Warnings: angst, breakup, alcohol, mentions of nsfw
Word Count: 3257
Summary: The night of Kirishima’s birthday party you run into your former boyfriend. Perfect time for closure right? But that’s only if he’s over you.
A/N: Heyo! All characters are over the age of eighteen. Minors do not interact please. Thank you for reading and feel free to shoot me an ask! Requests open unless otherwise stated!
-xoxo Bambi
Six months, two days, eight hours, forty two minutes and thirty four seconds. That’s how long it’d been since you’d seen him. In all that time the pain never went away, almost like a slow death, an arsenic of love that was slowly poisoning you, you couldn’t get a grasp on life. Not alone. Not like this.
Maybe it was a little co-dependent. You’d been together since your second year at UA high. You survived high school and made it into the top ten pro heroes, him always in the top two and you trailing behind, but never minding it, because you admired his drive, his need to be number one.
So when did all that love turn to resentment. Late nights, waiting by the phone, only to wake up in a cold empty bed yet again. Suspicions and jealousy began to wreck havoc. You couldn’t trust him with his younger, more beautiful in your opinion, sidekicks. And unbeknownst to you, the friendship you’d garnered with Kirishima was making him boil in rage, that left him shaking and breathless every time he saw his best friend.It became too much. You wipe your eyes, pulling your bag closer to your chest as you make your way towards the back of the grocery store.
“I can’t do this with you anymore Katsuki-”
“You knew what you signed up for when we started dating. My goal has never changed. You agreed to stay by my side no matter what. Now that things are getting harder you want to leave?” You shake your head, arms cradling yourself as you try to mend your broken heart to keep it from shattering completely.
“What happened to us Katsuki?” you brush your hair out of your face. He looks as beautiful as ever. Sweatpants hung low on his hips, his lean muscular body resting against the counter, one hand gripping the edge so tightly you could see the veins in his hands flex as he changed his grip. Blonde hair disheveled but never hiding those vibrant red orbs that always seemed to stare through you, but now all they seemed to do was stare at you with accusation. With betrayal. “We were going to get married, have a family-”
“I meant it in the moment.” he says, his voice flat, no emotion behind it. But you can see the bags under his eyes and the way his shoulders sag slightly, curving his spine to hunch, something so unfamiliar and surprising for him. “I did want to marry you-I do-but….” he trails off licking his lips.
I have to be number one.
He doesn’t say it. But the words hang in the air between the two of you, refusing to dissipate and settling over you like an icy touch.
He’s snapped out of his thoughts when he hears the sound of your keys jingling. He looks up, catching your eye as you slip your coat on and tuck your feet into your shoes by the door.
“Where are you going?” he asks quietly, almost like a little boy filled with fear. You can see the struggle on his face. The back and forth battle in his mind, between wanting to be the greatest hero of all time and wanting to love you. You couldn’t let this go on. All it was doing was causing pain for the both of you.
“I believe in you Katsuki.” you open the door, gripping the knob as you keep your back to him and step out the door. “You can be number one. But…..I just know I can’t be your number two anymore.” before he could say another word you shut the door. Katsuki slammed his fist on the counter, cursing quietly as he let the tears fall.
“Y/N?” you jump at the sound of your name being called, turning from the milk you were looking at to buy, you smile into the familiar face of Izuku Midoriya. The two of you were never really close in school, but you adored his wife Ochacco and the two of you had been good friends for years.
“Izuku!” you throw your arms around him, hugging him tightly, he’s gotten stronger, his entire body seeming to cover you as he crushed you to his chest.
“It’s so good to see you,” Izuku chirps. “How have you been?”
“I’m okay.” it was a lie, and he knew it as well as you did. After the breakup with Katsuki, he got pretty nasty. Sides were chosen, lines drawn and you were left in the dust. You had never wanted to be a pro hero, opting instead for general studies and using your quirk to support heroes, mainly your former boyfriend. But once you broke up, in his pain, it seemed Katsuki lashed out, blacklisting you from your friends. Not that you really wanted to talk to them anyway. Anytime you were around them it was a reminder of the love you lost and you were trying to live. You wanted a normal life. A normal relationship. Where your partner comes home at five, you have dinner, watch movies, snuggle, make love till the morning and do it all again the next day. You didnt want the danger, the unknown.
But the little part of yourself you buried deep down knew you wanted the danger. The unknown. But only if it came from him.
“That’s good.” Izuku feigned a kind smile. “I’m glad to know you’re doing well.” he reached out, placing a hand on your shoulder, “If you ever want to talk please give us a call. Ochacco misses you dearly.” You smile, placing your hand over his and giving a gentle squeeze.
“I will…..But I’ve got to finish getting these groceries for dinner tonight.” You go to turn away when Izuku’s grip on your shoulder tightens.
“Oh! If you don’t have plans tonight, why not come to Eijiro’s birthday party!” you grimaced internally, suddenly feeling like a bucket of cold water had been dumped over your whole body. You’d forgotten about the manliest hero's birthday.
“Oh….um….I’d love to but-”
“If you’re worried about Kachan,” Izuku’s voice is lower and filled with assurance as he threads his arm through yours, leading you towards the front of the store and away from your cart. “He won’t bother you. Not if you stay near me and Ochacco. She really misses you, you know. You kind of left her high and dry.” You chewed on your lip thoughtfully. You did feel guilty for just kind of ghosting everyone, not just Ochacco. It wasn’t fair of you to punish your friends and it wasn’t fair of Katsuki to force them to choose. Someone was gonna have to be the adult.
“I missed her too.” you squeeze his arm gently. Izuku ruffles your hair, smiling brightly as he leads you to his car.
“Hey Katsuki! You almost ready?” Bakugou groaned as he fixed his tie. More than anything he wanted to stay in tonight but it was Shitty Hair’s birthday and Yuri would have never let him stay in.
He met Yuri two weeks after the breakup with you. He wasn’t sure how it all happened but one minute he was drinking tequila with the gang, next minute he was waking up in some girl’s bed, with her face pushed against his chest.
And he knows its shitty. He knows it makes him a scumbag in fact. That he keeps her around because he doesn’t want to be alone. No matter how many times the words leave his lips towards her, he never gets that feeling of confidence or assurance of his words. Not like when he used to say them to you. She doesn’t sparkle the same, she doesn’t shine. But if he drinks enough alcohol and closes his eyes, he can almost picture you there with him.
“You look gorgeous babe.” he’s gotten so good at pretending to smile, the quick quirk of his lips has her leaning over to kiss him as he grabs his jacket and they head out the door.
Maybe this was exactly what you had needed. After you had gotten back to Izuku’s house, Ochacco met you outside, tackling you and crying tears of happiness as she expressed her joy at seeing you. Izuku laughed and watched on as you seemed to blossom a little bit before his eyes. He had been keeping an eye on you, for Ochacco and his own fears of your depression. He wasn’t close to you, but his wife loved you and that meant he loved you too. And actually seeing you laugh for the first time in months made him feel more like a hero than being voted number one ever could have.
By the time you arrive at the party, its already in full swing, people milling about outside the pro hero’s house, music blasting from inside. Izuku opens the door for you and for Ochacco, offering each arm to you two as you make your way towards the front door. Izuku feels you squeeze his bicep and leans over, whispering softly in your ear.
“You’re going to be fine. I won’t let him start anything. If he tries I’ll finish it.” You glance at Ochacco who offers you a warm smile as Izuku opens the front door to the house and lets the two of you walk in first.
“Katsu I wanna dance.” Yuri whined, tugging on his arm. Bakugou rolled his eyes, glaring at Denki and Sero, who were snickering at him from across the room. Yuri was a nice girl, but she was a nightmare when she drank. ANd it didn’t matter how many discussions they had about it. She never did what she said she was gonna do. And as much as it pissed him off, the alternative of being alone, was not something he wanted.
Having Yuri meant not having to accept responsibility for the pain and hurt he caused. Having her meant he could pretend the feelings he still carried for you, were really for her and some days he almost tricked himself into believing he loved her. Then something would remind him of you and the dream would end.
“In a little bit baby,” he kissed her head and wrapped his arm around her waist. She giggled, nuzzling against him further.
“Hey Katsu?” Bakugou grunted, wondering what else she could possibly want at this moment. “Who’s that girl with Ochacco and Deku?” Katsuki’s eyes snapped open as he followed her line of sight towards the green haired boy. His mouth went dry, his arm falling from Yuri’s waist.
“Y/N! It’s you!” Eijiro swept you up into his arms, hugging you tightly. You grin, pressing your face into his shoulder. You had been close, but when everything fell apart, you weren't angry or upset that he stood by Bakugou. “I’ve missed you.” he whispers, cupping your face in his hands and pressing his forehead to yours.
“Like I could miss your birthday?” you tease. Kirishima rolls his eyes, letting you go.
“I’m glad you’re here. And I promise. Good night. No drama or bullshit. If you see Bakugou just ignore him.”
“Like he makes that easy.” Kirishima rubbed the back of his head, chuckling nervously.
“Please. Restrain yourself for me will ya?”
‘Of course.” You wave as he’s pulled through the crowd. Izuku leans over you and Ochacco.
“I’m gonna get us some drinks!” He shouts over the music. You both nod and as he leaves Ochacco grabs your arm.
“Come dance Y/N!”
Bakugou couldn’t believe he was really seeing you. Here in the flesh.
You looked good. Your outfit accentuating your body perfectly, showing off all of your best assets. Your hair, your eyes, you looked like an absolute daydream. Like a cloud he wanted to get lost in. He bet you were still so soft and pliant-
“Katsu?” Katsuki snapped his head to the side, looking down at Yuri. She’s staring at him curiously. Bakugou cleared his throat, chugging the rest of his beer.
“She’s nobody. Let’s dance yeah?”
Somehow in the hype and fun of dancing, Izuku managed to snag away Ochacco and you ended up dancing with Shoto. The two of you were never close in school, you don’t even remember speaking to him at any point, and yet his arms were wrapped around your waist, chin rested on your shoulder as you pressed your backside against him. He whispered in your ear, flirty pick up lines, crude jokes, the alcohol in your veins confusing the feeling in your stomach, were you drunk or high off the feeling of being this close to a man again.
Shoto turned you in his arms, his hands resting just above your ass as he pressed you close to him.
“How is it I never saw you in school?” he whispers, brushing your hair out of your face. You smirk, tilting your head up so your nose brushes against his.
“I wasn’t in the flashy hero business. My niche is behind the scenes.” He nodded, pressing his forehead to yours.
“The strong right arm,” he says, dragging his hand up your arm slowly as he speaks. You shiver, arousal pooling in your belly and seeping between your legs.
Something in him snapped. Maybe it was the way she tilted her head or the fact that he touched her so intimately.
He had tried to distract himself by dancing with Yuri. But the moment he saw her it was like he had to keep his eyes on her. He had to follow her through the room, it was the only way he could be close to her now, because he knew he didn’t have the right to try and even speak to her. He knew he didn't have the right to look at her or even bask in her beauty. And yet it was taking everything in him not to rush IcyHot and kill him for touching her.
Because she was Bakugou’s.
She’d always been his.
He was a fucking idiot. God he was so stupid.
“Katsu?” Yuri tugged on his arm. Bakugou had stopped dancing abruptly, standing with his hands in fists, eyebrows knit and teeth bared like he was ready to tear out throats. “Are you okay?” He looked down at Yuri, guilt washing over him, sobering him all the way up. He ran his hand down his face and shook his head, stepping away from her. “Katsu-” she reached for him.
“I’ll be back.” he turned, shoulders hunched and head down, hands in his pockets as he heads towards the backdoor.
Your body felt hot, Shoto’s breath leaving perspiration on your neck. It was too hot. Too much too soon. You reach up, pushing back on his chest. “I just need some air. I’ll find you in a bit.” Shoto gives you a concerned look, but doesn’t stop you as you walk around him, heels clacking on the ground as you make your way out back.
“Oh….I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were out here.” Bakugou turns sharply. He had come outside to get some air and figure out what to do. He wiped his face as he heard the backdoor open again, trying to hide the stray tears he couldn't keep contained. When he heard your voice it was like lightning striking him, his body going rigid as he whipped around.
You stood on the steps, glowing in the porch light like some ethereal fairy, something not of this world. He opened his mouth, but closed it again. After all this time, there wasn’t anything he could say to make this right again.
Your first instinct is to run to him. To throw your arms around him and wipe his face. Anyone else may not have seen it, but you had spent most of your life with this man. You could see the unshed tears in his eyes, the way his jaw flexed, he wanted to speak but was fighting. You felt tears come to your own eyes as you looked at him, shirt untucked, tie loosened. He looked like a disgruntled child, it was cute, but also heartbreaking.
“Don’t….” Bakugou’s voice is almost a whisper as he speaks quickly. You had turned, planning to go back inside, but the pleading word stopped you. Your heart yearning to run to him, trying to force your brain to make your feet move. “Don’t go….”
“Bakugou-”
“Katsuki….You call me Katsuki.” his voice was gentle, soft, like he was talking to an injured animal. You wrap your arms around yourself as you face him once more. He takes a cautious step forward and when you don’t move away he takes another step forward. You shake your head, a sad smile on your face.
“No…Not anymore-” he reaches out once he’s in front of you, threading his fingers through your hair. You sigh, hating how you slightly lean into it. He sees it too, and it makes him a little bolder.
“I really fucked up.” he says softly, though he’s speaking more to himself as he continues to gently touch you, as if he’s committing you to memory, the feel of you, the sight of you, cuz he knows this is the only time he gets with you and when you’re done that’s all he gets. “I should have never let you walk out that door Y/N.” you take a step back, you’re feeling dizzy from his touch, from the arousal in your veins, from the memories of being wrapped up and drowning in him. It’s over. Why was he being so cruel.
“Bakugou-”
“Please Y/N let me-” You rip away from him, stumbling back towards the door. You glare up at Bakugou, tears falling down your cheeks in anguish and betrayal, pain, hurt.
“Why are you so cruel?! What did I do to deserve this? I only wanted what was best for you Bakugou! I devoted myself to you! I tried to be everything. It wasn’t enough. I wasn’t-” Bakugou silences you. He grabs your arms, yanking you to his chest as he wraps his arms around you. He holds you to him, you can hear his sobs, muffled in the top of your head, his shoulders shaking.
“You’re my goal.” your eyes widen in confusion. You try to pull back but he just holds you tighter to him. “My goal….It isn’t to be the number one hero in the world anymore. It’s to be the number one hero in your life.” You’re speechless as he pulls back and rests his head on your shoulder. “The worst decision I ever made was putting you second. Fuck, I hate this shit, but that should let you know I mean it. I was a dick. I tried to fill the void you left. But another person, another mission…another beer…none of it was satisfying. Just you. I just want you….please….” You reach up, pressing your fingers to his cheek as you lean forward and kiss him softly. He jumps into it eagerly, grabbing your face and quickly taking control as he kissed you deeply, like you were oxygen and he needed a breath. Once you finally pull away you peck his lips, taking a step back towards the door as tears fill your eyes.
“I’m sorry Katsuki….I can’t let you destroy your dream and give up everything you built for me. You can still be the number one hero. I still believe in you.”
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