healer's hands

“there's {n o w h e r e} to hide from the ghost in my mind. it's cold in these bones of a man and a child.” +

[emmcaddison-deactivated20201012]

That was incredibly sweet, she hadn’t met anyone that sweet in a very long time and it certainly caught her by surprise, she didn’t mind the company, of course, it always made her joyful and Lucy was never someone who preferred to be alone. “Be my guest,” she said with a small smile on her lips, “I would actually love some company, a good conversation will keep my mind away from wanting to go to the ice rink.”

[lbrteddy-blog]

“Well, it’s a good job that I have no strong yearning to go on the ice either,” he smiled, folding his arms across his chest. “Can I get you a drink or anything? Maybe something warm? Hot chocolate? Coffee?” He suggested, his lips spreading into a wide grin, flashing white teeth.

[emmatramell-blog]

She breathed in through her nose and looked down at her hand which was held by his. A gesture which offered her a lot of comfort and suddenly she felt the strong need to share it with him. Tell him what she considered her personal ghost, something she didn’t talk about with anyone. But when she looked up and saw his worried eyes she wanted to smile, tell him everything was fine when in reality it wasn’t. It never would be. She had known that for the past eight years of her life. And this time changing topic wasn’t an option. Once she spoke again her voice was faint and she wasn’t able to look in his eyes. “I was nineteen. It was an ectopic pregnancy. I hadn’t known. The baby had no chance of survival.” Once she was done talking, Emma turned towards him. Her expression blank while her heart was racing. “I usually don’t talk about it. I don’t like talking about it. But to answer your question, I’m okay. Like I said, you learn to be okay.” She gently squeezed his hand.

[lbrteddy-blog]

He was honestly at a loss for words. How could anything that came out of his insignificant mouth make a difference? He gulped down the lump in his throat and tried to desperately blink back the tears in his eyes, but a few fell down his cheeks anyway. He wasn’t allowed to be upset - or at least he didn’t feel like he was. He didn’t have a right to be upset over something that he hadn’t had to endure. But looking at his friend, his heart ached more than it had ever ached before. He’d only felt heartache like this once before in his life but that was... well. That was a long time ago. “Emma, I...” he began, but was too choked up to continue. He brought her hands up to his lips and kissed her knuckles gently, hoping that the affectionate action would be enough to convey how he felt. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered against her hands, eyes closed. He knew that those words meant absolutely nothing, but delivering them was a force of habit for him now. They slipped out automatically. 

[eliassinclair-blog]

“Most certainly. I ate one about ten minutes ago.”

[lbrteddy-blog]

“Food poisoning doesn’t come on that quick though. It takes two hours at the least.”

[vincewill-blog]

“It’s all good, dude.” Vince figureing the additional kick of whiskey he put in would be appreciated. “I’m sure you did all you could.” He nodded, reaching for the extra cup sitting beside him, throwing it back for a long swig.

[lbrteddy-blog]

He was so used to hearing that by now that the words had become a blur to him. They were meaningless. Of course he hadn’t done everything that he could. If he had, that little boy would have still been alive. Wouldn’t he? “Yeah... Yeah, I guess,” Teddy said sadly, staring at the hot liquid in his cup instead of at the man beside him. 

[charlotteontherun-blog]

Charlotte held his gaze for a moment or two as she handed over the glass; they were eyes that had seen sorrow, windows to a soul that had felt it. It was a common sight in the bar, and she’d seen it far too often in her life not to recognise it. “Right,” — and that was the moment she felt even worse. Of course he’d carry the burden of losing children under his watch; of course he’d feel responsible. He was the guy on the other side. Watching tears fill his eyes, Charlie felt a strong urge to hold his hand.. and even though she felt entirely wary of the fact that they were but mere strangers, she couldn’t help but envelop his own for an extended moment. “I can’t imagine what it must be like to be in your position.. It isn’t fair. It’s never fair. I have a daughter and I couldn’t ever fathom losing her — I think I’d die. I’d also, however, never blame the hospital or the doctors if they’d done everything they could. They’re the ones more likely to save her than me.” Giving his hand a squeeze, she pulled away with a small smile. “Don’t blame yourself. It’s not your fault.”

[lbrteddy-blog]

Despite the ever-crushing feeling of shame and guilt, deep down, the doctor knew that this girl was right. When she mentioned having a daughter of her own, his eyes lit up, and he smiled warmly at her, holding her hand tightly. “You do?” He asked. “How old is she?” He adored children, and of course, that was a given, due to his job, but right now, to get his mind away from the awfully saddening thoughts of the little boy whom he had been unable to save, he needed to hear her talk about her own happy, healthy little girl. “Please... tell me about her,” he asked, as he ran his thumb over the skin of her hand, finding the reassurance of the beautiful young woman who was practically a stranger to him oddly comforting.  Once she’d pulled her hand away, he suddenly missed the contact, and reached for it once again. “I, uh... Is this okay?” He asked, gulping down his anxiety. “I think I just need some sort of contact right now...”

[princessemxlia]

Emilia had to admit that Teddy was quite calming and while her petite body was in a bit of pain, she tried to take a deep breath. Groaning softly, she felt the back of her head and saw a bit of blood. “Oh, gosh. Not blood.” She said, a bit skittish about it, until she heard Teddy speak once more, about how he knew her. Emilia smiled, nodding. “Yes, that’s me. The painter and apparently the klutz as well. Of course I remember you.” She said, although for a brief moment she saw double of him. “I’m seeing two doctors though, unfortunately. Not that there two of you wouldn’t be lovely, but I assume that’s quite troubling medically.” Emilia shivered against the ice and tried to think of something else, anything else. “You know…” Her voice came out soft. “I think I found out what I was going to paint…A mural to Peter Pan. Wouldn’t that be lovely for the children? Flying away to Neverland could be helpful, healing to them…It was for me as a child.” Emilia smiled, taking her own mind off the pain. 

[lbrteddy-blog]

Noticing the blood, Teddy’s heart clenched in his chest, for he didn’t know how bad the wound was, and he didn’t dare lift her head to check. His panic only furthered when she explained about her hazy vision and he rested his palm upon her forehead gently, being able to detect the fear in her trembling voice. “Peter Pan, huh?” He smiled, a bright, happy grin that reached his eyes, stroking her hair gently. “That sounds really nice. I think they’re going to love it, Emilia.” Figuring that it was going to do her no good here on the cold, wet ice, he asked her, “do you have any pain anywhere other than your head, Emilia?” and when she responded negatively, he took it upon himself to gently slide his hands beneath her body and instructed her to wrap her arms around his neck. Once she’d done so, he gently lifted her light body up off the ground and carried her down the steps of the rink and into the little make-shift boxroom that provided the place for skaters to change back into their shoes. He carried her out to the back room, a little staff room that he was told he was welcome to use, and he placed her down as gently as he’d picked her up. “I believe an ambulance has already been rung. You’ll need to go to hospital, just so they can check you over,” he explained to her, making all of his words clear so she could understand. “But I’m going to stay with you until they arrive.” He reassured her. “I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”

[wordsthat-speak]

It is a curious thing, the death of a loved one. It’s like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down through the air and there’s a sickly moment of dark surprise.

A Series of Unfortunate Events (Lemony Snicket)

[allyharringtxn-deactivated20200]

Ally giggled, shaking her head. “I’m just simply pointing it out.” She said, shrugging. “Can’t a beautifully sophisticated girl be curious?” 

[lbrteddy-blog]

“You’re very, uhm...” he paused, struggling to find the right words, ones that wouldn’t offend her, “self-assured,” he decided, gulping down the lump in his throat.

[allyharringtxn-deactivated20200]

Ally slightly pouted, but then smirked. “Shame, then. Truly. You don’t know where you’re missing.” She teased, in a sing song voice. “Pleasure to meet you, I’m sure. Don’t tell me you’re all cuddly like a teddy bear, are you?” 

[lbrteddy-blog]

“I can be,” he chuckled, “why?” His eyebrows furrowed and his palms grew clammy. “You’re not suggesting anything, a-are you?”

[eliassinclair-blog]

“I think I’m getting sick.” he breathed, inhaling sharply through his nose. “Word of advise… Don’t eat the waffles.”

[lbrteddy-blog]

“You think it was the waffles that did it?”

[kennedyjosephs]

Kennedy was about to open her mouth to tell Teddy what she was going to have, but she just smirked with a raised brow as he interrupted to tell her he was paying. Her expression changed to a frown for a moment before she finally told him. “A soy cappuccino, please, and thank you,” she told him, going and sitting at a booth in the corner of the coffee shop, waiting for him to finish ordering and join her.

[lbrteddy-blog]

Once he’d received the drinks, he walked back over to the pretty blonde and sighed as he sat down, because he hadn’t done this in a while. He’d let his work consume him and he’d forgotten to actually just breathe, and enjoy moments like this one, with other people. Sipping his drink, he closed his eyes for a moment, stretching his arms up to release the tension in his body. “Sorry,” he apologised. “I just... I haven’t done this in a while. Y’know, like...” he trailed off, not really knowing what he should call this. “Just talking with someone else. Being with someone else. I’m kind of a lone wolf.”

[vincewill-blog]

“It’s all good, dude.” Vince figureing the additional kick of whiskey he put in would be appreciated. “I’m sure you did all you could.” He nodded, reaching for the extra cup sitting beside him, throwing it back for a long swig.

[lbrteddy-blog]

He wasn’t the best at small talk at the best of times, let alone at times when he felt like he was about to fall apart, but sure enough, whatever was in the cocoa in his hands began to relax him and he felt like he could talk to the man beside him without fear. “No, I’m sure there was something more I could have done,” he answered truthfully, “but I always feel that way when we lose a patient, so...” He shrugged. “Thanks. For the drink. I’m Teddy.”

[allyharringtxn-deactivated20200]

“Well, maybe. Being arrested means I’ve been adventrous. You like adventure?” She asked, smirking. “I’m Ally Harrington. Your name?” 

[lbrteddy-blog]

“I can’t say that I do, no,” he answered honestly, because Teddy was a man of practicality and sensibility. “Uh... Teddy Montgomery.” He smiled quickly, unsure of just what exactly he was getting himself into here, but playing along all the same.

[kennedyjosephs]

Kennedy shrugged, that’s just how things were, how they’d always been. Sometimes she was able to find a coffee shop that didn’t charge extra, but a lot of the time their coffee was terrible so she didn’t go back anyway. As the man spoke she looked up at the place he gestured to, nodding with a smile. “Sure, looks good,” she said, walking through the door and into the warm coffee shop. She looked around, it was pretty empty, and she wondered if it was just because of the time of the day or if the coffee was bad. “What are you getting?” She asked curiously.

[lbrteddy-blog]

“Oh, I’ll just get an espresso,” he nodded. “What about you? It’s on me, and don’t even try to think about arguing!” He grinned, letting her hand slip out from his arm. Once she had told him her order, he gestured over to a little table in the corner. “Why don’t you go sit down?” He suggested. “I’ll sort it all out.”

[princessemxlia]

Emilia took in a sharp breath, as she tried to sit up, trying to regain normality in movement. “N-No, no, I have to move…I’m freezing.” She told him, softly, but her head was dizzy, fuzzy. “Emilia…Emilia Vanderbilt.” God, she was cold and she only hoped none of the paparazzi were getting this. Luckily, she didn’t see any flashing lights, but instead little dots above her, as Emilia tried blinking rapidly, to make them go away. “Gosh, I slipped on the ice? Please tell me I didn’t break any bones…I’m so sorry, I’m such a klutz. I knew I shouldn’t have tried skating.” 

[lbrteddy-blog]

As soon as she began to move, he prevented her, lying her back down again. “No, no, no, please, Emilia,” he said, his gentle hands placing her down, “I know it’s cold, darling, and I’ll get you off the ice as soon as I can, but it could be dangerous for you to move. I don’t know what you’ve done. You could’ve hurt yourself quite badly.” Stroking her hair again, he tried to comfort her as best as he could, until it dawned on him that he knew this girl. He’d met her once a few weeks ago, in the hospital. “Hey, I know you,” he said softly, a smile on his lips. “You’re my little artist. I’m the doctor from the children’s ward, do you remember me? I asked you to do that painting.” He wanted to make sure that he could put her mind to rest before he began to examine her, because trying to suss out the matter with a calm patient was ten times easier than it was with a panicking one.

[allyharringtxn-deactivated20200]

Ally turned around, looking at the handsome man in front of her. She smirked, tilting her head to the side. “What? You impressed, handsome?” 

[lbrteddy-blog]

“I, uhm...” he began awkwardly, feeling a little hot under the collar. “It’s not really an accolade to be proud of, sweetheart.” He shrugged, chewing his bottom lip nervously. 

[princessemxlia]

“My…My head.  I…have no idea what happened. Why am I on the ground? Damn, why does my head hurt so much? Please, tell me what happened…” 

[lbrteddy-blog]

“Hey, sweetheart,” Teddy smiled warmly, his heart aching as he noticed the tears in her eyes. She was clearly disorientated, naturally, and perhaps even concussed. “You slipped on the ice. Don’t move.” He brushed her hair back off her head, kneeling down beside her. “Can you tell me your name?”