♥

[yoursminehourss]

honestly i think im good without that thanks

[kirikomamura]

[fucko]

[garaks-padded-cell]

I have an absolutely massive russian guy as my driving instructor rn

Whenever i get into his car i have to spend an embarrassing 3 minutes adjusting everything back into clown car proportions so i can fit. Anyways a couple lessons ago he had me do the same route over and over to practice and there was a dead seagull in the middle of the road at one point and to keep correct positioning on the road i was required to drive over its carcass like 19 times just goring this seagull until the 20th lap when my instructor looked at the seagull that now more resembled tomato soup than a bird and said "this time. you spare seagull" and so i did and then he said "incorrect positioning on road"

[garaks-padded-cell]

Artists rendition

[garaks-padded-cell]

I forgot that when i told @peach-crem this over the phone they drew it as worf LMAO

[itsybitsyjoltik]

we can’t keep letting him get away with this

[kira-kui-n]

"get him pregnant" well thats not my thing but to each their own

"get her pregnant" *takes up my sword and shield* i wont let you do that to her. ......................

[zapatism]

lol ur watching the world cup finals sorry im too busy HAVING SEX

(texting my dick guy) we gotta have sex rn i just blogged

(dick guy) im watching the world cup

[handsomeboymodelingschool]

[worlds-largest-juice-container]

My new two sentence horror

"Hello, my name is fred"

unfortunately the rest of his name was d. fazbear

[qqchurch]

[eebie]

i named them cruelty of the heart and sickness of the mind

[chiarrara]

why was messi lowkey serving saddam hussein hiding spot

[kinuko]

[loveridden1999]

if i was a soccer player i'd simply kick that ball in the goal instead of wasting everyone's time

[undying-princess]

they're executing the count from sesame street for violating the masquerade

[joshlovesyou]

[cryptotheism]

The funniest thing you can add to any piece of media is a boy detective. Breaking Bad needed a 13 year old child who goes around looking for clues to the caper and whatnot.

[aflo]

Hank