I'm a bitch, don't deny it

Icon by: lgbtqiconic| Header by: I can't remember who I got it from| Agender | They/Them | 15 | Homosexual | Panromantic | Polysexual | Polyamorus | Multushipper | Trans Safe Space | If you're an anti or don't know how to respect other ships, fuck off. You're not welcome on my page. | If you ever need to talk, don't be afraid to message me. I promise that whatever we may talk about will never be given out to others. It will never leave our conversation. | I suffer from Anxiety, Depression And ADHD |

[lancemcclaincocaine]

HI I'M MOVING ACCOUNTS

@fuck-your-fandoms

@sammie-cant-draw

[tibets]

[babyanimalgifs]

[thisusedtoberum-deactivated2017]

So there’s a chick in my class I like; unfrotunately im quiet, calculated and intelligent and she likes big dumb jocks. So anyway one day me and her boyfriend are walking among a group of our felow students when a gang banger appears and threatens with a gun. Her ‘big and though’ boyfriend instantly freezes and loses the ability to speak. I on the other hand squint my eyes and step forward pulling my katana for judo practise out in one fell swoop. “Go ahead” I say. The gun is only 400 years old while the sword is the child of many millenia. Do you fancy the odds?“ Instantly the gang-banger drops his weapon and runs. My other classmates cheer while her jock boyfriend pretends the whole thing was funny. She looks at me and sees what she didnt see before. She thanks me with a kiss, but I don’t smile because I was only doing my duty. Safe to say she saw who a real man was that day. I may be quiet and collected, but raise a weapon against me and youll face your worst nightmare

[synqra]

The gun is only 400 years old while the sword is the child of many millenia. Do you fancy the odds?

[tittyblaster8000]

reblog if ur a real ice eater

[tittyblaster8000]

keep rebloggin fake ice eaters r gettin mad

[officialwhitegirls]

reblog to raid the sun at midnight while its sleeping and distracted to steal its heat for the winter

[powerpuffles]

The sun is an object… It doesn’t sleep…

[officialwhitegirls]

excuse me. i have a quadruple phd in orb study and what you have is disrespect, i know what im talking about 

[honeybottledrip]

i….don’t know anyone named todd in real life. like ive never actually met a todd. where are they

[honeybottledrip]

new cryptid of 2016: todd

[lancemcclaincocaine]

I know a Todd. He cuts my grass.

[cosmosketch-deactivated20170218]

I feel like TheBootyDiaries is that one pretty friend who is really funny and at the same time will come up to your window at 3 am asking if you want some noodles.

[thebootydiaries]

i am always lurking in the bushes with a ramen noodle

[lancemcclaincocaine]

A single ramen noodle?

[angryfirefly]

jdksknns they love each other

i sincerely hope this hasn’t been done before but this is based of that one scene from Brooklyn 99

[clacomics-deactivated20191030]

So because you kept requesting practically everyone, I had a little fun sketching the characters like models. I picked random photos from pinterest as reference.

OH! Uhm… Sorry I don’t have that much time… I have other things to do.

Yeeah and that’s why I don’t have time now…!

I TOLD you! I can’t! No time! HAVE TO GOOOOOO

BYEEEEEEEE

[sunblisters-archive]

boots with the fur (with the fur)

[rainbowbowie]

Be More Chill looks great

[snuffysbox]

how about y’all stop doing shit like this 

[lancemcclaincocaine]

So, as usual...

I was in the hospital and stayed over night. Now, I'm out and I was going to take a shower. When I got into my bathroom, I stood there for a solid millisecond before falling into my door then proceeded to almost fall into my bathtub.

[curego-deactivated20190720]

who is more of an LGBT+ icon?

LIKE: Ariana Grande (appropriates, cishet) REBLOG: Hatsune Miku (goddess, wlw)

[toastpotent-deactivated20250619]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[lorem64]

I’m so confused why he would think cookie dough would give him salmonella??? What parent told him this. There’s no chicken in there!

[ankaa-avarshina]

Two words: Raw eggs.

[lorem64]

?? What kind of world do you live in where Raw eggs carry salmonella or are in anyway unsafe

[ankaa-avarshina]

Don’t ask me, ask them Americans. I’m an Asian just passing the word on

[phantoms-lair]

*deep breath* Though the risk is small, raw eggs can carry samonella.

MORE THREATENINGLY Raw wheat can carry E. Coli. However, if you don’t mind making your own cookie dough, you can easily make it safely.

Take your standard recipe. Omit the eggs. Eggs serve as a binding agent to hold the cookie together. Since we’re eating the dough raw, that’s not needed. Take the flour, put it in a pan and bake it at 350 for 7 minutes. Any E. Coli is now dead.

Just mix the rest of the ingredients together as the recipe is called for and BAM, perfectly safe edible cookie dough.

[crayyola-deactivated20220827]

Thank u so fucking much for this wisdom

[antique-scarecrow]

wait you’re telling my i can get E, Coli just FROM EATING FLOUR straight from the bag???

[kingantlion-deactivated20231130]

Why..why are you eating flour straight from the bag?

[antique-scarecrow]

its good

[mini-kkukkungie]

i saw this picture and i thought what if!!! instead of a mom thing, your ot3+ could use it as a wedding ring!!! each person in the polyamory has their own color gem!!! the inside of the ring says ‘love forever’ or 'we are a constellation’ or 'together we are better’!!! something cute!!! idk i just really liked the idea of this ring being a more romantic kind of thing for people who have more than one partner!!!