LOVEMETHESAME.

[laudiis]

@mxilinh​. “there’s a new zombie movie coming out... no one else in duchess wants to watch it, so i was wondering if you’d like to, seohyung? w-with me? o-only if you’re free, of course!”

[laudiis]

@dulcetvitae​. “all these interviewers ask the same goddamn questions—what does it matter how close we are? jesus christ, i’m going to actually puke the next time you say we’re ‘best friends’ on television.”

[laudiis]

@naviyera​. “we’ve run into each other too many times now for this to be a coincidence. i think that’s fate trying to tell us something, don’t ya’ think?”

[laudiis]

eunjung.

(...)

“it’s not exactly a lie, i want the wedding and courtship to be over, it’s a bit tiring don’t you think?” she admits, he’s checking his watch again, he must be tired. she couldn’t blame him. there was nothing she wanted to do than take off her shoes and lay in her bed for the night. “ But yes, it’s not hard, there’s worst people to be engaged to.” eunjung doesn’t want to admit how her stomach tightened when he smirked.

hm. maybe she could do something about it. a memory of her pretending to be ill to get out of tea parties as a child comes to mind.

“ah, your highness, i fear i’m feeling a bit faint, “ she mutters, lowering her voice as she leaned her weight against the man’s shoulder, “ perhaps the room is too overbearing for me.” maybe this will allow them to leave the ballroom at least for some time.

a scoff, a free hand lifting to massage the back of his neck. a tilt of his head, a jab of his tongue against inner cheek—being a prince is exhausting, what boorish words for him to say. “it’s hilarious, really. they’ve been planning for us to be married all this time—why wait twenty-five years to finally announce it?”

a click of his tongue at the thought before a chuckle loosens his jaw, draws his eyes to her frame. it’s some kind of solace, he thinks, that she feels the same; he’s not exactly sure how he’d navigate the situation if she didn’t (if he had to pretend to return the love of someone so painstakingly so).

he feels the weight of her being against him, enough so that he’s on the cusp of snapping at her before he realizes her plan—a pleased grin, as he obliges to follow, arm moving to wrap itself around her shoulders as some aid of support. sejong guides them the the closest door—”my fiancee’s feeling a bit under the weather. we’ll return soon.”—and past a pair of guards before the darkness of the hallway greets them. ah, he can finally breath.

and like clockwork, as soon as they’re out of sight, he’s swift to separate himself from her, sighing in relief as he stretches with shoulders back and chest forward. “father and mother are probably too busy gloating to the other nobles about the engagement to notice that we’re gone, so that’ll give us about.. twenty minutes? give or take.”

[laudiis]

dongjin.

(...)

his heart ached as he watched the way she dampened when the prince and princess entered the room. 

he wanted her to smile.

dongjin would be lying if his heart didn’t skip a beat when jayeong grabbed his hand. feeling much more like a silly schoolboy than the general he was.  he knows he’s just a convenience for her, but he didn’t mind. 

he tilted his head at her question. did they love each other? that didn’t matter. what did matter was did jayeong love me? 

dongjin already knew that answer. so he crossed his arms, and leaned his head against the wall, unsure what to say to his wife. he knew for a fact sejong’s and the princess’ courtship wasn’t a fairytale, it was more like a group project? 

“jayeong..” he sighed, “ do you want to dance? or we can go home, you seem..” he trails off, unsure what to say next.” you seem under the weather, and I would hate for you to stay here long enough where you get sick.”

again, with that consideration—sometimes, it makes her want to throw up, but sometimes (times like tonight), it reminds her of her place. so she turns to him and sighs, as a sort of silent apology, before shaking her head. “no, it’s okay. i’m fine. thank you for worrying, though.” 

she offers him a soft smile—the smallest amount of (fake) happiness she can offer at the moment—as the sounds of flutes and violins echo within the vast ballroom. ah, they must be finished now.

glancing over her shoulder to take note of the crowding dance floor, she tilts her head, eyes gazing up at him through fluttered eyelashes. “i’d love to dance.” her hand finds his for a second time, and within moments, their once-seclusion is replaced with the multiple presences of other nobles around them—all twirling in tune, stepping in pitch. 

“are you going to be coming home tonight or..” her voice trails off, neck too sore from staring up at him that her eyes naturally fall to the floor. her semi-question is out of curiosity, probably, but she wouldn’t be surprised if she’s to be escorting herself back to their manor tonight.

“i—it’s no trouble if you aren’t! i’m just wondering.. i have to attend to the princess in the early morning, anyways.”

[laudiis]

eunjung.

(...)

as they approach the king, eunjung quickly bowed, only lifting up her head when sejong finished introducing her. “ thank you for the wonderful party, i feel undeserving of it, it’s lovely, thank you, your majesty.”

she knew she was just a walking womb to the king and queen. eunjung was only a child when she met the queen, and she could tell by the older woman’s gaze she was already sizing up if she would bear healthy children.

“i feel most joyful this evening,” eunjung commented, brushing a strand of her hair behind her ear,” i am counting the days before the wedding and i can finally be a wife.”

her own words caused a pang in her stomach. she didn’t just want to be a wife. but they didn’t need to know that.

it’s weird to think that sejong has more a professional relationship with his parents rather than a personal one—the king’s been adamant on maintaining his distance, and the queen’s always quick to pass him off to nannies whenever possible. it’s only when he’s come of age—able to fight on a battlefield and bring home spoils of war—that they start to recognize him not as the crown prince, the heir to the kingdom, but as their son.

and quite honestly, it’s makes him kind of sick.

so as they offer their condolences, all sejong can do in response is politely smile and nod (slyly rolls his eyes at eunjung’s remark about being a wife) before they’re finally dismissed, left to mingle with waves of nobles who offer their frankness and flattery alike. it’s already so tiresome.

when he spies an opening to break away, he’s quick to take it and, naturally, drags his fiancee along with him. “they’re vultures, i swear. they compliment us to our faces, but watch them: i bet they’re probably planning a coup behind our backs as we speak.”

he tugs at his collar (it’s tighter than usual—suffocating, to say the least) as he adjusts his cufflinks. eyes gloss over the time presented on his watch once again, and he has to hold in the umpteenth sigh of the night. “nice one back there. you must’ve been an actress in a previous life. hell, if i didn’t know any better, you would’ve even fooled me.” a smirk. “but i guess it’s not that hard to pretend like you’re in love with a prince though, is it?”

[laudiis]

dongjin.

(...)

dongjin, the so-called fearful lone wolf the country was a coward. he knew that his wife didn’t love him, yet he still went forward with the engagement when he had the power to end it. maybe there was a part of him that hoped, that prayed that jayeong would one day return feelings he had for her.

he cleared his throat, bending down to whisper in her ear, “ jayeong, be careful your skin is almost green with envy, we don’t want people talking.”

dongjin sighed at her words, “ they have to be if they were any less than perfect than the public would rip them to shreds. i don’t envy any of them.”

lies, he wished he could light up jayeong’s eyes like prince sejong did by just walking into a room but he would never admit that out loud.

it’s hard not to feel guilty when he’s this sweet—and honestly, in the purest essence, dongjin truly is a nice guy. his reputation on the battlefield aside, he’s treated her with so much consideration, an amount she can’t even begin to return. maybe it’s selfishness, or maybe it’s discomfort—especially when she falls asleep alone at night, wakes up to an empty bedside.

she could consider it a blessing, really, that her husband (she’s not yet used to calling him such) is absent from home so much. silence by herself is more easing than silence when together; she sends him letters when she can, but they’re void of emotion and altogether substance.

in fact, the party tonight is the first time in a while that they’ve graced each other’s company, so when he leans down—whispers in her ear ever so softly—she nearly jumps before remembering where she is and who exactly with. she doesn’t respond, just gulps, heavily, and when the royal couple inches closer, jayeong reaches for dongjin’s hand—more out of necessity than anything, really—to shuffle them out of the way.

she doesn’t want to be in earshot when prince sejong finally says those words. my fiancee.

a quick beeline to the closest wall, she sighs when they’re out of sigh and (for now) out of mind. her hand drops from his, arms now crossing across her chest as her shoulders droop in unconscious sadness. “do you think they love each other?”

a foolish question, jayeong.

“i wonder what their courtship was like,” she adds, swift too barely give him enough time to answer her question. “they’ve been betrothed for so long. it’s like out of a fairytale, honestly.”

[laudiis]

eunjung.

“ah, forgive me, i guess i’m just overwhelmed by your kingly aura,” eunjung wants to throw up. but her mother always told her to stroke a man’s ego. forget cooking him dinner, tell him he’s smart and his heart will open eventually.

(...) she had to play the role of a blushing bride to be, someone head over heels for the man beside her.

and while it seemed sejong cared little for her, she hopes he was a good actor. it would be disappointing if he wasn’t.

taking his arm, she gazes up at the prince with warm eyes. “ of course, your highness, why wouldn’t i smile? this is a day i’ve been looking forward to since we were kids.” she said, her voice a bit louder than usual, hoping that the nobles around them would overhear.

as they walk into the party, eunjung does her best to ignore the envious glares from the other young women in the party. she knew that sejong was popular, and many women were disappointed but their engagement had been known for some time now. she had hoped they would have died down by now.

“big smiles huh? i think many of these women would rather see me in tears,” she whispers to the man beside her.

her words cause a chuckle to escape from him—he’s impressed. maybe he should give her more of the benefit of the doubt; eunjung’s not a foolish woman, he knows, so maybe he’ll give her a few points for that: her wit, her cleverness.

their relationship has always confused him—he’s known they’re to be married since childhood, and tonight’s just a mere formality to finally make it official. maybe it’s this knowledge that pushes him towards such indifference—it’s not denial, but it’s not acceptance either. maybe he’s projecting, seeking out his frustrations against such unfairness: that every aspect of his life, even his wife, is chosen for him until he bears the weight of a crown on his head.

the old man should just die already—but you didn’t hear that from him.

“don’t bother with them. i’m just glad that i can properly show you off to the public now,” he reassures, the second half of his statement as his turn to broadcast to their audience of their seemingly perfect relationship. he gazes down at her in feigned adoration, tugging her closer as their steps glide them closing to his majesty in the center.

“your majesty,” he greets, a deep bow in front of the man who normal people would call ‘dad’. “if you would, allow me the honor to introduce you to my fiancee: duchess hak eunjung.”

[laudiis]

@mxilinh​. she’s surely going to hell—in fact, there must be a special place in the underworld for people like her, for people who pine after those who aren’t their significant others. 

jayeong watches them, the prince and the duchess—ah, the princess now—from her lowly spot on the ballroom floor, beside a man she should call her own but can’t bear to even begin to think so. instead, she watches with scornful yet envious eyes, claps along with others and hopes her dreariness doesn’t stand out.

she should be grateful; her appointment as the princess’ lady-in-waiting has skyrocketed her reputation far past the one of being a modest count’s daughter—an arranged marriage of her own to an esteemed general of the military, her family (and her future) is set for life.. so why isn’t she happy?

maybe it’s karma, for desiring something (or rather, someone) so far out of her own reach. prince sejong, just his name causes a whirl of butterflies in her stomach. how pitiful, for she’s sure he doesn’t even know hers.

“don’t they look lovely?” empty words spoken from an even emptier heart—she feels like she’s lost him, even though she knows he wasn’t even hers to begin with. “everyone’s already calling them the couple of the century. how fitting, don’t you think?”

[laudiis]

eunjung.

(...)

as she walked towards sejong, she frowned. the medal on his uniform was a bit crooked, she would have to ensure the maids paid better attention when she moved into the palace.

eunjung nodded her head, “of course, your majesty, i wouldn’t dare.” ah, threatening her already? she assumed that wouldn’t happen until after the wedding at least.

“ your majesty,” she called, the doors were about to open, she had to do this quick so it would work. her pale fingers quickly brush over his chest, readjusting the medal. “ we can’t have you looking out of sorts,” she muttered as she quickly retreated her hand as the doors opened.

he checks his watch for the second, third, fourth time—foot anxiously tapping against marble tiles as he frustratingly sighs. what’s taking them so long?—don’t they know he has a kingdom to run? 

this is why he’s never quite cared much for parties: exceedingly boring and far too useless. his time’s better spent in the castle, holed away in his office and focused on the growing mountains of paperwork father’s passed onto him with every year inching closer to succession. part of him’s thankful for the lack of siblings for his line to the throne is a rather straightforward one, but it’s nights like these—nights where he wishes he could split himself into two—where he longs for a counterpart to deal with these more.. frivolous responsibilities.

too consumed in his thoughts, he doesn’t even pay half a mind to eunjung as she beckons closer, only notices when her hand’s on his chest and his eyebrows are furrowing in suspicion. he scoffs, “it’s ‘your highness’, lady eunjung,” he corrects through gritted teeth. “i’m not king yet.”

the threatening creep of doors opening catches his attention, straightening his back and lowering his jaw. almost as if by instinct, he offers his arm out for her to hold. “don’t forget to smile—they’re all suckers for a good smile.” an overdramatic chime of trumpets call in their entrance, and he starts, one foot after the other, as they’re greeted with a flurry of lights and applause. it’s going to be a long night.

[laudiis]

@mxilinh​. he shouldn’t be so hostile, really—she’s his future wife after all. it’s something about the way she holds herself: how her not caring for him makes him care for her even less. it’s unexpected pettiness, for he’s long known his birth has led to this—seldom does one bear the title of a prince and also hold the power of choice at the same time.

father—ahem, his majesty always nags that he should treat her with kindness (a happy wife is a happy life, or so he says), but sejong would rather bother himself with less—for even on a good day, he can barely remember her name. so he just stands there, behind emboldened double doors, adjusting his uniform and (impatiently) waiting for the guards to finally announce their entrance.

“try not to embarrass me,” he snides, eyes glancing to his side briefly as he sighs, begrudgingly stepping closer to her as time ticks on. “if you ruin my reign before i even get crowned, i swear, i’ll have your head.”

[hyunjins]

current mood: not okay

[femaleidols]

ICY

[wooyoungs]

[laudiis]

mxilinh·:

@laudiis·

“heera!” seohyung called out, spotting the girl in the hallways, he hasn’t seen his friend since the dating rumors came out, and he was starting to worry. “ heera, hey, i haven’t seen you in a few days, you haven’t replied to my messages about getting some food, have you been busy?” he questioned, as he caught up to her, his brows furrowed. 

since the publishing of the dating rumors, seohyung was the last person heera wanted to see---out of embarrassment, probably, but mostly out of fear that this had ruined any slight of chance of them being together. so when she spotted him in the company building, her immediate instinct was to turn back around and walk the other way ... of course he just happened to spot her first, though. “u---uh,” she stammers. “y---yeah. i’ve been busy. we’ve been busy---duchess! that is. super busy.”

[donhyuck]

happy boys receiving a well-earned commendation

[laudiis]

mxilinh·:

“ every single one? there has to be at least one, just date her enough until dispatch gets the hint.” eunji frowns, scrunching her nose at her cousin’s words, “ kiyoung oppa, you gotta eat. is somethin’ wrong with the side dishes? if you’re jobless what else can you be doing if not eating?” the girl’s a bit peeved, “ i can’t eat these, they’re too heavy for the diet i’m on,” 

“this is just a telltale sign that you’re a rookie, eunji. spend enough time in this industry like i have, and you’ll figure out that no female celebrity is worth tolerating.” he huffs, head leaning back in frustration. “there’s nothing wrong with them. i just don’t eat as much as y’all do. blame it on lack of physical activity or whatever.” he shrugs. “why do you need to diet? you’re, like, the tiniest person i know.”