Law School Stuff

[lawstaceyblr]

When you take your recovering Floridian (city-raised) partner to a Canadian national park for a sunset canoe paddle, and get one of the best photos of your life.

[lawstaceyblr]

Forgot my meds today

Remembered an hour into my 2.5 hour drive into the office.

Too late to go back, so I'm just rawdogging lawyering with ADHD.

My head is so noisy.

I'm distracted by every goddamn sound.

And every nerve is on high alert, ready to pounce on the impending danger my anxiety is telling me is around every corner.

The thing they don't tell you about being medicated for ADHD is that you get used to being able to function.

So when you miss a day, the world feels like it's crumbling around you.

I don't want to live this way. More than anything else, being unmedicated makes the ever-present desire to put rocks in my pockets and walk into the ocean so much harder to ignore.

So, if you're also hanging on by a thread, let's hang on together.

Because I've seen what the world is like when I'm well, and it's worth hanging on for.

[lawstaceyblr]

Yeah, sure, my clients think I'm together and in control, but they don't know that I spend the majority of my day in pajamas I've worn for *several* days, and my hair is barely kept presentable by dry shampoo and a prayer.

My ADHD and anxiety love to team up and make it so that I have gone two weeks without a shower, not because I hate showers but because I just. can't. make. myself. turn on the shower to start the process.

It's things like this that I wish I could include in my appeal of the CRA's decision that my disability doesn't significantly impact my day-to-day function.

I wish I could send them photos of the sink perpetually filled with dirty dishes, the moldy cup of noodles on my desk that I *know* I should just pick up and throw out, or the stupid pill organizer I need just for two pills a day, and even then I have three people reminding me to take them (and still manage to forget or take the wrong one at the wrong time).

Instead, all they see is "lawyer" and figure I must be fine.

[lawstaceyblr]

I haven't posted on this hellsite for years, but given the apocalyptic state of the world, I decided to come back.

Updates on me:

Joined an online D&D campaign in April of 2020 (we all know why), and fell in love with a woman living just outside of Seattle who was playing in the same campaign, and we started dating (5 year anniversary is coming up in a few months).

In August of 2020, I tumbled head over heels in love with another fellow player, this one living in Florida. I introduced them to polyamory, and they said "oh my god that's why I am like this".

In the summer of 2021, another fellow player in the campaign living in Scotland and I started a NSA, long distance, kinky relationship. By September, I was head over heels again, and on the Fall Solstice, they asked if they could be my boyfriend.

A few months later, with the support of these three amazing people, I left my narcisstic husband. I finally felt free for the first time in my life.

In 2022, my partner from Florida came to Canada to try out the cohabitation thing with me. I adopted their cat (my stepson) and we spent a few months sorting out a blended cat family (my two girls are not nice to outsiders).

Later that year, I left the job I loved at the firm I'd articled with, not because they were bad, but because practicing family law while going through your own divorce leads to burnout. Took a job doing probate work in a sleepy little town in Nova Scotia. Before the end of this year, my partner from Seattle joined us in the house I bought there.

Divorce was finalized in early 2023. Got married to one of my partners at the courthouse less than two weeks later. Forgot to mention it to my parents for a year.

A little over a year ago, I escaped the boring probate job at the toxic law office, and started working remotely, focused once again on family law. Struggled through spousal support payments, scraping together whatever I could to survive, and managed to get them terminated by the end of 2024.

Meanwhile, I made two trips to Scotland to see my partner there, and discovered that it is my home. I'm working toward my qualifications to practice law in Scotland, so that I can hopefully move there.

I've been on a gender journey, too. My partner in Scotland came out as genderfluid, and a few months later, I did too. A few months after that, my partner from Florida came out as genderdiverse as well (maybe it's contagious?).

We're living this polyamorous, queer, genderdiverse, anarchist life in the middle of rural Nova Scotia, with goals to land in Glasgow and build a polycule empire that is one giant found family who share resources and space and skills.

All of this to say... It can happen. Whatever it is in your weird little heart that you wish you could be... you can be it.

[bisexualbaker]

New super simple computer game or phone app idea:

It's like whack-a-mole, except it's for practicing your friends'/loved ones' pronouns.

Representations of people pop up in designated spaces with randomized sets of pronouns. You click on/tap the ones that are correct, and avoid the ones that are incorrect.

The game includes some customizable data where you can basically make "characters" who look like the people whose pronouns you want to practice, BUT you can also upload your own pictures/photos/drawings/whatever images to represent them as well/instead.

Regular mode is just one person and the pronouns they use; in challenge mode, you can have multiple people pop up in a single game and practice all of them at the same time. Maybe up to five people?

Prizes for winning are, like. Collectable stickers or something, IDK. Maybe you can put that person's avatar into cute frames that get fancier as you win more? Bronze, silver, gold, platinum?

No penalties for losing, you just get to try again.

If someone's pronouns change, you can "retire" their old pronoun set and start fresh with a new one, keeping your old prizes in a special imaginary cabinet for inactive pronouns or something, or you can delete the old one entirely.

Some sort of option for people whose pronouns depend on circumstances; maybe tied to an accessory or specific photo? Not sure how it would relate to Challenge Mode, though.

Maybe some stock characters to practice on?

Anyway, probably waaaaay easier to make than Duolingo Meets Animal Crossing.

That's all I have for now, I think.

[kviralingvisto]

👀👀 I wanna make it

[bisexualbaker]

You have my blessing ♥

[lawstaceyblr]

Please please please make this I need help with retraining on new pronouns AND facial recognition!!

[rebellum]

Not queer as in gay but queer is in a political movement against heteronormativity, amatonormativity, cisnormativity, ideals of parenthood with a single long term partner as 'THE natural part of life that everyone wants'

Queer as in sex ed for kids and the elderly, queer as in free condoms in old folks homes, queer as in destigmatize STIs and stop calling them dirty, queer as in pro-sex workers and decriminalization

Queer as in decolonisation, prison and police reform/abolition, as in education reform, as in medical reform, as in harm reduction clinics, as in not only more women's shelters but also men's shelters and gender-neutral shelters

Queer as in anti-racist, anti-fascist, anti-transphobia, anti-queerphobia, anti-intersexism, anti-aphobia, anti-fatphobia, anti-islamophobia, and anti-antisemitism

Queer as in "yeah my gender IS sparkly blue and my sexuality is one you've never heard of and that's okay"

Not queer as in gay, but queer as in rallying call

[chaoticdumbasshalforc]

Some of my fave Black Fae Day lewks:

Slays.bySarah on IG

Etoilesroses on IG

Phleshe on IG and maybe on here? 

Feycrafts on twitter

KSHAW_tv on Twitter

Kagoneko on twitter

Hotboybebop on Twitter 

Queer_Elf_Club on Twitter 

And Thorns_and_Flames who lives in  my head rent-free

[adaswordlace]

https://twitter.com/CriminelleLaw/status/1037511306906099712

Reminds me of my mom getting remarried several years ago, for about a weekend - dude waited until after the wedding to tell her he expected her at waiting at home with dinner waiting when he finished work.

I dunno, like I get that this version of manhood is “normal” but goddamn is it the most brittle, contemptable fuckin thing

[unified-multiversal-theory]

This is NOT these women’s fault in any way - these men hide their misogyny until they think you’re hooked. They know what they are doing.

[kittiesatemypronouns]

These women are wise and brave. I admire them so much!

[geekandmisandry]

Not even touching the fact that he thinks teachers and nurses are lesser…he wants her to be less so that he can be more.

[imnottechsupport]

Am i the only one that thinks they could have come back from this? Like please tell me this was just the straw that broke the camels back and not a one off event. He must be an at least somewhat respectable person if she managed to stay with him up til that point. Him feeling lesser is a taught facet of his life pushed upon him by the patriarchy. It obviously damaged the way he viewed his gf, and his relationship, but that doesnt mean it cant be untaught. And of course its not this womans responsibility to be his teacher, but i hope she at least made him aware that this is what happened and why she left…

[geekandmisandry]

Literally how can you come back from someone wanting to have more power over you?

He’s not a little kid, he’s a grown ass man and if he hasn’t learned that 1. Teachers and nurses are smart as fuck and 2. That women aren’t and shouldn’t be lesser to him then when the hell is he going to learn from that?

Why does it need to be a final straw? Signs that someone is this fucked up are logs, not straws. And being a “respectable” person is easy when you’re lying about who you are and what you think.

[dragonsrequiem]

These guys waited until they thought their women couldn’t possibly exist without them and then tried to shut down the things that made them special. Being nurses. Public defenders. Teachers.

These men pointed out what they were so proud of… how hard they worked… and tried suggesting that they stop. Tried making them feel bad about it. This is a common pathway into emotional and psychological abuse.

It was designed to make them feel bad and give it up. The next step would have been “what else can I take away”. Those situations where the woman’s confidence is shattered and it takes her years to get free of the asshole… 9/10 started with comments like this.

Please understand that this wasn’t an off the cuff thing. This was something he’s been thinking for a while, but waited to say til he thought he could make her change to suit him.

[crossbowsandunicorns]

This is so important. These are not normal or innocuous comments these are red flags and classic behavior of abusers. People like this are insanely manipulative. They hook you in and pick you apart piece by piece. It starts with this, moves on to isolating you from your support system, and then flashforward a few years and you’re convinced that you’ll never be good enough and you need them to survive. You end up broken and completely subservient. These women did the right thing and are brave for speaking. Abusers aren’t usually the neighbors you hear screaming and shattering dishes like you see in the movies. They’re your “friendly next door neighbors” and they keep quiet. People are too scared to talk. Again, why her speaking up is so important.

[porcupine-girl]

THIS STUFF ALL OF THIS.

People wonder how anyone stays with an abuser - this is how. Because manipulative people don’t hit you or insult you on the first date. They wait until you’re invested in them and the relationship, and then they start small, with comments like this.

And they rely on the fact that so many people’s reaction will be “okay, that sucked, but we can come back from this.” They bank on their victim thinking that way. They might even apologize and claim they won’t do it again. But they always do, and they escalate slowly, so you’re a frog in a pot of hot water.

Don’t wait for the tenth red flag, because by then you’ll be starting to think that hey, that’s actually kind of a nice shade of red, so maybe it’s not so bad to have all these red flags around, maybe if I just decorated with them they’d be okay.

[foxy-voxy]

Also, women are not rehabilitation centers for poorly behaved men.

[lawstaceyblr]

Reblogging for that last comment, which should have been the first.

[tardisman14]

Reblog if, no matter the size of the role, you would agree to work with the Muppets if offered the chance to do so, no questions asked

[lawstaceyblr]

My life would be complete.

[lexicals]

I think it would be fun to draw all of my pcs together at some point when I have time/energy...... just seeing them all next to each other would be fun I think

[lawstaceyblr]

One time, I had to self isolate in one room of my house (waiting for a covid test that was negative- yay!) and my teenage son made me an adventure to play with all four of my PCs together.

[averagefairy]

why do they even sell phone screen cleaning wipes haven’t you ever heard of rubbing your phone on your boob til it’s clean? you can’t sell me anything more effective than my own tiddy

[inqilabi]

All mothers I’ve ever known were effectively single mothers, even when they had a husband.

[maverick2095]

[tchaikovskaya]

a LOT of women agree with this but men like….. universally object its hilarious

[inqilabi]

case in point. And it’s actually the mom on a call and not the dad.

[addictedtocaring]

Tbh I predict a lot of post covid divorces. This is a very common story.

[lawstaceyblr]

Can attest to the fact that Covid has (anecdotally) increased my family law practice by about 100%.

That being said, I do know a few couples (and my husband and I are one) that do actually balance emotional labour and child care differently but we are the exception, not the rule.

It takes an active defiance of social norms and CALLING OUT the misogyny expressed by people of all genders to accomplish this.

The number of women who will make jokes like “haha my husband can’t be left to take care of the kids because MEN amiright?” is astounding. Or will say “well if I let him do the laundry he’ll do it wrong”.

Like, don’t you see how much you are holding us all back with this bullshit?

[hhjjjjhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhksl]

this show broke my brain and now it’s your turn

[feels-by-the-foot]

I honestly don’t care how many times I reblog it

peepo makes me lose my fucking shit

[lawstaceyblr]

My kids (who are teens) and my husband reference this at least twice a week.

[saphore]

your last words before you die are the 3rd line of the last song you listened to. what are we saying ladies?

[lawstaceyblr]

Lol - “It’s got me high” (26 by Caamp)

[the-bright-path-deactivated2021]

[sexedplus]

[sexedplus]

This week is Bisexual Awareness Week, so here is a comic about what being bisexual might mean to bisexuals! Also, some other identities!

[prismatic-bell]

QUEER

THEY ADDED QUEER

I WANT TO CRY WITH FUCKING JOY

[deathcomes4u]

This is a really good explanation of the current state of these labels.

[rainbow-oppossum]

This is so good. I freaked out a bit at the first definition of bi because it seemed to mean that bi is exclusive, but I’m so glad they included different definitions

[lawstaceyblr]

I follow a lot of catradora fan art blogs for someone who’s watched exactly zero of the reboot....