✞ 666 ✞

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YOU ARE THE REASON
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@la-sofferenza
✞ 666 ✞
Takuboku Ishikawa, tr. by Tamae K. Prindle, from The Selected Poems; “A Love Song to Myself,”
Takuboku Ishikawa, tr. by Tamae K. Prindle, from The Selected Poems; “A Love Song to Myself,”
There is only dark, time and silence. Sleep, you have dreamed, sleep eternally.
Jules Laforgue, tr. by William Jay Smith, “Funeral March for the Death of the Earth,” (via violentwavesofemotion)
“You’re not fat, you’re perfect. Why do you need to lose weight?”
Glad you asked. Here is why I need to lose weight:
So I can have an actual jaw line instead of a double chin
So I can feel comfortable eating in public without fear of being judged
So I don’t have to constantly pull my shirt off of my stomach in fear of my fat being too obvious
To not be the fat friend anymore
To be one of those skinny bitches everyone is jealous of
To get the smallest size in a store and just know it will fit
To look good in everything I wear because I am skinny
So my future boyfriend/husband can pick me up
To look good and feel comfortable being naked
To surprise my family and friends with how good I look
To be told “You’re beautiful” instead of “You’re so nice”
To finally be able to rock a bikini and to wear shorts without having to anxiously tug them down over my thighs
To have cold hands when everyone else is sweating
These are just a few of the reasons why I need to be skinny.
The Good Girl’s Guide
🌷Daily Routines
Go to bed no later than 1am and wake up no later than 9am (weekdays)
Stretch in the morning
Weigh yourself immediately after your first pee.
Make bed properly, open curtains and a window.
Keep uni room pristine and tidy, including doing laundry, polishing and cleaning your bathroom.
Go to every class, study well and get outstanding work completed before deadline.
Try to include a 30 minute run in the morning or walk at least 20 minutes everyday.
At least 2 litres of water; coffee and tea count.
Read before you sleep.
🌷Hygiene
Brush teeth twice daily.
Shower every other day at least, but definitely after any strenuous workout.
Wash face every morning and night, always take off makeup.
Apply moisturiser everywhere to keep your skin supple and soft.
Always apply deodorant and a signature perfume/scent.
🌷Appearance
Keep your nails filed and clean, or freshly painted.
Use hair oils, a good shampoo and conditioner and make effort into doing your hair, even if just straightening/curling.
Dress appropriately, but be careful of baggy clothing making you look bigger than you are.
At a minimum, apply concealer, mascara, brow product and highlight everyday.
🌷Etiquette
Never speak loudly or over someone, be polite and wait.
Keep your elbows off the table when you do eat.
Keep your mouth clothed when you eat and never speak with a full mouth.
Sit up straight and maintain a good posture.
Smile brightly, even at people whom you may dislike.
Never badmouth, belittle or doubt anybody, even yourself.
Don’t talk about weight or food with anybody.
Reply to messages within good time, call parents often.
Don’t mindlessly scroll on your phone; find something to do.
🌷Food
Keep calorie limit to 500 on weekdays, 800 on weekends.
Fast for at least 3 days (72 hours) every week = 4 fasts per month.
When hungry, chew sugar free gum and have a hot drink.
Never eat when you are the only one. (If others have stopped - stop too).
Eat between 9am-6pm, never before, never after. Effective of a 15 hour fast each day.
If possible, keep any binge food or triggers out of reach, or, if you live alone (university student here), don’t buy any trigger food. Out of sight, out of mind.
Follow a completely plant based diet.
A glass of water before any meal and a glass of water after.
Consume mostly protein, fruit and veg and minimal carbs.
Don’t eat anything you don’t know the calories of.
🌷Fasting
At least 3 days.
Weigh yourself every morning.
Do not exercise aside from general everyday movements - your body is weaker and you could faint or collapse. (Yes, exercising on an empty stomach is good for ketosis (your body’s state of metabolizing fat at a high rate) but when you are fasting your body will naturally do this to give you energy from your fat stores instead of it receiving energy from food).
Drink a hell of a lot of water, tea and coffee.
Use Tumblr a lot and keep distracted.
Slowly reintroduce food when your fast is over.
These are rules and guidelines I set myself, and are what work for me. They may not necessarily work for you or fit your routine.
Stay safe 💜x
fasting
1-6 hours: body burns glycogen
6-72 hours: body burns fat
72+ hours: body burns protiens ( body starts burning muscle, tissue, etc )
1-2 weeks: may die from lack of minerals or heart failure
3 weeks- 70 days: death
( this all may vary depending on weight and activities )
This one is for the boys.
For all the boys who think they weigh too much, for all the boys who try their hardest to reach their goal weight, for all the boys that still have a long way to go. It’s for all of them who reached their goal weight and who are in recovery right now, and for all the guys who have a huge struggle trying to recover.
For all the boys who are told their eating disorder isn’t real, who think they aren’t valid, for all the guys who are told they should ‘just eat and get over it’. For everyone who ever got told that their depression isn’t real and they are just making shit up for attention.
It’s also for all the boys, whether they are trans or cis, who look in the mirror and see things that ‘shouldn’t be there’; stretch marks, scars, feminine features.
For all the boys that never get enough support, because an ED is seen as something only girls can suffer from: YOU ARE VALID, YOU ARE REAL AND YOU’RE FUCKING WORTH IT.
👏hating 👏men 👏makes 👏you👏 sexist 👏too
enjoy your food
some thinspo
eating cleaner will clear up your skin drastically and give it a brighter, more radiant look - cut out added sugar!
hipbones are considered to be inherently feminine and therefore really attractive
your body deserves the best so stop putting junk and crap inside it, nourish it instead
your face will look more defined
use the time you’d spend binging to study instead or do something productive that will actually benefit you
think about your long term health, not just being skinny - you want to live a long, healthy life so work for it
it’s easier to shop for clothes and clothes will look better at a smaller size, even the most casual outfits
those with conservative parents - it’s easier to look modest when you have less fat on you
Yeah it hurts
It hurts to starve for days straight, to pretend everything is normal, to always count the calories and feel like you’re going to pass out everytime you stand up.
But you know what hurts even more?
It hurts to hear people whisper “has she gotten fatter?” It hurts to eat to the point where you hate your own existence, it hurts to feel every single ounce of fat oozing from your body and being a lonely fat nobody.
Would you rather your stomach hurt for the night or your soul hurt for the rest of your life?
Choose your pain wisely
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