Desi didn’t come home that night. Or the next morning. Logically, I knew she was fine. She was with Josh. They were celebrating. They were young adults now. But emotionally? I was one unanswered text away from filing a missing person's report. Sophia and I had just finished cleaning the kitchen after lunch when we heard the front door open. The relief hit first. Then the irritation immediately after. Desi had never been a difficult kid. Never rebellious. Never sneaky. But this one issue kept resurfacing throughout her teen years: communication. I didn’t need details. I didn’t want details. A simple “don’t wait up” would’ve saved me from mentally planning a rescue mission at six in the morning. The second she walked fully into the kitchen, though, all the irritation dissolved. She was fine. More than fine, actually. She looked … different. Not physically. There was just something in her posture now. A confidence. A certainty. Like some invisible line had been crossed overnight and she knew it. And unfortunately, I knew exactly what it was. Watcher, help me.
Josh hovered awkwardly behind her looking like a man who already sensed danger. Smart kid. I pulled her into a hug anyway.
“You scared me,” I muttered.
“Sorry,” she said, though not convincingly.
We settled around the kitchen island, and I tried figuring out how to ask about her night without actually asking about her night. Turns out I didn’t need to.
Every single thought left my body. Gone. Just … completely evacuated the premises. I stared at her so long that her expression slowly shifted from excitement to caution.
"Aren't you going to say something?" she asked carefully.
I blinked once. "What do you mean you got married?"
She rolled her eyes. Being married changed absolutely nothing, apparently.
"We eloped," she said as if that clarified everything.
I heard Sophia inhale beside me.
“Congratulations, sweetie,” she said carefully. Too carefully. “We’ll talk later, okay?”
That tiny pause gave me just enough time to keep myself from reacting badly, but just barely. The thing was—I wanted to be happy. I meant everything I said the night before. I supported her. Them. But somewhere in my mind, I still thought there’d be more time. Time to plan and adjust. I looked forward to walking her down an aisle someday while pretending not to cry in front of everyone, and now that moment didn’t even exist anymore.
"You did this without us?" I asked quietly.
That finally made her soften a little.
“Look,” she said, “I get why you’re upset. But this felt right for us.”
Us. Not me. Not him. Us. And somehow that made it hit even harder.
“Did you think about us at all?” I asked before I could stop myself.
“Of course I did.” Her voice tightened slightly. “But this wasn’t about you.”
And the worst part? She wasn’t wrong. I wanted to tell her that one day she’d understand why this hurt so much. I wanted to explain that loving your child feels like walking around with your entire heart outside your body all the time. But I already knew explaining wouldn’t change anything. Desi never defends her feelings. She decides what feels right and moves. One day, I’d probably look back on this moment differently. But right now? I really needed to hit something.
