Peter Solarz
tumblr dot com
🪼
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
noise dept.
#extradirty
NASA
KIROKAZE
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Product Placement
Not today Justin
Stranger Things
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
One Nice Bug Per Day
i don't do bad sauce passes
titsay
d e v o n
trying on a metaphor
JVL
seen from Malaysia
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seen from Australia
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seen from Ukraine
seen from Germany
seen from Argentina
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@l0lam0ntez
two million people starving to death because it's geopolitically convenient and we're all expected to go about our day normally like the casual cruelty on display for the past two years has been so insane to me like i'm not even trying to make a point it's just truly something i can't wrap my mind around
Yall know what’s worse than a job?
An unpaid internship.
I’m grateful to be graduating into a career that I love and I really want to make a difference- but 6am hits different when nothing hits your bank account 🫠
Since Tumblr and Twitter (may she RIP) raised my children, it’s only fair I post my last baby graduates this weekend. She was my inspiration for most of my Tweets, she’s funny, she’s smart, she’s determined to be an airline pilot (if we can afford to help her get through school) and she’s graduating high school with a 4.5 GPA and most of her associates degree.
This girl is on fire 🔥
As someone who lurks here plenty but never posts I have been in the midst of some very not cool events and decided to write some of them out. Last Friday I was headed to an engagement at the local volunteer event that I do and I had gotten a CT the day before to check on a kidney stone and my doctor called and said he needed me to show up at the OR immediately due to kidney “death” and it was an emergency so naturally I showed up and immediately began to spiral over going into surgery and losing my position in an internship I was supposed to start today but low and behold the stones were not going to allow that to happen. Once I left surgery I was discharged and told to rest which sure yeah that’s possible but within a few hours the stent had fallen out and I was leaking fluid and toxic ooze all over and I went to the ER where a very nice nurse tried to help me but had never done this before and my entire body was shutting down I felt awful and there was infection and suffice it to say this has been the worst weekend in many maybe of my life. But as of 10am this morning my stents are all removed, my child got to see me at her college graduation even if I was in pain the entire time and I am glad to be on the mend.
I’m grateful for every day lately and need to express it.
The world is burning and everything is shit but I just finished the original Dexter series and I forgot how dirty they did it. Deb had a blood clot?! He decided to be a lumberjack? I know you shouldn’t root for the villain but damn. I should be doing homework but I chose a field that’s basically obsolete so I’m just gonna rewatch another show.
As you were.
I got an email today from 23 and Me telling me I had new connections and I went to check who they were and it said I had a half-sister and I was like holy shit the tea?! And she has the same initials as my sister and my wheels started turning and I spent a good hour trying to see who it was and then I looked at the percentage and it dawned on me it was not a half sister but probably my niece who also had those initials and the percentage was that of a niece so all my scandalous thoughts of my parents went to the wayside. Jump the shark much 23 and me. 😒
Now my husband is doing a DNA test so I guess we’ll find out which of these kids are actually his 😆
I’m rewatching Dexter on my break because I love being disappointed on purpose apparently but this show slayed for a few seasons all puns intended.
I got all A’s and one B and damn if that doesn’t hurt but I got some extra credit for writing maybe I should be doing that instead with my life.
There is so much drama in my husband’s family and I want to call in sick for Christmas because I have too much on my plate and it’s not food.
I got my braces off and my retainers today and holy shit do these things hurt. I’d be better off getting round house kicked to the face than what I paid for these luxury bones.
We’re going to Niagara Falls over vacation and I accidentally booked a hotel on the Canadian side and I’m the only one with a passport and imagine if we didn’t have borders…
A few weeks ago I accidentally had some Christmas packages sent to my old address where my in-laws used to live and they’re obviously not there anymore so I called and asked them if they knew the guy and if they thought he would mind if I go over there and pick them up They said he seemed nice but he had some big dogs so I rolled up and knocked on the door and nobody was coming to the door so I started walking away and then I heard the door open and I turned and I saw a giant pitbull running straight for me And before I had the opportunity to freak out, he yells don’t worry he doesn’t bite and he stopped in front of me and wagged his tail, and I gave him so many pets and I waited with him while he went inside and got my packages and ever since then I’ve considered mailing some more packages to that address just so I can back and give him some more scritches.
(Also, I made my husband come with me just in case they tried to 🔫🔪🪓 me so you know both of us could get 🔫🔪🪓together rendering our children parentless)
The only thing that makes me happy this time of year is being able to give back but you got me fucked up if you think I’m giving to the Salvation Army. Give me kids who need gifts and presents and I’m all about it, but that red bucket can beat it.
As part of trying to do more with what I have I’ve been volunteering for some opportunities in my field of future work and it’s so much more rewarding than what I’ve done up until now. Like subway and Burger King weren’t filling my cup, who knew. They filled my kids’ bellies and our needs when it mattered so I’ll try and keep the hate to a minimum.
I’m likely going to lose my 4.0 this semester math has bested me once again and I can’t even blame “boys” like when I was in high school god knows those don’t distract me anymore. Seriously these kids own one pair of underarmour sweatpants and a hoodie and that’s what they wear on a consistent basis. At least they’re minimalists I suppose.
Speaking of I’m doing limited Christmas this year and we are taking a family trip to New York to see some sights and Hugh Jackman on broadway so they all get like 5 gifts instead of 10 or maybe 7 we’ll meet in the middle.
My braces come off in 2 weeks and I’m sure nobody will even notice the change but I will. It’s crazy what teeth will lead people to believe about you. Especially in a country where they cost entire thousands of dollars to take care of.
I should be writing something that is taking my will to live but my professor said I’m using too many “big” words and I need to simplify to better get my point across.
It’s like she doesn’t even know who I am.
The only thing I miss about Alabama is how good my nails and hair looked.
Consider this my #TBT
I had to deep dive my old blog for a writing assignment and damn do I miss that hair.
Not Alabama though.
"Fuck this shit"
Seen outside The Linden, new Luxury Apartments in West Philadelphia. Most of the units and every store are currently vacant because the monthly rent is triple the rest of the neighborhood. A few days ago 17 windows were smashed and painted messages were left.
The Rent Is Too Damn High: The Affordable Housing Crisis, Explained
Where's that tweet about people still living long fulfilling lives even through the fall of the roman empire because I think about it constantly
I know not everyone has the luxury of time like I do (even though I should be doing homework) but if you’re looking for a way to get involved in your community, the local library is always a good place to start. I do a little pro bono work with my school and we start a lot of our work with recommendations from local library sources.
I’m also a “couponer” ever since my husband lost his job and during Covid I stocked up and now when I get a lot of stuff for free, I start there and with my local shelters. It’s not much and I know it’s a privilege to have it to give, but I’m serious about making shit better one person at a time.
If you need some ideas, or some hope- hell even just a good book.
We still have the library.
I had a whole post written out, but it was angry and ugly and I decided to just take a play out of Li'l Wayne's playbook for a bit and move in silence like the "g" in lasagna.
It's hard for me to understand all this hysteria right now, because I'm not at all afraid.
I'm not afraid because I understand that the system is rigged and broken, and there really is no one side or the other, so it just honestly doesn't matter. People get really angry at you when you say this, but if you do the work, you know that's exactly true.
Meet me in the middle, says the unjust man, is the theme of the Democratic party.
I also watched this country pay for a genocide, and watched people that I respect say absolutely nothing about it. Never even acknowledged it was happening. That was much scarier to me than Trump being president, if I'm honest.
Also. Let's be really real. Why should I be scared?
I'm a middle-aged perimenopausal white woman who is financially secure, successful, debt-free, and in a heterosexual relationship with a highly decorated military veteran. It doesn't matter who is president, because I'm going to be fine. No legislation will be passed that affects me in even a slightly negative way.
There will be laws and policies placed that affect others, though, that is certain. But why would I be afraid because of that?
How is fear a useful emotion to have at this time, when I am a white woman, with quite literally the most privilege of any class in the world? I can hide behind white men and how "evil" they are and directly still benefit from the white supremacy and colonialism that is embedded in our society. I can even get white men to protect and shield me while I constantly vilify them.
Now that's power.
So no, fear is not an emotion that I can afford to have at this time, when it is up to me to have these hard conversations with my fellow white women now. When it is up to me to do the work now.
I can't negotiate with SallyAnn, who voted for Trump because he's hilarious or because woke or because groceries. But I have to try to negotiate with Rachel, who thinks she's a morally superior being and everyone else must be evil or selfish or a lower creature to not have voted for Harris.
How are we going to win with that mentality? I sincerely mean that. If more than half of this country voted for Donald Trump, and nonvoters are the worst people alive who deserve to be punished, what does that leave you to work with? What conversations can you have to move this country in the right direction if you block every single person who doesn't agree with you?
It is my responsibility as a white woman to hold other white women accountable. We are too powerful in this society- no one else is "allowed" to challenge us. Only now, through video, are we seeing the "Karen" effect of white supremacy manifested through (often upper middle class) white women.
In fact, there are women on this very site who I know are messy at the customer service desk. I see you. You think I don't know, but I do.
But imagine the times before, when we didn't lose. When we were never questioned. When our fear and our safety were put above all other things. We love to hide behind feeling "unsafe." Unsafe in a gated community? Unsafe in an HOA?
Unsafe where, Jessica? Where are you not safe?
Liberal bullying has shouted down every single other conversation in the room for so, so long and people are really just not trying to hear it anymore. To be fair, I'm really not trying to hear it anymore. We've been listening to the speeches and the cruelty and the ultimatums and the arrogance for so many years and it's time for it to end.
As you can see, it is not effective.
We white women constantly insert ourselves into the conversation, we make scenarios about us and our feelings, we desperately try to get approval from Black women and force them into terribly uncomfortable situations (often by being racist trying to beg apologies or show how "good" we are), we refuse to do our own work to see our role and our guilt, we expect to be babied and educated, and when we don't get our way, we cry. We cry until we win.
This can be a new starting point for all of us, where we stop being the victim and we start being the support beam. We want to talk all day about how good we are- we need to show how good we are.
Our work is not proving to people of color that we're "good" and "safe," it's to SHUT THE FUCK UP. Like, really. That's our job right now. It is about being the safe space that so many white women seem to be desperately seeking.
You do not understand. It is our job to keep people safe, in a really fucking real way now. It doesn't matter if you're scared or you're not equipped or you don't know what to do.
When someone is not safe, as a white woman, your job is to create safety around them. No one talks crazy to anyone around me. I do not allow racism. I correct anti-trans conversations. I call out sexism. I work hard in my daily conversations and behaviors to show I am a person that can be trusted and that will protect those around me.
What else?
Read, listen, learn. Follow content creators of color. Read books by people of color, especially women, especially immigrants. Donate your money to grassroots organizations run by people of color. They're all over social media- you don't have to look far. But you do have to look. You do have to do the work. You cannot always wait for someone to tell you what to do next.
Most importantly? Talk to other white women. You know, I am sad that this is costing me followers left and right, that half your notes are blank from so many white people blocking me, but I can't stop.
We have to do better.
There's still time.
All of this. I don’t have followers here anymore, but boy are the white women I do talk to, angry at my feedback.
