Growth And Love

[lettersandemotionslove]

Dear Healed Self,

I am happy that we have healed. It took years to finally heal. I am grateful we no longer feel like a burden to people. I am grateful for God as well and I hope he keeps us structured and is at the center of everything we do. That way we can use our voice to communicate to people our story and heal others with the lessons we learned along the way.

I remember, when I was a kid I used to be so proud of my scars. Now...Not so much. Physically my body looks different and I feel insecure about it. Kid me still loves the cool bike scar and hopefully healed me loves it as well.

While the emotional scars...Should I be proud of those? Times I got laughed at by my peers for choosing Channing Tatum as a role model of my book character. I worked all night to make the paper look worn down and I got laughed at. What an interesting scar compared to the rest. Interesting.

-Crystal

[lettersandemotionslove]

Dear Soul,

What are we here for. The lostness I feel at times is annoying. It's sad. At this point, I'm complaining. Maybe that's what I need. I need to sort through my feelings. Understand my mind. I'm sick of education and learning the regular way. I'm tired of being corrected.

I take things slow. Maybe it's a taurus rising thing, or maybe when I speed up life, I crash hard. It's okay to take things slow. Sometimes, it feels like time has stopped. Am I doing anything right at this point?

What. Is. My. Purpose? I desire so many things. But what is my purpose, dear soul..? What am I here to do..?

Whatever it is....I hope I can save people.

[lettersandemotionslove]

Letter to my mother,

Dear mother. I feel an unsettling feeling towards your actions. Yet....You've done so much for me so I have no choice but to be grateful. I have gratitude for the homes you've given me to stay in. I appreciate every part of you and I love you. My anger stems from not being able to repay the favor you have given to me.

My soul weeps for you though. The struggle you've been through. Dear mom. Toxic or not. Sick or not. Sad or not. You will always be my dear mother. And you've done so much for me. It is time for me to move on and thank you. I am grateful and I appreciate the things you have provided. Thank you. ❤️

[lettersandemotionslove]

Dear Wisdom,

Let's work together. I wish to learn about you. Wisdom, we must work together to conquer the world. Okay maybe not conquer, but I would love for you, wisdom, and experience to guide me to a greater cause.

Thoughts in the back of my mind make me doubt myself. So, I will continue to read and take charge of my life to develop wisdom. I need to grow more. Growth is important. I need to read and grow and love. One day at a time. Wisdom may be the glue that holds the puzzle pieces together. Wisdom from God, at least. Okay, let's do this.

[lettersandemotionslove]

Dear God,

I want a travel buddy. A companion that guides me from place to place. I feel the need to cry going with my family. They don't understand my needs. I need to learn how to speak more often. I can say I feel out loud so many times. The family is arguing, as I reflect over my vacation, I realize that I need a travel partner who loves me and checks on me. Just until I learn how to voice my opinions.

Thank you God for everything you've given me.

[lettersandemotionslove]

Dear Money,

My heart aches for you. I need you. I panic when I lose you. I need God today honestly to manage you. I feel this uneasy feeling without you. I feel awry, hurt, and lost when I lose you. Especially when I'm hurting. Money, you are amazing but like I need to learn to calm down when you leave.

I tend to panic when a sudden expense pops up. I acknowledge that I panic. I acknowledge that I feel a lack of control in that scenario of losing money to a charge.

Money is not everything. But in a negative scenario it helps...At least in my opinion.