☺ arson is the perfect term ☺ CHAMBER? DUDE IVE BEEN OFFLINE FOR SO LONG I SAW THE ARCANE POSTERS BUT DIDNT THINK IT THRU WHEN I SAW THE NEW AGENT I WAS LIKE "oh cool art" I DISNT KNIW THERE WAS A NEW AGENT WHAT THE FHCK IS HE NICE TO USE? and omg i see a kj arc developing /lh how's it like using her?? viper or kj 🤨⁉️
i’ve been getting a little too addicted to it 🤭 lmaoo exactly when you steal their skin it’s just so powerful 🤧 my favorite right now is my forsaken gold vandal but i have a small attachment to my white onii phantom
JSKSMS HES KINDA COOL a pain to play against if they’re good with oping but he has teleportation, slows, and sniping guns that are honestly insanely cool. actually just finished watching arcane and it was so good- and tbh right now i’ve been using kj more 😔😔 i’m sorry but her little turret is so fun. but i use her most for bind and split since one of my party members is also a viper main
i trust vandal and phantom users so much IDK WHY LDDJKDJD but i will check out those skins soon probably need smth new to motivate myself to play again 😈 chamber sounds rlly cool holy fuck definitely gonna get annoyed with him as much as i get annoyed with yoru mains LMFAO AND U WATCHED ARCANE OMG i haven't finished it but goddamn the animation the graphics the storyline is just pure GOLDDD HAHAHA USING KJ'S TURRET i'd expect that to feel powerful so it's totally understandable fully support the idea of annoying the shit out of the opposing team bc you've felt their pain at some point 😯💨
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