Be Careful. I Can Burn You

I'm Peter Wyatt! It's a pleasure to meet you, I'm sure.

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Wandering around the school by myself. Feels very empty.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Yeah.. It's quiet.

[ohwolfgang-blog]

PeeTa | Hanging On

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Charlotta’s whole body stiffened when Peter sat down beside her. Not that she didn’t want to see him because she did - more than anything - she just didn’t want him to see her like this. It wasn’t as though Scott leaving had left her this way because it got like this too often these days. And then a week or two later she’d be over the moon, ecstatic, on a live wire. Hiding it from Peter was too hard, she didn’t think it would be this hard but it just was. She so badly wanted to curl up into a ball and let him hold her and kiss her and make it better but she was a mess. Why would he want to touch her when he realised that she was only the bubbly, fun girl he first met, every once in a while. 

Charlotta lit up another cigarette and smoked half of it before she finally spoke to Peter, her voice sounded deeper than normally, slightly hoarse. “Hey.” She mumbled, drawing circles with her finger on the bench. She pulled her hair from the messy ponytail and let it cascade down her shoulder, she ran her fingers through it. It used to be pretty, she used to be a nice girl, a girl that people liked and wanted to be around. Now nearly everyone she knew when she first came here was gone and the girl she was when she came here had left with them.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Peter glanced at her and then looked back down at the bench. Charlotta looked haggard. Slightly ill. And he could see her shivering. Unable to help himself, he scooted next to her and lit up his palm and placed it a safe distance from her clothes, but still close enough that she could bask in the warmth. He sat silently, waiting for her to speak up. He didn't know what Char was feeling, but he wanted to make her feel better and hold her and make sure she was alright. He sneaked another glance at her and looked back down. When she replied softly, he looked up at her. "Hi." He said again.

He wondered what was going through Charlotta's head. What had her so sad that she wouldn't share it with him. He shifted closer to her and wrapped and arm around her, mostly to feel her there and real, but also to heat her shivering form. "Should have worn a jumper." He said, his eyes fixed on his shoes.

[ohwolfgang-blog]

PeeTa | Hanging On

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Charlotta knew she was feeling sorry for herself, she despised the mere idea of self pity and now here she was, wrapped in her own self-loathing, refusing to leave a darkened, empty room that seemed so much bigger and so much emptier by the minute. She couldn’t get out of her own mind, her memories got louder and louder and soon she had to leave that room. She had to get out. Other students gawked at her, some clearly under the impression that she had left with Scott and yet there she was, dark hair in a tangled ponytail, bags under her eyes, clutching a carton of cigarettes as if her life depended on it. 

She darted from the girls dorms and out the main entrance, taking the steps two at a time. She found a bench near the gardens where she and Peter had met and chain-smoked the rest of her pack, legs crossed beneath her. She knew Peter had been looking for her, he’d knocked on the door a few times but she just pretended she wasn’t in her room, pretended she didn’t exist for a while because honestly, that was just how she felt. She felt like she was fading, ceasing to exist. She wanted it to stop, she really needed it to stop.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Peter sighed as he shut his laptop. He couldn't concentrate on Doctor Who right now. He needed to talk to Charlotta. He ran a hand through his hair and walked out his room and to the girls dorm. He was about to knock on her door when he noticed that the door was very slightly ajar. "Charlotta?" He called softly. A little voice behind him said "She isn't here. Went to the gardens, I think." a girl said. "Thanks. Thank you so much" Peter replied to her, smiled and walked out the door. He didn't know who it was, but he was glad she had told him.

He all but ran to the garden and found Charlotta looking haggard, sitting where they met. She was clutching a pack of cigarettes in her hands and smoking them as if her life depended on it. He slowly walked to the bench and sat down. He could feel her stiffen. He didn't look up but instead just said, "Hi."

[ohwolfgang-blog]

PeeTa | Hanging On

Charlotta hadn’t just been avoiding Peter, she’d been avoiding everyone. The school was still inhabited despite the new found freedom with the guards leaving them to themselves but in Char’s eyes, the place was empty since Scott had left with nothing but a note under her door and not a word in her ear. She felt like she’d lost her family, the only person she felt she actually knew in this damn place and now he was gone and she felt alone. Of course Peter was still there for her, the boy was more devoted than she could ask for, than anyone had ever been for her and yet she was avoiding him like the plague. Maybe she just didn’t want Peter to figure it out, that one minute she was up, so happy she could burst and then a moment later she was down to ground. For days. And nothing could pick her back up again.

Really, Charlotta wanted to hold on to Peter, she wanted him to stay with her and continue to be as sweet and as kind as he had been from the moment they met but could he really care for a crazy girl? A girl who’s mind had been against her since the day she was born? Maybe she was destined to be this way, maybe the memories was just the beginning. She knew she had to lose Scott eventually, she knew that nothing would last forever and from the moment she came to Tate and all this good had come to her, she had been positive that it would have to leave her in the end. And maybe the day had come for her to lose what she loved. That’s why she was avoiding Peter. She couldn’t lose him too.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Peter knew something was wrong. He just did. Charlotta was avoiding him and he didn't know why. He decided it was probably that Scott left Tate that had her feeling so down in the dumps. Many a times he had passed by her room to find her, make sure she was alright, but she was never there. Then he tried the rooftops. She wasn't there either. Maybe she knew of some other place in the castle and chose to hide there. He didn't understand why she was hiding. Had he done something wrong? Had he driven her away? Maybe she didn't trust him anymore. 

It drove him mad, knowing that there was a possibility that she didn't care for him anymore. They had never really discussed their feelings, and as girly as that sounded, he wanted to. He wanted to know what she was feeling and he wanted to make sure that she never felt sad, or lonely again. He could handle being her friend, but he didn't think he's be able to carry on without her anymore. It felt impossible now. 

[le-feu-brule-blog]

This lockdown thing gets boring after a while.

Anything fun I can do around here?

[ohwolfgang-blog]

So bored. So bored. Sooooo bored.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

I’m sorry, I’ll do better! I promise!

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Yeah you better, it’s boring in here.

Also hi. [grins]

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Alright. 

Hi back [grins]

[ohwolfgang-blog]

So bored. So bored. Sooooo bored.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

I guess I haven’t been keeping you very well entertained then. 

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Not nearly enough, Peter. Not nearly enough!

[le-feu-brule-blog]

I'm sorry, I'll do better! I promise!

[ohwolfgang-blog]

So bored. So bored. Sooooo bored.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

I guess I haven't been keeping you very well entertained then. 

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Merry Christmas?

I mean, I don’t know how merry it’s going to be with these ass-holes lurking about here. 

[ohwolfgang-blog]

It’s as merry as you make it.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

But I can't even call Aph and fuck it, I call every Christmas. Where ever I am, I always call her. 

I just hope she doesn't go do anything stupid.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Merry Christmas?

[le-feu-brule-blog]

It was. Still though. Yesterday was pretty miserable too. 

[miss-maker]

Yeah. Well. So was the last two months.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Yeah, well. Point there.

I'm Peter. And you are..?

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Neverland || PeeTa

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Charlotta smiled softly as Peter pulled her closer, her chin resting on his shoulder as he held her. “I know you would’ve.” She murmured, closing her eyes, her fingers running gently up and down his back, moving slowly side to side to the music which still somehow played even though they were trapped in their own little world. Even though he was holding her so close, she was sure that she was dreaming. Normally, Charlotta would be scared, she would be holding back, refusing to admit that she was crazy about him. She looked up and kissed his nose playfully, amazed at how at ease he made her.

Char shook her head, her blue eyes wide and pleading. Her hand was still in his, squeezing it gently, begging him to listen to her. “You are amazing, Peter. Amazing. And I like you a whole lot. I think I have since I first met you.” She whispered, her other hand reaching up to run through his hair gently. “And trust me. I’m not a huge ball of mush on a daily basis so I’m not making this up.” She smiled at him in the dimness, amazed that he thought so little of himself and so much of everyone else. How he could be so kindhearted and yet rip himself to shreds. “I’m not going to hurt you.” She promised. And she wouldn’t. She knew what it felt like all too much.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Peter laughed, wrinkling his nose at the little kiss. He smiled, bending down to kiss her nose. He shivered at the feel of her hands on his back. "You're always so cold, Char." He murmured, pulling her hands away from his back and holding them, letting his body heat seep into her skin. It was strange, how she brought out the child in him, making him want to do things that he wouldn't want to otherwise. He didn't understand what it was about her that made him feel safe enough to open up to her. He would usually not even bother with these things, but here he was, dressed and dancing with a beautiful girl in his arms. 

Disbelief clouded his features. "R--Really?" He asked, slightly hopeful. "I.." He took a breath. "I've liked you too Charlotta." He smiled. He leaned into her touch and hummed, his voice inaudible. His eyes fluttered closed at her words, their bodies still moving from side to side. "I know." He whispered against her hair. "I know Char." After a few moment, pulling himself together, he whispered, "I've wanted to do something too.." He said, leaning down and placing a kiss on Charlotta's beautiful lips. "For a long time, actually." He said his hands moving up to cup her face. 

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Merry Christmas?

I mean, I don’t know how merry it’s going to be with these ass-holes lurking about here. 

[miss-maker]

Someone told me it was yesterday.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

It was. Still though. Yesterday was pretty miserable too. 

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Merry Christmas?

I mean, I don't know how merry it's going to be with these ass-holes lurking about here. 

[ienchanted]

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Merry Christmas!

[thatswiftiefrommalaysia-deactiv]

I’m coming back into focus when Caesar asks him if he has a girlfriend back home. Peeta hesitates, then gives an unconvincing shake of his head.

“Handsome lad like you. There must be some special girl. Come on, what’s her name?” says Caesar.

Peeta sighs. “Well, there is this one girl. I’ve had a crush on her ever since I can remember. But I’m pretty sure she didn’t know I was alive until the reaping.”

Sounds of sympathy from the crowd. Unrequited love they can relate to.

“She have another fellow?” asks Caesar.

“I don’t know, but a lot of boys like her,” says Peeta.

“So, here’s what you do. You win, you go home. She can’t turn you down then, eh?” says Caesar encouraging-ly.

“I don’t think it’s going to work out. Winning…won’t help in my case,” says Peeta.

“Why ever not?” says Caesar, mystified.

Peeta blushes beet red and stammers out. “Because…because…she came here with me.”

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Neverland || PeeTa

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Peter noticed the fond way she spoke about Scott. The way her smile got a little fonder and her eyes a little brighter. She really loved him. It brought a fond smile to his face. She talked about him they way he talked about Aphrodite. He missed her. He smiles and her bright eyes. He had yet to tell her that he knew Charlotta Falk. He looked at Char with nothing short of adoration in his eyes and wondered if maybe there was a chance that he was good enough to be with. Seeing her face break into a breathtaking smile, he hoped that this wouldn’t be a one time thing. Char wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t let her. He wanted to wake up to that smile, and fall asleep to it. It wouldn’t do any good to become sentimental now. She wouldn’t want him anyway.

Peter was taken aback when she pressed her lips to his again. He made a slight sound of surprise but kissed back, feeling like he was in heaven. How could he possibly be holding the most perfect person in his arms? How was that possible? How could Char be doing this? He was the weirdo who spent hours watching Doctor Who reruns, and ate Cheetos like they were going extinct. He was so strange, and she was so perfect, so how was this even happening? God, he wanted to hold her and love her and.. It’s probably not going to happen, because someone better will come along, but he just wants to be by her side. For as long as she’ll let him.

He held her tightly against him, and looked deep into her eyes. Peter’s own eyes widened. “How did you know?” He questioned, a smile on his face before he shook himself out of it. He was living in a fantasy. She couldn’t want him. No one would ever. “Char, I— I’m not perfect. I’m anything but. I—” He caressed her face. “I don’t deserve you. You are.. Fuck, Charlotta,” He said, “You’re.. You’re infinite. I’m nothing. Don’t waste yourself on me, Char.. You can do so much better than me.” He smiled, his eyes welling up slightly. She’d realize that he was nothing and she’d leave. And he’d be alone again. 

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Charlotta watched him, watching her, watching him and wished that it could always be this way. That they could just stand there smiling at each other forever. She would be happy with just that, she really would. But when his lips pressed back against hers, returning her kiss, it felt like a million stars exploding on her lips, like infinite butterfly wings fluttered in her stomach. His hands sent fire along her skin and when they kissed it felt like a million lifetimes had passed by the time they pulled apart. Her eyes still half closed looked to him, her lipstick having stained his. He looked torn, confused. 

“I was half asleep when you set me down but I called out to you. I guess you didn’t hear me.” She shrugged, matching the smile on his lips. How could she not, that smile was perfection. She frowned, how could he think so wrong of himself? How could he see himself in such a light? He was wonderful, kind, beautiful. And so, so wrong in his words. She shook her head, it was she, who should be surprised, she who should be wondering if this was all real. How could he look at her and think ‘beautiful’? She was anything but. “You are perfect. To me anyways.” She said, sighing gently. They were so close she could feel his warm breath on her nose. “I can’t do better. There’s no one better. I swear.” She whispered, reaching down and grabbing his hand, entwining their fingers together.

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Peter blushed. "Sorry." He said. "You know I would have stayed the whole night beside you if you wanted." He said. He kissed her cheek. "You are too precious for this world, Charlotta." He smiled, pulling her to him and holding her close. It felt like home. It felt like hot pancakes doused in maple syrup as soon as he woke up; it felt like hot chocolate chip cookies; it felt like a warn fire on a cold winter's night; it felt like.. peace. He smiled into her hair, a smile that was crazy and in love and hopeless at the same time.

Hearing her words, he frowned. "I'm not, Char. I'm really not." He stumbled. "I mean.. I'm just.. not." He said, not wanting to list his flaws to her and making the slight chance he still had disappear. "God, Char. You have become to mean so much to me, and in such a little while, it's crazy!" He smiled when she entwined their hands. "I just really don't want to wake up one day and have you say that I was a mistake. I know how dramatic it sounds, but I wouldn't be able to handle it." He looked away, his hear feeling a little tight.

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Neverland || PeeTa

[ohwolfgang-blog]

Charlotta laughed, watching him smile, as his lips spread beautifully across his lips and she thought that she could look at that forever. That smile belonged on those lips and those eyes were made to light up like Christmas. “He’s like an old man,” she mused, smiling fondly. “He hates most things.” And it was true, Scott hated nearly everything spare his sister, his books, his old movies and her. And Christoph. Always lingering. Even she missed him. She turned her attention back to Peter, he was still smiling, always smiling and it was goddamn contagious. She couldn’t help herself from smiling so hard it nearly hurt. She couldn’t help but love his arms around her, holding her close, holding her safely. 

Regret. How could she regret this? The impossibility of it made her laugh. She had never been so sure of anything in her life and the vodka leaving her mouth burning only gave her the bravery to do it. She wasn’t just sure, she was positive and she broke all the promises she made to herself when George left and kissed him again, her lips as eager as her heart as it pounded against her ribcage like it wanted to break free and give itself to him. Because this girl, with her sore brain and her wavering thoughts who was dressed like a Disney character, who danced by herself to David Bowie and read three books a day wanted to kiss this boy wearing green tights and she wanted to know what he danced to and if he would dance with her to David Bowie. 

She pulled away again and leaned her forehead against his, feeling dizzy but not from intoxication. From him. “I can’t regret you.” She said, her voice firmer than she felt. “The only regret I know is not kissing you before. In the gardens or on the roof. Or chasing after you when you lay me down that night.” She ran her thumb along his cheek, bit her lip, red and smudged. “I can’t regret you. You’re perfect.”

[le-feu-brule-blog]

Peter noticed the fond way she spoke about Scott. The way her smile got a little fonder and her eyes a little brighter. She really loved him. It brought a fond smile to his face. She talked about him they way he talked about Aphrodite. He missed her. He smiles and her bright eyes. He had yet to tell her that he knew Charlotta Falk. He looked at Char with nothing short of adoration in his eyes and wondered if maybe there was a chance that he was good enough to be with. Seeing her face break into a breathtaking smile, he hoped that this wouldn't be a one time thing. Char wouldn't do that. He wouldn't let her. He wanted to wake up to that smile, and fall asleep to it. It wouldn't do any good to become sentimental now. She wouldn't want him anyway.

Peter was taken aback when she pressed her lips to his again. He made a slight sound of surprise but kissed back, feeling like he was in heaven. How could he possibly be holding the most perfect person in his arms? How was that possible? How could Char be doing this? He was the weirdo who spent hours watching Doctor Who reruns, and ate Cheetos like they were going extinct. He was so strange, and she was so perfect, so how was this even happening? God, he wanted to hold her and love her and.. It's probably not going to happen, because someone better will come along, but he just wants to be by her side. For as long as she'll let him.

He held her tightly against him, and looked deep into her eyes. Peter's own eyes widened. "How did you know?" He questioned, a smile on his face before he shook himself out of it. He was living in a fantasy. She couldn't want him. No one would ever. "Char, I-- I'm not perfect. I'm anything but. I--" He caressed her face. "I don't deserve you. You are.. Fuck, Charlotta," He said, "You're.. You're infinite. I'm nothing. Don't waste yourself on me, Char.. You can do so much better than me." He smiled, his eyes welling up slightly. She'd realize that he was nothing and she'd leave. And he'd be alone again.