excuses

I found the flower, the light I saw once I'm on a night flight to somewhere Even if there's no tomorrow, I run jas.a private mumu blog. pst

[mxilinh]

naviyera‌:

         ❛ you’re forgetting something so important though… money can’t buy happiness. ❜ byeol did not restart the show on netflix from season one, episode one to be joking like this. ❛ what are you talking about, seo ?! i wouldn’t be surprised if you were aang. you’re the main character here. ❜

“you could survive in the world of avatar, but i think a flying bison would accidentally step on me. i can’t stand the fear,” seo muttered, with a rather sad expression. “haha byeol, should i shave my head? how mad do you think the company would be?”

[mxilinh]

dulcetvitae‌:

@mxilinh​

“emi, let’s take a break.” yohan announced through the speaker-box of the recording room, signaling that the take they had just recorded was finished. taking a deep breath, the producer waited for the idol to exit the recording booth, feeling not completely satisfied with the recordings so far. as soon as emi returned to the lobby, yohan turned to look at her curiously. “hey, is there something bothering you today?”

she knew the sound of his voice. yohan was going to complain about something again. and emi can feel his and her own frustrations growing as the takes piled up.  a sigh left the duchess member’s lips as she sat on the arm of the couch in the studio. “ i didn’t sleep that well last night, i think that must be the reason.” she purses her lips, she should just bite the bullet right now. “ what do i need to improve on? come on, let’s get straight to the point.”

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

@mxilinh​. “there’s a new zombie movie coming out… no one else in duchess wants to watch it, so i was wondering if you’d like to, seohyung? w-with me? o-only if you’re free, of course!”

seohyung’s kinda afraid of zombies. but he won’t tell the duchess member that. “ a zombie movie? yeah, that’s so cool.” he was gonna have nightmares for weeks, how lame. “ i’m totally down! it’d be fun. i’ve been craving popcorn!” seohyung said with a forced smile, he hopes heera can’t tell. 

[mxilinh]

naviyera‌:

         ❛ what kind of question is that ? superpowers of any sort are priceless, dude. i would pick avatar in a heartbeat. ❜ she sips at her milk tea, gathering the boba balls in one cheek like a chipmunk before speaking again. ❛ what kind of bender do you think you’d be ? i’ve always wanted to be a firebender because it’s badass. ❜

“ well, with a million dollars, you could make your own set that’s exactly like avatar but it’d have running water,” he explains with a curt nod. this was serious business, it’s not like he had more important things to do than drink some milk tea with byeol in some empty practice room. “ i dunno, i feel like it would probably be the cabbage man. i’m not bending material.” he laughs, “ yeah, you’re badass enough to be a firebender,  just don’t go azula on me.”

[mxilinh]

@naviyera​

“okay hear me out byeol, would you rather be stuck in the world of avatar the last airbender or! “ the duke member pauses, whipping the chocolate from side of his mouth. “ get a million dollars. what’s it gonna be ?”

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

a scoff, a free hand lifting to massage the back of his neck. a tilt of his head, a jab of his tongue against inner cheek—being a prince is exhausting, what boorish words for him to say. “it’s hilarious, really. they’ve been planning for us to be married all this time—why wait twenty-five years to finally announce it?”

a click of his tongue at the thought before a chuckle loosens his jaw, draws his eyes to her frame. it’s some kind of solace, he thinks, that she feels the same; he’s not exactly sure how he’d navigate the situation if she didn’t (if he had to pretend to return the love of someone so painstakingly so).

he feels the weight of her being against him, enough so that he’s on the cusp of snapping at her before he realizes her plan—a pleased grin, as he obliges to follow, arm moving to wrap itself around her shoulders as some aid of support. sejong guides them the the closest door—”my fiancee’s feeling a bit under the weather. we’ll return soon.”—and past a pair of guards before the darkness of the hallway greets them. ah, he can finally breath.

and like clockwork, as soon as they’re out of sight, he’s swift to separate himself from her, sighing in relief as he stretches with shoulders back and chest forward. “father and mother are probably too busy gloating to the other nobles about the engagement to notice that we’re gone, so that’ll give us about.. twenty minutes? give or take.”

“ i think your parents and my own just want to watch the rest of the nobles to fight for the position to marry their daughters off of you,” eunjung said bluntly, her eyes scanning the room to find various other noble ladies, ( even some who she used to see as friends ) watching her with resentful eyes.  please, most of those women couldn’t bear the burden that came with becoming the queen.

it’s not all fancy silk dresses and sparkling jewels. eunjung had read of past queens in their country, and how some found themselves in the claws of death because they didn’t bear a son or weren’t to the king’s fancy anymore.  

he’s warmer than eunjung would have thought.  maybe it was the way sejong held himself but, she assumed he would be a bit colder like a reptile.  but of course, he was human after all, with blood running through his veins, it should be expected.  

 it’s slightly disappointing when the prince moves away, there goes her human heater, the silk of her dress was too thin, and the room had felt freezing. but it’s all worth it when they are alone, there’s no daggers being glared through her back, or parents eyeing her every mood.

“they’ll probably want us to leave early anyway, too much exposure would make us boring to the public,” she sighs, this was her future, after all, every move planned by the king and queen. and when they die, every step restricted by advisors.  

eunjung glances at her future husband, she knew so little about him. what were his likes and dislikes? did he read for fun? was he afraid of the dark as a child, was he ever in love with someone?

 “want to play 20 questions, i hear all the common folk play it to get to one another,” she’s heard of her maids whispering about outings with the guards, on how fun it was. so different from the restrictive balls she went to. “it wouldn’t hurt to learn more about one another.”

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

again, with that consideration—sometimes, it makes her want to throw up, but sometimes (times like tonight), it reminds her of her place. so she turns to him and sighs, as a sort of silent apology, before shaking her head. “no, it’s okay. i’m fine. thank you for worrying, though.” 

she offers him a soft smile—the smallest amount of (fake) happiness she can offer at the moment—as the sounds of flutes and violins echo within the vast ballroom. ah, they must be finished now.

glancing over her shoulder to take note of the crowding dance floor, she tilts her head, eyes gazing up at him through fluttered eyelashes. “i’d love to dance.” her hand finds his for a second time, and within moments, their once-seclusion is replaced with the multiple presences of other nobles around them—all twirling in tune, stepping in pitch. 

“are you going to be coming home tonight or..” her voice trails off, neck too sore from staring up at him that her eyes naturally fall to the floor. her semi-question is out of curiosity, probably, but she wouldn’t be surprised if she’s to be escorting herself back to their manor tonight.

“i—it’s no trouble if you aren’t! i’m just wondering.. i have to attend to the princess in the early morning, anyways.”

“I’m your husband, why wouldn’t i worry?” those words are hollow, he hardly spent enough time with her to be really called a husband. dongjin’s parents only pushed the wedding to ensure he had a wife and would be better promoted in the ranks.

no one trusted a single man to lead an army.

they were already pushing for a grandson. his older sister had already been married off for years now, and unfortunately, she had given birth to two baby girls.

he hadn’t told jayeong that though, she hardly wanted to be in the same room as him, much less give birth to his children. he wasn’t prince sejeong.

dongjin hated dancing, he was a bit too flatfooted for it, a bit too stubborn to flow as he should. but for jayeong, he would. he knew how bad it would seem if she didn’t come to these events without her husband, bad gossip would follow her like a stench.

“ah.” her question caused dongjin to pause for a second before resuming to follow the beat of the music, “ yes, i’ll be returning home for the evening, i’ll most likely be home throughout the winter.”

he peered down at her, he wondered if she would be pleased, that he’d be home for a prolonged amount of time. perhaps jayeong found him suffocating to be around.

“unless they call me back to the front, but the rebels to the west have been quiet for the time being.”

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

it’s weird to think that sejong has more a professional relationship with his parents rather than a personal one—the king’s been adamant on maintaining his distance, and the queen’s always quick to pass him off to nannies whenever possible. it’s only when he’s come of age—able to fight on a battlefield and bring home spoils of war—that they start to recognize him not as the crown prince, the heir to the kingdom, but as their son.

and quite honestly, it’s makes him kind of sick.

so as they offer their condolences, all sejong can do in response is politely smile and nod (slyly rolls his eyes at eunjung’s remark about being a wife) before they’re finally dismissed, left to mingle with waves of nobles who offer their frankness and flattery alike. it’s already so tiresome.

when he spies an opening to break away, he’s quick to take it and, naturally, drags his fiancee along with him. “they’re vultures, i swear. they compliment us to our faces, but watch them: i bet they’re probably planning a coup behind our backs as we speak.”

he tugs at his collar (it’s tighter than usual—suffocating, to say the least) as he adjusts his cufflinks. eyes gloss over the time presented on his watch once again, and he has to hold in the umpteenth sigh of the night. “nice one back there. you must’ve been an actress in a previous life. hell, if i didn’t know any better, you would’ve even fooled me.” a smirk. “but i guess it’s not that hard to pretend like you’re in love with a prince though, is it?”

eunjung thought she was prepared.

but even the endless lessons couldn’t have prepared her how suffocating the air was in front of the king and queen. how heavy it was, yes sejong was a bit hard to be around but his parents were on a different level altogether.

eunjung’s jaw was starting to hurt because of the smile she painted on.

It was exhausting to continuously have to lower herself in conversation.  To lower herself, to wait till the nobles wanted her to talk, but not to talk too much, or don’t say anything too smart. it was exhausting

so when her fiance quickly found a way to break away, she couldn’t help but feel thankful. perhaps they’ll bond over their misery together. isn’t that how most royal marriages went?

“it’s not exactly a lie, i want the wedding and courtship to be over, it’s a bit tiring don’t you think?” she admits, he’s checking his watch again, he must be tired. she couldn’t blame him. there was nothing she wanted to do than take off her shoes and lay in her bed for the night. “ But yes, it’s not hard, there’s worst people to be engaged to.” eunjung doesn’t want to admit how her stomach tightened when he smirked.

hm. maybe she could do something about it. a memory of her pretending to be ill to get out of tea parties as a child comes to mind.

“ah, your highness, i fear i’m feeling a bit faint, “ she mutters, lowering her voice as she leaned her weight against the man’s shoulder, “ perhaps the room is too overbearing for me.” maybe this will allow them to leave the ballroom at least for some time.

[setsmaker]

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

it’s hard not to feel guilty when he’s this sweet—and honestly, in the purest essence, dongjin truly is a nice guy. his reputation on the battlefield aside, he’s treated her with so much consideration, an amount she can’t even begin to return. maybe it’s selfishness, or maybe it’s discomfort—especially when she falls asleep alone at night, wakes up to an empty bedside.

she could consider it a blessing, really, that her husband (she’s not yet used to calling him such) is absent from home so much. silence by herself is more easing than silence when together; she sends him letters when she can, but they’re void of emotion and altogether substance.

in fact, the party tonight is the first time in a while that they’ve graced each other’s company, so when he leans down—whispers in her ear ever so softly—she nearly jumps before remembering where she is and who exactly with. she doesn’t respond, just gulps, heavily, and when the royal couple inches closer, jayeong reaches for dongjin’s hand—more out of necessity than anything, really—to shuffle them out of the way.

she doesn’t want to be in earshot when prince sejong finally says those words. my fiancee.

a quick beeline to the closest wall, she sighs when they’re out of sigh and (for now) out of mind. her hand drops from his, arms now crossing across her chest as her shoulders droop in unconscious sadness. “do you think they love each other?”

a foolish question, jaeyong.

“i wonder what their courtship was like,” she adds, swift too barely give him enough time to answer her question. “they’ve been betrothed for so long. it’s like out of a fairytale, honestly.”

 he hated seeing jayeong like this. she always seemed to be stuck under a cloud of arrow whenever they went to events at the palace. he should have canceled the engagement when he had the chance. maybe she could have found love elsewhere, but the fact that dongjin’s career had him stationed either away or working within the palace, she was forced to see the one she pinned for more of than she must have liked. 

his heart ached as he watched the way she dampened when the prince and princess entered the room. 

he wanted her to smile. 

dongjin would be lying if his heart didn’t skip a beat when jayeong grabbed his hand. feeling much more like a silly schoolboy than the general he was.  he knows he’s just a convenience for her, but he didn’t mind. 

he tilted his head at her question. did they love each other? that didn’t matter. what did matter was did jayeong love me? 

dongjin already knew that answer. so he crossed his arms, and leaned his head against the wall, unsure what to say to his wife. he knew for a fact sejong’s and the princes’ courtship wasn’t a fairytale, it was more like a group project? 

“jayeong..” he sighed, “ do you want to dance? or we can go home, you seem..” he trails off, unsure what to say next.” you seem under the weather, and I would hate for you to stay here long enough where you get sick.”

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

her words cause a chuckle to escape from him—he’s impressed. maybe he should give her more of the benefit of the doubt; eunjung’s not a foolish woman, he knows, so maybe he’ll give her a few points for that: her wit, her cleverness.

their relationship has always confused him—he’s known they’re to be married since childhood, and tonight’s just a mere formality to finally make it official. maybe it’s this knowledge that pushes him towards such indifference—it’s not denial, but it’s not acceptance either. maybe he’s projecting, seeking out his frustrations against such unfairness: that every aspect of his life, even his wife, is chosen for him until he bears the weight of a crown on his head.

the old man should just die already—but you didn’t hear that from him.

“don’t bother with them. i’m just glad that i can properly show you off to the public now,” he reassures, the second half of his statement as his turn to broadcast to their audience of their seemingly perfect relationship. he gazes down at her in feigned adoration, tugging her closer as their steps glide them closing to his majesty in the center.

“your majesty,” he greets, a deep bow in front of the man who normal people would call ‘dad’. “if you would, allow me the honor to introduce you to my fiancee: duchess hak eunjung.”

eunjung didn’t know that the prince could laugh. maybe it was because they were only allowed to see each other with escorts present. she knew that was suffocating, to be watched 24/7, she couldn’t imagine the burden that he carried daily.

she wished they had a chance to laugh together before they married. who was sejong beneath his public facade? hopefully not as uptight, but then again perhaps he thought the same thing about her.

as the couple walked towards the current king and queen, eunjung could spot her parents beside them. her father, the ever serious scholar, looked proud for once, she had been a disappointment for most of her life, she should have been a boy, intelligence was wasted oner her, what could she do besides be married off.

but as always, her father found a way to succeed, he had somehow arranged an marriage to the crown prince for his family disappointment.

as they approach the king, eunjung quickly bowed, only lifting up her head when sejong finished introducing her. “ thank you for the wonderful party, i feel undeserving of it, it’s lovely, thank you, your majesty.”

she knew she was just a walking womb to the king and queen. eunjung was only a child when she met the queen, and she could tell by the older woman’s gaze she was already sizing up if she would bear healthy children.

“i feel most joyful this evening,” eunjung commented, brushing a strand of her hair behind her ear,” i am counting the days before the wedding and i can finally be a wife.”

her own words caused a pang in her stomach. she didn’t just want to be a wife. but they didn’t need to know that.

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

@mxilinh​. she’s surely going to hell—in fact, there must be a special place in the underworld for people like her, for people who pine after those who aren’t their significant others. 

jayeong watches them, the prince and the duchess—ah, the princess now—from her lowly spot on the ballroom floor, beside a man she should call her own but can’t bear to even begin to think so. instead, she watches with scornful yet envious eyes, claps along with others and hopes her dreariness doesn’t stand out.

she should be grateful; her appointment as the princess’ lady-in-waiting has skyrocketed her reputation far past the one of being a modest count’s daughter—an arranged marriage of her own to an esteemed general of the military, her family (and her future) is set for life.. so why isn’t she happy?

maybe it’s karma, for desiring something (or rather, someone) so far out of her own reach. prince sejong, just his name causes a whirl of butterflies in her stomach. how pitiful, for she’s sure he doesn’t even know hers.

“don’t they look lovely?” empty words spoken from an even emptier heart—she feels like she’s lost him, even though she knows he wasn’t even hers to begin with. “everyone’s already calling them the couple of the century. how fitting, don’t you think?”

dongjin knew he was paying for the sins he allotted on the battlefield. his own cruelty to others has been doubled back to him in the form of his personal relationship.

there were many things the general could stomach, things that most people ran from. but as he saw his wife pinning after someone else right in front of him, made dongjin want to throw up the champagne he just drank.

yes, this was god’s vengefulness for dongjin continues avoidance of death and his cruelty. it would be one thing if he didn’t hold actual feelings for jayeong but he’s been fond of her since they were first introduced.

how pitiful that he couldn’t even tell his wife that he loved her.

dongjin, the so-called fearful lone wolf the country was a coward. he knew that his wife didn’t love him, yet he still went forward with the engagement when he had the power to end it. maybe there was a part of him that hoped, that prayed that jayeong would one day return feelings he had for her.

he cleared his throat, bending down to whisper in her ear, “ jayeong, be careful your skin is almost green with envy, we don’t want people talking.”

dongjin sighed at her words, “ they have to be if they were any less than perfect than the public would rip them to shreds. i don’t envy any of them.”

lies, he wished he could light up jayeong’s eyes like prince sejong did by just walking into a room but he would never admit that out loud.

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

he checks his watch for the second, third, fourth time—foot anxiously tapping against marble tiles as he frustratingly sighs. what’s taking them so long?—don’t they know he has a kingdom to run? 

this is why he’s never quite cared much for parties: exceedingly boring and far too useless. his time’s better spent in the castle, holed away in his office and focused on the growing mountains of paperwork father’s passed onto him with every year inching closer to succession. part of him’s thankful for the lack of siblings for his line to the throne is a rather straightforward one, but it’s nights like these—nights where he wishes he could split himself into two—where he longs for a counterpart to deal with these more.. frivolous responsibilities.

too consumed in his thoughts, he doesn’t even pay half a mind to eunjung as she beckons closer, only notices when her hand’s on his chest and his eyebrows are furrowing in suspicion. he scoffs, “it’s ‘your highness’, lady eunjung,” he corrects through gritted teeth. “i’m not king yet.”

the threatening creep of doors opening catches his attention, straightening his back and lowering his jaw. almost as if by instinct, he offers his arm out for her to hold. “don’t forget to smile—they’re all suckers for a good smile.” an overdramatic chime of trumpets call in their entrance, and he starts, one foot after the other, as they’re greeted with a flurry of lights and applause. it’s going to be a long night.

“ah, forgive me, i guess i’m just overwhelmed by your kingly aura,” eunjung wants to throw up. but her mother always told her to stroke a man’s ego. forget cooking him dinner, tell him he’s smart and his heart will open eventually.

she didn’t hate sejong per se, but she cared more for her future role as queen, she wanted power and in their world, this was the highest she can go. especially if she were to become the mother of a future king.

eunjung thrived at these parties, charming, witty but not too witty, she knew when to be yielding. everything since her birth, the dance lessons, the boorish tea parties lead up to this moment. she had to play the role of a blushing bride to be, someone head over heels for the man beside her.

and while it seemed sejong cared little for her, she hopes he was a good actor. it would be disappointing if he wasn’t.

taking his arm, she gazes up at the prince with warm eyes. “ of course, your highness, why wouldn’t i smile? this is a day i’ve been looking forward to since we were kids.” she said, her voice a bit louder than usual, hoping that the nobles around them would overhear.

as they walk into the party, eunjung does her best to ignore the enviness glares from the other young women in the party. she knew that sejong was popular, and many women were disappointed but their engagement had been known for some time now. she had hoped they would have died down by now.

“big smiles huh? i think many of these women would rather see me in tears,” she whispers to the man beside her.

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

@mxilinh​. he shouldn’t be so hostile, really—she’s his future wife after all. it’s something about the way she holds herself: how her not caring for him makes him care for her even less. it’s unexpected pettiness, for he’s long known his birth has led to this—seldom does one bear the title of a prince and also hold the power of choice at the same time.

father—ahem, his majesty always nags that he should treat her with kindness (a happy wife is a happy life, or so he says), but sejong would rather bother himself with less—for even on a good day, he can barely remember her name. so he just stands there, behind emboldened double doors, adjusting his uniform and (impatiently) waiting for the guards to finally announce their entrance.

“try not to embarrass me,” he snides, eyes glancing to his side briefly as he sighs, begrudgingly stepping closer to her as time ticks on. “if you ruin my reign before i even get crowned, i swear, i’ll have your head.”

eunjung cared little for parties. they were just distractions for the bigger issues at hand. the higher class only ever gossiped and stuffed themselves before dancing the night away. they cared little of the common folk and less about the economy.

they were stuck in the gilded birdcage that was the capital.

yet, eunjung knew this was what her life was going to be after she married the prince. Sometimes, she wished she was a man, she could have been her father’s successor instead of the bride for the prince who cared little for her.

as she walked towards sejong, she frowned. the medal on his uniform was a bit crooked, she would have to ensure the maids paid better attention when she moved into the palace.

eunjung nodded her head, “of course, your majesty, i wouldn’t dare.” ah, threatening her already? she assumed that wouldn’t happen until after the wedding at least.

“ your majesty,” she called, the doors were about to open, she had to do this quick so it would work. her pale fingers quickly brush over his chest, readjusting the medal. “ we can’t have you looking out of sorts,” she muttered as she quickly retreated her hand as the doors opened.

[mxilinh]

“ Listen! If you wanna have a good spike you gotta make sure you got bam! and woosh it down you feel me?” the volleyball player exclaimed, moving his hand in excitement. 

[stevienick]

# grown siblings fighting over tamagotchis

[mxilinh]

laudiis‌:

since the publishing of the dating rumors, seohyung was the last person heera wanted to see—out of embarrassment, probably, but mostly out of fear that this had ruined any slight of chance of them being together. so when she spotted him in the company building, her immediate instinct was to turn back around and walk the other way … of course he just happened to spot her first, though. “u—uh,” she stammers. “y—yeah. i’ve been busy. we’ve been busy—duchess! that is. super busy.”

he frowns. that’s not good. it must have been so hard for her to deal with this, “ that’s good, being busy with duchess is good that means your debut is gonna come up!” okay maybe that was a stretch. “ but you...you gotta keep your strength up, like don’t skip any meals and take a lot of breaks!” seohyung said, somehow for the first time he felt a bit nervous around the other.” do you have time, to maybe grab something at the nearby convenience store?..please?”