Ash Knight

Flowers bloom from what is left behind. And sometimes those flowers want to punch you in the mouth until you cry.

[ladyashknight]

heiresstoflame

“Right,” she agreed reflexively. She’d had a few run-ins with the locals, none of whom seemed particularly fond of her, but neither had they been outright malevolent. But this womer seemed to know them better than she. “Complete shite.”

Daggerfall, though, that was interesting. “I never got to see much of High Rock,” she confessed. “Met a few knights over the years though. Is it really like they say? The duels and all that?”

“Yeah,” Icona nodded. She could talk about knights. They’d practically raised her, after all. “Duels, tourneys. War. Lot of patrolling, too, though. Takes ages to get a full suit of armor on and off, depending on how heavy they’re going. An hour in the tent getting strapped in for ten minutes, maybe, of a joust.” Icona wasn’t sure what to say, so she rambled. 

[ladyashknight]

heiresstoflame

“Not for some time,” she replied, releasing the womer’s hand and hoping she hadn’t clutched too tight. This next part was easy at least, she didn’t have to make anything up. “I lived in the West for a long time, in the Alik’r. I’m slowly making my way east, but you can only travel so fast on a treasure-hunter’s resources.”

She laughed cheerily. “Not that I mind, of course. I’m in no hurry to be anywhere. Spend long enough cooped up in one place and wandering doesn’t seem so bad.”

Oh, maybe that’s why she was so friendly? Icona relaxed a fraction. “I’m from, erm, I mean, I lived in the West for some time, too. Daggerfall. With some knights.” Maybe that was saying too much. She couldn’t say ‘Daggerfall’ without an accent, no matter how hard she tried.

“I heard most of Morrowind’s not fit for living right now, anyway. A lot of ash.” She regretted the phrasing immediately. She should ‘know,’ not have heard. “...Erm, anyway, that’s why we’re all in Skyrim, right? Nords are shit but you can breathe, here.”

[ladyashknight]

heiresstoflame

“Of course,” Zel agreed with almost automatic promptitude, nodding her head with what she thought was a very knowing countenance. Yams did sound good. She’d eaten bugs before, too, plump beetle larvae pan fried and dribbling with juices. Did the Dunmer prepare the same sorts of dishes? Perhaps she could pull this off convincingly after all. “Much better than this.”

Oh, she hadn’t shared her name, had she? That was rude, and this womer was proving to be exceptionally helpful. She’d been getting odd looks ever since she came to Skyrim. She was used to odd looks, but something about the apprehension in the eyes of certain locals made every friendly conversation that much more appreciated.

“I’m Zel, by the way,” she grinned, putting a gloved hand forward.

Apart from Neht, and perhaps even moreso than Neht, this was the friendliest Dunmer Icona had ever met. She couldn’t be from Morrowind, then. Where was she from? It was going to drive Icona crazy. She didn’t know how to act.

“Ah, I’m...Icona.” She took the proferred hand and gave it a firm shake, a quick mental reminder not to let her apprehension wilt her grip. “Have you been east, um, recently, then?”

[ladyashknight]

heiresstoflame

This was going to take some getting used to. All these sweets, she’d had sweet fruits out west, and a few odd cakes here and there. It had taken her over a year to get used to the spices that Redguards cooked with. Now she had to re-adjust to this? Hopefully once she reached the homeland of the Dunmer their cuisine wouldn’t be too… unusual.

Perhaps she should ask this one.

“Nothing like the food back in Morrowind, huh?” She tried her best to sound like she knew exactly what she was talking about.

Icona’s cheeks colored in frantic embarrassment as she scrambled to find an appropriate answer. She’d not worked her way that far east yet. She was an Outlander. This womer (she had to be at least part Dunmer, Icona was certain, but the other part...Altmer? Who knew. It was rude to try and sort it out, and probably ruder to ask) at least hadn’t recognized her as an Outlander, but now Icona was in a quandary. Should she pretend she knew what she was talking about first hand?

Somehow Dunmer could always catch out the liars. Especially Outlanders. But she could try and hedge the truth a bit. “Morrowind’s all bugs, bitter, and ash yams.” As soon as she said it, catchy as it sounded with partial alliteration, Icona balked. It didn’t sound complimentary, did it? “That is, you know, obviously...better...”

[ladyashknight]

heiresstoflame

“Huh?” The stranger’s tone was enough to take her by surprise. Had she said something wrong? And damn, to a Dark Elf. She was supposed to know how to be a Dark Elf. “I wasn’t–”

Shit. She didn’t know what to do, here. Should she agree? That seemed like a bad idea, given the predominantly Nordic crowd. Well, maybe if she felt like starting a bar fight. Maybe she could try to learn how Dunmer were supposed to act in Skyrim by talking to this one. “Yeah… Uh… What’re you having?”

“What am I drinking?” Icona glanced down into the mug she was nursing, as if to check if there was any left. “...Just the cheap shi--uh, the cheap stuff.” Maybe she shouldn’t start chatting up a handsome lady with curses.

Maybe she shouldn’t have admitted her budget only allowed for watered-down ale, either. Better to move the conversation to another topic before she kept making a fool of herself. “Are you new to Skyrim? You’re going to find half the food here has honey in it.”

[heiresstoflame-blog]

“What’s in this– What do they call it? This mead stuff, anyway? I never tasted anything like it in Hammerfell. Too sweet.” The womer wrinkled her nose, before taking another drink. Despite her apparent apprehensions, black waves of hair bounced back as she threw her head into the swig.

“Nords like the sweet stuff, then? Like uh… Bears, or something, huh? That why they carry them around on their shields?”

[ladyashknight]

Her question was greeted by an undignified snort. Icona, ever eager to jump into someone else’s conversation, was also just as happy to talk shit about Nords. “Maybe if you’re trying to be poetic.”

Possibly it wasn’t the best idea to be entirely caustic when meeting a new person, especially a lady who looked like she could bench-press Icona with one arm. Even if, maybe, she’d like to see that. “It’s fermented honey. Sometimes other stuff, but, basically, you’re drinking honey.” She had ale, herself, because it was cheap and she expected them to water her drinks down, anyway.

[ladyashknight]

notyourlark

“Oh, but of course it is! Don’t you see?” She laughed again, again, until she thought her chest might burst from it. Fear of spontaneous explosion was the only thing capable of finally reeling her back in.

“Goodness, you’re delightful. Has anyone told you that? Well, you are.”

Icona’s arms came up, ready to steady the woman if she fell. It would not look well if some rough-edged Dunmer caused a noblewoman to collapse in the street, even if it was with mirth. But her hands hovered there, useless, as Narcisse managed to calm down and compose herself.

“I...n-not in those words, no.” Icona floundered, suddenly caught by how pretty and intense her eyes were. Oh, gods. “Are you, um, are you alright?”

[ladyashknight]

notyourlark

“That’s–” Narcisse’s eyes shot open with surprise. A hand shot up, too late to cover her mouth as an almost childlike giggle streamed from her lips.

She couldn’t stop.

Icona looked on helplessly. “I...didn’t think it was that funny...”

[ladyashknight]

notyourlark

She frowned for a moment, but just a moment. No, she would not lose the thread of the conversation again.”Not at all,” she needed to slow down, perhaps. “Only that if we examined all things with the same scrutiny towards our own perceptions that we afford death, we might uncover many of the deeper meanings of the Aurbis. Mundane things, like the sound of the wind. You know?”

Icona thought she got it, but it felt like ooze on her mind, hard to grapple with. “Isn’t that the point of having academics and philosophers? To pick and pull these things to...er, well, death.”

[ladyashknight]

notyourlark

“Ah, we certainly could examine this from just such an angle!” Finally, her acquaintance was beginning to sustain the thread of the dialogue. “What is death, really, but a test of our perceptions? We’ve no way to understand the departing of the spirit, and even so we try so desperately to explain something beyond our own comprehension. Why? For fear, naturally, we must be reassured that we know all that there is to know. There can be no uncertainties, especially not when they are inevitable. Well, mostly inevitable.”

And here, her voice, reaching its trill crescendo, suddenly descended into a low dirge. “But what if it were not fear that motivated us to question our ability to perceive, but legitimate curiosity. No hubris, no pride, only the true desire for knowledge, and the courage to accept the hideous truth.”

“Are you suggesting people should fling themselves off buildings to find out if they die or not?” Icona asked, trying again to follow the woman’s thread of thought as it rapidly unwound.

[ladyashknight]

ram-shield

“I don’t want you t’pay me!”  Briet panicked.  “That’s not what I meant!  I don’t want money.  Or anything.  I just– Wanted to make sure you were alright.  They can be asses, right?”  She scratched the back of her neck and let her gaze slide away for a moment, before she chanced a glance back at her face.

“And a lot of us take it out on elves when we shouldn’t. So… I just…”  She trailed off.  “Wanted to make sure y’knew that you didn’t have to put up with it.  Not here.   I don’t like people being bullied.  So I’ll help you if I can.  That’s what I’m here for.”

Icona glared at her for some time, debating. Part of her wanted to keep running, and the other part wanted to believe her. The part of her that had been raised by knights and wanted her to be chivalrous and just was winning, and she frowned, straightened, and grumbled out a “...well, thank you, then.”

[ladyashknight]

notyourlark

“Either that,” she smirked, “or he has ascended our perceptions entirely. And wouldn’t that be interesting? But how shall we ever know?”

“Couldn’t you describe death like that, anyway?” Icona pointed out, uneasy. “As far as we know, death’s just...going somewhere else.”

[ladyashknight]

ram-shield

“My name’s Briet,”  She clumsily interjects just as the Dunmer questions her.  Briet bites her bottom lip, embarrassed, and then glances around to ensure that there’s no one around to see this.  She looks the Dunmer woman straight in the eye.

“A good one,”  She insists.  “Just not– You know, one who thinks every rule needs to be followed all the time.  For good reasons, though, only. Anarchy.”  She laughs, and then quickly quiets herself. “This isn’t fair,”  She complains after a moment.  “I’m flustered.  I don’t know how to talk when I’m– Flustered.”

“You’re flustered? You chased me halfway out of Whiterun just to tell me I could hit people.” Icona wasn’t sure of her next step, either. Everything was so far removed from Daggerfall, from her life with the knights, from even the caravans. She didn’t like when rules changed too fast. She wanted to know what to expect, and this was very much not expected.

“I don’t have anything to bribe you with.” Icona hedged. Maybe that was it. She was a new blood in the guard, heard people handed out coin to keep themselves out of jail. Icona had a few septims, but certainly not enough.

[ladyashknight]

ram-shield

“I don’t know!”  She complained after a long pause fell between them.  Briet hated uncomfortable silences.  “I don’t know!  Because–”  She mumbled to herself, and felt a hot rush rising up her neck, and filling her face.  “I just don’t want to see you in trouble,”  She mutters, barely audible.  “That’s all.  He was bothering you.  And I have to try to go with the law, yeah?  But if someone tries to talk shit to you again, you can hit them. And just let me know.  I’ll hit ‘em, too.”

What was she on about? “You’re telling me, I can hit people. And you’ll hit them, too?” If this was a trap, it was a weird one. What was she thinking? “Look, I don’t follow. What kind of guard are you, even?”

[ladyashknight]

notyourlark

“Ah, but that is where I must disagree with you, darling.” She smiled that same eerily infectious smile, gliding closer as if to share some imparted truth. “How can we know unless we’ve tried? How can we be sure that what we ‘sane’ folk think we see is actually real at all? Suppose a madman believes he can fly, and leaps from the city walls. Will he fly or fall, do you think? How can we be sure that we do not simply see him fall because it is what our mortal minds expect him to do?”

“And he’s dead because we expect him to be? Mass-delusion governs everything?” Icona felt like this was some sort of trick.

[ladyashknight]

notyourlark

“Exactly, darling!” Narcisse practically beamed with pride. “Or rather, logic as we know it would cease to exist. We’d be subject to an entirely different set of rules, depending on just how mad we chose to drive ourselves. I think we could use some new rules, anyway, don’t you?”

“Just, well, just being mad doesn’t change the rules, though.” Icona still felt unsure about this argument. Was she really having it? Was this a discussion, instead? “You’re, you know, still subject to reality, even if you’re mad. You just might not see it as it is.”

[ladyashknight]

ram-shield

“Well–!”  She began before she could stop herself, voice clipped.  Realization came later;  Why should this woman trust her?  She shut her mouth with an audible click of her teeth, and crossed her arms across her chest.  Stubbornly, she muttered out a quiet:  “No.”

Icona’s confusion muddled over her apprehension and anger. Backing up from the Nord, she stalled, waiting for her wind to come back. “Then what do you want?”